Adventures Are No Fun.

Twenty minutes after the sun had set and the moon had risen Screech sat on a bench mounted to concrete. Her tail twitched with excitement. Melodie smiled at her from the other end of the bench.

"You should take a deep breath," said Melodie. "I don't want you tackling Carver."

Screech took a deep breath. Her breath shined in the freezing air under two tall lamps. The moon light was so bright the lamps did little more than tint everything red in their dull glow. "Thank you for waiting with me. I love spending quiet moments with you."

Melodie rested her head on Screeche's scarf.

Just before sun rise the sky bus landed on the runway. All of the pilot ponies took flameless cigarettes out of their jackets.

Carver jumped off the bus and stretcher her legs. She looked around the bus terminal. She was not impressed. After a minute of looking she spotted Screech and Melodie curled up on a bench sleeping like foals.

Screech jolted awake as either a large pillow or a soft cart slammed into her. Carver clung to her like a tick. Her vision blurred. Streams of tears ran down her cheeks. She squeezed Carver so hard she knew it must have hurt. Carver squeezed back.

Melodie watched Screech and Carver hug with only a twinge of jealousy.

Screech let go of Carver and wiped away her tears. She tried to take a deep breath but she laughed away any air as it entered her lungs. After a few tries she calmed down enough to talk. "How was your flight?"

Carver laughed. "Horrible. Not only was the flight delayed thee hours it was such a bumpy ride I barely slept an an hour all night. We had to stop on a cloud because one of the pilots could not breathe. We had to wait an hour for a doctor. They thought the poor stallion was going to die. An hour after that a replacement showed up. The troubled pilot had to ride the bus back." She pointed to a smoking stallion who leaned on the front bumper of the bus. "He is feeling better now."

Melodie put out her hoof. "You must be carver."

Carver hugged Melodie. "Must I? It is great to meet you."

"We should head to the house and rest," said Screech.

"How is Second?" asked Carver.

"Still locked in his room," said Screech. She looked at the ground. "We can't let him out until we know he will not try hurting himself again."

Screech looked in the fridge for breakfast. "Shredded cheese, butter, a brick. I need to head out and buy a few things."

Glitter trudged into the kitchen. She let out a loud yawn. "This weeks food will be delivered in a few hours. What time did you get home?"

"We just got back," said Screech evenly.

"Don't take that tone with me," said Glitter. "You can take care of yourselves. If you did get in trouble what would I have done?" She squeezed her eyes shut. She whispered, "What would I do if you got hurt." She opened her eyes. "No more staying out all night young filly."

Screech nodded. "Melodie, I need to go buy a few things. Can you keep an eye on Glitter?"

"I am going with you," said Glitter. "I am the adult here. I can't have you out there alone where ponies are waiting to do Wonderbots knows what to you."

Screech placed a gentle hoof on Glitter's shoulder. "I understand you are going through a lot right now. You feel powerless and you want to have control over your life. You are trying to cope by forcing control over me. If you are going I am staying here and taking a nap."

Glitter nodded. "I will be back soon." She didn't move. "Okay, you can go, but you have to be careful. Actually..." She bit her bottom lip. "Why can't you just wait for the delivery?"

"I want to get a few special things," said Screech calmly.

Glitter trembled. "You can go, but you need to take at least one pillow with you." She started sifting through the pillows on the floor. "Not this one. Not this one. This one will keep you safe." She lifted a big blue pillow made of rayon and stuffed with goose feathers.

Screech took the pillow without protest.

Hundreds of unicorns, pegasi and earth ponies chatted and took pictures of Cloudsdale Arena and the four rows of brass statues depicting famous pegasi in sports ranging from buck ball to archery to hoof races. They marveled at the trees growing in terracotta pots encased in cinder blocks. They nearly filled the hundreds of square hooves around the stadium. The stadium itself was big rectangle stadium with high walls and only one wonderbolt painted on them. The equestrian flag flew proudly. The ponies milling about didn't wear gold or blue.

