Ponies Row

by Lil_Miss_Rarity

Rating: mature
Tags: Alternate Universe, Crossover
Length: 3467

Equestria is split and each section has a criminal gang. Which will dominate the rest?

As Equestria is pulled apart from countless civil wars, rebellions, and invasions, the once-great country has split into six different sections. Aachen, Habi, Rafai, Kabala, Dabo, and Paama. Each with their own criminal organization, or "gang". Each gang is led by one of the Mane 6. Rarity leading the Horde, known for their incredible skill at turning junk into weapons. Pinkie Pie leading the Party Gang, known for their skills for trap setting, but most ponies refer to them as the "Party Demons". Applejack leads the Lying Vigilantes, known for their treasons after negotiating treaties. Rainbow Dash leads the Soaring Force, known for their air raids and heavy offensive attacks. Fluttershy leads the Black Bullets, known for their stealth and assassination skills. And Twilight leads the most feared gang of all, the Harmony Knights, known for their power and skill in battle. The Harmony Knights have just added their newest member, Rapid Fire, a trigger-happy unicorn with precise shots. The six gang fight tirelessly for dominance over all six sections of Equestria. Which will succeed?

A crossover story of the shooter game, Saint's Row, made by Volition Inc. Rated mature for mild sexual scenes and themes, strong language, and blood. Cover image by PIZZAKING92

Edit: 11-11-12: Special thanks to my good friend Cornlover for pre reading this! Changed to 1st-person. Publishing too many books, halting production of this book until my other book is done.

Edit: 3-19-13: Finally, after a long absence, I have finally got off my lazy ass and decided to finish this story. My story writing skills have improved as well, so expect better chapters.
-Keep on laughing :)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-11-14 11:23:57 UTC

First Impressions

"So, Mister, Rapid Fire, is it?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"What are you good at?"

"Well, like my name implies, I'm good at shooting. The only one I suck at is sniping."

"Interesting. However, we are short on spots for infantry men. We need ponies like strategists or carpet bombers. Go home and we will give you a call tomorrow. We'll find a spot for you if we can."

"Alright."

I headed home to my somehow standing apartment just outside of Dabo. The floors creaked with every step I took. Pipes, coming out of the walls, made it difficult for me to maneuver around the house. And the bed is cheap and very breakable. I've tried everything to keep the bed up, and I say that I've done a pretty straight forward job so far. It is already past midnight, and I couldn't sleep, so I decided to take a walk. Knowing the barbaric nature of the city's inhabitants, I grabbed my pistol and I stuffed it in my pocket, just in case. Sometimes, the gangs tend to invade the other sectors. Can't be too careful here.

Outside...

It was unusually quiet outside tonight. There were no ponies digging through the trash cans, there were no prostitutes roaming the streets for their next big buck, and there were no gang members guarding the buildings.

"Strange..." I thought.

Then suddenly, I saw Twilight Sparkle, leader of the Harmony Knights.

"What's she doing out here?"

She walked behind an alleyway. I followed her, making sure not to get caught int he process. She pulled out a cigaret and began to smoke it. Then, some other gang member poped out of nowhere and ambushed her. He was wearing a mask of white sweaters that covered most of his face. The only thing that was visible were his eyes, but just barely, as his goggles proved it difficult to see through.They looked like they were part of the Horde. A unicorn named "Rarity" leads them. Their gang rules the Aachen Sector. One of the ponies took out their knife and charged at the outnumbered unicorn. Twilight quickly reacted and dodged the attack, quickly countered the strike with a kick. The blow struck the attacker right in the gut. He fell to the ground in pain. The other three attempted to attack, only to be countered as well.

More poped out. This time, they caught her by surprise. One of them grabbed her by her shoulders. She was trapped. I knew what I had to do. I took out my M74 Eagle pistol I stole from a police pony a few years back, and checked the mag. I had 16 shots, one for everypony's head. I loaded up the gun, pulled back the slide, and aimed at the gang member, who was about to shoot Twilight in the head. Right on target. He fell to the ground, blood coming out on the side of his head. All the ponies turned toward me. I fired again, striking another pony in the chest. He dropped his gun. It fired as it hit the floor, hitting someone else in the back.

By that time, Twilight was free. She brought out her custom D41 Muskrat submachine gun, the rarest and most powerful submachine gun in Dabo, outfitted with a ACOG assault rifle scope, suppressor, purple camo with her cutie mark painted on the stock, and a laser sight, and aimed, but when I saw that she was about to join the fight, I gestured for her to stop. She hesitated for a second, then she stopped and backed off.

