Rarity's Mysterious Pills

by Pony-Berserker

Rating: teen
Tags: Sex, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Slice of Life, Thunderlane, Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rarity, Romance
Length: 5248

Sweetie Belle wants to reveal her sister's secret but curiosty killed the pony...

Rarity has a secret, and it is certainly not one she wants out anytime soon. When the Cutie Mark Crusaders discover some unusual pills that Rarity owns, will they be able to deduce what it is?

More importantly, will they have the capacity to understand it?

Published 2012-10-18 22:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-16 01:45:32 UTC

Pills and Lies

Sweetie Belle was drawing a picture of some unrecognizable bird. Had she taken any art lessons, she might have been able to at least make it look like a bird. She spent a lot of time on drawing because there was always possibility that was her special talent, regardless of how unlikely it may have been.

“Sweetie Belle! I need to visit pharmacy. I’m leaving you here alone!” her older sister Rarity shouted from another room.

That actually confused Sweetie Belle. “Are you sick, Rarity?” She asked her sister, getting up and dropping her crayons for the moment.

“What? No, no, no, no,” the purple-maned unicorn leaned into the room, looking abashed. “I need to... er, buy some... cream! er, hoof cream that is.”

“Hoof cream?” Sweetie Belle gave her sister a suspicious look. “What do you need it for.” In the time that Sweetie Belle had been around her sister, she had never seen Rarity use any sort of hoof cream, so this brought up suspicions and questions, which were quickly dispelled as Rarity replied.

“Oh, darling. I use hoof-cream all the time! A lady needs to care about her hooves. You have no idea how sensitive my hooves can be.” a feigned smile. She still looked a mite uneasy.

Sweetie Belle frowned but quickly brightened. “Okay, sister. I'll guard our house." With sudden realization and a massive grin, she shouted out, “Cutie Mark Crusader Sentinel!” She stiffened up and tried to look tough, but her attention was averted back to her drawings.

“That’s great.” Rarity sighed and went out, closing the door behind her. As she left the boutique, she was left to her thoughts. She did not expect such interrogation. She never liked to explain herself for any reason… at least, not for that reason, and not to her little sister. She would know someday what she was going to do and it wouldn’t be the brightest idea to tell her the truth at that moment, but it would have to come out at some point.

Not today, Rarity thought to herself as she trotted on.

One hour and several formless birds later, Rarity got home from the pharmacy. "Sweetie Belle, I’m back. I’m sorry that it took so long but I met... um, a friend! You know how it is, small talk becomes big talk,” Rarity excused herself while putting her shopping in the chest of drawers in the hall.

“No problem, sis!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed happily. “I’ve been drawing all that time. Look!” The young filly showed her sister some of her drawings, most of which resembled colorful blobs or misshapen creatures.

“Oh... Nice alligators, Sweetie,” Rarity answered hoping for a good guess. “Anyway, I know it’s dinner time but I totally forgot that today is my spa day. So, be dear and get a sandwich while I’m away. I’ll be back in an hour. Or three.”

“Okay...” Sweetie Belle said sadly. Rarity turned happily and departed, leaving a slightly forlorn Sweetie Belle alone once more. She murmured after her sister left, “These weren’t alligators…”

Sweetie Belle returned to her drawing but she could not focus at all. She looked at the chest of drawers from time to time, thoughts of the hoof cream continually pervading her thoughts. Just three days earlier Diamond Tiara had laughed at her neglected hooves, stating that they looked dirtier than a Donkey’s hooves after trudging through mud.

An idea struck her. Maybe she could use some of this specimen on her hooves and free herself from Diamond Tiara’s taunts. She mentally argued with herself for several minutes before deciding it was a good idea, so she trotted to the chest of drawers and took a peek inside the bag.

There was no cream.

“Pills? Rarity said she wasn’t ill.” Sweetie Belle said aloud, taking a pill box from a bag “Cort... Corn... Contrap... Contraception pills? What is this?” Sweetie Belle was puzzled. She had never heard about such a word, plus the front side of the box did not give any clear information that would explain its meaning. There were written the typical warnings like: ‘keep in dry and cool place’ and ‘keep out of foals’ reach.’ “Maybe Rarity is sick?” Sweetie tried to find an explanation. “She actually looked a bit nervous when I asked her about that. Gotta show it to Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. Maybe they’ll know what it’s for!” she said to herself, snatching up her saddlebags. She stuffed the pill bottle inside then hastily exited the building, hoping to find an answer to this dilemma.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders met at the playground.

