Ponies Don't Lay Eggs

by Kassaz

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sweetie Belle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Rarity
Length: 2429

Spike shares some pie with friends, and enjoys the friendship he has with the mare he most admires.

Spike bakes a pie and visits Rarity. He hasn't visited her in a while, since his romantic hopes with her have vanished, but he recognizes she's still a friend. During his visit, he learns some things about ponies he didn't know before.

This story is part of a trade with Fancy_Blue, who wanted a cute story with Spike and Rarity. I commissioned the cover art by Jotun22.

Published 2024-04-23 23:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-11-07 23:11:27 UTC

Chapter 1

The sand of the hourglass finished piling to the bottom, letting Spike know his pie was finished baking. He slid out of his chair and walked over to the oven, swinging open the metal door. One perk of dragonhood was never needing any oven cloths to hold hot dishes, and he was even hanging out of the oven just a little as he climbed in to grab the dish, this being preferable to dragging over a stool to give him the proper height. He set the steaming pie on the floor as he snuffed out the very flame he’d breathed and closed the oven. Then he grabbed the pie and set it in the windowsill to cool. He didn’t mind hot pie, since it was far too cold to burn his mouth, but ponies always liked their pie cooled.

Standing around twiddling his claws was no way to wait, so he went to the foals’ section of the Golden Oaks Library and pulled a comic book from the shelf. He lay on the ground and started reading it.

Getting lost in his comic reading meant he waited too long, and he was running his way through Ponyville while the pie was still warm. The pie dish was covered with a cloth to keep it warm on the way. He had considered heating it up a little by breathing on it, from above or below, but he didn’t want to risk making it too hot again, or burning it. In just a few minutes, he was standing before the door of Carousel Boutique. He moved the pie dish to one set of claws to free his other, made sure the spines on his head were straight, and knocked on the door in a little rhythm.

“Coming, darling.” Her sweet voice made its way to his ear holes, and he was smiling when the door opened.

“Oh, hello Spike. Come in, come in.” She backed up from the doorway to give him a wide berth to enter. Spike noticed that she stepped backwards, rather than stepping aside like a pony normally would, because her current condition made that the easier option; she had an egg shape hanging down between her legs and bulging from her sides, and her perfect white fur colour greatly emphasized that shape.

“Oooh, and you brought pie! You know you don’t have to bring anything over to visit, Spike, but I’m certainly not complaining. Here,” she took the pie dish fully into her magical grip and had it hovering beside her, “you take a seat and I’ll prepare our plates!”

Spike didn’t know if they’d be eating in the showroom of a den, or the dining room, but she only had to step to the kitchen’s entrance to collect the utensils and plates with her magic, and he hopped on a nearby stool when she returned to the den. A short table was already set and clear near her chaise lounge, making it the ideal spot for everything, although he had to hop off and drag the stool over to it.

Rarity climbed onto her favourite seat with a grunt, needing to rotate herself after getting her forebody in-place, and she practically threw her rear up onto the lounge with a hop. She huffed, and her magic smoothed out her hair in case it needed smoothing, which it didn’t. “I’m sorry for that unlady-like display, darling. Unlike you boys, we mares get a little less mobile when we decide to have children.” Spike didn’t really have anything to say, but Rarity didn’t notice, with her attention focussed solely on the pie.

Something else she’d grabbed from the kitchen was a pie cutter, which she used to slowly and gently slice into the pie once, then twice, and then pick it up from underneath all without making any crumbs. She slid the first slice onto Spike’s plate and hovered it over to him alongside a fork and knife, which he gingerly accepted, and she repeated the process for her slice. She closed her eyes and hummed when she took the first bite. Spike wanted to ask her if she thought it was too cold, but kept his mouth shut, and then realized he should open his mouth, but for pie instead of talking.

By the time he’d halfway finished his slice, he thought it would be a good time to start talking, but not about pie. Still, Rarity spoke first.

“So, Spike, is there anything on your mind? It’s been a while since you came to visit me.” Heartbreak will do that, but he’d already left those feelings behind. She was still his friend, and he’d always cherish that magic.

