Grief.

I hear her still.

I wish she was here.

A decade? Is that right? Gone by already?

And another, passed me by like...

... like...

I think about you every day.

The years keep trickling past, sand through my feathers.

It takes forever just to...

talk

to you.

Fifty passed already, gone in a blink.

The crown's burden is strenuous.

Strenuous.

Heavy is my head.

My—

Our.

Subjects.

They love me, like they always have.

Like they never loved you.

I'm sorry. It wasn't your fault. All I have left are regrets.

Regrets, and empty memories of your smile.

It's been a hundred years. They continue to fly by.

Every soul you knew is dead.

Few that they are, anyway.

Were.

You'll be happy to know that I met somepony.

Last year.

A charming stallion unlike the rest, who has swept me off my hooves.

We're happy together.

But, with how fast the years go, I'm scared.

All I can think of is you.

I can't waste the time.

Onyx Marble. That's his name. I love him.

I miss you daily.

Agonizing.

It's agonizing.

Every message I write in this dusty little diary. Every word takes far too long. Too much.

Too much.

I'm powerful. You know this. Still, I can only just

barely

talk to you.

I'm sorry, sister. You deserved better.

Deserve. Better.

It must be awfully dull up there, huh?

Or maybe the time is passing even faster for you?

I hope so.

Hope.

Gone.

My only child followed his father.

They both lie in the dirt, now.

You mustn't worry about me. I'm not as lonely as you.

I have grandchildren. It's a joy to watch them grow.

They keep me company as I rule. They love me even more than my subjects.

They grow old, now. Fifty years after the death of their father.

Sixty, now.

They're almost as wise as I, and their children are shaping up well.

Luna, I...

I must apologize.

I've been squandering my time and ability to talk to you.

I just spent seventy-seven years telling you about grandkids you'll never see.

What do you care about my descendants? By the time you return, none will be left.

I should be spending this time better. I should be telling you how loved you are. How I miss you still.

Our subjects are beginning to worry.

Four hundred...

Every year, on the summer solstice, I go out and raise the sun personally, basking in its rays.

I channel its power.

it's how I speak to you. Every year, I can write one word.

They've turned it into a whole celebration.

The "Summer Sun Celebration".

For me, though, it's always been about you.

Nopony else.

It's a struggle to plan what to say.

I can't find the words I need.

Express.

I want to express myself.

I need to be better.

My messages should be used for better things.

Love.

I love you, Luna.

Hope.

Faith.

Sadness.

Light.

Five Hundred

Love.

Friendship.

Joy in pain.

Optimism in sorrow.

I've learned a new word:

Sehnsucht.

The Griffon ambassador taught it to me.

Things have changed, Luna.

The world is different.

More peaceful.

Halfway there, now. I can't imagine waiting all this time again.

We'll have to make due.

I've built a new castle.

Things are changing so much, Equestria needed a new base of operations.

I didn't want to stay in the Everfree.

Sorry.

Canterlot is our new capitol.

It's built on that mountain you used to make fun of.

You know the one.

I imagine you'll give me an earful

Six Hundred

about it when you get back.

My lineage has lasted much longer than expected.

I never remarried, nor took interest in anypony else.

Onyx's death was too painful.

They've kept themselves 'pure', separated from everypony else.

It's saddening, really.

I had to visit and cure some deformities from the shallow gene pool.

I expect this won't be the only time.

Oh, Luna. These descendants of mine are prideful.

I love them still. How could I not?

They're the only family I have, with you gone.

I miss you every day, still. The memories are fresh as the regret.

Seven Hundred

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

It's a lovely word.

The Griffon who taught it to me died long ago.

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

It's not just you I long for, now.

You're special, though. You'll return to me. I just have to wait another...

... two-hundred and sixty years.

It's so lonely, Luna.

My husband, children, advisors, friends...

All dead. All gone.

I miss them.

I miss you.

I wish you were here.

The years feel so long.

How can an immortal like me feel so aged?

I've changed, Luna.

My pink mane has turned prismatic. I've shot up in height.

Eight Hundred

That all happened centuries ago. I only told you now because there's nothing left to tell.

I love you, Luna.

Sehnsucht

It feels like there's nothing to do but wait until you come back.

What do I say?

Even after all this time, I can't find the perfect word.

All I have is...

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

I'm weary.

I'm so tired.

Can you even hear me?

It won't be much longer, now. That thought keeps me going.

I've found myself reading the words in this diary over and

over.

Knowing you have a copy.

It's how I sleep.

One Hundred

Nine hundred years gone.

Have my ramblings helped?

Have you heard me through all this time?

Will it be worth it?

I think so.

I know so.

I have begun making preparations for your arrival.

You'll be disappointed to know that I'm not worthy of wielding the Elements anymore.

Sorry.

I'm trying to find the parents of the new Bearers.

This wonderful filly is my new student! Sunset. She'll be old when you come, but hopefully—

Grief.

Twilight Sparkle. She's the one. She won't leave me.

I can feel the stars aligning.

I can't wait to see you.

I love you.

Author's Note

Frantic, Celestia ran to her purified sister and swept her up in a crushing embrace, ignoring everything else.

Tears poured out of both sisters' faces as they clutched each other.

"Did you hear them? My messages?" Celestia whispered.

Sniffling, Luna nodded.

"Every word. Every year."