Hoof, Line, and Sinker

by Fyn16

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Adventure
Length: 3310

Strange intruders, disappearing ponies... what is Ponyville coming to?

On a rather important day, Nimbus finds himself tied up in a mysterious chain of events, set in motion by a strange intruder in the skies over Ponyville. What forces are at work here? Is this perhaps some devious plot, or is there a much deeper, hidden reason for this madness?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-10-12 08:50:01 UTC

Hoof, Line, and Sinker

Hoof, Line, and Sinker

A crisp, cool breeze blew through the streets of Ponyville, kicking up fallen leaves of all colors. Pumpkins, squashes, and gourds decorated food stands in the streets, and the smell of freshly-baked pies of many flavors filled the air. Ponies were bustling about, running errands and performing their daily duties as usual, but at this time of the year, there was a certain air of contentment. Everything just felt right.

In a (rather shoddily-constructed) wooden tower on the outskirts of Ponyville, Nimbus, the town’s resident Equestrian Air Force Pegasus, was sitting behind an old desk and chatting up a storm with Rainbow Dash, his self-appointed flying partner, informing her of his most recent exploits.

“… So I’m chasing this Chimaera, right?” Nimbus said, “and I’m coming in closer, to tag this thing with a magic mark for Fluttershy, and as I get closer I reach back into my pack to grab the mark… and pull out a bag of Krispy Oats, my on-the-go snack!”

“No!” Rainbow Dash said, stifling a laugh.

“Oh, just wait- it gets better. I try to stuff the thing back into the pack and find the mark as well. Turns out Fluttershy still has the thing! I try to hightail it out of there, but when I try to stuff my snack back into the pack, the bag tears. Now I don’t know how much you know about Chimaeras, but their sense of smell is very good- and I think this one liked Krispy Oats.”

Rainbow Dash snorted, still trying not to laugh.

“So this thing turns around and I try to stuff the snack back in and zip the pack up. Again- problem: I zip the bag into the zipper, and it gets stuck. Now I have no choice but to hightail it out of there, dragging some wonderful-smelling food behind me with a hungry Chimaera on my tail. At any rate, that’s why I crashed into Applejack’s barn yesterday.”

Rainbow Dash couldn’t hold it in any longer, guffawing heartily at the story. “Nimbus,” she said between chuckles, “that’s awesome! I wish I could’ve seen it.”

“Yeah, it was sure something,” Nimbus agreed, straightening up his olive-green flight suit.

“Well I’ve got to go,” said Rainbow Dash. “Mecha wants some help setting up Applejack’s barn as a haunted house, as well as fixing the damage you caused. Nightmare Night’s coming right up, you know.”

“Alright,” said Nimbus, “take care then!”

Rainbow Dash gave Nimbus a mock salute and leaped from the tower, soaring off towards Applejack’s house. Nimbus sighed. Today was his birthday, and though he enjoyed working his shift guarding Ponyville, he wished he could be on the ground, celebrating the beautiful season with everyone else. Back home, he knew his family would be decorating, baking, and doing just about everything they could to celebrate the season. Up here, in his tower, he was stuck with his helmet and flight suit, a pair of binoculars, and a notebook. Deciding he had nothing better to do, Nimbus began absently scribbling in the notebook, desperate to pass the time.

After a half hour had passed, Nimbus was bored again. He thought about trying to find shapes in the clouds, but decided against it. There were almost no clouds in the sky today. He was about to recline in his chair, when the comm in his helmet crackled to life with a call from South Peak Watch, a guard station located near a mountain just south of Ponyville.

“Ponyville Niner-Three, this is South Peak Watch, over…”

Nimbus picked up the helmet and slipped it on, acknowledging the call. “South Peak Watch, this is Ponyville Niner-Three. Go ahead, over.”

“Ponyville Niner-Three, we have updates regarding the arrival of Princesses Celestia and Luna in Ponyville today.”

Nimbus almost fell out of his seat in surprise. He’d nearly forgotten about the Princesses’ routine visit today!

“Roger, South Peak Watch. Please continue, over.”

“Ponyville Niner-Three, our scouts just sighted a single pony, bearing no distinguishable marks of any sort headed on a direct intercept course with the royal procession. You’re the only pony between the procession and a potential threat. Try to divert this pony’s flight, and if such action is impossible, you have permission to engage, over.”

“Roger,” said Nimbus, zipping his flight suit up the rest of the way and adjusting his helmet, “moving to intercept, over.”

“We’re sending the coordinates of the intruder to your helmet now. Good luck, Nimbus. South Peak Watch out.”

