In Search Of Meaning

by ARandomLonelyDude

Chapter 1: "There might be no purpose to it all..."

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Ever since Luna had returned from the moon, she had been feeling an emptiness inside her. Sure, she was reunited with her magnificient sister, the people accepted her and her night, and she had a lot more ponies who loved the night, but it all felt... hollow to her.

She didn't have a lot to do most of the days except for getting educated on the modern world and language, but that wasn't enough to keep her mind off the emptiness she felt. She had tried a variety of things to get rid of the emptiness, from trying to make friends to buying a plushie, but none of it had worked.

She still felt empty and on some days, she found herself stuck in bed, asking herself why she should get up. There wasn't much for her to do anyway. Her sister managed the country quite effectively and there were rarely any ponies whose dreams needed to attended to. She only had the moon to raise but Celestia could do that as well, and that knowledge made her feel... redundant. Unneeded, even.

She hated how she felt. She wanted meaning.


The parks of Canterlot were always a nice place to go to at night. Luna hadn't brought any escorts with her as she wanted to be alone.

She sat on a park bench under a yellow light. The cool breeze was the only thing accompanying her for a while, and in that time, she had thought about some things. Mainly, night court and how nobody had come for it.

It wasn't out of fear or malice, it was just that all the matters that needed resolving in the royal court were resolved during the day, leaving nothing over for the night. Luna knew that very well but she couldn't help but feel jealo– bad. She felt bad and not that, she kept telling herself. After all, she had everything she could want: acceptance and love and...

She sighed to herself, laying down on the bench as she remembered that she lacked meaning.

Through her education and daily life, she had noticed that there was nothing she had to, or could, do for anypony around her. It felt wrong since she had taken up the mantle of ruler of Equestria to serve its people, to work, to help, but all she could do right now was just exist and watch. Her sister did all of that and more, and she did it with grace and elegance.

One of Luna's many flaws was that she was rather unyielding for a ruler, never accepting compromise nor ever engaging in diplomacy that wasn't a show of force. It was alright back then, when the world was still untamed and the maps still had 'here be windigos' on them, but in the current era of peace where conflict was but a distant memory, it was a glaring flaw.

Her terrible power was rather useless, but it was all she had right now. She couldn't do much to help her sister, not without getting in the way or just becoming accessory to whatever was being done. She couldn't try and engage in mortal pleasures like finding love or making friends since her immortality made it hard to get close to anyone. She couldn't try engaging in other pursuits or hobbies as well.

It was a hopeless situation for her, knowing she served no purpose. She felt like giving up.

However, before her thoughts could start taking her towards darker places, the sound of footsteps came from down the path. Luna quickly sat upright, her sorrows mostly forgotten as she waited with bated breath for whoever was coming towards her.

The creature she saw was peculiar. The creature, a male she guessed, stood on two legs and walked with a confident gait. He wore a dark cloth around his waist that reached down to his feet, which were bare. He didnt wear anything on his torso, letting his potbelly in full view of the world. Not just his potbelly though; his strong arm were in full view as well. His face was flat and a large moustache was the most prominent thing on it. On his head, he wore a golden helmet with horns jutting out of it. In one of his hands was a golden blunt mace that seemed far too impractical to be real.

Luna would have dismissed the creature as a minotaur hybrid with peculiar looks, a performer of some sorts, but the sheer power he exuded didn't let her. He was covered, nay, he was made out of powerful magic. Magic that was older than her, stronger than her — magic that was primordial; divine, even.

Needless to say, Luna was caught staring slack-jawed at the man.

The man saw her as well and he laughed. It wasn't laced with any malice; it was genuine amusement at how confused the princess was.

"Who are you?" Luna managed to ask, making the man stop laughing. She should have asked 'what are you' but for some reason, she just didn't. Not that she could care right now, she just wanted to know who the stanger was.

"Who am I?" he asked rhetorically in a deep voice — the kind that Luna expected to hear from an uncle, which was weird since she never had one. He put up his free hand to his chin, and stroked it as he answered, "I have many names, princess. Yama, Kala, Dharmraj, and many more."

He stopped stroking his chin, and twirled his moustache as he continued with a smirk, "But you may call me Yamaraj."

"Why are you here, Yamaraj?" Luna asked, still not able to ask him what he was.

"Oh, me? I'm on a little break from my job, collecting and judging souls can be tiresome at times," he said, ending with a chuckle.

"What?" Luna was sure she had misheard him somehow. Even for his immense power, she could not believe that he was suggesting he was a god of death. "Did I hear you–"

"Yes, you heard me correctly," he said, almost chuckling again. "How about I ask you a question, princess?"

Luna couldn't answer immediately as Yamaraj took a seat next to her, making the bench creak a little under his weight. Once he was settled, Luna asked, "What do you want... to ask?"

"I couldn't help but notice that a long-lived being such as yourself was going through trouble. Maybe you could tell me about it," he said with a smile. "I only wish to help."

"My... troubles?"

Luna just knew that he was talking about how she felt. The thing was that she had told nobody about how she had been feeling. Maybe Yamaraj was actually what he suggested he was. She suddenly felt a lot smaller in front of him, and more compelled to do what he said.

"I– What is the meaning of it all?"

It was a bold way to start, asking death what the meaning of life was. Yamaraj found the irony to be funny, evident by his laughter. He didn't laugh for long though. "Could you be more specific?"

"I... don't serve any real purpose besides raising the moon, but even my sister can do that, and... the lack of meaning troubles me," she confided.

Yamaraj hummed. "You serve no purpose?"

Luna nodded.

"You are wrong in that assumption."

Luna turned her head to face him. He had a smile on his face. "What do you mean by that? You probably know how I am a stranger to this world, without any work or task. How could you say that then?"

"Well, I can tell you this: everything has a purpose," Yamaraj began. "And it is up to you to decide what that purpose will be. I've seen quite a many like you, foolishly asking themselves what they were made for instead of working to find it. There might be no purpose to it all at frst glance, but we always have a purpose — we just have to see it.

Take yourself for example. You want to serve your people but you think you are not. In reality, you are–"

"I'm doing the bare minimum."

"But you're still doing something. Your people have you to thank for their night, and to look up to for guidance."

"I should be doing more."

"You will say the same thing if you replace your sister some day."

"What do you mean by that?"

"You can contribute, even if it is only a little, and you should take pride in that. There have been many who thought that they didn't do enough — didn't take any pride in their work nor acknowledged its importance — and decided to simply not do anything at all as a result, and I can sense that you're close to that point as well."

Luna didn't say anything and turned away in shame. Was that what she was doing? Being useless by choice because she couldn't see the little things? If she was doing that then how could she think of herself as a competent rule–

"But do not despair — you have all the time in the world to sort your problems out."

Yamaraj got up from his seat, stretching his back a bit. "I'll see you again one day, princess. Remember to cherish the small things like they are the big things, and your problem will be solved."

He was gone before Luna could say anything — even a goodbye.

However, his words stayed, and they had given her something to think about. She had plenty of time like he had said, and she did contribute in small ways. They were small, but they were still real. At least, she wasn't doing anything evil.

She got up from the bench and went on her path back to the castle, not as sad as she was before. She had a new way to look at things. Maybe things would be alright for her.


Author's Note

Went with an asian mythological person this time instead of european. more info on him here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yama

I might do something more, maybe. but i should take pride in what i've done as well:trollestia: