Love After Passing

by Timey-Wimey

Love After Passing

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The pearl white mare was standing in her room, head bowed. Her ivory horn started glowing, casting a soft light on her cotton candy purple and pink mane. From behind her, a small knife levitated and she brought it forwards. Her head lifted and a tear streaked face, fur matted with saltwater drops and pale green eyes full of pain. Memories flooded her tortured mind and she lifted the knife to her throat, feeling it brush against the downy soft fur.

One month. It seemed like it had been one day. They had found her friend, an orange coated, magenta maned, violet eyed pegasus that went by the name of Scootaloo. Her broken body had been found in Ghastly Gorge, by the keen eye of the pegasus known as Rainbow Dash. Blood, bite marks, torn throat. That was all they needed to see to know that a Quarray Eel had gotten to her.

The sight was horrible. Sweetie Belle had broken down, tears flowed like rivers, her legs collapsed like crumpling paper. She just couldn't bear the sight of the mangled mare in front of her, it made her want to be sick. She had vomited, the sight of all the blood and those distant eyes swirling in her head like a whirlpool, sucking her into a dark ocean of pain and loneliness. It was useless to struggle against the current as her mind swept her into a torrent of pain and misery.

She let the knife drop and felt a small cut open up on her hoof. She winced as blood trickled sluggishly from it, but she ignored it. She took a discarded piece of paper, levitated a pencil and began to scratch out a note when her sister came into her room. The sight of her bleeding body would be hard for her, but she should know why exactly Sweetie Belle had committed suicide.

Dear Rarity,

Where to begin. Since Scootaloo's passing, I haven't been able to sleep. Nightmares haunt my every sleeping moment, it's torture. Scootaloo can't seem to leave my mind, I see only one way to free myself from this.

You'll know when you see me, but here's the honest truth. I'm going to kill myself.

I know that you'll say it just wasn't right. I know that you'll say that I shouldn't have done it. But before you say anything, just read this.

I love you, I love all the friends I've made and all the kind ponies here. I just cant handle the agony anymore. Imagine living with the haunting thoughts of your best friend's death, seeing her mangled corpse over and over again. Hearing her scream your name as nature's cruelty snatches her away.

Please don't cry. I'm in a better place now.

Tell everypony that I went for a walk in the forest and was attacked by a Manticore. Don't you dare tell anyone that I killed myself, I'll haunt you for life.

All my love,

Sweetie Belle.

Sweetie Belle placed the note on her dresser. She flicked on the light and noticed that through some of the blood drops from her hoof she could see letters on the other side. Curious, she flipped it over and noticed that very familiar writing was on it. Her eyes brightened and she read over the letter, needing to know what was written on it.

Her eyes started brightening as she read on. The dull flicker of a dying candle that her eyes imitated turned into the bright glow of a thousand suns. Her lips quivered and a smile forced its way onto her face, starting as a small grin but spreading into something that would make even Pinkie Pie proud. She placed the letter down and started crying tears of joy.

Dear Sweetie Belle,

You've probably figured that it's Scootaloo. Well if you haven't, it's me. Anyways, today's the day I go to Ghastly Gorge for that trick I told you about, you know the one where I fly whole riding my scooter in midair? Well I'm going to do that today, even though you guys suggested not to. I know it's dangerous, but I need to at least try.

Well, if I never come back... Sorry that sounded a bit too dark. If something happens, I need you to know something. I can't hide the truth any longer Sweetie Belle, I hid it during the most of our friendship, but now I want it to come out.

I love you Sweetie Belle.

I know it's weird, I know that you might not wanna look at it but it's true. I love you. I've had a crush on you since just after we started crusading. I can't live without you Sweetie Belle, I want you by my side forever. I want to earn my cutie mark with you, I want to save your life and make you smile. I want to be your shoulder to cry on, your light in the dark, your water in the desert, Celestia damnit, now I'm all mushy.

Please don't hate me. You have no idea how hard admitting that I'm into mares is. I'd do anything for you Sweetie Belle, but I just can't bear it when I see anger in your eyes. I can't stand to see it anywhere, I can't imagine seeing it directed at me. Please Sweetie Belle, don't hate me. Don't destroy my friendship with you, I wouldn't be able to take the heartbreak.

But yeah... I guess this taught me never to be afraid. Even if life throws bricks at you, heal yourself up and keep on going. After I was abandoned, I shut any negativity from my mind to keep going strong. I know my parents would've loved that. But even if they're gone I've still lived a great life. All this taught me to keep strong and not to end it all before I got to experience true joy.

That's all for now,

Love,

Scootaloo.

Sweetie Belle felt the tears rush down her face. She caressed the note to her chest and let them fall, but joy swirled in their watery depths as they hit her fur. She started laughing and let the sobs fill the air in her room.

This had taught her a lesson. She looked up with tear-filled eyes. Scootaloo was right. She shouldn't end her life just because her friend had died. She should look forward to the joy that was going to come.

But she looked at the note and a fresh wave of pain shook her. "I'll never for get you Scootaloo. It's so hard not to cry, but I'll be strong. I'll be strong just for you." Her voice was trembling as fresh tears swirled down her cheeks. She smiled again and held the note out, looking at it.

"I love you too Scootaloo."