“Ah can’t even read that,” said Apple Bloom looking at the ‘contraception’ word. “Scoot, what d’ya think of it?”

Scootaloo examined the box and and bottle, paying caution attention to small details, and then started to read the tiny letters. “There’s something written here. I think it’s important.” She said, squinting to read the tiny print. “Hm.. it says, ‘With our pills you can enjoy safe bucking.’” Scootaloo read aloud. This statement, as straightforward as it should have been, brought nothing more than confusion to the three fillies.

“Safe buckin’?” Apple Bloom gave a surprised look, snatching the bottle away from Scootaloo to get a better look, “That sounds like sumthin’ for mah sister! She always complains about apples fallin’ on ‘er head after she bucks a tree.”

“But what do those pills have to do with that?” Sweetie Belle asked, contemplating the mysterious description and all options she could tie to it. Nothing made sense at this point.

“Ah have no idea. Let’s go’n show it tah AJ. She’ll prolly know,” Apple Bloom suggested. With a nod, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo agreed.

“But, why did Rarity buy this? She never helps your sister with bucking the trees,” Sweetie Belle remarked, challenging the potential solution they had just come up with.

The fillies looked even more perplexed. Indeed, it didn’t make any sense at all. Rarity was the last mare who needed safety during apple bucking, seeing as she never did any of it and was highly unlikely to do so in the future.

“I know what’s going on.” Scootallo spoke up, irritated. “That’s probably their magic of friendship stuff again. You know, Rarity's probably going to help Applejack and then Twilight will write a letter to Princess Celestia, or something cheesy like that.”

“That doesn’t sound like something Rarity would do.” Sweetie Belle said, knowing full well that her sister knew could be helpful and generous to her friends but she certainly wasn’t helpful to that degree. Besides, she and Applejack weren’t the best friends either, so none of it seemed to add up.

“Ah think we should ask anyway,” Apple Bloom said, bringing the CMC back onto their original plan. “Adult ponies always say we should ask if we don’t know sumthin’.”

“Alright, let’s go,” Scootaloo commanded her friends. The Cutie Mark Crusaders trotted to Sweet Apple Acres with questions in their minds and pills in tow.

The three fillies stormed into Applejack’s house and found her in her room. Applejack, at that moment, was leaning against the wardrobe. She looked nervous, but they figured that was likely because they startled her.

“Oh, horseapples!” the orange pony swore and then looked at the fillies, disguising her nervous appearance with a false smile. “What’s up, girls?”

“We’ve got a question, sis!” Apple Bloom proclaimed.

“Huh, sure. Whatever Ah can help you with, girls,” Applejack said hastily, clearly eager to get the three out of her room.

“So, Sweetie Belle found those pills,” Scootaloo started.

“But we don’t know what they do,” Apple Bloom continued.

“So we brought them to you!” Sweetie Belle finished.

Applejack looked at the box of pills that Sweetie Belle held in her mouth. “Lemme give a look-see.” The orange pony took the box and started reading: “With our pills you can enjoy safe bucking. Take at least ten minutes before..." She stopped as realization struck her. Slightly horrified, she asked the fillies: "Girls, where’d ya get these?”

“Rarity bought ‘em,” Apple Bloom answered.

Whew! Applejack nearly sighed in relief. "Oh, um, and why’d ya bring ‘em tah me?” Applejack was sweating uneasily at this point, her eyes darting about as though looking for an escape route..

“Because you buck all the time!” her sister exclaimed, not realizing what she had just suggested.

The answer startled Applejack. . The sound of a box full of pills colliding with the floor echoed through the house. “W-what!? Girls!” She stuttered, sweating heavily.

The fillies looked confused. Why did Applejack react this way to such an obvious fact? A good portion of her daily life included it. “But you buck apples pretty of'n, sis...” Apple Bloom said quietly, still trying to piece together why Applejack had reacted to unexpectedly.

Applejack felt relieved. “Phew... Ah thought that, um, never mind. Yep, Ah often buck. Apples. Ah buck apples. Sure do.” she quickly stated with a nervous laugh.