A moment later, Nimbus’s heads-up display on his helmet’s visor displayed a single green square dead ahead. The target’s altitude was high, and it was still far away- plenty of time for an intercept. Nimbus grinned. He enjoyed high-altitude intercepts, and as today was his birthday, he was hoping for success. He flexed his wings and launched off the tower, climbing into the blue. Within seconds of taking off, his helmet displayed a dotted line, leading to a waypoint in the distance: his intercept point. Nimbus banked left and proceeded to follow the line, making sure to adjust his speed so he’d hit the point at exactly the same time as the target. Soaring through the clear sky, he didn’t have a care in the world, aside from his duty, and had no idea what performing this simple task would involve him in…

…

Within a few minutes, Nimbus was only half a mile away from the contact point. He readied himself to confront the intruder, tightening the straps on his gauntlet/sheathes as he flew. He hoped this wouldn’t come to violence, but he was prepared if it did. Slowly, he turned, making final course adjustments, when without warning, the intruder blazed past, almost colliding with him. Nimbus banked sharply and followed the pony, flying just off its left side. The pony wore a black jumpsuit, with black wings and tail as well, topped by an equally black facemask with a dark visor. Nimbus shuddered. This did not look like somepony to mess with. Nonetheless, he proceeded with his duty.

“Unidentified Pegasus,” he yelled, his voice amplified by the helmet’s speakers, “you have been ordered to divert. You are on a restricted course.”

The pony turned its covered head towards him once, then turned back, ignoring him.

“I say again,” said Nimbus, “turn back or I will use all means necessary to ensure that you do!”

Still, he received no response. Nimbus flew closer, now right next to the pony.

“Last warning,” he said.

Suddenly, the pony lashed out, kicking Nimbus with its back leg and spiraling away.

“This is Nimbus to all available frequencies,” Nimbus spat, diving after the pony, “the intruder has attacked. I am now engaging!”

He dove, following the intruder as it flew towards the ground, using its slipstream to gain speed. Just before he caught the pony, however, it turned sharply, banking towards a mountain range. Nimbus matched the pony’s maneuvers-rolling, diving, terrain masking- but he made no progress in catching the intruder. They soared through the mountains with the speed of falcons, flying low and fast. Nimbus roared over a group of ponies hiking, startling them.

“Sorry!” he called back, “just trying to neutralize a threat! The EAF apologizes!”

The pony ahead banked and rolled into a cave, and still Nimbus followed, dodging stalactites and stalagmites left and right. Light inside was minimal, and dodging obstacles became difficult. The pony ducked under a rock arch, forcing Nimbus to follow. Unfortunately, the arch sat just above a pool of water. Nimbus took several drops to the face, and shook himself dry, narrowly missing a cave wall in the process. Finally, Nimbus saw light, and followed the mysterious pony towards it.

The two soared upwards and out of the cave, cresting a mountain. Nimbus actually brushed snow off the peak. He turned as the pony did, closing the distance rapidly. He was close now, and extended his blades…

And at that moment, his helmet squawked to life.

“Nimbus, this is South Peak Watch! Disengage immediately!”

Nimbus did a double-take. He was supposed to disengage a potential threat?

“South Peak Watch, this is Nimbus. Please verify!”

“Nimbus, things have changed. Celestia and Luna are here, but… you’d better come back quickly!”

“Darn it!” Nimbus cursed, and broke off.

“You got off lucky this time,” he said as he watched the mysterious pony disappear, “but next time you so much as stick a hoof into Ponyville airspace…”

He let the threat hang in midair, turning and zooming back to Ponyville. It was time to find out just what was going on.

…

From above, nothing seemed amiss. Ponyville looked as it always did. From the call he’d received, Nimbus could have sworn the place was under attack.

“South Peak Watch, This is Nimbus, over,” Nimbus said into his comm. His only response was static.

“South Peak Watch, This is Nimbus. Please respond, over.”

Hearing nothing he flew lower, heading back to his tower.

“Odd,” he said, looking down at the streets of Ponyville. They were completely empty. Celestia and Luna usually drew the entire town out into the open. What was going on? Nimbus landed on his watchtower, looking around everywhere- still not a pony in sight.

“Well if there’s no one here,” he reasoned aloud, “there’s no one to guard. Let’s see what’s going on here.” He jumped off the tower and landed in the street, the sound of his landing seeming suddenly loud compared to the dead silence around. Slowly he walked in the direction of his house, in the center of town. Ponyville’s clock tower loomed ahead, frozen on  2:03.

