“...You’re kidding.”
“While I understand why you might think that, it is the truth, Miss Fluttershy.”
“But that shouldn’t be possible. Twilight was certain it wasn’t possible!”
“Trust me, ma’am. I am not usually one to question the validity of Twilight Sparkle’s claims. However, she is not a medical practitioner. The scans speak for themselves.”
Fluttershy sits perfectly still, her face frozen in a confused stupor. Standing just a few feet away is Nurse Redheart, who gingerly holds a clipboard against her chest. It was supposed to be a routine checkup, but after hearing Fluttershy mention a few oddities that she’d been feeling recently, she started having suspicions. A few tests later, those suspicions were confirmed.
“I’m going to be a mother.”
“Indeed you are.”
“Oh…” The color drains from her face. “Oh my.”
“Is there a problem?”
“A few, actually.” Fluttershy’s voice is even shakier and more timid than usual, but she continues to speak regardless. “It’s not like I don’t want to be a mom, I just wasn’t expecting it to happen now. I-I mean, Anon and I aren’t even the same species!”
“So I take it Mr. Anon is the father?”
“Absolutely.” There is no hesitation in Fluttershy’s voice. “He’s the only person I’ve ever… uh, you know.”
“Well, it’s not unheard of for different species to be compatible, especially with ponies. Admittedly Mr. Anon is quite different from your typical yak or changeling, but there is a precedent for this.”
Fluttershy sighs. That’s not what Twilight told her at all.
“Oh, what am I going to tell him?” Nurse Redheart goes quiet at her words, reacting only by raising an eyebrow. “We’ve never even discussed this as a possibility.”
After hesitating for a moment, Redheart clears her throat.
“While that is quite the predicament, I’m going to have to ask you to leave. I have another appointment in just a couple of minutes.”
“O-of course! Thank you so much for everything, Nurse Redheart!”
“You’re very welcome.” Fluttershy quickly heads for the door as Redheart speaks up from behind her. “And, uh, good luck with Mr. Anon.”
It takes Fluttershy longer than she was hoping to find her boyfriend. He was supposed to have the day off from work, but he wasn’t at home. After some searching and asking around, Pinkie Pie was able to point her in the right direction. Now, she stands on a grassy hill in Ponyville Park, looking out at the beautiful landscape around her. It’s a warm, early spring day. Winter Wrap Up was just a couple of weeks ago, so the budding flowers and growing greenery makes Ponyville look refreshingly pleasant.
And there, sitting on a park bench, is Anon.
Anon is a human. At least, that’s what he says. Nopony really knows what he is for sure or where he came from. One day he just stumbled out of the Everfree Forest, dazed and confused. Unsurprisingly, Twilight was particularly interested in him. One thing led to another and the next thing Fluttershy knew, she was being consulted on what to do with this foreign creature.
She did her best, but Anon is far from a wild animal. She couldn’t just leave him with the rabbits or bears she takes care of, but she also didn’t really know what to do with him. It wasn’t long until she was offering to let him live with her until they could get everything sorted out.
That was almost five years ago.
Of course, he didn’t live with her all that time. He moved out after he got a job and saved up his bits for a year and a half. She would have gladly kept him, but he insisted that he should be “independent.” If there’s one thing she learned about him during their time together, it’s that he values his freedom above all else. While he’s gotten along well with Equestrian society for the most part, she’s caught him raising a middle finger towards the princesses whenever he can. He insists that it’s a sign of respect, but she’s seen the way the corner of his mouth curls into a smile when he says that.
Apart from that, she’s learned much about him and his history. He used to be a freelance artist, and he never stuck around in one place for too long. He’s a big fan of jokes, and sometimes she wonders if his penchant for wanting others to smile is comparable to Pinkie’s. Despite this behavior, he maintains an aloof and casual vibe that some ponies find hard to work with. However, Fluttershy has seen right through him. It’s hard to tell what he’s thinking, but he really is a great guy, and unlike her, he isn’t afraid of anything.
