More than This

Chapters

Chapter Two: What I could gain
Chapter Three: The Price I had to pay
Chapter 4: My Happiest Time
Chapter Five: My Chance
Chapter 6: I Call It Peace
Chapter Seven: My Role in all of This
Chapter Eight: What I wanted to hear
Chapter 9: The Simplest of Truths
Chapter 10: The Road I'm Taking
Chapter Twelve: Me and her, face to face at last...
Chapter Thirteen: Diamond Tiara
Chapter Fourteen: Silver Spoon
Chapter One: What I Lost
Chapter 11: Our Peace is Destroyed

Chapter Two: What I could gain

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter Two: What I could gain

Fancy Pants’ club has a touch of old fashioned class, while still managing to look modern. Everything about the place and it’s atmosphere is modeled to dull the sense with its semblance of decadent luxury: the loud, almost tacky mahogany interiors, the golden spotlights and refinements, the primordial pounding of basses and drums of the orchestra coursing and beating trough chests and veins, sounds of ponies talking and laughing inhibited while abandoning themselves to every pleasure money and Fate has to offer them, without guilt or conscience.

Tiara and Spoon’s private table is confined to an angle of the hall, isolated from all the ruckus and confusion. Explicitly demanded by Tiara, of course. The thought of her and her adorable, little Spoony mixed in with the common rubble? No way in Tartarus!

A stallion arrives and escorts them to their table, leaving without another word the moment they arrive.

Spoon holds the chair for Tiara, while sporting a goofy smile. She waits for her to sit, at which the pink mare answers with a delighted giggle and snuggles into her seat. Tiara takes her time in making herself comfortable, entertained by the surprising politeness she had been shown the day before.

Tiara rudely gestures to a nearby waiter to bring some drinks, not even looking in the eyes of the young colt. She notes Spoon’s uneasy shrugging and her unsuccessful attempts to avoid her eyes. She seems to scrutinize her with the utmost attention while Tiara just wants to hear whatever she has to say.

“Are you okay?” they ask almost in unison, Spoon just a millisecond later. They both let out an embarrassed giggle that lasts even less.

“You first!” Their voices are still synchronized “Nonono, I said you…”

“How are you holding up?” Spoon finally manages to say something independently, taking a tentative sip from the just arrived drink. She gasps and sours her lips. “Isn’t this stuff a bit too…strong?”

Tiara holds a hoof to her chest in mock surprise. “Oooohhh, want me to order some milk? No, wait! Let’s take it a step further: water. Crystalline water right from the mountains of…”

“Ok, ok, I’ll drink it! Sheesh…” she takes another sip, grimacing even more and spitting her tongue out. A snorting giggle escapes from Tiara and Spoon looks on, amused

“A smile, finally. If I have to get drunk to make you smile again, well . . . I can live with that.” She rolls her eyes.

“Wonderful! Waiter!” Tiara signals to the same colt.

“Wait, you don’t mean-”

“What? You’re taking it back now?” Tiara interrupts, glaring at Spoon with an arrogant smirk.

Spoon doesn’t fail to notice it, answering with a relieved sigh. “You’re joking!” A small drop of sweat crosses her brow followed by a nervous laugh.

“Yeah, I still remember how to joke you know. And to answer your question…I don’t.”

“Huh?”

“I’m not ‘holding up.’ I falter, day after day.” A dismal look is written on her eyes.

“It’s hard, isn’t it? Sorry if I’m always asking you the same question but…”

“No, no. It’s fine. It’s not something that you could understand anyways. Nopony could ever hope to understand. What he meant for me…After she got away, me and Daddy drew closer than ever before. Except for you and him, I had almost nopony to talk to.”

“What about Ap-”

A glare from Tiara silences her. The smouldering gaze pierces her very soul and withers her throat, causing Spoon to reach for the vengeful liquor.

“Don’t bring her up. Just don’t!”

“I won’t, I won’t…” An embarrassed silence follows, filled only by the music and the hoofsteps of the same unicorn waiter Tiara had gestured before. He scurries in between the tables, levitating a tray full of drinks before him.

“I can’t look myself at the mirror anymore” Tiara blurts out, letting her mind wander after the first thought that emerges from the depths of her mind. “Nopony is there to recognize me as Diamond Tiara. Nopony notices the little spoiled filly has grown. After all, I am spoiled. Aren’t I?” Tiara knocks back another drink.

Spoon listens in silence, and leans closer towards her friend.

“There was one day I woke up earlier than usual, and I found myself in my parent’s... my father’s bed. Alone, wrapped in cold sheets and still with a dumb glimmer of hope that at least Daddy would be there to say good morning with a smile and pat my head. I was exhausted that night, for Celestia’s sake. I probably didn’t realize because I was so tired from yelling at my servants…”

“Why?”

“I can’t remember right now...mostly because they’re stupid. So stupid, in fact, that nopony was home this morning. Lousy slouches. Just because your employer isn’t there anymore doesn’t mean you can take a vacation! After all, I’m the boss now. They work for me! Probably the most productive thing I’ve done all day was that cold shower, so at least I could feel something. Anything!”

Spoon grabs her hoof lying on the table and holds it firmly. Tiara’s pulse races as the effects of the alcohol flushes her her cheeks red. Maybe it’s Spoon’s gesture or an odd combination of both.

Equine touch.

She hadn’t realized how much she had longed for it... How much she had longed for her touch since that day. Spoon is the one constant in her life that never changes; she always bring joy and comfort to her life, asking nothing in return except for her company.

She is the beacon that nurtures and consoles her during those dark days. Even if the whole world stood against her, Spoon wouldn’t.

She would never leave her alone or let her fall into the dark corners the light can’t touch...

Spoon sits up in her chair. “You’re not seeing anypony else? What are you doing these days?”

Tiara takes her drink and holds the glass in midair, swirling it. “I already told you. I falter...But not so much now that I’ve started seeing you again. The only pony I’ve spoken to in the past few days is you. It’s just like I said the other day. I’m alone,“ she gulps down the whole glass, “except for you. You make me steadier.”

“That’s what I’m here for. Just like old times.” They clink their glasses together and exchange a warm smile.

“You’re my only friend…That’s the one thing I would never change!” Tiara’s smile gets wider and more sincere than before. She had guessed right: seeing Spoon was just the medicine she needed. “But enough about me. It’s nice of you to keep me company and I don’t want to depress you! How are you holding up?”

“The same stuff, really. Trying to finish my studies, keeping an eye on old friends...”

“That’s it?” she cocks an eyebrow, disappointed, “Uhm...Maybe I wasn’t being clear enough...Isn’t there a special somepony yet?”

Spoon’s face darkens into a solid shade of crimson and she starts to babble, turning into an incoherent mess. “W-What...I mean...Yes...I mean, no!”

“Well that’s one comprehensive answer. Let’s start from the basis: does he exists?” She stifles a little laugh.

“Of course she exists.”

“Ooohhh...She! Dear, little Spoony has grown up and became a fillyfooler! How cute!” Tiara collapses into an inelegant, shrieking laughter on the table. “Do I know her?” she asks between chortles.

“Well, you could say that, sure. But I know it’s not the right moment to tell her. She’s one difficult pony to deal with and i know I’m getting just one chance with her. If I screw this up, If I say the wrong thing at the wrong time...But I care about her as much as I care for you. Which is a lot by the way.”

Aaawwww...Aren’t you the sweetest thing!

“Wow! She seems a real pain...No offense.”

“I wouldn’t say that. She’s...unique. That’s it. One very unique pony that just needs to be understood. It’s just the way she is and I wouldn’t have her any other way.”

“Well, she still sounds like a pain to me. No offense, though. If you like her, fine, but I always thought that ponies need to be as straightforward as possible. If she likes you, she shouldn’t force you to solve a math problem just to show it to you. She should just, you know, kiss you and be done with it. ”

“She’s not doing it on purpose. Believe me, I know.”

“It’s still seems pretty foalish to me.”

Spoon’s eyes gleam in surprise, “Speaking of foals! I have something to show you…” Spoon whips out a small piece of paper from her saddlebag and passes it to Tiara, accompanied by a reassuring smile. “Just look what I’ve found the other day in my desk’s drawer!”

Tiaras pupils open in shock as she stares at the paper. She had long thought this particular memory lost to the passage of time.

It’s an old photograph. Very old, actually, judging from the yellow smears and crumpled corners; she places it at ten years old, but she can’t be sure. It portrays the two of them when they were just young fillies.

It was taken on a day long past. The two of them are wearing extremely silly bunny suits and jumping in circles over some jars. Their faces look so happy…their smiles are so broad and genuine that just thinking of it makes her want to smile too, like in those distant memories. Those were the best moment of a long, beautiful friendship.

Two fillies stare back at her, two friends that are happy to have each other, even in such a ridiculous situation. Two content faces basking in the light of the day.

Then she remembers where it was taken and who was there. Her eyes quiver with rage as her mouth babbles incoherent froth. She snatches the photo and shreds the memory to pieces, throwing the ashes back at Spoon. Spoon’s face, crumbling in crushing despair, reflect in her purple eyes as she takes another swig to drown her anger.

“Of all the things…” she slams the empty glass on the table, “…you had to bring that up?!”

Spoon frantically retrieves the pieces from the table and makes them disappear back into her bag in one fluid motion. “I-I thought we had fun…You were so glad to see me with that costume on and—”

“Had is the key word, Spoon! Have you forgotten how much I was humiliated and how much she had gloated over it? You are not the problem! She was!” She steels her teeth, hoping they hold back the floodgates of venom. Instead, her furor wears the bone down to cinders.

“But why bringing this up now? It was so long ago and—”

“It will never be too long ago! Never!” The last word is screamed with such shrillness that some of the other patrons turn and shake their heads in disapproval, only to be silenced by Tiara’s soul-piercing stare.

“Please, Tiara...” Spoon’s voice cracks and goes monotone as the grey mare lowers her head. “Can’t you just let go?”

“Let it go?! How could I let it go? She was so absorbed in her sister’s babbling that she ended up believing it. Like, she really thinks she is my friend? After how she treated me? After what she did to me? She mocked me, Spoon! Like she’s done her whole life...my life! She’s not my friend! That hick will NEVER be my friend! Read my lips: N-E-V-E-R! You are my friend, Spoon! You and nopony else!”

Tiara sheds her state of unbridled rage when she hears the soft whimpers coming from the opposite end of the table. Her friend is slumping down on the table, covering her face with her forehooves. Tiara rises from her chair and approaches her friend with a crushed look in her eyes, a look that approaches concern.

Not now...Not you too...I can’t lose you too...

“Spoony...I...” she caresses her shoulder with a hoof, “I’m so sorry...”

“Don’t worry...” she wipes her face with a hoof, “I’m used to it.” She puts on a much more melancholic, yet still tender, smile after a nervous sigh. A smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes, but a smile which Tiara nevertheless returns, not knowing how to deal with this. It breaks for just a second.

The orchestra erupts with a warm tune that catches her ears; the captivating melody fills the dance floor in a matter of minutes. It’s a very welcome diversion that breaks the awkward silence between the two.

“Want to dance? I mean, everypony is doing it...” Tiara proposes, casting a nonchalant glance towards the dance floor, which is busy crowding itself with all haste. “Just to have some fun and... compose ourselves.”

“Huh? Me and you?” The red smear on Spoon’s cheeks returns with a vengeance.

“What? Your mystery mare is going to get jealous?” Tiara leans closer and whispers into her ear. “She’ll never know. I’m not telling... Besides we are just friends, right?”

“Yeah... I mean yes! Yes we are!” She scrapes together all of her courage and gulps down the last glass of disgusting liquor.
She shudders and assumes a lemon sucking grimace, which Tiara finds simply hilarious. “Let’s go!” Spoon grabs Tiara by the hoof and drags her into the dancing crowd.

“Whoa! Did my Spoony just make a bold approach? Mares love that...”

“I know...” Spoon whispers in return. The garish light of the club embellishes the delicate contours of her face, making her look very differently than before. Very much different from how Tiara has always seen her, almost like a different pony came strutting into the room. A pony that shows no signs of being hurt mere seconds ago.

Tiara can see that she has found one tough pony hidden behind cyan glasses.

The almost imperceptible bass line begins to vibrate through the floor, walls, and both ponies’ bodies. Tiara’s heart beats faster and faster, while her blood rushes though her veins, spurred on by the velvet voice of the singer.

Tiara just limits herself to stand on her four legs, circling her partner in perfect timing with the music, and following the rhythm with a head bob or two. Spoon takes it a step further, standing on her hind legs, and swirling and flowing in time with every beat.

Spoon’s inviting eyes are framed with a devilish smile, and Tiara’s heart skips a beat. Her friend’s cheek are still flushed red and she lets out a series of awkward, colorful laughter as she draws closer and closer to the pink mare. Their elegant equine bodies circle each other in tune with the music, attracted by some mysterious, unknown force that pulls them together.

Every drop of heavy bass clashes with the sweet melodies of the piano. Lost in the hypnotic melody, Tiara doesn’t notice her chest brushing against Spoon’s. She’s back on four legs just like her, while their muzzles mere inches apart.

Spoon’s warm breath fuels her confused brain as the two orbit each other, brushing their flanks and hind quarters together with increasing frequency. Spoon’s touch is slowly driving her mad; she longs for that touch, she longs for somepony—anypony—to hold her. Hold her and say that she’s not alone, that everything will be okay, that life still is worth living and that she needs to feel...adored. Adore her like Spoony always has.

But Spoony is not just anypony.

Each moment they close their distance is a taunt, a reminder of how lonely she’s been. A reminder of what being adored means.

Why shouldn’t it be her?

She can see Spoon’s lips moving, but the crowd’s noise and the music mute her words. Her lulling expression, though, doesn’t suggest anything but acceptance, eagerness even. Completely calm in her embrace, the mare with the mane of silver just waits for her move.

The mysterious force completes its task the moment she presses her lips against her friend’s.

Her breath has a strong hint of their drinks, making Tiara flinch and nearly gag, before fully relaxing in the kiss. Her tongue is spurred on by the warmth of her face and the breath of Spoony’s nostrils, so close that every huff combs her coat and goads her to continue.

Their eyes are strangers to indiscreet looks as time casts a discrete veil over their embrace. The awareness that the absolute power in that kiss could be forever lost with just a moment’s hesitation keeps their lips sealed stronger than ever. Only one thing is truly certain: this moment was worth living.

In that kiss is held everything she needed and so desperately pursued: comfort...comfort and shelter from all the dark thoughts plaguing her, swept away under a soothing, grey rug.

Their lips had met with remarkable passion, and the kiss is strange to say the least. Not for the intensity, nor the softness of Spoon’s lips or the circumstances surrounding it. No, its something else . . .

I’m kissing my best friend.

And by the looks of it, Spoon is well aware of what she is doing; her best friend shows no hesitation as she presses against her. Could it be the alcohol? No, the fumes of alcohol have to be excluded since she clearly saw Spoon barely nibble at her glass.

The fact that her friend barely resisted her advances wracks Tiara’s brain. Those eyes were inviting her like a moth to the fire. Has she already forgotten her crush so easily? It must have been a superficial crush, a brief enthusiasm for a pony she can barely understand and has no name.

Tiara smiles; there is a subtle satisfaction in being able to see through Spoon’s emotions. Oh Spoony.

Who can understand Spoon better than her, after all? A mare who isn’t even sure of what she wants? Please. Spoon had turned to her, demanding her touch and her affection. It’s the mystery mare’s loss, her friend is pleading with magnificent mirth and she is reaping the just reward.

Maybe the feeling is mutual, no, it is mutual. It’s too perfect to be anything else.

Spoon’s tongue sucks her attention back into the kiss. Her tongue starts to glaze against Tiara’s teeth in a feeble effort to pierce her mouth, only to retreat in shame as if she changed her mind halfway through. It goes on for a while, Spoon trying several times to enter Tiara’s mouth but failing each time.

Tiara starts to lose her patience. Her mouth is open enough already for her small tongue to enter and she this close to laying down the metaphorical red carpet for her! She laments the loss of that courage Spoon had shown before on the dance floor with a sigh. Tiara stands on her hind legs to better reach her, and overlaps Spoon’s timid tongue with a thrustful shove of her own into the other’s mare mouth.

Spoon squeals in surprise.

Hearing the yelp shared in their mouths, she opens her eyes a few inches to steal an eyeful of friend. There’s no signs of disgust, refusal or afterthoughts in her eyes: her purple orbs are shot open in surprise, framed by the delicate blushing that refuses to leave her cheeks. The blush shouldn’t, either; it makes her look even cuter than before.

They exchange a look, a beautiful and tender look, and a sign of silent approval passes between her and Spoon. The latter just closes her eyes again and deepens the kiss, lowering her neck to better reach Tiara and take a wider grasp of her lips. This gesture of simple kindness and gallantry is enough to elicit a pleased moan from Tiara, just short of a good natured giggle.

She lashes her tongue without care or restraint into her partner’s mouth, probing her newly acquired territory. Tiara can’t help but snicker at the fact that a good percentage of the ponies around them are doing the same thing, lost in the music. She can spot the rising pegasi wings all around her from the corner of her eye.

With some kind of awkward grace, Spoon’s tongue tries another bold move, striving to envelop Tiara’s, but flounders in the attempt. From all the times she misses and ends up in some lost and forgotten nook of her mouth, it almost seems like...No, it can’t be...

Is this her first kiss?It looks like her first kiss, at least with her tongue...It must be. Poor dear isn’t going to impress anypony with this. Thank the Goddesses I’m here.

She guides Spoon’s tongue, pushing and circling it, savouring its full length and white hot intensity. The grey mare gets the hang of it and demonstrates to be a fast learner... her touch becomes fluid and smooth, shedding the inexperience and anxiety of a very evident first attempt for something much more mature and stimulating for both. Their tongues slide atop each other and fling their tips together, exploring with enthusiastic glee their respective mouths. Their first kiss is so exhilarating and fulfilling that the two mares commence to moan so loudly. Their voices emerge from the booming noise and even cause a pair of those loving couples to turn and stare at them, enraptured.

Tiara soaks it all in. Yes, you can watch if you like...It’s free and it’s better than you’ll ever manage!

Lost in the pleasure of the moment, she senses her heart beat faster and faster, pounding against her ribcage as her pulse races like lightning. She moves her hoof towards Spoon’s chest and caresses it, sensing her nervous, silken fur standing on all ends. She loosens her grip around her friend’s neck, only to be caught by Spoon’s forelegs the second her hind legs start to wobble, locking around her withers.

Oohhh...I’m dealing with a true gentlemare here. I love it.

Eventually, their kiss breaks and they’re left panting and wheezing, leaving a tiny, translucent strand of drool between their mouths. Tara’s ears droop as her breathing gets more coarse and frantic, letting out a throaty whimper every now and then from her still opened mouth. A whimper caused not only by the lack of air, but a cry for help. A cry for this confused young mare to kiss her again and again.

Before she can realize what that moment meant, what she should do next and, most importantly, how much she enjoyed it, the whirlwind of conflicting emotions prevails and overtakes her. She yearns for more, still staring at Spoon’s inviting lips, but the excitement blurs her vision as her legs give out from under her. Her head spins as the stroboscopic lights around her become a swirling tornado of colors. Her hind legs slide and she catches a glimpse of Spoon grabbing her by her fore hooves before slipping on all fours. A loud thud is heard and her lower abdomen slams into the wooden paneling.

Voices flood her ears from every direction. “Whoa! Easy there, filly!” “How much did she drink?!” “Will somepony do something?” “Get her off the floor!”

Please, not now...It was going so well...I can’t look so bad right now...

Her eyelids turn into lead and the world becomes dark and silent. The buzzing voices whisper in her head for a while, before being drowned out by the overwhelming memory of the taste of Spoon’s mouth. It’s the only thing that matters now for her.

She dreams of her friend’s sleek tongue carefully sliding into her mouth, her endearing clumsiness in their first kiss and, most importantly, her eyes.

The look in those eyes...those eyes screaming at her to come and take her right there on the floor.
Promises of unspeakable affection, unknown sensations, of hooves running trough her curves, of her nostrils filled with the scent only a special mare can have, of silent kisses and sweet nothings whispered into her ear, of bodies pressed together in the dark and lighted only by the light of the moon reflected in a captivating gaze, of silent nights heated by satisfied mewls that rise to the sky...

Promises of things long forgotten and reawakened with a vengeance by somepony she never thought to see under that light. A friend she should have seen that way much earlier than this.

After what seems to be an eternity spent in unfulfilled fantasies, she wakes up from her stupor as her vision reasserts itself. Struggling to ignore the aching pain from the back of her head, she finds herself resting on her back atop a comfortable orange seat. A grey hoof is caressing her forehead with tender care, a hoof that belongs to a friend that gives her a relieved look the moment she reopens her eyes.

“Tiara!” She helps her sit up and offers her shoulder to rest her head on, pulling her into a hug. “Thank Celestia! You made me worry!” Her voice resonates with joy, and her purple eyes shine of their own, particular light.

“Where ish...am I....graahh...” her mouth tastes like a mix of sandpaper and battery acid.

“I brought you here, into the carriage. I didn’t see you drink that much, but that stuff was strong. I just drank one glass of it, thankfully, or else there wouldn’t be nopony with a big enough back to carry us both.”

“Told ya... Alwaysh th’ smart one. Who shaysh otherwishe is dumb. And smells.” Her neck shakes a little as vibrations run underneath her seat. “ I can’t help but notish we’re moving...” She slumps down on Spoon’s shoulder, letting a lock of her mane fall into Spoon’s eyes.

“Well, this is your carriage. I thought it was better to bring you home. “ She sighs, wearied, “I’m sorry the evening had to be cut short like that.”

“Who shaid it was c...cu... It has to end like that? I’m shtill here, ya know!” She grabs Spoon’s cheek with a hoof and shoves her face into hers, allowing Tiara to plant a couple of sloppy kisses on her forehead and nose.The smooth feeling of her coat and her delicate scent is enough to unleash a hoarse, unhinged moan of desire. “Come here you,” she growls.

“Tiara, please,” Spoon moves away her head, leaving her friend’s lips to pucker at nothing, “not like this. I don’t...”

“You didn’t shay that before. Actually you didn’t say anything. Or shomefing...I can’t remember. Music too loud. Now kissy time.” She presses her lips against Silver’s cheek making cute, disgusting little smacking sounds. The other mare faces the other way with an exasperated sign, moving away enough to let Tiara tongue uselessly at the air.

You just need some rest. And another cold shower, maybe.” Tiara slips from her hoof and lands on her chest, forcing Spoon to lean back into the seat.

“We can take it together. Also my bed ish pretty big...” She rubs her snout against Spoon’s coat, thinking of their soap coated bodies sticking against each other in the shower. “I’ll rub your back and you’ll rub mine...I have a rubber ducky...”

“Just take some rest, Tiara. You’ll feel better in the morning. Or not.”

“Can we kissh shome more? I like kisshing you...It’s so funny...He, he, he.”

"I told you: not like that. This isn’t you.” She places a hoof under Tiara’s chin and lifts her head, gazing deeply in her eyes, “This just isn’t you...” She frees her forehead from some of the hair sticking on it.

“You know you’ll never learn how to kiss if you don’t let me. Spoony, trust me. I mean, you have a pretty good technique but it needs to be refined with a lot of practice. And I mean a lot. If you just give me another chance...”

Spoon’s cheeks go red and she chuckles embarrassed, “Huh...Thanks, I guess...”

“Also, why did you kiss me in there? Why did you kiss me at the club, but you’re not willing to do it again?” Her mind and syntax return by a supreme strain of will. The fumes of alcohol are dispersed for just a moment. Her mind had circled around the issue with a thousand justifications and repressed desires, indulging in the pleasure of that moment, but now Tiara has to know. She needs to know. She must know if that was real.

If Spoon was real.

She leans closer toward her friend. She isn’t interested in what kind of look she’s going to give her now, be it compassion or concern or whatever. What matters to her right now is soft, glistening, inviting and right below her nose. But first, there’s one last thing to say...

“Spoony?” She’s still lucid as she uses that nickname. It always meant something special with her.

“Y-Yeah?” Spoon steels herself and grits her teeth, holding in a half-suffocated yelp. She almost leaps from her seat.

“I’m sorry for the photo! It’s just...I...”

“Don’t worry.” Spoon leans toward Tiara and their lips meet once again. The soft moonlight coming in through the window bathes their faces, and Tiara knows peace.

Forgiven...

Fulfilled...

Adored.

The first kiss follows a second, a third, a fourth... dozens of kiss lighten up the empty night. Their lips touch and part in an unending sequence of bliss, sharing small snippets of eternity between each other all the way home. Each of them feel so real as to be painful, each of them reawakens a small part of herself, giving meaning to somepony that never thought until today to have one.

If that meaning has to be Spoon, then why not?

Chapter Three: The Price I had to pay

More than This

By Damocles23

Chapter 3: The Price I had to pay.

The moment she awakens on the carriage in Silver Spoon’s embrace is the moment Tiara realizes she missed a very important part of the past few hours.

Her best friend is still holding her in an affectionate grasp as she lies immersed in deep slumber and sporting a peaceful smile. The sweet taste of her lips still lingers in Tiara’s mouth and, judging by the trail of lipstick marks decorating Spoony’s snout, jaw line and neck, she has a pretty solid idea of where they came from and, most importantly, when that happened.

The serene expression gracing the gorgeous grey mare shouldn’t be there by all accounts. Memories of what happened in the club reassert themselves like pieces of a long lost mosaic, causing her to feel something again, something she had hoped she’d never have to face again:

Shame.

Just...shame. Shame for having lost control in such a disgraceful way. Shame for clinging like a scared little mare to the nearest pony that showed her just a sliver of misguided affection and flinging herself into it. The worst thing about is that she longs for more, but, at the same time, prays that the moment to confront the truth won’t come soon. She longs to bask in the melodious beating of Spoony’s heart.

The heartbeats count the seconds separating her from having to face the judgement and it’s just so beautiful, like the sound of joy, comfort and peace of mind. The sheer energy of life thrives in her heart and she never wants it to stop.

She lifts her gaze slowly, being careful not to stir the sleeping pony that still holds her, forelegs wrapped around her neck as Tiara’s cheek rests on her fluctuating chest. That smile is still there, taunting and graceful. Her lips form a perfect crescent moon, mirroring the one standing tall in the night sky, screaming to be taken again. The compelling whispers of the Moon Goddess tell her that it is right, healthy and fair; this is what she deserves after suffering so much.

The signs are all there: Spoon had wanted it, craved for it and surrendered to her attentions. Why is she hesitating so much, then? What is keeping her from reigniting the symphony of kisses?

Her special somepony.

The thought of this mare, this phantom mare with no name that has captured her best friend’s heart, invades her mind as she wriggles out of Spoon’s embrace and lingers toward her snout. She has already stolen the first kiss from her, well the first serious kiss at least. And the subsequent ones, well...

Yet Tiara can’t forget Spoon’s dreamy portrayal of her, of somepony that Spoon cares for as much as she cares for Tiara.

After so many years of fealty and abiding friendship, she’s possibly depriving Spoon of finding true love, or at least something pretty close to it. Is this how she wants to repay her? With jealousy? Horrible, grating jealousy like the world has never seen?

But, then again, she cares about Spoon. She...likes her Spoony.

Could we just...make it work?Just...with me?

The battle between the importance of friendship and pure want rages for supremacy within her mind. Her lips quiver, tremble, and hesitate, stopping the moment her muzzle touches Spoon’s. Her friend wakes up the instant their noses bump, and their respective blue and purple vastness stare into each other. Spoon’s expression remains unchanged, still sporting that smile of unbothered bliss, while the look on Tiara’s face suggests she wants to be swallowed by earth and escape this embarrassing moment.

“Huh...Hi!”, she squeaks, with a voice so small that only a pony who was within inches of her could hear.

“Hello...” To Tiara’s massive surprise, Spoon welcomes her back to the world of the living with a kiss on the forehead. ”Feeling better?”

“I guess... my head doesn’t hurt and my mouth doesn’t tastes bitter.”

“I can vouch for that...” She licks her lips in an entrancing way before caressing her cheek with a hoof, filling the gap between them with her warm, comforting breath.

Tiara’s heart skips several beats and her mouth waters for a second, before she wipes it dry. Her eyes fly wide open and half a corner of her mouth goes up, contorting her face in a manic grin. “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

“I said I’m glad you’re okay.” Tiara blinks and everything goes back to the way it was before: still embraced by her friend and snout to snout with a very composed Silver Spoon.

“Oh, yeah! I’m like...really okay. A lot.” She doesn’t feel the seat moving below her hooves. “We are home, right? I mean mine.”

“Yeah. We’ve only been here a few minutes, actually. I didn’t want to wake you, so I stayed with you for a while.”

“Oh...” This time it’s Tiara’s turn to blush. “Did the driver see us while we...?”

“Nah, the door was closed when he passed. I just told him to get home. He seemed a little scared of disturbing you.”

Tiara snickers, “I wonder why that is...”

“You’re awful. You know that?”

Her face flushes out all blood and her pupils shrink with haste.

Spoon is quick to clarify. “I mean that in a good way. He didn’t even open the door! I can’t imagine what happened.”

“Oh! That! Yeah, what can I say? This tiara here on my flank isn’t there just for show. I can make myself respected with no sweat, he, he.”

“You know, DT? I like the way we are, but I think we should get out, shouldn’t we?”

Her tongue gets all tied up. The Diamond Tiara of a few minutes ago would have said the raunchiest things, if given the opportunity.

With extreme reluctance she lets go of her, and the sensation of Spoon’s coat separating from hers is like a limb torn away. She opens the door and her friend hops down, offering her hoof to help Tiara get down.

Still the gentlemare, even after “that.”

She takes a firm grasp of it and hops down.Tiara heads toward her front door, and her friend follows like a shadow. That look, that same look that she sees every time she turns toward her. Every step, every moment of silence that her friend is giving her is a stab to the heart.

No explanation.

No yelling.

No turning back.

She just stands behind her the moment they arrive at her doorstep. Tiara’s hoof shakes when she turns the door knob.

“So...” Spoon begins, “see you around I guess. You know, I enjoyed the evening after all! It was nice to see you again and—”

“Please...” She steels herself and bites her lip for the question, the real question that she has to ask, now or never. She turns, dragging her forehoof in a semicircle on the ground and faces Spoon. “Will you stay for the night?”

Spoon’s serene appearance cracks for a fleeting moment. Her pupils shrink while her body trembles as if hit by something heavy and unexpected. “At your place? With you?”

“Well, duh! I mean we are already here and there’s nopony home but me.”

“I really don’t know...” She starts to play with her braid.

“Is it because of what I said in there? I was joking! And drunk! And an idiot!” A big, fat lie. Even if halfway smashed, the warmth in her stomach reminds her that she meant every word.

“No it’s not like that,” she takes a step backward, “...it was funny, actually.”

“We have enough room, if you want. Lots of guest rooms! With big, plushy beds! I have some snacks, maybe we could do a sleepover?”

“I know. I mean I’m sure you have them, but...”

Don’t do this to me. Please!

“You don’t like sleepovers? We’ll settle for the bed, then. I mean beds! One for me and one for you. That’s it. I’ll be at the other side of the mansion if you want.”

“It’s not like that, either. I...”

“Of course!” Tiara slaps her forehead, leaving a red mark. “Your parents! You didn’t tell them that you might spend the night somewhere else. I bet they would be worried.”

“No, no. I’ve mentioned them the possibility. They know how close we are and it’s happened sometimes that...”

Then why? Why? Why? Why?

“It’s about that fight over the photo, isn’t it?” Her voice trembles weakly, struggling to keep her sinuses from firing up while keeping her eyes dry. “We can make another one, just get me a couple of bunny suits, some jars and a couple of country hicks!”

“That won’t be necessary. It’s not like I don’t want to stay but...”, she almost turns away. Away into the night. Away from Tiara.

“But you’re leaving, aren’t you?” Raindrops. Again those damn raindrops riling her cheeks. There’s not even a cloud up there, unless some of those pesky pegasi are pulling some evil prank on her. Again.

“It’s really late, Diamond Tiara, I have to go. I need some time to think.”

“Thinking is dumb!” she shouts on instinct, “whenever somepony thinks, she sees something that wasn’t there and ruins everything! She sees ugly things inside like guilt or weariness or a new, dumb perspective on things when everything was going so well! She wants more, even though there are ponies that would be anything for her, but no! It’s never enough! No matter how much you plead, how much you change or how much you love them they leave because it’s the right thing to do or at least they think it is! So, don’t think! I didn’t do it when I kissed you and it was so good. Can’t we at least have that?”

“Goodbye, Tiara.” She trots into the night, quietly.

She can’t allow it. Why does everypony she cares about just walk away with no explanation? Why can’t she understand their reasons either? Why can’t she take what she wants and be done with it? Why these doubts? Doubts, doubts, doubts, doubts, doubts...Doubts everywhere. Nothing ever goes the way she wants. Just once, she thinks, Celestia and Luna I beg you just once! I want to stay with her! I want to make it work!

Spoon already has her back turned on Tiara, swallowed by the darkness of uncertainty when something breaks inside of her. Like a cage torn open by a savage monster, she blurts out, without a second thought, a scream of of pure anguish and despair that tears the air and strains her cords.

“I NEED YOU!”

The sound of Spoon’s last hoofstep echoes trough the uncomfortable silence.

“I don’t want to sleep alone ever again. I’m tired of having nopony at my side when I wake up or I feel blue. I just lost Daddy...If I lose you too then who do I have left? Stay with me, Spoony. At least for a night. Just one night! Then I won’t bother you anymore and you’ll never have to see me again, if that’s what you want. But give me this night...Please...”

Spoon doesn't move, and neither do Tiara's eyes; that silver back stands out as her last hope against the swallowing black abyss of the night. Never before has Tiara’s soul lay bare for everypony to see; not even for Spoon. Her words were sincere and vulnerable, moved by the void the swallows her heart. It’s her last card to play to make her stay.

A trial: that’s what it is.

She's putting their friendship, neigh, their feelings to the test. The dreary, grey landscape of that day stretches in front of her one last time, clear and terrible, and the only thing that stands true and brightest is her. Only her.

She’s there and she’s real, the only thing that ever was and ever mattered. Real like that kiss or the way she comforted her without a word. How could the only thing...the only pony she had ever trusted betray her like that? She can’t. She never did and this time is no exception.

If it’s like that, it means she won’t ever be left alone again.

Not by her.

The moment Silver Spoon runs back to her and envelops the crying mare in her tight embrace is the best, most heartwarming moment of her young life. Her tears of sorrow turn into tears of joy when she basks in her friend’s warm coat, also managing to slip a small kiss or two onto her chest. Whether her friend noticed it or not doesn’t matter to her at all.

“Oh, Tiara...” she says after planting another kiss on her forehead, “ I can’t...I’m sorry. I-I guess I’ll stay. At least for tonight...”

“Thank you, Spoony.” A smirk escapes her from behind the other mare’s back. Not a smile of happiness, though; it’s a complacent grin.

Dear, old Spoony passed the test with flying colors.

It’s better this way. She has somepony to hold her and console her, ready to hurry at her side.

Spoony.

If I have to be pitied to stay with her...so be it.

Shame is what spurs her once again, forcing Tiara to turn away her father’s portrait and shove his eyes into the wall of her room. He had never approved of such little ways to get what somepony wanted but, hey, desperate times and all that. Besides it’s just for tonight, so no harm done.

His last words to her had been, after all, ‘You can have anything you want.’

It must mean something. Maybe he already knew he was going to leave her alone and, no matter what happened, she would have to trust her own abilities and wit to keep living, and seize for herself a shot for happiness, whenever it presented itself.

It must be.

He had always taught her that she couldn’t take everything for granted; humility came before status. His final lesson is all she has left, and she will make the most of it. If satisfaction and peace of mind elude her, then she has no choice but to make her own...in Spoony’s comforting embrace.

She waits for her on the lavender four-poster bed, lying on her back and covering herself with bedheets up to her neck. The window is halfway open, allowing the bright moonlight into her room once again. Tiara hopes for the favor of the Princess of the Night.

Her friend slips under the covers and joins her without a sound, save for the rustling of the sheets. Her heart accelerates the moment Spoon puts her foreleg on her chest, which she caresses with her own to calm her nerves. She turns her head to the side and watches her friend, peacefully closing her eyes.

“Spoony?” she whispers.

“Hhmm?”

“You’re not taking your glasses off?”

“I’m not that tired and I want you to see you clearly. I guessed you wanted to talk for a while before sleep.”

“And I guess you want to talk about “that,” right?” A lump slithers down Tiara’s throat, just to make it more awkward.

Spoon rolls her eyes. “You had to bring that up now.”

Ouch.

“Then...why did you kiss me?”

“Because you kissed me first! Duh!” Tiara had hoped for a straight answer, sure, but everything has its limits.

“He, he...Aren’t you...angry about it? I mean I was horrible with you and that just came out of nowhere. And the other one and the other one and... ”

“No, I’m not. It was just strange and unexpected. Unique. Just like you.”

“Wow! Am I that good?! I mean...” she takes a few breaths to calm herself, “Am I that good?”

“Sure you are, Tiara.” Her foreleg slides to Tiara’s side, allowing Spoon to grip gently on it and move closer to her friend, sliding underneath the sheets.

“Thanks. You were good too, I mean, you look... good.”

Tiara knows her touch and warmth and this time something else moves inside her, something different than her pounding heartbeat... She takes a look to better appreciate Spoon’s figure. Her friend has matured in the past few years into a very well built mare, growing taller than her in almost no time. She’s not bulky or, even worse, husky, but her frame is well balanced with built bones and tight muscles that compliment her contour. “Really good.”

“Am I as good as...her? Or at least how you imagined she’d be?” The shadow of the mare still looms over her heart, threatening to ruin this moment, even if she is already in her bed.

Say yes,say yes,say yes, say yes, say—

“Yes, even better than I imagined than it would be. Except the whole fainting thing, but I guess you can’t have everything.”

“Yeah, that was kind of a...” the metaphorical gears in her mind grind to a halt the moment she reflects a on what Spoon just said. “You imagined it...with me?!”

“Now she gets it...”

“Wow! I mean...wow! Spoony, I didn’t think that...”

Without realizing it, she’s beaming so wide she can hardly believe herself. How can it be so perfect? How can it be so...convenient? She hides her smile from Spoon, turning her head to the side.

“I know, I know. I’ve wanted to tell you for such a long time, but I when I finally gathered the courage, it just wasn’t enough and you probably wouldn’t have accepted it...” She tightens her embrace, lifting herself and looming over Tiara. Snout to snout once again.

“How can you say that? What possibly could...”

A tearful smile cuts her off without a word.

“Oh.”

“That’s right: ‘oh.’ It was always too soon for that. “

“You meant me back there. That’s who you were talking about! It was me!” Laughter escapes her: true laughter like she hasn’t known for so long. She feels like a total fool right now, an idiot, with a skull so thick and dumb...

“Back then, It just wasn’t the right moment,” she continues, contrasting her laughter with a hurt look, “I wanted to tell you, I’ve always wanted to, but... Immediately after that, your Daddy left us. I guess it was even worse of a time for telling you.” Spoon buries her muzzle into her shoulder, allowing for Tiara to lock her forelegs around her withers.

“You can’t know that. I don’t know that...” That’s what isolation does to anypony. Time loses its meaning, faces become blurs and feelings that shouldn’t be forgotten vanish. If somepony else would ask her, she still wouldn’t know if her friend, her only friend, would be allowed to touch her in such a way if she hadn’t reach rock bottom. Spoon’s breath tickling her shoulder is enough to make her to forget every single thing.

“But, know...Now that I’ve seen you like that...I need you. That’s what you said to me and I’ll never forget that voice. You were pleading to me, Tiara! Pleading is not something I know you for. You couldn’t have been lying about that.”

And there it is. That cold clutch that grasps at her stomach and doesn’t let go. Nothing about her can let go to anything. Or anypony for that matter. But she didn’t lie, at least. At least not completely.

“I know it’s horrible; you would think I’m telling you this because you need affection and I’m so proud to think that you will accept it, but I want to stay with with you, Tiara.” Her voice turns much more serious. “I want to be there for you always! You will never be alone again, because I’ll be there for you.”

“You mean it, Spoony?” A tear flows down her cheek.

“See for yourself.”

Spoon’s lips fly against Tiara’s, making the mare melt like chocolate at the sudden and passionate force that forces a tear down her cheek. Life, in all its vigour and vitality, spears her body and mind as she decides to to repay her with a much more ravenous kiss. The movement of her lips turns into a dance moving all the way from Spoon’s lips down to her cheek bones, her snout and muzzle, and ends on the forehead covered by the silver bobbed curls of her mane, which she sniffs in an almost foalish way. The scent of her lavender flavored shampoo fills her nostrils as her friend takes hold of the situation, filling the nook of her neck with kisses. Her lover’s breath tickles her skin and caresses her ears, and she abandons herself in a laughter of relief.

Spoon answers with a smirk and and another smaller kiss on her nose, surprising her into silence.

“I thought you weren’t a fillyfooler.”

“I’m not...” she pushes Spoon’s chest and rolls her onto her back, enveloping her chest in the sheets, “I just love my friend.”

Tiara’s eyes brighten in awe as Spoon unites their mouths once again with passion and fervor, swallowing with ease her startled cries. This time it’s Spoon’s tongue that takes the advantage and slips into Tiara’s mouth, humming in the process of the fusion of their lips. Spoon pushes Tiara’s chest and flips her over onto her side while her friend grabs at her sides firmly, feeling the feminine curves. The full volume of Spoon falls on Tiara’s leaner figure as her hooves move uncontrolled down her friend’s sides and withers, finally grasping her buttocks, while their tongues fling past each other. They open their eyes and exchange the same gaze they had in the club, only this time it’s far more tender and beautiful. This time they both know: it has to be and the two mares know it.

Spoon removes her tongue and focuses on her lips, sucking and massaging them with care as slowly as possible. Her friend breaks the kiss and moves her tongue to Tiara’s neck while her hooves keep pressing down on her chest, as if to say she’s not allowed to move from there.

Tiara smirks. Good. She wants to lose herself in this. She wants to be fully explored and savoured by her. Completely.

Tiara’s moans grow more frantic and dreamy as her neck is flicked and caressed, while one of Spoon’s hooves descends toward her nethers. Halfway to her belly she stops, struck with hesitation.

Tiara, meanwhile, awaits the blessed contact... and waits, and...

She glances down.

Spoon’s warmth lingers on her belly, and her hoof hovers over Tiara’s bellybutton, quivering. Tiara grabs her with her own hoof and guides her down, nodding at her friend with a smile. She seals the deal with another kiss and the glorious moment finally comes as Spoon’s hoof finds and brushes against her sensitive lips.

