Mandatory Motherhood: Short Stories

Poison Joke

Chris studied the picture of a blue flower that Colgate had given her with intrigue. “Poison joke she says.”

Archie looked at the flower from his perch and squawked. “Seems like something that was made, raw. To purposely cause chaos and mayhem, rawk.”

Chris hmmmed to herself. “Do you think this chaos could be repurposed?”

Archie looked between Chris and the picture, twisting his head to the side and scratching his chin. “No… Yes… hoohoo! Maybe? Would require a method to safely handle the flower rawk. Then safely break down and discover what makes them work.”

Chris looked excited. “Do you think we could use this to make me male again? Or how about to turn us back into humans?”

Archie stared at the image for a long while before squawking and fluttering his wings. “Hmm… rawk. Theoretically it maybe possible, if what Colgate said about it its ability to radically change a creature that touches it.” This caused Chris to smile and cheer until Archie screamed at Chris.

Archie raises two talons on one claw and motions to his head “Two things would hinder us to study and test bwak. method to safely study the plant and the fact that to my knowledge, no flower on our planet looks like this, hoohoo.”

Chris sighed. “I guess it is a bust unless a pony from the place Colgate came from brings one of these flowers with them...” She thought for a moment before looking down the hallways towards the bedroom. “You don’t suppose Colgate has one or the seeds for them do you?”

“Don’t be dumb.” Archie whistled after throwing an empty paper cup onto Chris’s horn annoying her. “Colgate said these flowers are a menace to ponies awk. Only one who is either out of their mind or has some sort of nefarious rawk scheme would bring them over.”

Chris levitated the cup from her horn and refilled it with water before lifting it back to Archie in his cubby hole. “Wouldn’t hurt to ask would it? What if its joke turns us back to humans?”

Archie rolled his eyes and sighed as best as his parrot body allowed. “Yes, it could have the potential to turn us into humans, woohoo.” He paused for a moment letting Chris smile before continuing. “And then we die from magic overload poisoning because our bodies couldn’t handle it, rawk.”

Chris cringed. “I forgot that part, I guess whatever rules it follows that thinks things are funny could make our human bodies the same before we transformed so we couldn’t handle the massive increase in magic the event brought”
Archie whistled before chiming in. “We could also turn into anthropomorphic versions of the creatures we currently are. Or maybe we could be turned into fish, or furniture, or become horribly disfigured. Raw!”

Chris covered her ears with her hooves and cringed. “Alright, alright. I get it. It is too dangerous to use without safety measures and we are very unlikely to find any in our world. Happy?”

Archie fluttered his wings and puffed out his chest. “You are learning, Yes. RAWK!”