They're Not Bugs, They're Features

by RunicTreetops

Isn't Dad a Mammal? (The Hatching - Part 1)

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“I know that what you just heard was a lot to take in, so don’t feel ashamed if you need a few moments to process it all. That said, are there any questions?”

Fluttershy looks across the thirty or so students in the classroom before her. A single bead of sweat rolls down her cheek as she observes their expressions, which range from shocked to confused to disgusted to… well, clearly holding in laughter. She had expected as much, and she hasn’t really been looking forward to this unit. On the blackboard behind her, big, bold lettering spells out “REPRODUCTION - MAMMALS.” Beneath it are a few key points on what classifies a mammal and how they reproduce.

“...Very well, then. I hope today’s lecture was insightful. W-we won’t be covering any of this on the final, so absorb the information as you will.” As she opens her mouth to continue her thought, the School of Friendship’s bell rings out throughout the building. Students of all shapes and sizes begin gathering their things and standing from their desks. “On Monday we’ll go over some non-mammalian species, like dragons and changelings. Have a nice weekend!”

It takes no time at all for the crowd of students to funnel out of the classroom. There are a few hushed murmurs and sighs of relief, as well as more than a few students popping their backs or rolling their shoulders on the way out. However, Fluttershy’s attention is grabbed not by them, but by the single, solitary student still sitting at her desk. She’s staring down at her notes with a furrowed brow, her hoof tapping mindlessly on her cheek all the while.

“Seta?”

“Hm?” As if awoken from a daze, Seta looks up at her teacher with wide, surprised eyes. “Y-yes, Miss Fluttershy?”

“Are you okay? You seemed very… engrossed today. N-not that that’s a bad thing!”

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m fine.”

“Is there something on your mind?”

“I…” Seta’s bright blue eyes dart around the room. Her tongue presses against the inside of her cheek as she tries to find the words that best represent her thoughts. After a few moments, she takes a deep breath. “Okay. I’m a changeling, right?”

“Correct.”

“And changelings aren’t mammals.”

“We’ll be discussing changeling biology in more depth on Monday, but yes.”

“Still, the whole thing separating mammals from non-mammals is that they don’t lay eggs, right?”

“It’s a bit more complex than that. Mammals also feed their young via milk, and–”

“No no, I get that. I know I’m young, but I already knew most of what you taught. Trust me, Mom was very open about the whole ‘bird and bees’ thing with us.”

Seta shudders as she recalls her mother’s flat, matter-of-fact explanation on where children come from.

“Then what’s the issue?”

“Well… I guess I never really thought about it, but… isn’t Dad a mammal?”

“Hm? Er, yes, I suppose he is. I-I’ll admit, I’m not very knowledgeable about human anatomy - I don’t think there’s a pony in Equestria who is - but he’s said as much to me before.”

“Okay, but… where does that leave me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Dad is a mammal, sure, but Mom sure as heck isn’t. Neither am I! I came from an egg!”

“O-okay, what’s your… oh. I, uh, I see the problem.”

“Oh, do ya?!”

“N-now now, no need to raise your voice.”

“I’m kinda freaking out over here, Miss Fluttershy! What if Dad… isn’t my dad?!”

“Seta!” It’s rare for Fluttershy to raise her voice, so the sound of her doing exactly that causes Seta to immediately freeze in place, her attention squarely on her teacher. “Have some faith in your father! I’ve known him for a very long time, even longer than you. Do you really think he’s the type to hide something like that from you?”

“Well… no.” Seta’s eyes narrow as she takes another long, deep breath. When she speaks again, her voice is shaky and quiet. “I’m not so sure about Mom, though.”

Fluttershy opens her mouth to respond, but finds that she doesn’t have the right words. She thinks better of it, then decides to change her course.

“I’m sorry, dear. I don’t have an answer for you. That’s something you’ll need to bring up with your parents.”

There’s a moment of tense silence before Seta lets out a hesitant sigh.

“Thanks anyway.”

Without another word, Seta gathers her belongings and quickly shuffles out of the classroom, leaving a concerned Fluttershy behind.


Sugarcube Corner bustles with activity. Right after classes get out on Friday afternoons is as busy as the place gets, so the fact that five colorful changeling teens were able to get the circular corner booth all to themselves is nothing short of a miracle.

Seta sits in the far corner, her face contorted into a look of sheer distress and her mouth glued to a straw leading to a chocolate malt. Canthus and Terga sit on either side of her, the former resting a hoof on her shoulder. Tarsus and Gena sit on opposite ends closest to the booth’s exit, with Tarsus appearing to be the only member of the family amused by the situation.

“Come on, Seta, there’s no use getting so worked up over something we don’t know for sure,” Canthus reassures.

Seta lifts her mouth from the rich dessert to better express her sheer panic to her younger brother.

“But what are we supposed to do?! Walk up to Mom like ‘Hey Mom, did you cheat on Dad?’ She’d KILL US!”

“Mom wouldn’t do something like that!” Gena’s voice is uncharacteristically loud, garnering the attention of her siblings and causing her to blush before sinking into her seat.

“Gena, I’d have thought you’d be the first to accuse Mom of cheating,” Terga questions.

“W-well…” Gena bites her tongue, not wanting to reveal what she saw in the park one evening some months ago. “You thought wrong.”

“Nah, that honor goes to me.” Tarsus leans back in his seat as he takes a confident bite out of a strawberry-filled pastry. “I wouldn’t really call it an ‘accusation,’ though. More like… a ‘statement of fact.’”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Canthus growls.

“Come on, guys. Mom was a queen for hundreds of years, and she was a damn good one. Stealing love was her whole thing. Remember the story about Princess Cadance’s wedding?” Canthus recoils at Tarsus’s words, but no one notices. “Do you really think Dad is the only guy she’s fucked? She doesn’t exactly have a clean track record.”

“How could you say something like that?!”

“Can you prove me wrong?” Tarsus’s smug grin disappears as he glances between his siblings one at a time. Terga and Gena open their mouths to protest, but no words come out. An uncomfortable silence overtakes them, and no words are spoken for several long, tense seconds. “Well?”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“...Why are you so okay with this, Tarsus?” Gena’s voice is quiet. She’s trembling in her seat, causing Terga to lean over and wrap a wing protectively around her. “I… I don’t want to lose our family.”

“Who said anything about losing our family?”

“You’ve seen how protective of Mom Dad is.” Canthus’s voice is surprisingly stern and stoic, his expression hard and cold. “If Mom cheated on him and he’s still around, I can’t imagine he knows about it. If we bring this up… well. Who knows?”

“...” After a few more seconds of silence, Tarsus sighs. When he speaks again, his voice is also quiet, but there’s a raspiness to it that wasn’t there before. “I don’t want to be right, either. I’m just trying to be realistic.”

The silence overtakes them once more, but it is quickly broken by the sound of a straw reaching the bottom of a recently emptied malt glass. Everyone looks to Seta, who has remained relatively quiet since the conversation began. She smacks her lips together as she finally backs away from her comfort food, her eyes closed all the while.

“We’re going to have to bring it up one way or another. I don’t think any of us are going to be able to sleep comfortably with this on our minds. Agreed?” Slowly and with hesitation, her siblings nod one by one. “Alright. Let’s go, then.”


Author's Note

Part 2 coming soon!

They're at that age where they think they know everything. It's a part of life I think we all try to forget. :raritywink:

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