If Mario was in... My Little Pony

by Some Random Fella

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Mario, Twilight Sparkle, Random, Crossover, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 2826

An idiot joins Twilight's mind

After two very convenient magical mishaps in different worlds, twilight must share her body with a certain idiotic, weirdly powerful Italian plumber.

Note: Yes.

(My first, and hopefully not last Mario crossover)
(Smg4 btw)

Published 2024-06-22 08:40:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-06-22 21:11:37 UTC

Chapter 1

"really twilight? Your gonna try to cast another dangerous spell?" Spike asked from his seat.

"Of course not! Besides, this spell isn't even dangerous" the lavender alicorn replied.

"Well, what's it do?"

"If I do it right, hypothetically, it should summon a being who would automatically be my friend!"

"I don't know, that sounds pretty dangerous to me"

"Don't worry about it spike, it'll be fine!"

"If you say so" spike said as he got off from his seat.

Currently, they were at twilights castle, she had nothing to do, so she decided on trying a spell she found in some random book she got!

Cuz why not?

"Where did you even find this spell?" Spike asked.

"It was in this book" twilight replied as she handed spike said book.

Big book o' da internet cheats

"And where'd you get the book?"

"It was actually at the front door this morning, I guess it was a gift from the princess, since I don't recognize most of the spells in there"

Spike decided to open the book and flip through some of its pages.

How to meme.

How to get a billion views.

How to delete your search history.

...

"Are these actually spells?" Spike asked as he flipped through more pages.

How to know if the FBI is spying on you.

How to apologize to the FBI for assuming such a thing.

"I think so" Twilight replied.

"And where does it even have one to summon a friend for somebody?"

"Page seventy two"

How to summon a friend.

Step one: Copy.

Step two: Paste.

...

"Are you sure these are spells? They don't really have the instructions that usually come with them" asked spike as he closed the book.

"I think that's maybe the point, I guess now that I'm a princess, I'll need to be able to cast spells with fewer and less direct instructions"

"Whatever you say, your the boss" Spike shrugged as he started to head for the exit of the room they were in.

"Hopefully your spell works, but, I'm gonna head to bed"

"Ok, good night spike!" Twilight said as spike left the room.

"Alright, let's get started, copy... Paste..."

Meanwhile, Somewhere in the mushroom kingdom...

"God dammit Mario! I told you to watch the road! Now we're stranded!" Smg4 screamed at mario.

Smg4, or, super mario glitchy four, was a man who made YouTube videos and memed for a living.

He was a bit short, had a mostouche, wore brown shoes, white overalls and gloves, and a blue undershirt and cap.

"Don't worry! Mario's gonna fix the cart!" Mario replied as he reached into his pockets and pulled out a wrench and started banging at the wrecked vehicle.

Mario was practically an exact copy of smg4, down to the moustache, but, he wore blue overalls, and a red undershirt and cap.

"That isn't gonna work! Here, let me try" smg4 said as he pulled out a hammer from his pocket and started going to town on the cart.

The two were currently stuck in a desert, since mario had crashed the cart they were riding.

...

After a few moments of just mindlessly hitting the cart, the duo gave up.

"I don't think this is working"

"Shit!"

"What are we gonna do?! We're stranded and there isn't anything from miles!"

"Ah, piss"

...

"Were all gonna die!!!"

Unbeknownst to the duo, a third individual was watching them from afar.

"Ha! I knew it was a good idea to follow them! Now I have them right where I want them!" screamed smg3 as he hopped into a clown car.

Smg3, or, super Mario glitchy three, was smg4's self proclaimed arch nemesis, as he regularly stole video ideas from smg4.

Again, he was practically an exact copy of smg4 and Mario, but with black overalls and dark blue undershirt and cap.

And now, he was going to attempt to finally defeat smg4 and become the superior YouTuber.

"I can't die! I'm too funny to die!" smg4 cried as he bawled his eyes out.