“Huh?” Nimbus stated. He flipped down his helmet’s visor and checked the clock on his heads-up display. It was only 11:30.

“Now that’s just weird,” he said, “why 2:03? That's the exact time I was born!”

He proceeded to the clock tower, deciding there might be some sort of clue there. As he rounded a corner, passing a pastry shop, he got the shock of his life. There, in front of the clock tower, was the royal carriage, turned onto its side. Nimbus rushed over, to see if anypony was hurt. He grabbed the carriage door and yanked it open, prepared for the worst.

But no one was inside.

Nimbus took one look inside the carriage to make sure no one was in, then closed the door. Slowly he turned around and faced the clock tower, eyes widening and pupils constricting. Slowly, he broke into a wide grin and began to chuckle to himself.

“Hee hee- it’s okay! There’s- oohoohoohoo!- no one here but me! Whoopee! Happy Birthday, Nimbus! Happy Birthday from the nonexistent residents of Ponyville! Ha ha ha! How about a promotion? Wouldja like that? Eh?”

Nimbus’s eyes crossed over, and he leaped up into the air, performing a well-executed flip. He then promptly crashed to the ground in a heap, knocking himself back to sense.

He shook his head and took one more glance inside the carriage, and that was when he saw it- a small piece of paper sitting on the carriage’s floor. Nimbus took it and read the message written on it.

Nimbus-

By now you are aware of Ponyville’s fate. If you wish to see everyone again, fly west, to the abandoned dragon’s cave. There you will find the answer. If you do not comply by 2:03 p.m., Ponyville will witness a great loss. Consider your options carefully, and decide.

Time is running out, after all.

Nimbus set the paper down, shaking. Something much bigger than himself and his problems was going on here. If he didn’t play the mysterious letter-writer’s game, Ponyville would suffer some sort of great loss. It was time for action.

He turned and galloped the rest of the way home, throwing his front door open. He dropped off his flight suit, helmet, and sheathes. It would be best to approach this stranger unarmed. When he’d put everything away, he walked back out and closed the front door behind him.

“Okay,” he said, “the dragon’s cave is west of here. That way!”

He looked left, towards a row of mountains, and remembered Twilight telling him about the time a dragon had taken up residence there.

“And off we go,” he said, taking to the sky and leaving the ghost town that once was Ponyville behind.

…

He found himself at the cave shortly, landing in front of it and fighting the high winds that were buffeting him. He stepped inside, to get out of the wind, and took notice of his surroundings. The cave itself was quite large, but near the ceiling were several small caves that seemed to branch off in several directions.

“I could infiltrate this place using those caves,” he thought, flying up to one and peering in. It seemed large enough, and it was headed towards the back of the cave- just the sort of covert entrance he was looking for. He slipped in and began to follow the tunnel, occasionally knocking his head against the ceiling. All was quiet. He could only hear the faint dripping of cave water.

As he moved forward, he noticed something ahead. He squinted, trying to make out what it was. As he came closer, it became clear he was looking at an exit. Quickly, he scooted over to it and peered out. Below was a pitch-black area. Nimbus couldn’t have seen into it if he’d tried. In front of the area, however, lit by some sort of luminescent cave fungus, was a small passage, and standing in the middle was-

Nimbus gasped, then covered his mouth. The black-jumpsuited pony was here, standing guard in the passage. So it was involved in this, too. Nimbus’s face contorted into a snarl. When he got his hooves on-

“Well hi there!”

Nimbus nearly jumped out of his skin, though he did, in fact, jump, impacting the ceiling.

“Ow!” he groaned, “who’s-“ he turned around, face-to-face with a familiar pink pony.

“Pinkie Pie?” he said, “you escaped?”

“Oh yeah,” she said, “I had to get away from all that work.”

“Wait,” Nimbus said, “you mentioned work? What’s going on here? Did they kidnap you and force you into labor? This is worse than I thought! I have to tell Celestia, but wait- she’s here, too!”

“How did you know that?” Pinkie Pie asked, “that was supposed to be a-“

“Never mind, Pinkie,” Nimbus said, pushing her ahead, back the way he’d come, “let’s get you to safety first. You can tell me everything when we’re out of here.”

“I don’t think you really-“

“Shh!” Nimbus said, “not now! Save the talking for later! Let’s get out of here!”

