There is a Problem with your Resume...
Twilight Sparkle was sitting in the waiting room outside of Mayor Mare’s office inside of town hall. She was a little nervous but was also very confident in her qualifications for the job that she was applying for. She had already unofficially been working the job for a couple of months now.
When it was time, she was called in. “Ms. Sparkle… the mayor will see you now.”
Walking into the office, she shook hooves with the mayor and sat down.
Mayor Mare smiled at her. “I’d like to thank you for applying for the open full-time Librarian position here in Ponyville. I understand that as Princess Celestia’s personal student, you were allowed to live in the library as part of your assignment to finish preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration… and as your assignment shifted to studying the magic of friendship… that you have continued to stay in the library. You’ve been effectively working there for free this whole time but now you’re formally applying for the job?”
Twilight nodded. “I do get a royal stipend from being the personal student of the Princess but it’s not that large. I would be more comfortable with a real job and earning my own money, separate from the stipend. I would like to say that I’ve had no complaints about my work at the library since I took it over and since I live there anyways… it seems like it would be a good fit for both me and the town.”
Mayor Mare nodded solemnly. “What you have said is true… there have been no complaints about your work at the library… but I’m afraid to say that you simply aren’t qualified for the job…”
Twilight raised her voice. “Not qualified? How am I not qualified!?”
Mayor Mare looked stern. “Your resume is either incomplete or has been falsified. I’m afraid that I can’t hire you for pay using taxpayer funds under the circumstances.”
Twilight gasped. “What are you talking about? I haven’t lied about anything on my resume.”
Mayor Mare sighed. “Simply put, librarians typically need a bachelor’s degree in library science or some other higher education as an Archivist or as a professional researcher. While I respect your position as Princess Celestia’s personal student... you haven’t even graduated from Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. When I contacted the school about you… they told me that your degree program is ‘unlisted’ or ‘undecided’ and while I realize that you were on summer break when the Princess sent you to Ponyville… you are officially listed as ‘On Hiatus, Graduation Date Unknown’. Without a college degree of any kind… I can’t allow you to hold the position of town librarian. I’m sorry, Twilight.”
Twilight’s mouth hung open in shock. The explanation made sense, but it also sounded so wrong.
“How can I fix this? What do I need to do?”
Mayor Mare shrugged. “I’m not sure. Maybe your lack of graduation is in error? Write to the Princess? I can give you the job with a royal decree but short of the decree or a finished education… my hooves are tied.”
Twilight thanked the mayor for her time and rushed back to the library.
“Spike! I need to write a letter to the Princess, now!”
Spike got a quill and parchment out and stood ready.
‘Dear Princess Celestia,
I applied for the job of Ponyville Town Librarian and was rejected because apparently, I never officially graduated from your school. Ponyville doesn’t have a college or university that I could transfer to and since all the elements of harmony are in Ponyville… I can’t exactly attend classes in-pony anywhere else. Can you give me a royal certificate allowing me to obtain the job officially or am I missing something?
What am I supposed to do?
Your most faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle’
* * *
Princess Celestia was enjoying her afternoon tea when she got Twilight’s latest letter. Reading it, she let out a sigh. Writing the reply was one of the hardest things she had to do recently but it was necessary because Twilight was more than just a little naïve.
‘My most faithful student,
The mayor is correct.
You didn’t finish your education and you are no longer in position to continue in-pony. I never held back your potential but that also meant that I never limited what classes you could or could not take. To a certain extent, I was allowing you to pick your own classes hoping you would settle on a major instead of taking classes purely for knowledge’s sake. Most ponies seemed to know what classes they needed to finish a program, but not you, it seems.
You have attended my school for 9 years and despite taking a max load of 6 classes per semester for 18 semesters… you didn’t manage to complete a single degree. At an average of 3 hours per class… 18 hours per semester… you might be the only pony in the history of Equestria to earn 324 college credits and not even ‘accidently’ earn a degree.
I wish I could help you but giving you a royal decree to be allowed to work at the library for pay would be considered favoritism. Your college credits from my school will transfer anywhere in Equestria so I would suggest looking at a correspondence college where you could take classes and submit homework through the mail. I will issue a decree that allows you to live at the library even if another librarian is hired. I’m afraid that is the best I can do.
Yours sincerely,
Princess Celestia’
* * *
Twilight raged at the reply. For all the hard work she had done… she was considered uneducated on paper. Her parents would be ashamed. Her brother would laugh at her. She didn’t know of any correspondence colleges worth transferring to.
Spike asked her a question. “What are you going to do?”
Twilight replied. “I’m going to get drunk. Join me?”
Spike shrugged. "Don't mind if I do, Twilight."
* * *
