Letting Go

by Midnight Lancer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, Sad, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1367

Saying goodbye always hurts, doubly so when they can't say it back.

Midnight Lancer has lost part of his family. The toll taken on the stallion is heavy, with him isolating and blaming himself for her passing. Unable to handle his thoughts, he goes for a flight towards the rocky cliffs north of Manehattan to finally say goodbye.

This is a personal story to help me process the loss of a cherished pet. It's not meant to be anything crazy, but I did try hard while writing this. If you have any feedback, please leave a comment below so that I may improve. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I love you, Mimi.

Published 2024-07-22 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-07-22 00:00:00 UTC

Saying Goodbye

It was cold.

Of course, this was to be expected. Up so high above the world, water droplets froze into fragile little crystals and the wind fell well below anything considered comfortable. Time seemed to slow to a crawl as the sounds of the world faded away, leaving only the whistling of air and flapping of wings to break the silence.

For Midnight Lancer, this was nothing special.

The jet black stallion sighed as his eyes trailed down towards Faust below, watching avenues and boroughs slowly trail away into rolling hills as he flew further north, leaving Manehattan behind him.

His saddlebags softly bounced against his frame every time the pegasus beat his wings, their leathery skin rubbing into his flanks incessantly. It didn't help that they were heavier than normal this time, forcing Midnight to put more work than usual into his flight. Still, he pressed on mostly unfazed, too distracted with the scenery below for him to care.

Manehattan would eventually secede from view, those rolling hills and the occasional forest now being all the pegasus could see below him. The greenery was a nice change for Midnight, all too used to seeing the concrete and brick jungle that was his city on a daily basis. Out here, there was actually space to breathe, time to think.

Out here, it was peaceful.

Turning his gaze back up towards the sky and his flight path, Midnight spotted a soft, grey cloud floating just ahead. It lazily floated along without a care in the world, its fluffy surface practically begging the stallion to take a rest.

Rolling around the cloud with little effort, Midnight frowned as the horizon was quickly filling with similar grey masses. Accompanying the slowly approaching wall of clouds was the distinct smell of moisture and a significantly colder gust.

"Of course a storm front is moving in.. and right where I need to go.." mumbled the pegasus, a distinct hint of annoyance in his voice. With the front moving in within the next hour or so, based on their distance, Midnight considered turning back towards home. Despite the coming weather, however, the stallion shook his head and pushed on, diving lower to avoid any further clouds.

After a bit more flying, the stallion would eventually arrive at his destination. Coming to a landing with a soft 'pomf', Midnight's hooves sank into the damp grass that lined the cliff's edge. The Celestial Sea stretched out for eternity below him, its deep blue water softly lapping against the chalk-white cliffs he stood atop of.

Midnight's ears perked up right after landing, the distinct rumbling of thunder sending shivers up his spine as he turned to eye the quickly approaching storm. It roared along in the distance, the cold wind starting to whistle once more along the cliff face.

The stallion turned and began to dig through his saddlebags, pulling forth a small wooden box with a bit of weight behind it. Engraved along its finely cut face was a heart with a paw print in the center, along with a name written in cursive.

His eyes watered as he read her name.

Turning back to his saddlebags, Midnight pulled forth a few more items of note. He revealed a small red bow, a simple pink collar with a bronze bell, and a patchwork stuffed mouse along with a trowel.

There was a moment of silence from the stallion as he placed the various belongings onto the grass ahead of him, the wind howling in the background seemingly to have been blocked out. Her things sat there, staring at him with such intensity that the approaching maelstrom felt like little more than a breeze.

He hated it.

What had started as a single tear turned into several as the pegasus grabbed his trowel, digging into the thick grass that lined the clifftop, his ears flat against his head as he did his best to focus on the task at hand. Despite the boiling guilt, steaming shame or volatile cocktail of other emotions, Midnight maintained a steady hoof as he dug through the topsoil.

Wiping his muzzle to clean the tears away, Midnight turned and placed the somewhat heavy box into the freshly dug hole. It fit snugly into its new home, the engraving facing up at him. A grimace broke through the focus as the stallion turned to grab those belongings, ignoring the much louder rumbles of thunder.

With hesitation, the stallion reached down and lightly pulled at the top of the box, a soft click notifying him that it had given way. Pulling the top off, he revealed a divider splitting the interior of the box into two. The top section laid empty, with red cloth lining its walls and floor to provide a comfortable resting place for her memories.

The bottom half contained her.

Resting behind a small, plastic window lay the ashes of his lost pet, his partner, his family. It stared back at his cyan eyes with a stark emptiness, her entire being reduced to a dirty gray mass, locked away inside a tiny box. Tears once wiped away came back in force, quickly flying from his muzzle as the wind around him grew in intensity.

Midnight wasted little time, grabbing the bow, collar and mouse toy and quickly placing them as carefully as possible into the top compartment of the box. Just as he was about to pull out the other plastic cover, he turned to his wing and plucked out a feather, placing it alongside her belongings.

With her belongings secured and a piece of him to protect them, the stallion slipped a second plastic shield over the top compartment, mimicking the one protecting her ashes. Just as the cover slipped into place, raindrops began to lightly splash against both it and the stallion above.

Midnight paused for a moment to register the raindrop before turning to the north, his eyes wide with horror. The orange, red and yellow streaks from Celestia's setting sun were smothered by the ever growing tide of rain. The very sky itself screamed around the pony, thunder and wind now nearly deafening as Midnight fought to close and bury her before the torrent started.

Fortunately, his efforts were rewarded, with the box successfully saved from the coming storm beneath the soil. The only thing that would alert any to its presence was that trowel Midnight had used to dig earlier, now stuck into the dirt as a makeshift grave marker.

Midnight stood back from the spot, raising his wing to protect his bright blue mane from the ever worsening weather. There was no way he'd be able to fly home like this, much less give her a proper send off.

Walking over to a tree atop a nearby hill, the stallion sat down and did his best to shield himself from the downpour.

The moment he did, it was over.

His focus shattered the second his flank hit the wet grass and roots of the tree, tears streaming off his muzzle wildly as any composure he had built up crumbled alongside the rapidly deteriorating weather. Lost in grief, Midnight howled much the same as the winds above while thunder rumbled the world to its very core.

Pain.

Raw, unadulterated pain shot through the stallion as each scream that fell from his muzzle fought against the ever growing winds. Shame at what he had done and what he had failed to do gnawed at him. Fear at what came next, fury at his mistakes and overwhelming grief all battled for dominance in his exhausted mind with a fury only matched by the raging storm above.

Above all else, the stallion felt something worse as he stared at that grave, that final reminder of somepony who had graced his life, who had grown up with him and loved him so truly.

Midnight Lancer felt cold.

Author's Note

Please feel free to leave any feedback you may have in the comments. This is a personal project, a way for me to gain some closure, but I do want constructive feedback as with all my works. Thank you for taking the time to read.