“So, what do these pills do?” Apple Bloom inquired again.

“Oh, they, um,” Applejack glanced around as she devised a fabrication, “give some, um, they’re like, err, a power-up! Yep, a power-up so you can buck better. Y’know, Apples. ‘Course.” Applejack’s answer wasn’t the whole truth, so it fought heavily with her natural honesty. It was taking all of her willpower not to tell the fillies the entire truth.

“But why do they make this safer?” asked Scootaloo, still just as confused.

“Girls, Ah think y'all ask too many questions, Ah'm kinda busy 'cause Ah have to do some, um… bucking...” Applejack said, attempting to escort the fillies out. They held their ground.

“Tell us, sis. Pleeeeeeaaaaase?” Apple Bloom said, pulling off her best ‘puppy-dog-eyes’ look.

Applejack nearly broke right then.

“It makes it safer because, err, the apples fall further from the tree. Yeah, that’s why!” Applejack said triumphantly, happy that she came up with a solution that was both the truth and cryptic enough that the fillies would take it literally.

The three fillies stared blankly at the orange pony for a while as gears in their heads turned. Applejack looked more uncomfortable with each second passed.

Albeit slowly, they finally pieced it together.

“Oh, that would explain it,” Scootaloo said finally, breaking the unusual silence.

“Yeah, seems believable,” Sweetie Belle remarked, a grin across her face.

“Thanks, sis!” Apple Bloom said, happy to have found out what the pills were for.

“That’s just dandy. Now, Ah think y’all should take these pills back to Rarity’s place,” suggested Applejack, turning the fillies about-face and giving them a push. “but.. Ah’ll chek ‘em out for ya.” She took one pill, and then gave the box to Sweetie Belle.

“Sure thing, sis!” exclaimed Apple Bloom.

“Hey! Maybe we can get our Cutie Marks in package delivery!” Scootaloo exclaimed, bringing bright faces all around.

“Cutie Mark Crusaders Deliverers!” the three fillies exclaimed in unison, galloping out of the house.

Applejack stood in place for a while and then opened the wardrobe, revealing a scrunched-up pony who had been hiding the whole time.

“Y’all can get outta there, Caramel. They’re gone.” she said.

Caramel fell out of the wardrobe, stretching himself out and taking big, exaggerated breaths. “I thought I was going to die there!” he shouted.

“Chill out, big boy. They’re gone and we can get back to business,” Applejack said slyly, stepping away from the wardrobe and towards her bed.

“Oh, yes, sure.” The excited stallion leaned toward Applejack as if to kiss her but she quickly put a hoof in his mouth.

“Hold yer horses, partner. Safety comes first! Ah gotta wait ten minutes so the pill’ll be workin’ fer sure. Ah might be a cowgirl, but Ah’m a responsible mare as well.” Applejack seemed irritated by Caramel’s impatience.

“Well, sure, but...” Caramel started, but Applejack’s mouth shut his, thankfully in a gentler manner.

“Yes, you can use your rubber as well.”

Needless to say, that pill helped the apples fall far from the tree.

In the meantime, Rarity returned home. Sweetie Belle, I’m baaaaack!” she shouted, expecting a warm welcome from her sister. When no welcome came, she called out, “Sweetie? Are you there?” There was no response. “That’s unusual. Well, she probably went out with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom. At least I’ll have some time to prepare myself with no one to disturb me.” On that note, Rarity set some things aside and started about her business.

Rarity started to brush her mane in front of the mirror. Thanks to her magic capabilities, she was moving things she needed without having to look away. After a few minutes, she decided to take the pill she had bought that morning, seeing as it would take ten minutes to be effective anyhow. She used her magic to open the drawer she had placed the box in, then she took a pill.

A pill from another box.

Unfortunately, she didn’t notice that fact, so she resumed brushing her hair and preparing herself in general.

Some time later, she was ready to go.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders were walking down the main street in Ponyville, happily toting the pills back to Rarity’s place.

“Okay, so now we know what those pills are for. But there’s still something we don’t. Why Rarity? It still doesn’t make sense.” Scootaloo had gotten worked up and couldn’t calm herself down. She simply couldn’t stop thinking about the matter, seeing as apple bucking was simply something that Rarity didn’t do. "I think we should talk to Rarity,” Scootaloo said confidently, determined to get an answer.