Half of the two dozen rows of three hundred seats were filled with ponies, griffons, dragons and changelings. Earth ponies out numbered pegasi two to one.

Screech stood in the middle of the stadium and gave an interview to a reporter who wanted to know what she thought it might be like to compete in the Cloudsdale rodeo with only one wing. The earth pony standing beside her only rolled his eyes once.

Second sat on four pillows. His head was above Razzle's.

Razzle stood among the seats leaning over a safety railing looking at the field below. "Amazing. Screech is famous."

Melodie smiled. "Don't tell me you want to join the rodeo. You might make a decent clown." She held her pillow and Screeche's.

Razzle looked Melodie directly in the eyes. "I want to join the rodeo. I am going to be the first cheerleader in rodeo history."

Carver smiled. She wore blue, black and white, Luna's colors. She waved her 'Go Screech!' flag high. "Actually there have been rodeo cheerleaders. There are not any now, but a hundred years ago they were fairly common."

Razzle looked to Carver. "Who are you?"

"I am Carver. Screeche's best friend from Canterlot."

Razzle pressed her lips together. "That is not fair."

"The first event is starting," said Melodie.

"Go Screech!" shouted Carver. "Storm-Chase-er! Storm-Chase-er! Storm-Chase-er!"

Melodie joined the chant.

"I thought the first event was pigeon hearding," said Razzle.

"It is," said Carver between chants.

"Screech can't fly. She is not in this event."

Carver nodded. "I know. That is not going to stop me from cheering for her."

Success, Carver and Melodie cheered the entire event.

Screech gave a blue ribbon to each of her friends and still had three left. She didn't place second in a single event. She and her friends sat at a little plastic table under a red and white umbrella. She looked at her hay burger and got teary eyed.

Carver and Razzle discussed rodeo cheer squads and how they worked.

Second heaped praise onto Screech. He gave her a play by play of things she did.

Melodie sat quietly and rested her throat.

Stitch Runner trotted up to Screech. He gave a wide smile. "I heard you were in town. Not many ponies make it into the news for picking a fight with the police and living."

Screech cocked her head. "I saw you in the stadium ten minutes ago."

Stich blushed. "Yeah. I was hoping to talk to you before the rodeo. You did great by the way. It is always impressive seeing you compete."

Screech flapped her wings. "I will do better in Canterlot."

Stitch nodded. "I know you will."

"Who is this?" asked Razzle.

"This is a rodeo friend of mine," said Screech.

"Of course," growled Razzle.

"Sorry for being rude," said Stitch. He grabbed a napkin and a quill. He wrote his address down. "Feel free to stop by any time."

"You found her!" yelled Clove Hitch. Two light pink unicorns with bright gold manes trotted up to Stitch.

"Let me guess," said Razzle.

Clove didn't place above ninth place in a single event. Even as a unicorn in the Cloudsdale rodeo she didn't stand out. "It is a ball to see you again Miss Stormcahser."

Screech forced a smile. "It is nice to see you too."

"Screech is the most amazing pony ever!" deaired Manger Tie.

"She is my sister," said Success.

"She is my marefreind," Melodie.

"I am pretty amazing," said Carver.

"Your performance was astonishing," said Clove.

Screech nodded. "Can we skip this today?"

Clove's ears drooped. "Yes. Of course. We didn't mean to embarrass you."

Manger glommed onto Clove and kissed her ear.

"You say that every time," said Stitch.

"We mean it every time," said Manger.

"I suppose we may lay it on a bit thick at times," said Clove.

"How is Constrictor?" asked Screech.

Clove licked her teeth.

Manger sighed. "The same. He tried to get all non-ponies banned from participating in this rodeo. Nine judges voted to ban all non-ponies. Thirty five voted against him."

"My dad voted against the ban," said Razzle. "The bribe they offered him was only five hundred bits."

"Your dad accepts bribes?" asked Melodie.

Razzle quirked her eyebrow. "My mom collects hot air balloons."

"Nine?" asked Carver. "Are they being disbarred?"

Razzle shook her head. "Not a chance. For better or worse that is not how the law works."

