“Let me through, Twilight. I know she asked for a castle room from you.”
“Absolutely not. I’m sorry, but you need to go.”
“Oh, do I, now? Has your royal title changed without me being notified? Do you now go by ‘Princess of Friendship AND Expert On What Everyone Needs’? Or are they still taking ballots? Because I’d like to put in my vote.”
“It’s what Fluttershy needs, and that should matter to you.”
“What Fluttershy needs matters more to me than you will ever know, Celestia Jr. The problem is that, contrary to popular belief, you aren’t always right. Especially not this time.”
“Ugh. You… You know what, Discord? You know what?!? I am so disappointed in you. I… I can’t even properly describe how I feel about what you did, because this is the first time in the last ten years that you’ve taken three steps forward and two steps back. You were doing so well. Better than I ever imagined possible. You’ve made me so proud, so many times, in the last decade. But then you go and do something like this!”
“He asked for it!”
“Oh, yes, right, of course he did! He just woke up one morning and thought to himself, ‘Hmm, you know what? I love my wife, but I think I’d like to provoke the Lord of Chaos somehow. Oh, I know! I’ll cheat on her! Yes, that will really get his blood boiling! If I’m lucky, maybe he’ll even get me sent to the hospital!’”
“You know, Twilight, sarcasm really isn’t your best look. I much prefer you when you get all twitchy after several sleepless nights of studying. You’re much more amusing then. And he didn’t even get admitted to the hospital! I snapped him right back into shape.”
“Only after Fluttershy begged you to stop.”
“In my defense, I was seeing red at the time. It’s hard to notice blood when it’s the same color as everything else. I hadn’t realized it had gotten so… graphic. I haven’t had violent reactions like that since before I mastered my magic, when I only had my strength and my wits to help me survive. And that was eons ago.”
“There is nothing you can say that will make anypony think that you made a good decision in this situation. Defending yourself isn’t a luxury you have right now.”
“… I’m growing tired of this conversation, Bookhorse. I didn’t come here to talk to you. I came here for my best friend, and I’m not leaving here until I see her!”
“Then why aren’t you snapping your fingers and teleporting to her, then?”
“Enough arguing already! I told you already that I’m—huh?”
“You heard me. Why did you even bother walking through the castle entrance? You and I both know you’re perfectly capable of getting to Fluttershy via your magic. I have no magic crystal throne to absorb your magic with. So why are you bothering with me in the first place?”
“I don’t need to explain myself to you.”
“Really? Because you seemed pretty eager to explain why you neglected to notice that you were tearing Fluttershy’s husband to shreds.”
“Ex-husband.”
“Not until those divorce papers are signed, he’s not.”
“I knew he wasn’t good enough for her. No one is.”
“Which is why we both know that you didn’t hurt him for Fluttershy’s sake. I may be the Princess of Friendship, but I don’t need Cadance to know that your feelings for her go way beyond the realm of my expertise.”
“Shut up.”
“It’s one of the reasons I’ve been so proud of you in the last few years. We know you were hurting. But you respected Fluttershy’s wishes. You stood by her at the wedding with all of us. You were friendly to him for Fluttershy’s sake, even though we know you hated it. I know—”
“Shut your trap!”
“Mmph?! Mmmng!”
“You upset me, you get the muzzle!”
“Even though you know I’ll just vanish it away? Discord, what are you doing here? What are you putting off?”
“I’m doing nothing of the sort! Stop putting words into my mouth.”
“Maybe if you’d just stop and be honest with me—”
“I don’t want to be honest with you! I’m saving that for her.”
“You mean you’re choosing now to tell her how you feel? Even I know that’s not a good idea.”
“What? No! No, I—Do you really think I’m that idiotic? Her husband just cheated on her, Twilight. With Dr. Fauna, of all ponies! She’s not ready for that kind of thing. I just want to apologize to her.”
“Well, save the apology for later, Discord. I’m glad you regret what you did, but my theory is that you didn’t teleport directly to her in hopes that you could get somepony to advise you before you could reach her.”
“Oh, that’s your theory, is it, Dr. Nerd? I wanted your advice?”
“Oh, no. I think you’d take any of your friends, but I was the one Fluttershy came to for help. I’m the closest to where she is and the most reliable source right now because I heard her side first. Now you want to give me yours and hope I can give you a clearer sense of direction.”
“And why would I care if you were closest to her, if I can just teleport to her at any time?”
“Because just being in the same building as her makes you feel better, you lovesick moron.”
“’Moron’? Ooh, Twilight. Your insult game just went from rated G to PG.”
“And your level of honesty just went from novice to amateur status, since you didn’t deny your feelings. Congratulations, I’ll notify Applejack.”
“Why thank you. Now, let’s say your theory was… perhaps, just the slightest bit correct. If that were true—and it’s not, but I’m willing to indulge you—what would you say I do? And… does it even matter what I do? Or is it… Is it too late?”