“Well, we can do this right now I think. Look, there she is!” Sweetie Belle said, pointing a hoof toward her sister, whom had conveniently been nearby at the time. “Where is she going anyway? She’s not going to the spa… or our house, for that matter.”

“Well, let’s follow her then,” Scootaloo suggested. The other two fillies agreed with nods, and they were quickly in pursuit.

Rarity was unaware of her followers. She was thinking about what was going to happen soon and didn’t really pay attention to the surrounding world. As she walked, The Cutie Mark Crusaders became less and less familiar with the surrounding area, until Rarity ended up at the front door of somepony’s house. The three fillies hid in a nearby bush.

“Whose house is this?” Sweetie Belle asked, looking over the house to see if she recognized its occupant.

“I’m not sure. Let’s check it out!” Scootaloo encouraged her friends, then they snuck up to the window.

“Madame Rarity. So good you’re finally here!” a black-coated Pegasus answered the door, welcoming his guest.

“Oh, Thunderlane, honey. Don’t be so formal.” Rarity giggled and entered the building. Thunderlane closed the door behind her.

“It’s... Thunderlane?” Scootaloo couldn’t believe her eyes. She rubbed them, but Thunderlane remained existant. What was Rarity doing with Thunderlane?

“I didn’t know Rarity knows him that well,” Sweetie Belle said, slightly puzzled.

“Shh, let’s see what they are gonna do.” Apple Bloom hushed her friends and continued gazing through the window.

“Probably some boring talking...” Scootaloo looked pretty resigned and turned to leave, but the other two stopped her and convinced her to come back to the window.

“You see, I thought you would never invite me over, so I made you invite me. I hope you were okay with that?” Rarity asked Thunderlane, clearly not expecting an answer.

“Oh, yes. Totally!” Thunderlane answered excitedly.

“You look rather excited, aren’t you?” Rarity stroke Thunderlane’s mane. “You aren’t a novice in that kind of thing, am I right?” she asked in a seductive tone.

“Yes, of course!” he answered quickly, false pride displayed on his face, slightly mixed with panic.

“Don’t be afraid, Thundie. I just like younger stallions. You don’t think this is wrong?” Rarity tried to calm Thunderlane down by changing subject.

“No, not at all!” Thunderlane replied, a smile now spread across his lips.

“Wonderful. Oh, I’m bored with this small talk,” Rarity said impatiently. What happened next shocked the three fillies.

She leaned over and kissed a surprised Thunderlane passionately.

“…are you seeing what I’m seeing?” Scootaloo asked. The Cutie Mark Crusaders observed everything through the window, pressing their faces against the panes as though trying to phase through them. Rarity and Thunderlane were obviously too busy with themselves to see the three fillies staring at them.

“Looks like Rarity likes Thunderlane!” Sweetie Belle said giddily, laughing lightly at this new discovery.

“Maybe we should go, guys. It’s not cool to watch when two ponies kiss each other, right?” Apple Bloom suggested, prying her face off the window and turning.

“Yeah, let’s go,” Sweetie Belle agreed, moving to do the same.

The two fillies were just about to move away from the window when Scootaloo suddenly asked with a concerned tone, “Uh, what’s Rarity doing?”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle turned around and reapplied their faces to the glass.

“What is Rarity doing with...” Apple Bloom started and then gasped.

“Ugh, this is disgusting!” Scootaloo said trying to move her eyes away. Somehow, something made her want to look at it anyway.

“I think I’m gonna puke!” Apple Bloom said and covered her mouth with her hooves. She looked for a while at the scene and indeed vomited in the nearest bush.

“Oh my gosh! What are they doing now!?” Scootaloo was terrified.

“Horsepies! Thunderlane’s gonna hurt her!” Apple Bloom cried.

“Ugh, why are they doing this!? This is horrible!” Scootaloo finally closed her eyes.

Unlike her two panicking friends, Sweetie Belle was staring through the window with a confused face.

“I don’t get it,” she said finally.

TO BE CONTINUED

Answers and Books

The Cutie Mark Crusaders were walking in the street... or, to be precise, one of them. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo staggered as the scene they had witnessed left them speechless. Only Sweetie Belle walked normally, but she looked very confused.

"I want to unseen that," Scootaloo moaned.