"For worse," said Screech.

"How are you doing?" asked Clove.

Screech took a deep breath. "I can't complain."

"The bird is back," said Melodie. She pointed at the sky.

A phoenix with six scorpion tails, four sets of wings, a cat's face on the back of its head and two garden snakes and a cobra as legs circled over head.

Screech took a potato chip and tossed it to the phoenix.

"Cool!" yelled Success. "What is that?"

"I call it Beast Of Atrocity, Grotesquerie, Horror And Anguish," said Screech. "Chaste for short. It is an amalgamation of tortured animals forced to live as one immortal being."

"It looks just as cute as in your drawing," said Carver. "I want to pet it."

"Is Chaste your pet?" asked Stitch.

"No. I saved it from two colts now it follows me around sometimes."

"How did you save it?" asked Success.

Screech smiled. "I dropped it through a hole in the clouds. It caught fire and regenerated. It was more heroic than it sounds."

"Like time she can fix anything," declared Clove. She kissed Manger's cheek.

Carver scratched under Chaste's beak.

"Did Screech set the two of you up?" asked Melodie. "Are you a match maker?"

"Yes," said Screech proudly. "I have a great sense for romance. Except for that time I dated Scoops. That was a bad lapse of judgement."

"We were having a ghastly disagreement," said Clove. "Our dear Miss Stormchaser reminded us of how important we are to each other."

"I swear to Celestia she is the polar opposite of Constrictor," said Manger. "You should have been our third triplet. I don't feel bad for saying it."

Every pony except Stitch and Screech (and Carver who was enthralled with Chaste) gave Clove and Manger judgmental glares.

Screech blushed. "You are doing it again."

"Sorry."

"Have you ever thought that just because you can fix something does not mean you should?" asked Second.

Screech slumped onto the table. "Yes. But what other choice do I have?"

Melodie stroked Screeche's mane.

Carver opened her duffel bag. She pulled out a acoustic guitar decorated with paint. "This is for you."

Screech took the guitar in her fore hooves. She stared at it with tears in her eyes. "Luna, this is a pretty guitar." She sat on the dining table and strummed. She tuned the guitar with her teeth.

"What do you want to play?" asked Melodie.

"Play just A Pony!" requested Success.

Screech knew the song perfectly. She used to listen to Just A Pony twice a day with Scoops. That and everything Feather Bangs ever sang. "I can't. Pick a song I like less."

"True Original," offered Carver.

Screech groaned. "Yeah that will do." She started playing.

Melodie started singing. Her voice was loud and clear. Screech joined her making it a duet. Their voices came together in an imperfect, but pretty, harmony.

Screech and Carver sat in the closet together writing letters to each other about the day they had. They drew pictures and shared crayons.

Screech fought to hold herself together. She refused to show how devastated she was. Tears ran down her face. She sobbed quietly.

Ponies ambled onto the sky bus.

Melodie hugged Screech first. Carver hugged Screech second. Melodie hugged Screech third. Screech hugged Screech last.

"It feels like you just got here," sobbed Screech. "I don't want you to go."

"I don't want to go either," cried Melodie. "Come with us. Run away."

Screech shook her head. "I want to. I would. Consequences be banished to the moon. I can't do that to Glitter. Second needs me. I can't."

Melodie bit Screeche's hoof. Her soft lips and sharp teeth gave her immense comfort. Then they were gone.

Screech sat on the ground alone and cried.

Screech hissed when the closet door opened and let in light.

"Are you okay?" asked Glitter.

Screech sniffled and choked back a sob. "I am fine."

"You have been crying for two days."

"I am fine!" snapped Screech.

Glitter placed a pudding cup on the floor. "This will help." She walked away.

Screech sighed. She picked up the pudding cup and followed Glitter to her room. She sat on the bed. "Can I talk to you?"

Glitter smiled. Her eyes sparkled. "Of course." She was as giddy as a filly. Her hooves tapped a pillow.