“… You know, this is ironic. Usually, the more you talk, the angrier I get when I’m disappointed in you. Not this time. Do you know why?”
“Sweet Celestia. Answering things indirectly is a habit you picked up from me. But no. Why?”
“For the same reason I was so disappointed in you in the first place: because you had been doing so well the last ten years. I have never seen any creature make as much improvement as you have in that time, and that’s just a blip of a moment for you. Like you said, you’ve been around for eons. That’s an unbelievably long history of learned behaviors to change in only ten years. Do you know how terrified we all were when we found out Fluttershy finally got serious with a stallion? We were afraid you’d go ballistic on him.”
“I wanted to.”
“I know. But you didn’t. You even agreed to get to know him and do things with him—both with and without Fluttershy.”
“I hated it.”
“I know.”
“I wanted him gone.”
“I know.”
“But every time I contemplated it… I just thought back to that first Galloping Gala.”
“Treehugger.”
“Exactly. She was furious with me. I couldn’t do that again. And trust me, this was a new tier of jealousy for me because it hurt even worse.”
“And that’s when I was expecting something like this to happen, when they started a serious relationship. But you kept it back. How?”
“Spike and Big Mac were the ones to give me advice through that. Remember, they weren’t my friends yet at the time of the first Gala.”
“Ahhh. See? That’s the—”
“Magic of Friendship, yes, yes, I can see the subtitle of the show glittering beneath you now as we speak.”
“What? You know what, never mind.”
“That’s my girl.”
“Anyway, now I fully understand. Fluttershy was your only friend back when you were constantly making these huge, horrible mistakes. As your friendships got more genuine, and as they increased in number, so did the time gaps between them. But it used to be just a few mere months between incidents, and then it went to ten years! That’s an incredible jump, Discord.”
“It’s true, isn’t it? Though, keep in mind that my last, ahem, ‘huge and horrible’ mistake was impersonating Grogar to create a scenario that would help speed up your readiness to take over Equestria. That, and getting my own personal revenge on Tirek and Chrysalis. After that was over, we got a relatively peaceful ten years.”
“And Cadance’s theory was that as your feelings for Fluttershy grew stronger, so did your motivation to be better to her.”
“You and Cadance talk about my romantic feelings together? Oh. Oh no. Nonononono. That’s not happening anymore. I forbid it.”
“You realize you aren’t subtle about it at all, right?”
“I hate you.”
“I love you, too.”
“Do you think… Fluttershy notices?”
“She definitely does, but she stays with you anyway. She stays with you even if you’re in love with her, and she stays with you even though you make a ton of mistakes. But you work harder than ever to make up for it.”
“And now you’re touching my arm, so now the finale of whatever you want to tell me now approacheth.”
“I hate it when you mix modern and archaic language together, but yes. Like I said before, the reason that I believe that she will forgive you is the same reason why I’m already ready to forgive you: because you have worked so hard to be better, more than anypony I’ve ever known. You’re amazing, Discord. And honestly? Her husband broke her heart. He should have seen that coming.”
“So… It’s not too late?”
“Not even close, Discord. She will absolutely forgive you. She just hates violence, more than the average pony. More than the most model of citizens, really. And because you’ve improved so much, I don’t think she ever saw it coming from you. And even when her husband hurt her so much, you know she never wanted to see him hurt for what he did.”
“...”
“But she’ll forgive you. I know she will. I don’t know what kind of love she has for you, Discord, but she loves you. She’ll always love you. You just need to give her time. Let her come to you. But she’s too hurt and overwhelmed right now. She’s not ready. Please… just wait for her.”
“But waiting is so hard. I’m worried about her.”
“I am too. We all are. But you don’t have to wait and worry alone.”
“So you really have already…?”
“I forgive you, Discord. You’re always my friend.”
“…”
“And I would love if you joined Spike and me for dinner. Fluttershy ate already, so I know she isn’t coming down. We can make dinner really small so we have room for the gigantic dessert cart.”
“I would like that, Twilight. I would like that very much.”
“Good. Because I like eating with morons.”
“Haha, it just so happens I like eating with nerds.”
“Ah, but can I teleport to the dining room faster than a moron?”
“Oh, bring it on, nerd. Bring it on.”
Author's Note
Should this be rated teen for implied violence/blood?
Dialogue really is the most fun part. Can you blame me for wanting to take part in this contest? It's literally the perfect excuse to write only the most fun part.
So OF COURSE I chose Twilight! Twilight and Discord strengthening their bond by insulting each other is my JAM, baby!
But I still tortured my OTP in the process because I have a problem... (Listen, shipping is my sole motivation to write fanfic, I will never deny this fact about myself.)
I didn't hyper-edit this too much, so hopefully it reads easily enough and the vibe doesn't bounce from serious to silly too much. I could have really worked much harder on this if I had wanted to but I still hope it passes enough in quality. Thanks for taking a gander at this dumb lil' entry.