Also, he’s really, really, really hot. She can’t even explain why! Is it how he’s three times her height? How his lack of fur lets her take in every detail of the toned body underneath? It’s a strange feeling, being attracted to someone who is a different species. And yet, it’s a feeling she cherishes.
Because he likes her right back.
They’ve been dating ever since he moved out. Neither of them try to make a big deal out of it, much to the chagrin of Rarity, but they’re happy together. Comfortable. Content.
And now she’s pregnant.
After taking a deep breath to prepare herself, she approaches the bench.
“Um, good afternoon, Anon.”
“Oh, hey, Fluts! Take a seat, you’ve gotta see this!”
“I-I’m sorry?”
“No time to explain!” With a rapid but surprisingly gentle movement, Anon lifts Fluttershy off of the ground and places her on the bench next to him. All the while, his eyes are glued on a mare some fifty feet away. “Watch this.”
She follows his gaze, squinting her eyes as she notices the mare. She stands underneath an orange tree, with one particularly enticing-looking orange dangling from a branch just out of reach. She stretches her whole body to reach for it, just barely coming short.
“Sh-should we help her, or–”
“No, here comes the good part!”
Realizing what must be done, the mare jumps into the air to get that extra bit of height. However, as soon as her hoof touches the orange, she recoils and falls to the ground with wily eyes. She looks around in a panic before sprinting away as fast as her hooves can take her.
“Er, what was that?”
“Enchanted orange. Whenever somepony touches it, they hear this booming voice in their head yell ‘WHO DARES TOUCHETH THE ORANGE?!’ Gets ‘em every time!”
Anon slaps his knee and leans back on the bench while a hearty laugh escapes him. Meanwhile, Fluttershy looks at him with a mixture of concern and mild amusement.
“How did you enchant an orange?”
“Got Twilight’s help. She was awfully quick to agree, too.”
Probably to keep you from doing something less harmless.
“W-well, I’m glad you’re having fun.”
“Oh, yeah! April Fools’ Day is the best.” After taking a moment to stretch, he finally turns to look her in the eyes. He greets her with a big, goofy grin. “Speaking of, how are you doing, Fluts?”
“I’m… I’m a bit anxious.”
“Oh? Is this a normal anxious or a ‘we need to talk about it’ anxious?”
“We really need to talk about it.”
Anon’s expression suddenly hardens. He sits up from his relaxed position and gives her his full attention.
“I’m all ears.”
She smiles. For as unpredictable as he might be, he’s always there to help her when she needs it.
“Well, I went and got a checkup today. They had some… interesting news.”
“I see.”
“And… um… well…” For a moment, she struggles to get the words out. However, her eyes go wide as Anon wordlessly takes her hooves in his hands. Looking up from said hooves back into his eyes, she sees nothing but love and care. Feeling emboldened, she blurts it out. “We’re going to be having a foal.”
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...Anon?”
“...Ah… hah.” Anon suddenly lets go of her hooves, placing one hand on his thigh and the other over his eyes. “Haha! Good one, Fluts! I didn’t think you had it in you!”
“Wh-what?”
“The old pregnancy scare. One of the oldest tricks in the book, but always reliable. I didn’t think you had the guts to pull something like this! I must be rubbing off on you, haha!” Through her shock, she feels Anon give her a hearty, almost desperate pat on the back. “And here I was, believing that you hated April Fools’ Day!”
“Anon, I’m not–”
“Welp!” Without warning, Anon stands from his seat. “Thanks for the laugh, Fluttershy, but I’ve got places to be and pranks to pull!”
“W-wait! It isn’t a joke!”
“See ya!”
Completely ignoring her words, Anon practically sprints away with little more than a nonchalant wave goodbye. She’d chase after him if she wasn’t so flabbergasted. He knows she doesn’t like to pull pranks. He knows she wouldn’t joke about something like this, especially.
And he hasn’t called her by her full name in years.
She feels her blood run cold. She begins to shiver in place, retreating into the defense mechanisms that she’s used time and time again throughout her life. Slowly, she lays down on the bench, covers her face with her hooves, attempts to obscure her body with her wings, and starts to sob.