Screech took a deep breath. "Glitter, I hate it here. I tried making new friends, but most ponies here don't support me or understand me. I don't fit in here. Cloudsdale's culture does not match my wants or needs. I am not happy here and want to go home." Tears ran down her face. She sobbed harder than ever. "I am not right for Cloudsdale. I am phosphorus. Cloudsdale is chocolate. We don't mix. I am violent and Cloudsdale encourages violent behavior. I don't want to be violent. It makes me feel like vomiting. Like eating phosphorus covered chocolate. The ponies here don't listen to me or support me. They tell me I will get used to being unhappy. I want to go home to the ponies who love and support me. The ponies who want me to be happy."

Glitter's smile died. "I- I do want you to be happy."

Screech nodded. "I know you do."

Glitter and Screech were both silent.

Screech opened her pudding cup and licked it.

Screech looked at the ground for the first time in days. She didn't receive a single letter from any of her friends. The trudge to the post office was long and horrible. The sun was out reminding her even the stars wanted her to suffer.

Tappy smiled at Screech. "Welcome! Oh it is you. Why are you here?"

"I am here to pick up my mail," hissed Screech. "Did you shred it?"

"I hope so," said Tappy. She looked through her log. "Yes. We did."

Screech took a deep breath. She dove over the counter and tackled Tappy to the floor. She hissed, "I am the best pony I can be. I am always as good as the circumstances allow. How good do you think this situation will let me be?"

"Please don't hurt me!" cried Tappy.

"I will hurt you! If any pony ever shreds my mail again I will kill you. I don't care if you are not working that day. If I don't receive so much as one letter I will stop your heart! Do you understand?"

Tappy nodded violently.

Tears welled in Screeche's eyes. "Why would you do that to me?" she bellowed. "I need those letters!"

"I am sorry I am sorry I am sorry." Tappy shook like a wet dog.

Screech jumped back over the counter and ran away.

The worthless wall and the worthless gate around Razzle's worthless mansion were actually keeping Screech out. She took a deep breath and fought the urge to buck a hole through the wall.

Screech walked through the hole in the wall. She softly knocked on the front door. The door happened to break in half. Screech ran to Razzle's room.

Razzle jumped around to banjo music waving her pom poms wildly. "Go clowns!"

"You are okay!" yelled Screech. "The post office shredded my mail and you didn't answer the intercom. I was worried something happened to your family."

"We are fine," assured Razzle. She smiled. "Thanks for caring about me. Dad lost his job and every pony quit working for him, even Shine Finish." She sighed.

Screech put her fore-leg around Razzle. "I know I have not always been as nice as I could. To be fair their are times you are not easy to get along with. You are a good pony- if a little misguided. I am glad we are friends."

Razzle smiled ear to ear. "I liked Melodie. I wish she could have stayed. She was going to become my best friend."

Screech chuckled. "Now I am glad she is gone. I don't want her stealing you from me. Or you stealing her from me."

"I would never steal her form you. I prefer colts."

"Oh. I assumed you didn't like either."

Razzle gave Screech a probing stare. "Is that an option?"

Screech nodded.

Razzle let out a sigh that turned into laughter. "Oh, thank Cele- Luna."

"I think you should thank Cadance. It seems like her field of work."

"If I meet her I will give her a hoof shake," said Razzle.

"It feels nice opening up to you," admitted Screech.

Razzle smiled. "When you go back to Ponyville we will still be friends right?" She saw how many letters Screech wrote every day. She wanted to hear the answer anyway.

"We will be friends for life," assured Screech. "How did your dad lose his job? I thought he had more power than a lightning factory."

"You don't know? I thought you read the news."

Screech hissed at Razzle's tone. "I do. I have not been in the mood."

"Because of yo- recent events Chief Justice Requital is investigating every judge in Cloudsdale. My dad was fired for being corrupt."

Screech didn't know how to respond. She was not sorry. "I wish I did things differently."

Razzle shrugged. "Dad says she does this every twenty years. She will pick new judges, change a few laws and everything will be fine. He will be a judge again in a year."

