Twilight Sparkle and Hard Drugs
Author's Note
This idea formed when I was bored out of my mind stocking shelves at work.
Hope you enjoy my shitpost!
Twilight Sparkle and Hard Drugs
The golden door opened, letting a certain purple Princess into the royal bedroom. She is the Princess of friendship, the goddess of magic and said goddess was late.
"I'm so sorry for being late. I was stuck in the middle of something and I didn't notice the time. I rushed here as fast as I could." The purple Princess' head hung low. She hated being late for something, especially if it included her former teacher.
"It's quite alright Twilight, you're only two minutes late." Celestia's smile remained on her face but she did note that it was quite unlike Twilight to be even a minute late. This was one more action that was added to the pile of growing worries in her mind.
If an outsider would look into this situation they wouldn't see anything amiss, a few minutes late here and there. Maybe even a paper that was submitted half a day too late. But this was Twilight, the same mare who had nearly gone insane trying to find a friendship problem to solve, just so she could send a report on it and not appear as tardy.
Not to mention the frazzled state of her hair. It was practically a birds nest, if Celestia didn't know Twilight she would have thought that she just got out of bed.
"Please, have a seat." While she took a sip of her afternoon tea, Celestia's horn glowed and the chair opposite her was pulled back, giving Twilight a seat to rest on.
Twilight barely had time to sit before Celestia spoke. "So, how have you been doing these past few weeks? I believe you've had a lot on your plate with looking after Anon."
Twilight chuckled as she magically picked up the white teacup in front of her, and poured some tea from the matching teapot. "You have no idea. I've been up practically three whole days just studying him. And there's still so much to learn."
Celestia could see the twinkle in her eyes as she continued to list off many different things she found out about the alien roommate that she picked up.
A small smile spread on her lips as she continued to listen to her former student gush about her latest findings. Pleasant memories filled her mind, taking her years back towards the days where she was teaching the young unicorn filly. She was glad that the same excitement towards learning still persisted close to her heart.
A small part of her still saw Twilight as that young filly, always eager to learn, always hanging on every word she said, as if any word she might say always had profound knowledge behind it.
It felt like years could pass but the young alicorn would always stay the same, small filly she had met all those years ago.
"...It feels like a drug." It took every bit of restraint to not spit all of her tea on her fellow alicorn. She brought a hoof up to her mouth, her cheeks slightly expanding at the pressure. A small droplet of tea leaked through and stained the underside of her pristine white hoof.
"Uhm.. Celestia?" A look of worry replaced the foalish excitement that was on her face. "Are you okay?"
Celestia eventually gained control once more and she swallowed her tea.
She then cleared her throat and set the teacup down upon the fancy table.
"Yes, everything is fine." She wasn't even sure if she heard her former student right.
"I'm sorry I must have misheard. What feels like a drug?" The worry filled face of Twilight was replaced with a huge smile. Celestia was sure that she might have seen a different kind of twinkle appear in her eyes.
"Scritches." She stated, as if she expected her to know what those were.
Celestias eyes narrowed slightly. "What are scritches?"
"Oh It's when anon-" She paused mid sentence and a thoughtful look crossed her face. "I'm actually not quite sure what he does. My mind just kind of shuts down just as he gives them to me." Twilight shrugged.
Celestia shivered. Something that could shut down a ponies mind? That sounded awfully lot like some sort of drug. Not to mention Twilight literally said that it also felt like one.
An abnormally serious look crossed Celestias face.
"Twilight. Is he giving you drugs?" Twilight's eyes widened in a mixture of fear and confusion.
"W-what? No! He's not giving me any drugs!" Twilight physically recoiled as she practically screamed. Then a deep blush overcame her cheeks as she looked over the balcony railing to see if anypony had heard her. Thankfully the royal garden was currently empty.
'With that kind of reaction it's hard to think otherwise.' Celestia thought, a sigh escaping her lips.
The air around them both was getting a bit tense, something that Celestia had experienced too much in the recent days. This was her one day off per month, she really didn't want to ruin it. She could even feel a slight headache coming along.
"So, what have the rest of your friends been up to?" She switched the conversation topic to something more pleasant.
The rest of their monthly afternoon tea passed relatively quickly, they talked about many subjects but the first topic stayed in the Princess' mind well after Twilight had left for Ponyville.
Was Twilight doing drugs? She sure hoped not. The answer she gave her didn't really help ease her mind of the matter either.
Would she really be able to fall from grace in such a manner?
