Retirement

by Caladis

Rating: teen
Tags: Sex, Random, Discord, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Main 6, Princess Luna, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1436

Celestia and Luna discuss retiring.

Contest Entry for the "Dialogue Only Contest"

* * *

Luna is worried about falling to darkness again and Celestia suggests retiring.

* * *

Story takes places before and during Season 9 Episode 1 and includes dialogue from the episode painsteakinly edited. Sex tag added for a single comment that might be perceived as lewd.

Published 2024-05-18 11:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-05-18 11:00:00 UTC

The Only Chapter - It's Time

“Sister… we need to speak to you.”

“Yes, Lulu? What’s wrong?”

“We fear that even with the recent intervention by Starlight Glimmer that we are falling back into darkness.”

“What can we do to stop it?”

“If we knew the answer to that question then we would fix it ourselves. We are at a loss, sister.”

“What can you tell me about how you feel? Maybe we can figure it out together. I can’t lose you again, Lulu. Please, speak with me sister.”

“We are lonely. Fixing nightmares was never a problem but there is no one awake at night to speak to. It’s like a spell, the second the sun goes down, ponies sleep. Your own student seems to have overcome that limitation but that doesn't help us. We are exhausted by our own duties and ponies still don’t seem to appreciate the services we provide. Maybe it doesn’t matter… they didn’t seem to need us the thousand years we were gone. Our return was novel, but did it make anything better? It doesn’t appear to be so from our perspective.”

“I needed you those thousand years and I missed you the whole time. You’ve been back less than 3 years… I can’t lose you again! We can we do?”

“We could spend more time together. You are the only pony that understands us. We have no friends, no lovers… only our sister. We need you as much as you claim to need us. The problem is finding the time to do so.”

“I’ve been considering that even before today. My student is a princess now and I feel like she could rule Equestria if we needed her to. Let’s retire! We can go to Silver Shoals, and we can live together in a modest estate and going swimming and have dates with the local stallions… and you wouldn’t have to stay up all night! You could live like a normal pony, and we could do everything together, and catch up on a thousand years of lost time.”

“Would that work? Do you trust your student that much, sister?”

“Pfft. If we had to, we could return to the throne in 50 years or so. The important thing would be to reconnect with each other and create a support system that would let you carry out your royal duties, as needed, without falling into darkness. I hate to admit it… but the ponies didn’t seem to need their nightmares fixed while you were gone, Faust knows I couldn’t handle it, so maybe we are wasting our time trying to please other ponies when we should be pleasing ourselves.”

“Sister! Lewd!”

“I didn’t mean it like that!”

“Then what did you mean!”

“I love you! And I want to spend more time with you! I appreciate you even if no other pony does. I’d give up this throne right this second to keep you by my side!”

“Sister… I knew that you cared so much.”

“And that’s the problem. We don’t speak as much as we should because our duties force us apart. We are literally night and day, but we are one. If I lose you again… I would join you in darkness.”

“Sister! You can’t!”

“I would… though it pains me to admit that I am simply a pony… not a goddess.”

“… How should we handle it?”

“Twilight will need time to adjust to the idea but we will summon her to the castle and announce our retirement. We will give her a little time to adjust to the idea and prepare for it, we just need to hold on until then.”

“We will try… maybe a few nights we’ll just sleep and dream our own dreams.”

“Don’t worry, Lulu. I’m sure I can get this done quickly.”

* * *

“Oh, good, we're all here!”

“So everypony got an urgent summons to the castle with no explanation?”

“Yup! I just love a good mysterious summons. What's it about? Do you think it's a surprise party? Hey, why are we running?”

“Because something could be terribly wrong! Somepony turned bad, another evil creature back for revenge.”

“Don't ya think you're being a little paranoid?”

“Why else would the princesses send scrolls in such a hurry?”

“Good point. They'd know better than to make us worry.”

“Plus, I like it when you run so fast; the walls get all blurry. Wheee!”

“Race ya!”

“Girls, thank you so much for coming.”

“What's wrong? What can we do?”

“That's just it. Nothing's wrong. Everything's perfect!”

“Did y'all call us down here just to tell us that?”

“With all due respect, Majesties, you might want to save your urgent summons for matters that are a bit more... well, urgent?”

“Well, there is more to it.

“Equestria is currently enjoying its longest period of harmony in recent years. And it's all thanks
to you, Twilight. And your friends, of course.”

“Who, us?”

“Oh, pshaw!”

“It's about time you noticed!”

“Thank you.”

“Because of your efforts, there' been less and less for us to do!”

“So, after much consideration, my sister and I have decided it is time for us to retire.”

“Breaking News! The royal princesses retiring? I have so many questions. Who'll take over? Who will run Equestria? Will it be someone tall, dark, and handsome or will it be the Lord of Chaos? Ugh. Fine, go with the obvious choice.”

“You're retiring?”

“Princesses can retire!”

“Of course we can! I, for one, am looking forward to a little R&R, maybe a trip to Silver Shoals.”

“And you want me to take your place?”

“Mm hm! With the help of your friends, of course.”

“We can't think of anypony more worthy. Over the years, we've watched you grow. You've faced task after task ...challenge after challenge...”

“Countless adversities. Yeah, yeah, we get it.”

“…And you've always prevailed.”

“Thank you, but that doesn't mean that I'm... That we're ready to do what you do!”

“Of course you are. I realize this is a lot to take in, but...”

“Nope! Makes perfect sense. We're awesome.”

“Does this mean we get all your powers? I call dibs on showing up in everypony's dreams!”

“You can't be ready to step into their horseshoes just like that.”

“Well, if the Princesses think it's time to retire, we're not a bad choice. We always have Equestria's best interests at heart.”

“That's a fair point, which should be taken into consideration when we have our roundtable discussion…”

“Well, I'm in. Darlings! We'll all need a complete wardrobe update. And I would love to pick your brain about mane maintenance. When you have a moment.”

“As long as we all have each other, I'm sure we can do it.”

“Yay!”

“Protectors of Equestria on three. One, two...”

“If you're all on board, I guess I am too.”

“Protectors of Equestria!”

“It'll be a bit of an adjustment, but I imagine the transfer of power will be a lengthy process which will give me...”

“Actually, we just need a few days to put together a little ceremony.”

“Heh heh. A few days!? But... but that's so soon! Shouldn't there be some sort of training program? That lasts weeks, no, months, if not years?”

“Everything you've gone through over the years has been a training program.”

“OK, but there's got to be a guide or a rule book?”

“Yes, I have it right here: ‘How to Rule Equestria" by Nopony McPretendsmith.”

“The Friendship Journal you wrote yourselves is a better guide than any we could provide.”

“We have the utmost confidence in you. And we hope you have the same in yourself.”

“Oh, I'm absolutely certain she does.”

“I am not confident about this at all!”

* * *

“That went well, don’t you think Lulu?”

“We don’t believe so. Discord’s antics notwithstanding, Twilight Sparkle was a nervous wreck on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Even having her friends support didn’t seem to help much.”

“Twilight might be borderline on crazy, but she is statistically the least likely to fall to darkness. That must count for something.”

“It counts for a short-term vacation or a mini retirement, but could we take back over before Equestria falls in the meantime?”

“Does it even matter? Should we rule until the end of time itself or enjoy ourselves until the fall?”

“Err… Autumn? Or the fall of civilization?”

“Does it matter… as long as I’m with you in the meantime…”

* * *

Author's Note

I didn't think I could do this but I tried anyways. Thank you for reading.