A yelp is heard and is immediately silenced with a kiss as Spoon makes her way between the moist folds. Her touch produces a wet, squelching noise that grows louder at every touch, and Tiara’s subsequent screams are muffled by the mare above her.

Celestia, it’s so good and it’s just the start.

A flurry of butterfly kisses invades her chest, making her gasp and shake in delight while Spoon’s hoof delves deeper and deeper, aided by her own leaking fluids. The familiar touch devours her moist folds, and she spreads her legs further to aid her lover, filling the silence of her house with loud, throaty moans.

Spoon interprets her cries as a challenge and flicks her hoof upwards to stroke her clitoris; Tiara’s wallowing desire descends from a crude arousal into carnal madness. Her cries break into gasps; the breaths fly out in steamy globs, throwing out some of the ecstasy overwhelming her mind. Spoon’s touch is like a thunderstorm, every simple brush is a whip striking directly at her nerves. Spoon plays with her sex just like a toy—she is a toy—and Tiara’s hoof slides down to help her friend service her, spreading herself even further and delving into her own depths.

Damn! Already? Losing control already?

Spoon somehow reads her mind, and trails her snout towards Tiara’s throbbing joy.

Tiara bites her lip and goes silent, restraining a few moans within her closed mouth, while Spoon dances her tongue across the surface of her belly. A broken sigh of eagerness warms Tiara’s exposed sex until Spoon’s tongue assaults her lower abdomen, pressing it profusely. The warm tongue pauses before her raging vagina, hovering there until her friend and lover finally gains the courage to probe inside her.

What she feels is something . . . something that she has longed for so long, too long. Thunder spreads inside her all the way to her spine and sets her belly ablaze. Her mind floats as Spoon eats her out with greed, lashing her tongue below, beside and above her core, feasting with a desire that is too mature and enticing to be amateurish. The power of her passion surpasses every uncertainty holding Tiara back.

Celestia’s buttocks what is that oh yes, right there!

Every inch that slides into her is torture and bliss at the same time, a sensation so strong and intrusive that it overwhelms her senses and consumes her completely. Her hind legs lock around Spoon’s head, forcing her right where she belongs while her forehooves press on her back to make escape impossible. Her cries of lustful glee are timed with every twist and turn of Spoon’s tongue inside her, and the wet noises emerging from her sex coincide with Spoon’s repeated plunges inside her. Her spine arches when she slurps in, only to relax when she pulls it out, making the bed creak and protest to her body’s spasms. Her tail, completely moistened at the base, flicks all over the bed and brushes Spoon’s belly, causing the other mare to let out a giggle.

Tiara powerful, spasmed kick to the bed causes Spoon to fumble and smother her tongue on the quivering clitoris.

“HOLY FUCK!”

Tiara steels her teeth while her friend sucks and swirls around her most intimate spot. Babbles and nonsense spew from her watering mouth, reducing herself to an incoherent, sex-crazed mess. She sits on her haunches to get a better look of her friend’s work. While Spoon’s head is shoved between her hind legs, Tiara takes a moment to caress her solid withers and neck, desperate to reach the perfect round curve of her ass.

Tiara exhales, relaxing her thighs, and gives herself a clear view of the tongue that swirls and plunges her inside her with enthusiasm, sometimes lifting her face to look at Spoon’s fluid-covered chin. Beautiful. The view leaves her no choice but to scream out once again in pleasure, neck bent backward and thrusting her hips onto Spoon’s face.

Before succumbing completely, she manages to give a little nudge to Spoon’s side and slides a hoof underneath her. Then, she lifts herself on her hind legs and gives a little push, gaining leverage on her, causing her friend to slip and fall onto her back.

A mare with sprayed legs gives her a very confused look.

“Ehm...Tiara, what...?”

“My turn!” she declares and shoves her rump right on top of Silver Spoon’s face, perfectly aligning her haunches with Spoony’s mouth. Her friend hastily resumes her work while Tiara goes for the other pair of lips she has been pursuing the whole evening; that beautiful pink that only a mare has stands out against a sea of grey fur. She takes a moment to admire her friend’s swollen sex before gently nibbing around, flicking her tongue some drops of fluid around it, and finally gives the length of her folds one deliberate, sharp lick.

Silver Spoon moans harder inside of her and twists mercilessly deep inside Tiara’s ultimate depths, so hard that it almost causes her pain; a little prickling sensation that stretches all the way to her anus, also spearing her belly and chest.

You want to fight, then? Fine!

With a diabolical smirk, she drags herself closer to Spoon’s crotch and reaches her tail, leaving the other mare to tongue at the air for a moment before finding her mark once more. A brief opportunity presents itself, and Spoon takes the chance to seize Tiara’s buttocks. Even if speared by the sheer goodness that Spoony is giving her, making the pink mare literally cream herself all over Silver Spoon’s face, her job isn’t finished yet. Tiara opens her mouth, trying not to moan more than necessary, and clamps her teeth around Silver’s tail. She starts to pull and stretch her muscle repeatedly, launching a look of challenge from the corner of her eye. Moments later she is rewarded with a more desperate tongue flailing between her legs.

It’s a competition; a competition of yanks, pulls, kisses and moans. They make themselves sore and desperate, yearning for more, their cries growing more frantic and eager, their muscles tensing and aching like never before. Every fiber of their being is focused only on pleasuring their respective partner; nothing else matters.

Tiara’s mind surely doesn’t care and orders her body, ridden by wave after wave of pleasure, to give one final tug on Spoon’s tail. The silver mare’s back curls , instinctively lifting her rump and legs, finally giving Tiara access to another spot of her lover’s body to taste.

Tiara spreads her quivering butt cheeks and gives a long series of licks around Spoons sensitive anus. The grey mare stops and pulls her tongue out of Tiara, releasing a yelp. Tiara grins, unseen by the the mare beneath her, and continues to strip away Spoon’s defenses and pierce her back entrance with her tongue. She savours the aftertaste of Spoony’s dripping fluids on her back door. By now her hind legs are standing on the bed, since Spoon has long been reduced to a horny, moaning young mare incapable of continuing her work, and Tiara plunges into the clenched muscles around her most secret spot.

Spoons cries grow frantic and desperate, almost ripping off the sheets as Tiara circles the delicate hole, never fully entering or leaving it, while using a hoof to brush at Spoon’s clit. The tip of her tongue enters her with an obscene pop and she is instantly showered on the chin by spurts of cum, followed by one last moan of delight from her friend before she collapses, panting. Observing Spoon’s quivering body, she understands, then, that she isn’t the only one who has to do something.

Why not do something the two of them can enjoy together as friends? Or something more...

She helps her friend by grabbing her from the pit of one foreleg and gently pushing her onto her side. She crawls alongside her, and lays on her back with her own haunches facing Spoon’s. Tiara lifts one of her friend’s hind legs to uncover her still dripping sex and, licking her lips, shifts her own hips forward until their crotches meet, winding the mild contact into a steady grind against her friend’s sex. Even though her touch was slow and gentle, it still makes the two young mares shriek from the great sensitivity of their organs. Tiara bucks her hips forward while Spoons gets herself together and moves in the opposite direction, trying to control her lifted leg lying on her chest and not kick her in the face in the heat of the moment. An intense and desperate passion burns between their legs, so much that Tiara to throws herself at the opposing clit faster, sliding and rubbing their sexes together in a frenzy.

Seeing this unfold before her eyes—the forbidden union of their unsharable secrets, their glistening spots flicking against each others—fuels her drive to continue, to increase her pleasure and her need for more.

By you...sullied by you. I want it!

She wants to feel Spoony to her very core; her soul and mind go further and further, thrusting her maddened hips at her in a cacophonous slap of flesh. Both mares drown in their unified screams of pleasure that pierce the silence of the night. She slides underneath her for the purpose of flicking their clits together and reaching an even deeper state of bonding. She feels so close to her, closer than she’s ever been and should have been. Her brain is wired by the pleasure, reducing her to just one function: mate, mate and mate like crazy! For that purpose she rockets herself forward and mashes her mound in a futile effort to go deeper and deeper into the very center of Spoony’s being, sending their fluids flying all over the bed and covering it with spots of every shape.

Tiara can finally enjoy the sight of her partner’s awesome libido mixed in with her own. A fiery sensation grows from within her slowly, streaking their coats with pearly lines of sweat, enlarging itself like a balloon inside of her until she finally pops. Her voice breaks and goes silent, reaching heights of sound that are impossible for anypony to reach: a howl of pure bliss that, even if mortal senses could perceive it, would still be barely adequate for what happened in that bedroom. Orgasms roll from between her haunches and radiate throughout her skin, her bones, her very being.

Their bodies lie still for a second before exploding into spasms as the waves of their simultaneous orgasm gets the better of them, flooding their spirits and making their flesh and bones quiver and collapse, panting. Their sexes drip weakly in the wake of their ecstasy, drenching each other’s crotches as a form of shared tribute.

Tears invade Tiara’s eyes as joy grasps her heart. She finally feels adored and comforted like she had begged, perhaps even more so than she could have ever dream. Her partner is already lying opposite of her and slipped into the land of dreams, leaving her alone for just a fleeting moment before slumber takes her as well.

She feels young again. Truly young. Order finally dawns back in her life and the heat of the sun warms her bones. Fresh grass caresses her and tickles her nose, snatching away cute sneezes. A whisper escapes her lips, receiver of sweet promises and unyielding love:

“...Bloom...”

A choked whimper is heard from the other side of the bed before the land of dreams reclaims her.

Chapter 4: My Happiest Time

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 4: My Happiest Time

“Are you sure you can still keep this up, sweetie? Aren’t you tired?” The old, thin stallion gives a weary smile to the young mare behind him, who is pushing the wheelchair.

“I’m alright, Daddy. Just enjoy the little stroll. I won’t be here forever to carry you around, you know; you have to feel better already” she says, stopping for a second to give him an affectionate peck on the back of his head.

He chuckles. “You’re right, Tiara. There’s still some strength in these legs, after all.” He tries to lift himself, but a loud crack is heard as soon as he puts some weight on his forelegs, causing him to fall loudly back into the seat.

“Maybe later,” he grunts, rubbing his sore rump. His daughter stifles a little laugh, thinking he doesn’t notice.

They continue past golden fields in silence, but the creaking of the rusted wheels swallows the wind whistling in the grass and shaking leaves of the apple orchards. The wheelchair stumbles and trudges over uneven terrain, falling into a familiar rhythm. Sometimes he closes his eyes to rest a few minutes, or sleep, or take inspiration from the scent of fresh grass that reside in the tree’s shadow. Tiara doesn’t dare start even the simplest of conversations, not because of fear, but because she had never seen her father so peaceful and relaxed.

He was now closer than ever to actual progress on his recovery. Well, at least the closest since she left, never forget that. It’s her fault: not Tiara’s, not Daddy’s, not even any of the former blank flanks can be held responsible.

Hers and nopony else.

They will have all the time in the world to talk when they return home.

All the time in the world.

A loud thunk is heard in the distance and the sound of several things dropping in a basket. The sounds sharpen as they draw closer, and the huffs of a panting pony echoes across the trees.

Thunk, drop, repeat: always the same routine. She isn’t bothered anymore by it; if Daddy is happy, then she is. No question asked.

“Let’s stop here for a while, Tiara”, he says.

His daughter complies with hardly a word.

The stallion looks at the setting sun while she sits by his side on the grass. The dirt doesn’t bother her; he has the chance to pat her head if she is sitting. At least it isn’t mud. For some reason, mud makes her shudder; she wasn’t particularly crazy about it before, but now...it terrifies her, like the wet terrain is some sort of ominous sign.

Tiara takes a fleeting look at her father and sees him smile, and she can’t help but return the joy.

She had almost forgotten what his smiles looked like; any and all the dirt in the world is worth this moment. He proceeds to caress her mane while the thunk in the background falls into silence, before speaking:

“You know, Tiara...”

“Yes, Daddy?” A full-toothed grin follows, expecting some good news.

“I am feeling better. I really do.”

“That’s wonderful! It shows, you know; you’ve got a lot more color on your face. But why here of all places?”

“I told you already, Tiara. I needed some rest, some time by myself to think and be away from that place...” She turns toward him and catches a shadow of sadness that cloaks his eyes as he speaks.

“But why here, of all places? It’s not that far away from Ponyville, after all.”

“You just said it: not that far away. I can’t travel far. I needed a familiar place, a peaceful place.”

“You haven’t answered my first question, you know.”

“You’re right. I didn’t,” he replies with a smug grin. She has taken a lot after him, of course; she recognizes the same smirk she loves doting on others. Yet it’s not nearly as satisfying when that same grin is flashed onto her. It doesn’t matter; she would accept everything from him, even a taste of her own medicine. She would follow him anywhere, even to Tartarus itself if it would help him.

Tiara’s father knows this. “I hope you understand. But...”

“I knew there was going to be a ‘but,’” she says, rolling her eyes.

“I want to stay here for a little more. You know, I’m not yet ready to go back into that house. I hope you can understand.” He seemed sad for a moment. He always looks sad when he says that; it’s the third or fourth time already.

“Of course, Dad. We’ll take all the time that you need. It’s not like we’re in a hurry; that’s the last thing you need right now.” She lifts herself and strokes his cheek. He lets out a relaxed chuckle that sadly, morphs into yet another grimace.

“I’m afraid that once we go back...” a tear rolls down his cheek, “I’ll find her scent still lingers on the bed. She had such a nice scent.”

Tiara’s eyes gleam of disgust. “Don’t talk about her.” Anger contorts her gentle features as she stops his mouth with a hoof, “Remember what we said: we don’t talk about her.”

“Tiara, she’s still your mother and...”

“Oh, really?” She cocks an eyebrow. ”Then where is she? Tell me. What has she ever done to be a mother? Or a wife for that matter? Do you think I wasn’t there throughout all those years of indifference? Of mockery? Have you forgotten what she did to you? To us?”

The memories fuel her rage. They don’t appear as clear images in the back of her mind, or even voices for that matter: just a feeling like a stab in the gut along with the knowledge that she has been completely and utterly wronged. No amount of wounded nerves could do justice for something like that.

Only ideas. Ideas that her father knows all too well, causing him to look away and gaze sadly at the ground.

“Sweetie...” He reaches for her, but she turns away, pacing back and forth as she rants.

“She threw us away, dad! Why should I forgive her for that? Heck, he threw you away! How can you be so calm?” She dashes again to his side but dares not look in his eyes. Her tongue is loosened by hateful words that she believes like a foal to be the absolute truth.

“I’m not asking you to forgive her. I can’t ask you that much. But at least, you shouldn’t blame her so much.”

“You talk about her like she had a choice...” She already knows the look in his face, but she hasn’t the will to face it. It’s happened too many times, whenever they’re talking about her. “Haven’t you heard the rumors?”

“You know I never gave much importance to slander.”

“Well I did, Dad!” she turns with a sharp movement toward him, “I wish I hadn’t but I did. You know what they called you? Those awful ways they called you?”

“Why are you bringing this up?” he asks, his voice cracking just slightly.

Tiara spurs on; it’s like her heart is gripped by a cold claw, but she has to do it. She has to make him understand, even if she has to be a monster to do it. It can’t go on ignored.

“After all you’ve done, all you’ve achieved...everything doesn’t matter because one day a mare, that mare, wakes up and decided all of a sudden she’s a fillyfo...”

“ENOUGH!” he roars, tears cascading from his bloodshot eyes, “Don’t you think I know that? You are the one hurting me now, not your mother!”

That look. That exasperated look: it pierces her soul and melts all of her self-justifying defences like snow. When he looks at her like that she’s a little filly again. A little filly who wouldn’t even dare to talk back to him. One who shouldn’t.

How could she? He just answered bitter truth with bitter truth.

“I guess you won, for now. We’ll never talk about her again if it makes you happy. Everything to make you happy...”

“Daddy!” She throws herself at his forelegs and into a tight, desperate embrace. Her father clings at his daughter’s hoof as if he were suspended above a ravine. A ravine that threatens to swallow him every hour of each day and that mare, that confused, desperate mare is the only thing that keeps him tethered. ”I’m sorry...I don’t know what’s gotten into me.”

“I think you know. You know it very well.” A small laugh is muffled by his shoulder. Now she knows he’s better: his wit it’s still there. The best Daddy in the world still gives her smiles she doesn’t deserve. “It’s hard for us. But we’ll make this trough.”

“If you say it, I know it’s true.” The seeds of honesty lie in her words. She would never give him less than that. She basks in that hug without a care in the world.

“Huh...Is this a good moment?” drawls a voice behind them. A female voice to be precise, with a thick accent.

“No, it’s the worst possible moment, actually. Come back in a few minutes. Or possibly never.” Still gripping her father, she again slips on her mask of scathing humor and bitterness, like nothing had happened and her world is still perfect.

“Don’t worry, Miss Applejack. It’s always the right moment for you, no matter what my daughter says.”

“Aaawww! Thanks for belittling me, dad. I always need it.”

“Somepony has to do it,” he smirks. The only one who can see through that mask and always will.

“Always ta feisty one, aren’t you, Diamond Tiara?” The mare steps forward and pats her head with an affectionate smile. She’s still surprisingly youthful for a grown mare; her visage is still adorned with a faint trail of freckles. “Ah jus’ finished working for today an’ I heard ya’ll were passing by. Hope everything’s alright.”

“We are fine, thank you. Just a little father-daughter moment, nothing to worry about, really. You’ve already been so kind to us.”

“Ya have nothing to thank me about, Mr. Rich.“

A smile lights his face. Finally somepony that always remembers that he doesn’t like his first name. Tiara, too, has come to hate the way it sounds. She has never called him in any other way.

“Besides ya asked so little from us: jus’ a few weeks of sun and fresh air to help ya get in a better shape. It’s nothin’ really.” She waves a hoof dismissively.

Tiara snorts and grudgingly gives her a nod of thanks. Even though she’ll never fully like those hicks, her father is smiling again. That’ll do.

“B’sides, ah think mah Granny would’ve done the same for ya.”

Once again gloom rears its ugly head on this evening. As much as Tiara would prefer to not see him tormented by the same things, she can’t control his heart.

“We are all missing somepony. It can’t be as much as you do, of course, but I miss her too.”

“She always held ya in high regard. Always.”

Somepony who isn’t here that we have a good memory of, for a change, Tiara thinks. “Well, I don’t think she would be happy at seeing us all down just by thinking about her, right?”, she puts on one goofy, awkward that would make Pinkie wince. It isn’t much, but she has to do something to lighten up the moment. Her attempt is successful though, much to her surprise.

“Well said, Tiara. Well said...” he pats her head.

About time. It means so little for him, but for her, the few well placed words mean everything.

“Surprised it came from ya...” Applejack says smugly, with just a hint of a devilish snicker.

Tiara answers by sticking her tongue at her. Why is it always sarcasm that runs in this family?

Tiara’s father clears his throat. “You know...You have done enough for me today, sweetie. Miss Applejack can take care of me, at least for a while. If she hasn’t anything against it, of course...”

“It would be mah pleasure, Mr. Rich.”

“Are you sure, Daddy? Aren’t you tired? Do you need something else? Water? Food? A book? A giant trampuline?” She leans closer and closer to him, letting her tongue run wild as she crushes the poor stallion under her demanding and scintillating eyes.

The older stallion almost flattens against his seat. “I’m fine like this, thank you,” he says, eyes open wide and voice squeaking out in small whimpers. “Have some fun, Tiara.”

“Fine, I will.” She turns and trots away, “But I’ll be passing by to give you your goodnight kiss, don’t forget it!” After a few meters she turns toward him again. “And a good night story if you want.”

“Thank you, Tiara. Now go on and have your fun,” he says as Applejack turns his chair toward the horizon and stands beside him.

Tiara throws several looks over her shoulder the farther she goes, catching her father happily chatting with the orange mare and admiring the sunset. He looks so peaceful, so serene by that orange mare...she never saw that look on his face anymore, except when he’s talking and laughing with her, courteous even in such a weak state. She knows that look, though: she’s not that naive to don’t understand what a stallion means by that look or with such a wide smile. There were many occasions in which he would send her away with a reassuring smile, just to spend a few more minutes with the farmer.

It’s understandable, most understandable. He’s been so lonely, so disappointed in his later years and the wounds on his body and his heart are just starting to heal. He’s an adult, so he has the right to rebuild his life and being interested and susceptible to the charm of a mare in her prime is a sign of good health.

What does he sees in her?

He could have anypony he wants, after all. Leaving aside the fact that she’s too rural for a stallion of his position, it’s not like she reciprocates that obvious affection. It can be read in her awkward pauses and forced smiles. Flattery is wasted on someponies. Or maybe she’s just thick.

Her loss, she says between herself, focusing once again on the dirt gravel beneath her hooves.

The road to her destination is long, and the sun is already sinking into the hills.

One of the things she has to admire about Sweet Apple Acres is its quietness. The noise from the town is too far away to be a hindrance and not many ponies live on the farm. Not even Tiara and her father’s temporary stay shatters the peace in their surroundings. It’s just what they need, after all: silence. Quiet, tranquility and privacy.

The sun has set and her father should be in bed soon, and she seeks a few minutes for herself now to rest her sore hooves. Spending most of the day pushing him around takes its toll on her, no matter how necessary and pleasant it is. She stumbles in the dark hallway for a while and blindly searches for her room. It’s not the best room in the world, but...

…

Finally a door knob is met by one of her flaying hooves. The moment she opens the door she’s welcomed by a voice. A warm voice coated with a familiar accent and uneven syntax.

“Ta day o’ reckoning? Ah don’t know what that means but ah’m sure it’s not nice!” A mare of her age with a coat of brilliant yellow lies on the bed, her face concealed by a familiar book.

It’s her diary.

Tiara’s eyes shoot her a murderous gaze: “What are you doing here?”

“Wel’, it is mah room...” she says, still behind the diary.

“What are you talking about? Of course it is my...” she takes a look around, dumbfounded. With extreme regret she has to admit that she’s right. Not that somepony could blame her: their rooms are so close and so alike. “Alright, It is your room, but it is my diary you’re reading! Where did you find that?” she enters and slams the door behind her with a hind leg.

“Ya left it here las’ night. Don’t you remember?” She finally removes it from her face. She’s wearing her mane loosely, instead of the usual bow. That red mess is a real eyesore: so bright and undignified...

“Well, of course I forgot,” she rolls her eyes, “I was probably distracted filling in the missing letters in that travesty you dare call speech.”

“What’s wrong with mah speech?”

“My. Not to mention that fat, blank flank you have there. That probably stole my attention as well. Seriously, you can’t look away from that thing.”

“Now ya’re jus’ doing ‘t on purpose.” She lifts herself from the bed and raises her flank in Tiara’s full view, wiggling it around. She shows off a beautiful zap apple-shaped cutie mark. It’s six colors clash with the beige tone of her fur. Her plump and round flank has just a sliver of fat in excess, but compared to Tiara’s leaner and tapered figure it’s always too much. “Ya see? Cutie Mar’k!”

“You could have painted it on your fur.”

“Come on, that’s ridiculous. I’ve had it for years! Ya’ve written about it.”

“It could just be an elaborate lie, perpetrated trough the years. There’s only one way to find out the truth.” She wears a crazed grin. Her eyes gleam of a disturbed light as Tiara gets closer to a very perplexed young mare.

“Ummm...? Diamond Tiara?””

She crouches toward the colorful symbol and, without warning, draws out her tongue and gives it a long lick, causing Applebloom to jump away from Tiara.”Yeeouch! Are ya out of yar min’?

“Yeah, it’s real,” she says after licking her lips. “It has your taste.”

“Well, ya should know by know...” Applebloom circles her forelegs around Tiara’s neck and pulls her onto the bed, making her fall on top of Applebloom. She gives the pleasantly surprised mare a quick peck on her nose.

Tiara beams at her with a complacent grin: “Don’t think you’re getting away with reading my diary.”

“Ah never intended to...” The two mares join an passionate embrace, and their lips waltz into each other. It lasts only for a brief moment, but it had more meaning than it had any right to; the kiss is beautiful in its simplicity.

At first, it never seemed like things would change. Applebloom would forever remain a blank-flank and Tiara would aspire to her possessions. Perhaps things shouldn't have changed, but the heart of a pony possesses the strongest magic of all: the power of change itself. The purest love can turn into fierce hate and the opposite is true. Nopony can seek shelter from its capricious whims, and the best they can hope for is to enjoy what little love they find.

Diamond Tiara never cared about this uncomfortable truth until she met her.

It’s like she had seen her for the first time, even if she had already shared a long history with her. That part of her life now seemed long and forgotten, inhabited by two ponies that had so few memories of each other (none of them very pleasant). They had been just one step above of being strangers.

The kiss breaks the moment Applebloom pulls Tiara close to her chest: “How’s your dad?”

“Better. My big mouth nevertheless.”

“At least you admit it.” She gives Tiara another kiss on the lips. Never before had apples tasted better than this; she hasn’t seen her eating much lately, though. A little chuckle escapes through their mouth.

“What’s so funny?” Applebloom asks, amused.

“I still have the taste of your blank flank in this big mouth of mine.”

“Ya’ll never stop me calling me that, righ’?”

“You can’t change old habits, can you? We can say you were a late bloomer! ”

Applebloom proceeds to swallow her attempt of a snarky answer with a kiss. Their little game starts: one sentence followed by one kiss, in that precise order. Perfect harmony, even when showing tender affection.

“...We talked about her again today.”

...

“Again? Geez...”

…

“I can’t help it, Bloom. I just can’t. It hurt him so much.”

…

“Ya have to move fo’wa’d. It’s jus’ not right. For both of ya.”

…

I know, Bloom. It’s just that I can’t.” She grasps Bloom’s withers and nuzzles her neck. Her voice reduces to just a whisper. “I don’t know what else I can do but state the obvious.”

“Ya still have him.” Applebloom deepens the hug. “Ya still have me. Isn’t it enough?”

“Don’t ask stupid questions. You know what you mean for me, Bloom.” Tiara lifts her head a bit and gives her another quick kiss, this time on the cheek.

Bloom chuckles. “Would ya have said the same things when we were still fillies?”

“Probably not. Or maybe I would have said that you meant something for me back then, too: a big pain in the flank! But what can I say? Ponies change. I changed.” She’s steady in her resolution as she says that. If it weren’t so, she wouldn’t hold that mare in her embrace. And, surely, she wouldn’t be so happy about it. “Also, eewww...Fillies shouldn’t do that so early.”

“Do what?”

“This...”

...

“Ya’ve changed fo’ the better. And I like your flank.” She pinches Tiara’s cutie mark, causing her to squeal in a high pitched moan. “It’s a cute flank.”

“What was that? What about my gorgeous rump? My good looking legs?” She lifts up a hind leg from beneath Bloom and wiggles it, carefully brushing it against her side. “There’s a quite cute mare attached to all that and don’t you forget it.”

“How could ah? In fact, let me check...” She covers Tiara’s cheeks and neck with a long string of butterfly kisses. But she doesn’t stop there; she runs the length of her forelegs and caresses her hooves with her lips; she dances across the pits of her legs and goes all the way down, tickling the surface of her belly and, of course, the tip of her tongue pokes at the fur over her Cutie Mark. She would never said it to her face, but she loves that Cutie Mark. Tiara worships that engraving as if it was her Queen.

Bloom’s kisses are like raindrops in spring: quick, fresh and pleasant.

She feels cleansed, purified by all the guilt and sadness that is consuming her family. Something pure and healing lies in that embrace, in the arms of the last pony she would’ve ever thought of, she finds peace. Not only because of the affection she feels for her, but because it’s turning over a new page.

A confirmation that she’s more than anything that mare ever said: she can change for the better. She can love and she can be happy.

That mare never told her this. Ever.

But as soon as her touch tries to get more intimate, in the same moment that Bloom decides that this is the moment to be together and feel as one, one last sliver of guilt reemerges in Tiara’s heart. Guilt that wasn’t fully washed away by that love. Bloom’s mouth is halted by Tiara’s hoof the moment it begins its descent towards her face.

“What’s wrong?”

“This. This is wrong.”

Tiara’s marefriend looks away from her, compassion and disappointment dwelling in her orange orbs.

“Oh, please, not you too! Don’t give me that.”

“Give ya what?”

“That. I hate that. You make me feel even worse.”

Bloom just slumps down on the bed beside Tiara and stares at the ceiling. “Ya know...” She grabs Tiara’s hoof with her own. “Ya don’t have ta live it like that.”

“I know that I shouldn’t. I’m scared, though. Like, a lot. Like, If i do it with you, I would hurt Dad.”

“Are ya scared of me? But ah just want to be with you!”

“Tell me about it. You’ve been telling me that ever since I got here.”

“Ya’ren’t complaining though.”

“Of course I can’t.” She grips Bloom’s hoof and brings it to her mouth to kiss it, “But I can’t do it...” she blushes fiercely. “...with you. Even if I want it so much.”

“Ya can tell me why, Tiara. Ya can tell me everything. It’s not just your dad, isn’ it?”

She turns to her side on the bed, unable to say an answer. The words once again fail her, and always with the ponies she cares about.

“Ya can’t stop thinking about your mother, right?

“She’s not my mother...” she grumbles, covering herself with the sheets. “She threw me out in this world, abandoned me and infected me with her presence, made me like her. That’s it. That’s all we have in common.”

“That wasn’t nice, ya know. Ya’ll sayin’ that ah’m infected too?”

“No, not you. It’s just who you are. Just me. She planned it. She wanted me to become like her, just to make Daddy suffer more.”

“If he finds out.”

“The Element of Honesty had a real influence in your life.” She gives Bloom a little nudge with her hind hoof. “A lie of omission is still a lie, you know. She must be proud.”

“Wel’, it’s not like we have other options. Also, don’t bring mah sister into this.”

We. Tiara loves it when she says that little word. It means being part of something more.

“I still think you should tell her. She’s not half as bad as I thought. But then, Daddy would know...I can’t let him know.”

“Well, it can always stay between us. Like it always has.” Tiara is gripped into a gentle hug from behind. Bloom’s head rests on her neck and starts nuzzling it. She feels so small compared to her, even thought she hasn’t seen many ponies lately. Still, her friend Silver Spoon has grown into a very tall mare and Applebloom, well, she still has the build of a farmer coming from a family of farmers. To think she looked had so small and cute as a filly; her embrace is both reassuring and intimidating, the strength in her forelegs could be seen as a protection and a threat.

“Or it could be something more, if you want,” Applebloom adds, planting a kiss on the back of her neck that makes Tiara shiver. Her body is tense like a piano chord, and Bloom’s touch does plays a symphony of shame with her nerves. She hates herself for this, but she is loved by somepony else.

Why should I be ashamed of being loved?

“Bloom, what do you see in me? I mean, why?”

“Why what?”

“Why are you with me?”

“Because ah like ya. Isn’t that enough? Ah like the way you look, ah like the way you think, ah like the way you insult me.”

You’re weird. Like, a lot of weird. A continent of weird.”

“Ya see? But, ya know what? Ah’ll tell you everything...tonight...”

“Same place, same time, same mare?”

“Like you want to complain.”

Sliding out out of Bloom’s embrace, she jumps off the bed and struts toward the door. She suddenly stops to turn to the yellow mare. “...With your sister,” she snickers.

“What’s that supposed ta mean?” She stares at Tiara with one eye opened and the other closed, completely dumbfounded.

“Never mind, just giving air to my big mouth.” She opens the door, and catches with the corner of her eye Bloom sticking her tongue out at her. She muffles a laugh with a hoof before closing the door behind her. Tiara trots toward her father’s room just at the other side of the tenure. She'd like to be closer than that, to keep an eye on him better, but then he’d discover Bloom.

“Daddy, are you in there?” The door opens with a sinister creaking sound and the young mare stares into the darkness of an empty room. She takes a few steps in to let her eyes adjust to the dark and looks for her parent. “Daddy?”

“I told you that I would’ve done it later,” a voice almost whispers in the dark.

Tiara turns and squeezes her eyes to discern the figure of her father finally standing on all fours.

Everything is fine.

Chapter Five: My Chance

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 5: My Chance

Tiara stands alone on the stage.

The spotlight is on her, as always, making her stand out in the darkness that envelops the rest of the theater. That little cone of light is her world, just like nothing could exist outside of the stage she stands on.

Nothing else worth seeing, anyway.

She doesn’t feel lonely, though; the world, after all, moves at her whim along with everypony in it.

The moment she wishes to see a little further, the cone of light expands to bathe her faint surroundings in a dim glimmer. The light reveals, scattered around her on the wooden boards, several wooden marionettes. They have no distinguishable marks or features, not even colors: just rounded pieces of wood glued together.

The pony sized figures remain unmoving and featureless until she takes a step forward. Another spotlight turns on and illuminates one of the puppets. In the time it takes for Tiara to blink, she realizes the puppet is standing on its four legs, and wearing a red bow upon its smooth, wooden head.

She turns away from it and sneers, disgusted.

“I’m tired of this toy. It’s never there when I’m looking for it,” she says, even though her voice trembles a bit. “I’ll have a new one, now.”

She blinks again and another puppet stands beside her, this one wearing a pair of cerulean glasses. Tiara gives a lustful, satisfied smirk at the sight of it and walks toward the figure. “This one its way better. It always comes back to me. It always has.”

She reaches for it with a hoof, and the puppet mirrors Tiara’s action. A wooden limb stretches and touches Tiara’s own. At the slightest contact, the other puppet behind her crumbles into dust. Tiara doesn’t mind except for the one fleeting moment in which she turns, only to see a bow tipped pile of dust. She forgets it as soon as she cups the puppet’s head between her hooves and leans closer for a kiss. To her horror, her hooves and face find only dust.

A pair of glasses lies on the floor.

“What’s going on?! Why is this happening?” she screams, patting the grainy dust of her coat.

She frantically turns around to see the other figures lying on the floor, bearing the face of her father. They stare at her, unblinking and wearing an unnerving smile, so similar to the one he used to comfort her. It fills her heart with unbridled terror.

You can always have another one.

She looks back at her now clean, hooves to see those of a little filly. A little filly made of wood.

Her scream lasts until she opens her eyes, sweating and trembling. She finds herself in her bed, tightly tugged in her lavender sheets, shocked to her very core.

A large black frame hangs above the fireplace, and it takes her a moment to realize its her father’s portrait, with his face facing the wall. Which is a good thing, actually...That familiar face would be so unsettling right now.

Tiara notices a strong pair of forelegs holding her, lovingly circling her waist. The warmth that lingers on her back and in the breath tickling her neck is soothing and beautiful. The horrible nightmares grant her a reprieve and depart, allowing the sleeping grey marvel lying behind her to flood all thoughts and senses. It’s the first decent awakening she’s had in weeks.

All thanks to you.

She caresses the grey hoof wrapped around her waist and moves to stroke the cheek of the affectionate mare. Tiara notes with a light hearted giggle Spoon’s peaceful-looking face with the corner of her eye. Peaceful just like Tiara’s mind.

She unlocks, with tender care, Spoon’s hoof from her waist and kisses it. The touch makes the sleeping mare slide further toward Tiara and mumble a bit, in an effort to hug her friend again.

“Tiara...” she mutters, earning a soft smile from her lover. “Stay with me, Tiara...”

Tiara trudges out of the bed, careful to not wake up Spoon, and giver her a gentle kiss on the cheek.

“I’m not leaving.”

Tiara stumbles a bit around her room, rubbing her eyes, and finds a few pieces of paper scattered on the floor. The faint light of day, coming in from the half-opened blinds, reveals Spoon’s baggage lying on the floor. She picks up the pieces of paper, unearthing the shattered memories from last night. The smiles on those fillies are still intact, or at least Spoon’s is. Those grey lips are still beautiful and joyous.

There’s a small piece of Tiara in each of the fragments. She’s still holding the pieces, looking at each with a tearful smile, when she hears a sleepy voice.

“...Mornin’ Tiara.”

The moment Tiara hears the rustling of sheets, she hastily turns and hides the pieces of paper inside a nearby drawer, slamming it closed.

Loudly.

“Morning, Spoony!” she says with a goofy, yet endearing, smile. Maybe Spoon hadn't noticed what she just did.

I’m tired of that photo.

The grey mare only grumbles after taking her glasses off and rubbing an eye. “Did you sleep well?” she yawns.

“With you here? Who wouldn’t?” she lets out an embarrassed chuckle in which Spoon joins. Her laughter almost hypnotizes her; it’s a sound so rich and enticing that Tiara’s heart can’t help but sing along. The more she has of this mare, this wonderful friend, the more she can’t give her up...and neither can Spoon.

She’s too beautiful to be just a toy.

“Thank you, Tiara.” she quickly gets out of bed with her braid halfway loosened. Her long mane coupled with her sleepy purple eyes, and the way she stumbles out of bed make her genuinely attractive, at least in a goofy kind of way. She giggles madly, not realizing it until Spoon is just a few inches from her, staring in wide-eyed amazement with her puzzled purple irises.

“What’s so funny?” she asks with a long lock of her mane obscuring one eye.

Tiara tries even harder to stifle her laugh, almost turning blue and puffing up her cheeks.

“I’ve got something on my face?”

“Yes...” says the mare between a stifled chortle and another, “...too much cuteness!” She blows away that stubborn lock with a strong puff that fogs Spoon’s glasses.

“Come on, Tiara. Cut it ou—” her words are cut short by a pair of pink lips. Tiara forces herself on the mare with iron tempered passion, almost smothering her companion with an intense kiss. Spoon yields immediately and kisses Tiara back, letting herself be guided back into the previous night and onto the bed with the magenta mare falling on her.

Snout to snout, smile to smile, Tiara doesn’t lose any time and hurries to satisfy her need of Spoony. She covers every inch of her snout and face with rabid, almost desperate kisses, as if she’s marking her territory with a myriad of proofs of her passion. She lifts Spoony’s glasses over her brow just to stare into those eyes, just to get more of that gorgeous light of day.

You’re mine. You want to be mine. Only mine...

Her kisses grow frantic, slowly turning into playful nibs and delicate bites all over Spoon’s ashen coat to elicit dreamy moans from the grey mare, her cries turning more and more frequent, and louder.

“You like that, huh?” she growls, picking at Spoon’s bellybutton with her tongue. Tiara’s lover nods weakly before letting out a throaty mewl the moment Tiara’s hoof slides to her inner thigh. So close to her mare hood and yet so far...

Tiara keeps teasing her with lascivious brushes of her hooves, and lips over her lower abdomen, skillfully tending her nerves like the chord of a harp. At every kiss, at every caress, Spoony sings the melody of lust, only to be silenced by one final, voracious kiss from Tiara.

So sweet, so incredible...You can’t be just a toy. You love me. Puppets can’t love.

She allows herself a small moment of tenderness and envelopes her friend in a tight embrace, resting her head on Spoon’s neck, who in turn starts stroking her mane and plants soft kisses on her forehead. Even these simple gestures are enough to drive Tiara crazy with desire.

Spoons had promised only to stay the night, yet when she presses her lips against Spoon’s own, she longs for more than what she’d been promised the night they became one. Her dignity was a fair price for that.

“Spoony?” she asks with quivering eyes after breaking the kiss.

“Y-yeah?” A small patch of drool rests at the corner of Spoon’s mouth.

“I want you...” Tiara’s heart threatens to escape from her ribcage after pounding so hard against it, “I want you so bad.”

Spoony hesitates for a moment that seems to last forever. Her lower lips tremble and her eyes quiver with uncertainty.

Tiara almost feels pain between her dripping haunches, but is surprised by Spoon’s lips throwing themselves against hers, locking them firmly.

With savage need, Tiara pins Spoon’s hoof to the bed and, still assaulting her mouth, rocks her hips between Spoon’s legs, slowly spreading them inch by inch, slowly succumbing to the pressure. Tiara’s tongue swirls, encircles, and dances around Spoon’s own, making her moan her soul out. The pressure of Tiara’s powerful thrusts makes Spoony yield and finally spread open her legs, exposing her sex to the mercy of the lustful mare above her.

Tiara licks her lips, eyeing Spoon as a predator watches his prey, and, without any mercy or subtlety, rockets her hips against Spoon’s haunches. The grey mare launches a high pitched scream, too high to be just of pleasure, that almost covers the loud thwack their swollen organs make. A concerned look is shot by Tiara as she brushes her lover’s cheek with care.

“Oh my gosh, Spoony! Are you alright?”

“Con...ti...nue,” she whispers, eyes half closed and staring at nothing.

Tiara leans closer. “Spoony?”

“I said FUCK ME!” Her hind legs steel around Tiara’s waist and pull her closer, intermixing her own dripping joy with Tiara’s own.

The impact almost hurts, but she keeps a steady pace, bucking Silver Spoon faster and faster with vigorous thrusts, fueling her young and slender hindquarters with a voracious greed to compensate for the fire biting her muscles. She lets go and her body takes over, doing all the work while Tiaras enjoys her sensitive clit smashing against Silver’s to a pace that goes from steady to lightning fast in no time. The search for pleasure takes her to maddening heights and turning a rational young mare into a screaming, sex crazed, wild animal.

Spoon isn’t any better; she surrenders herself to her most base feelings and grinds her marehood against Tiara’s with desperate frenzy, letting drops of cold sweat drip onto the bed. She muffles her screams of carnal ecstasy by pushing her mouth onto Tiara’s neck so hard that the pink mare’s collar bone hurts.

The spunk that she saw in Spoon’s eyes at the club is back with a vengeance, and everything becomes even sweeter.

I love when she does that. It’s so hot!

Tiara’s hips keep going faster and faster, unloading all the pressure in her loins. Everything that her heart has for Silver Spoon pours out in an almost raging way as her flesh and Spoony’s buck each other, building more and more tension in every inch of Tiara’s body. Each push and every grind brings her closer to that light; that beautiful, purifying light that will finally gave her some peace. Every thrust, and every inch of space that she gains, and every moan that she snatches from Spoon brightens her wonderful world, bright like a forest fire or a bomb that goes off on the Sun.

Spoon gets nothing less from Tiara and nothing short of amazing.

You are my light...

What follows is an orgasm so powerful, so intense and at the same time so calm in the way the two mares just slump down in each other’s embrace. Once again, warm tears invade Tiara’s eyes, only to be absorbed by Spoon’s coat and affectionate strokes on Tiara’s coat. She can feel Spoon’s heartbeat, and it’s even more soothing and satisfying than before, even if a bit accelerated. It’s a briefer and less intense experience than that glorious night of before, but no less meaningful. She plants one final kiss on Spoon’s lips, marking her as hers and nopony else's.