"Me too. I'm never gonna look at Rarity or Thunderlane the same way again." Apple Bloom shivered.

"So, guys, what were they actually doing?" Sweetie Belle asked but received only confused looks from her friends. "Do you think other ponies do this too?"

"No way!" Apple Bloom shouted.

"I hope not," Scootaloo whispered, still clearly horrified.

"Something fishy’s going on here, guys, and I’ve got a weird hunch it might be connected with those pills." Sweetie Belle said angrily. "My sister bought them and now we saw her doing whatever she was doing. Plus, Applejack is covering her!"

"How's that?" Apple Bloom asked with a puzzled look across her face.

"Don't you think Applejack was pretty nervous when we asked her about these pills?" Sweetie Belle questioned, shooting Apple Bloom a curious look.

"Yeah," Apple Bloom frowned. "If Ah think of it now, she stammered ‘n she looked around all the time." She gasped. "Mah sister was lyin' to us! How could she do such a thing?"

"We need somepony to explain everything to us, and I know just the right pony!" Sweetie Belle said confidently and hurried off. After quickly exchanging glances, the other fillies followed suit.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders had ended up at Twilight’s library… which was simultaneously her house. Sweetie Belle knocked on the door almost viciously, which was quickly answered by a confused librarian.

“Oh, hi, girls. How can I help you?” Twilight asked.

"Do you know what these are for?" Sweetie Belle asked, showing the pills to the lavender unicorn.

"Um, contraceptive pills?" Twilight frowned, running the word through her mind. Finding no answer to the question, she responded, "I have no idea, but I’ll take a look around. I think I had a book with a similar title."

She started to look shelf-to-shelf for anything similar, while Scootaloo and Apple Bloom observed her. Sweetie Belle, on the other hoof, noticed a few books stashed behind a nearby desk.

"Hm..." the curious little unicorn decided to check them out. "Hey girls," she whispered to Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, "Let’s check those out." She pointed with a hoof, so Scootaloo and Apple Bloom came over. They snuck over to the desk silently and began sorting through the hidden books.

"Girls! I found it! There must be something in 'Contraception for Everypony'." Twilight exclaimed and started to search through the pages. Seemingly satisfied in her find, she closed the book and turned back to… an empty floor. Where had the Cutie Mark Crusaders gone?

Back behind the desk, Scootaloo read aloud, "’Everything You Wanted to Know About Bucking But Were Afraid to Ask.’ Now THAT sounds like the answer to all our questions!"

Twilight saw the fillies crowded behind the desk, so she walked up to them curiously. "Girls, what are you doing? Did you find something?"

"That picture looks like Rarity and Thunderlane!" Sweetie Belle exclaimed, pointing to an image in the book. The other two fillies appeared to start suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, which resulted in Scootaloo fainting and Apple Bloom vomiting.

"AAAAAAH!!!" Twilight shouted in horror, hurriedly swiping the book away from Sweetie Belle with her magic, "How did you girls find this!? You can't read that. Even I can't read that Well, I can, but I shouldn't!” She enveloped the three fillies with her lavender aura and moved them directionally away from the table. She then took the book and threw it out the window.

Spike was outside and shouted as he saw the book falling on the ground, "Twilight!? What's going on!?"

"DO AWAY WITH THAT BOOK!" Twilight shouted back, her hair beginning to frizz.

"Buh… what!?"

"BURN IT!"

"Alright," Spike accepted the order, picked the book up and engulfed it in flames. "Oh, wait…" he realized that, by breathing his magic fire on it, he had accidentally sent the book to Princess Celestia in Canterlot. Twilight is SO not going to let me hear the end of this one… he thought to himself, weighing his options, then scurrying off to somewhere else in Ponyville.

Meanwhile, at Canterlot, Princess Luna and Princess Celestia were playing the noble game of chess. Princess Luna was in control of the black pieces, while Princess Celestia had the white pieces. It was clear that Princess Luna was losing… badly.

"We do not enjoy this game anymore," Luna stated flatly.

"Oh, you say that because you can't beat me," Celestia remarked, attempting to hide a snide grin.

Suddenly, a book, which materialized right in front of Princess Celestia, appeared over the chessboard and fell on it. A few pawns broke, along with the chessboard itself.