“And that’s what happened.”
“I cannot BELIEVE him! I am going to give that man a piece of my mind!”
“Hold on, Rarity.”
“‘Hold on?!’ Darling, our dear Fluttershy is pregnant, and he wants to treat her like a joke and abandon her!”
“But we don’t have the full picture yet!”
“Um, girls?”
“Twilight, I know you mean well, but take it from a mare who knows her way around a stallion: Anon is a piece of trash that needs to be thrown out with the rest of the garbage.”
“It was one conversation!”
“One important conversation!”
“GIRLS!” Twilight and Rarity finally look away from each other, shooting their glares at Fluttershy instead. She, however, does not back down. “Twilight, I am very upset with him right now. And Rarity, I am the one who is upset with him. Don’t do something rash on my behalf. That’s the whole reason I asked to speak with you in the first place.”
“R-right.”
“Sorry, darling. That was unbecoming of me.”
The two mares awkwardly clear their throats before continuing.
“Well, first of all, congratulations!”
“Indeed! You’ve always wanted to be a mother, have you not?”
“W-well… kinda.”
“Hm? Darling, you used to get so excited when you spoke about starting a family.”
“Yes, but that was before we met Anon. T-Twilight said it wasn’t possible, and I decided I was happy with just him and my animal friends.”
“While that is perfectly valid in its own way, surely you didn’t need to discard your dream entirely? Adoption is always an option.” Twilight tilts her head in confusion as she speaks, and Fluttershy awkwardly fiddles with the edge of the Friendship Map while she does so.
“W-well, that is true, but… I, um, don’t think Anon wants kids.”
“You think?” Fluttershy shoots Twilight a silent glance that says more than words ever could. “S-sorry.”
“I just don’t know what to do.” Fluttershy’s eyes stay glued to the map/table as she continues to poke and prod at nothing. “I still love him with all my heart, but… oh, I don’t know. I guess I just wish he was happier about this.” She lets out a long, drawn-out sigh. “Or that he at least didn’t treat it like an April Fools’ Day joke.”
“Did somepony say April Fools’ Day?!” Pinkie Pie bounces into the room unabashedly late for the meeting. A huge smile is spread across her face as she breaks the laws of physics and slowly glides into her seat. “Because let me tell ya, it has been a GOOD one! Soooooo many ponies have been asking me to help with their japery today! Ahh, it’s been so much fun.”
“Pinkie Pie, darling, I don’t think now is the time.”
“Huh?” Pinkie glances between the three mares in confusion. “Did I miss something?”
“I’m pregnant, Pinkie.”
“OH MY GOSH!” Pinkie throws herself across the table at Fluttershy, but freezes in midair just before reaching her. “Guess I should go easy on ya, huh?” With much less force, she floats the rest of the way before giving her a gentle hug. “That’s so exciting!”
“Th-thank you, Pinkie.” She lets out another sigh before continuing. “I wish Anon felt the same.”
“Huh? Anon?”
“Y-yes. He’s the father.”
“And you already told him?”
“He thought I was making a joke. Or, he at least acted like it.”
“Huh. That’s weird. He bought a bunch of cupcakes from Sugarcube Corner earlier and said he was heading home. I guess that does explain why he was so jumpy, though.”
“We have a location!” Rarity slams her front hooves with wily eyes before letting out an awkward laugh. “Sh-shall we go see what he is up to?”
“I don’t know.” Fluttershy’s voice is quiet and lacking any confidence. “I’m just not sure if I’m ready to face him again.”
“He at least owes you a proper conversation.” Unlike Fluttershy, Twilight’s voice is firm and determined. “I’m with Rarity. We’ll be there to back you up in case he tries to pull something ‘funny’ again. But, one way or another, you two need to have a proper talk about this.”
“I will pry it out of his mouth by force if I have to,” Rarity grumbles.
After hesitating for a moment, Fluttershy takes a deep breath.
“Let’s just get this over with.”
“ANON, YOU WILL OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW OR I WILL KNOCK IT DOWN!”