“Merciful Celestia, that was incredible...” she whispers in Spoon’s neck, which is covered in yet another trail of kisses. The words came out so low that she wonders if her amazing lover heard them...

“Buaah...Naaah...” Spoon is almost unconscious, still basking in the afterglow. Her tongue hangs out the side of her mouth in an almost silly looking way.

“Spoony! Come on, wake up.” Tiara pokes her, struggling to ignore the absolute bliss that wrecks her to her very bones. “Come on, you lightweight.”

“Tiara...” she whines, wriggling out from beneath the other mare. Impossible as it may seem, she looks even messier than before, her long braid loosened into long silken strands of splendid silver. “Give me a break, please.”

“Oh? Am I being too rough?” She throws a sly smile from behind her shoulder. “You know I still feel a bit lonely.” She puckers her lower lip and waters her eyes with the look of a wounded baby deer.

“Please, Tiara. You’re going to kill me if you keep this up.” Her weak smile is punctuated by sticky globs of fatigue.

You were the one begging for it, but what the hay. She’s earned some rest. She’s earned so much...

“You know what, Spoony? You’re right. Let’s go have some breakfast. Better get some energy back.” She jumps out of bed, masking the pain that eats away at her insides. She wonders why is she still doing that: after all, she already used pain to get Spoon into her bed. Why this silly charade?

Because it’s fun, why else? she thinks with a silly giggle, trying not to fall over after a misstep caused by a sore foreleg. Spoon follows her, getting out of bed and putting her glasses on. Her mane is left untamed, though, to Tiara’s great appreciation. She looks much better this way.

Spoon wobbles with every step and Tiara, like a perfect gentlemare, lets her use her shoulder to rest on.

“How the hay can you keep up, Tiara? I mean, wow! You just woke up and you were already in the mood.” She wraps a foreleg around Tiara’s shoulders to balance herself on and, more importantly, to let the the pink mare nuzzle her neck.

“I’m always in the mood with the cutest mare around.”

Tiara brushes her cheek against Spoon’s warm, lustful coat. Spring is in bloom, and nowhere is it more apparent than in Tiara’s heart. Birds sing, suns rise, fireworks explode, galaxies fade away. The words rise deep from within her ribcage, heightened and hopeful.

“I’m always in the mood with the cutest mare around.”

Her praise doesn’t reap the expected reaction.

Spoon doesn’t smile. Behind her eyes lurks . . . what? Concern? Before she can ask what’s wrong, her words are stopped by a salute.

“Good morning, Miss Tiara” ring out four maids, just outside of Tiara’s room. Even though they are smiling, they noticeably shake and a couple of them even avert her gaze.

“Morning...” Spoon timidly waves her hoof.

“Finally!” Tiara rolls her eyes, “And just where were you all last night? And yesterday for that matter? What do I pay you for?”

“Please Miss Tiara! Don’t set fire to anything! I’ll DO EVERYTHING YOU WANT!” shouts a meek unicorn, cowering in fear and shielding her eyes with her hooves.

“Yes, please! We were the first to arrive today. Just don’t hurt me!” another one pleads, almost in tears.

“You set fire to what now?” Spoon’s eyes go wide open and her voice sounds flat.

“Never mind, Spoony,” she waves a hoof, completely unbothered, “that is something to leave behind us and never mention again. Nothing to worry about here.”

“B-but...” The mare from before tries to say something, but is shot down by a quick glare from the merciless eyes of Tiara.

“I said nothing to worry about,” she grinds between her teeth, contorted into a threatening grin.

The silence that follows is awkward for all minus one pony.

“Anyway!” The grin transforms into a chirpy, almost jolly expression. “Don’t you see we have a guest? I have a guest. We need breakfast, immediately!”

“Y-yes!” The four hurry and scatter themselves around the house, watched by the satisfied grin of a mare that likes her influence a little too much. All under the mesmerized eyes of Spoon.

“You could have cut them some slack...” she says meekly.

“Spoony...” Tiara pats her head, “...you’re too kind and adorable. So let me handle these things, alright?”

A table is set in the garden of the tenure, laid out with all kinds of sweets. The two mares sit very close to each other, as if Tiara doesn’t want to spend a minute farther than Spoony than necessary. She takes a few sips of coffee, enjoying the light of the Sun while watching Spoon indulge herself with muffins and cake in an almost comical way, as if this was the first time she had seen food in a long time. She giggles behind her cup, noting with interest how she always sees different facets of the same pony: the loyal friend, the incredible lover, the unexpected sweet tooth. It just makes it more fun, actually.

You never stop surprising me.

She stuffs another pastry down her mouth and sends some coffee running after it, dirtying the corners of her mouth with some dough, causing Tiara to snicker much louder than before. Spoon faces her, puzzled, but still joins her halfway in the laugh.

“What’s so funny? I’m too cute?”

“As if you had to ask. You got all these cute little blotches on your lips. And a raisin, too.” Spoon moves a hoof embarrassed, searching her face until Tiara leans closer.

“I’ll take care of it,” she says with her eyes half closed, whispering in a low, seductive tone.

Spoon freezes the moment her friend licks her face greedily, picking with her tongue every raisin and coffee stains on her cute, round face. Even after she’s fully cleaned, her tongue doesn’t rest until Tiara starts to tickle her neck, causing Spoon to bite her lip and stiffens. Tiara accepts the challenge and slithers her tongue into Spoon’s mouth, meeting little to no resistance. The kiss breaks and Tiara takes a moment to look deeply into the grey mare’s eyes.

“I love kissing you, Spoony. I could stay here and kiss you all day; that’s how much I like it.” She samples her lips. “You taste even better.”

“Um, I would say thanks, but you’re the first one whose ever told me these kind of compliments.” A few weak chuckles finish her sentence, before Spoon returns to her food like an automaton.

“Well, they should give you these kind of compliments, but not too often or I’ll get jealous, you know?”

No answers from the mare, just a weak chuckle.

“What’s wrong, Spoony?” Her heart skips a beat. The balance of the so-called “morning after” hangs on a tiny thread.

“Nothing, I was just thinking about stuff. About us.”

“Don’t think, Spoony. Remember what I said. Just let it be.”

“What?”

“What I’m saying is we shouldn’t the over-analyze everything. It was good, too good to be complicated.” She rests a hoof on her friend’s shoulder, “I care too much about you to do this.”

“Yeah, I think it’s better this way.” The way Spoon said it sounded perfectly rational, but something was missing from it. As if the passion in that statement was sucked right out of her heart and replaced with cold, brittle logic. “But, what I said last night doesn’t change.” She gives Tiara a soft kiss on the cheek, “I’m not giving up on you.”

“I know you won’t,” she says with incredible conviction, certain of her words like the setting of the Sun itself.

“Just like old times...” A sad smile frames Spoon’s look for only a brief moment. Too fleeting to be noticed by Tiara. “Like every time you wanted to do a tea party and I always rushed to your place. Always the two of us. Just the two of us.”

Why do you always remember me like that?

“Yeah! Only this time, you can have so much more than tea. You can have me...” she circles Spoon’s shoulder with her forelegs and plants another brief kiss on the grey mare’s lips, with barely any resistance. Barely any emotions, either, almost like Spoon is accepting her affection like a lifeless doll...

Doll...Doll...Bad Doll...The doll is bad, she’s not a doll, not a doll, not a doll, not a doll, she’s real, she loves me...

This startles the magenta mare so much that she grips Spoon in a tight, desperate hug, which makes her squeak. Her throat goes sore and a few tears escape her eyes, hoping that they’ll go unnoticed. It seems like an eternity for Tiara’s frenzied brain, but for Spoon it was only a couple of confusing seconds.

“Tiara! Are you alright? What happened?”

“Just hold me. Just stay there and hold me. I need you...”

The three magic words always work.

Spoon complies with care and compassion, sharing not a friendly hug, but a tender one, even rushing to her side to give her the affection she wants. Spoon starts stroking her mane as usual as Tiara to buries herself in her neck. Her heartbeat and the warmth of her coat fills Tiara’s senses and she again knows peace, like an old acquittance that she rarely sees, but whose every visit feels like a blessing. Her warmth makes short work of the wooden sensation from before.

She’s still her Spoony.

“Tiara,” Spoon whispers, “can I ask you something?”

“Anything you want, Spoony.”

“Do you love me? Because...Because I think I do. So much that it hurts.”

“I know it hurts.”

No other sounds, but the chirping of birds and the whistles of the wind. She really wants to answer, but answer what? Why doesn’t she just feel...ready for this?

It was so beautiful, why did you have to complicate it? Why, Spoony? Why do you still make me doubt?

Spoon leaves a few hours later with hardly a word, but a warm smile after she offers her a ride home.

Tiara waves at her, hoping to be noticed until the carriage is out of sight and until her forearm is weary and sore. Tiara runs back to her room and brings out the photo, reattaching the pieces with the help of tape and a few curses. As it turns out, the only distinguishable thing between the lines of tape and the badly arranged pieces, it’s Spoony’s warm, now wrinkled, smile.

The only thing worth seeing. At her left is a magenta and grey eyesore that hops around, but she’s not important for once.

“I love you too...” she whispers, crying. Finally, the right words and it was too late. Again with nopony to hear them: only wasted words and a lost chance.

Chapter 6: I Call It Peace

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 6: I Call It Peace.

The silence of that hallway is lit by the sound of frantic hoofsteps; hoofsteps fueled by undiluted joy. Tiara bursts into Applebloom’s room, almost tearing the door apart with a kick, leaving the yellow mare astonished. Her wide open pupils eye Tiara, who pants and wheezes with a wide grin on her face.

“Is everything alright, T-”

“He feels better” she whispers, trying to keep her voice as low as possible in the middle of the night. Every cell in her body, on the other hand, longs to scream and leap all around.

“You said that befor-”

“He’s back on his hooves. Finally! Finally.” She hops in place a few times, making the floor creak.

“What? Are you sure?” Applebloom jumps out of bed, keeping her voice low as well. A smile of relief appears on her face that quickly turns into amazement the moment Diamond locks her in a tight hug. This embrace is not desperate like the the others; for once, she isn’t clutching somepony for the fear of losing them, but just because it’s the right thing to do.

Just holding a loved one in her forelegs, expecting nothing in return. Certainly not for apologizing.

Bloom seems to understand this because she repays the hug with the same warmth and kindness. It feels just like a miracle: this love, this level of understanding... it’s not something that either of them could have predicted. Not even in a thousand lifetimes, but this isn’t just a common lifetime: it’s theirs. It’s theirs and it’s working the way they want it to.

Things are going Tiara’s way for once, since this string of misfortunes started.

“Ya see? That big mouth of yours wasn’ that bad—”

For the umpteenth time of that evening, Tiara’s big mouth swallows Bloom’s words of reassurance with a kiss; unexpected, yet so pleasant and brief. Their lips part before Tiara returns to hold the mare in the same crushing grip.

“It’s all thanks to you,” Tiara says deepening the hug. Warm tears rile up her cheeks, tears of gratitude.

“What? Ah didn’t do nought.”

“Anything.”

“Exactly!”

“I would have gone mad if it wasn’t for you. My daddy would have been a wreck if we hadn’t come here.” She gently pushes Bloom back onto the bed.

“Ya know, ya should thank mah sister fo’ that. Ah didn’t have any voice in this,” she says while wearing a sly smile.

“Shut up and kiss me before I change my mind, you ungrateful filly.”

Tiara is more than happy to do so, yet this time is far more intense than before, far from the tenderness they’ve shared since then. It almost turns awkward from the haste and conviction she’s putting into the embrace. A kiss made of steel, tempered in eagerness and relief: so strong and caring that her head spins for a second. The feeling on Bloom’s hooves running through her sides and withers makes her heart skip a beat. No shame lingers in her heart, and no guilt embitters the taste. It’s just her, Bloom and the touch that is a blessing, not a sin.

I’m not infected. It’s not my fault. Things are going back to normal. Better than normal.

The pinkish mare stops there, pupils shrunk in disbelief and staring a frozen gaze in front of her. The mare beneath her disappears from her vision.

Bloom glances around, not sure of what is wrong. She waves her hoof in front of Tiara’s eyes to no avail, not even provoking a blink.

“Um, Diamond Tiara? You okay?”

No answer. Tiara is absorbed into her dissipating doubts, speared by a revelation, by a sea of emotions amid a blue and calm surface. This time she can finally enjoy the silence: the accusatory voice at the back of her head is forever muted.

This is wrong, this is wrong, this is wrong . . .

No. No it is not.

“I’m not infected. I’m not infected. I’m not...” she mutters over and over, tears forming at the corners of her eyes.

“Tiara...” Bloom lifts herself up, “what’s going on?”

“Kiss me again. I need to know that this is real.” She grabs Bloom by her sides and switches positions with her, allowing the farm pony to push her down into the sheets, while she tightly pulls Bloom’s hooves to her chest. The yellow mare leans forward and touches Tiara’s snout, planting a fleeting kiss on her nose.

Tiara blinks, her expression of tearful joy unchanged, and nods to Bloom to continue.

Bloom covers all of Tiara’s snout, forehead, neck, lips with little kisses. The touch of Bloom’s lips sends a jolt of lighting through her that shakes her very core and frizzles her already sensitive coat, but her heart doesn’t beat faster than usual. This time, fear holds no sway over her. Everything feels natural and automatic, right, for once. Tiara coos and pulls Bloom closer to her chest, almost yelping at the sudden contact of their coats. It’s like the surface of her skin is traversed by crackling thunder itself.

While the farm pony is occupied caressing and tickling her neck with her tongue, Tiara strains her neck and gives a little bite to her ear, spurring the other mare to reach the most sensitive spot of her neck. Diamond Tiara lets out a muffled mewl that stops halfway in her throat, soothed by the velvet sensation of Bloom’s tail that envelops her leg, stopping her limb from lashing out at the creaking bed.

Still skilled with that tail.

“Nnnnmmm... you still play with the Hoop-la?”

“Sometimes.” Bloom’s voice comes muffled through her mouth, buried halfway into Tiara’s chest. “Though ah’m not that good anymo.’”

“Not without magic, ri-Ouch!” A much fiercer bite than hers stings her skin.

“F’orry...” Bloom grins, still holding a small corner of coat between her teeth. “Ah thought ya didn’t like to talk about those days.”

“The past is dead. Dead and buried: it’s a new me.” She moves her gaze from the ceiling down to her belly, only to see Bloom staring up at her.

“And I thought I was the weird one...” a nervous chuckle follows Tiara’s statement, “What’s wrong? Why did you stop?”

“Were you right, then?” Bloom’s eyes shift to a confused, almost expecting look. Those amber pupils are wider than before, almost like a puppy dog.

Tiara sighs in relief. “After seeing that cute face...” she gives a quick nib to her puffed up cheeks, “...I am so right!”

A smile struggles to lighten up Bloom’s face; it falters for a moment. “Ya know, ah’m happy when ya’re happy...but could ya tell me wha’s goin’ on?”

“The fear is gone,” Tiara answers with a vacant smile. “It’s just gone. I thought I was hurting daddy, but he feels better. Way better. Maybe...maybe it’s not my fault. Maybe it isn’t anypony fault.”

“Took ya long enough.”

“Thanks for the consideration. I see that my plight was soooo important for y-”, Tiara’s gates of poisonous sarcasm are slammed shut by Bloom’s soft lips. The kiss leaves her stunned; it is only as her mind finally clears that she is perfectly aware of the joy, the good fortune she can enjoy. The moment the embrace of their lips breaks, Tiara looks into Bloom’s orange eyes with firm determination, as her heart never knew before.

“I’m ready. Like, completely ready.” With feral fervor, she switches back positions with Applebloom, rudely pushing the mare onto the bed and pinning her against it with her hooves firmly pressed on her chest. “I want you...” she purrs.

Applebloom freezes.

“Are ya really sure, Tiara?” she almost gulps. A drop of cold sweat crosses Bloom’s forehead, but her voice doesn’t tremble nor show any signs of indecision. “It’s all seems so, um, sudden. Ah mean, a few minutes ago you were so worried-”

“The past is dead, Bloom, I told you so. I have no reason to be scared anymore,” she leans closer to Bloom, mere inches from her worried face, “and I want to be happy, for once.”

“Oh, Tiara...” she brushes her cheek with a hoof, “I don’t want to force you, or anything.”

“I’ll be the one doing that if you don’t stop worrying,” a broad, ear-to-ear grin answers. The grin that never lets on if Tiara is joking or not: just the way the spoiled and enthusiastic mare wants it.

Bloom just chuckles nervously and looks the other way.

Tiara eases her taut grip on Bloom’s chest, no longer pinning her against the bed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Bloom faces again her marefriend, letting out a small laugh at seeing her determination fade into foalish shyness.

Tiara sticks her tongue out at her. “But I am ready. Ready for you.”

She seals another small kiss onto Bloom’s nose.

“You care so much for such a blank flank such as mahself?”

Tiara leans forward and whispers into her ear, “More than life itself.”

Her first love is moved by the solemnity of those words, so much that tender tears run down from her eyes and across her smile: a tearful, beautiful smile that mirrors Tiara’s own.

“Then ah guess we’re ready.”

“Yes, we are. Yes, we are,” she flashes another grin, planting her forehooves on the bed at each side of Bloom’s head. “Let’s do it right now! I want it now!”

Applebloom stills into a deathly silence. “...Do ah really sound like that?”, she mumbles.

“What?” Tiara stares, abashed.

“Nothing. Ya know, Tiara...Ah wanted this to be special. We can’t do it just on this boring old bed.”

“What’s wrong with the bed? I mean it’s a cute be...”, Tiara glances down and notices the gross sheets, obviously not silk made, and the total lack of exotic feathers in the pillows. She groans, “What do you have in mind?”

“The barn,” Bloom says enthusiastically.

“You know, the bed isn’t that bad now that I think about it.” She frowns at the world outside the window while Bloom keeps the same goofy grin. “But...why there of all places? It’s so...so...so. Why there of all places?”

“Well...” Bloom tries to wiggle out from under Tiara’s looming presence, “It’s familiar, nopony could see us or hear us at this late of night, and it’s weird.”

“Weird,” Tiara says flatly, cocking an eyebrow. “What do you mean by weird?”

“Yeah. It’s weird. Ah mean, nopony does it in a barn. Ah just wanted to make it, um, special, you know?”

A gleam of realization flashes in Tiara’s eyes, and she lets out a sinister chuckle. “Oh, Bloom...I didn’t know you had it in you.” She lifts herself from the bed, keeping a hoof to her mouth, shaking and guffawing. “You’re a pervert, Bloom!” She slumps down against the wall and explodes into a cacophonous laughter, shrill and unpleasant.

“Will ya please be quiet! It’s late, ya know!” Bloom hurries to stop Tiara’s laughter, but the lavender mare scrambles out of her hooves, possessed by her laughing fit.

“I’m sorry, Ahahahahaha! It’s just so cute.” She tries to suppress her wild laughter by actually biting her hoof. “Talk about the barn door that swings in some way and...and...hahahaha!” She returns to sit against the wall, still pressing both of her hooves to her mouth, almost turning blue.

“So, are ya ok with all this or not?”

The laughter stops dead, turning into a steel determination etched in Tiara’s blue eyes.

“Of course I am. In fact, why don’t you go there and wait for me? I have something to do first.”

“Checking up on your dad?”

“Always...” She stops for a second before exiting the room. She turns and gives Bloom a quick peck on the cheek, fleeting like the wind. “See you later...in the barn.”

Bloom returns an equally quick peck on Tiara’s nose. “ Ah will.”

Only a hint of an impish smile decorates Tiara’s mouth before she turns her back and runs away, defeated by the red flushing in her cheeks.

Tiara again reaches her father’s room with velvet like hoofsteps, fearing to wake him from a well deserved sleep. She creaks the door open with barely a breath and enters the room still enveloped in darkness. Her eyes get used to it much quicker than before, and she notices a figure lying on the bed, wrapped up in covers.

“Daddy?” she whispers. She hears a rustling of sheets.

“Mmmh? Is that you, Tiara?”

“Is everything okay? I just wanted to give you a good night.” She moves closer to the bed, so she can at least see his face.

“Well, you passed by before, Sweetie. You could have done it before, not that I'm complaining...” he searches for her face with a hoof to stroke her cheek.

“I’m so sorry about before,” Tiara says, still embittered by the discussion.

“Don’t worry about it, you-”

“No, I’ve been such a fool. This big mouth of mine always has something bad to say—”

“That’s true.”

“—But I want to change that. I really do. I know how much you...” She can’t say that word, that word can’t be associated with that mare anymore, but her good intentions stand true. “...How much Mommy meant to you. If you want to talk about her, that’s fine. It’s not her fault...”

Saying that tastes like poison in her mouth, but the moment she can see her father wearing a smile in the darkness, it’s worth it.

“I want to believe that things are getting better for us. Starting with you!” She leans closer to give him a kiss on his forehead, only to find herself gripped in a hug instead. A strong hug, remainder of better days and memories dearly missed.

“Oh, Tiara!” he says between tears, “You have no idea how happy I am to hear this. It’s the first time in ages you’ve called her Mommy.”

“I did? I didn’t notice, I-”

“Things can change, Tiara. And for the better. Always. You can change if you want, you just did.” A tear escapes Tiara’s eyes and rolls down her cheek, profoundly moved by her father’s words. He wipes away the wet smear. “Remember, you can have anything you want: If you want to be better, if you want to be loved...Just be yourself and I know you will succeed. You don’t need anything else. You’re better than this, nothing will ever change that.”

Even though she is a grown mare, the words of her Daddy are still the unquestionable truth for her heart. You’re better than this. That simple statement validates every moment up till now, making her finally accept who she is: her virtues and imperfections, her big mouth and the ponies she loves. Her father and Applebloom love the real Diamond Tiara.

It’s the only truth in her young life that she could aspire for.

She returns the hug without a care in the world. “I love you, Daddy!” she says in a broken voice, tears cascading onto the stallion’s chest.

“I love you too, sweetie.”

“Goodnight, then.”

“Goodnight, Tiara. And want to know something else?”

“What is it?” She breaks the hug and messily wipes her face clean.

“I’m happy you don’t think so bad of the Apples now. I like the fact that you and Bloom are friends.”

The red blush that smears across her cheeks is so intense that it can be mistaken for a terminal disease.

She hides her fierce blush with a foreleg, embarrassment almost choking the words out of her mouth.”Yeah, you’re right! We are great friends now. It’s just that...” She bites her lip, “But you said it! I’ve changed, so why should I care about what happened between two dumb little fillies? She changed too and...I guess I’ll let you sleep.” She gives him another quick kiss on the snout. “Night!”

She dodges the puzzled look on her father’s face, fleeing into the hallway as fast as she can. She hates herself for fearing how he would react if he knew what she was really going to do with her friend...But why worry now?

Why am I still worrying now? He said that I can be happy...

The cold of the night stings all the way to her bones, no doubt helped by the cold sweat trickling down her back. She checks her heartbeat: still as strong as a tempest and getting fiercer with every step she takes forward. Tiara takes deep, shallow breaths, letting the cold air enter her lungs to calm herself. She wonders how she can be so nervous and yet so content, so eager to do this. Anticipation grips her heart, anxious for time to be with the one pony she loves. No guilt, no blame lingers in her heart and she moves faster for fear of hesitation rearing its ugly head and breaking not one, but two hearts.

She slips unseen like a thief in the night to the their meeting place, noticing that the door is already half way open as both an invitation and a challenge. As if the wooden door is an open veil upon a yet unseen world. Tiara gulps and and leans her head inside to see, after taking a reassuring look at the stars above.

It’s like a blanket...

She immediately notices the yellow mare’s figure and a joyous smile appears on her face. Her heart quells and she enters the door, accompanied only by the creaking of hay around her hooves. Moonlight enters the building, revealing the figure more to allow Tiara to run to her and give her a hug, beautiful in its simplicity. The light helps Tiara see more clearly a distant memory reflected on the mare that she loves: her usual twin braids are loose this time and she sports a red bow, a smaller bow than the one she usually wears. Almost like...No, it can’t be...

Tiara sports the same amused smirk from before. Everything comes together the moment she looks at her mane. Maybe the past isn’t that dead, as a grown up version of that big pain-in-the-flank looks at her, puzzled.

“Tiara? Are ya ok? Is something wrong?”

Tiara facehoofs, snorting a laugh. “I can’t believe it...”

“What? Are ya mad at me or something? You don’t like it?” Bloom’s voice breaks into soft whispers.

“No, no, on the contrary!” She flies toward Bloom and surprises her with an affectionate kiss, just the way she would kiss a little filly. A kiss so sweet and brief, unlike any other they’ve shared.

Bloom doesn’t fail to notice.

The beige mare gives a nervous sigh that quickly turns into relief. She says, eyes closed,“Ah thought you would be angry fo’ that.”

“No, how could I?” The smile on her face beams on its own. “It was just so unexpected. I almost fainted, if you must know. You...” she parts a wisp of her mane to plant a little kiss on her forehead, “...you haven’t changed much, after all. Still that little, cutie, do-gooder, blank flank of those days.”

“Ah bet I look like a dork in your diary...” her leg shifts on the floor as she touches Tiara’s forehead with her own.

“You want to know a secret, Bloom? I only write there the things I’d like to forget.”

“Woah, really?” She recoils back, confused, as her eyebrow quizzically tilts up. “Even Silver Spoon? Ya talk a lot about her.”

“No. Not her. Never her. I already have a lot of things I want to remember about her.” A pleasant light warms her abdomen when she says that. “She’s my only source comfort when I’m too busy being full of crap.” For once, she knows that even if only a few ponies are close to her, each one is worth the world: her father, Spoony...

And Bloom.

Bloom chuckles, “Ah never thought ah would hear you say that.”

“I’m grown up enough to admit it, you know.”

“That’s why ah like ya so much,” the yellow mare replies, returning the hug in a much stronger grip. A warm tear hits Tiara’s shoulder. “There was something more in ya, something good, something hard to find...but so worth it.”

Tiara rolls her eyes. “You act like I’m impossible to understand..”

“Well, yeah actually...”

Tiara's failed attempt at sarcasm crashes and burns at the bottom of her stomach. Her pride doubts to recover anytime soon.

“...But not that much.” A weak smile from Tiara quells the fire from before.

“Ya showed that ya had so much,” Bloom continues, while Tiara stands there with a solemn look in her eyes. “How much ya cared for your Daddy, how much ya’ve changed for him...”

“But not that much...”

“Well, nothing is perfect. The thing is, Tiara, that...there was somepony worth loving underneath that mess.”

Tiara breaks at that, heavy tears erode her fears and their embrace dissolves into a passionate flurry of kisses all along Bloom’s face. Sloppy, uncouth, totally careless kisses; her body does all the work while her mind drowns in pure bliss. The rest of the world melts all around her, leaving her alone with Bloom’s laughter and muffled kisses.

This makes two...Two ponies that love me. “I love you, too,” she whispers into Bloom’s ear.

Bloom reciprocates her fervor and matches every blow with tenderness and care, making hardly a sound with her lips against Tiara’s. Her mouth descends along her neck and the young mare shivers, shakes by jolts of thunder in her coat.

Bloom’s mouth on her chest tickles and jolts her onto her hind legs, bringing the other mare’s face closer with her forelegs and burying her in Tiara’s coat.

Her hind legs buckle as Bloom’s tongue caresses her belly and something in her haunches moves and burns, something that can finally break free of its restraints and sing its joy. Something so pleasant and yet so alien to her senses that a moan sneaks past her lips, filling the air with the sound of a filly that has matured into a mare, at least in her heart.

Bloom’s mouth stops to lock itself around Tiara’s with a hungry greed and explores her mouth, meeting barely any resistance. It’s a weird smothering feeling, but at the same time delicious and enticing, so much that Tiara draws her own tongue and entwines it with Bloom’s.

Their hearts beat as one as Tiara’s marehood drips with need, letting small drops fall to the naked earth. Bloom’s eyes are closed so she gives a mental sigh of relief for her not having noticed it...yet.

It’s not so proper, losing control already...

Their tongues swirl and dance with each other, before breaking that wonderful kiss and leaving a trail of unashamed drool hanging between their lips. Tiara seals the deal by pressing her lips a last time against Bloom’s, like a sloppy, wet signature. Her cheek are so flushed that it almost burns; every cell of her body screams at her to take or be taken.

Doesn’t matter which.

Bloom’s blushing matches hers, but the mare holds her ground. “Turn,” she commands with a clear voice.

Tiara complies and bites her lip to suffocate a yelp when the farmpony’s strong hooves grasp her flanks. “Now lift your rump,” Tiara hears, and follows her orders like an automaton, powered only by the heat of the moment. When she feels that sleek tongue touching her outer lips she throws a throaty mewl, overwhelmed by the sensitivity of the organ.

After just one kiss...I’m a real lightweight! Just say something Tiara, so she won’t notice.

“Be gentle...” she sighs. Perfect... She facehoofs again, this time in her mind and clearly picturing her hooves slamming against her forehead.

“Ah will.” The firm voice is softened by a layer of Bloom’s usual kindness, so Tiara can relax a little as Bloom’s tongue gives an amateurish taste of her most inner sanctum, as if afraid to take a bolder approach and just picking around her fluids, almost timidly. This makes little difference to Tiara as the mere touch of her breath and every flick is like a sharp blow to her soul.

She moves her rump closer, inch by inch, leaning closer to Bloom’s head and closing the distance between their respective, yet underdeveloped, desires. She almost regrets her decision as Bloom breaches her defenses, dangerously getting closer to her twitching marehood. Her hind legs wobble as indecision erodes that previous determination. Tiara fights it and steels herself, concentrating upon the moment when Bloom lashes against her, finally tasting the mare where it matters the most.

Don’t lose control. You have to enjoy it, remember?

Bloom’s tongue moves almost animated by a potent force, licking the mare with sloppy but convincing effort. A faint gleam of pleasure finally builds up inside Tiara’s haunches and ripples across her spine. Her hindquarters stand firm as Tiara’s tongue hangs out the side of her mouth while the mare projects herself on that spot.

Applebloom learns new tricks as the seconds roll by, picking almost on instinct the right spots and no doubt helped by Tiara’s timed moans which ring like desperate pleads to her ears.

Tiara’s burning joy spirals out of control and drips faster and faster, lapped relentlessly by her lover, causing her mind to blur. Her moans descend into inelegant screams that fill the silence of the night with the sound of lust and love at their purest state.

Her voice comes out in translucent globs, crown gems for the coronation of the affection of two ponies that finally sublimates, that finally reaches the point that was hindered for so long. Every problem and confusion dissolves with every lap of Bloom’s tongue.

“Naahhh...” She tries to form some words, but to no avail, so she lets her actions speak for themselves and splays her legs further to grant her marefriend better access. She cranes her neck to glance behind and sees, framed between her four legs, the upside down view of Bloom pleasuring her and pleasuring herself at the same time with a hoof.

“You pervert...” she says between pants while red flush and cold sweat spreads further along her cheeks. Bloom tries to answer, but every word is muffled by Tiara’s flesh.

“Huh?”

“Mffmf!”

“Doesn’t work unless you stop...”

“...”

“...Don’t you dare stop!” she glares. Tiara’s first orgasm hits quietly as her thoughts collapse, almost unnoticed like something that is already familiar, like the blue of the sky.

It doesn’t make it less beautiful.

Her mind resurfaces for a fleeting moment from the sea of pleasure, like a swimmer gasping for air, and she knows she has to repay the favor. She wants to know how it tastes like after all...

“You know what? Uhn...” a powerful lash of her marefriend’s tongue gets close, too close and too sensitive. A spot that nopony ever reached. “Let me try it.”

Bloom removes her mouth after giving one last little kiss on Tiara’s sex and lays upon the ground spraying her legs with hardly a word.

Tiara turns, paying little attention to her sore haunches, and takes a moment to admire Bloom’s sex. A darker shade of pink than her own and more bulging, almost vulgar in its form and yet so inviting. There is a perfectness in that rough, round appearance; the way her clit jots out at the top of her slit is an elegance of its own.

Tiara tries to give a tentative lick and slowly leans forward, closing her eyes and sticking her tongue out...before being grabbed by a pair of hooves and rammed against Bloom’s marehood. She yelps against her depths before her tongue moves on its own.

Oh, you’re so paying for this!

Tiara’s tongue flays and spirals out of control, invading every single one of her senses with a sweet taste and scent: the sweet taste of triumph, peace and apples.

Always with the apples...

A competitive edge posses her; her tongue lashes against Bloom’s dripping sex with impatience, reaching and delving every spot in a way that is both sloppy and incredibily effective as her lover releases moan after moan into the night sky and grasps both of her forehooves with her own. She feels closer to her as she ever thought possible, fully repaying that service from before with much more eagerness.

“Gaaahh...Tiara...” Bloom squeezes her hooves harder at every thrust of her tongue before turning into a blubbering mess. Every breath and movement of the two mares is a perfect harmony of flesh and lust. A hint of liquid squirts Tiara’s face, spurring her to continue with more conviction, feeling almost insulted by the gesture...or more turned on.

With no mercy, and no style, she delves deeper into her, tasting her lower lips and lingering just before the pink entrance, teasing her clit with just a few pokes. Bloom quivers and moans, leaving Tiara’s hooves and digging her limbs helplessly into the ground.

Tiara lifts her face, mouth still drenched in the abundant nectar, and meets Bloom’s gaze as well. A silent promise is exchanged and Tiara feels something absolute and powerful in those eyes, too grand to be of just one pony. A solemn act shared by two hearts, now united as one.

I still can’t believe it was you...

Her heart hammers against her chest and she loudly gulps, astounded by what this moment means to her. After a moment’s pause, she resumes her dance. This time, she grows accustomed to the quiver of Bloom’s vagina, and with a much calmer pace shows her affection and deep commitment in a series of long, drawn out licks to her marehood. The moment she feels Bloom’s tight brushing against her mane sends a warm down her spine; never before has she felt so loved and protected, appreciated for who she is.

When Bloom cums, exhausted with a throaty gasp, she can finally drink her juices to prove that she loves everything that comes from her. Tiara finally understands what she meant before.

The way her father was smiling at her...

The way that Bloom became hers...

They both saw what Tiara couln’t see until this moment. Something worthy of being acknowledged. With every step that takes toward her, she believes more and more in this simple truth and falls into Bloom’s embrace. Circled by her strong forelegs she says it again, this time in a clear tone and without tearing up, proud of her love and what she is.

“I love you, Applebloom.”

“And I love you, Diamond Tiara,” she says with eyes half closed, deepening the hug. “ Ah love ya more than life itself.”

The snarky remark about accent dies in her throat before she can find a way to articulate it, but it doesn’t matter. Her heart tells her that Bloom meant it as much as she did.

Life has never looked better and Tiara doesn’t need more.

Chapter Seven: My Role in all of This

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter Seven: My Role in all of This.

“Tiara? Is everything alright?” The little grey filly creaks open the back door of the bakery. She had seen her friend sneaking out from there a few minutes ago and something dark had clutched her heart. Something that screamed to go check on her.

Under a tree she sees a light pink convulsing blur. With a gulp, she takes a few steps forward and recognizes the familiar shape. A crying filly stands beneath that tree, a dress discarded nearby like a cheap cloth. A crying filly that answers to the name of Diamond Tiara.

“Tiara!” She runs toward her, but the moment she gets too close she’s shoved away and plummets to the ground. The naked earth hits her back like a bullet made of stone, causing her to bite her lip. She ignores the pain and lifts herself from the ground to approach her again.

“Go away!” she shrieks with her back still turned. Spoon doesn’t move one inch. A drop of blood falls from her lip, but she’s more concerned about her friend, more than anything else in the world.

“Is something wrong?” Spoon asks, placing a hoof on Tiara’s shoulder. The touch is welcomed this time and the other filly stops shaking.

“Everything is wrong...” she finally answers. “Everything. How could I be worth less than those blank flanks? Where were they hiding all this time? They had that little speech prepared, just to humiliate me? Of all the days...” her voice cracks and she breaks down once again, slumping down against the tree. “This was supposed to be my day...”

Spoon doesn’t dare look at her face. It’s the fist time she sees her proud, confident friend in this state, and she knows she has to stay at her side. There is Tiara and there is Spoon and Tiara can’t be without Spoon. Not now.

“This is all I’m ever going to be...” Tiara turns her face and glances at her flank.

Spoon closes her eyes, not permitting them to look at her in this pitiful state. Suddenly, something brushes against her lips. A fleeting and sweet touch that makes Spoon feel a pleasant warmth on her cheeks. Her mind doesn’t register it until it’s gone and her eyes open enough to see Diamond Tiara dangerously close to her snout.

Neither of them will ever speak of this, of course. Something has changed forever, but neither of them is ready to acknowledge it.

“Thank you, Spoony...” the filly whispers.

As far as she’s concerned, Silver Spoon has always been in love with Tiara.

This nurturing feel in the back of her mind that the two mares were created in pairs, destined to be together, was the greatest joy she could aspire for. If nopony would accept Tiara for what she is, Spoon would be there— no question asked. If she was happy, Spoon would be delighted; if she was angry, Spoon would be furious; if she was sad...Spoon would be crushed right alongside her.

But what is she supposed to feel now, when not even Tiara knows? The vacant stare she pours into her mother reflects this.

“Welcome home, dear!” A broad smile graces the older mare face, her bright grey coat complimenting the old, but still vibrant, blue eyes.

“Hi, mom,” Spoon answers, gripped into a tight hug and stroking her mother’s mane.

“You could have told us you passed the night at your friend’s place,” she strokes Spoon’s mane. “I got so worried!”

“Well, I said I could have. I wasn’t expecting that, but she insisted so much that—”

“No, no, don’t worry, dear. That poor Tiara lost both of her parents in a matter of months and must be feeling so lonely. You truly are her best friend, probably the only pony she needs right now. I hope you two had a pleasant evening.” Her well mannered facade shifts for a moment into an angered glare, “Even though with a mother like that, it was better losing her.”

We slept together. “Yeah, we had fun. The club was nice and she even wanted to dance a bit.” Where she kissed me. Spoon sports a fake smile to distract her mother from that vacant stare of hers.

“Well, that means that she’s on the road to recovery. I miss the days she and her father would visit us and you two played in your room.”

“Yeah, I miss them too.” Back then she would just play with me. Not use me. “I missed her so much. I’m probably the only pony she has now. “ Silver Spoon, bucking heroine. “You don’t mind if we see each other again?” Why am I doing this to myself?

“Of course not, dear!” She gives a playful nib to Spoon’s cheek, “Just tell us outright next time if you’re staying.”

She takes a step toward the stairs. “I’m going to my room if you don’t mind. I wanted to study a bit.”

“Such a diligent student! You’ll be a physician in no time.”

Spoon forces out an empty chuckle, “Yeah! And without even graduating! I must be a genius. Is Dad at home?”

“No, he had to leave early this morning for an emergency. I’m so glad you are following his hoofsteps. Have I ever told you that?”

“Only every other day...” She goes up the stairs and enters her room, and groans when she sees the pile of books stacked on her desk, so high that they almost block the view out the window. Still a hoof full of anatomy chapters to go... she was supposed to finish it yesterday afternoon, but instead she stayed with Tiara.

It’s always for her.

She remembers the moment she had decided to study medicine: the same moment Tiara had come to her in tears and told her that her father was sick. A foalish desire to cure him somehow and make that sad little mare smile once again had fueled many wall-eyed nights spent in front of a textbook. Sleep, dreams, tears; she had sacrificed all to be her knight in shining armor, or a lab coat, and, who knows, maybe she would see something more in the only friend she’s ever had, and perhaps she would find somepony else to love. Somepony who doesn’t wear a pink bow for a change...

She got her wish, only it took far less to succeed since, as always, she did too little, too late. It had just taken her body, no big deal.

She used me and I used her.

The perfect night that she played in her mind countless times, each more glorious and romantic than the last, had eluded her for so long. And when the moment finally came that she could be one with the pony she loves, it was cheapened; cheapened by a burning, desperate, pitiful need. Just because she has the mind of a follower doesn’t mean she’s blind: Spoon saw Tiara’s genuine suffering and loneliness, and that was just the final push she needed to lay her trap.

And Spoon was okay with that. Spoon had given her heart, body and soul to Tiara to use and this didn’t bother her. She fell willingly into that trap, weaved of kindness and devotion in those eyes, oh those bucking eyes that can pierce a soul and melt it into putty. Those cruel, blue eyes stab like icicles and caress like the wings of an angel.

A trap designed for Spoon’s body because Tiara’s heart it still in her clutch, even if that mare has squeezed it so hard that only a black goo of sadness and neurosis remains.

The one pony that she would never forgive and who still has a hold of what remains of Tiara's heart. She had still held some hope that night; maybe Tiara would have warmed up to her and she could have finally fulfilled her dream...

...Until she whispered “Bloom.”

She looks down upon the book, open at the chapter about the heart and sneers at the cruel irony. She frantically flips the page to find something else to study, even though her mind is full of Tiara's voluptuous curves and seductive smile, of the scent of her gorgeous mane and eyes, of the sheer passion she puts into sex and how she was taken earlier that morning and claimed like a prize.

This thought makes her hoof move by itself and slide to her wet slit. She closes her eyes and massages herself, imagining the world between those lavender silken sheets and between that mare’s legs, dreaming of delving deeper with her tongue and of a a smile made of knives and arrogance. She gasps as she brushes her already sensitive organ and times each stroke with a suffocated moan. She was already wet and dripping since... Well since breakfast, she notes, staring at nothing. A nothing that slowly turns into a magenta shaped blot.

Always for her. Always...her. I can’t stay without her...

Spoon pictures Tiara clearly with a disheveled and unkempt mane, reaping from her absolute pleasure and unending bliss like a perfect spark is lodged deep inside her haunches and only her touch, that hungry touch, could claim it and free it. Pleasure delves into her mind like a hot iron and Spoon removes the hoof, slapping herself back into reality.

Spoon buries her face into the textbook and screams.

“She’s not there! She doesn’t love you as you love her. She doesn’t love...you...” Anger and disgust still lingers in her mouth until she lifts herself from the chair and stares vacantly outside the window.

“She...Doesn’t...Love...me,” she clearly repeats each word, savoring their bitter taste. That’s the meaning of Tiara’s words, isn’t it? Spoon had even confessed it, but her words were lost. Or meaningless for Tiara.

The realization somehow...quells her mind. Her memory returns to that fateful cutecenera and, once again, fate reminds her of her role in Tiara’s life.

Be there for her.

She always has. The answer is in the book: she’s like an organ. Every organ has a specific function. Just like the brain will never be able to pump blood and the heart will never be able to process thoughts, Silver Spoon is not somepony who Diamond Tiara will love. Sure, she loves Spoon in many different ways and not all of them clear: as a friend, as a love, as a hope... but not as the one that she seeks so desperately.