"Hah! That's a draw, sister!" Luna exclaimed and started a victory dance while Celestia was gazing at the title of the book.

"Why did you throw it away? There were answers for our questions!" Scootaloo groaned, leering at Twilight.

"You girls are too young to read that. There will come a time for that, but it certainly isn’t now. Now that we got that out of the way, let’s get back to your question about the contraceptive pills," Twilight said, happily beginning to search through the book she located earlier. "Ah, here we go! The contraceptive pills are..." Twilight began reading aloud but slowly faded to quiet murmur. After a while her cheeks started to turn a bright shade of red.

"So?" Apple Bloom was showing her impatience.

"Nothing. Nothing here! Not the thing you’re looking for." Twilight said nervously, throwing the book out the window.

"Twilight!" Spike shouted from outside, clearly annoyed, "What's with these books?"

"Crusaders, let's go out and get the book!" Scootaloo commanded and the three fillies trotted outside.

"BURN IT! BURN IT!" Twilight was terrifyed of the possibility that innocent kids would read such a book.

"But..." Spike tried to argue.

"BURN. THE. BOOK!" Twilight shrieked out the window.

"Alright." Spike sighed. He shortly engulfed the book in flames, sending it to the Princess.

Meanwhile, at Canterlot Royal Castle…

Princesses Celestia and Luna were gazing at the book sent by Twilight.

"I am unsure what to think of this." Celestia was confused.

Suddenly, 'Contraception for Everypony' appeared over the already broken chessboard and stacked on the first book.

"That is… unusual." Celestia said.

"We think that thine student wishes to tell you something," Luna remarked.

An awkward silence hung in the air.

"Spike, how could you do that!?" Apple Bloom shouted angrily at Spike.

"Sorry, guys. I have to do what Twilight asks me to," Spike explained, turning to go into the library. He opened the door and stepped inside, then slammed it loudly.

"Stupid lizard!" Apple Bloom shouted angrily.

"I heard that!" Spike retorted through the door.

"Well guys, at least we know what bucking is," Sweetie Belle tried to comfort her upset friends.

"Yeah, but we don't know what it’s for," said Scootaloo, placing a hoof on her chin in curiosity.

"And, what's worse, it looks like all the ponies do that… ugh!" Apple Bloom said, shivering in disgust.

"Why don’t they want us to know?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"Maybe because it's disgusting?" Scootaloo said.

"Yeah, but I still wanna know." Sweetie Belle folded her forelegs and frowned.

"What’cha wanna know?" Pinkie Pie said, suddenly standing behind the Cutie Mark Crusaders.

"Oh, hi Pinkie," Apple Bloom greeted the party pony with a firm hoof shake, "Nopony wanted to tell us what bucking is, and now we know but we don't know why ponies do that."

"Oh, silly, that's simple as pie!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, throwing her hooves up for emphasis.

"Will you tell us?" Scootaloo asked, face brightening. She stared at Pinkie expectantly.

"Sure! I can sing a song..." Pinkie began, stepping up on sta- wait, where did that stage come from?

"No, no, no, no!" The three fillies tried to discourage Pinkie from singing, all waving their hooves in a frenzy, attempting to halt her.

"Okie dokie loki, I’ll just tell you then.” She cleared her throat, “So, when one pony loves another pony, they buck! That's simple as that!" Pinkie said happily.

"Love?" The fillies were taken aback by Pinkie's explanation.

"Yeah. That's why love is so cool!" she explained, giggling audibly.

"Pinkie, do you, um, y’know… buck a lot?" Scootaloo inquired.

"Of course I do. I do a LOT of bucking!" Pinkie answered questions oblivious to potential harm that could be done to the minds of innocent fillies. I mean, seriously. Would you expect her to realize what she was saying in the first place?

"So, you love somepony?" Apple Bloom nudged Pinkie, looking up at her with a grin.

"No, silly! I do this for fun!" the fillies recoiled slightly, not expecting such an answer.

"For fun?" Scootaloo asked, looking up at Pinkie curiously.

"I can always find someone to buck at my parties! Well, girls, sorry, but I gotta go buy some things for my party tonight!" Pinkie excused herself and jumped away. Literally. She bounced away.

"Love is disgusting..." Scootaloo remarked.

"Shure is…" Apple Bloom agreed with a nod.

