I´ve changed for you, my love
Dear Chrysalis,
my name is Shining Armor. That name is surely nothing new to you. I have many things to discuss with you, which can change your negative attitude at me and my last deeds.
There were things, which couldn´t be. Nor me, neither Cadance wanted to admit them,but those things were there! Cadance is a princess of love, you surely know that. Her special talent is to spread her talent around. I like love. I live for it. And I love Cadance and I wanted to be with her forever. But nothing is, like we want.
Unpleasant facts begun to rise. Her love was weaker and weaker, because she shared it too much to her neighborhood. More she gaved to those who needed it, more was missing among us. They say, that love can make everything. It can be also created. Unfortunately, by solving problems and too big sharing meant, that we didn´t have enough time for ourselves and to create new love.
We didn´t have time for each other. I defended Princess Celestia and she travelled around Equestria. I had many solicitudes about her and my presentiments come true. On the borders she was kidnapped. I left Canterlot and started finding her. Unfortunately, I couldn´t find anything. When I came, it was almost over.
Thanks to Celestia, I managed to find her. It was really big luck. Some uncivilized tribe made a god from her. She did have to give her love more, than ever before. It started killing her, her personality, her emotions, her magic. When I found her, she looked at me and said only one word. „Please.“
That act changed all my borders and doubts. I tried to barter with leader of that tribe, but that i shouldn´t do. They prisoned me. Luckily I managed to escape and get to some sanctuary, where Candance was hold. I released her from and get her away from that cursed village.
That time I observed first signs of break up of what we have made and defended for such a long time. But it wasn´t so hot and I didn´t care about it. It was only in a little signs, different voice intonation, different words, different emotions. Now I have that sense, which I missed before.
When we arrived to Canterlot, lot of ponies watched us. We became equestrian celebrities. Everypony wanted to know, what we did and what we do now. Of course tabloids tried to find everything and give it to their articles. That made both, me and Cadance, upset. Firstly. Then, there was a huge change. Cadance started to like that.
Her special talent is to spread love and happines.But what if everypony wants love and happines, which means scandals about stars, celebrities and aristocracy. It doesn´t matter, when it won´t help anypony. When she gives to everypony that what they want, that can be tolerated. Unfortunately, she started to love that.
She begun to print newspapers, full of scandals. Of course it was only a tabloid, but other ponies read it. They liked it. They get that happines they wanted.Popularity of that tabloid rised very quickly. At the beginning Cadance looked after those scandals, then she started to devise that lies. She didn´t care, if it was true or not, but only if it was about some stars or if it was hot enough.
You cannot have enough scandals, even with this method. Cadance realized, that she, owner of the most read tabloid in all Equestria is a celebrity too. She begun to write scandal articles about herself, palace guard and me too. When I heard from one of my friends, that whole Canterlot is talking about my hygiene and my mane, it made me very upset.
Of course I didn´t care about my mane, but about Cadance. She has changed. She didn´t care, that she hurt herself. She just wanted to give love and happines. First, we only shouted at each other, then we fought and once we have almost killed each other with knifes from kitchen. Luckily I remembered somepony, who might know the solution for every situation. My young sister Twillight Sparkle.
I travelled to Ponyville. I was glad, when I heared, that she and her friends didn´t read Cadance tabloid. In Twillight´s library I couldn´t find anything similiar to this situation, so we collected information and we were determined to solve this by research and magic. Both me and Twilly were unicorns.
I told her fresh informations. Then we were going deeper and we spoke about my and Cadance wedding. We managed to defeat you and your Changelings only thanks to my and Cadance love. Now I understand why was the love so strong. All Canterlot was concentrated upon us. That is what Cadance motivated now and before.
When I repeated that scene in my mind again and again, I realized, that I have lost some very precious thing. You Chrysalis, my love. I don´t know, if my mind was controled by you, but even Twilly had to admit, that with support of Princess Celestia, it´s not so hard to create a magic shield for whole city.
It meant, that I was strong enough to fight with you and your attempts to control my mind and my thoughts. It´s certain, that if I wanted to defend myself, i would did it. I don´t know, why I didn´t do it. That time I couldn´t know, that Cadance cheats on me.
The answer is simple, for me. I realized, that the only one, who really wanted me, was you Chrysalis. You alone did really love me. I suddendly realized, that you are also the only one, who I truely loved. Even more than Cadance. She means nothing to me now.
I have to tell you the main reason, why I am writing this letter. I have written to you, that Cadance went through strong changes. It was the end of our relation. I am now changing slowly but surely to a new form of living creature. I am consumed by it, but I don´t know, if it is good or bad. But I learned how to be proud at it.
Magic has a very special power, to change ponies around. If you are strong enough to control it, nothing happens. But if you don´t use magic enough, it starts to leak and it will change you to other somepony, who you love or with whom you was in touch recently. Since I made a shield to protect Canterlot during my wedding, I didn´t use magic enough.
Yes, you are right. I have changed. My body and posibbly my soul is not like in old times. In my hooves were wholes. First my fur disappeared. Then my flesh dropped out. My wounds almost immidietly healed, but not how I imagined that. I don´t feel pain, I don´t bleed, but the whole is still there.
The wholes weren´t only at one of my hooves, but all around. My walk didn´t changed. When I ran it was faster than ever before. I was the most faster runner in all Equestria. But I wasn´t the most beautiful, like last years. My appearance was awful. I managed to hide it. At the beginning.
One day Cadance wanted some hot scandal, so she came to my bed and begun to cuddle with me. It was certain, that she want it. But when she saw my hooves, she cried, then shouted and tommorow it was in her tabloid. Unfortunately it wasn´t still the end. Once I discovered, that I have Changelings wings.
They tried to set me under arrest, but I managed to escape. We are in the end of this letter Chrysalis. But I still didn´t say the most important thing to you. Through holes in my hooves are running cockroaches. My eyes are not so beautiful like it was before. They are yellow now, and they have a different form. I can see normaly, maybe better than before, but I cannot show myself in any civilization. I am condemned to death. I have no white fur, and my armor is not so shiny as in old times. I just have some old armor, which was maybe an armor of palace guard.
Don´t blame yourself, Chrysalis. You are not the person, who shall be guilty for it. It´s me. I ruined live of one love and couldn´t save live of the other one. I am in the waste lands now. You cannot find me, but if you want, don´t do that. I am condemned to extinction. Before that, I will send you with my magic a letter and one very important sentence.
„I have changed for you, my love.“
My name is Shining Armor, but i shall be called Destroyed Life. I love you Chrysalis. I loved you, I love you and I will love you to death. Without death is no life. But it isn´t functional on the opposite. Even the magic cannot save you from sad end. Maybe not everyone. I am looking forward to to death. It´s my redemption…