No, can’t reach that, no matter how much she struggles.

“This is all I’m going to be...” Tears form at the corner of her eyes and scroll down, crossing a pitiful, resigned smile. “We’re so alike...We’ll never be anything more, you and I, eh Tiara? I was right my love...” she sobs. She collapses in tears on the desk, covering her face with her hooves and isolating herself from the world.

“...It hurts.”

Time... time will heal and she’ll take her place once more. An organ that does something other than its function risks collapse, after all. If somepony has to suffer, it’s Spoon. If she bears Tiara’s pain and frustrations, the world will turn as usual.

Stay in your place.

A purple blot suddenly appears outside her window, replacing pain with amazement. The moment the purple fuzz taps on the glass, amazement turns into fear.

“Ahhh!” She jumps from the chair, landing with her back on the floor.

The figure facehoofs and leans against the glass, tapping again with an annoyed look. Spoon gives a sigh of relief when she notices the familiar face of an orange pegasus. The purple bush was simply an unkempt mane further messed up by winds and cloud moisture, not to mention the high speed any member of the weather team has to accelerate to.

Spoon hastily gets up and opens the window. Her mother’s voice comes from below:

“Is everything alright, dear? I heard you scream!”

“Nothing, Mom!” She opens the window a little, allowing the pegasus to squeeze herself in and hop onto the floor, “I just saw, um, a spider, yes!”

“All right...” the feminine voice goes silent and unconvinced. “Just be careful.”

The orange pegasus pats off the dust covering her shoulders. “A spider? Really? Was that the best you got?”

“I think better in an organized environment, Scoots. Besides I was in a hurry.” She closes the window and re-stacks some books into the same piles from before. She takes advantage of her back turned to wipe the tears from her face. “What brings you here?”

“Just checking on you. I wanted to know if the plan worked.”

“Ah, yes...” she sighs with a hint of regret, “the plan. You mean making one of my friends follow my crush like a shadow, because I didn’t have to guts to go and see her properly?”

Scootaloo scratches the back of her head. “You know, you make it sound bad if you say it like that.”

“Well, it was.” She lightly stomps her hoof on the floor in frustration, “I didn’t even came up with a good lie for that, when she saw me at the boutique.” Not that the one at the club was any better.

“It was no big deal. I was just on my usual course for the weather team and I just happened to see Diamond Tiara entering the boutique and passed by to tell you.” She pats Spoon shoulder. “It was for a good cause, after all.”

“Yeah, good cause...” She stares into nothing once again, in the same black abyss called resignation. “Let’s just say it worked too well.”

Scootaloo remains dumbfounded, raising an eyebrow. Spoon bites her lip.

“I talked to her, I saw her again after all this time,” Spoon continues, walking up and down the room, “we went a little beyond talking, actually.”

Scoots watches, astounded, but something behind her eyes doesn’t quite get it.

“Yes, In that sense...” Spoon rolls her eyes.

The pegasus remains silent for a few seconds until her cheek ferociously flush red. The orange mare looks down to avoid showing her blushing. “So I guess you two are a couple now?” Her enthusiastic smile is so full of optimism that it almost hurts.

“If only. She knows everything and...she doesn’t care.”

“WHAT?!” Her cry is so high that even somepony in Canterlot might look up, confused.

“Could you please be quiet?” Spoon rudely gestures at the pegasus with a hoof while tending an ear behind her. She hates hiding this from her mother, but Scoot’s visit isn’t exactly under normal circumstances, after all.

“So, that’s it? You two...” she whispers, “You two did the deed?”

Spoon allows herself a little chuckle There was a time that neither of them could say the word “sex” with a straight face. Scootaloo still can’t, no matter how many innuendos she’s spoon fed.

“Yeah, we did, but she said that it’s better that things stay this way.” Another punch in the gut for the grey mare, but pain will not change it.

“This way how? But, you told me that she knows and she doesn’t care?” Rage and indignation seeps trough her teeth, “Of course...Good old Diamond Tiara! She just keeps getting worse.”

“I know,” Spoon returns without a change in her expression. There was a time when she would have moved earth and sky to make Scootaloo regret that statement, but things have changed so much. Simple truths no longer have any meaning: she did tell the truth, after all.

“You know? Then how can you...How can you...” Rage taints her words and rears its head through her whispers; it’s an old trait Scootaloo carried into adulthood.

Some things never change.

“Just what did she say exactly?”

“That we shouldn’t make it more complicated than it is.” She grabs the book from before and reopens it with an automatic gesture. “We’re good as we are and I’m happy as we are. So, that’s it.” The heart chapter is in front of her eyes again. “End of story.”

“She used you, you know? After all these years, she used you.”

“I know.”

“But you still love her, right?”

“Yes,” she sobs, biting her lip. “So, so much.” Her shoulders tremble, and she sighs. “You have no idea”

“I’ll never get you two. I just can’t.” The pegasus gestures Spoon to move away so she can leave from the window again. She almost hesitates as her hoof reaches for Spoon’s shoulder in a gesture of comfort, but she can’t bring herself to do it. Spoon doesn’t want it either.

“Then why are you my friend?” She hates asking this, but her tongue runs loose, spurred by hateful thoughts for the world and everypony that lives in it.

“Is that a trick question, Spoon?”

“You can answer and see for yourself.” Her back stands between the two mares like a wall. Another tear tries to escape her eye, but she steels herself so much to avoid it that it hurts.

“Because, well...” Scoots scratches the back of her head, “without Diamond Tiara, you’re kinda cool and a decent pony. Besides, since Sweetie Bell left Ponyville with her sister, Rainbow Dash married and Applebloom, well...” The melancholy in her eyes tinges with yellow before before she gives into it. “You’re my friend, that’s it. Why do I have to explain myself to you?”

Strangely, Spoon is somewhat reassured by her foalish outrage. Maybe because it’s totally justified and it’s not right to doubt her few friends. Her only friend, actually. ”You’re right, sorry. I’m just a bit, well, discomforted right now.”

“Well, more than a bit actually. More like a ton.”

Spoon chuckles a bit. “You don’t see Rainbow Dash that often just because she’s married?”

“Well, I always feel awkward when I’m with her. Don’t get me wrong, Dash is always happy to see me and Pinkie Pie, well, it’s just Pinkie Pie, but you know how that is...”

“Yeah, it can be a little embarrassing after all.” Her mind goes to her earlier days and to a mare that, even if she didn’t knew her very well, always left an impression. An impression made of streamers, cannons and an alligator coming right at her face, jumping from a sugar bowl. “Well, very embarrassing,” she groans.

“Pinkie is cool, but sometimes I can’t shake the feeling that those two still see me as a kid. But enough about me, you’re the one with the problem here!”

“What should I do then, Scoots? What? Go to her and tell her again how I feel? Go with a grand romantic gesture that will finally crack through that thick skull of hers and live happily ever after?”

“Yes,” she almost shouts right next to Spoon’s face. No, not almost: she totally shouts in front of her.

Spoon almost falls from the chair in surprise by the other mare’s bluntness and the booming of her voice. Her glasses slip a bit off the bridge of her nose. “That wasn’t the answer I hoped for.”

“No, but it’s the answer you need.”

“I...I need more time to think.” Diamond Tiara’s voice shouts in her head with all the intensity and despair from the night before. That speech was sincere at least. Tiara had at her most vulnerable moment ripped her broken heart from her chest so that only Spoon could see it. Words of pain and all of them caused by Applebloom. And yet she still wants her... she really needs some time to think, but this time it’s not just a cliched excuse used by a mare too scared to finally confront her feelings. It didn’t end well, but it doesn’t mean she shouldn’t at least try. ”I really do.”

“Well, I hope you think up something good,” the pegasus creaks opens the window and crawls onto the sill, “because you can’t do this to yourself.” She turns her head slowly, revealing a pitiful stare. “You deserve better.” Then, without another word, she takes off and disappears with a swoosh far away into the sky, leaving behind only the sound of beating wings.

Somehow, the pegasus words strike more than they intended to. But what is this “better” she was referring to? Something ineffable and undefined, moved only by the pity for a friend or perhaps something else? Is there anything more than she can aspire to, after a life of being just a shadow, a mirror of somepony else’s perfection?

Just pity.

Something else her and Diamond Tiara have in common: there’s always somepony to pity them when they need it.

“I wish it was simple again.” Her thoughts return to the photo and that day at Sweet Apple Acres. The thing that hurt her the most wasn’t Tiara’s reaction, but the fact that her beloved can’t even enjoy a pleasant memory, just because it happened with her around.

“She really always is the problem,” Spoon whispers with angry eyes. Only the two of them and nopony else: that is the rule. Order is the whole point of their lives and when she intruded in Tiara’s heart, that order was forever lost and destroyed the pony loves the most.The only thing that consoles her now is the fact that Spoon is once again at her side: a first step, maybe, in restoring what was lost.

She returns to her studies with some hope in her heart. Nopony ever said it was supposed to be easy, right?

“Spoon! It’s the mail! There’s something for you!” her mother yells from downstairs. She gives a sigh and lifts herself from the chair, her concentration flown out of the window. A sharp scent of flowers invades her nostrils the moment she opens the door, almost intoxicating her with its sweetness.

Dozens of red roses sit in her house’s foyer, so much that even the furniture is hidden beneath the sea of crimson. Her mother’s head leans semi-obscured by a massive bouquet, but Spoon can still notice she’s stifling a giggle.

“Looks like you have an admirer...” the older mare’s blush is hidden by the red roses. Spoon sighs and pictures in her mind an admirer with a light pink coat, completely messed up and the only pony she knows who uses such a frilly hoof-writing:

I Need You is written on a little card with a flowered engraving. It must have been so awkward taking the message to the shop.

Sure you do, she thinks.

Author's Note

Little sidestory planned about Scoots, RD and Pinkie. One does not simply try to make some continuity between fics...^^

Chapter Eight: What I wanted to hear

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter Eight: What I Wanted to hear.

“Focus, Spoon, focus,” she mutters with resolve, “she needs you. That’s all that matters.” She repeats this in her mind countless times as she approaches that dreadful mansion.

It isn’t helping.

Every hoofstep towards Tiara’s front door feels heavier than the last, almost reducing her to dragging them across the ground. The cold of the night stinging her coat doesn’t help. It’s as if Winter had hidden itself, and then decided to jump out and bite Spoon just a couple of days after their “encounter.”

Almost like an admonition.

If she was paranoid, then she would think that Scootaloo was behind this mischief. Always something to expect from that pegasus...

On the doorknob, there’s another frill adorned card, even more sappy than the last one. Countless black roses around a pink lettering that forms only a simple word: Upstairs, followed by a smiley face.

“Well, duh! Unless she moved the bedroom...” The mare takes a look around with bewildered eyes, “Who am I talking to?” She lets out an exasperated sigh.

Spoon slowly turns the doorknob, and the moment the door is opened, her nostrils are invaded by another violent whiff of disgustingly sweet flowers, even sharper than the ones delivered to her place. This time, though, she can see a long trail of rose petals traversing the living room, unevenly scattered on the floor, all the way to stairs. She takes another look around to notice the absence of the servants once again.

Well, if she wants what I think she wants...I wouldn’t want anypony else, too. She can’t help but be relieved by that: mostly because the thought of Tiara scaring more those poor fillies makes her shudder a bit. That fiery, no compromises attitude is one of the reasons she likes Tiara so much.

But everything has a limit.

An eerie silence is the only thing in the large mansion, except for the awkward hoofsteps of Spoon. She tries not to slip on the petals on the way to the bedroom, and the distant fiddling of impatient hooves echoes like a gramophone.

“You outdated piece of junk.”

An angry shrill is heard a few rooms ahead, followed by a scratching noise. Spoon suppresses a little laugh from the unexpected outburst before the silence of the manor is overridden by the sound of a violent saxophone, scratching trough her ears. The instrumental part builds up slowly as she progresses through the hallway, music working its magic through her mind, and every doubt, every sense of loss and hesitation dissipates completely. Just like that night, just like the moment she finally had the courage to whisper: “I want you, Tiara.”

Always to the point; subtlety is for the weak minded. Yet she’s too much of a coward to tell her without the music,though. It’s too soon for Tiara’s broken heart and plagued by too many unexpected consequences.

It doesn’t matter now: The only thing that matters is to relinquish her will to the mysterious force that brings them to gravitate around each other. Her love for Tiara is a manifestation of the need for order in her little world; for any kind of order they can reach, and whatever spurs her is a symptom of that.

She is there to help Tiara, to make her happy again. It’s only the two of them and nopony else, as it should be: Twin celestial bodies that stand tall in the sky, intertwined in each other’s gravitational embrace.

Her mouth waters and her heart races when she sees the door of her bedroom, their bedroom. Yet another card gently rests on the doorknob: Inside.

Somehow, Spoon knows that Tiara didn’t think much when she wrote those cards, but the thought of the pony waiting for her, yearning for her passion and comfort, who needs that as the flowers need the Sun, shakes those foalish accusations out of her head. Finally, she gives the door a little push, opening once again a gate to a world of burning desire and fulfillment, of love, lust and need. A powerful need that only that grey pony has the power to quell...

A flash of pure magenta grips her shoulder in a crushing lock and squeezes the grey with ferocious tenderness, while a messy mane with stripes of the same color nuzzles against her chest and neck.

“Spoony.”

Tiara cries of pure joy are muffled by the grey mare’s warm coat. “I missed you so much.” The other mare deepens the hug, resting her confused, little head in the nook of Spoon’s neck, just below her chin.

On reflex, Spoon hugs her too, starting to stroke her mane while the corners of her mouth go up. The scent of flowers is diminished, but a faint hint of it trails Tiara’s mane and the few flowers she put on it. A couple of simple daisies adorn her, a strange choice given the more expensive one that she purchased earlier.

A little touch of simple class that adds something more to her overall beauty, but somehow it’s a different kind of beauty. She almost looks cute: cute like a small kitten soaked in milk or the smell of rain on a Sunday morning. Like a little filly who’s trying so hard to impress, but only manages to endear those around her.

Tiara in a nutshell, really.

That goofy, almost timid smile she wears is just icing on the cake. So much, that Spoon almost strains in mirroring it, swept away by the sheer energy she transmits. “Well, gee, Tiara...” she adds with a nervous chuckle, “you just saw me a couple of days and—”

“It’s always too long!” She brushes her cheek against Spoon’s chest with enthusiasm. ”I thought so much about you and everything and...and...” She lifts herself on her hindlegs and gives a quick but intense kiss on Spoon’s lips.

A second that almost lasts a century passes through her mind, losing herself in the blue sea of delight that her kisses always bring; sloppy, uncaring, careless kisses, far from the desperate tenderness or almost animalistic fervor she shows.

Tender. She never thought that this word could describe the Tiara she knows now. But she is, so very much. It’s a change so sudden, but at the same time so pleasing. A pony made of contradictions that keeps shoving new ones is in front of her, a pony very much different from anything that she’s ever seen or expected.

It’s almost scary.

Still shocked by the aftermath of the kiss, Spoon blinks a few times and gazes into the expectant look of the still beaming mare below her. ”Are you okay, Tiara?”

“I’m great, Spoony!” she shouts, her expression of manic glee unchanged. “Like, super great. Never been better.”

“It’s just that you seemed so...” Spoon bites her lip while the other mare keeps the same grin, “so different these past couple of days.” You were a wreck! It almost leaps out of Spoon’s mouth, but she doesn’t have the courage to say it. It would be mean, of course, but there are other ways to describe such a jarring change.

“Well, duh. Two days ago are not today, right?” She gives the grey mare another strong hug, before hopping to the flower covered bed. She lets herself fall on her back like a brick before patting the empty space beside her, inviting Spoon as she absentmindedly stares at the ceiling in silence. When she approaches her, though, Tiara still wears that satisfied smile.

Spoon sits next to Tiara, curling her legs beneath and resting on her belly. She lays there in silence; the moment of calm is interrupted only by the gentle kisses Tiara plants on her grey hoof. A more modest touch than the one Spoon would have preferred, but somehow still welcome. Spoon could swear that this sensation isn’t new, like something she has already seen or felt in a dream. A dream at Tiara’s side, perhaps?

Spoon’s hoof wanders to her friend’s cheek before she breaks the silence, “You think I’m weird, don’t you? Is that it?”

If Spoon had been drinking something at the moment, she would’ve spit it out in surprise, “N-No! Why are you thinking that I'm thinking that-I mean...” The earth mare’s sharp mind wobbles instantly, her defenses breached once more by the mischievous pony at her side.

“Yes, you do. I mean, I was a total crybaby back then and now...” she gives a long sigh, “I’ve been thinking... lately.”

“Didn’t you say, and I quote, that thinking is dumb?” She adds a little giggle to ease the tension she feels in the air. Tiara’s icy blue eyes just keep staring at the nothingness above her.

“I am dumb, Spoony. I’m like the Queen of dumb ponies.” She gives a little stomp on the bed with a hoof, pouting.

“You shouldn’t say that. Why do you think this?” Even though Spoon’s hoof is grasping Tiara’s with tender care, her mind dips into her injured core and finds something spiteful.

Now you get it?

She shakes the thought off and returns it back to the dark corners of her mind where it belongs. She shouldn’t feel so hurt, not after all Tiara had gone through...

...Maybe.

“Because I am, Spoony. Simple as that.” She turns herself onto her belly, still keeping a firm grasp on her friend’s foreleg that almost hurts, but Spoon doesn’t dare pull herself away. “I made you cry.”

“What?”

“At the club, remember? We had that fight over that stupid photo and I made you cry.” Her voice cracks, almost like she’s starting to cry herself. Spoon rushes to her side, crawling on the bed to touch her flank with her own.

“Still thinking about that? I got over it, but-”

“I hurt you, Spoon. You wanted to cheer me up and I hurt you. I’ve hurt too many ponies in my life and liked it; I’ve hurt ponies that cared about me and the icing on the cake was you.” She lets another desperate sigh before holding the bridge of her nose with a hoof.

”I’m sorry.”

She gives a quick push on her forelegs and swings them around Spoon’s shoulders. Warm tears rile up her grey coat for a fleeting instant. Spoon wears a content smile and returns the hug, basking in the warmth of her beloveds coat.

“You don’t need to-”

“Yes, I do. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” She gives Spoon’s chin a little caress. “You’re the only pony I never wanted to hurt, but I did it anyway. You said you were to used to it, though. But I never hurt you before.”

“Oh, that.” For some reason, Spoon’s memory of that evening is muddled and distant. Everything before kissing Tiara is in black and white, grainy and completely faded, like a corrupted film reel. As if the only memory worth preserving is the pony that rests below her muzzle. “What I meant before was, that,” she bites her lip, mustering the courage, “I was expecting it.”

“Huh?” Tiara loosens her grip a little.

“You were still fresh from all of those awful things, you lost so much and getting a smile from you was going to be more difficult than I thought. I had to try, at least. I didn’t know you would think about her because of it.”

“Oh, right. Bloom.” Tiara’s face darkens and her voice slightly cracks when saying that name.

The grey mare would slap herself right now, after repeating the same mistake twice. She expects rage, the fury of a storm of pent up frustration, screaming and hurting. Hurting both of them.

Instead...Nothing. She just gives a little sigh and rolls Spoon onto her back, resting her head on the grey mare’s chest.

“I need closure, Spoony,” Tiara mutters. “I’m tired of this. It has to end.”

Silver Spoon just listens in silence, starting to stroke Tiara’s mane as she always does. As she loves to do. It may seem patronizing to some, but showing this kind of modest affection, this touch that is not as intimate as the one she’s been giving her lately, is soothing for both. Spoon has felt her nervous breaths against her coat so many times that starting this routine is enough to calm her nerves.

“What am I doing with my life? Answer me truthfully, Spoony: What have I accomplished right now?”

“Well, um, you have a great—”

“Moping. Moping and hurting the ones I love: That’s what I’m good for.” She buries herself in Spoon’s coat further.

Spoon can feel another little trickle of tears riling her belly. The grey mare was going to say: you have a great friend that loves you more than you can imagine...

“Geez, Tiara. Still thinking about it. I accept your apology and—”

“That night. I used you. And I didn’t think twice about it.”

Spoon’s delicate touch stops, as does her mind. She nudges Tiara away from her chest so she can stare into her eyes. The thought of telling the truth burns her insides, but it must to be told if their lives will ever return to normal.

“I know,” she says in a simple and solemn tone, “I knew the whole time.”

“And I said I would keep using you.”

“I was there, remember?”

“You told me that you love me. And I spat on it even though I wanted every sliver I could get. Even though your love is everything to me. It’s all I have left.”

“You’re too harsh on yourself. It wasn’t like that.” The words a slight bitter taste in Spoon’s mouth. Anything and everything to make Tiara feel better...

This is not my role, Spoon thinks. But...What if she really wants to..?

“It was to me! I’m tired of destroying everypony I love! I used you and I was damn proud of it!” she growls, contorting her delicate visage into a fury that a pony shouldn’t reserve for herself. Her gentle contour shakes in outrage and her hoof grasps at the sheets, eager to punch the face of this Diamond Tiara that keeps bucking everything up. ”I used you like a toy, to get rid of once I’m tired of it.”

“I didn’t mind!” Spoon yells, “I didn’t see it like that. It meant something to me! A lot! I’m here to make you happy, Tiara! I love you!” Spoon sees her friend, the pony that means so much to her, slipping away. She sees her returning to the cold abyss of despair that spurred her to such desperate acts. Acts in which they shared that moment...The grey mare feels horrible, a monster, because she comes to the realization that she wants her to suffer...just so she can be with her.

Spoon shakes and collapses in tears, as if a sharp piece of glass has stabbed her in the gut.

“I’m not worthy of your love,” Tiara continues. A sad smile, so sad that it almost can’t be defined as a smile, but a sign of peaceful resignation, follows. “I’m just a wrecked, faltering, mess of a pony and I won’t drag you to hell with me. I’m poison...Poison for the ones I love....”

“Why did you sent me the flowers?” whispers, Spoon keeping her head down. The sheets beneath her dampen of the slow tears she sheds.

“Because I thought it would be nice. I needed you, yes, but just because I wanted to tell you I’m sorry.” She sighs, deeply irritated, “I couldn’t do better, right?”

“Why the flowers, then? And the music?”

“To make you comfortable. Because I couldn’t think of anything better. Because I’m an idiot. An idiot who thinks with that thing between her legs...,Tiara slumps down on her bed and distorts her gaze from Spoon, staring at her bedside.

Spoon faces it as well and tears of joy rile up her cheeks when she sees it: Their photo stands there in a golden, elegant frame. That little moment of happiness stands repaired, at least for one more night, and in her room... Tiara’s room...

“That’s why I couldn’t find it anymore,” Spoon says, heart hammering into her chest and swelling for the love that she feels for the mare with the sad smile.

“It is something worth remembering. You are worth remembering, always. And I’ve ruined it.”

“I’m still here, right?” She adds a nervous chuckle to the tears. “If you had ruined it I wouldn’t be.”

“Because you’re too wonderful for the likes of me. I’m the first to admit that I like sex. I love being held, loved and caressed. I love being touched by another mare and touching her. The night felt so cold before I knew that I could share it with somepony else. I’m empty inside, empty of love and I had to grovel and manipulate you to have yours, after I lost Bloom’s.”

Tiara’s soul lies bare before her and Spoon can clearly see a bloody gash torn into her heart, bleeding pain. It always leads back to her and it’s not right...

“I should have been with you...” she mutters, her thoughts slipping from somewhere deep inside her, uncaring if they reach Tiara’s ears or not.

The magenta mare, though, perceives it very clearly and her jaw is left hanging.

“I should have told you from the start. I could’ve made you happy. Happier than you would’ve been with her. I would’ve never hurt you like that! Before you met her!”

“Spoony...” She reaches for her cheek before Silver pins her down on her back. Tiara gulps nervously and her blue eyes quiver. Petals fly and scatter all over the room from the bed.

“I would’ve never left you. Not like that. I was jealous of her, Tiara; I wanted you for so long, ever since you kissed me under that tree.” Her red eyes quiver before drowning in a sea of tears that cascades unto Tiara’s chest, adding to her amazement.

“You were my first k-kiiiisss!” Spoon sobs, her voice the sound of broken glass.”And I just wanted to kiss you more and more, but I couldn’t. I didn’t know what to do next because I was little and dumb and I loved hanging out with you and...and...”

Spoon’s soul is bare, just like she saw Tiara that night. It’s only fair that her love should see her like that. “You were my first...” she blurts out. “Well, ya know.”

“Oh, Spoon...You know I kind of suspected it, but you were so good that...” nervous and desperate laughs punctuate her speech, “I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I want you too...I want it to be different.”

“I like being hurt by you. It’s okay. I’l do everything you ask, anything to see you smile.”

“No, Spoony. It’s not right. Not at your expense. I’d rather die than see you like that.” She cups Spoon’s cheeks in her hooves and gazes deeply in her eyes. She removes with a delicate movement her glasses and places them on her forehead, so she can plant a kiss on the grey mare’s forehead.

“I want you to stay out of your own will. Not because of little tricks.” She brushes off the daisies from her mane, letting a long lock fall into her eye.”Not because I’m too weak to let go, but because you want it. Just what the mare, Silver Spoon, wants.”

This tender edge taking a hold of Tiara approaches its apex. Spoon sees her for the first time as really vulnerable, exposed and hurt and not taking advantage of it. Neither does Spoon, neither of them feels used. Fulfilled is the word she is looking for, fulfillment is what they got.

Just because you want it.

For once, Silver Spoon thinks of her own happiness. For once she remembers a lifetime of two ponies just having each other and being content, a love great enough to reach the stars. If her happiness is Tiara...then there’s nothing wrong with that.

For once, she takes destiny in her own hooves and chooses to stay in Tiara’s warm embrace, not because it’s her duty, but because this is what she desires. She yearns for it, having spent to many lonely nights alone and longing. It feels so right that it almost hurts, overwhelmed by the thriving force of life that this sentiment blesses her with. If this is the kind of pain she has to endure, Silver Spoon can live with that...

...And with Tiara...

The kiss they share is so tender, so sweet that it feels like the first. Or at least it was done right. Tiara’s smooth lips feel like a blessing, a romantic fantasy that comes true without any of the painfully reality. The broken mare feels like putty and Tiara takes a hold of her hooves, gently pushing her back onto the bed.

Spoon’s hooves run trough her feminine, slender curves and withers– locked in a tight embrace. Their kiss breaks for just the time Tiara needs to ask her something.

“Please, tell me this is real.”

“It always was.” She picks up one of the fallen daisies on the sheets and quietly places it back on Tiara’s mane, accompanying the gesture with a sweet kiss on her cheek. “This is all I need: just you.”

“I love you too,” a tearful laugh follows from the mare, “I should’ve said it before...” Tiara sniffles. “Back there in the garden...I should’ve kissed you, held you and never let go...”

“It’s not too late.” She locks lips with Tiara again, who barely resisting, fully accepting every bit of passion the grey mare holds. The absolute power of that kiss, the kiss only the two of them can share, shatters the shackles of pain, doubt and limitations. Their tongues meet and whisper tender nothings to each other: Everything, everything is possible in their world. At least for this moment the past is barely visible and the future shines as bright as the stars.

Silver Spoon finally has her special somepony.

Their lips part again, and start to softly explore each other’s face in slow, deliberate, butterfly kisses. Spoon tries to suppress a joyous laugh to better concentrate on her task as her lips reach the nook of Tiara’s neck, drawing out a lustful moan.

She grins and keeps on, mixing her soft kisses with daring bites, playful nibs to quench Tiara’s thirst and make her yearn for more. For once, it’s her lover that is on the receiving end and Spoon takes full advantage of it. Her tongue teases and taunts, exploring Diamond Tiara with mirth, indulging on every spot that raises her voice, just an octave, or warms the treasure between her legs.

An academic fervor overwhelms Spoon, and for a second Spoon the lover detaches from Spoon the intellectual. The latter continues her research almost coldly, gently rolling Tiara onto her side and enjoying the view of her sex between her still clenched hind legs.

The mare gives a tentative, deliberate caress, starting from the lower part of Tiara’s lips to her taint sex, causing the spoiled mare to explode into an ecstatic cry. Spoon looks at her hoof and sees the faint glisten of Tiara’s nectar. Listening to the latest in a bold streak of thoughts, she gives a lick to enjoy Tiara’s bittersweet essence.

“Who’s the lightweight now?” she giggles, basking in this new found craving she has found. She’s never been on top, but by Celestia she’s going to enjoy it.

“I am!” Tiara chirps, completely at her mercy. “I’m such a lightweight, ravish me. Oh, look at your hoof.” She nonchalantly points at her own juices on Spoon’s foreleg, “It’s so disgraceful! Just disgraceful!” She kicks a foreleg onto the bed while holding a hoof to her forehead in a hurt fashion. “Punish me! Punish me, my grey mistress! I am yours to defile!”

Spoon stops, jaw dropped to the floor, the mood of the moment completely spoiled. A nervous chuckle escapes her lips. “Um...Ok. I really wasn’t expecting that...” A a drop of cold sweat crosses her brow, to the dismay of Tiara.

“Well, I guess I had to try something, um, new.” Tiara tries to hide her marehood by clinching further her legs, but is stopped by Spoon’s wicked grin and her breath on her nethers.

“Not so fast, sweetie...” Spoon growls and lets her tongue run loose on the surface of Tiara’s pink treasure, bathing her lower lips of her unquenched lust, savoring every last drop of the nectar can’t renounce. The magenta mare’s hindlegs flail and kick, only to be stopped by Silver Spoon gentle grip. Her forehooves brush against her inner tights and spread her legs further to delve deeper and deeper, reaping from Tiara’s carnal satisfaction.

Diamond howls and moans with no shame, further fueling her swinging, voracious tongue. Her voice shrieks and vibrates with every lick, echoing the sound of her passion to the stars.

“Oh yes! Take me now, like you never did! Whohooo!” Their gazes meet again, only that Spoon’s can’t be defined as such: It’s a glare of challenge. Spoon’s obscene slurping is a promise to the spoiled mare, pledging her more than the petty possessions strewn about the lavish mansion. Her mouth fully encloses Tiara’s outer lips in an embrace that is tender, yet crude and sloppy. Spoon’s tongue flails one last time before separating itself from Tiara’s flesh. Before the mare can scream and beg more from her lover, her hoof moves down to her secret spot and brushes it, smearing more liquid onto herself.

Spoon doesn’t think as she mashes it with both hooves, soaking up all the bitter juices with voracious greed before letting her tongue get one final taste of her beloved. Moved by a desperate desire, her haunches move on their own and rocket themselves toward Tiara’s dripping treasure.

Once again united as one, Spoon feels complete. Wrapped in a tender genital embrace, she works at a much softer pace than they’re both used to, rubbing their sexes with a gentle edge to savour the contact of every inch against inch. Spoon works slowly, wanting the moment to last, delaying the moment when the pressure building in her haunches will reach its peak and will turn her in a deluded animal, wasting this precious moment for gratuitous carnal satisfaction. A thought lightens her heart,though: Tiara’s gentle smile of pleasure, far from the drooling maniac of their other times, and her tender words tell her they have all the time they need.

In the midst of the tempest of bliss wrecking them both, Tiara steels herself and bites her lip, managing to whisper a single word.

“W-wait...”

Her hips separate from Spoon’s own with a sensation almost painful for the grey mare, craving for more of that blessed contact.

The magenta mare leans herself down and starts searching under the bed, eliciting a curious eyebrow raise from Silver Spoon. Tiara reemerges from the lavender depths, holding in her hoof a plastic, double edged blue dildo.

Spoon gulps, frankly intimidated while her love gives an awkward grin.

“Like it, Spoony?”

The grey mare nods, never taking her eyes off the ridiculous flare...both of them. She doesn’t fail to notice the brutal thickness, and yet the sleek plastic surface posses an almost elegant length.

Tiara waves it around, and her eyes dance with it as she keeps talking, “You know, I just got it yesterday, and I was thinking how about me and you . . . ya know . . .” She sighs. “Now I bet I’ll look like an idiot, I mean more of an idiot, which I would be If i tried to use this alone and...”

With a sharp move, Spoon closes the distance between her mouth and her own, making her special somepony still herself and relax in the kiss, joyously moaning into her mouth. The item is still firmly grasped in her hoof, though. Spoon groans in her mind and just accepts the situation. If it is with Tiara, then maybe...

Their kiss breaks before Spoon grips Tiara in a tender embrace. She whispers into her ear, “I’m okay with that. Don’t worry.”

Mad glee possesses Diamond Tiara as she roughly shoves Spoony onto her back with a giggle. She awkwardly stands on her hind legs above the still nervous grey mare and gingerly grabs the item, positioning it with meticulous care in front of her sex. The tip of one end grazes against her pink wetness and makes a weak squelching noise while a few drops fall onto the sheet. Tiara grunts and gives a little push as the dildo slurps inside with ease, her face contorting into a grin of pleasure as the blue shaft disappears inch by inch inside her.

Spoon wants to say something, anything, but she’s too busy mesmerized. This contorted imagery of equine anatomy and plastic coming together just to pleasure a couple of ponies is something unnatural, but oh so rewarding to see...and to feel. Tiara finishes her job and finds herself the owner of a gigantic, blue plastic cock. She pants and glares at Spoon with a satisfied grin, causing her heart to race some more as the fire in her haunches rises.

“Now, how did this did work again...”

Tiara slumps down on bed and spreads her legs, allowing the plastic stallion flare to flop a little as she supports herself with one foreleg. With a nod, she she gestures to Spoon to mirror her position and the grey mare obeys, exposing her glistening sex to Tiara, which she eyes with greed.

Diamond Tiara takes a hold of the dildo while Spoon inches closer to the tip of the other end. The blessed contact happens when her outer lips feel the cold chill of plastic. She bites her lip, trying not to yelp while she takes another look at the plastic length.

The terribly faithful replica even has a thick ring at the halfway length; it goes on and on for what what seems an eternity before penetrating Tiara right where it’s framed by her curvy, round flanks. A strange sense of continuity between the two hits the mare like a hurricane, as if the penis is the one thing that can unite their bodies and hearts as one.

When she feels the tip breaching into her, she spasms. Her need to be filled for more and more rages.

The item slurps into her and makes a faint pop through a sharp thrusting of Tiara’s hips, and Spoon’s crotch muscles relax on a reflex. Waves of pleasure rock and ripple through her body in a harmonic contrast of pain and pleasure, of male and female anatomy, driving her to want more.

She clenches her muscles around the dildo as it pushes in and out of her a few times, only to give a hip thrust of her own, repaying the favor and ramming it deep into Tiara.

Tiara’s face goes mad with carnal bliss for a few moments, before she regains control and mirrors Spoon’s daring deed, passing to each other the plastic end and ramming it into each other. They hit their respective ultimate depths at an almost malicious pace, rubbing with a crazed hoof their clits.

The moment of the truth mounts and builds inside Spoon’s body as she feels her own excitement wrecking and destroying every trace of rationality with extreme prejudice, almost descending into a carnal madness, sharper than ever before. All of this is heightened by the fact that she can really feel Tiara. Every thrust, every movement of her flesh, every ounce of pleasure is shared between the two of them in mind, body and spirit.

The pressure reaches its peak, and their orgasms explode and annihilate the outside world, leaving just that beautiful, tender feeling that the two of them will share for eternity. Spoon slumps down and just smiles once the plastic slides out of her body, leaving her insides fastidiously empty, but her heart full of love.

A love she never dared to grasp for herself, but that Tiara wanted and reaped with mirth. A love that manifests itself in Diamond Tiara crawling, exhausted, to her side and embracing her, before planting a sweet kiss on her forehead, almost like a trademark of her affection.

She returns the hug with gusto as tears if joy rile up her cheeks. “I love you, Tiara,” she whispers.

“I love you, too. I want to be worthy of your love...” Tiara deepens the hug with all the strength she has left. “I need to.”

“You already are, Tiara. I forgive you.”

“But I don’t if...” she pants, “I can’t forgive myself for all of this. I still have to find closure.”

“I’ll help you if you want. If this will make you happy, I’ll do it.”

Tiara giggles. A true laugh, filled with real joy, the likes of which Spoon has not heard in a long time. “You’re the best thing that's ever happened to me. My best friend, somepony that loves me so much and I love in return...You’re my world Spoony.” She kisses her again, sweeter than the last time, “I’m yours forever.”

It’s too perfect to be real, Spoon thinks. This time is the real thing, though. The magical, perfect moment she always waited to have with her special somepony and now here is it; nopony and nothing can take this from her. Not even her.

“Spoony...” Tiara blushes a bit, “ I know it’s a bit sudden, but...” she bites her lip, “I have to go out of town for, I don’t know, a couple of days and I’d like for you to keep me some company. I don’t know If I can do it alone.”

“Of course, Tiara! Where are you going?”

“It’s about finding closure, but I still don’t know where. Once I do this, I don’t know what will happen, but I think we’re going to have a chance. I have to take this burden off my chest.”

An unknown fear takes a hold of the grey mare, a shadow that looms over her heart without mercy or warning. Her world feels like it’s going to break.

“What is it?” she gulps

“Do you remember that blank flank pegasus? The one in the weather team? She came to me the other day and...”

Nononononononononononononononononononono...

“She told me where Bloom is...”

It ends.

Her happiness ends that moment. Joy is replaced by a faint hope. Hope to have a little thing called revenge.

Author's Note

So, we're reaching the end, dearies. Sorry for the late update, but life and Christmas got in the way.

Chapter 9: The Simplest of Truths

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 9: The simplest of truths

“So...You two?” Spoon points a grey hoof at the two mares sitting on the floor in front of her, nodding with a content grin. “Are a couple?”

The two mares nod in unison again and they say with one voice, “Yes!”

Tiara giggles at Bloom’s timing, who mirrors the yellow mare’s laughter with glee. The young mare sees her best friend bent over, almost gagging, and trying to not be noticed by the two very few confused.

And failing miserably, of course.

“Is this some kind of prank? Is it? It must be.” Spoon adds a desperate chuckle, “Now somepony is going to burst from that door and take a photo of the dopey face I’m making. I bet it’s priceless!” Her eye twitches while a crazed grin appears on her face.

“Does she does that all the time? Ah’m starting to worry,” Bloom asks.

“The twitchy eye is a new thing, actually. Gee, calm down a bit, Spoony. It isn’t that strange,” says Tiara, waving a hoof at her friend and tenderly grasping Bloom’s own with the other causing a little smile escapes from the cream colored mare.

“Well, it kinda is. No, not kinda; it’s like...I don’t know, it’s like the rules of the universe somehow got turned upside down,” Silver Spoon rants, pacing back and forth in the room to the utter indifference of other two.

Tiara shrugs while the farmpony just watches bamboozled. “Is she a’right?” she whispers.

“Give her a few minutes,” the magenta mare answers cooly.

“I mean...” Spoon starts ventilating, “What if I got hooked up with the other one, Scootaloo?”

“Ah think it would be cute...” Bloom mutters, in a way so innocent so as to make the grey mare glare.

“Oh, is that her name?” Tiara looks above absentminded and almost shocked. “I’ve called her Girl-Featherweight all those years!”

“Must have been really awkward,” Bloom mumbles earning an eye roll from her marefriend.

“The thing is...” Spoon continues, her braid almost loosening itself out of sheer disbelief, “The thing is I’m just surprised, that’s all. No, actually it isn’t.” She falls flat on her haunches and stares at the floor. “How did this happen?”

“Well, gee...” Tiara scratches the back of her head and holds her chin. “I guess like any love story happens: You find your special somepony in the last place you would expect,” she latches herself onto the farmpony, squeezing her in an affectionate, unashamed embrace, “in the last pony you would expect.”

“Ah was starting to worry at the lack of that part...” Bloom rolls her eyes, but still has the time for a quick chortle, to which the spoiled mare responds by sticking out her tongue.

Silver Spoon rubs at her belly with a grimace.

“What’s wrong?” asks Bloom with concern.

“All this sappyness is making me sick...” Spoon groans. “Don’t get me wrong, T: I’m happy for you, but I still can’t believe my own eyes. It seems like only yesterday you two were at each other’s throat and now...well, you’re at each other’s...” The grey mare gives herself a little slap before adjusting her glasses and holding the bridge of her nose, “Celestia forgive me for the joke I was going to make...”

“I’m sure she will, Spoony.” She waves a hoof with nonchalance before her easygoing attitude dissolves into a grimace of concern. “You know, there’s another reason I wanted you here, besides being my best friend, of course.”

“What is it?” Spoon quickly eyes the couple.

“You’re the only one that knows about us. Besides me and Bloom, obviously.” Tiara’s marefriend just nods at the statement, unsure. Something in her gut still tells her that it’s better for Tiara to deal with her friend, lest she want to complicate the situation further. She can see the grey mare’s distrust of her, even after all those years, like a black aura radiating from her.

“The thing is, I want you to keep the secret from everypony”, Tiara continues, “that’s it. Nopony else has to know. At least for now.”

“Well, It’s not like once I knew I was going to plaster the news all over Equestria, you know.”

“Just promise me Spoony. It’s really important this time.”

“Pinkie Promise!” adds Bloom, raising a hoof. It’s the most serious swear she can imagine. She smirks at the memories it brings, even though the other two mares can’t possibly have a clue about what she is talking about.

“Pinkie what?” Spoon blinks. “Is that baker in on this, too? So it is a prank, I knew i—”

“No, no. It’s just something ah care about. Ah mean, ah want you to keep the secret, so you need to do the Pinkie Pie swear.”

Tiara appears hopelessly lost in all of this, but she gives a nod of approval to her.

“Do this and repeat: Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye,” she crosses her chest and lightly pokes her eye, making a squishy sound.

Spoon rolls her eyes and groans at the formula, cycling through the gestures like a soulless, bored automaton. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. There, you happy now?”

“Thanks, Spoony,” she finally says. “It means a lot to us what you did.” Bloom just smiles through all this. Seeing Tiara so determined, so willing to make this work, lights a warm, fuzzy kindling in her heart. Over and over, her beloved had said she had grown up, and over and over Bloom could do nothing but nod along. But seeing this with her own amber eyes... She doesn’t want to pity her, but at least that sad, spoiled mare deserves a shot at happiness. Everypony does...and she will be helping, of course.

“I just did it for you, you know. Surely not for the ‘Polychromatic flank formerly knows as Blank Flank’ here.”

“Can ah smack her a little bit?” Bloom asks, hooves shaking as she and Spoon exchange a vicious glare.