"Hm..." Sweetie Belle wondered. "Girls!" she shouted excitedly. "Do you know what that means!?"

"No?" answered the orange pegasus.

"That means that Rarity and Thunderlane are in love!"

The other fillies gave Sweetie Belle blank looks.

"Gotta ask Rarity when they're gonna get married!" she exclaimed and trotted to her house.

"She's pretty optimistic, isn't she?" Scootaloo asked.

"Eeyup," Apple Bloom answered.

Meanwhile, at Thunderlane's home…

"That was something, Thundie. I had better, but that’s not bad for such a young stallion," Rarity said indifferently.

"Oh, thank you," he answered, pretty abashed.

"All right, I will be going home. It was a nice afternoon, really. If you will get bored with Cloudchaser, let me know. Bye!" Rarity said and went outside.

When Rarity returned home, Sweetie Belle was awaiting her.

"Rarity! I know what you were doing!" the younger sister exclaimed.

"Whatever do you mean, Sweetie!?" Rarity was startled by her sister.

"I've seen what you and Thunderlane were doing!"

"WHAT!?" Rarity shouted in terror.

"Yeah! You and Thunderlane were bucking! Pinkie said that means that ponies are in love."

"Um, Sweetie, it's not exactly this way..." Rarity struggled to find a suitable answer. She would never expect that her sister, that anypony would know.

"No?" Sweetie Belle saddened. "So you do this for fun?"

Rarity laughed nervously trying to find a good answer. It was hard time for her. She could easily manipulate any male pony into nearly anything but her charm could do nothing against her little sister. To be honest, the situation was exceptionally awkward.

Thankfully, Rarity was quite lucky as at the very moment Twilight stormed into her house.

"Rarity! We need to talk!" Twilight shouted. "Oh, Sweetie Belle. You're already here."

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom went in after Twilight. "I think you all should tell us something!" the orange Pegasus was angry.

"No, you shouldn't know that. Not yet!" Twilight exclaimed nervously.

"Twilight, quickly, cast the reverted memory spell!" Rarity finally found a way out of the situation. "They won't remember anything!"

"Okay..."

Twilight concentrated her magic and before Cutie Mark Crusaders could actually react, they were struck by the spell. "I hope I've done it right." Twilight looked at three staggering fillies.

"Sweetie Belle. Are you all right?" Rarity asked her sister.

"Yeah, I guess so. Oh, Rarity. I wanted to ask you about something. Could you tell me what are those pills for?" Sweetie Belle gained her consciousness back and showed her sister the box of pills. Sweetie didn't know what they were because her memory was cleared to the moment of finding them.

"My pills? How did you get them!?" Rarity trotted up to the chest of drawers and opened it. "They weren't there!? I took... vitamin A!? This means I did it without.... AAAAAAAAH!!!" she shrieked, nearly fainting.

"Rarity?" Twilight was worried about her friend.

"Gotta buy after-bucking pills!" Rarity shouted and galloped outside.

"I don't get it" Sweetie Belle was confused.

"So, girls... Do you want some ice cream?" Twilight asked.

"Yay!" the fillies agreed on the proposition.

Innocent fillies are innocent, Twilight thought, smiling.

THE END

Rarity and Twilight were sitting at the table outside a café. Several passing stallions tried some cheesy pick-up lines and some tried to be at least seen by her.

"You simply cannot trust young stallions these days," Rarity said angrily.

"Hm?"

"Thunderlane bragged about our little date. His friends told their friends and now everypony in Ponyville thinks I am one of those easy mares," Rarity said sadly.

"Maybe you should write a letter to Princess Celestia about that?" Twilight giggled and put some parchment and ink in front of her friend, who frowned upon seeing this.

"Hey, Rarity! You've got a beautiful mane today," Caramel complimented Rarity.

"I always have a beautiful mane," she answered nonchalantly. Caramel shrugged and went away.

"I'm not that easy..." Rarity drank another glass of wine, looking at Caramel, who was slowly walking away. "Oh, whatever. Write the letter for me," she said and trotted after Caramel. "Carameeeel!" she said seductively as she caught up with him.

AUDIO READING

Here you have Zangorwarrior's reading of the story.

The actual reading starts at ~0:45.

During the reading, he tends to pay too much attention to typos. He also comments a few times on the story, but his voice acting is good enough to make up for it.