I fired once more, again successfully hitting someone. The rest were too close for me to use my gun. I stuffed pistol pistol in my saddlebag and used my magic to grab two of the attackers. The others began to fire their weapons. I used the two attackers as a meat shield and began to walk closer to the others. When I was close enough, I bashed them with the bodies. All of them were knocked out except for one. I again brought out my pistol and aimed at his head. He looked up.

"Tell Lil' Miss Rarity that the Harmony Knights are bringing the fight to her."

I unleashed the fury of metal onto him. His head dropped to the floor, blood followed shortly after.

Twilight walked towards me, stepping over the bodies as she went.

"You aren't half bad."

"Thanks."

"I owe you my life. If there's anything you need, just let me know."

"Actually, ma'am. There is one thing..."

"What is it? And if you want to have sex with me, the answer is no."

"No no no. I don't want to do that. I wanted to join the Harmony Knights."

"Well, you have impressive shooting skills. And you seem to know how to control your magic very well. Yes. I think you would be a great addition to the gang. Come with me."

"Ok."

Me and Twilight began heading to the Harmony Knight's base. On the way there, I began to smell something. I elbowed Twilight, while not trying to look rude.

"You smell that? It smells like... Smoke?"

"Yeah. I smell that too. It's coming from the crib!"

Twilight and I dashed towards the origin of the aroma of burning wood, bricks, and metal. Instead of arriving at a gang hangout, we arrive at a site of flames. Twilight fell to her knees.

"We spent years on that hangout... All for nothing..."

"I'm sorry, ma'am..."

"Please... Just call me Twilight..."

"Ok... Twilight... What are we going to do?"

"I don't know... I can't think straight right now..."

Twilight wrapped her hooves around me. I began to blush. I wanted to help her. But how? Then, I came up with an almost insane idea.

"Hey... How about we get the gang back up and running again?"

"You mean... Recruit new gang members?"

"Yeah."

"You're crazy."

"Always will be."

*giggle* "Well, where are we going to start?"

"First, we need to place to stay. You can stay at my place until we find a new one."

"Sounds good." and then we set off for my home. Yes, the crumbling slab of stone.

Recruitment

Twilight and I entered my home of creaking floors, dangerous pipes, and (almost) broken bed. There were posters of the Harmony Knights laid out all over the walls. There was occasional guns lying around the house too. What? I like guns too.

"Sorry about the mess. Didn't know that tonight I would end up saving your ass."

"It's fine."

"So, what are we gonna do next? We gonna make our next move? Or do we relax for a bit?"

"I think kicking back isn't such a bad idea."

"Well, I'm off to bed. Please, don't look under the 2nd drawer in my bathroom."

...

"Please... Help yourself to the fridge..."

"Um... Thanks?"

My bed seemed more comfortable then normal that night. But I still couldn't sleep. I flipped through my phone and called a few friends. Some of my friends were former gang members of a large gang known as the "Shadow Bolts" The gang was made entirely of pegasai and was the only gang where the members had to wear uniforms. Many of the ponies confused us with either being part of a army or not existing all together. They all thought they were just an illusion made by Luna, the sister of the last ruler of the untied Equestria. They were disbanded after their defeat against the Wonderbolts, a highly trained performance group in the Royal Equestrian Air Force.

They would make decent lieutenants in the Harmony Knights, assuming they agreed to the terms of being a Harmony Knight. I called them. After a few minutes, they agreed to meet me tomorrow and try out to become a member. I headed downstairs to tell Twilight. She was on the sofa, watching late-night talk shows. Surprisingly, she didn't look like she dug through the "stash" I had in the bathroom.

"Hey. Mind if I join you?"

"Huh? Oh, sure."

"I found some ponies that are willing to join."

"Really? That's great!"

"They're meeting us tomorrow at the sector's dump."

"Sweet."

Twilight and I quietly watched some TV until she fell asleep, leaning on my shoulder. I stroked her mane and she breathed a sigh of relief. Soon afterward, I got up and turned the TV off. I gently put Twilight's head down on a pillow and placed a blanket around her. Hard to believe she's the leader of a gang. I headed off to bed again. This time, I could sleep.

The next day...

I woke up refreshed and ready for the meeting. Twilight was still asleep on the couch when I got downstairs. I decided to have some fun and I used my Eagles to wake her up. I fired at the ceiling. She woke up with a start.

"Son of a bitch!"

She turned around and looked at me. Her glare was enough to kill a pony. I immediately regretted waking her up. Luckily, the phone rang, which basically saved my life.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Rapid! You're late! Wear the hell are you?"

I looked at the clock. It was past 11, an hour after the meeting time.

"Shit! Twilight! We got to go!"

"Fine." said a grumpy and tired Twilight.

After Twilight finished, we went outside.