“No, please girls!! I’d like to keep this conversation as peaceful as possible. Besides, you don’t get angry anymore when I call you blank flank...” Tiara lifts herself off the floor and comes in between the two mares, interrupting their line of view.

“When it comes from ya it’s cute!” Bloom throws an accusatory hoof towards Spoon, “She’s jus’ trying to upset me.”

“And I’m doing it very well. Go me,” Spoon deadpans, her voice as dry as possible, even raising her hoof in the air as a victory gesture with no sentiment at all.

“Please girls, can’t you just get along, at least for now? Can you do it for me?” Tiara throws a pair of puppy dog, shimmering eyes, making her best friend instantly recoil and her Applebloom quiver with a cuteness.

“Heh...” Bloom sighs, “Ah can’t say no to those eyes.”

“You’re right, It’s like they’re hypnotizing or something.” Spoon adjust her glasses to mask one little sneer toward the rural mare. “I guess I’ll do it for you, Tiara, as usual. But there’s a question I really need to ask.”

“What is it?” Tiara cocks an eyebrow.

“Why the secret? I mean, I can understand the social stigma of being a fillyfooler, but—”

“I’m not a fillyfooler,” Tiara lashes out with a venomous glare.

“Erm, Tiara, ah think this is the right word, but—” Bloom tries to say, but Tiara’s blue orbs of hate swivel towards her. A glim of sadness is barely etched in them, one that curbs her violent edge.

“I don’t want to be called that,” Tiara lets out a throaty sob, “I don’t want to hear that word, at least not from you two.”

The other two mares exchange a knowing look and slightly nod in agreement. That sad, little mare with will always be their common ground, their truce.

“Why is that, Tiara?” Spoon asks, reaching out and placing a reassuring hoof on her shoulder.

“Ah think ah know...” Bloom mirrors Spoon’s affectionate gesture, holding Diamond Tiara between the two ponies that matter the most to her. As Bloom predicted, their presence shine a light on her face and finally summons the word that confirms everything.

“It’s because of Daddy,” she whispers. “How do you think he would react finding out that not only his wife, but his daughter are...that word?” Tiara sighs, cracking a collected facade. She slumps down to the ground and looks at her forehooves, powerless and exhausted. “I don’t know what to do. Maybe I should hide and hope for the best...”

“You know, Tiara...” Spoon scratches the back of her head and plays with her braid. “How long do you two want to keep up this charade?”

“This what?” Bloom tilts an eyebrow.

“This lie,” Tiara blurts out without any subtlety, still staring at the floor. For some reason, Bloom still prefers the words that she can’t understand. They can’t hurt her, that way.

“Oh...” Bloom’s gaze lowers as well, and she reaches for Tiara, stroking her mane and removing a loose lock from her forehead. “As long as necessary. Not forever, of course.”

“But it kind of is, isn’t it?”

Silence falls between the three mares, as the realization hits harder than a bullet. Bloom’s plans seem foalish and irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

“He thinks we’re just friends...” the yellow mare looks out the window, “she can always find an excuse to go visit a friend, right?”

“But then, you’ll have to keep it hidden from your siblings as well, since they don’t know either, right?”

“Well...” Bloom scratches her chin in embarrassment, causing the other girls to slap their own foreheads in a synchronized thwack. “Ah just couldn’t find the words.” The night before was the perfect moment, but now the farmpony realizes it with deep shame. The night where they became real mares...With regret, she understand that a real mare should tell the truth.

Tiara gives out a long, exasperated sigh. “Back at square one, are we? Excuses, lies... hiding it from two ponies instead of three. Guess it could be easier, then.”

“It would still be a lie, and ah’m tired of lies!” Bloom yells, smashing a hoof into the floor, startling the other two mares from their sorrow induced stupor. “Tiara!”

The farmpony runs toward Diamond and holds her hooves in her own, causing the mare to look bewildered with her pupils comically shot up. “Are ya ashamed of me?”

“W-what? Of course not!” she shouts in complete panic, as if Bloom just suggested her to devour a live foal.

“Well, neither do ah!” Spoon choughs when she says that and Applebloom can almost hear the words between the breaks in the violent fit.

That would be the day.

She shakes off the thought (reminding herself to smack Spoon just a bit, when she has some time) and focuses again on her marefriend’s quivering blue orbs. “I’m proud of being with you! And ah want all of Equestria knows of this!”

“But what about Dad—”

“Ya said he feels better and he’s always been a good stallion, righ’? He always was a friend of mah family and ah think you’re worrying too much about it!”

“Not to mention the way he looks at your sister...” Tiara mutters with a smarmy grin and a wink towards Silver Spoon. The grey mare returns it, leaving Applebloom in the dark.

“Ah really don’t know where ya’re getting to...but mah point remains. Wouldn’t it be better if he saw ya happy for once? Wouldn’t it be better he saw that smile of yours that ya wear when you’re with me?” Tears rile up her wide smile as the words flow out of her mouth. She likes to think her plea is guided by a mysterious and benevolent force, a force that cheers for them, that spurs them to be better. ”Couldn’t ya use that big mouth of yours, to say that you want to be happy with me?”

Broken and vulnerable, the yellow mare finds herself in the potent and loving embrace of somepony who had really had enough of being hurt. Tiara’s hugs her in an unbreakable bond, it’s her way of saying I’m not letting you go. Bloom trusted her and found her trust repaid with a gesture, simple yet powerful. Even Silver Spoon, brash and annoying like few others, visibly blushes at the sight of their sentiment.

“I will tell him.” Tiara’s solemn look is just the cherry on top of their promise. “And you want to know when?”

Bloom simply nods.

“I didn’t know the right time to say it, but...me and Daddy are leaving next week.” A tearful smile appears on Tiara’s face. “We’re going home, we’re going to be a family again and you will be part of it.”

“Tiara!” The joy in her heart seeps through every inch of her body and overwhelms the rural mare, forcing her to share it through Tiara’s lips, so her lover can catch a taste of it directly from the source. Their kiss is vibrant, violent and sloppy. Each other’s hooves run along their respective curves as the slender physique of Tiara is gently pushed onto the floor by Bloom’s exuberance. She wants Tiara, she wants her forever and she’s ready to reape and satisfy this need right now...

Right under Silver Spoon’s embarrassed and terrified gaze.

The grey mare radiates crimson from her cheeks, barely hidden by her raised foreleg. “Don’t mind me, please. I’ll be gone in a minute...on the floor, passed out...”

The loving pair compose themselves almost immediately, bolting to their feet from the floor. The two return with fluid movements at standing apart and remaining awkwardly at opposites ends of the room. Their eyes dared not dart towards the other, lest she catch a glimpse of the foalish crimson around their cheeks.

“Sorry, Spoon...” Tiara mutters between nervous giggles. “Please ignore what was about to happen...”

“Sorry about that...” Bloom mumbles. She always thought to be, if not the most patient of ponies, at least possesing a better...demeanor, as Tiara always called it. Having a fancy marefriend means learning a lot of fancy words. Not that she’s complaining, though: it’s the least she could do for her. The demeanour, that is...

“You know,” Spoon chuckles, still behind her foreleg, “I’ll do my part about the secret thing, but you two are not helping if you do that everywhere!”

“Well, she’s right. I don’t know how we did keep this up for so long.”

“Ya did nothing to stop me, of course,” Bloom remarks with a sly grin to which Tiara responds with a scoff and a blush, turning her back from the yellow mare. A sad look is etched in Bloom’s marefriend eyes after that sigh, and she turns toward her grey friend with hesitation.

“So, Spoony...” Tiara switches her gaze between her hooves and Bloom repeatedly, almost like one of them could provide better words to say in that moment. “Are you okay with this?”

“Uh? Why are you asking me?” Silver looks shocked, adjusting her glasses with a hoof again.

“You’re my best friend, my only friend.” Something in Bloom’s heart almost weeps at this sentence. She realizes that all the ponies that matter for her in this world are under this roof...and only one of them is allowed to know the truth. The truth that makes her happy.

Seeing Tiara’s heart exposed like this to somepony else should not bother her so much when that pony is Silver Spoon. If her friends were there, she would act the same with Scoots and Sweetie.

Then why? Why does she feel her blood boil when Tiara reaches for the other mare’s shoulder? Why does she feel so jealous of them, jealous of Tiara basking in her embrace, jealous of sharing her happiness with her best friend and receiving her blessing?

Why does she see more than she should and suffer for it? The relief on Tiara’s beautiful face quells everything negative that blossomed in her in that moment. The moment she hears that mare say Thank you, Spoony with a smile so peaceful and innocent, seeing in that smile everything she loves about her is worth it. Bloom remains so abashed at the sight of Tiara earning a much needed space that she fails to notice when is right in front of her eyes until it’s too late to do something.

A gleam.

A gleam in Spoon’s eyes of something terrible and undefined. Something that makes her eye twitch for just a brief moment and makes the grey pony bite her lip, so hard that a small drop of blood falls from the side of her mouth. She rubs a eye to see that if it’s real, until Spoon’s bespectacled gaze is mere inches from her.

“Applebloom, can I speak to you for just a sec?” Silver asks, completely calm, hiding the source of that gleam with an uncanny calm and panache, keeping it masterfully hidden to her still very relieved best friend.

“Y-yeah, sure,” Bloom gulps, suddenly afraid. Of what? This is just Silver Spoon, right? But what does she know about her, really? Every hoofstep they take towards the door makes a menacing sound. A thunder is even heard in the distance while Tiara waves a hoof at her, lost in foalish glee.

Once the two are out, Spoon slams the door closed with a hindleg and very coldly removes her glasses with a hoof. She breathes upon a lense and polishes it on her coat. The gleam returns with a vengeance and her little eyes narrow in a bad omen.

Bloom gathers her courage, brushing aside the ridiculous gestures from the pampered and arrogant pony, and speaks.

“So, what ya wanted to say—”

A grey flash shoves her with violence against the wall. Applebloom finds herself pinned by a pair of surprisingly strong hooves, belonging to a pony that wears a mask of tears and rage, peeling and cracking the composed exterior to reveal...something that Bloom, in her simple life, had prayed to never see and lacks the word to describe.

“If you do something to hurt her, anything...” Spoon teeth are clenched like a savage beast, “I’ll kill you!”

Surprised and terrified by this jarring change, Bloom tries to articulate some words out of her paralyzed mouth. “W-wha-”

“It’s that simple!” She manages to growl without raising her voice an octave. “You make her suffer, just for a chipped hoof, and I will end you.” Their foreheads touch and Applebloom can finally see what lies beneath those violet eyes. ”Don’t you forget it.”

The yellow mare keeps her cool and tries to hide how much she’s scared by this attitude. Her hindlegs wobble, but her face is unmoving. She plays dumb.

“What are you talking about?”

“Don’t you dare. That pony is very important to me and seeing her this happy after so long because of you...If you dare take it away, you know what awaits you.” Spoon’s forelegs are still hard as tempered steel, but the terrific pressure starts to falter.

“Ah won’t. Ah love her.” Her sincerity makes Spoon’s hooves dangerously slip toward her neck. She decides to keep talking, regardless. “Ah love her so much and she will be happy.” The farmpony’s hooves touch the menacing grey ones on her neck, causing Silver’s hold to fade a little more.

“Why do you care so much?” Bloom asks, distancing further the grey mare’s menacing grasp.

Spoon simply stutters, utterly overwhelmed and unprepared. She had never used brute force before and now wasn’t the time to start. “Because she’s my best frie—”

“Cut yer crap. Ah know what you feel.”

Spoon’s resolve breaks and she slumps down on all fours.

“Ya love her too,” Bloom finally says with tears in her eyes. It has to be: there is nothing as beautiful and terrible as a first love. There is nothing that can drive a pony to such violent despair. Even if it’s her first love, Bloom knows.

“What do you mean?” Spoon blinks. “Is that all you think of? Just because two ponies are close they must be in love?” Her voice trembles in indignation, but the conviction in those words fades like snow in the Sun.

“Are ya willing to strangle me for her?” The struggle between the two slowly continues, each of the mares not daring to continue.

Spoon lowers her gaze, defeated, and her tears hit the floor. “Y-yes...” she mutters. “More than you can imagine, let alone comprehend.” The moment of weakness is once again hidden by venomous resolution. “That’s why.”

“And ya think I stole her from you, don’t ya?” The woeful sensation crawls inside of her, dispersing itself in dry tears and painful thoughts. She knew that mare more than Bloom ever did in those terrible instants, more than Bloom could possibly know in an entire lifetime...

“Not on purpose, of course. Nopony knows... Not even Tiara, but this doesn't change anything. Anything.” The grey mare finally lets Bloom go and walks away in silence into the hallway, leaving the farmpony shaken to her very core. When Silver Spoon finally disappears from her sight (without even attempting to say goodbye to Tiara), she becomes calm again, in sheer defiance of those words.

She is not scared of her.

Tiara’s smile is wide as ever and will stay that way.

They are happy.

Then why does that second and much louder thunder in the distance scares her so much?

Chapter 10: The Road I'm Taking

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter Ten: The Road I’m Taking

You’re a disgusting little thing, you know that? The figure wrapped in shadows had Tiara’s voice.

“I don’t know what you’re referring to...” The little filly rolls eyes and gives her back to the figure, sniding. A cold clutch grips her heart, though: she knows perfectly well what it’s talking about.

You did it again. Have you no shame? The voice changes, morphing into Silver Spoon’s calm and refined tone. The filly flinches, but she won’t let it show. Not to her.

“I didn’t use her. Not like before. I asked her if she wanted to stay, no?”

The voice snarls, tentacles of smoke rising from the ground. Do you think she would have left you, given the chance? She loves you and you don’t care!

“That was before!” the filly yells, facing the shadow’s glowing blue eyes, “It lasted for, like, a second! I love her, too! And I’m going to make her happy forever and never leave her and...”

Like Bloom said she would? The shadow chuckles, demolishing the filly, if only for a fleeting moment, into a trembling fit. But she’s stronger than this now. She always was and now, now of all moments, she has to show it.

“What do you know about me? What do you know about those times?” Her entire body shakes and aches, as she steels herself to hold back the tears. She’s done with tears. Spoon’s gentle smile comes to mind, along with the touch of her lips. They are all she needs to cleanse herself of the hateful words. “This is different because I want it! I can have everything I want!”

“You don’t even know what you want...” the veil of darkness dissolves and melts into the ground, revealing a pinkish mare with a sad smile and blue eyes. A silver tiara stands on her head, its gleam slowly fading and her mane disheveled. “We never knew.”

“I know what I don’t want.”

“And what is that?. Being alone?” Her mocking tone drips with venom.

“No.” The filly shakes her head, sadly looking at her hooves. She notices the floor made of wooden boards beneath her and with the corner of her eye sees a spotlight in the distance. Under it, there’s a little grey filly under a tree...

“I will not hurt Spoon. I don’t want to ever see her sad again, I don’t want this. I want to make her smile every day of her life. I want her to feel loved as I love her.”

“Then why? Why are you doing this to her again?”

The two lift their gaze towards the tree. The little grey filly seems smitten, almost ecstatic, treasuring her lips like a precious relic. The same lips that touched Tiara’s.

“This is the last I’m going to ask of Spoony. Even if I fail —even if she spits me in the face — I will at least make some good... At least for my Spoony.”

“What if she leaves us?” The mare leans closer to the filly and lowers herself to meet her gaze. A deep sadness and need its etched in those eyes, the mocking tone of her words dissolved to a sincere plead. “What if we can’t do enough for her? What if it happens again?”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t try, right?...I know this is my last chance with her.” The mare and the filly look together at the tree under the spotlight and exchange a brief nod. “I just hope I can make her happy until then. That’s it.”

“Because she’s wonderful, right?” The mare sniffles. “She always was.”

“Maybe she always was the right one. But, like she said, we were just young and stupid. Both of us.” She chuckles with a grim tone. “I’m so screwed up... I’m even talking with myself.”

“Well, I’d like to say you’re the only one that holds you in high regard, but I don’t think there’s somepony you hate more than yourself, right?”

“Nope.” The filly adds a grin of weary resignation. “But somepony loved me at least. Spoony still loves me. I guess it’s enough.”

“It has to be.”

“There were so few ponies that loved me and I lost them... All of them in just one blow.” A dreadful shadow looms behind the filly that vaguely resembles a storm. She doesn’t pay attention to it, even though a cold, relentless wind stars to blow.

“Once we’re done with this thing I’ll never let her go.”

Another mare appears under another spotlight. She sports a yellow coat and a red bow and looks at the two, sadly. They both take a step toward her, but she fades more and more from their view. Each step they take spills a drop of the insurmountable pit of darkness that forever separates them. “I need some answers. Whether I’ll like them or not.”

“You will suffer if you manage to see her. You know that, right?” The mare’s tearful smile slowly fades, turning into a pensive and nebulous look. Tiara’s doubts are all still there: the waves of peace that kiss her soul didn't manage to sweep away all of them. That will take time, of course.

“Of course we are. I can’t do anything decent for myself, but for her...” A smile lights up her face and heart, piercing with incredible force the veil of darkness enveloping Tiara’s world.

“It’s all worth it!” The beautiful, ecstatic mare screams her joy at the blue sky and the vibrant light of the sun. Her world is made of light, the light that shines and nurtures everypony, the same world that allowed Silver Spoon to live in it and for that she’s grateful. The sweet taste of her kisses and the light of her smile will be treasured forever.

She reminds herself of that day and that grey filly under a tree, who wanted to comfort somepony that didn’t deserve it... and ended up with feelings that two young and stupid ponies weren't ready for.

Everytime Tiara kissed Spoon, it was a recipe for disaster and hurting... but that is the past. She can’t change the past, but she can try to build a better future. As far as she’s concerned, their first kiss wasn’t under that tree or sparked by drunken stupor and loneliness. It was on that night they shared a bed of flowers.

For the first time, Diamond Tiara awakens in her best friend and lover’s tender grasp, and knows that everything will be alright. She brushes her lips against her beloveds and holds her in a tight and tender hug, the train’s movement gently rocking both of them as Tiara basks in Silver’s melodious heartbeat. A lighthearted giggle escapes her at the thought of that being her favourite sound in the world.Second only to her laugh, of course.

She misses her laugh more than anything in the world.

“What can I do to make you smile like before?” she whispers, caressing Spoon’s cheek and planting a small kiss on her neck.

“That is a good start.”

Tiara is still buried in the grey coat when she’s surprised by the gentle voice and soft giggle by the mare beneath her. Tiara’s eyes widen, as does as her smile, before her lips are locked, without warning, with Spoon’s. Not that the simple joys of life have to always be announced, obviously.

A warm giggle passes between their mouths as Diamond Tiara feels the thriving force of Spoon’s affections and repays her with simple caresses over her well built body. Her lover doesn’t waste any time and breaks the kiss while maintaining a firm grasp of Tiara’s whiters. A torrent of kisses falls on Spoon’s grey chest until it is interrupted by a mischievous grin and a question.

“Oh, Tiara...” Another small laugh makes the mare tremble with glee. “Aren’t you worried they might hear us?”

“I could buy the whole train if I wanted,” Tiara whispers, focusing her attention on Silver’s inviting tummy, slurping her tongue against the warm surface.

‘Let them watch if they want.”

For a moment, the loud snore of the pony from the nearby bunk almost startles her. Almost; he immediately falls back into slumber and Tiara reprises her obscene smooching with a small giggle.

“Come on, T...” Spoon grumbles, but somehow still appears eager. “What if somepony catches us?”

She stops hovering her wanting lips over Spoon’s own. “Well, that depends.”

“Depends on what?” The grey mare cocks an eyebrow curious.

“Well, if we find a sexy mare we could ask her to jo-—Ouch!” Her suggestion is slapped out of her mouth by a grey hoof, followed by a pouting bespectacled face. She can’t help but contain her wild chortle.

”S-sorry.” Her laughs stop dead the moment she sees Spoon’s frown last more than she expected.The fear of having screwed up again looms over her horizon, a horrible storm that hovers nearby...

...Until Spoon chuckles too, and the world becomes bright again.

“Oh, T!” Spoon strokes her cheek, keeping her voice low, “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“Of course not. I kind of deserved it, really.” Tiara chuckles. “Did you sleep well?”

“He snored,” she says as dryly as possible, pointing a hoof toward the same possible peeper from before, still in the land of dreams. “Loudly. And he’ll continue to.”

“I suppose you wouldn’t find comfort in knowing I slept like a little filly.” Thanks to you. Always thanks to you, Tiara thinks. A part of her still feels some guilt over every form of comfort she gains from that wonderful mare beside her. But love is supposed to make ponies feel like that.

Just like she feels with Bloom.

“At least one of us did.” She beams at the magenta mare. She lifts herself on her haunches, rubbing a tired eye, and carefully moves the window’s curtain. “Are we there yet?”

The wooden landscape rattles past her window: the train’s vibrations making their way into the inside the cabin.

“We should be there in a minute. Manehattan...”

Tiara gives a longing look to the world reflected through the window, repeating each syllable of the city as if to say to herself that what she’s doing is real.

“Are you sure she is there, T?” Spoon strokes Diamond’s shoulder and coats it with silent kisses.

“I hope so, or Girl-Featherweight is going to get it when we get back home.” Tiara smiles, but her mouth emits no joy. All the pointless menaces and smug attitudes are starting to feel useless and demeaning, an act that she needs but she doesn’t cherish anymore.

Like a chore.

Spoon cocks an eyebrow. “What did she say, exactly?”

“She heard of Bloom in the Big Apple and went there to see if it was true. Bloom told her that she wanted to see me. That’s it.” She wishes the orange pegasus had given her more information about it, but there was something in her eyes... a remnant from the past that keeps tormenting her. She’s lucky she told her this much.

“And you want to see her again?” Spoon’s warm breath on her back turns colder, almost like she’s afraid.

“Closure, Spoony. Closure. I don’t want my last memory of her to be me spitting at her in the face.”

“She said that horrible thing about your dad... didn’t she?”

Spoon’s words bring back the awful truth. The mouth she had kissed so many times and had whispered countless words that nopony ever said or meant, the same mouth that had made her a real mare... had spoken unforgivable things. In the end, there was still some love in her heart for Applebloom and for that, and only for that, she still can’t believe it was real. That love gave her a second chance that she hopes to not regret.

“Yeah, but...I want to know why.” She throws away the cheap blanket and gets off the bed to grab a tiny luggage with the teeth, dragging it closer to the two.

“I want to know if after all we had, all we shared, if this is really the end. I want to know if she lied to me all that time.” She takes another look outside and gazes again at the approaching city. “If she truly loved me, she wouldn’t have meant those words.”

“You know...” Spoon pulls the other mare to her chest in that alluring way that Diamond knows and loves... and knows that something hard to say is going to come out of those lips.

“I still don’t know all the details about you two and, frankly, I respect your decision, but what happens next? After you have those answers?” The grey mare strokes Tiara’s cheek with a hoof and plants a soft kiss on her muzzle.

“I guess we go home and live happily ever after, like in those fairy tales.” Tiara throws herself at her best friend, her lover, her world, wrapping around her in a bone crushing hug. “We forget about country hicks, unhappiness, and heartaches and focus on living for once. You and I: sappy as we can be!” She touches Spoon’s forehead with her own, tender smile facing tender smile. “If you want it, of cour—”

“I do!” she cuts her off with the speed of light.

“I mean, if you have any second th-”

“Nope! Not a single one!” Spoon’s smile grows wider and wider by the minute.

Tiara’s heart pumps and joy fills her being.

“I love you so much.” She lets out a frustrated sigh, “I wish I could say something different, something cute. I don’t mean it as a cliche, but I feel every word. I love you.”

“I love you too, Tiara. I don’t need more.” Their lips brush against each other for a brief moment, “If you mean it, it’s the best thing you could say to me.”

“You’re amazing, you know it? Never change, Spoony. “

“I won’t.”

Their kiss feels like a dream, the caress of a benevolent being that assures them that everything will be alright. Tiara remembers her first night with Spoon and her desperate prayer to Princess Luna. I want to make this work, she had pleaded, and for once in her life a voice answered back, granting her more than she had ever dared to hope. She never was the Goddess fearing type, but she owed Luna something after all...and even more to Spoony.

Feel loved again.It’s the only thing she ever wanted and it’s there, right in her hooves and she won’t screw up this time. She can’t, or she’ll lose the best thing that’s ever happened to her. So much meaning in her and only one pony...The first thing she’s going to do upon their return to Ponyville is ask her to come live with her. She’s a grown mare now and the house feels so empty...

The steam of the train rises like a fog and obscures the two mares standing on the platform. All around them, a horde of passengers swarms over all over the station, shouting requests, waving hellos and goodbyes, picking up luggage, setting down luggage, running, and walking.

A shrill voice rises above the swarm making their way on and off the train, shouting vile expletives while mercifully cut off by everypony bumping into her. Silver Spoon looks around, embarrassed, keeping close to Tiara, but not enough to make somepony think she’s with that pony with the bad temper.

“Come on! Move you bunch of-Ouch!” Tiara’s muzzle bumps into something for the umpteenth time. She tries to turn and search for her companion, but to no avail. “Spoony, come on: follow me! I think I got-ouch!”

“Couldn’t you have waited for everypony to get out?” Spoon’s voice comes from the rump of an incredibly muscular stallion.

“Maybe they could’ve waited for a lady to step down!” She adjusts the dark shades on her nose, further muddling her view.

“And whats with the glasses?” The grey mare manages to wiggle herself out of the crowd and appears beside Tiara.

“I won’t risk the chance of somepony recognizing me here.”

“Actually, you told me you came here just a couple of times,” Spoon mumbles rolling her eyes, eliciting a confused glare from her fillyfriend. At least she guesses that is how she should be called now. It hasn’t exactly been established, but... some things about relationships should be obvious, some words should not be pressed upon.

If they manage to get out from that pile of smelly and uncouth travelers, they’re gonna have some time to clarify it.

“Wasn’t somepony supposed to meet us at the station? An address at least?” Spoon continues, so close to the magenta mare that her flank brushes against hers.

“Well, yeah. There should be somepony here, but she didn’t...tell...me...” Her mind stops and her mouth goes dry. The crowd disperses itself like fog while the voice of Silver Spoon sounds distant and irrelevant. Something appears in the distance: a flash of red that glistens in the wind, a firm figure that looks pretty, even with a certain build and stands tall among the rubble.

The colour of that coat, even if darkened by her shades, immediately makes her heart skip several heartbeats. The figure starts to turn, and Tiara is not ready, not ready at all— never was.

Her legs turn to jelly and wobble, and her mouth goes so dry it burns.

Every plan she has, every word she wishes to say is gone, gone, gone, burned by the mere sight of a lost love. Cold sweat dirties her elegant coat and every breath crushes her like having a boulder on top of her lungs.

Thankfully, Spoon is there for her, always she needs it the most. A loving foreleg circles her shoulder, stopping her from shaking, like a lifeboat in the sea of her soul, tainted after so much pain. A storm ravages those once calm waters, the same storm that she knows and fears from the day she met her...and the day she broke her heart.

She steels herself with the same knowledge that helped her change and accept the present: The past is dead. A new mare is facing this and this new mare is here to make sure that nothing hurts her again. She gently slips away from Spoon’s tender hold, with great difficult, and removes her shades with theatrical aplomb to meet her destiny.

“Hello, Bloom,” she says, waving her silken mane around, “long time no see.”

“Well, close enough I guess...” says a voice, quite embarrassed.

Tiara’s pupils widen and her cool goes tumbling off into the distance. In front of her eyes is a completely different, but still remarkably similar mare. Somepony with her own kind of beauty, but still possessing the familiar family traits. A long silken red mane adorns her round face, matched by a much darker shade of orange than she saw before, not that the glasses helped to make the distinction...

Maybe Spoon was right, after all. Her cutie mark should have been a clue: three dark seeds in a circle with the smaller tips pointed toward each other’s.

The mare gives an awkward smile and takes a quick glance at Tiara’s flank, “Well, I guess you are...”

“Oh my gosh, you’re Babs...Something!” Tiara returns the smile with all the sincerity of a politician.

“...Diamond Tiara,” Babs Seed finishes, unfazed.

“Oh, my gosh. haven’t seen you in like, forever!” Spoon says excited, before giving a subtle wink with a hint of disgust that says: since you threw us in the mud. Tiara flashes a sly smile in response.

“Yeah, true.” Babs adds a weak chuckle, “Just look at us! It seems only yesterday we were little fillies...”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t yesterday, more like ten years or so. Anyway, where’s Bloom?” Tiara shatters every semblance of composure with the only question that she wants answered in the world.

“Well, you get to the point quickly.” The two mares exchange an embittered glare. “I still don’t know why Coz wanted to see you so badly.”

“Pray that you never know. But I think your Coz gave you the short version.”

“She told me enough.” Babs goes toward the street and whistles for a nearby cab, “She told me you’re the reason she came here.”

“Oh, don’t you start judging me, too,” says Tiara with massive, undiluted weariness. She wasn’t expecting anything else, but...It still hurts. It still hurts that Bloom thinks that.

“What did she tell you exactly?” Her voice trembles as Spoon offers her hoof to help get on the carriage.

“She wrote me a letter saying she needed some time away from home and then, a few days later, she’s at my doorstep and breaks down crying. Her heart had broke into tiny little pieces.”

The carriage shudders with their weight as the trio take a seat.

“And all because of you. So forgive If I’m not exactly welcoming toward you.” She gives a little tap on the inner wall of the carriage and says, “132 Hoffington Street, please.” The carriage starts moving at once.

“You know nothing about me.” Tiara leans against the seat, keeping herself as close to Spoon as possible, hoping for a protective gesture or comfort.

“But I know Applebloom enough.” Babs leans forward, staring right into Tiara’s icy blue eyes.

I knew it!

The hateful mask that is so characteristic of her returns. Yet, somehow, the pang of regret obscures what should be joy in her soul. She misses her as she misses Bloom.

Of course. It must be like that.

Maybe the two mares will find some closure with her arrival... It could be worse, after all. At least she has to try to stop Bloom’s suffering.

I’m here now. No turning back.

“So what have you been up to, you two? Life in the big city and all that?” Tiara sighs in relief; Spoon did them both a favor and broke the incredibly awkward atmosphere.

“I work as a teacher, actually. You know, shaping the minds of young foals and fillies, helping them find their way—”

“Really?” Tiara chortles, “still in the Crusading business?”

“Technically, yes. I never saw it that way, but the concept is the same. Got some problem with that?”

“It’s just that from your Cutie Mark looked like you were into, I don’t know, seeds or something. Maybe even dung, plantation and all...”

“Do you have some kind of medical condition that compels you to be a b—”

A wheel of the cab hits a small rock lying on the road, making the whole carriage tremble, and the word is lost among the sounds of rustling wood. An awkward, painful silence follows with a vengeance, further proving that maybe Tiara’s venomous tongue has a will of its own. There is some comfort, of course, in Silver Spoon’s timid giggling, which she gingerly covers with a hoof.

Someday, somehow, things will go back to normal, with that pony by her side and making her feel worthy again.

Even if it means putting up with stupid jokes like that.

“What a crappy day...”

She hears a figure trudging along the darkened hallway, before reaching the door to her cousin’s flat. She removes the very uncomfortable horseshoes, throwing them onto the floor and searches with a hoof for the light switch.

All the while, she tries avoiding the piles of discarded clothes on the floor and, suddenly, as soon as the artificial light hits both mares in the eyes, Diamond Tiara finally sees her.

She doesn’t know what to call her, what she deserves to call her.

“Hi, Bloom.” Tiara says calmly and with a timid smile, sitting on the couch.

“Celestia Almighty!” Bloom almost faints, utterly intimated by the serene expression of the mare she loved. “Ah-Ah...What are ya doing here?”

“Well, you wanted to see me, right?”

Please don’t do this to me again, please.

“Y-Yes! Ah mean...how did you ya...?”

“The pegasus, um, what’s her name...”

“Scootaloo!” she yells like the mare in question is right there in the room.

“And your cousin, too. They told me you wanted to see me.”

“But...Yeah, it’s true. It’s just ah didn’t expect for you to really come. Ah though ya never wanted to see me again.”

“I’m here, instead. Surprise.” Tiara fakes a smile that dies out like a flower in the snow. She lifts herself from the couch, every fiber of her being screaming at her to hug the mare who has broken her heart...and fighting with herself to avoid it. “I wanted to see you.”

“Why, Tiara?” Bloom takes a deep breath and finally closes the distance to the other pony.

“That’s a question I need to ask you. Why did you do it?”

The moment of the truth arrives with the strength of a sledgehammer to the stomach. She has formulated the question so many times, but she hasn’t got the time nor the need of subtlety.

“Why?” she repeats, and will repeat it as may times as possible.

Time itself stops and only those two and their pasts exist, missing only one piece.

The thunderstorm gathers again around them, like the day she said goodbye to her father, and both of them know that day won’t end until the light of the truth shines upon them.

“If you ever loved me, tell me why,” Tiara blurts out, almost tearing herself apart for the sheer strain of holding back all the tears she stored for this moment.

“Ah thought ya already knew.Because it’s all mah fault.”

Chapter Twelve: Me and her, face to face at last...

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 12: Me and her, face to face at last...

“Are you sure about this, Tiara?” Spoon asks, finishing the sentence with a small kiss at the tip of her nose.

“I have to do this alone. She may feel threatened if anypony else is there. I don’t want that.”

“And leave you alone with her? I don’t think so,” the red maned mare intervenes. “Besides, you may just make things worse, coming out of nowhere like that.”

“Well, it was your cousin that wanted to see her.” Spoon steps in with an angry stomp of hoof. “Unless you two are so stupid to—”

“Please, girls!” Tiara yelps, quelling the fires of rage and humbly facing the cousin of the one she loved. “Please, Babs. I promise I won’t hurt her or anything else.”

“But why the act? The empty, dark room, you stalking her in silence like some kind of horror monster, which could be appropriate considering that you—”

“Trust me. She knows. She knows of this stupid act and I guess...I just miss it.”

“Do what you have to do.” The orange mare simply says, even putting a hoof on Tiara’s shoulder. A small gesture of thrust is enough at this point. Spoon’s gentle smile is just icing on the cake.

She is ready. For what, she isn’t sure about it...

“So, um, how are ya holding up?” Appebloom’s eyes search for an exit, as they don’t want to meet hers. Tiara knows this, but it makes it just worse. She had wanted Tiara to be there, she knew she would be there. Earning some closure just became more difficult than before.

“I lost my daddy and my fillyfriend in the very same day,” she states bluntly. “You?” Her sharp eyes tells her that for the yellow mare, that statement was like a punch in the gut, but she doesn’t feel guilty about it. In her mind, she finds herself entitled to a few cheap shots.

“Gee, you don’t lose any time.”

“I’ve wasted enough of it. I just wanted some answers, not chit chatting like we’re old friends.”

“Ah guess ah asked the wrong question.” She brushes the floor with a hoof.

“To put it mildly. You didn’t even answer mine. But you know what? Let’s do these things properly: how are you holding up? What are you doing in the Big Apple?”

“Mooching off mah favourite cousin that is too kind an’ working as a waitress in some washed up diner because ah couldn’t dare to face ya again.” Bloom speaks with all the dryness of a dried up lake.

“Really?” She almost laughs in Applebloom’s face, but that last bit moves her not to. The filly has grown older, and want answers to mend the wounds of her heart—not laugh at the expense of the pony she once loved. “You couldn’t find anything better?”

“Ya know, they say life in Manehattan is so fancy and ya can have everything ya want, but sometimes ya have to start from ta bottom.”

“It’s probably the accent. Somepony could think it’s cute and somepony, um, doesn’t.”

“Yeah, ah thought so too.”

The mares fidgets on their hooves, exchanging a look of mutual agreement that the cheap talk is finally over.

“But ah guess ah wasn’t aiming too high.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Tiara says coldly, her words coming out like sharp icicles.

“Ah thought ah did. Because it was all my fault. B'sides, ah think ya could ask me why about so many things.” Bloom almost chokes a sob out, as if the solemnity of her dramatic reveal and her fault was exhausted on that first attempt.

“Then, I’m gonna be more specific: why did you said that thing at my daddy’s—” The word funeral slithers and strikes her heart like a snake, forcing its awful maw around it. She isn’t a little, dumb filly with no concept of death, she has grown accustomed to live without her father’s smile...but nopony says she should come to like it. “After he saw me that way... How could you?!” She slams the table aside, reprimanding herself to not do it again, lest she have to buy a new one for the Bad Seed, who is waiting just outside the door.

“Ah wanted-Ah wanted for you to hate me,” Bloom spits out, “ah don’t know why ah was so mean, but ah wanted for ya to never see me again. Ah knew that striking ya right there, using just those words, would do the trick. Ah knew that ya would jus’ hate me again and finish the story. Ah had to hurt ya one last time.”

Tiara listens in collected silence. You succeeded. You hurt me more than anypony else. You made me hate the pony I loved...and I’m not sure you’re that pony anymore.

“Ah knew it came out of nowhere, but seeing ya like that, ruining your life jus’ because ya wanted to be with me...” She takes another sip of water on which she almost chokes on, “It’s so messed up and ah thought that only by getting rid of me ya could get a second chance.”

“There are no second chances when you love somepony the way I loved you. There can’t be. You have to live with what you get and I couldn’t have asked for more.” She reaches for Bloom’s cheek again, daring not to caress it. Why does she want this so much? “I never blamed you for that.”

“But ah blamed me. How can ya be with somepony else, if you don’t love you’self ta begin with?”

“I could give you some lessons about that.” Tiara lets out a bitter chuckle. “I’ve hated myself on so many occasions—maybe I did so all my life.” Her eyes wander elsewhere, lost in the labyrinth of memories. “Maybe, the ponies that love me mean so much to me... because I just can’t do the same: love Diamond Tiara.”

One memory, a treasured memory, surfaces again when she finds herself in the farmpony’s warm embrace that seemed so long gone.

“Why, then?” Her facade of collected disdain cracks, allowing for Tiara to reach for her former lover and stroke her cheek. Normally, she would ask herself why she can’t let go, why that mare that wanted to help buck trees with her fillyfriend is still there, somewhere, and just wants a place beside Applebloom. She doesn’t care at the moment. “Why this change of pace? Do you still want me to hate you?”

Touched by the gesture, Bloom almost touches Tiara’s hoof with her own, but doesn’t dare to do so, forcing her gaze on the floor as a desperate measure to add some more distance between them.

“No. No, ah don’t want it anymor’. Ah know ya can’t jus’ say you’re sorry and everything will be a’right, but ah want ya to know that...” she stops, biting her lip and keeps staring at the floor, like she’s begging for an answer to be magically written there. Tiara nods for her to continue. “Ah want ya to know that ah still care about ya and that ah’m so sorry. Ah couldn’t look in your eyes anymore after that day.”

Just care about me? That’s it?

“And you still can’t look at me, can you?” Her hoof slides under Bloom’s chin and she forces the other mare to face her, locking their gazes. Applebloom’s eyes try to roll out of the way of Tiara’s piercing blue orbs, but to no avail.

“Yeah.” Bloom lets out a sad and forced chuckle. “Ah know it was horrible and monstrous and...and...”

“Unforgivable?” A dark shadow envelopes that word, as if it was suggested by some dark force that is watching their turmoil with glee.

“Ah missed your fancy words so much. After what happened ah didn’t deserve ya anymore and—”

“Deserve me?!” Tiara snaps out, ending the gentle contact and the possibly prepared speech, “You thought you had to deserve me?”

“Ah meant still staying with ya, loving ya...Ah couldn’t do that anymore. Ah wasn’t worthy of your love anymor’. Not after your dad—”

“You think I’m some kind of prize, a possession for the most worthy? What’s next? You and SIlver Spoon are going to compete over me now?” Indignation and rage are quelled by ferocious embarrassment, as at the first sign of change of Bloom’s expression, she covers her mouth with her hooves, but it’s too late. The other mare has already come into the discussion.

“S-Silver Spoon?” Bloom recoils back in surprise. “What is she-Why are you bringing her up?”

“Because we’re a couple!” she shouts, giving no time for her brain to object the truth escaping from her heart and stabbing with a shiv her rationality along the way.

The silence is the worst part. That awful silence that follows everytime she says something that turns everything upside down. It allows the sound of many thoughts, awful thoughts to make their way into her skull with no hope but for words, any kind of words, to silence them for a minute.

“Uh.” Bloom huffs and holds the bridge of her hoof. The yellow mare, very calmly, reaches for a glass of water and gulps it down in a blink, her gesture automatic and impossible to decipher.
“So, you’ve already replaced me.”

“No, I haven’t! I-I couldn’t do that. I—”

“Don’t lie to me. Ah’m not dumb and you’re not either. Ya did jus’ that.”

“Yes. Yes, I did. I replaced you with my best friend.” Tiara rubs her temple and sighs, her nerves cracking like glass. She has avoided so many truths until now, and this is just the latest and probably most painful. “I don’t know if it’s cute or just horrible.”

“Are you happy with her?” Her inquisitive look goes under Tiara’s skin. She wonders with fear and guilt why is she asking this? Jealousy, perhaps? No...The mare she loved was never this petty...

“Yes, I am. We had a somewhat rocky start, but we’re working things out.” Bloom flashes that look, a look of foalish amazement and goofy confusion that Tiara always finds funny. Contrived and inappropriate, but still something that reminds her of a happier time.

“Don’t give me that look.”

“Sorry. Ah always thought that if there was somepony ya alwalys got along with, she was the one. Ah never thought ya’ll could have a rocky start.”

“It’s mostly my fault. All my fault.” Echoes of the past live again and she remembers the soft whispers and sweet comforts. Ya can tell me anything. She has no need to lie, no fear to lose her...because it already happened. “I guess it was almost too convenient that my best friend held those feelings when I needed somepony with me.”

“But it turned out well, right?”

“For your definition of ‘well,’ it’s certainly something. She said that—” the shadow of that tree and two fillies exchanging their first kiss is still there, taunting her. “She said that she loved me since we were little fillies together. As much a young and stupid filly could have known about love, anyway. And I’m talking about myself, too.”

“Ah already knew that.”

“Oh, please! Don’t start with the dumb jokes. I know we were really close and all, but when you have just one friend, one very good friend, that doesn’t mean two ponies are—” Tiara paces up and down the room, waving a hoof and ranting non-stop.

“Spoon told me about it.” Bloom sighs with a defeated look.

“What are you talking about?” She almost trips due to her hooves suddenly stopping, while cocking an eyebrow.

“The day we invited her, to say the ‘big news’ to her. She told me everything, how she feels for ya.”

“Oh, Spoony...” Everything comes together now. If the love Spoon has for this spoiled and careless mare, grown under that tree and finally blossomed when the two were grown, it must have felt like torture for Silver Spoon, hearing from the mare of her dreams that her heart belongs to another. Part of her says she shouldn’t be blaming herself. Nopony knew...