There’s a yelp from behind the door of the unassuming house. A few seconds later, said door gently creaks open as an eye peers through it.
“You didn’t even knock, though.”
“Irrelevant!”
“Rarity!” Twilight nudges her friend on the shoulder.
“H-hello, girls.” Anon opens the door the rest of the way, allowing him to see Rarity glaring at him, Twilight waiting patiently, Pinkie looking confused, and Fluttershy practically cowering. “Uhh, is this some kind of April Fools’ Day thing, or–”
“Hold me back, Twilight!”
“Stop getting so worked up!”
“Hiya, Nonny!” Pinkie skips in front of her friends and smiles at Anon. “You really really really hurt Fluttershy’s feelings earlier!” She leans forward a bit too much, forcing him to lean back. It’s unclear whether or not that’s on purpose. “And we think you two should have an actual conversation instead of pretending it’s a joke!”
“Haha, yeah, right! And I…” The forced smile on Anon’s face slowly melts away as he looks down at Fluttershy, who refuses to make eye contact with him. Her eyes have been getting mistier ever since she arrived. After a moment, Anon sighs. “C-come in, please.”
Anon turns around and trudges into his house. The girls exchange a glance before slowly following him inside. The house itself is extremely plain, with only basic furniture filling the living room. Apart from a sizable bookshelf, the only real thing of note is the mantle above the fireplace, which Twilight, Pinkie, and Rarity notice holds several photographs of Anon and Fluttershy together, oftentimes with some of her animal friends. In every single one, they look as happy as can be.
Anon takes a seat on the sofa. Pinkie throws herself into a recliner, while Twilight and Rarity both motion for Fluttershy to join her boyfriend. After a moment’s hesitation, she anxiously sits down a couple of feet away from him. Twilight and Rarity sit in two other chairs on the opposite side of the room.
“So…”
“So?”
Anon clears his throat. A few seconds later, Fluttershy does the same. Neither look at each other for a long while as a tense silence fills the space.
“Come on, Anon.” It’s Twilight who breaks the silence first. “You owe it to her to talk about this.”
“I-I’m not very good at… any of this.”
“Be that as it may, you broke dear Fluttershy’s heart.” Rarity, having finally gotten her temper under control, gives him an icy glare. “If you really love her, you’ll talk to her.”
“I-I do, I…” Slowly, he turns to face his marefriend. She stares at the floor, clearly doing everything she can to keep herself together. “...Are you really gonna have a kid?”
It takes her a moment to respond, and when she does, her voice is quiet and shaky.
“Yes. I am.”
“Ohhh gosh. That’s, uh… that’s a big commitment.”
“I know that.”
“I’m… really not used to big commitments.”
“I know that, too.” A quiet sigh escapes her. “I knew what I was getting into when we started all of this.”
“...”
“I-it’s fine if you don’t want this. I didn’t exactly ask you about it beforehand. I… I just wish you wouldn’t have blown me off like that.”
By the time she finishes her thought, she’s barely audible. There’s a pregnant pause as everyone waits for Anon to respond. Quietly, he takes a very deep breath, not unlike the ones Twilight takes when trying to compose herself.
“I didn’t think this was possible, Fluts.”
“Neither did I.”
“And if I were still at home, I’d be halfway across the world by now.”
“...”
“...Heh. Hey, do you remember what you said to me when you introduced me to Harry?”
“Um… n-no, not exactly.”
“You said, and I quote, ‘Wow, Anon. I can’t believe you’re not afraid of a bear!’”
“...Hmhm.” Finally, a giggle escapes from Fluttershy. “I think I do remember that.”
“And then you said, ‘You must be really brave!’”
“Yes, I did say that.” An anxious smile spreads across her face, not unlike the one Anon is also wearing. “Wh-why are you bringing that up, though?”
“Because you were the first creature to ever say that about me.”
“Huh?”
“Back at home, everyone called me a coward. They said the only thing I knew how to do was run away from my problems. They said I was afraid of the consequences of my actions. Of sticking to my guns. …Of commitment.”