Mario wasn't listening, as he was busy eating a plate of spaghetti.

"What up biacth!!" screamed smg3 as he approached them.

"Huh?"

"Oh c'mon! First we get stranded and now we have to deal with you?!"

"Yes! And now, I'm gonna kill you! Because... I want to! So prepare your anus" Smg3 said as he hopped off the clown car and pulled out a shotgun.

"Oh hell no! Mario! Let's kick his ass!" smg4 screamed as he pulled out a pistol.

"You got it fam!" Mario screamed as he pulled out a rock from his pocket and threw it to the ground.

"Take a dis!"

The rock had a face drawn on it, a little wizards hat and a little wand.

...

"Oh my fuckin God"

"What is that?"

"It's my pet rock!"

...

"I- is it supposed to do something?"

"Uhh"

As Mario said that though, the rock suddenly began to shake.

"Ooga bala!" The rock exclaimed as it shot a ball of energy from its wand.

The energy ball suddenly turned into a portal, Wich began sucking the three men in.

"Oh shit"

...

"Waaaaa!!!" Mario screamed as he was sucked into the portal.

"Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shiiiit!" smg3 screamed as he too was sucked into the portal.

"Noo! I still have so many memes to maaaaake!" smg4 screamed as he held onto the totaled cart for dear life.

But eventually, his grip let up, and he let go.

"Shiiiit!!"

As the trio fell through what they assumed was a wormhole, they did the only feasible thing they could in such a situation.

They began to argue.

"Fat ass! Where the hell did you get that rock?!"

"Aah! It just fell on me!"

"What!? What is that supposed to mean?!"

"Dammit! Thanks to your dumb rock, were probably gonna die!"

"Hey! Shut up!"

They continued to argue for a bit, but they stopped when smg4 and smg3 suddenly began to be pulled into different directions.

"Hey what the fuck?!" smg3 exclaimed as he was pulled north.

"What the fuck is going on?!" smg4 screamed as he was pulled south.

"Well shit" Mario said as his direction didn't change.

Back at twilights castle, she was struggling with the supposed friend summoner spell.

'sigh

"I don't think this is working" she said to herself after dimming her horn.

"I'll try one more time, and, if it doesn't work, then I'll just ask the princess for help" twilight said as she relit her horn.

"Just gotta focus more..." She said as her horn began to glow brighter.

"I can do this..." She said as her horn glowed even brighter.

"C'mon..."

...

After a bit, she was debating on giving up, when she heard a faint voice.

"Shiiiiiiii"

It was working!

"Just a bit more!" Twilight screamed as she put even more magical force into whatever spell she couldn't actually cast.

...

After another moment, the voice suddenly became louder, and louder.

"Ahhhh!!"

"Make way for willy!!!" The voice said as twilight suddenly got a massive headache and something crashed into her.

Then everything went dark.

Author's Note

Honestly, I don't know if there's many mlp fans who also watch or at least watched smg4. But who cares, still made this.:twilightblush:

Chapter 2

...

"Ugh, w-what happened?" twilight said as she returned to counsiesness.

Oh yeah, the spell.

She looked around the room for the possible source of the voice, but didn't find anypony.

"So, it didn't work?" twilight said as she started to get up.

After getting up, spike barged into the room.

"Oof! Twilight! What happened?! I heard an explosion and-... Whoa, cool moustache" spike said as he entered the room.

"Don't worry about it spike, the spell just didn't- wait, moustache?!" twilight exclaimed.

"Yeah, you have a moustache, and a hat too! Where did you get it? I want one too!"

Twilight lifted a hoof over to her muzzle, and sure enough, she felt a moustache.

"Spike, can you get me a mirror? I'd like to see this facial hair for myself"

"Sure" Spike said as he left the room.

Twilight tried taking the moustache off, since she assumed it was fake, but found she couldn't.

"What the?"