She’ll do it anyway, because even if it is just the past, the thought of her wonderful fillyfriend suffering breaks her heart in two. “She didn’t take it well, I suppose?”

“She said that she would have killed me if ah made ya suffer.”

A cold, hail-storm of silence falls the room.

“Well, you should be grateful that she is outside then.” Tiara chuckles nervously to break the tension, but realizes it’s futile. The other mare mare just scowls and shakes her head, the joke dying a silent death. “You know, I’m here just to see you again, but about you? Why did you want to see me after all this time? Why are you still asking for me? Why...?” A dawning realizations is seen in Applebloom’s timid smile and mortified look. “You still hoped that you and I—”

“Yes!” Then it comes: a smile so sincere, gingerly crossed by a streaming of tender tears, that it physically hurts. She holds a hoof to her chest, fearing her heart to stop and burst from some unknown emotion. Joy? Anger? Confusion?

Confusion comes out as the winner.

“I-I don’t know what to say...”

“Of course ya can’t. Jus’ forget about it.” Bloom hides her face with a hoof, rustling her mane frantically, dripping with uneasy feelings. “Ah can’t believe ah even asked ya.”

“You know, Bloom...” The yellow mare’s embarrassment turns into a gleam o f hope. “I don’t know if we could have had a chance. I don’t know if I could have had a chance, even after what happened with Dad. Not after y-you can’t drop a bomb like that on me!”

That face...disgust. I could only see disgust in his eyes and it’s her fault. All her fault. Why? Why do I still feel something for you if you...No, I can’t blame her. I really can’t. I still can’t. Never could.

But it’s her fault I lost him!

Why am I still reaching for her, then?

She continues, spurred by the same, old faked indignation and anger, dancing around the issue like a cheap carillon. “I thought it was over. I said this to myself over and over and over again. There was no hope...No reason to ever be together, and giving me hope like that—”

“Ah’m sorry,” the farmpony blurts out in tears, throwing herself at Tiara’s hooves, “Ah’m sorry if ah ruined your life. Ah’m sorry If ah left you all alone in the cold when ya still needed me. Ah’m sorry for being so selfish and...and dumb!”

This time it’s Diamond Tiara who initiates the hug, grabbing in her forelegs a pony that is begging for her forgiveness. She sees herself reflected in those tears, alone in the cold and abandoned by the pony she loved. The old Tiara would have repaid the favor with an evil smirk and a mean joke, but the old Tiara never knew how to love.

“I forgive you,” she whispers still grasping the mare. It isn’t difficult, really, forgiving her. She feels peaceful, instead, as if a great weight has finally been lifted.

“I forgive you, Bloom.”

Tears cross her smile, taking away the hate and malaise, never to return, “I really mean it. I loved you and for this I forgive you. Me of all ponies should know what means being mean when you have no other choice.”

“Y-ya mean it?”

“Yes. Yes, I do. You still hurt me and it will still hurt, but I forgive you.” She touches Bloom’s forehead with her own, “But I can’t. This time we can’t. Because if something happens again, nopony can be sure if you’ll stay by my side this time.”

“And SIlver Spoon will?”

“Yes,” she lashes out before doubt, any kind of doubt, sets in to ruin everything; her conviction is built upon solid ground. “Yes, she would. She would do anything for me. I hurt her, Bloom. I hurt her even though she loved me and wanted me to love her in return. “

“And you’re hurting me, right now.”

“You started it, beautiful. But Spoon...she waited for me, in the shadow. But just like you, she always saw something more in me. Something worthy of being loved. Something that was worth waiting for and I guess I knew it was there too. Even before you saw it, an-and it happened.”

“And what about me?” Bloom’s voice goes up a few octaves, turning into a shriek that is short of knocking off the magenta mare from her hooves. “You said that ya loved me. Ya made all those plans about our future together. Ya made me feel so proud of being with ya—”

“It’s true. I was, and if nothing had happened I still would be, even now. Forgiveness is one thing and I mean it, truly, but this... It’s not-It’s not fair! It’s not fair to me. I can’t act like nothing happened and trot back at your side!”

“It’s still all about ya, isn’t it? You shout I need you and expect that everypony will comply. Ya’re the one that can feel miserable an’ make everypony else miserable as well, jus’ because ya feel lonely. Ya’re the only one that can cling to somepony else because ya know that will be the only pony that will love her. Have ya ever thought that I could feel the same without ya?”

In that moment, Diamond Tiara knows that she isn’t the only one who wears a mask of composure and foalish indignation. Sadly, Bloom’s own isn’t strong as hers, cracking that facade and revealing a face of tears and regret— all the tears she has stored until now, other tears that are on her conscience. “Ya’re the only one that can make mistakes...” Applebloom whispers, before slumping down on the floor, her forehead touching the cold ground. Pure terror clutches her very soul as the past once thought dead returns to haunt her again and again and again.

“No, please. Don’t give me that. Don’t do that. I beg you—”

“Ah’m the one begging you, now: Please, take me back with ya. Please, ah love you.”

“You stupid-”, with feline grace she picks up the broken mare from the floor and cups her cheek with brutal tenderness, staring violently in her orange orbs. A pair of terrified, blood shot eyes stare back at her. “Where were you when I asked the same?”

Their lips meet with burning need, leaving Applebloom to whimper in their kiss. A whimper that lasts just a mere second before her forelegs fall down to Tiara’s waist. Their lips part again, just to let out a pained whisper from the spoiled mare: “I wish I could give you up.”

She kisses Bloom again before burying her muzzle in that yellow neck, nibbling at it with tender care.

“Please hold me,” she sobs. She’s never felt so defeated like in this moment, at the mercy of the mysterious force that guides her heart.

Applebloom complains, making those gentle, silent nights that saw two mares cuddling together be real again. “Ah’m sorry for your dad. Ah truly am.”

“You should. He trusted you. He liked you.”

“Ah jus’ wanted to tell the truth. Ah jus’ wanted to look in his eyes and say the truth.”

“Now you can’t do that anymore.” Even if she’s indoors, a trickle of raindrops splatter down her cheeks. They’re warm, though. ”But he would have appreciated the truth.”

“Ah know it’s too late. Ah know I don’t deserve this chance, but-—”

Another kiss follows, desperate, wanting and yet tender for the effort Tiara puts in it. Nothing exists apart from the kiss, nothing except those happier days. Nothing except for forgiveness that blesses them both.

“Come back with me. Come back home. Stop hating yourself.”

“Are ya sure?”

“Running away is useless. Take back your life and try to be happy. If you won’t do it for me, at least do it for your family. Be happy that you have one.” She doesn’t know why this slipped out of her mouth, but it doesn’t matter. Never did.

“Tiara, I’m sor—” but she does not finish, her words are once again stopped by Tiara lips, swallowing doubt and regret with a simple gesture of kindness and affection.

“Stop being sorry.” She roughly pushes Bloom on the floor and locks lips with her once again, the world around her fading, melting away in her strong grip and the familiar taste of those lips she lost and found again.

A smile and a pair of purple eyes flares behind her eyelids. A smile that trusts her and owes the world for it.

Spoony...Celestia, what the hay am I doing?! A voice in her head screams, terrified, as their kiss breaks. Everything she feared and loathed about herself comes true in the simple act of a kiss. Was it that easy to forget about Silver Spoon? Or was it just because she hoped for this? Waiting and waiting, loathing and complaining, burying her worries in her best friend’s embrace, in her SIlver Princess’ love, only until the glorious day Applebloom would return-—

No.

No, it can’t be.

She isn’t just a replacement...A toy to discard once I’m done with it. It cannot be...Why am I doing this? Why am I doing this to her? Again?! Her gaze goes blank as Bloom’s caress goes unnoticed.

“Tiara, what’s wrong?” she says softly.

“Everything is wrong!” She tightens her forelegs around Bloom’s waist, “I am wrong. I-I have Silver Spoon, now. Why am I doing this to her?” she sobs and groans. “I really wish we could get together, erase that day, erase all the pain and loneliness, start again just with me and you, but I found somepony else!”

Again the awful silence, interrupted by the oh-so-close sound of Bloom’s heartbeat. She can’t help but feels that it’s just as soothing as Spoony’s. Every beat is a reminder than the mares she loves are real and are there.

“Ah know.”

“I can’t choose. I don’t want to choose.”

“Nopony is asking ya to choose. Not even mahself.” Bloom strokes her mane, the kindness of it making it all the more difficult.

“I can’t choose. Not between you two. But I’ll have to.” She stares wide eyed at nothing, still pressed against Bloom’s warm coat. “I’ll have to.”

“Ah’m sorry. Ah’m so sor—”

She shoves a hoof in front of Bloom’s mouth. “Stop saying you’re sorry. It won’t help.”

“Just hold me, please. Hold me like you used to do. I need to rest. To rest...” The embrace grows stronger and Tiara drifts for just a second, a minute of peace in her embrace. It won’t last, of course. It’ll never be enough: not even with all the time in the world could she make such a decision.

Could it ever be possible...?

Maybe there is no need of a choice. Maybe even those two, for Tiara’s sake...could they get along? Why should love be reduced, limited to just few set choices, not unlike the flip of a coin? Nopony would know and should know, just the three of them...sappy as they can be. The possibility was never considered until she saw Bloom again, until she heard the other side of the story. Why does she have to let a simple mistake ruin the happiness of three ponies?

A mistake made only to let this happen: to make Diamond Tiara happy.

You can have anything you want.

Those words turn in a litany of torment: in her heart she knows she deserves to be happy, she has the right to fight with hooves and teeth to gain it, but at what cost? Her father...?

That she keeps disappointing, even long after he’s gone, is because of the whims of her heart.

To be three again, to let pain the and heartbreaks out of their lives, to settle their differences in the name of the purest desire can’t be so bad...Maybe if it hadn’t been so sudden he could have understood, maybe he could have left the past behind...

Maybe.

The possibilities are endless. Endless fates and endless Tiaras, sharing the same ocean but landing on different beaches. What matters is the road ahead of her. What matters now is to rest, even for a minute.

Sweet, brief slumber envelopes her, like a blanket full of stars. She can almost see it and hears a soothing voice in her ear, telling her not to be afraid, blessing her with a second of dreamless sleep. She can swear she sees the flash of a perfect crescent moon, like the one she saw that incredible, but still imperfect, first night with Spoony. The same stars she saw the first night with Bloom.

After so long, Diamond Tiara prays again to the Moon Goddess, hoping for an answer. Any answer.

The drape of stars and quiet is shred once Spoon barges in. The grey mare kicks the door almost out of its hinges and looks at the couple with enraged eyes full of tears.

“You!” Tiara jumps out of the embrace, startled.

“Spoony! I can explain: I wasn’t—”

But before she can finish the sentence, before she can notice the cruel irony of the same situation returning to torment her, she’s the grey mare rudely shoves her out of the way.

Once the center of her world, now SIlver Spoon's eyes are fixated with a sickened gleam against Applebloom: “You’re doing this again,” she whispers, not unlike a vengeful demon.

“What? Ah wasn’t—” before her words hit the air, the grey mare lunges towards Bloom, gripping her neck with her hooves.

“YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME!” Spoon screams, her composure, her sweet, collected demeanour disappearing under a mask of tears and fury worthy of a berserker, her hooves pressing against the farmpony’s throat, drowning the sound of her gurgle with Silver’s enraged sobs.

“Stop! For the love of Celestia, stop!” Tiara jumps into the fray, struggling with all of her scarce strength to separate the two, trying to avoid something terrible to happen to either of them. She circles Spoon’s chest with her forelegs, trying to drag her away or at least slow her down. “I don’t want to lose either of you! Please!” she screams, crying out her very soul.

SIlver Spoon stops, loosening her grip around Bloom’s neck, her forelegs slowly descending to the sides while the yellow mare breathes freely again. Before she can draw a sigh of relief, before she can see the faintest glimmer of hope, it happens. A grey flash hits her right across the muzzle, making Tiara tumble and fall on the floor, her face hurting like a thousand needles.

Spoon’s still lifted hoof and horrified look completes the awful picture. Bloom holds her neck, gasping for air. Diamond Tiara tries to not cry, not for the physical pain, but for the full weight of what just happened falling on her shoulders. She doesn’t blame Spoon, or Applebloom or everything or anypony else for that matter. She doesn’t know if she should blame herself. But when she sees SIlver Spoon cry, she would want to see everything that sprang those tears burn. Including herself if necessary.

“Tiara, I’m-I’m sorry!” Silver Spoon runs away, leaving a stream of tears in her wake. Tiara lifts herself, ignoring the pain, any kind of pain and exchanges one last, tearful look with Bloom, who just nods, seeing in her heart for one last time. There is no anger, no hate in those eyes, because the time for those is passed.

Tiara runs away, in the hope of following her best friend. In the hope of saving her from this madness.

She runs faster than she can perceive, ignoring an orange blur that yells at her and already seems far away. The stair leading out the apartment does not exist, turning in just a descending spiral that swirls and turns toward the ground.

She runs outside in the street, amidst a sea of faces and voices that turn into a surreal painting, her mind not working to put everything into place, to make the world coherent, but only to find one mare, the only one she wants to see.

She starts to run again, not caring for the aching in her flank, not caring for every pony she bumps into or the things she runs over, nor the sound of broken glasses or angry words, searching only for the grey of her coat. A cold wind blows, but it doesn’t matter because she doesn’t feel it. A thunder booms in the distance, but it doesn’t matter because she can’t hear it. The dreadful storm from her past looms over her world, but this spoiled, little filly...

No.

This young mare is not afraid of it anymore. That’s how she finally sees herself.

All the world stops and her eyes paint the first clear picture, the only one that matters: Silver Spoon...frozen in a crying fit in the middle of a road. She reaches for her with a smile that simply says hope and SIlver Spoon smiles back at her beneath the tears, happy of having been found, her relief so powerful that she can taste it...until a creaking, bumping noise emerges from the darkness of the Manehattan night. Silver Spoon turns and cowers in fear before it, causing Tiara to look as well with worried eyes.

A speeding carriage spirals around the corner streetlamp, uncaring for everything but its driver’s need for speed, his eyes reflecting drunken stupor, caring even less for a solitary and confused mare with only precious seconds left to live.

Tiara grinds her teeth of impotent rage while her hindqurters still ache and burn. Spoon is reduced to just shaking in fear and closes just one eye, sending a silent plea to Tiara while a single tear just rolls down her cheek. A tear that feels like the last she’ll ever shed.

A plea immediately answered because Diamond Tiara won’t let this happen to anypony she loves. Not anymore.

Her legs move of their own will to push her Spoony out the way with the few seconds remaining her, sending Silver Spoon to fall on a roll, thankfully on a safe sidewalk. Time freezes as she sees the mare she loves to safety and still tries to reach her with a hoof, separated by an ocean only a few inches long. She doesn’t hear what she’s screaming, but it’s probably her name. Still the center of her world, after all... She closes her eyes, reasoning that if this is the last thing she’ll ever see, if SIlver Spoon is safe, it cannot be so bad...A sharp pain hits one leg and ripples across all of her body. It last only a microsecond, though, before all of her senses shut down one by one until the world finally goes silent and drowns in immaculate darkness. She regrets only the fact that the mare she just saved will have to shed a few more tears because of her.

But if she lives...I’m happy. Forgive me...I love you...I love you...

With only this thought, she faces whatever is coming with peace and without fear. It’s almost...beautiful. She feels her once useless life has found its purpose.

Finally.

The silence of the endless void she starts to drift in is broken by a flutter of wing and a voice. A familiar voice...A too familiar, soothing voice that she never thought to hear again.

Daddy?

Chapter Thirteen: Diamond Tiara

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 13: Diamond Tiara

He sees his daughter trotting happily on her way, finally seeing her at peace, or at least something very close to it. This achievement and the smell of the autumn leaves quells his heart; after all, she’s the only thing he will leave in this world and he wouldn’t have it any other way. She’s isn’t perfect, but, then again, nopony is. Least of all himself.

“So, Mr. Rich...” Applejack inches her way toward the stallion on the wheelchair. “Ah hope it wasn’t anything serious.”

“Just a little, old squabble between father and daughter. I’m starting to like them, with time.” He cracks a little smile.

“Ya know, ah heard some of the things she said an’, um, well ah would have slapped her silly if she had spewed so many mean things to me.” She adds a weak chuckle at the end while mimicking a very painful looking slap with the back of her hoof. She sighs in relief under her hat when he chuckles in return.

“You know, she is the reason I wanted to talk with you. Hope you have time.”

“Always have time for friends, Mr. Rich.” She tips her hat to him.

“I’m glad you think so. This is more than I deserve, after all.” His smile falters, while the orange mare approaches him with concerned eyes. “You see, I wanted you to keep an eye on Tiara after, well, after I’m gone.”

The mare looks flabbergasted, but holds her ground, the gleam of a tear hiding under her hat. “Ah guess we have to have come to this, at some point.”

“Yes, we have. I just wanted to know if I could count on you with that. Having somepony older and wiser that can give her advice, somepony that can be a friend or even a big sister for her. She needs the influence of a mare in her life. An upstanding mare, perhaps.”

“Wel’, ah think ah know somepony like that.” She snorts and stifles a little laugh. “Hope ya know what ye’re doin’. Ah don’t think she likes me very much.” She blinks. “Ah don’t think she likes anypony very much.”

“Well, her heart can’t be conquered so easily, but in your case it’s a bit more complicated. When she sees another mare so close to me, well—”

“Yeah, ah can read her like an open book. She actually thinks ah might fancy ya!” The laugh morphs into an embarrassed grin, her hat covering more than half of her blushing face. “Ah mean, no offense but ah know you’re a married stallion.”

The laughter stops dead, not because he doesn’t appreciate levity, but because this is too important for him. “So, I hope I can trust you on this?”

“Of course you can.” The strong, prideful mare stands there with absolute resolution. “But if ya trust me so much, there’s one thing ah have to know: Why aren’t ya tellin’ her the truth about the whole situation? The truth about you, about her father.”

The wheelchair spins, and his back presents itself to Applejack while his eyes dig for something in the horizon

“Because I’m too weak for that.”

Tiara blinks and the silence after the vision ends.

The landscape returns, as depressing as it was before. A vast, charcoal-colored desert encompasses the horizon and extends in all direction, infinite and merciless. There are no moon or stars up there, in the black sky, so the passage of time seems irrelevant. There’s nothing to make her feel less lonely or to pray to or even a landmark, something that could help her find her way. Not that she has any right to pray, now. She feels neither cold nor hungry, just tired. She can’t do anything but walk with no hope of finding somepony or somepony that can help her. There isn’t anything else to do after all: if she doesn’t do it, she may start thinking. Thinking about things that will cause her to scream her heart out.

“I’ve been walking for so long...I think.” Time has lost meaning. She could have been there for years as far as she’s concerned.

Tiara passes a hoof on her face and notices that she’s completely covered in that awful sand. Touching it feels like ash in her hooves and the smell does nothing but confirm it.

She can’t help but cry softly, not because she doesn’t know where she is, stuck in the worst place in the world, not because all of that dirt making her feel so vulnerable and lost, but because of the false hope that keeps plaguing her heart even now.

She could’ve sworn in multiple forms, in every language of the planet and to every possible authority, all the way up the four princesses and even distant, ancient gods that could possibly exist, that she really saw her father in one of those afternoons of autumn that changed her life. She even saw that country bumpkin at his side...talking about a secret.

A lie, a dream conjured by her desperate mind. The only mare who has been dishonest is her. Her and only her. She had the luxury once of blaming the whole world, including Bloom, for her mistakes, but now it’s just pointless and foalish. This place, this loneliness, is just a consequence, a punishment...

Maybe this is Hell, or Tartarus or whatever they should call it: names won’t change a damn thing. All her mistakes and regrets are the only company she should expect, reflected in that black sky and greyish sand, the ash filling her lungs. After what she did to Spoon, to Bloom, to her father, to everypony she ever loved... She has no hope of seeing good ponies like them here, where hope is long dead.

“I hope she’s alright. Please, Celestia...I hope she’s alright.”

In the worst of places under the world, she can only think of her. She remembers her touch, but it doesn’t give her warmth: in this place there’s no room for it. She falls on her haunches and lies her head down in temporary defeat, too tired and sad to think.

“At least I did something good.”

She draws, or at least tries to, Silver Spoon’s face in the sand, her glasses a little too big for her face and a crude, but pleasant, smile right next to Applebloom with a comically oversized bow. It’s the only place in which those two can’t possibly fight, at least. She tries to remember them being happy and at peace, before they fell in love with that magenta colored disaster, but it doesn’t work. The image of the two ponies she loved trying to kill each other is burned in the back of her mind and she always sees it, every time she blinks.

She doesn’t blame Spoon, though. She can’t: It may sound horribly selfish...It is horribly selfish, but she could have avoided this. A long time ago, on multiple occasions, if she had just opened her eyes and noticed Spoon.

Right in the middle, she starts to draw herself but after some details, like her contour or the shape of her mane, she stops, feeling an unstoppable rage at the mere sight of that face and smudges out the figure with an angry stomp.

“Like you can’t imagine them without you...” Tiara snarls out.

She bends down and gives a quick, awkard kiss to the two figures drawn in the sand. She feels the awful taste of ash in her mouth, but is a small price to pay for respite.

It wasn’t that bad.

“What are you talking about?” She remains unfazed, barely giving much thought to the words from the darkness.

You have a place there. You always have.

“You’re right. I ‘had’ a place there. Now it’s gone.” She picks up a hooffull of sand and lets it slowly seep through her grasp back to the ground. “I’m gone. They’re better off without me.” She shakes and weeps, hiding behind a foreleg.

It’s not too late. It’s never too late to make things right.

“AND WHAT DO YOU KNO—”

She spins on herself, turning toward the voice, but the sound of her anger chokes her mouth, seeing it directed at nothing. The voices speak sweet lies once again, but she’ll have none of it this time. Not this time, no... she’s had enough of that. But something seems to be missing: the silence returns with no comforting words to fill it.

“I’m sorry, please talk to me again.”

She never imagined the day she would be begging for the attention of a disembodied voice, but there’s a first time for everything, as they say.

“W-Who are you?” She squints her eyes as hard as possible but they’re not adjusted to the darkness of the place.

A friend.

“Never been the ‘friend-making type’,” she sighs, almost choking out a sob, thinking of Silver Spoon... The thought perishes, leaving her more miserable than ever before. Now is really not the time.

“Alright, ‘friend’. Where are we? Is this Hell? Or worse? And more importantly is there a way to get out? I’m kind in a hurry.” Straight to the point, like the old, brash, uncaring and smirking Diamond Tiara. Always a use for that attitude, even in the darkest of places.

It’s a place in between. Everypony’s got his personal one. It does not spell the end for you.

The voice sounds calm, detached even: The least threatening disembodied voice Tiara has ever heard. It’s the first she’s ever heard, though, so experience means nothing.

You can’t get out until you will think it’s time.

“Not the end? I was pretty sure it was the end for me.” She blinks and pouts, throwing a curious glare at the voice’s general direction, hoping that to be the right one. “Wait, you said that everyponys got one of this ‘in between thingies’. What are you doing here, then? Shouldn’t you pay me the rent, then?” A weak, forced chuckle follows from the mare. It’s the best joke that’s came out in a while, and nopony else will even know it.

Lost ponies belong together. That’s why I’m here.

“So much for answers...” Tiara groans, defeated, and slumps down with her back on the ash, her eyes staring wildly at the immense black ceiling above her.

It’s never too late to make things right, the voice booms back with same patience and soothing tone as before.

She tries not to sound or look relieved at this: she tries not to believe the same sweet lies.

“I tried, but I guess it wasn’t enough.“ Tiara sniffles, while the voice draws closer and yet she doesn’t see anything.

Do you want to talk?

“Don’t have much of an alternative, have I?” All of a sudden, she feels it. Warmth. It seems like ages since she last felt it, like the warmth of a foreleg circling her shoulder. She doesn’t question it and her mind has no place for fear, instead welcoming any sort of relief. “Anything is better than being alone.”

You’re not alone.

“Well, there’s you, I guess. Still better than nothing. I had somepony before, but I guess I’ll never see them again. But they’ll be okay, even better without me.”

The ones you drew, weren’t they?

“Yeah, but they look better in real life, trust me.”

Why did you say that? Better off without you?

“Because I loved them. More than life itself and I brought them only pain. It’s a long story.” She tries to take a look of the voice she’s speaking to, but the veil of darkness wastes her efforts. Even if she should be afraid or at least suspicious...she isn’t. At all. Somehow she knows him and always did. At least she can clearly tell this is the voice of a stallion.

We have time.

“I guess you’re right, we have all the time we need. It all started with my Daddy. I loved him and I lost him forever, all because I was too selfish. The best dad in the world...”

How’s so?

“There was this mare. There’s always one, after all. I loved her, truly. I think I still do...and that’s where my father comes into the picture.”

Was he in love with her, too? A chuckle seems buried halfway in the question.

“I hope not! It would have just been even more complicated.” A nervous smile follows and quietly dies, drowned by a muffled sob. “She made me happy and I made her happy, even though we started out hating each other. It was just little squabbles between little fillies...But you know the thing about little fillies?”

They grow up?

“I like you. You’re smart.” She smirks. “At least she did. The growing up part. Things is, the love of my life just happened to find me in the darkest moment of my life. Even though I was so in love with her, even though with her I felt complete and worthwhile—”

Did you really need somepony else to feel like that?

“Maybe. Maybe if at least a pony loves me...I won’t feel like the villain of somepony’s else story. Nopony loves real villains so, to use an understatement, I valued any kind of love and friendship that were given to me. Even if it was so little...Even if I didn’t deserve it.”

Everypony deserves to be loved, Tiara. Always.

“Not me, after what I did to him. For him, it all started with a mare, too. I guess you could call her my mother. Not that she had any proof of that. But anyway...She left him. Just one day, no explanations, but a flimsy one. I guess there was yet another mare in the picture, if you know what I mean.” She flashes a sultry smirk with little to no sentiment behind it, just to drive home the point.

Ouch. I hope you’re really sure about that.

“I still have nightmares about those screams behind the wall. It’s like I can still hear them.” She shudders. “It all began because of that mare.”

I’m tired of this!a voice sneers, this one different from the fatherly tone that spoke to her moment’s before.

She closes her eyes just for a second and that shrill, hateful voice pierces her brain like a bullet, thoughts and words that aren’t her own except in her nightmares.

I’m tired of you waiting like that. I could be more than some kind of emotional crutch.

The voice sobs and cracks. If that mare were capable of crying, Tiara would swear she was doing exactly that. Something feels missing, though. Or actually, found again...She dares not to whisper that word, but her lips can't stop themselves, "Mom...?"

What happened with yours, then? the other, friendlier presence speaks again, washing away the remnants of that awful moment. It seems like a dream...or a long distant memory. Maybe both. But this supposition falls into pieces as soon as Tiara dismiss it as such.

“She was happy with me. So happy that she didn’t want to hide it from the rest of the world, starting with my Dad. Looking back at it, I think it was the right choice. I owed him the truth and he owed to know that I’m a f—”

She bites her lip to the point of cracking the skin and tasting blood, but she doesn’t feel the pain. She doesn’t feel anything at all, least of all fear or shame.

“...A fillyfooler.” She sighs, “Can’t believe I admitted it.”

It’s just who you are. You shouldn’t be afraid.

“Being what I am is what has caused me all my troubles. I wish I could have just apologized, but...there wasn’t time. I was the thing he probably hated the most and I couldn’t tell him. He saw it!” A whimper, a squeal of pure pain comes from her throat as tears rile her cheeks and warm to a burn on her coat. “He saw it...the thing two mares do when they’re in love,” she repeats, staring at the comforting darkness of her own forelegs.

I’m so sorry for what happened to you, so sorry. I truly am.Tiara can hear his voice break. She can imagine a comforting hoof patting her head. What happened next?

“He couldn’t bear it. I thought I had lost him then and there, but that wasn’t the case. He went on to live for a few more weeks with only the company of that disgusting little thing of a daughter. I had no excuses, and even if he could’ve talked to me, what would have he said? How much I disgusted him? How much I lied, no, Bloom and I lied to him? Even so, I never left his side until he was...gone.” She sniffles again, “I just hope he found some peace without me. Do you think he would have accepted it? I mean, if he knew, if I had told him?”

He loved you. I’m sure of this. That alone would answer that. I think that there was more to that than there seemed to be.

“I really would like to believe that. Just a few words from him, a few clear words, would have been enough. More than I deserved.”

And what happened to your fillyfriend? Surely she couldn’t have left you in a moment like that—

“She did just that.” She stares at the void in front of her, her voice soulless and monotone, barely aware of anything. “She blamed herself more than I did and...did it for my sake. I hated her for it. A lot. But with time I understood her reasons. Besides, I just couldn’t let her go. Once you love somepony like that it’s impossible to stop doing so. It’s not like flipping a switch.”

I never thought that.

“None of the ponies I know think so, sadly. That’s where Silver Spoon comes into the picture. Oh, Spoony...” She sulks. “What have I done to her? I couldn’t be her switch...Why does everypony I touch ends up like that?”

YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME!, She prayed to hear Silver just one more time. She got her wish, twisted beyond repair, directly taken from the worst moment of their life.

The six words carve into her conscience and keep booming and echoing in the remains of her heart and soul. She keeps feeling responsible, guilty of neglect, guilty of having stolen Spoon’s heart and condemned her to years of longing and rage. Maybe she knew all these years about those feelings and didn’t act so she could keep watching Spoon’s plight, so she could feel...

Desired.

Fulfilled.

Adored...

“She was my replacement. Yeah, I know it’s horrible. It’s like the whole universe is telling me that.”

I didn’t say anything.

“She was my best and only friend. Never asked anything in return, never judged me and she always had a kind word for me when I felt down. When I was with her, we felt like we could take on the whole world.” A glimmer of light in the abyss, summoned only by words of praise. Not a figure of speech, even. She could swear to just saw it, a glimmer in the distance, even for a second. “She was there for me when everything happened, told me that she loved me and—I guess that was it. Maybe there was something in me that thought the same, that knew it was right, healthy and fair.”

You followed your heart again. That is nothing to be ashamed of.

“I can’t help but to feel like that, at least. Things were looking good, really good...Too good. I could have just lived the rest of my days with her and have been happy for once, but I wanted closure. I just couldn’t be satisfied. I knew I needed to know if it was really the end for me and Bloom. I wanted to know if she really felt that way. Turns out neither of us did. Turns out neither of us could give up the other.”

I guess your best friend thought so too.

“Once again, I was seen in the embrace of somepony I loved and all three of us suffered. They had a fight, totally out of nowhere and---I tried to save her. Silver Spoon, I mean. She was angry, confused and desperate about the whole thing. She would have never seen it coming. Nopony could have see it coming. So I saved her. I wasn’t totally successful as you can gather from the fact that I’m here. But you know what? I deserve this.” She wipes out her tears, unaware of them until they rilie her cheeks, and stands on all fours facing the dark in front of her with dignity. “You said that I can leave whenever I want.”

Kind of.

“But I don’t want to. I won’t cry about that, even. I simply don’t deserve it. I tried and tried and tried to be happy at the expense of the ponies that loved me. No more! No more fathers that have to pay for foalish lies, no more sweet, beautiful mares that have to run away from me for guilt. No more of best friends...” She touches her face to see it completely stained with tears. They have to be: there are no clouds and no pegasi to blame. Pride doesn’t mean anything anymore and sadness is no more a hated companion.

“No more best friends that lose their heads because of me.”

Are you sure about that? Don’t you want to see her again? Don’t you love her?!

“Of course I do, but...I’m afraid of going back to her. I promised myself that I wouldn’t hurt her again and I did just that.”

She will suffer more if you refuse. Give yourself another chance.

“I’ve done enough.” She says in a somber tone, “I was right the first time. I’m poison. The best I could do was saving her life and she would have never been in peril if not for me. I just want to stay here, thinking that I did some good in my life.”

You can’t give up like that. You can’t change what happened and no matter how painful it was, life goes on. It has to. Ponies will always do mistakes, but that doesn’t mean life isn’t worth it. You should go on. At least for Spoon’s sake.

A spark, a glimmer of force flows in her veins. She can see it: a tiny ray of moonlight entering. “What if I’m right about me ruining other ponies’ lives?”

You never did ruin her life, Tiara. Not all things happen because of you. Not all things are your fault. The world turns even without you. For some ponies you may be the center of their world, but it’s their heart that makes their choices.

“You’re saying I should just blame her, instead? Is that it?”

No. I’m saying you should stop shifting the blame onto something or somepony and just live. Cherish what you have and never look back. Go back to her, go back to the ones you love.

“Because they’re so few. M-Maybe you’re right. If I still have a chance. Oh, Celestia. I have to see if-If she’s alright. Maybe she’ll be relieved to see me---No, overjoyed, maybe! Maybe this time I won’t screw up!” She chuckles a bit, “Oh, if I had a bit for every time I said that!”

At least you try. At least you have regrets. At least you still have time. Time to tell the truth and how much you love her...You showed her that you’re willing to die for her. Now she needs somepony to live for her.

“It almost like you’re speaking by personal experience. I-I want to thank you. It’s always nice to have somepony to talk with.” Her hoof wanders in the dark, expecting to meet another one. Instead, she feels an embrace, a strong, caring, comforting embrace that seemed long gone. She isn't afraid, because, somehow, she recognizes the strength in those forelegs. He called her Tiara...

My daughter is not a filly anymore. I love you, Tiara.

“I love you, Daddy. I’m so sor—”

Don’t cry anymore. The only thing I ever wanted was for you to be happy. Now wake up and do so.

She can feel her heartbeat again and that perfect crescent Moon stands tall in the sky.

He sees his daughter still standing at his side after such a long day. He’d like to talk to her, to tell her that he loves her and he will miss her. To tell her the truth and that she doesn’t hate her. He never did.

Too weak and too ill to say that, he sees guilt and shame in her eyes whenever he looks at her daughter, without knowing that his fate was sealed before. The lies he had to forge, even his wife had to play that part...The last thing she said to him was that Tiara didn’t deserve to be left in the dark. The last strain between a mother and a daughter, just to keep the lie from fading.

“You can have anything you want,” he blurts out. Whatever she wants to be, whatever way she wants to live, he will love her. Always. But the words fall on sleeping ears.

She twitches in her slumber, covered up to her chin with a blanket on that old chair, plagued by some bad dream, probably.

He prays to be forgiven and for one last chance. One last moment to comfort and protect her. But this wish will always be a dream. A dream in which he can barely hear a flutter of wings...

Chapter Fourteen: Silver Spoon

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter Fourteen: Silver Spoon

“You really owe me an explanation.” Silver Spoon shows a glare worthy of the gleam of a knife. The bright orange pegasus fidgets and looks at the ground below while she shields herself with her wings—a futile gesture at best, desperate a worst.

“You aren’t happy. I think.”

“You don’t say. Guess where I’m going tomorrow?”

“Honeymoon in Las Pegasus?” She flashes a toothy and innocent grin. A huge drop of cold sweat crosses Scoot’s brow.

“A crappy flat in Manehattan.”

“Well, it could be worse—”

“To meet my fillyfriend’s ex.”

“Oh.” Her wings deflate and her gaze returns to the grass beneath.

“Yeah. That’s so worth an ‘oh’. How could you, Scoots? I trusted you.”

“How could I? My best friend asked this of me, Spoon!” A fierce resolve boils the pegasus blood, and her voice. “I didn’t knew where she was, I haven’t seen her in ages...Where exactly are you getting at?”

“I thought she was mine,” Spoon snarls and pounces the ground forward. “I thought that the chapter with your bumpkin friend was closed. Finished.” Her breath comes in short frantic pants, but she still tries to sound furious instead of exasperated. “She hurt Tiara enough and you want her to suffer again?!”

“And what about my friend, Spoon? What about me? What should I’ve done? She asked me, in tears, to see Tiara and—”

“You should have said no! You wanted for me and Tiara to get together and you want my Tiara to see that-that bitchwho broke her heart? Why?”

“Because she needs this. Because she’s my best friend,” she says coldly. “Because she wants some peace for herself and, no matter whose fault it is, she never had after that day.”

“And what am I to you? You had to choose, didn’t you?” She never considered or pondered upon this, but she feels for the first time to have been betrayed by the pegasus mare. It hurts more than it should and more than she expected. “What about my peace?”

“I always cared for Applebloom. Far more than a friend, ever since I can remember.” She hides her blush between tears as every piece of the mosaic comes together. “So when she asks me something, whatever that may be, I just do it. Happy now?”

Not even taking the time to blink, the pegasus takes off and flies away, her features disappearing in the blue skies above.

“Scoots, I’m sorry!” She rushes toward the shrinking orange dot in the distance, but when it comes to her legs versus her wings... She has no hope to catch her. Not now. Not ever. Another broken heart that follows in the shadows. It’s always the same, whether they live on the earth or in the sky. She has never felt so close to her friend like now and she hates herself for failing to reach out and touch her.

It’s the first time she’s hurt that ‘blank flank,’ and she regrets it from the bottom of her soul.

She may have just lost her friend. She hopes not to lose anything else.

The scent of hospitals.

She hates this scent more than anything in the world, and studying medicine hasn’t done anything to make her think otherwise. It may have made it worse, actually. It smells of tension, uneasiness and pain. It smells of bad luck and regrets. It smells of mistakes and not telling a loved one how much they are valued until it’s too late.

Every nurse that runs in the corridors, every stretcher that comes crashing around the corner and every doctor worriedly waving around with a magical hue some tablets tells her, plain and simple, “It could be Tiara...” That’s what everypony around her must be thinking, lonely in a sea of faces immersed in prayer or regret, but how many of them are actually responsible for their own loved ones misfortunes?

“Still the center of the world, right Spoon?” she mutters to herself, rubbing a hoof against the cold surface of the bench she sits on.

The love of her life almost died for her and all she can think of is how much she’s screwed up. Every turn of the clock, every second that further separates her from seeing Tiara is just a smaller part of the punishment, a retribution that will inevitably arrive and, without any pretense of sugarcoating it, kick her in the butt until it stops being funny.

A small smirk escapes her. This is kind of joke Tiara would like. She’ll love it once she hears it.

Yes.

The two of them will go back to laughing and saying stupid jokes, just being themselves, two mares deeply in love, sappy as they can be...

Sappy as they can be...

Once again, she ponders about her place beside Tiara and she knows nothing will be the same. Sometimes she felt used by her, even hurt by her. She has repaid her fully to say the least. She wants to see Tiara again, to touch her again, to love her again. But those sweet nothings she whispered in her ear, those solemn promises they shared, were for nought.

She had saved her. In so many ways she had saved her. Tiara saved her from her own madness, saved her undeserving hide, saved her soul... She had done so much for her and all she had did was stand by the side and watch as she almost lost her forever. Her love for Tiara was bested by all the vile pettiness stored in her heart and this...this is the thing for which she will never forgive herself. She adjust her glasses and hides herself from the world, like she should from Tiara.

With this company, she doesn’t exactly have a choice.

“Do we still have to fight?” the bored, heavily accented mare whispers, staring at the ceiling.

“Huh?” She turns her back to the yellow mare, finding herself inches from a very exasperated orange face, one that blows a lock of mane out from her eye. The glare she launches at Spoon basically means ‘no way out, sweetheart,’ in nearly all the languages of the world.

“Fight over Tiara ah mean. Ya still want to do that?” she says, without removing her gaze from the ceiling and with all the enthusiasm of somepony at work who’s going to be fired the next day.

“I told you I’m sorry,” Spoon spits out. “Isn’t that enough?”

“You know what you did. You got it lightly,” Babs mutters, eliciting a glare from Silver Spoon that quickly dies out. She adjusts her shades, poking lightly her swollen eye. It still hurts.

“I don’t want to fight anymore. I could say I’m sorry one hundred times and it still wouldn’t be enough, but I’ll say it anyway.”

“Good. ‘Cause ah don’t want it either. Tiara wouldn’t want that.” A profound sadness is etched in her eyes, mirrored by the grey mare. “Ah hope you’re happy now. You won.”

Both the mares by Bloom’s side shoot a bewildered gaze. Spoon’s jaw nearly falls to the ground, while Babs’s mouth curls into an irritated grimace.

“Tiara was willing to die for ya. An’ you were willing to kill me for her. It’s bucked up, but it is what it is.” Bloom lifts her head and stares blankly at the wall in front of her, her voice breaking for the briefest of moments. A couple passes by, a stallion with a bandaged head warmly greeting a young pegasus mare that flies into his embrace.

“She would have done the same for you. Don’t be ridiculous. And she was the one to jump on you on the first occasion.”

Spoon would be angry normally. She should be. But her actions weigh too heavily on her conscience now. Tiara saw her uglier side, her darkest side. Not the Silver Spoon she fell in love with. That mare will always be in the shadow of that moment...

“And ah shouldn’t have. Ah love her and I’ll probably always will. But what ah did to her and the reasons ah had to do what ah did, well...” She hugs her own shoulders, her eyes filling with tears, “It was just a dream. The time I had with her was only a beautiful dream. We had to wake up.” She wipes her face with a foreleg as her cousin immediately comes to her side, letting Bloom to rest her head on her chest. “I just wanted for it to last a little more, even just a day.”

“Coz...” She strokes and caresses her cousin’s mane with the utmost care.

“Ah knew ah already lost her before. Ah knew there was nothing else for me, no place by her side, but ah still wanted her. Ah prayed and hoped and despaired and just wanted her for me again, but no. The thought that she could have went on with her life didn’t faze me. Ah bet you must be gloating, seeing me this vulnerable, but ah can’t help it.”

“You won’t believe me even if I say so.” She hates her. She has hated her for such a long time. But, changing a few details, she could have been in her place, each of them hiding in the shadows of their own feelings: stalking, praying for any chance they could have, just for the mare they both lost. Longing for an acknowledgement, for her lips to be graced again by Tiara’s kiss. She sees this broken mare and sees herself, no more and no less.

“What if you really are the one she wants. Will you break her heart again?”

“What if you stop asking yourself ‘if’ and ‘but’ and hope that she makes it instead,” the angry retort follows, muffled by the chest of Babs Seed.

For once, Silver Spoon has nothing to say. The wisest advice she’s gotten in a while and she had to hear it from Applebloom. Everything pointed to this, actually, for both her and Tiara. Forget the past, forget the eventualities, grudges and bad memories and just live. Her mind goes back to their first night together, the very best, most loving and wonderful moment she had ever shared with Tiara, only to have it tainted moments later by vengeful thoughts, the blissful afterglow poisoned by folly and jealousy. She should have known better. She should have just stopped, let things sort themselves out and, even if the very idea rips out her heart and stomps it, given up on Tiara if necessary.