"What about-"

"Don't worry, he will be killed. He was found guilty and sentenced to death. In a week he will be killed right after his trial."

"I hate this city." Screech took a deep breath. "I hate this city so much." Her hooved shook. "Murder is wrong. I- I can't let him die. I can't be responsible."

"You want to save him?"

"Of course not!" snapped Screech. Her throat hurt. "I am going to save him anyway."

"How? You are just one pony. You can't overturn a verdict made by the Cloudsdale legal system."

Screech scoffed. "I am Screech Stormchaser! I was born to... I will do the best I can."

A thought dawned on Razzle. "Sorry about your mail."

Screech nodded. "I talked to the mare at the post office. It will not happen again. Wait! Every twenty years? How long has Requital been Chief Justice?"

Razzle shrugged. "I don't even know what a Chief Justice is."

Screech sat outside Second's door. "How are you feeling?" she yelled.

Second didn't respond.

"I can't imagine how hard the last three days have been on you. I am sorry I could not save you sooner."

Second didn't respond.

"I wish I could fix you. I want you to feel better."

Second didn't respond.

"He didn't love you."

Something slammed against the door. "You don't know him! He loved me more than any pony will ever love you!"

"Did he tell you to kill yourself if he got caught?"

Second didn't respond.

"Was it a pact? If it was he broke it. He is still alive."

Second breathed a sigh of relief. "He is okay?"

"Sadly yes. He is not getting the death penalty either. Luna knows he deserves it." Screech sounded genuine because she was not lying.

Screech sat on Glitter's bed. She strummed her guitar playing random chords absent-mindedly.

Success used Screeche's crayons to draw a picture.

Glitter admired her son's drawing. "That looks just like your father. Second will love this."

"How did you and Papa meet?" asked Screech.

Glitter smiled. "That is a boring story. I was working as an accountant for an art gallery. He was guarding the front door. I heard he had magic fangs that could heal anything." She rubbed her burn scar. "We started talking and I liked being bitten."

Screech smiled. "I love being bitten. I love biting."

"When did you learn he was already married?" asked Success.

Screech and Glitter both winced.

"Four weeks after his accident," said Glitter.

"What made you fall in love with Papa," asked Screech.

Glitter shrugged. "To be honest I don't know. He was not charming, funny or even nice most of the time. Sometimes on rare occasions he made me feel like I was the only pony in the world who mattered. He made me feel beautiful. He wanted me to be a model. He bought me the nicest gifts."

Screech nodded. She felt relived. She felt validated.

Screech knocked lightly on the bright blue door in a small brick house a one hour canter from her house. All the houses on the street were small and close together. Children ran around and played in front of the houses.

The blue door swung open. Stitch smiled at Screech. "I am glad you could stop by."

Screech nodded. "You live in a nice neighborhood. At least by Cloudsdale's standards."

Stitch nodded. "It is fairly safe." He saw Screech into the house. "How are you doing?"

"Horribly," said Screech evenly. "Everything is awful right now. I want to vomit and cry. My desire to kill is stronger than it has been in months. It feel like I am balancing on a razor's edge and it is cutting my hooves."

"What happened?"

Screech shook her head. "How are you?"

Stitch opened his mouth. After a moment he said, "I can't complain."

Screech reached into her saddle and and took out a box of crayons. "Do you want to draw? It always makes me feel better."

Stitch smiled. "Yeah. You still use crayons?"

"Do you have a problem with crayons?" asked Screech sharply.

"Yes. I am mot a child," teased Stitch.

"I will go get you... ... I don't know what adults do for fun. Books? I think adults read. Although I have never seen an adult read."

"I saw my dad reading a book once," said Stitch. "I think it was about an actor he liked as a colt."

Screech smiled. "Adults are weird." Her smile faded. "My birthday is in three months."

"Mine is in two," mumbled Stitch. He smiled. "Lets draw."