“Anon, I–”
“And they were right.” Finally, she looks up at him, allowing them to lock misty eyes for the first time since she arrived. “Every single thing they said about me was true. Then I ended up here, and I thought, ‘You know, I could make myself seem really cool.’ And it worked.” Anon hesitates once again before continuing. “I wasn’t afraid of Harry. Really, I wasn’t. But I also didn’t know what to do when you said such nice things about me.”
“You are cool! Even if everyone called you a coward, you’re still a free spirit! You’re independent!”
“...Heh.” A single tear breaks free from the confines of Anon’s eye, slowly rolling down his cheek as he continues. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You know that, right?”
“O-oh, I’m nothing special like that.”
“You’re the first creature I’ve ever met that didn’t make me feel worthless. You wanted to be around me. You believed in me. You made me…” Anon takes one last deep breath before finishing his thought. “You made me consider really settling down for the first time in my life.”
“I… I did what?”
“I’ve considered leaving before. It’s what I’m used to after all, and there’s a whole world out there I haven’t explored yet.” A wistful smile spreads across his face before he wipes the tear from his cheek and refocuses on Fluttershy. “But every time I consider it, I realize that it would mean leaving you behind.”
“I wouldn’t stop you, Anon. You’re free to do as you please.”
“Heh. I figured you’d say that, but I just couldn’t believe that you’d trust me that much.”
“While this is touching,” Rarity interrupts, “you have yet to actually address the fact that your marefriend is pregnant with your foal, Anon.”
“...Fluttershy.” Just like at the park, Anon reaches out and grabs her front hooves while looking directly into her eyes. “I’m sorry. When you told me you were pregnant, I didn’t know what else to do. I panicked.”
“Anon–”
“I needed time to think. And instead of asking you for it, I brushed you off completely. I can only imagine how that must have felt.”
“Anon, it’s okay.”
“It’s not!” Anon raises his voice as his expression becomes somber. “I really am as terrible as everyone said. I don’t deserve Equestria, I don’t deserve you, and I definitely don’t deserve this.” Anon motions down to her belly, even though her pregnancy isn’t visible yet.
“That’s not true! Anon, there’s no one I’d rather have at my side! There’s no one I’ve ever met that I’d rather have a foal with!”
“...Th-then, may I ask for something selfish?”
“Of course you can.”
To Fluttershy’s surprise, she feels Anon wrap his arms around her as he pulls her into a tight embrace. She blinks, unsure of what to do for a moment before closing her eyes and returning the hug, wrapping her wings around him all the while.
“I want to stay here forever. W-with you, of course.”
“...Hmhm.” She giggles as she tightens her grip on him. “I guess I’m selfish too, then.”
The two of them remain like that for quite a while, simply basking in the comfort of their shared embrace. While the hug itself is nice, it’s everything else that makes them feel so content. Everything is out in the open. Thoughts long buried have been shared, and they’ve only grown closer because of it.
And now, they’re going to be parents.
“By the way, why did you order all of those cupcakes?” Pinkie tilts her head as she shoots her unexpected question at the still-being-hugged Anon.
“W-well, I might have been getting ready to apologize to Fluttershy already before you got here. Just… very differently.”
“I TOLD you!” Twilight shouts at Rarity.
“How was I supposed to know such a thing?!”
The two mares continue to bicker as Anon and Fluttershy simply laugh at the display. Although the news of Fluttershy’s soon-to-be foal was sudden, it brought their little family closer together than ever before.
Even if April Fools’ Day was the worst possible time for it.
“Oh,” Twilight says aloud as she reviews her notes. “I forgot to carry the twelve. You two are the exact opposite of incompatible.”
“...What?”
“Frankly, it’s nothing short of a miracle that this didn’t happen years ago.”
Anon and Fluttershy share a glance. Moments later, Twilight shrieks as an orange is tossed at her head, filling her mind with an unexpected shout of disapproval.
Author's Note
I figured there were probably enough jokefics for April Fools' Day already, so why not have some romantic drama centered around the holiday instead? 
As always, I appreciate any and all feedback!