“I betrayed her. She only wanted to be happy and I betrayed her.”

Applebloom stops her sobbing and gives a curious look to the grey mare.

“If I’d been a better mare, I wouldn’t have done this to her. Even if she chose you.”

“She didn’t want to choose. She couldn’t choose. It’s true that she had a moment of weakness with me, but she still couldn’t. She cares about you, Spoon. She always did. After she kissed me...” Spoon noticeably shivers and almost gags at the mere thought of that moment, “after she kissed me, she looked so guilty, so ashamed...”

Until I barged in and made everything worse...

“Tiara’s never been the kind of pony that thinks ahead. So, at least ah want you to hear her out. If you’ve really got to blame somepony, blame me.”

“Of course I will. Hearing Tiara out, I mean. I owe her this. I owe her everything. Do you think I’m some kind of crazy, jealous, unbalanced mare—”

The two mares shoot at her a gaze so piercing, so definite and destructive that her words, and any kind of justification, withers and die, turning into the bitter taste of dead grass in her mouth. With good reason, too: it’s always sad to notice one is saying nonsense right when it’s coming from her mouth.

“Not with her,” Spoon continues, “hate me all you want, hit me all you want, but if there’s a thing that won’t change is how much I love her...and how much I deserve to be lying in that bed instead of her.”

“She wouldn’t want that. She loves you too much.”

With that, her mouth hangs open for a brief second, but no words come out, with no need to come out. Put in her place like nopony’s business by the pony she hates...

No.

No more hate. No more regrets or jealousy or tears or repellent behavior. If she had loved Tiara as much as she had said, nothing would have happened...

“Forgive me,” Spoon whispers, “for everything I’ve done to you. I don’t hate you anymore.” She closes her eyes, expecting another punch in the face.

“It still won’t be enough...” Bloom says, her voice not betraying any of her expectation. “...But it’s a start.” She gives Spoon a friendly poke on her shoulder. Not friendly, actually, but at least it wasn’t in the face. The farm pony smiles at her and Spoon returns it, incredulous.

“Raise a hoof agains’ me again and you’re toast.” Her stare pierces right through her soul as the orange mare to her left glances at her and everything falls back into place. She knows it won’t be easy, or even possible, but, like Applebloom said, it’s still a start.

The familiar and long awaited face of a unicorn doctor with a golden brown coat greets the three with a smile. “Ah, there you are. I have good news: your friend is awake and well.”

Applebloom flashes a genuine smile of relief and hugs her cousin, almost squeezing the air out of the very puzzled mare. The kind of look that expresses relief, yes, but also uncertainty on what else to feel or say. She rolls her eyes with an embarrassed smile, slowly submitting to the affectionate gesture. Spoon doesn’t move, doesn’t jump around of joy, but remains in her seat, wearing a soft smile.

Her eye still hurts a bit, but for the first tears of joy in a while, it’s worth it.

“How is she, doctor? Is she hurt? Ah mean, ah know she is, but—”

“Could have been worse, I must say. She suffered a bad concussion and lost consciousness for a while, but nothing to worry about. her mental faculties are intact—”

“You call this food?! It tastes like sweat and horseshoes!” From a nearby room, she hears that shrill, unpleasant and absolutely wonderful voice she knows and loves so dearly.

“For better or for worse.” The unicorn clears his voice and adjusts his glasses with a magic touch, “Her leg is what worries us the most.”

“Do ya think she won’t be able to...?” Applebloom takes a step backward while Silver Spoon’s muscles tense, grasping at the chair with her hoof with such a force that it starts to creak.

“I would rule this out, but we’re still keeping her here for a couple of days, just for re-analysis. Would you care to see her, perhaps?”

“Are you sure about that?” Spoon gets up, pushing her shades further against the bridge of her nose. “What if she’s still shocked or confused or perhaps even—”

“Go to her Spoon. I mean it. Ah think you’ll want to at least thank her for everything.”

“What if she doesn’t want to see me? I mean, what if she’s angry or—”

Applebloom rolls her eyes and nods to her cousin, who flashes a malevolent grin. Before Spoon can open her mouth and object some more, a very tan hoof shoves her, nonchalantly, into the room. In less than a second, the grey mare tumbles over and skids face-first on the floor, coming to a stop mere inches from the bed. The curious face of a lovely mare sits just beside the sheets, waiting in a wheelchair.

“Hi, Spoon,” she chirps, stopping Spoon’s shaking with a quick peck on her nose.

Silver jumps on her, gripping her Tiara in a crushing hug, almost rattling her out the wheelchair. Tiara squeals of pain and follows it with an awkward giggle.

“Sorry, did it hurt?” Tiara gives an impish smile before adjusting her mane. So overwhelmed by happiness, Spoon doesn’t notice the locks of her mane peeking out from beneath her bandaged head, disheveled and dirty; it’s a far cry from her dignified elegance. A green blanket covers her hind leg, with the other one poking from out the blanket and wrapped in a cast. It’s the same for her left foreleg that rests above her belly and lies suspended with a strap around her neck. In this pitiful state she still finds the will to smile. It’s too much for SIlver Spoon to bear.

I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry! I’m sor-sorry!” She plummets to the ground at Tiara’s hooves, exploding in a series of broken, throaty sobs. Tears stream out of her eyes with no end in sight, nor the desire to do so. All the frustration, joy and confusion at seeing the pony she loves more than anything in the world is too much for a frail grey coated form to contain.

Tiara’s free foreleg reaches for her cheek and strokes it, “There there, Spoony. Don’t cry anymore. I’m tired of seeing you cry. You’re too pretty for that.” She releases a relaxed giggle.

“But it’s my fault. It’s my fault you’re hurt. It’s my fault,” she sniffles, hiding the weeping mess of her face by burying it in the blanket.

“You still have me, you didn’t hurt anypony and I didn’t lose you forever. I don’t care what happened. I’m so happy at seeing you anyway that I would jump around the room and then on you like, in a second. But my everything still hurts, so that will have to wait.” Another giggle follows which sounds like music of the heavens to Spoon’s ears. The smile gracing Tiara is more beautiful, sincere and peaceful than she has ever looked like.

“What I did was horrible, but seeing you like that—Heck, even seeing you again is enough. I thought it was my fault for...” She looks at Tiara’s injuries again and wishes to have had them inflicted on herself instead, tenfold.

“It’s my fault, too,” she sighs, slumping her back into the chair. “I came here for closure, but I didn’t think this through. Have you ever loved somepony so much that it messes with your head?”

The two mares awkwardly look at each other while thunderous laugh tries to escape from a forced grin, the two ultimately unable to contain their vibrant guffaw. They dissolve in a tearful laughter that’s both simple and refreshing, the kind of laughter to be had when the pain finally goes away; a laughter earned with so many tears, yet still worth it. The laughter of their fillyhood, of those uncomplicated days, returns to stay this time.

“T-thank you, T. For everything. You’re my hero.” She cleans her face with a hoof and gets on all fours, caressing Diamond Tiara’s cheek in return. She gives a small sigh of relief and composes herself, removing her sun glasses and polishing them on her chest. She stops when she notices Tiara’s worried look.

“What happened to your face?” Tiara covers her mouth in disbelief with the same hoof.

“Oh! This.” Her bruised eye starts hurting again, reminding her that it’s still there and Tiara’s graceful presence can’t cure injuries...yet. “Bloom did it. Totally deserved it, too. At least she warned me about it,” she chuckles.

“Oh, Spoon...” The wheelchair spins and Tiara approaches the grey mare and rests her head on Spoon’s chest, “At least somepony used my shades for something. Did it hurt?”

“You should have seen it. She was, like Pow. Knocked me flat. I knew she was strong, but damn! But you know what they say: jerks always get what’s coming to them.”

“You’re not a jerk. And I’m not a hero: I just love my friend. Love her more than life itself.”

“Don’t say that, again. It wasn’t worth i—”

“Yes, it was! You mean the world to me. You’ve always been there for me. Always, ever since I can remember. The only thing you wanted was for me to love you and I do! I always will. I had to save you. I wanted you to live because it was the least I could have done for all the happiness you have given me. I would do it again and again, until every bone in my body is grinded into dust.”

Spoon is moved beyond belief by her lover’s words, but still, there’s something missing, something wrong in all of this even if it sounds so wonderful and sincere.

A little too fast, maybe.

“You know, I won’t get away if you talk a little slower. You can breath sometime.”

“Uh, sorry. I got so many things to say at the tip of my brain thingy and I fear they may slip away and everything, and I don’t want to let you down. You know, I’m a bit confused because of this,” she points at her bandaged head. “Doc said it’s temporary, though, so don’t worry.”

She circles Tiara with her forelegs as slowly as possible, inching herself toward the mare with care to avoid bumping her by accident, and buries her muzzle in Tiara’s neck. In response, the broken mare caresses her mane and kisses her forehead. “So, I guess you still want me, right?”

“Now and forever. I’m yours.”

“I’m a horrible pony.”

“You’re not. You were just desperate. I’ve been there.”

“I’m jealous and violent to say the least. I’m also dumb.”

“True. But at least you don’t smell.”

“But you’re okay with that?”

“I still love you. Everypony makes mistakes.”

“You’re too kind with me. I don’t deserve it.”

“That’s also true. The kindness part I mean,” Tiara snickers. “ I don’t want to ever see you like that because everypony deserves to be happy. Even me. Even you...” Tiara gives her another small peck on the nose. “Especially you.”

“I’m such a mess...I-I don’t want to be a burden for you.”

“You’re not. I promised you and I’ll promise it again. I’ll do everything in my power to make you happy. “

“I’m not worth the effort. I’m jus—” Her words are stopped by the gentle touch of a hoof on her lips.

“For me, you are worth everything. You were there for me at the worst moment of my life. You are the reason I’m still here.

“Still here?” she says, confused and dumbfounded.

“You will probably think I’m crazy, but there was this place. I mean, after I woke up I found myself in this dark and boring place. I was so sad a-and desperate. I thought you and everypony else would be better off without me.”

“No! How could you say that?! The only thing I wanted was seeing you again!”

“That’s just it. I thought about you. I knew that I had to come back for you. I gave myself another chance and I wanted to live it with my favorite pony. It’s you, by the way. “

She listens. She listens to Tiara’s dream or delusion, never judging or throwing some bewildered gaze, anything that could say she doesn’t believe her love. She listens of her love re-examining her life, her mistakes and her faults, and how the love of a little grey pony saved her.

“You were there for me and you’ve always been. Whenever I was happy or sad, whenever I needed a friend or somepony to love. My turn now.” The broken mare grasps both of her hooves with her free one, holding them lovingly.

“I-I don’t what to say.” Somewhere in her heart, she asks herself if this isn't too easy, if this is more than she deserves, if she should be happy just because Tiara said so, if she should still be afraid of losing that wonderful mare and feel guilt even in her embrace. But once Tiara initiates the kiss, that kiss given with all the purity and kindness that the Spoony in Tiara’s dreams always had, every doubt and fear loses might and meaning, save for one.

“Just answer this. Do you love me?” The question scares her, but there’s no hurry, no tension radiating from Tiara’s blue eyes.

“I love you, Diamond Tiara. Always will and always did. Until the end of this world.” And this time...This time ‘I’ will be the one worthy of your love.

“I love you too.” Her free arm grips Spoon again, pulling her close, choking her sobs against Spoon’s body. “Never do that again, please! That wasn’t you...Please, be again the SIlver Spoon I know and love.”

“I am, Tiara. I always will be. For you.”

“Thank you. My Spoony is finally back.”

“And you came back for me, right?”

Tiara answers with another kiss. Nothing more is needed, but forgiveness and the sweet taste of her lips The pony she loves is with her again.

Everything is alright.

Saying goodbye is never easy. Especially not for a pony once loved. Tiara has to do it twice. She doesn’t believe that a pony isn’t strong enough to do it, but if her presence, her mere presence, can soften the blow then this is good.

“I guess...it’s time. Are you sure you don’t want to come back?” Tiara tries to not look sad when she says that. She’s always been a strong pony, but this facade has already cracked long before this moment. Spoon is still her glue, waiting in silence behind her wheelchair.

“Yeah, ah still have something to do. Ah’m not ready yet.”

“For going back home with me? I kind of expected it.”

“Well, ah guess ah can’t disappoint you anymore.” They both giggle at that, a brief and pure giggle, just like two old friends would exchange. The hate melts away and the sky brightens as a result. Even the steam of the departing trains seems to avoid the zone where these three, rejuvenated mares are, out of respect. “Ah’ll miss this.” She wipes away a tear between a laugh and the other.

“I know you will. I’ll miss that, too. I’ll miss you.” She doesn’t know how to feel about this, that look etched in Tiara’s eyes... a look that will come back again, no doubt, every time she’ll think of Applebloom. No matter how much she can complain, that’s part of Tiara and nothing will change that. A part of Tiara that she will come to love, just as she loves the whole pony.

“Could ya do one last thing for me?” Bloom approaches the two with a pleading look. Spoon’s heart skips a beat as a result, but something inside her says: “Not this time.” The Silver Spoon Tiara knows and loves is here to stay.

“What is it?”

“Say somethin’ fancy. Somethin’ deep and meaningful and sweet and—”

“Heartwarming?” Tiara smiles and she looks just like the word.

“That’s it. Somethin’ that ya always used to say. Jus’ one last time.”

Tiara takes a deep breath and closes her eyes, her smile still gracing her face. “Thank you for having loved me. Thank you for showing me I was wrong and there wasn’t just hate in my wake. Even if we can’t change the past, you showed me that I could change, at least for somepony I loved. And even if—”

On the verge of tears, she bites her lip and steels herself.

Spoon grasps her hoof with her own to remind that she’s not alone. Maybe that’s why she needed to come here from the start. A little gesture of kindness can save a pony.

“Even if things between us didn’t turn out the way we wanted, I knew I would love again.” Tiara grasps her hoof even harder than before, making a sweet pain ripple across it. “The ponies I needed were right beside me my whole life.”

“That’s what ah was talkin’ about.” She follows Spoon’s example and hugs Tiara with care and affection, following a delicate and precise series of movements to not harm her in any way. “Ah’ll miss this. More than anything in the world.”

“You’ll be alright. You’re the smartest blank flank in the world.”

“I’ll continue your dream.” Spoon breaks her silence and the tearful goodbye of the two. “I promise.”

“Ya mean it?” Bloom’s happiness makes a strong contrast with Tiara’s bewildered stare, but it’s nothing she can’t handle. Spoon solemnly nods before the yellow mare throws herself at her too, squeezing her ribs in a ferocious hug. “Take care of her,” she whispers.

“I will.”

The two broken mares leave without regrets and without words of hate. She can see in Tiara’s smile that she thinks so too and she feels a sense of sweet accomplishment.

The steam rises around them one last time as they board the train, but even now, they see the world as it is: a world that it’s got the other in it and they couldn't be happier. They will have to work for this...or at least Spoon will have to. She knows it that it will never be as easy as it was, that their happy ending is far from close, but leaving guilt to dictate this outcome, letting rage and jealousy to overshadow the love she has for Tiara...

That’s out of the question.

Days pass and the wounds both in heart and soul finally mend. Every time she visits her, it seems that the sad place that was once her house now radiates joy. The fact that she’s never came across one single terrified servant says a lot.

She could see that something happened to the mare she loves, something grand and important, something that her mere company and affection couldn’t achieve alone. But she never presses the issue. Closure, as she always called it, is here to stay and it can always be seen in that sweet smile of hers.

Sappy as they can be...

And all the time of the world to be it.

The day she finally got rid of the cast was not unlike a butterfly that emerges from its cocoon, the remains of those sad days finally behind them forever. But something still felt missing during those days.

Those afternoons of studying were never again interrupted by an orange pegasus with a messy mane like they used to.

An orange pegasus that she hurt and wanted to apologize to more than anything. An orange pegasus that once helped Spoon find her love, because she never had the chance with the one she loved...

But a tiny glimmer of hope remains, after all. There were some days, wherever she had just wanted to take a walk or go see Tiara, that she would just stand there completely dry while everyone around her would be completely soaked wet, almost like there was a hole in the cloud banks pregnant of rain, a hole from which the Sun always shone upon her.

She would look up and simply whisper: “Thank you.”

Tiara’s excited hoofsteps echo through to hallway to her room. She had missed a lot of these little things and only now has she come to love some of them. Laying between the soft sheets, she waits for her lover to come...to bed, of course. She laughs her flank off for her dirty mouth, but in her heart she knows it’s harmless. In fact, a few weeks ago, she thought she could have never made these jokes again, to never have somepony to wait for. She’s taken a lot of time just to freshen herself for their first night together after a while.

As expected, the moment she enters the room, her bright coat glowing thanks to the moonlight and her eyes scintillating like stars, her heart soars out of her chest. She hops on the bed with a giggle and gently removes the blanket out of Spoon.

“I, uh, I wrote something for you.” She whips out a piece of paper from the nearby drawer and clears her voice.”You know, just to make everything like, romantic and all. Hope you don’t mind.”

Spoon simply nods and smiles of approval while Tiara begins.

I wake up every day

Hoping for things to change

I dream up of better days

Until I see your gaze

You watched me from afar

While in my sadness I was going too far

I had this dream of me and you

The day I felt most blue

I needed you because I felt alone

But your love has saved us both

Tiara groans and hides the paper back in the drawer, slamming it with an exasperated sigh. “I know it’s horrible. “

“Well, no. It was sweet, actually.” In truth, it’s probably one of the worse poems Spoon has ever heard. Still, it’s the thought that counts, as they say. “Sweetest thing anypony ever said to me.”

“Sappy as we can be...” Tiara whispers and their hearts beat as one.

Their little play time starts and the lips of the two mares cross over into each other’s place, like two majestic birds circling each other in a courting dance, patiently waiting for the moment to join. Tiara’s lips particularly indulge on one spot: Spoon’s eye.

The magenta mare coats her eyelid in small kisses before dancing across her cheekbones, her jawline, her chin and her neck, tickling all over. She lets out a lustful laugh before feeling Tiara’s chest on her own and its pleasant weight collapsing on her own, sending the grey mare’s back rustling on the sheets. Spoon’s hooves firmly grasp Tiara’s withers, allowing their lips to finally meet with hot intensity and her tongue slides into her lover’s maw.

Diamond Tiara doesn’t lose her momentum and with cat like grace wraps her wet appendage around Spoon’s own, affirming her dominance and letting Spoon moan in their shared bliss. Just the way they like it. Both mares’ hooves move along their exquisite contours with the aching need to touch every nook, every hidden spot of their physiques, sharing their body heat, their very breaths in perfect harmony.

Her hind legs squeeze around Tiara’s waist as her lover’s tongue escapes her mouth to dart down again on her neck, sliding down and down towards the grey fluff on her chest. Her purple orbs shoot a look of amazement as an unexpected pain stings where Tiara’s voracious tongue is doing her magic. She sees the magenta nymph gnawing on her coat while Spoon’s thighs surrender to the pressure and abandon her legs to fall, defeated onto the bed, opening and exposing her puffy, pink and wet prize to the world, or at least to Tiara’s looming shadow. One last kiss and her favourite spot starts to tingle as she sees a violet mane slide down between her legs. She rolls her eyes and sighs out of delight. “Tiara...”

“Still my name, beautiful.”

Diamond pushes her hips forward and pins her hoof on the bed before thrusting forward to brush her marehood so close, too close to Spoon’s, so much as to feel the raging heat radiating from it and, despite being mere inches from her, agonizing over the distance.

Tiara’s teasing, warm breath on her slit is everything she needs to go wild. The tip of Tiara’s tongue dances over her pink treasure, sliding up and down her length with just one tiny millimeter of flesh, not a great step forward compared to the sweet breeze from her mouth. That’s all part of Tiara’s game, of course. She wants for Spoon to beg, just to concede one more lap of her tongue, to let that wonderful wet thing of hers fondle and smother her clitoris, to brush against her inner walls and to finally plunge itself inside her...To give up her pride to her lover and to be utterly complete and utterly fucked.

…

Pride is overrated.

But before she can say, scream or beg for anything, she opens her eyes to see Tiara’s delicious puppy dog eyes, staring in awe at her sex, her tongue sticking out on the side undecided. Her ravenous lust disappears in foalish ingenuity: sudden and yet, somehow, still adorable.

“Tiara, is everything alright?” she asks with a nervous giggle.

“It’s nothing, it’s just that...I never noticed how beautiful all this is. That I’m alive and this is real...I love you, Spoony.”

“And I love you, too.”

“Is it okay if I...” Tiara quickly glances at Spoon’s dripping sex, aching for her love. Spoon nods and bliss kisses her very soul through her most secret place. It’s not the rabid symphony of blissful slurping she imagined, but Tiara’s touch feels so very delicate and caring, more like a caress than the ravaging she believed she had wanted.

Tiara’s tongue and lips pass over every inch of exposed pink like a purifying sphere of light that shakes her to the core, filling every nerve and every molecule by the tall wonder and joy of the world. She gaps and explodes into a throaty moan when she feels something sliding inside her with all the sweetness of the light of the Sun breaching though one last veil of clouds and sliding against the inside of her love canal.

Coital ecstasy possesses her and the tip of a tremendous orgasm kicks in, so close she can actually grasp it, but gets farther away, just enough to lay at the whims of the magenta colored Goddess inside of her. Tiara’s words about her newfound happiness, about the future that they have ahead and the feeling of being one once again make her folly taste bitter one last time, but the sadness goes away as the wondrous sensation below stops for just a second, just as the space between one’s breaths, and resumes, faster, stronger, better than ever before. She opens her eyelids to see Tiara’s beautiful face mere inches from her, lost in carnal joy just like her, searching for her lips just like her. With massive delight, she feels their marehoods touching and kissing each other, bare flesh against bare flesh, as one pony.

Their clitorises flick and joust against each other, pressing onto each other and driving every base instinct to an alchemic transformation: everything that has driven them, everything they have endured, every happy and sad moment—misunderstandings and jealousy, pain and forgiveness—lead to this perfect moment. Tiara bucks her hips forward and Spoon mirrors the movement, sending each other waves of perfectly symmetrical pleasure, feeling each other’s loins with the sheer power of their love...Until the moment of the truth.

Her heart skips a beat and she feels like floating, literally floating into a perfect heaven, the place where lovers go after such a wonderful act, where even a mere fraction of a second equals to an eternity with one’s special somepony. A place where she finally can’t feel no guilt or shame, because it’s her Tiara that wants her there! Their lips and their sexes are sealed as a promise of eternal love as exhaustion finally takes its toll.

In Diamond Tiara’s embrace she knows she’ll never need more.

They’ll never need more.

The End

Author's Note

So, this journey is over, but it doesn't mean a new one can start. After all is said and done, after reaching tha happy ending that in the end all of us deserve, it's time to make the curtain fall and say my thanks.

To my awesome proofreader and friend, SerenityViewer, that endured my ramblings and helped me grow as a writer, that stood by my side every time I wanted to give up.

To each and every one of my readers that, few as they may be, I treasure all of them for enjoying my stories.

To Lauren Faust for creating this show and for NOT knowing about me, lest she would shoot me in the face with a shotgun.

To AbsoluteAnonymous that even if she doesn't know me or ever will, inspired me in this crazy adventure called 'fanfiction' and still is the best damn writer of all pony fandom.

To the song that started all: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77cFGvF_hms

I hope that we will still be companions in each of my new journeys and, even if there will be only a single person that follows me in the end, it will still be worth it.

See you, Space Cowboy...

Chapter One: What I Lost

More than This

By Damocles23

Chapter 1: What I Lost

Dear Diary,

Today Daddy made me dress like a stupid bunny for that kooky old lady. He said that we owed those bumpkins our family wealth. I know, I know, it’s awful, but I didn’t want to argue with daddy. He always shoots me down if he thinks I’m in the wrong. At least my dearest friendmy best friend my only friend, Spoony, was with me so that’s okay! She even put on one of those silly bunny costumes to make me feel less ridiculous.

I guess she owed me that much. After all, she was the first to start applauding that ridiculous story Granny Smith told us (which I still think it was fake, but nopony listens to me!) but I guess it was nice of her. She’s always at my side even when I’m not an easy pony to deal with. Plus she never complains! Even Daddy came to my room tonight and said that he still loved me, even if sometimes I’m stubborn.
If I have my daddy and Silver Spoon then I don’t need anything else.

Dear Diary

I guess even a rotten apple falls from the tree, sooner or later.

The Three Blank Flanks aren’t Blank Flanks anymore!

Of course the three of them had to have this big, pretentious party at that dusty old farm to celebrate. It’s probably because they couldn’t afford a bigger place and, of course, they had to invite me to rub it in my face.

I think they expected me and Spoony to try to upstage them, just like what happened at my Cutecenera all those years ago. Of course me and Spoon were the better mares, we didn’t give in. We laughed at how we have to be judged for something that happened in our fillyhood. Like time never passed and we never grew up, and I’m still some kind of spoiled, smug, unpleasant little filly.

Like they would know. I’m growing up so fast; daddy can’t believe it! He says that it seemed like only yesterday I finished the sixth grade. He always says at breakfast, ‘Who's this beautiful young mare? My daughter is still a filly.’

I’ve heard that joke so many times, but it never fails to make me laugh. He always says he’s proud of me and couldn’t find better hooves to place the family business in once I’m ready.

When will that happen, it will be the day of reckoning for those former blank flanks…Muahahahaha!
Oh Celestia, I really wrote that? I mean even the evil laugh? Whatever, it’s not like anypony else is going to read this . . .

Dear Diary,

I feel so lonely today, more lonely than I’ve ever been.

Mommy is gone. She left us this morning.

I heard her and Daddy fight more and more over the past few days, but neither of them would tell me anything. I could hear them through the walls. She screamed the other night she said she was ‘tired’ of him and wanted a new life. Away from a little village in the middle of nowhere.

Away from us.

She said he’s distant, even though he’s done everything he could to please her and make her feel loved. She said that he still spoils me, even though it’s just his way of showing that he loves me and wants to see me happy. That’s more than she ever did. She said she could have so much more if she wanted to. I know she couldn’t have more in life if she tried.

How could you be ‘tired’ of him? After all that he gave you? You had everything. He would’ve given you anything you wanted, even if he wasn’t this wealthy . . .

When he saw her leaving (with his carriage, by the way.), I looked into his eyes. He was staring at the carriage, slowly turning into a dot in the distance. Those eyes looked so . . . empty. Like a part of him, the part that held all his love and dedication just . . .left him, leaving only an empty void.

I didn’t dare say anything. I didn’t know the words. He did so much for me and I couldn’t even be at his side in this moment because . . .

What if it’s really my fault like she said?

Silver Spoon passed by once she found out. She tried to console me, but she couldn’t find those damn words either. She only said I shouldn’t feel guilty for what happened. Dear, old, Silver Spoon. If i can’t rely on her when I need it the most, then what do I have?

At least she still cares for me. She always has, ever since i can remember. She never asks for anything in return and always means it.

No matter what happens tomorrow, I hope I never lose my friend.

Dear Diary,

Daddy is weaker by the day. Sadness has somehow consumed him or whatever illness is plaguing him. Nopony wants to tell me about it. Not even him; maybe he thinks that if I don’t know I’ll be less worried about him, but it’s worse like that. So much worse. That proud, fierce stallion has been reduced to a shadow of his former self.

Even if his mane was more silver than brown before that . . . mare . . . left, it was still better than no mane at all. He can’t even talk much these days, except when I sit at his bedside. I keep him company or just read him a story, like he always did to me. Last night he struggled like never before, just to say these words to me: ‘You can have anything you want.’

I want him to feel better. I want it now.

Dear Diary,

Daddy Died.

Rain.

Of all the possible days, they chose this one to make it rain. This is how everything has to end: in the mud.

The rain cuts her to pieces, attacking her rain coat and umbrella. This, combined with the uncaring cold, prevents her from fully hearing the Mayor’s speech, coming only in disjointed fragments. Like an unsubtitled foreign movie, she catches the general meaning but the subtle nuances and allusions are lost.

I can live with that, she reasons. After all, she’s just hearing the same trite, banal things she expected to hear.

A true pillar to our community, she manages to catch between a thunder and another, an example of integrity and character . . . A true model for everypony . . . he will be dearly missed.

Mayor Mare’s voice is so weak, trembling and drowned out by the sharp whistling of the wind, sounding even more insincere and distant to Tiara. She wonders on the little things that have changed around her, seeing the old mayor still in the same old place. He would have had her same age . . .

Nopony is more skilled in stating the obvious than a politician.

Her smirk lasts only for a fleeting moment before it reverts to the same annoyed frown from before. She lifts her head to watch the thick bank of clouds. Tiara takes a step away from under the umbrella she’s sharing with the young mare at her side. A frigid drop stabs her cheek, smearing down the side of her mouth. Is this a terrible nightmare? There’s a a faint glimmer of hope in each cold impact. Maybe the water and frigid sensations will dissolve this deranged fantasy.

Back to a reality where she’ll tell Daddy about this awful dream. He’ll console her and stroke her mane until she falls back asleep, maybe in his lap like he always did to chase away the nightmares.

The rain continues to fall.

That bleak coffin in front of her is very much real. She takes one last look at the sky in spite.

Just for one measly day. Is it too much to ask? Was there is some kind of drought I wasn’t informed of and for this reason we must forsake respect?!

Maybe the rain is a tribute. The skies weep for the loss of such a wonderful stallion, shaping the weather to reflect the loss and mournful aura appropriate for the occasion. Knowing the ponies she has to deal with, these surely aren’t tears, but surely something more appropriate and disgusting . . .

The Mayor’s speech concludes with just a few words she doesn’t quite catch and then comes the moment for another pony to speak. An orange mare takes a step forward and leaves behind the rest of her family, another young mare of her same age and a much taller stallion. The moment she takes that step, a sudden gust of wind flings the rain sideways on everypony’s faces.

Given who’s talking, it’s utterly proper…

The mare clears her throat and starts her string of crap. “Ah didn’t know him very well, but . . .”

Why are you here, then? Next!

“ . . . But ah jus’ wanted to say that without him and mah Granny, nothing would have been the same. There wouldn’t be a Ponyville. Ah think we should be grateful for what he did all these years.”

She remembers the story. With some grudge and respect, she admits that this is the most sensible thing she heard all day. Coming from a country bumpkin, that’s impressive.

“Even if it started with jus’ a business partnership, in his later years our families certainly grew closer . . .”

She steals a glance in front of her to look at the young mare sitting behind the podium. Her eyes are hidden by a crude Stetson, while a red braid at the side of her neck dances in the wind.

She thinks she sees a tear rolling down her cheek, one which the mare wipes off with a sharp movement of her hoof. The cream colored pony notices her and they exchange a brief nod.

Tiara mostly did that out of courtesy. The young mare and her family are the last ponies she wants to see right now.

She doesn’t hear the last part of Applejack’s speech but scoffs anyway. The orange mare steps off the podium, and all eyes turn towards Tiara.

It’s her turn to speak.

She takes a step forward, planting herself right in front of everypony. The young mare that stands at her side gives her the umbrella, leaving herself vulnerable to the rain. They exchange the briefest and most tender of smiles after this.

Turning her face to the rest of the crowd, she sees fewer faces than she expected to see. Faces which aren’t familiar except for a few of his business partners and some of their family members. And, of course, the rotten apples.

That’s it? Are this all the ponies that are gonna miss him?

She lacks the words, she has always lacked the words that be of any comfort to him and now it’s too late. Tiara tries to move her lips but no sound comes from them. In an unexpected stroke of luck, a perfectly timed thunder mutes her words, or the empty sounds coming from her mouth. It also proves to be a good diversion since immediately after a couple of the others, they decide to just haste the whole process, cut off her speech and end this terrible day.

Not that she was paying any attention to it, anyway.

The casket is lowered slowly into the ground and the rain stops the same instant. The crowd disperses without a single word of condolence, mostly because she looks too absorbed in her pain to hear or notice. Which is good, because nopony could possibly console her at this point.

Nopony.

She stands there, caressed by the gentle leftover wind of the now-quelled storm. A tender, yet melancholic, smile appears on her face.

“Goodbye, Daddy. “

She bites her lip, wondering how those raindrops from before are still running down her face, instead of having dried off. “I wish…I wish I could’ve done more for you.” The last drop falls from her cheek and scatters in the wind. “How could you leave me alone?”

“You’re not alone, Tiara…” a quick whisper from her back announces. Tiara yelps, scared.

She whirls to find a presence she couldn’t hear until that moment, but was always at her side this whole, gloomy day: Silver Spoon. Drenched in water, having lent Tiara her umbrella for just a few minutes, she lets out an inelegant sneeze. She’s keeps her head down in a desperate effort to avoid her friend’s eyes, but her few inches of advantage over Tiara makes her look like she’s looking down on her. Spoon starts to play with her long braid, shifting her look between her hair and Tiara.

“You scared me, Spoon…” she turns her back to the grey mare and faces the monument once again with the same scowl. She clears her face off the last salty globs.

“Yeah, sorry about that. Are you okay…?” she leaves her long strand of mane alone, and reaches for the other mare’s shoulder.

“What do you think?” She shifts her weight to the left to avoid the touch, still with her back to Spoon. She doesn’t want to show her red, swollen eyes.

With a look of profound sadness, Spoon tries to babble something. Her voice arrives to the other mare as clear as a whisper. “I know that it’s difficult but…”

“Then, shut up!” Tiara spins around, revealing a sorrowful grimace. Uncontrollable tears are running from her bloodshot eyes. Her shrieking voice is as pleasant as marble sliding against iron. “If you don’t know what to say don’t say anything! You never say anything useful!”

Spoon’s grieving appearance turns into subtle outrage. Her frown mirrors the one in front of her. “Well, sorry if I’m trying to be comprehensive! I just asked if you were okay!” She stomps her hoof on the ground making a splash against the mud.

An exasperated sigh escapes Tiara’s lips. “Geez, Spoon! I thought you were the smart one! What do I need you for if you can’t help me with anything? ” She lunges at her friend, gripping her in a crushing hug. Before Spoon can even begin to look shocked, Tiara breaks down in her chest and covers it in salty tears.

Her howls are muffled by the grey mare’s body, who in turn strokes her mane while keeping her locked in the comforting embrace. Tiara notes with some surprise that her tapered, gentler physique contrasts Spoon’s . . . well, calling it ‘bulky’ would be rude and incorrect, but Spoon is certainly taller than her. It’s strange for her to reflect on something like that now, but at least it’s distracting. The strength and kindness reflected in that embrace remind her of the same qualities she had buried into the earth a few moments ago. She wishes the hug could go on forever.

Her broken sobs are timed with each stroke of her mane and the gentle beating of Spoon’s heart. Her pain fuels her desperate need to be held by somepony, anypony. She sobs even harder, if only to prolong this moment. It comes to the point that she can’t even hear her own wailing, lost in the coat of the only one . . . She’s not sure what but doesn’t care.

She’s there and that’s what matters the most.

She’s quickly brought back to reality by a quick glance over Spoon’s shoulder, where she sees the same yellow mare from before approaching. Her Stetson still covers her eyes. Tiara tears herself from her friend’s clutches and dashes towards the unwelcome presence.

The other young mare doesn’t move a muscle.

“What the hay are you doing here?”, Tiara demands, trying to remain collected. Even though her face is a mess and her approach didn’t look peaceful in the least, she has to appear as the better mare. Even if the one in front of her doesn’t deserve it.

“Ah’ just wanted to pay my respects . . .” the mare answers, pulling more of her hat over her face.

Tiara spins on her heels. "What did you say?!" she demands, grinding her teeth into powder. Her eyes flash with irritation as she stomps over to her foe.

Spoons recoils. Her eyes darts left and right, searching for a refuge. The storm was going to make landfall any minute.

“Ya heard me...”

“Well, you can’t! I’m still here and he’s my father. Mine. Who do you think you are?”

“Ah’ know that.” She raises her Stetson of just a bit, but not enough to meet Tiara’s eyes. “It’s just that . . . Ah’ wanted to see if you were okay.”

“What’s up with everypony tod-” Tiara halts mid-sentence. She realizes with some grudge that the mares question is legitimate. Yet the profound disgust she has for her enemy takes the better of her.

She couldn’t give less of a buck.

“Is everypony dense? How do you think I feel? And why should you care?”

“Because we’re f…”

“Don’t say that word. Don’t you dare. Or at least look me in the eyes if you have to say this load of crap!” She knocks her hat off her head with a weak slap.

The other mare has that same stern look she expected; it’s a look that has come to know and despise so well. This time there’s just a teaspoon of pity: the same she saw in her friend’s eyes. Those eyes keep judging and dissecting her, even now.

Not from you. I will not be pitied by you, too.

“After all we’ve been through, you still think that?”

“Let me think about that. Yes. Yes I do.”

“It always seems we’re still fillies when ah’m talking with you. You’re always stuck in the past.”

“This makes two of us, then.”

“Look, Ah’m sorry about your dad. Ah really am. Ah guess ah’m the last pony that can say that. Mah parents have been gone for so long an’ . . .”

“Then don’t say anything. You’ll look better.” Tiara wears a devious smirk, turning her back again on Bloom. She turns to Spoon with the same grin. She hopes the look will spur her into the same, mocking behavior of days long past.

Spoon only answers with an embarrassed look.

“. . . I almost can’t remember them . . .” Applebloom continues, unfazed. “Ah guess I know how you feel.”

“You don’t know anything about me!” Tiara suddenly turns back to Bloom and glares into her eyes. Her face is so close that the yellow mare takes a step back, away from the flaring breath firing from her nostrils.

“Ah know more about that ya than ya want to admit.” Not only does she not look bothered in the least, but compassion dwells in her eyes again. The same compassion Tiara would rather spit back in her face.

“And ah think your dad would agree with me.”

Before she can even think of being outraged, a spit flies from her mouth and lands with force on the yellow mare’s cheek.

A powerful, tense silence follows, punctuated by Tiara’s frantic breath.

Applebloom stares at her, showing no more expression than a block of granite. She wipes her face clean, turning her back to Tiara and leaving in silence. She never turns once on her slow trot back towards her brother and sister.

Tiara snorts. Utterly ignored even after that.

A look of profound . . . disappointment is etched in Tiara’s eyes as she turns back to Spoon. She collapses once again onto her chest with a loud thud.

Acting on reflex, Spoon starts to caress her mane: “Whatever you need, I’ll be there for you. All right?”

Tiara nods, her chest buried in the thick mud. The swaying vegetation tickles her nose as the wind ripples through the grass all around her.

Laying down on her bed and rolling among the purple sheets many days later, those crude and offensive words still ring in her ears.

Not the words of that conceited smartass of a country hick, no, those words have been tucked away in that corner of her brain labeled “Cowardly Nonsense I Hear Nowadays Vol. II.”
With a sigh she acknowledges that she was, in fact, expecting those words from her.

It still hurt, though, but she’ll never gave her that satisfaction. She has already suffered enough.

No, the words that are bothering her are those underlined on her opened diary: too young. Everything that reminds her of Daddy, everything that could have meant some kind of continuation of everything he believed and excelled at . . . is being stripped from her. Those jackals say she’s still too young and inexperienced to handle the family business on her own.

One of his “friends” had come over. The grin on that old, fat slob as he had explained all the ways he was screwing her over makes her quiver with rage.

She doesn’t feel young. She doesn’t even remember what the word means.

She stopped being young the moment she was left alone by the only two ponies that ever said those three little words: “I love You.”

For once, she has to say the bumpkin was right about something: nothing changed. They still can’t stand each other after all these years and she’s back to square one. Progress canceled, growth halted and just a little filly remains. A lonely little filly that, on top of feeling miserable, has become a shut-in.

She has been pitied enough that day to last a lifetime. She had guessed afterwards that disappearing for a few weeks was the most intelligent thing to do. Wallowing in the so-called “grieving period.”

The only thing keeping her company is her father’s portrait hanging above her bed.

There’s nopony to talk with obviously. If she’s really has stopped acting so young, then she must be an adult now. Sometimes adults have to remain silent.

She stares in those blue eyes made of paint and wonders what he would think of her, seeing his daughter in this pitiful state.

...

She’s quite sure he wouldn’t like to see her like this.

Alone and moping.

She stirs amongst the bedsheets. It would have saddened him, to see his daughter reduced to a corpse. Sad . . . just like his last days. It hurt to know he would have moved earth and sky to comfort his daughter. The least she can do is respect that memory.

After all, his daughter can’t disappoint him like that. Not again.

She unravels herself from the sheets and rises from the bed, looking for a mirror. She flails her arms about, blindly seeking it. The windows are shut and the thin strands of sunlight go anywhere but where she needs it.

She stumbles across the room, almost slipping on the platter on the floor and nearly breaking a leg.

Why didn’t she eat that again? Oh, right, its grass. The taste of everything that grows from earth is like swallowing mouthfuls of ash.

She opens the windows with a sharp movement, letting the warm sunlight reveal a bare, sterile room. Not a speck of dust lies on the floor, nor do clothes hang around in piles like they used to.

No reason to live in a garbage bin. If the maids lacked the courage to enter her room and at least sweep the floor, then she’d have to get her hooves dirty. Never mind how much the thought bothers her.

She has come to despise the dirt these last few weeks. She would scrub the very word if it were possible. Dirt reminds her of a certain day, and the feeling of wet sludge under her hooves. It reminds her of rain, and days long past. Most importantly, it reminds her of her. Being sullied by dirt is for the likes of her.

She has to remain pure, in body and soul.

Speaking of purity, she eyes her bathroom. She slips inside and takes a long, cold shower. She yelps at the cold touch of water but steels herself, loosening her nerves and letting her muscles awaken. She must cleanse herself from all that is old and tedious.

She takes her tiara, her glistening namesake, from the headstand and opens the door, returning to the world.

There is nopony there to greet her. Her hoof steps resound in the empty estate.

Of course . . . Still too early. For those slouches, anyway.

The Sun had risen just a couple of hours ago, after all. It’s earlier than usual for her. The sun hangs low in the sky; it’s the first time in days she’s seen a sunrise.

She heads outside, walking down the long steps in front of her mansion and glances for the carriage parked in front.The stallion that is supposed to pull it is still strapped to the harness, slumbering deeply on all fours.

She approaches him, bothered by his heavy, noticeable snorting. She leans into his ear.

“WAKE UP, YOU BOOB!”

Tiara’s shout is capable of raising the dead. The poor stallion is startled so much that he awakens, screaming and whinnying, and stands on his hind legs as he flays his helpless forelegs in the air. “Who the hay was . . .” he goes silent once he sees the smirking face of Tiara.