Screech lied on a once soft carpet that was trampled until it was thin and rough. She could have sat on Stitche's bed. She could have sat at the little desk covered with half done school work. She could have sat on the pillow Glitter made her take. She chose to sit under the poster of one of the most prolific rodeo ponies in decades, Silver Tooth. She never met her late uncle but she liked being close to the poster. She liked being close to all of the dozens of pieces of rodeo memorabilia. She liked being next to his flute collection most of all.

Stitch drew a picture using all the brightest most vibrant colors. He drew suits and bow ties with measurements and notes on the fabrics he would use to make them.

Screech and Stitch made pleasant conversation for three hours. They talked about their friends, food, the weather factory and the rodeo. They did not talk about their families. Screech made two dozen drawings. Stitch made eight.

Stitch stood up and stretched his legs. "This floor is not comfortable."

"Really? I didn't notice," said Screech as she rolled her eyes.

Stitch hopped onto his bed.

Screech finished her drawing then sat beside Stitch. She wondered if the ponies of Cloudsdale would be more angry to know an unmarried colt and filly were sharing a bed, or if they knew the filly and colt were gay.

"I liked your drawings," said Stitch. "You are a lot better with crayons than I thought you could be. They are the best crayon drawings I have ever seen. They are not half as good as color pencil drawings."

"How does Cloudsdale feel about marriage?" asked Screech.

"What?" Stitch cocked his head. "Where did that come from?"

"Glitter never married Papa. I wonder if she is disappointed."

"Who is Glitter?" asked Stitch.

Screech took a deep breath. "She is my mother."

"A lot of ponies in Cloudsdale never get married."

Screech stared at her hooves.

Screech found Glitter watching gold swim in her bowl. "How are you feeling?"

Glitter groaned. "I am sorry."

"Why? Is everything alright?"

Glitter sighed. "This house is worthless. Rich ponies used to live here. When the walls started to rot, rather than fix them, they bough new houses in better neighborhoods. We moved in and pretended to be rich. I talked to a realtor today. I can't afford a house in Ponyville."

Screech was so overwhelmed she forgot to breathe. Her legs shook. "Oh. That is okay. Your memories are in this house. Buildings catch fire on the ground. You don't have to give up your home for me. I will find my own way back to Ponyville." She had no idea where this was coming from. She thought all of her plans failed.

"Screech," said Glitter firmly. "I would rather lose this house than lose you. And the more I think about my memories the more I want to forget them. This family needs a fresh start."

Screech smiled. "I will get all of us to Ponyville!"

"No Screech, I am the adult here. Don't worry. I will get a job. I will figure this out."

"Thank you Glitter." Screech trotted up to Glitter and gave her a tight hug.

Screech knocked on what remained of Razzle's front door. She could see her friend in the kitchen only a few ponies away.

Razzle rubbed her eyes. "You are early!"

"Sorry if I am too early." Screech sat at the kitchen island beside Razzle. She put her pillow on the counter. "I was wondering if you have a camera I can borrow. I want to take headshots of Glitter. She does not know it yet, but she is going to be a model."

"O- of course," Razzles voice wavered. "Mom has a few. I will ask her for one." She looked at the kitchen counter.

Screech put her hoof on Razzle's.

"I- I have bad news. It is great news, but not for you. My family is moving to Laspegasus. We leave in two weeks."

"Oh." Screech looked away. "Congratulations."

"I am sorry."

"Don't be. I am happy for you."

"Despite the name earth ponies do live there. I will finally be able to make friends." Razzle sounded like she was trying to cheer up Screech.

Screech nodded. "They are going to love you." She wiped a tear out of her eye.

Razzle took a deep breath. "Screech. I am scared. I don't want to go. You are my only friend. I don't want to lose you."

Screech hugged Razzle. Both fillies shook.

Screech trudged around her house in the early morning sunlight. Her wings flapped slowly. She could barely keep her eyes open. After eleven hours of doing laps she was still filled with uncontrollable dread. She wanted to fly. She wanted to talk to Dr. Red or her friends. She wanted to bite her own leg to fill her mouth with blood. She walked in a protective circle and hoped her panic would subside enough for her to sleep before the sun rose.

Chaste landed softly on Screeches back. It sat quietly with her.