“I, uh,” Spike coughed to clear his throat, “I thought you’d be lonely is all. Twilight mentioned your husband was in Canterlot on business for a few days.” That sentence seemed to end a little prematurely, but he couldn’t think of anything else to say. He was proud of himself; it was the first time he’d talked to her about her husband, and he didn’t even stutter.

“Oh yes, we’re opening a new boutique there, and he wanted to oversee some of the preparations. I wasn’t feeling my best when we were supposed to leave, so he insisted I stay.”

Spike was a little alarmed at that information, and couldn’t keep the fear out of his voice. “A-Are you okay?! What if something happened and nopony was here to help you?!”

Rarity waved a hoof at him playfully as she spoke. “Calm down, I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m not going to collapse or anything, at least not for a few more weeks. Besides, Sweetie Belle’s here to keep me company. She’s very excited to be an aunt.”

“Well, where is she now?” Spike knew pie would’ve grabbed the little unicorn’s attention by now, if she were here.

“Oh, she’s out crusading with her friends somewhere in town, but it’s fine. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to eat some more pie before it gets cold.” Spike exhaled a little at knowing the pie hadn’t been too cold already.

Rarity swallowed another forkful of pie. Spike barely noticed her belly twitch in the corner of his vision.

“The pie’s not giving you a stomach ache, is it?” Spike asked in a way that was curious, with a hint of regret, wondering if he’d used too much cinnamon and she was simply too polite to tell him; she would be.

Rarity chuckled. “No, no, he always wakes up while I’m eating. The pie’s excellent, Spikey-wikie.”

Spike beamed at the use of his favourite nickname, but that didn’t stop him from being just a little confused. “What do you mean he’s awake?”

Rarity set down her plate and fork on the table, dabbing her mouth with a napkin before she spoke. “Well, he’s not just sitting in there like a lump, at least not all the time. Foals move around in their mothers. Didn’t Twilight ever teach you about pony reproduction?”

Spike looked away, a little embarrassed; Twilight certainly tried, but none of it had stuck, despite the purple unicorn’s efforts. He managed to remember something else he’d been taught, however. “Really? Rainbow Dash told me pegasi lay eggs just like dragons; I kind of thought all ponies laid eggs.”

Rarity groaned. “Somepony needs to ruffle that mare’s feathers, tricking an innocent little dragon like that. No, darling, there’s not an egg in here.” She patted her bump for emphasis. “In fact, you can feel for yourself if you’d like.”

Spike slid out of his chair and stepped over to stand in front of her. He gently set his open palms against her. It was warm. “Be careful with your claws, Spike, you don’t want to pop me.” Spike immediately brought his claws back against his chest, fear written on his face. Rarity laughed. “Oh, I was just teasing you, Spike! Here.” She took his grabbers in her magic and set them back on her bump. “If you press in a little there, you can feel his head.”

True to her word, Spike didn’t feel anything like an eggshell; instead, it was soft, and he could feel something solid underneath her skin. He couldn’t quite tell that it was a head, but he believed her. “Shouldn’t I be able to feel his horn?” Spike wondered, aloud.

“Hmm, no, it’s just a stub right now. Besides that, there are feathers on it, and his hooves.” She continued before Spike could get even more confused. “We call the protective coating over the abrasive parts of the foal’s body “feathers,” darling. They stop the foal from doing any damage in there, and will fall off a few days after he’s born.” Spike gave an “oh” as his only response. “Here, I’ll see if I can get him to move for you.” Rarity took her left forehoof and placed it on the part of her expanded barrel closest to her front, pressing in deeply a few times; some moments later she once again took his grabbers in her magical grip and moved them to rest elsewhere. He waited, and then he felt and saw something poke out from her underneath his claws before receding. Now Spike’s only response was a “woah.”

“If you listen closely, you should be able to hear his heartbeat.” Spike turned his head to face her and rested his right ear hole against her. Neither of them spoke for a few seconds.

He heard nothing interesting at first, and plugged his other ear hole with a claw to listen in better. “Does a foal’s heartbeat sound like a rumbling noise?”

“Um, no, that was, something else.” Rarity looked flustered. Fortunately, the door could be heard opening, and they both turned to see who was barging in.