“M-Mistress Tiara! G-Good morning! I-I’m sorry...”

“You should be, you’re crude and unpleasant.” She takes a look around, sneering at her surroundings “Just you? Where are the others?”

“Well, nopony showed up yet since yesterday evening, when you . . .” She glares at him with homicidal intent. Her eyes stare mortality and death. There is no mercy in those black marbles.

He gulps. ”I mean when you . . .”

“Continue . . .” she says between her teeth. “When I did what?”

A quivering breath is drawn from the driver. “When you had that disagreement with the servitude...”

The young mare rolls her eyes in response. “And what are you still doing here?”

“I j-just . . . I . . .”

“Just take me into town.” She gets into the carriage, her every movement followed by the stallion’s eyes.

“Next time you want to sleep, just come inside.” She slams the door, busting out in a laughter.

The only good boutique in that dusty old village, and the only mare who knew anything about fashion, were long gone.

Lucky for her, at least.

The fashionista had started a remarkable business over in Canterlot, and one of her department stores had replaced the grand boutique. A chain store where talentless noponys work, but at least she could settle for some pret-à-porter while she’s in town, just to wear something different than black.

She already has an order placed for clothes tailored by the great Rarity, but she’ll have to settle for these in the meantime.

I’m sick of wearing black.

The grieving period finished the precise moment she stepped out the front door, and if anypony has something contradictory to say about it he’s going to be devoured whole. She’s alive and in need of brilliant colors, both garish and lively. Life goes on and is made of all the colors in the world, and the mare in the mirror, clad in her stupefying green gown, certainly agrees. The mirror reflects dignity, class and beauty: everything she has to be.

“So...have you decided then, Miss?” asks the clerk beaming at her from behind the pile of clothes discarded nearby.

“Yes, I have. I’ll take everything!” She turns and takes a look at the dress from her side.

“Wonderful, then! I’ll prepare the bill, or I should I put everything on your account?”

“Sign everything to my account. Also, I’m wearing this...” She points to the dress.

“You look amazing, Miss!”

“I know.”

The bell at the door rings, announcing a new customer. A bluish grey mare enters the shop with a wearied look hidden behind turquoise glasses, and is immediately greeted in silence by the shopkeeper. Tiara eye’s wander over the mare, unaccustomed to recognizing faces after such a long time. She gives her a tentative call.

“Spoony?” Her voice gains a hopeful mien the moment the other mare turns toward her. It is indeed who she hoped it would to be, and her complacent smirk becomes a wide grin of pure joy.

“SPOONY!” Tiara jumps in front of her in her frilly outfit, and grips the mare in a bone-crushing hug. “Oh my gosh, Spoony! I’m so happy to see you! Like, a lot!”

“Tiara?” she squeaks. “ I haven’t seen you since you know...Where have you...?”

“Secluded and depressed. Not much, really.”

And there it is: her friend throws her the same mortified look she has come to know and despise. She only accepts it because it comes from her only friend. “Enough with the gloomy faces, come on! By the way what were you doing here? Were you following me, by chance?”

“Huh...I...” She stops right there, shifting her eyes left and right while biting her lip. Tiara just cocks her eyebrow.

“I’m just joking, Spoon! Sheesh . . . Did you have an order here or something?”

“Yes! Yes, I did!”

“Good. Then it’s on me!” She turns to the clerk. “Be a dear and sign me that, too alright?” The clerk nods and Tiara redirects her attention towards Spoon. “Let’s go outside, shall we?”

Spoon runs ahead of her and holds the door open for Tiara, giving her a gracious bow, which is returned by a lighthearted giggle from Tiara. She’s deeply amused by this gesture, but more so from the fact that it came out of nowhere.

Exiting the boutique, Tiara wraps her foreleg around Spoon’s shoulders, and gives her a quick nip on the cheek. “Good ol’ Spoony. Well not that old! You look good, like a lot! Is it that diet you told me about?”

“You too, Tiara. You look . . .” she risks a glance and eyes Tiara with thirsty eyes, “. . . gorgeous.”

“Aaawww! Thanks, Spoony! You don’t look bad, either.”

“You weren’t busy, were you?”

“Nah, I was just finishing up in there. But you know, I was thinking of going to Canterlot this afternoon to see some real shops.” She gestures to her clothes. “This look is halfway decent.”

“Speaking of Canterlot . . . How about, you know, catching up? Like I said I haven’t seen you in a while and I . . . I missed you.”

“Sounds great, actually. Finally, somepony I’ve been wanting to see after all this time. You have somewhere in mind?”

“Well, there is that club, the one where the Canterlot socia-elite frequent . . .”

“‘Fancy Pants’ club? That one? Whoa, Spoony. You have some expensive tastes,” she snickers.

“Well, yeah. Reservations are, like, a pain. If only we had planned it sooner” she adds with a sigh.

“Spoony . . .” Tiara puts her forehooves around Spoon’s shoulders, struggling a bit to meet her height. “Who am I?”

“Uh . . .” Spoon is at a loss, like a shipwrecked mare on a uninhabited island. “You are, um, Diamond Tiara?”

“That’s right. So leave it in my hooves and just relax because-”

She is interrupted as a round, brown shell smashes into her in the head, and plummets to the ground.

“What the hay?” She massages her injured temple and takes a look around. A squirrel ascends a nearby tree, pausing on a branch and munching on something she can’t recognize. She takes a look around at the ground and sees a nut lying nearby. A quite large one, in fact, lying across from the direction she saw the animal.

“Excuse me for a second...” she says to Spoon. She, very calmly picks up the fruit and aims at the tree, closing an eye and sticking her tongue out in concentration. With a sharp flick of her hoof, she throws the makeshift bullet at one branch in particular.

A blunt noise is heard and a tiny figure plummets to the ground without a sound.

“So...” she returns her attention back to the astonished young mare, “is Nine O’Clock good for you?”

Spoon just chuckles nervously.

Author's Notes: Many thanks to SerenityViewer for helping me proofread this. He rocks!

Chapter 11: Our Peace is Destroyed

More than This

by Damocles23

Chapter 11: Our peace is Destroyed

“Ah still can’t believe you’re doing this.” Applebloom’s hindlegs stand idly in front of a tree, frozen in place.

“Deal with it,” Tiara says as she lifts her rump and clenches her teeth. She flexes her tender muscles and whips them out with a sharp movement, striking the tree bark, and a sharp pain ripples across her hind legs.

“Ouch!”

“Told ya.” Applebloom rolls her eyes with a smarmy grin and effortlessly hits the tree with a powerful, snappy kick. A moment later, a considerable number of apples cascades into a nearby basket.

“I still can’t believe you manage to do it.” Tiara massages her rump with a defeated look. “I mean, I’m an earth pony too.”

“Practice, practice and more practice. Besides there’s earth pony and earth pony.” She gives another blow to the same tree, filling up the basket up to the brim, and moves on to the next. “Still, it’s the thought that counts. Thanks for helping me out.” She smiles at her fillyfriend.

“At least I didn’t waste a hooficure. Hay, I don’t even remember what a hooficure feels like.”

“Ah’m sure that won’t last,” Bloom giggles.

“Well, duh! It’s the first time I’m doing once we get back home. And you’re coming with me, of course.”

“What?” Her pupils shrink with a comical pop.

“You heard me, beautiful. If you want to be with me, we’ll have to work with your appearance.” Tiara leans against a tree with an absent minded look. “I mean, the rustic charm has its, well, charm, but being in a relationship with a mare of my status— Don’t make that face to me. I’m talking about your social survival here!”

“Ya must mean serious business, right?” Bloom’s attempt at sarcasm flies so over Tiara’s head that it leaves a trail of light in the metaphorical sky. In fact, the magenta mare draws closer to the rustic filly with her pupils shot up with indignation and blood. Mostly indignation.

“Of course it is!” she yells, “Just a hair of your mane out of place and bam, you’re going down. They’ll eat you alive— Don't make that look, beautiful: I meant figuratively.”

Blooms sighs in relief and her face regains its healthy colors, still shivering from her own cold sweat. High society, or at least the tales she hears from Rarity and Diamond Tiara, fuels her fear of the pampered dances, hooficures and gossip. She still lacks the courage to ask about half of the things she doesn’t understand; it is a foreign culture that has diverted so much from Equestrian society so as to be unrecognizable. She just smiles and nods most of the time, but not out of lack of respect toward Tiara, of course.

“But you know what?” Tiara gives a wide grin, “I think you and I will be just fine.” The gentle and moving words of the spoiled mare are very inconveniently framed by a thunder in the distance. For a second her vision flashes and she sees a vengeful pair of grey hooves around her neck and her heart skips a beat.

“What’s wrong?” Tiara aks, moving away some locks of her red mane from her forehead.

“N-Nothing. Ah’m just happy to see ya making all these plans for the future and all that.”

Tiara’s smile is in front of her and that is the future in which she wants to believe and rely on. Bloom finds herself in that comforting embrace of hers before she can say a word. “I love you,” she whispers.

“Ah love ya, too.” Their gazes intertwine and their lips quiver, waiting until the moment they’ll be joined together...

Until Bloom breaks the hug in a huff and fakes a smile. “Hi, Sis!” she yells while Tiara jumps away from the yellow mare with fluid grace. She turns away to see, in fact, Applebloom’s sister carrying a cart chock full of apples

“Come on, Applebloom, hurry up to buck those apples. The storm’s coming!” she yells, trying to get her voice over the whistling of the wind.

“Almost finished,sis. Ah just need a couple more.”

“Well, at least ya got help, right?” Applejack gives a playful wink at Tiara, to which she responds with a simple, nervous smile. This worries her a bit, since she normally expects a scathing comment or at least her sticking her tongue out. She's still so unaccustomed to see her playing nice for once. “Jus’ be careful, ya’ll!”

As her sister goes on her way, Bloom sighs and says the obvious: “There’s still your dad.”

“Just a couple of days, AB. You just have to wait.”

Another thunder booms dangerously close.

“I hope we’re finished there.” She shivers a little as the air becomes progressively colder.

“Jus a couple more.” She gives another kick and the tree strips its apples in less than a second. “Ya should’ve stayed inside.”

Somehow, she does not think of these couple of days with Tiara’s as being really just two.

“I wanted to feel useful, you know?” She fidgets a little on her hooves.

Bloom doesn’t know how to answer this. Even though she has all the love in the world for that mare, she still wants to play careful, like standing on a fine line with nothing below to catch her if she falls, if both of them fall. “Ya don’t need to. Ya just need to...be!”

“Just be? The hay does that mean?”

“Be Diamond Tiara. The pony that loves me, the pony that loves her dad, the pony with the colorful insults and the nice little rump.”

“Oh, you rascal!” Tiara giggles and waves her hoof at her with girlish glee.

“Be the pony that ah love even if ya can’t buck a tree to save you’ life and everything will be okay.” She gives her a quick peck on the cheek. “Ah appreciate tha help, tho’.”

“Wow,” Tiara blurts out, frozen in her place, except for a slightly dreamy look.

“Wow what? Was it too corny, maybe?” The fine line on which they walk wobbles and the cold touch of the ground feels closer.

“Yes, it was. You aren’t really aiming high, you know.” She breaks out a nervous giggle. “I mean, all I can do... I wish I could be more.”

“Ah don’t need more.” The giggle collapses into a tearful, sudden and desperate laughter, an almost scary shriek. No, not almost: totally scary.

“Tiara, what’s going on?” She reaches for her and pulls the desperate mare into a close embrace. The cold wind rises once more and the tightrope they tread on wobbles again. The abyss feels colder and closer...

“I’ve do nothing but buck things up and I’m loved for it. It’s just funny.” But Tiara’s laughter is not of the heartfelt kind. It’s every kind but that: a devilish pout-pourry of emotions in the form of a very basic pony emotion. “I love you so much that it hurts. Right there...” She puts a hoof on her chest and makes tiny circles around the heart, “Promise me, Bloom. I don’t want this to end.”

The farmpony babbles incoherently , fear clutching her heart like a steel claw. “Why would this end?”

“It’s too good to be true. For once, everything is going exactly as I want and I don’t have to be mean for it. Just being little, old me.”

“And that’s enough?”

“I hope it is. I hope you were right. I hope we can be three again, one day.”

Bloom’s stare grows vacant as the first raindrops start to tingle on the two mares coats. She strokes Tiara’s mane with tender care, but her mind goes to places she has desperately tried to avoid until now. She was always a pony that moved forward without looking back. A pony that never wanted to lay down and wait for things to work out themselves.

A pony that, even if she has the utmost respect and love for Diamond Tiara, thinks that waiting any longer is a terrible idea. What if her father feels he’s been deceived the whole time, not knowing such a life changing piece of news at the very last moment?

No. Not like that.

Chills crawl up her spine as thousands of raindrops assault the ground below with a vengeance, while thunder roars just above their heads.

“Whoah!” Tiara grips Bloom in a protective embrace, just as the brilliant flash and booming cackle in the sky dies away.

“Ah think you should go inside.”

“Yeah, I think I should.”

Another fleeting kiss and a wink from behind the shoulder, and the mare Bloom loves runs toward the house much faster than she expects. She muses on the fact that she really compensates her lack of brute strength with agility, almost disappearing before she has time to blink. If she wasn’t so spoiled and lazy, she would make good use of that.

But nopony is perfect, she reflects with a simple giggle. A giggle that quickly dies out the moment she realizes what is she going to do behind her lover’s back. One last buck at the tree makes the final apples fall and produce a thumping sound that almost spells out the only things she needs to say:

And

Your

Daughter

Are

Love.

So simple and yet so distant to reach, these are the most difficult words to say in all of Equestria. She has to say them, though. They have to say them. At least she’ll be doing this behind Tiara’s back only to some degree.

As she watches the now completely bare trees, her vision blurs, stained by the merciless rain. She runs and her hoofsteps are masked by those dreadful thunder strikes. So swept she was by Tiara’s plight that she almost forgot that she was hiding this from her siblings as well! Tiara’s playful jab about the Element of Honesty comes to her mind and while it was, of course, playful, it hid a gleam of truth in it: truth is the whole point. Even if it hurts, even if it’s colder than this wind that’s rising over the horizon.

With cat like poise she tiptoes all the way past Tiara’s bedroom and her own, as hears her sister footsteps and the creaking door. Normally she would be the first pony she would confide too, but she decides to put Tiara’s dilemma in front of her own. Applejack’s warmth and kindness would certainly make her understand her reasons and her brother will follow. One of the few things that hasn’t changed is her family, thank Celestia.

Then, before, she can knock on Filthy Rich’s door, that bespectacled, horrifying gleam flashes in again. What if she’s wrong?

If you make her suffer, I’ll kill you.

Silver Spoon’s words hammer her temples and the thought of hurting Tiara hurts even more than whatever that crazy and lovesick pony could. Not that she’s scared of her. What if she ends up being the very thing that Bloom and Tiara fear the most? What if she ends up being the monster that Silver Spoon wants to vanquish at all costs?

It’s too late for that. Far too late: it’s the only reason she has found this resolve. I’m doing this for her. Or am I doing this for me?

No matter what Tiara says, it’s worth it for their love.At least to give them both a chance to bask in the wonderful feeling of love and being loved in return. Everypony deserves at least that, after all, right? The answer doesn’t come...

Bloom timidly knocks at the door and hears the polite voice of Tiara’s father.

“Come in.”

“Um, am ah bothering you?” She leans inside in the oil lamp-lit room in which she sees the mature stallion sitting on a chair with a blanket over his rump and a tiny pair of glasses on his muzzle, reading a book in complete relaxation.

“Of course not, dear.” He closes the book with haste and puts it on his bead nearby. “You must have finished your work at the orchard, I suppose?”

Bloom nods.

“I’m glad, and just when this dreadful storm arrived. Sometimes I wonder how we would live if they weren’t scheduled,” he chuckles.

“Ah guess we’d have a rain of trouble.” She wears a goofy smile while scratching the back of her head while Filthy just chuckles a little more. Thank Celestia her Cutie Mark wasn’t for bad puns.

“That’s true. You wanted to tell me something, dear?” he asks with his usual pleasant behaviour.

That only makes it more difficult to say it.

“Yeah, ah just wanted to ask a couple of things. Ya may have noticed that, um, ya are feelin’ better, right?”

“Of course, Applebloom. I’ll never thank your family enough for the time I’ve spent here. It’s quite a while since I’ve been so peaceful. Especially after those dark days,” he sighs, “I feel so old and useless. I hope my daughter will be alright.”

“Ya know, it’s about your daughter ah wanted to talk.”

“Oh, Celestia. What happened now? You had a fight?” he says with a half-hearted tone

“No, no, no!” She waves her fore hooves in front of her. “Ah mean we are fine together-Ah mean we are together-Ah mean...” She takes a deep, almost painful breath, as if the words are lost in the air she exhales. “We get along well.”

“Phew.” He sighs of relief, “I almost thought you two were back at the old ways. I’m so glad to see her with a friend. She is a grown mare now and she was always, um, difficult to deal with, shall we say.”

“Ta put it mildly.” Bloom rolls her eyes. “No offense, but your daughter was kind of mah worst enemy back in the day.”

“But now it’s not like that anymore,” he wears a warm smile, “isn’t it?”

“Nope, that’s behind us now.” Their first night together flashes before her, clouded in a pleasant and nurturing light. “Far, far behind us.”

“I’m guessing there’s a but in there somewhere, isn’t there?”

“Wel’...A tiny but. Like, really tiny and gorgeous an’...”

She slaps her cheek before Rich’s befuddled gaze confuses her even more. She makes a mental note to slap herself again for that. “We have to tell ya bout somethin’”

“Can I have a clue as to what is this about or I should look forward to the surprise?” he says, nonchalant as he wipes his glasses clean with a blanket.

It’s almost unnerving, how serene he is. Or maybe it’s because Bloom feels so nervous that everypony else looks like the epitome of tranquility compared to her.

“Wel’, I’d prefer for Tiara to be here. It’s very important for her too, and since she’s mah friend...” the taste of that lie becomes more bitter by the minute, “it’s very important fo’ mahself, too. Ah hope ya can understand.”

“Of course. I’m just hoping for some good news for a change. You know, before my time here runs out. I mean our, you know,” he rapidly correct himself, even though the last part flies over the young mare’s head.

“It is, Mr. Rich,” she says with a solemn tone reaching for his shoulder. “Ah guarantee ya that your daughter in in good hooves, that she will never be alone again and after this...” she barely manages to hold back tears of joy, “after this it won’t be tha same!”

“Well, now I’m really curious about this ‘thing.’ But I trust my daughter and I trust you. You know...Tiara has been very distrustful of everypony these days. Especially mares.”

“Really? Why is that?”

“I think she sees her mother in the eyes of every mare she comes across, expect maybe for Spoon and you. I won’t bore you with the details, but it’s not what it seems, even though the two...never got along, to put it mildly.”

“Why is that?” she asks, repressing a hint of sadness in the statement.

Some days, Applebloom would do anything to see the mother that she never knew, while Diamond Tiara always said she would rather forget about her completely.

Cuddling together at night, Tiara whispered between tears how much she would like to trade places with Bloom.

She wipes away a tear that managed to escape before Rich notices it, hoping in the discretion of the darkness.

“I don’t know,” he continues, “but perhaps my condition was the last straw between the two. My wife and my daughter are both difficult to deal with and neither of them reacted the way a normal pony would. Pain changes ponies so much, after all.”

“But, ah don’t want to be disrespectful, wasn’t she the reason you and her... Ah mean she was a-”

“Like I said, it’s much more complicated than that. I’m not ready to tell anypony and I hope I can trust you with this secret. Tiara is not ready, yet.”

Bloom preemptively shuts up, the hated word dissolving in the air before leaving her mouth. Which is good since none of the ponies she knows seems to like it very much anyway.

Bloom just nods, feeling so much disgust over this thread of inevitable lies. Maybe it’s the blood of the Element of Honesty in her veins or maybe it’s just the sheer sadness of a family not able to understand each other anymore, but this sensation is too much for her. Even though her mind would like to return to simpler days, her heart can’t and won’t, not when she has somepony else.

“Ah understand. Mostly.”

“I know it’s not right to make you carry this weight, but you’re a good mare, just like your Granny and your siblings.”

“Ah will, Mister, ah will. Just come see me in a hour or so and ya’ll know everything.”

“When you’re ready, dear. Just don’t worry if I’m late because of these old bones, alright?” He reaches for Bloom and pats her head in a paternal way, with a gentle smile and a chuckle. This gesture of kindness sends her over the edge and she takes leave with just a nod and a nervous smile.

She leans against the door, suffocating an exasperated, long sigh with her hooves, before running them all over her mane. This night is the night all secrets and lies are shattered and laid bare. A thunder strikes a third time, much closer than the last one, and pierces the blackened skies, almost making her yelp like a scared little filly.

She was scared, alright...

Bloom throws herself onto the bed, letting the sweet slumber and darkness envelop her, just to rest her forelegs and cleanse herself of the stress of the day. The dreamless sleeps it’s so deep that it passes in mere seconds for her, and it’s only interrupted by another thunderflash through her window. The brilliant light reveals a silhouette magenta for just a fleeting moment, before it disappears.

She blinks.

“Hi, Bloom,” the figure purrs, her pleasant breath tinging the farm pony’s muzzle with gusto.

“Tiara, ah—”

Her words are swallowed with a kiss that looks more like an assault than a romantic gesture. The spoiled mare’s lips move all along her lover’s muzzle and neck, suffocating them in her typical rough, yet tender, fashion.

“Surprise,” Tiara whispers with an wide smirk before nibbling her ear. Bloom finds herself pinned on the bed under her full weight while the farmpony’s forelegs are locked at her sides by a pair of surprisingly strong ones. “I hope I didn’t scare you.”

“Actually, yes. Ya did. I mean, with tha thunder and all. Did ya do it on purpose?”

“Well, duh!” Tiara says, her grin unchanged.”You always need a good scenery when you want to have sex.”

The mere mention of the word makes Bloom shiver, and Tiara as well, who basks in the simple power of that word.

“Wel’, if ya don’t have scenery, what do ya have instead?”

“Just sex. But you know, there’s just sex and sex.” She shivers again with even more glee, shakes crawling up her spine while her grin turns into a hoarse laugh. “Oh my gosh, I’m, like, terrible.”

“Yes, you are.” She shuts up her the giggling with a kiss, a quick, pleasant kiss that turns into a cascade of them, but strangely lacking passion. Their bodies intertwine, their hooves caressing each other’s withers and flanks.

But Bloom’s mind isn’t there, even when she brushes the interior of Tiara’s cheek with her mouth, drawing out a delightful yelp. Her mind rocks back and forth like a cradle, each movement accompanied by the same litany.

Tell her. Tell her now or it will be too late.

She breaks their kiss, leaving the magenta mare confused and almost...concerned, even.

“What happened?” Tiara asks, almost reflecting in her eyes the same whirlwind of doubts that roars in the farmpony’s brain. “You aren’t in the mood?” she says, lifting herself up with a struggle.

“Nothing,” Bloom quickly says, trotting her way to the window near the bed.

“You liar. I know something is wrong.” She puts a hoof on her shoulder. “You never say no when I jump on you like that.”

“Yeah,” Bloom answers, mesmerized by the tapping of rain on the glass. “That’s true.” It’s the worst possible answer ever and fueled by guilt. With much regret she realizes that Tiara is not fooled in the least.

“Was that about before? I’m much better now, if you’re worried.” She circles Bloom’s shoulders with her forelegs in a tender hug, “Much better now that I can see you again.”

“Ah’m glad.” She grasps Tiara’s hoof with her own. What am I doing to her? The yellow tinted mare turns on herself and meets her lips with Tiara’s own, making both of them relax in the their shared bliss.

There’s still time...

She gently pushes Tiara onto the bed, pausing only to take a breath, massaging each other’s lips until the magenta mare manages to slip her tongue in Bloom’s eager maw. The seconds tick by, with their tongues exploring other’s with voracious need, each warm appendage going crazy and savoring the respective partner’s mouth.

Maybe she won’t be angry if I “soften” her a bit...

With burning intensity and need they explore their bodies with lips, tongues and hooves alike, passing through each and every curve and muscle, coat against coat, almost fused in a single being.

Each stroke is timed with a muffled moan or a desperate giggle, accompanied by the tapping of the rain— the only two noises worth listening to in all of Nature. Her nostrils fill with Tiara’s natural gentle aroma and the few traces of expensive perfume left in her fur, mixed by the familiar scent of grass and rain.

Tiara shivers a bit, desperately grabbing at the farmpony’s whiters while burying her muzzle in the cream colored coat. She throws kisses and nibbles at her neck as she leans closer and closer into Bloom’s ear. The aroma of their marehood’s dripping fills the room, making Bloom’s tights already leak and fuel further her daily need of Diamond Tiara.

Firmly grasping Tiara’s flanks, her mouth along her sensitive chest to nibble and lick to her heart’s content, causing Tiara to let loose those moans. Oh, Celestia, those cute moans of hers, while her body flails and shakes to every whim of Applebloom’s tongue, teases Tiara’s waist with her warm breath as she nears her pink prize between her legs.

The glistening and beautiful prize between Tiara’s legs looks so inviting and juicy, leaving an ever growing trickle of fluid on the bed.

“I bet you love that,” Tiara giggles and pants. “Here, have a better look.” She sprays her legs further, even using a hoof to spread her wet treasure, allowing the world to see her exquisite folds.

Bloom drools and stutters a bit, shades of crimson assaulting her cheeks. “T’s alright...”

“Just alright?” Tiara raises an eyebrow, irritated. “Come on, you can do better.”

“It’s...great?” Bloom gives a sheepish grin, much to Tiara’s escalating annoyance. “Ah mean, fantastic, spectacular, studentuos?”

“It’s stupendous.”

“Yeah, that too! But, ya know...” she purrs, “there’s only one word we need right now. Delicious!”

She lunges toward Tiara’s dripping vagina and her tongue explodes in potent flails, finally tasting the mare.

Tiara’s thighs lock themselves around Bloom’s neck and her hips start to move, bucking against her voracious mouth, much to the farmpony’s delight. Bloom buries her muzzle in Tiara’s privates, in the most intoxicating scent of her arousal.

Bloom’s body shivers and quakes at every lick, tasting the mare she loves and loses herself in the powerful taste. Yet, even if she loves doing this to her, the mere act of pleasuring Diamond Tiara is a reward in itself.

Temptations of pleasuring herself like the first time inches into Bloom’s brain, only to be suffocated by much more primordial sensations, forcing her forehooves to grab Tiara’s hind legs and lift them a bit, uncovering more of that delicious pink flesh. The magenta mare moans and screams of delight as Bloom’s tongue swirls deeper and deeper inside her, grasping at the sheets with animalistic howls. ”Oh, Celestia! I fucking love you, Bloom!”

While the sentiment is sweet, the phrasing wasn’t at all, forcing Applebloom to delve deeper with her tongue and give a sound slap on Tiara’s butt cheek. She lets out another moan of delight that confuses the farm pony into stopping altogether.

“Don't you dare stop!” Tiara screeches. “Slap me again and go on with that pretty mouth of yours-Youch!”

Bloom complies with gusto, feeling the shaking of Tiara’s delicious rump all over her foreleg while her tongue keeps picking at her saccharine juices.

Buried between her haunches, feeling her lover with every sense, every molecule of her body lies in Tiara, for Tiara and because of Tiara. She literally worships her magnificent cunt with every thrust of her tongue down her slick canal and her inner walls, listening to her lovely attentions and eager for more. She delves deeper and deeper, soaking in Tiara’s revelatory moans of approval of where and how to move her tongue.

Her hooves don’t stay idle, though; they explore every inch and curve of her lover’s lower half, brushing against the silken coat of her inner thighs. The curves of her rump, already sore after a couple of slaps or two, burn against her touch. It’s almost like whatever little body fat there is got squished into that cute little butt of hers, the rump that gives Bloom so much trouble.

In fact...

She slips out of Tiara and before the spoiled mare can protest, and spreads her buttcheeks with haste, running her tongue in circles around her delicate anus.

Diamond Tiara almost screams and bites her tongue, her body assaulted by spasms of pleasure in every circle that Bloom runs around her delicate web of nerves.

“It’s dirty,” she lets out with a hint of a laugh. “You’re dirty.” Tiara slams her head into the pillow and relaxes, letting her tongue roll out of her mouth.

Delicious juices rile down her butthole, and Bloom’s lustful licking makes loud slichks and slurps. Another thunder booms outside, but it is obscured by Tiara’s orgasmic shrills.

“Gahhh! I love you, Bloom! I love you so much. I don’t want to ever leave you. I’m sorry for everything bad I sai—”

She bites her lip as the pleasure rocks her nethers and runs down Applebloom’s chin in spurt after spurt, covering her face with love juices. “I love you so much... Promise that you’ll never...You’ll never...”

Her voice stops all of a sudden and her body rests, unmoving.

Bloom lifts her head, leaving a strand of female liquid hanging from her chin, to look into Diamond Tiara’s eyes. She stands frozen, a look of absolute terror and shame etched in her eyes, something she’s never seen before. She looks almost on the verge of tears, staring at nothing, before Applebloom can muster the courage to turn and see what her marefriend is seeing.

She glances towards the door, and sees Tiara’s father, mirroring the same shocked and horrified look on his daughter.

Before he can open his mouth, he collapses to the floor.

I wish she could just slap me and be done with it, she thinks as her sister wraps her in a tight hug.

It’s the same hug she would always give whenever Bloom felt sad as a little filly. The same kindness and comprehension, even though in happier times would have been a gift from the heavens, now seems inappropriate.

“It’s mah fault,” she mutters.

“It’s alright, suga’cube.We’ll figure this out later,” Applejack whispers.

“Ah wanted to tell ya, but---”

“Shhh, Applebloom. Don’ cry.” Her sister tightens the hug and the young mare realizes tears are running down her face. She's not the only one in the room: the pony she loves and hurt is crying her heart out, her face buried beneath her forelegs.

She wishes she could go and comfort her, hold her and tell her that it’s going to be alright, but she has already piled lies upon lies and now it’s too late.

I’ve done enough damage to her. How could I forget? How could I expect it?

For the first time in years, she feels little and vulnerable, wishing for her older brother to be there. He would have something to say: few words, sure, but they would be the right ones. Of all days he had to be in Appleloosa...She feels like a little filly again, yearning for her siblings comfort, the same embrace that would cradle her during the loudest thunderstorms and whisper only sweet nothings. But what would they say, knowing that this is really her fault?

She abandons her sister’s undeserved embrace, not an easy task, and reaches for Tiara’s side, putting a loving foreleg around the shoulders of the crying pony. “Oh, Tiara. Ah’m so sor-”

“How could this happens?” Tiara says between broken sobs. “Why now? Of all moments why now? The worst possible moment...” She sulks again into a crying fit, hiding her face from the rest of the world.

“Ah don’t know.” The lies taste like poison now. Poison for the soul that she deserves to taste. “Maybe it’s jus’ nothin’.”

“Bloom, I love you, but please shut up. You can’t say anything until the doctor says something.”

“How could ya?” Bloom’s heart stops when she hears her sister’s voice, but the words are directed to Tiara, accompanied with a glare from vengeful eyes. The young mare returns the glare with no hesitation, finding more than a match.

“Pardon?” Tiara brings out a forced smirk, the smirk of a pony that perfectly heard her, but just wishes to mock. A smirk that hides venomous rage behind it.

“How could ya do this to your own father? And Applebloom too?!, she screams with anger, almost kicking the table in the way.

“Don’t you dare!” she lashes out at the orange mare, “Don’t you dare make me the bad guy. I didn’t do anything wrong. We didn’t do anything wrong.”

“The nerve of ya,” she spits out, “Ah bet it was you, t’ always ya! Ah bet it was all your idea. Ah bet it was you that took advantage of mah little sister.”

“I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell all of you, but...but it never was the right moment until that happened. There’s nopony to blame. Besides, why is your little sister not getting a lecture?”

“It’s because of you. You coerced her into this and-and...It’s your fault!”

“Applejack, stop!” Bloom launches herself in between the two snarling mares, “She didn’t coer...coex...Ah wanted it! And she wanted it, too. Ah-Ah love her.”

The fury in both Tiara and Applejack’s eyes quells for a moment as her sister strokes her cheek. “Oh, Applebloom...Is that true?”

“It is.” The truth hurts, this one in particular. For once, she regards it as the poorest excuse ever, given what just happened.

“Well...” she rubs the bridge of her nose with an annoyed grunt, “we’ll think about it later. After the doctor tells us somethin’.”

“You know, if there’s somepony that should be worrying right now, it’s moi! Why do you care?”

The words fly out and Bloom wishes she can shove them back down Tiara’s throat; the embarrassment is enough to make her want to slap herself silly. And maybe slap Tiara, too. For a second, she can almost see that unpleasant little filly of days long past in her house.

“At least somepony’s got to do it. Ya seem like ya don’t care, you little sniveling b-”

“Applejack!” Bloom screams in terror, severing the word that she hopes her sister didn’t just try to utter before something horrible happens.

“No, no, Bloom. Let her finish. I want to see if she has the guts to say it. You know that you have no chances with him, right?”

“Now, jus’ what are ya trying ta say?” Applejack’s voice lowers to almost a growl, her green eyes twinkling like the twirl of a knife under her hat.

“You have no business with my family. And even if you did you’re so below him you don’t even deserve him! You don’t need to fake some sympathy just to get into his bed—”

A powerful slap hits her across the face and flings the mare to the other side of the room.

Bloom screams, but no sound comes from her mouth.

Tiara hits the wall with a side and and a trail of blood riles down her chin, which she wipes away in a instant.

“It all comes down to this with ya, doesn’t it?” The mare’s lower lip faintly trembles, as does her voice. “Jus’ ta only thing ya can think of...Like there’s no middle ground.”

Diamond Tiara runs outside, without warning, leaving a gust of cold wind to enter the room, as cold as the stare she gave to the farmponies.

“Tiara, wait!” Bloom runs toward her, but feels a familiar grip on her coat. Applejack tries to stop her, to say something, but for the first time she doesn’t want to listen. She isn’t saddened or angry with her sister, but something between them can’t ever be the same again. “Please let me go to her,” she pleads with quivering eyes.

The hoof removes itself, and lowers a stetson upon Applejack’s eyes.

“Ah’m so sorry. I failed ya both...” Applejack whispers, before the proud and angry farmpony dissolves into tears.

The cold rain and wind stings her eyes while the thunder falls all around her. A scream is heard between the sound of the storm in the tune of Tiara’s voice. She finds her lover in the muddy fields, her mane wet and disheveled and her coat as dirty as ever, screaming and crying her heart out at the uncaring sky: a horrifying and pathetic image that is a far cry from the elegant and composed mare she came to know.

All of her sorrow exploded on this dreadful day, beaten and kneeled by the awful circumstances... and by Bloom’s mistakes. “How could this have happened?!”

She runs to her side in the slime and in the mud, hugging her so hard that she can feel Tiara shaking to her very core, her heartbeat slamming against her ribcage. She doesn’t deserve to talk to her, let alone touch her this way.

“Everything will be alright.” She closes her eyes and only Tiara’s sobbing and the thunder remains.

“It won’t be. I’ve done it, I’ve finally done it! I hurt my father more than I ever did! We were right: the truth would have destroyed me, but seeing me like t-that...” She circles her own chest with her forelegs and makes another painful sound. “I feel so dirty.”

“It’s mah fault. Ah thought there was still time. A-Ah didn’t mean to...” A voice inside Applebloom screams to tell Tiara the truth: her father was there because of one of her crazy schemes. They’ve slept together without a care in the world, completely forgetting about him. Bloom forgot about him because she had been careless, for Celestia’s sake! She let her guard down and disaster had struck.

“I was asking for it, actually. Maybe your sister is right: I-I Just have one thing in mind.” She slumps down against Applebloom’s chest like she would to a brick wall, staring at nothing with vacant eyes.

“Maybe it was all wrong. Everything about us was wrong.” The horrible truth comes out between raucous sobs. Diamond Tiara stops moving and shaking in Bloom’s grip.

“Never say that again,” she calmly says. Much more calmer than the mare who cried for her father just a minute ago. The uneasy kind of calm.

“Yes, it’s true. Ah messed up everything an—”

She’s shoved into the mud by a crazy gleam framed between dirty locks of mane and pinned to the ground by pinkish hoof.

“Never say that again!” Tiara screams, teeth grinding and tears flowing, her once cute face deformed by the lightning in a desperate scowl. ”You said that everything is alright, right?”

“Well, ah said it, but—”

“I still got you. I’ll always have you. Always. I love you.” Her voice cracks, but before Bloom can do anything or say anything to comfort her, her lips force themselves onto Tiara’s with all the tenderness of steel grazing rock.

There’s no passion, no love in that kiss, only pain and cold need. The kiss breaks countless times, just enough to let them breath the bare minimum to survive.

“I love you, loveyouloveyouloveyou....” she repeats as a mantra while coating the mud covered muzzle of Applebloom in slobbering and completely careless kisses. None of this is earned, none of this gives solace to the farmpony’s heart, none of them is...

Nothing. She really doesn’t deserve it.

Tiara's lips are stopped by a sturdy hoof and a pair of pleading amber eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Tiara blurts out in broken sobs, her elegant features covered by tears and mud.

“This. This is wrong.” Bloom is immediately slapped by the mare above her, but the pain doesn’t registered. “It’s all mah fault.”

“Your fault for what?! What have you done?” the mare screams in anger, grinding her teeth.

A shocking suggestion passes through her mind, fueled by the most negative feelings she has ever had the displeasure to find: cowardice, sadness...and love. For the love of that mare that is suffering so much, she now has to relinquish it.

To end it, once and for all.

How could she ever look in Tiara eyes again, knowing that she’s involved in all of this? How could she ever think to kiss those lips again if those same lips brought her peace to an abrupt end?

“Ah’m sorry for having to fall in love with the likes of ya!”

The sky itself tears apart with a vicious thunder, and rips the cloud bank in two for its sheer force. The heart of two ponies breaks in half in the exact same moment.

Tiara recoils back, in shock and despair. “W-what do you mean? What does that mean?”

“That it’s over!” She shoves Tiara away, tossing the mare’s rump into a puddle of mud, splashing vigorously even with such a slender body. “We couldn’t do it. It just can’t work!”

“Who said it can’t?” Tiara lifts herself, her coat and mane stained beyond repair, but for the first time uncaring of it.

“How could ah ever face your dad after what jus’ happ’ned? How could ah face ya about it?”

“I don’t care. We’ll find a way, he’ll get better and I’ll say how sorry we are and we’re going to be happy together and-and-a-a-a-a...”, the magenta mare descends into a manic, almost desperate giggle drowned in tears of regret. What little is left of her composure melts away in front of Bloom’s eyes. It becomes more difficult by the minute, but she swears to herself this is the last time she will ever hurt Tiara.

“It can’t be done, Tiara. Ah’ve ruined your life. All of your plans, all of my plans...Gone. Because we were wrong from the start.” The rain washes away her tears before anypony has a chance to see them. The dreadful storm cancels the traces of her guilt forever.

“You didn’t ruin anything , Bloom. It’s not your fault. Ever since we got together I couldn’t be happier. I was alone, all alone until you got into my life, just because of the mistakes of a little, dumb filly. I was too lazy to move away from that village and nopony there, not one of the foals and fillies I grew up with could look at me with something other than contempt. I never grew up because they didn’t give me the chance!”

“Ah know...” Bloom’s mane falls limp and wet in front of her eyes. Her ribbon falls to the ground covered in mud, like the last shreds of days long past when she and Tiara didn’t share, but disliked each other. Days that rear their ugly head, reflected in the storm...Days that she knows will live again after this.

“Except you! I was even willing to forgive Mom for breaking my dad’s heart, because If that didn’t happen I wouldn’t have met you. And I don’t mean the lame, do-gooder blank flank, but the real you, that saw something more than the little bitch I used to be. Somepony that saw the real Diamond Tiara and even fell in love with her.”

The words cut deep, marking something the farmpony will never forgive herself for. For having done this to the one pony that needed her love and it was thrown back to her face. She knows that she doesn’t deserve her anymore and her kind words are lost in the wind. “Ah’m sorry, then. Ah’m sorry If ah hurt that wonderful mare.”

“You see? Nopony has ever called me like that. And I never loved somepony as much as I love you. “

“Think, Tiara!” Bloom wants to hurt her more, to make her go away for her lover’s sake, but she still wants to plead, to reason with her. She clings to this tiny hope, but she knows kind words will never reach Tiara. “What can I give ya but pain and embarrassment? What will ya say to your dad? Do ya still want to make him suffer? Do you want to suffer? Why, even if you love me-”

“I do love you!”

“Why are ya willing to do this to yourself? Just for a mare that just ruined everything?”

“Because if something were to happen to daddy...Nopony in the world would love me, except for you. And I wouldn’t want anypony else to love, but you. ”

There are few moments in life that two different outcomes can change a life, if not more, forever. She sees a faint hope of staying at Tiara’s side, a glimmer of hope to work out this horrible night out, a last chance to be happy and not let guilt and sadness cancel the beautiful days she passed her with her first love.

It’s just a lie, of course: a beautiful lie she doesn’t deserve anymore. Reality strikes like the final lightning above them. Everything ends with this sound and Applebloom knows it.

“So, please...I’m begging you...”

For the first time in her life, Tiara kneels, so low that her forehead almost touches the slime. “Don’t leave me alone now. Not now. ” She lifts her head to reveal a pair of hurtful eyes, eyes that scream the only thing that Bloom begs silently to her love to never say.

“I need you,” Tiara says softly.

The farmpony turns her back to her to hide her tears and trots away in the darkness.

“You need better, then...”

She’ll hate herself forever for this and she knows it, but, somehow, the strength she’s always had finally runs out. Not even a glimmer of courage to say the truth to her.

“I NEED YOU!” Diamond Tiara screams again, alone in the cold, like she was once again condemned by the action of a little, dumb filly. A grown up, a real mare would run to her and tell the truth, but she’s not one yet. Nothing has changed but her height...The only thing the little dumb filly can do is steel herself to not hear those desperate pleads.

“I need you, please! Don’t leave me like that! You can’t do this to me! You can’t! YOU CAN’T!”, Tiara snarls, her voice shrieking so much that it almost rips itself apart before a desperate wailing replaces words. Every sob is a stab, a kick, a drop of poison, but she can’t go back now.

She has just left alone the only pony she has ever loved in her moment of need. She hopes that, one day, the pain she has brought her, the memory of the love they have lost will just become something to forget, something that Tiara will write in her diary so that her memory won’t contain it.

Just drops of ink that will never hurt her again...