He pushed Pinkie Pie, using his wings for extra speed, and blindly traveling forward. Unfortunately, he went the wrong way, traveling down a side passage. Nimbus was expelled back into the main cave, where he bounced off a wall and hit the ground. The last thing he saw before he blacked out was Pinkie Pie looking back into the cave, and something dark moving towards him…

…

Nimbus woke up sharply, with a bucket of cold water thrown in his face. He gasped for air, trying to make sense of his surroundings. Everything was dark. Suddenly, a bright light switched on in front of him. Nimbus cringed, trying to adjust. There, standing next to the light, was the mysterious pony he’d chased earlier.

“You,” said Nimbus, “it’s you again. What do you want with Ponyville- with me?!”

The figure chuckled. “Simple. Your… participation is all I want.”

The voice that spoke was definitely female, and Nimbus could swear he’d heard it before…

“Participation in what, exactly? What sort of sick and twisted game are you playing? What have you done with Ponyville’s residents?”

“Oh, they’re fine,” the pony said, stepping forward until her face was close to Nimbus’s. Nimbus tried peering through the tinted visor of her mask, and thought he saw something. The eyes- the eyes seemed so familiar to him! Where had he seen them before?

“I’ll do what I have to, just let the others go. You can’t just take them here and force them into labor!”

“Labor?” The figure cocked her head to the side in confusion, then began to laugh.

“You silly foal! You think this is about labor? Open your eyes! There’s a much greater purpose at hoof here!”

“And what might that purpose be?” Nimbus spat.

Slowly, the figure raised a hoof. Nimbus steeled himself for a hit, but a hit never came. Instead, the pony began to remove her mask. When she was fully revealed, Nimbus felt his jaw could have dropped all the way to the floor.

“Rainbow Dash?” he asked.

Rainbow Dash nodded, then grinned wickedly. “Welcome, Nimbus,” she said.

“I don’t understand! What have you-?”

“And happy birthday!” she whooped, as lights all over the cave turned on. As Nimbus looked, he saw every resident of Ponyville present for the celebration, and he nearly fainted when he saw Equestria’s princesses approaching.

Nimbus started to bow, getting down on a knee, when Celestia corrected him.

“Oh please, stop that! Today’s your celebration! Go out and have some fun!”

Nimbus thanked her and stood, smiling back at Rainbow Dash. Rainbow returned the gesture with a huge, cheesy grin of her own.

“Rainbow Dash, that intruder today- that was you, then?”

Rainbow Dash nodded. “That’s right. That black mane, tail, and wing paint was a nightmare to wash out. And I… held back a little in the chase, just so you thought you could catch me.”

“Right,” said Nimbus, rolling his eyes in mock exasperation, “we’ll see about that. Shall we hit Ghastly Gorge later?”

“You’re on,” Rainbow Dash grinned, turning away to talk with Applejack, who had just approached.

When Nimbus turned back to the crowd, he got the surprise of his life. Pinkie Pie was there, wheeling out a massive cake decorated with the colors of Equestria. On top, there was even a full-sized Equestrian flag. Pinkie Pie bounced over to Nimbus.

“Isn’t it just great?” she asked, “I totally fooled you! You thought I was in danger, but I wasn’t! And then you fell, and there was cake, and Rainbow Dash was there, and-“

“Pinkie,” Nimbus said, “did you arrange all of this?”

“Mmhmm!” Pinkie nodded, “but there’s one problem.”

“And what’s that?” Nimbus asked, staring in awe at the cake and salivating.

“It’s too tall for me to cut! We need a Pegasus to do it! Wouldja like to have the honors?”

Nimbus was overjoyed. “Would I like to? Of course I would! Stand back, everyone! Pinkie Pie, lay plates out around the cake. Let’s see how my flying skills are.”

Pinkie Pie handed him the cake knife, and Nimbus took off and flew back, away from the party and out of the cave. Pinkie was frozen.

“Did he just… leave?” she asked, her lower lip starting to quiver.

Suddenly, a speck appeared in the sky outside the cave, growing larger, and Rainbow Dash knew what was about to happen.

“Lay out those plates!” she yelled, “and be quick!”

Nimbus rocketed back into the cave, heading straight for the cake. When he reached it, he was everywhere, flipping, skidding, looping, rolling- using every trick he’d ever learned. When he was done, he hovered, breathing heavily. The cake seemed intact.

“Um… Nimbus?” Pinkie said, “you’re supposed to cut the cake.”

Nimbus held up a hoof- the sign to wait. Slowly, the cake slid apart, separating itself into perfectly-cut, individual pieces. Each piece landed on a plate. The cave was silent, then erupted in a cheer! Nimbus beamed, grabbing a plate as everyone began to sing “Happy Birthday.” As he dug into his cake, he realized that today was perhaps the best birthday he’d ever had.