It was Sweetie Belle. Far from an unobservant filly, she immediately noticed the two different things in the room. “Hi Spike! Oooh, pie!” Rarity didn’t have an opportunity to tell Sweetie to wipe her hooves at the door before she came barrelling over to them, but she did tell her to get a plate and utensils from the kitchen. Sweetie only brought a plate. Well, eating like an Earth pony was fine, and Rarity started cutting a slice of pie for Sweetie Belle.

“So what are you doing here, Spike?” Sweetie Belle was to the point, but her attitude was cheerful as ever.

“Oh, uh, I was just checking up on Rarity and bringing over a pie, I guess.” Spike’s response trailed off a little near the end.

“Yeah, I can’t believe I’m going to have a niece soon!” Sweetie smiled, and Rarity corrected her with one word, “Nephew.”

Spike realized he’d not asked something important yet. “Hey, what’s his name?”

Rather than Rarity, Sweetie answered. “We don’t know yet, but I bet he’ll have “big” in his name, because her belly’s so big I bet he’s gonna be a huge pony like Big McIntosh!”

Rarity laughed a little, very little, in that polite way she did whenever she wanted to choke somepony and with a less obvious corresponding facial expression. “I’m certain he’s a perfectly normal size for a foal, Sweetie.” She slid the slice of pie onto Sweetie Belle’s plate, and afterwards the flat side of the pie cutter was perfectly positioned to whap her on the back of the head, but was lowered back into the pie dish instead after a few moments. “Why don’t you tell us what you three crusaders were doing today, without speaking while your mouth’s full?”

After inhaling most of her slice, she told them the story of how she did not, in fact, discover her special talent in book binding, and that Twilight Sparkle had requested Spike’s help back at the library.

After more chitchat, Spike decided he should go ahead and leave, but the conversation continued to the door.

“Thank you once again for the pie, darling. It was delicious. I’ll return the dish as soon as possible.” Rarity pulled the door open for Spike and Sweetie Belle.

“I’m glad you liked it. I don’t get too many compliments on my cooking from Twilight anymore.” Spike’s voice had the slightest hint of sadness in it as he walked outside.

“Well, let me give you some advice, darling, and you didn’t hear this from me.” Rarity leaned her head down for emphasis, and spoke a little more quietly to him. “If you stop cooking, without saying a word, those compliments will be back before you can say “dragonscales” by the day’s end.”

Spike tapped his chin with a claw. “Really? I think I’ll have to try that.”

Rarity continued. “Oh, and don’t feel like you need a special occasion to visit. Drop by whenever you want, Spike.”

“Are you sure.” Spike’s eyes rested on her belly. “I know you’ll be busier than normal soon, and I don’t want to get in the way.” Spike’s eyes rested on the ground. Rarity knew exactly what had gone unsaid, and her magic tilted his chin up so he faced her again.

“You’ll always be my favourite dragon, Spike.” Rarity lowered her head and kissed him on the forehead. Spike could only look away in glee and kick at the ground with a “shucks.”

Sweetie Belle dashed through the door, now with loaded saddlebags from her room, but Rarity stopped her before she left the property. “Oh Sweetie Belle, has it ever occurred to you to invite Spike to some of your crusading?”

“No.” Sweetie Belle shook her head and turned to Spike. “Can dragons even get cutie-marks?” Spike was fairly certain they couldn’t, and shrugged like he’d seen a dragon do in his comics. Sweetie didn’t understand his shrug, but Rarity read his face instead and understood well enough.

“Well, nevertheless, I think Spike would appreciate being included, wouldn’t you Spike?” Spike pondered for a moment more before he answered. “I guess, yeah.” He couldn’t help but smile as she smiled back at him. Sweetie was already smiling.

“Hmm. Okay! Come by Sweet Apple Acres later, Spike! We could use your help to light the fire anyway!” With that yelled, Sweetie bolted.

“Wait, Sweetie! Fire for what?!” Rarity called, but Sweetie Belle either didn’t hear her, or ignored her. Rarity sighed and shook her head with closed eyes.

“Don’t worry. I can keep them out of trouble.” Spike was fairly certain he wasn’t lying.

Author's Note

Copyright 2024 Kassaz
Verbatim copying and redistribution of this document is permitted.