A few minutes into walking, Twilight asked me, "What do you plan on doing to see if your friends are fit to become Harmony Knights?"

I replied, "They'll go through a series of tests. The first will be shooting, the most needed skill of any gang member. Next is strategy. They will find out a way to sneak around a defense turrent I managed to steal a long time ago. It's pretty outdated, but it's still effective. The last is a gunfight. Against me. 2 v. 1"

Twilight's expression changes. "What!? Won't you get killed?"

"No, no, no. We're using dummy rounds. Of course it'll hurt, but they should be able to handle it if they want to join."

"I guess..."

"Wait a minute. 'Won't 'I' get killed?' What's that supposed to mean!?"

Twilight began to run away, laughing. I chased after her. I saw her run into the dump. Upon arriving, I saw my friends, waiting to get started. But I didn't see Twilight anywhere. Then, out of nowhere, somepony jumped on top of me! I struggled to get the ambusher off my shoulders. I grabbed his hooves and threw him on the ground. It turned out to be Twilight.

"Twilight!? What the hell are you doing!?"

"You ever heard of fun? Jeez... Ow, my back."

After that, I introduced Twilight to my friends. I hoofbump a few of them, then told them what they had to do. The first test was target practice. There were eight ponies waiting and there were six targets that will be coming from the ground. The first six to hit the knock out the targets get to round two. The two ponies who didn't hit the targets wouldn't become lieutenants. But I still let them join, just at a lower rank.

The targets were shot almost as fast as the targets popped out. Water Horse and Tail Twirl didn't make it. After round two, four targets popped out instead of six. Gun Washer and Sword Swing failed to hit the targets in time. Next was the strategy part of the test. I walked into the middle of the field and seted up the turrent and poured in dummy rounds. The turrent made a beeping noise and, just like that, the turrent scanned the horizon for enemies. I signaled the last four ponies to begin.

Nothing happened for a few seconds, then, one of them came out with a rusty S.R.S (Stonewall Riot Shield) that he found in the contents of the trash piles. Riots shields were made before the Rebellion of the Last Kingdom. Soliders realized how dangerous a riot can be, so they made these for the riot control officers. The Rebellion of the Last Kingdom was the last riot that occurred before Equestria split, which is why it has "Last Kingdom" at the end.

The turrent acknowledged the target and whirred up the barrel, preparing to fire. Then, another pony poped out of the shield's cover and threw a rock, which jammed the barrel, making the turrent utterly useless. The four ponies were victorious. But as they walked away, the rock fell out, and the turrent locked onto them and fired. Two were hit from behind. The other two ran behind a pile of junk. The turrent suddenly stopped, then fired again. A bullet fell next to one of the ponies. He picked it up and looked at it. His eyes grew wide with fear.

Twilight and I were watching the test from above, when we noticed that the two were starting to panic. I brought out the radio and begin to talk into it.

"What's going on over there?"

"The turrent switched to real bullets!! What the hell!?"

Suddenly, Slicer screamed into the radio.

"AH! I'm hit! My hoof's bleeding like crazy!"

"WHAT!?"

Twilight notices that I was, at that point, shouting into the radio.

"What's wrong?"

"The turrent switched to real bullets!"

"What are we going to do?"

I brought out a CE15-STAG rocket launcher and aimed at the turrent.

"What I do best."

I fired. The missile exploded next to the turrent. The blast pushed the turrent on its side. On impact, the turrent broke.

The radio picked up a voice.

"Thanks, Rapid."

"No problem. Ready for the next challenge?"

"You bet."

"Head to the center."

"On our way."

The Dump Center...

Me, Twilight, Chains, and Slicer met up at the Center of the dump. As a fair chance, I gave Chains and Slicer two PB93 submachine guns, the quickest firing submachine gun in the entire country, with a bullet speed of 1200-1500 rpm. While I took the weakest and least popular pistol, the AN65 Heron, manufactured by Khar. Me and the two recruits headed to the opposite ends of the dump as Twilight brought out a timer.

"The test will start in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... GO!"

New Home

Me, Chains, and Slicer all ran for cover. For a second, it was quiet. Everypony was making a plan on what to do. It remained quiet, until my enhanced hearing picked up hoof steps coming from over my cover spot. I got up out from cover and pointed my pistol. It was Chains. He had his hoofs up. His submachine gun fell to the floor. I pulled back the hammer of the pistol and prepared the gun to fire. But he punched the pistol out of my hoof before I could do anything. He tried to punch me in the stomach, but I blocked and kicked him across the face, knocking him out cold instantly.