She tried the same with her new hat, and also found that she couldn't take it off.

"Weird..."

...

After a few moments of waiting, twilight decided to-

"Oh, mama mia, I can't feel my ass" twilight said, interrupting her own thoughts.

She put a hoof over her mouth.

Did she just say that?!

...

She slowly removed her hoof.

"What the fuck? Why can't Mario feel his penis?!?!?" twilight screamed.

She immediately put the hoof back.

Why was she saying that?

"I don't mean to.."

"Wahh! There's voices in Mario's head now!" twilight exclaimed.

"Ahhh!"

"Ahhh!"

"You'll never take me alive!!!" Twilight screamed as she suddenly turned around and started running.

She didn't get far, as she ran straight into the wall.

"Oh! shit" twilight said as she fell to the ground.

"What's going on?!" she screamed as she got back up.

She was saying things she didn't want to, and now her body was moving out of her own control?

"Hey twilight, I'm back" spike said as he reentered the room with a small mirror on his hand.

"Spike! Stay back! Something strange is going on!"

"What? What do you mean?" Spike asked.

"I don't know! I'm doing weird things when I don't mean to!". Twilight began to say.

"Oh, a little yoshi!" she finished as she approached spike.

"What's a yo-"

"Kick the baby!" twilight said as she punted spike into the wall.

"Spike!"

"Oof, you've got a good kick there twi" spike said as he slowly got back up.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!" twilight apologized.

"It's ok, I know you wouldn't do something like that on purpose, so, what, are you being controlled or something?"

"I don't know"

"You little shit! The only one controlling me, is me!"

...

"What does-"

"No! Don't say that word"

"Uh, ok, well, do you think we should ask the princess for help figuring this out?"

"Yeah, I think I will, can you get a paper and quill?

"Yes ma'am!" Spike exclaimed as he left the room again.

...

"I'm a guy! Stupid jackass..." twilight said as she began approaching the dropped mirror.

"Hey! Stop that!" she said as she stopped herself.

"Stop what?"

"Controlling my body!"

"B-but this is my body!"

"No it's not! It's mine!"

"Shut the hell up!"

Twilight could feel herself get angrier, whoever this being who invaded her mind was, was very rude and vulgar.

"Fine! I'll prove it to you!" she exclaimed as she activated her magic and brought the mirror up to her.

"There! See? That's me!"

"Whoa! Sexy moustache"

...

'sigh.

"Twilight! I'm bac-.." spike began to say as he entered the room.

"Da da da de da da da de da da" Twilight said as she walked around in a circle.

"Um, what are you doing?"

"Oh, hey spike, I'm, nothing, I'm not doing anything" she said as she stopped pacing and approached spike.

"Well, I got the paper and quill, oh, and the girls are here too"

"There here?"

"Who's here?"

"Well, us darling! Who else would it be?" Rarity said as she and the rest of twilights friends entered the room.

"Holy shit! British horse!!"

...

"I'm sorry girls, it's kind of hard to-" twilight began to say, but was interrupted by pinkie pie.

"Hi twilight!!" Pinkie screamed as she appeared in front of twilight.

"Sweet merciful crap!" she screamed as she hopped backwards three times.

Then exploded.

'Boom!

...

"W- what just happened?" Rainbow dash asked.

Meanwhile, somewhere else in Equestria...

"What do you mean I have a, moustache?!" Chrysalis asked the drone.

"A- and a hat my queen"

...

"What?!" Chrysalis screamed as she activated her magic and summoned a mirror.

Sure enough, she had a moustache, and a blue cap.

"How did this even happen?"

"I- I'm not sure"

"Whatever, you can go" Chrysalis said, making the changeling drone leave.

...

She continued to sit on her throne for some time, thinking of many revenge schemes against-

"Ohhh, ma stomach" Chrysalis said, interrupting her own thoughts.

...

"Jeezuz, why is there so many dam voices in my head?!" She continued to speak, confusing her even more.

