You Can Lead a Horsegirl to Water...
But Only if Her Girlfriend Approves
"Applejack, darling?"
"Hmm?"
"Can we go on the lake today?"
"And just what brought this on?"
"Well, we've been saving money for it ever since we became lovers. You know, there's one that has the most gorgeous swan boats, perfect for couples! Taking a ride is a little pricey, but I-"
"Rarity, ya do know we got a lot 'f chores t' do, right?"
"Yes, but who says we can't make a little detour?"
"Look, we don't got time fer a fancy boat ride on a lake. Gotta get th' tires rotated on this thing, go grocery shoppin', go t' William's Wares t' get some tools fer Big Mac..."
"But I wanna go on the laaaaaake!"
"Quit yer whinin', sugarcube. It's only 8:30 in the mornin'. We got plenty 'f time."
"Not with all of those silly chores you supposedly must do! Honestly, would it kill you to leave all of that stuff until tomorrow?"
"Nope. Procrastination ain't the way t' get things done. Learned that th' hard way as a little girl."
"Hmph. Some skewed priorities you have."
"Skewed priorities?"
"You've been working so hard these past few weeks, Applejack. Isn't it time for a break?"
"It's gettin' close t' harvest season. Ya know that means we got a lotta work t' do on th' farm."
"Even to the point of missing Rainboom practice sessions?"
"Well..."
"The girls have been asking about you, darling. In fact, Sunset was the one who suggested I go along with you."
"Don't be ridiculous. Ya begged t' come with me. Hands, knees, everythin'. Ah'll admit, it was a lil' unexpected..."
"Mm..."
"Aww, someone's blushin'!"
"I am not! It just...isn't one of my proudest moments. Especially since I got my new pants dirty."
"Least ah washed 'em for ya."
"Yes. That I am thankful for. I do wish that plumber would come to fix my washer..."
"Why d'ya need a plumber? Ya got a handy girlfriend right here!"
"Touche. But you're so busy. Would you really make time for me?"
"Course ah would! What's th' damage?"
"Every time I start it, it beeps as though I've stopped it when I haven't. I did have Twilight take a look at it, and she mentioned it was probably the computer inside...whatever that means."
"Uhh...computer?"
"Yes? If you'd like, I can call Twilight and-"
"No, no. Ah believe ya. But ah think this is somethin' best left t' Twilight."
"Oh."
"Hey now, don't look so disappointed. Ah'm just not...good at that kinda stuff, is all."
"Right. So anyway, about that boat ride on the lake..."
"Nice try, sugarcube, but th' answer's still no. Was your plumber talk just a distraction?"
"Absolutely not! How dare you accuse me like that! I really do have a problem with my washer!"
"Uh-huh. And Granny Smith can fly into space by just flappin' her hands."
"Don't tease! If you tease me any more, then you have to take me out onto the lake!"
"All right, all right. Truce?"
"...Fine. Truce."
"Good. Now, ah'm gonna turn on th' radio."
"Applejaaaaack..."
"Rarity, how many times do ah gotta tell ya? We ain't goin' on th' lake, and that's final!"
"But whyyyyyyy?!"
"Ah already toldja why!"
"No! Why can't you make time to hang out with your giiiiirlfriiiiend?"
"What're you talkin' about? We're hangin' out right now!"
"On the laaaaaaaake!"
"Oh, wouldja quit yer whinin'?! Ah got half a mind t' let ya out right here and now!"
"Hmm..."
"Why...why are ya pullin' out yer- oh. Oh no. You ain't doin' what ah think yer doin', are ya?"
"Yes."
"Yer gonna go on social media and tell everyone about how yer girlfriend won't take ya out on the lake."
"Yes! Because a good girlfriend would take her lover out on the lake that we have saved money for!"
"Ya do know ah'm friends with ya across every site ya visit, right? Ah'll just chime in with mah own version of th' story."
"You wouldn't dare!"
"Ah would."
"Ohhh...Applejack, why must you be so stubborn?"
"Ah ain't stubborn! Ah just know how t' prioritize. Now, since yer actin' like a toddler, ah'm gonna punish ya."
"Hm?"
"By makin' ya listen t' country music."
"No! Anything but that!"
"Too bad, sugarcube. Turnin' it to The Coyote."
"No! No! All right, I'll...I'll stop. We won't go on the lake."
"Attagirl."
"Today."
"Huh?"
"But I want to go on the lake sometime this week."
"Sometime this...don't ya think that's a lil' last-minute?"
"You're a good planner, Applejack. I'm sure you can squeeze in a romantic lake ride with your girlfriend."
"Ah...well, what about you?"
"When it comes to you, I'll always make the time."
"D'aww..."
"Oooh, I can see you blushing!"
"No ya can't!"
"Darling, bright red stands out against orange."
"...Darn it."
"Now, why don't we turn it on to The Bay?"
"Th' Bay? Ya mean that awful variety station with the self-deprecation?"
"I will admit the self-deprecation is a little much, but I enjoy variety music."
"Ah thought ya liked classical?"
"That was last year, darling. This year, variety is in. And we can listen to it when we're on the lake. This week."
"Fine, fine. But nothin' super-duper mushy."
"Well, it's not like I'm putting on dance music. We're not going on a yacht, you know."
"Uh, what're ya makin' that face fo-"
"But it wouldn't be a bad idea. Certainly better than a swan boat. Can you imagine? Having a yacht on the lake, just the two of us? Oh, it would be so romantic!"
"And just why wouldja need a big stinkin' boat for only two people? Ah was fine with th' swan boat!"
"Hm, fair point. All right then, what about this? A romantic getaway cruise. It won't be just us two, of course, but there are lots of things we can do-"
"Nah."
"Wh- first you don't like the swan boat, then you say you don't want a two-person yacht, and now you don't even want to go on a cruise ship?! Applejack, darling, I implore you to make up your mind!"
"Never said ah didn't like th' swan boat. In fact, if we're gonna go on th' lake this week, ah'd take th' swan boat."
"...Oh."
"Yeah. Ah'd call and reserve one now, if ah were you. Oh hey, wouldja look at that, there's th' auto shop!"
"Mhm. And just how long will this tire rotation take?"
"Depends on what they find."
"Wonderful."
"Hey, if no one's in th' waitin' room, ya know what that means..."
"Applejack, the last time we went here for vehicular repairs, our little PDA session nearly got us kicked out by the manager. Do you really want to run that risk again?"
"Better than doin' it in th' car when it's up in th' air."
"...Okay, fine. But fifteen minutes, tops!"
"That's mah girl."