That's it, she wouldn't stay stuck thinking about this. It would get her nowhere.
"I might need to give Twilight a surprise visit." Celestia mumbled before she opened the door to her room and informed the guards stationed outside that she was not to be disturbed for the rest of the day.
The golden door closed and locked behind her. Then with a flash of golden light Princess Celestia vanished from her room.
The crystal walls of Twilight Sparkle's castle were the first things to greet her eyes as she opened them after her teleportation.
The sound of hooves impacting crystal echoed out in the relatively empty hallway.
Celestias horn was surrounded in a golden glow as she cast a spell and she turned her head to the right as the information she was looking for entered her brain.
Her pace quickened, her destination was the library section of Twilight's castle.
Spotting the door slightly ajar she took a quick peek inside. Her ears both turned towards the two occupants in the room.
She could see Anon hunched over, his back towards the door, his arms seemed to be occupied with something. Celestia's brow furrowed as she saw something purple poking out from behind the human.
Her eyes widened in realisation. That was Twilight.
A chuckle emendated from the human. "You're addicted." Celestia's heart seemed to skip a beat at hearing Anons words.
Twilight sparkle. From a high achieving unicorn, then alicorn. Now turned drug addict?
From the angle she was looking at, it looked like Twilight was laying on the floor while Anon was hunched over her. Most likely doing something illegal, like feeding drugs to her.
Celestia felt her heart start pounding in her chest.
She wasn't going to stand for this! She will put an end to this vile act right this instant!
Celestia practically jumped into the room, the door loudly impacting the crystal wall, announcing her presence to the two other occupants.
"Holy shi-" Anon couldn't even finish his surprised exclamation before Celestia's voice cut him off.
"Get away from her you-" Her voice slowly got smaller until it was completely cut off. She wasn't sure what the two of them were doing, but it didn't look like he was giving drugs to Twilight.
Anon lifted both his hands off the purple mare. He would have stood up if not for the weight of a certain alicorn of friendship laying on his lap. Said alicorn was seemingly lost in a completely different world, it took a few seconds for her to realise that anons hands werent on her head anymore.
"Uhhh.... This isn't-. Ah who cares, it's exactly what it looks like." Anon tried to explain himself before he gave up.
Celestia wasn't exactly sure what it was that they were doing. "What does it look like?" Her eyebrow raised in a questioning manner.
"Pets and scritches." Anon replied, his voice devoid of emotion. "I surrender, take me to jail."
"What? Why would I do that?" Celestia was puzzled.
"Aren't pets and scritches illegal or something? That's what Twilight said." He pointed at the smaller Princess in his lap who was slightly rubbing her eyes.
Then suddenly the purple Princess jumped off of Anon and bowed low at the taller mare.
"I-I-I'm so sorry Celestia! I didn't know scritches were illegal! Please don't banish me!"
Celestia's questioning look remained, she didn't know anything about what they were talking about.
"Could somepony please tell me what these scritches are?"
"How are scritches and pats illegal if you don't even know what they are?" Anons arms fell back on to his lap.
"To my knowledge, they aren't. Where did you get that idea?" Calestia's gaze landed on the purple Princess that was still slightly shaking.
"W-well you asked if Anon was giving me drugs when I talked about scritches earlier today. A-and drugs are obviously illegal. Well, except if it's medicine. But I didn't know that scritches were drugs."
Celestia responded with a simple hum of acknowledgement.
"What?" Anon simply could not understand the logic behind that. "Was that why you were all panicked when you came back?"
Twilight responded with a sheepish smile as a deep blush overcame her.
"You do realise that scritches aren't drugs right?" Twilight gave him a sheepish smile and a shrug.
Anon sighed and facepalmed.
Celestia remembered that her mind drifted during that topic of conversation. It could be that she might have misheard her and had 'jumped the gun' as Anon had once said.
Celestia's pose visibly relaxed. As she realised that Twilight in fact wasn't doing any kind of drugs. But now she was interested in these 'scritches' that both Anon and Twilight had been talking about the whole day.
Celestia cleared her throat. "I might have misheard you earlier today, which lead me to overreact. I'm sorry about that."
Anon wiped is forehead with the back of his hand as his body visibly relaxed. "I'm glad that was just a misunderstanding."
He then leaned a bit forward so his head was next to Twilight's.
"So." Anon rubbed his hands together. "Does your mom want scritches too?"
Twilight froze, her head slowly turned to look at Anon.
"What? Was it something I said?" A clueless smile spread on Anons lips.