"Shut the fuck up!!!" She screamed, making the hive go silent.

"Wait! I didn't mean to say that!"

"Hey! Who the hell are you?! And what are you doing inside of my body?!"

"Your body?! Just who do you think you are!?

"Its ya boi, smg-"

"I don't care!!!" she interrupted herself.

"Okie dokie" Chrysalis squeaked out, surprising herself by how high of a pitch her voice could get.

"I don't know who you are, or how you seem to be controlling my speech, but you will stop this instant!"

"Um, no, I got places to be bro" Chrysalis said as she suddenly got up from her throne.

"Whoa, I feel lanky as hell" she said as she started moving towards the exit of her throne room.

"Hey! How are you doing that?!" she said as she stopped herself from going any further.

"What, walking?"

"Oh, so it would seem that I've got a jester parasite, just great!"

"Hey! I'm not a parasite!"

"Yes you are, be quiet!" Chrysalis said as she made her way back to her throne.

"Oh hell no!"

Chapter 3

Cadence woke up with a headache that morning.

She didn't think much of it, of course, she just thought it was a simple headache, and that the day would go normally.

Oh how wrong she was.

It all started going downhill when she saw herself in her mirror.

And saw the mustache and dark blue cap.

"What in the world...?" Cadence said as she tried taking the mustache off.

"What the hell is thiiis??" She added.

...

She didn't want to add that though.

"Why am I a cute little pony?! I'm supposed to be badass! This is bullshit!" Cadence screamed into the mirror.

She put a hoof over her mouth.

Why was she saying such things?

Her question would remain unanswered as she involuntary removed her hoof from her muzzle.

"I swear to god, I'm gonna find that red fat ass and bash his skull in!"

What?!

"No! I'm not doing that!" she screamed at herself.

She didn't exactly know why she was planning on finding some pony and doing that to them, but she really wasn't planning on letting that happen.

"Huh? Who said that?" Cadence asked.

"I did!" she replied to herself.

"Ah geez, a voice in my head, am I going crazy?"

"Honestly? I think that may just be it"

"Hey! Shut up!" Who are you anyway?"

"I should be asking whoever you are that same question"

"I'm me! And you're just a voice in my head!"

'sigh

"No, your the voice in my head, now, if you'll excuse me, I need to prepare for my duties" Cadence said to herself as she started to head for the exit of her room.

"Oi! I don't got time for whatever dumb duties you gotta do! I was kind of in the middle of something you know?" she said as she suddenly turned towards her window.

"Hey! How are you doing that?!" Cadence screamed as she willed herself back to her original direction.

"And now you've taken control of my new body?! Just great"

"Your- this is my body thank you very much!"

"Yeah yeah whatever you say, what are these duties about anyway?"

"I'm a princess"

...

"You've got to be kidding me, a princess?! Man, hopefully the other two got shittier bodies"

...

Other two?

Twilight's friends silently watched the gold coin that was on the ground.

"Pinkie, what did you do?" Fluttershy asked.

"I- I don't know! I just said hi and I guess she got scared and-" Pinkie began to say, but was cut off by rarity.

"And she exploded?!" Rarity screamed, making everypony wince.

"I guess?" Pinkie said.

"Should we tell some pony? Maybe the princess?" Applejack asked.

"No! We can't tell her, she'll freak out like you won't believe!" Rainbow dash replied.

"Well we've got ta tell some pony! Twilight just exploded!"

As twilights friends started to argue, spike decided to just send a letter to the princess.

Yeah, maybe she would freak out, but it couldn't be that bad right? Besides, she would find out eventually.

...

Twilight's friends stopped arguing when they noticed spike send a letter by fire breath.

"Spike! You didn't send that to the princess right?" Rainbow dash asked.

"I did, why are you so freaked out about telling the princess about this anyway?" Spike asked.

...

"Pony feathers" rainbow dash simply replied.