I didn't hear anything again. But I knew that Slicer was still out there somewhere. I traveled down the paths that were not blocked off by garbage. I was heavily relying on my hearing to help myself get through. But I couldn't rely too much on it. You'll never know if I'll lose my hearing or some other twisted fantasy. And besides, Slicer was a pegasus. I don't think he'll be walking, especially in a situation like this. But then, I had an idea. I couldn't hear Slicer, but I knew him well enough to know that he never makes a second thought. I took out the clip of my pistol, placed it on the ground, and then went into the open. I then heard flapping wings behind me, then a click. I turned around to see Slicer, holding my pistol, aiming at my head.

"Don't bother, Slicer. Gun's empty." and I held out the pistol's ammo clip.

Slicer handed the pistol back and I inserted the clip and pulled back the slide.

"I am impressed, Slicer."

"Thanks."

"Welcome aboard." then I shook his hoof. I got some blood on it.

But even with the new second-in-command and the lieutenants and new recruits, I knew it still won't be enough to form a strong enough gang to fight anything. And returning the Harmony Knights to their former glory is going to be one hell of a challenge. But for right now, a home must be found for the new gang to use as our crib for the time being. Twilight was resting and calling somepony on my phone. I entered the room.

"Hey, Twilight. Is this a bad time?"

Twilight blocked the receiver with her hoof and looked up from the phone.

"Oh, no. Go ahead, sit down."

I sat next to Twilight, who continued to talk on the phone.

"Yes, I know. I'm glad to hear that you are ok. Thanks. Yeah. Our crib caught on fire. Yep, killed everypony inside. Tragic, I know, but we're getting the gang back together. I love you. Bye." then she hung up.

"Who was that?"

"My older brother, Shining Armor."

"Oh. Wait, isn't he the captain of the royal guard?"

"Former."

"Ah. Ok."

"So what's up?"

"We need to find a new hideout for our gang. It doesn't need to be anything huge right now, since we don't have a lot of members at the moment."

Me and Twilight looked at the other members, who was messing around with the guns. One accidentally forgot to switch the safety on and almost shot himself. He quickly dropped the gun and ran away. I slapped my forehead.

"You have anyway we can travel around the sector? We need to find a new place soon."

"I agree. But I don't have anything to travel with. And I don't have a lot of money or ammo, so we better conserve it."

"Guess we're walking. Slicer!"

Slicer ran over to me.

"Yeah?"

"You're in charge until we get back."

"Where you going?"

"We're looking for a new place. This place just won't do."

I heard a voice coming from the bathroom.

"Hey, boss! What the hell is this?"

He must of found my "stache".

"Uh..."

Twilight looked at me.

"Just leave it in there! And for the love of Celestia, put that back when you're done, alright!?"

"Ok!"

I noticed that Twilight was still staring at me. I awkwardly looked away.

"What are you hiding?"

"What? Me? Hiding? That's not possible. It's nothing!"

She gave me that look again.

"Look, let's just forget about it and find a new place, ok?"

"Fine."

The Housing District, Dabo

There was a million buildings in the Housing District, but not really a lot were impressive in my opinion. Or big enough. Not to mention the price. Jeez. Talk about expensive.

"I don't think we'll ever find any houses good enough."

Twilight gave a sly smile.

"Who said we needed to look for a house?"

"Excuse me?"

The Friendship Express Train Station, Transportation District, Dabo (Status: Abandoned)

"What do you think?"

There was spray-paintings all over the walls, windows were boarded up, glass shards were covering the entire floor, grass and weed was taking over the ground, and everything wooden looked as if it were about to give out. I gave my honest opinion.

"It's straight down a complete shit hole."

"Exactly. No pony will expect here to be a gang hideout. And, the best part is, it's free!"

"I guess you're right. All we need are some sofas and TVs. Maybe a few stripper poles here and there?"

"Can't argue with that."

"I'll call the boys."

"You do that."

About 10 minutes later, everypony was there, carrying everything from my home into the new one. After seeing the small amount of stuff being brought in, I needed another talk with Twilight.

"Hey, Twi! I need to talk to you for a minute!"

She was modifying her D41 when I came into the ticket booth. She lifted up her goggles and looked at me. "What's up?"

"We need some more stuff. Compared to the other gangs, we look like fucking fillies. I can't stand looking like that, Twi."

"Relax, Rapid. I got this. Listen, in a few hours, a Soaring Force shipment is arriving near the outskirts of Kabala."

"What kind of stuff are they shippin'?"

"Mostly weapons."

"Good enough for me. Let's go."

I got up and walked out. Twilight soon followed. "You don't honestly think it's going to be that easy? That you can just waltz in there, kill every last one of them, and steal their shipment of weapons just like that?"

I stopped and looked back at Twilight, who has her hooves at her hips.

"I've got a lot to teach you." said Twilight in a mocking voice.