EQ:PP Night of the Living Cookies

by zooloverryan

Rating: everyone
Tags: Drama, Rainbow Dash (EqG), Comedy, Equestria Girls, Crossover, Main 7 (EqG), Alternate Universe
Length: 3832

Rainbow’s pranking gets out of hand, so Nigel and the girls decide to give her a taste of her own medicine. However, things do not go accordingly to plan.

Rainbow Dash loves playing a prank…or two, or three! To prove that she's the greatest prankster around, she launches a one-girl prank war on all of Prehistoric Park. When she finally goes too far, it's up to Nigel, Pinkie Pie, and the rest of the gang to set her straight with a little prank of their own! But what happens when things go completely south?

Published 2024-08-14 17:50:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-08-15 17:58:45 UTC

A Night at the Bungalow

One night both Twilight and Nigel were sorting out the books in his base after another long day of work at Prehistoric Park.

“Sorry, I lost track of time, mate. I didn’t mean for this to last well into the night.” Nigel apologized as he finished putting away his last book. “There! Everything is all neat and organized.” He said with a smile.

At that moment a book slid out from the shelf and landed on the ground catching Nigel’s attention.

“Huh?” Nigel said in surprise as he placed the book back on its shelf. “Twilight, I thought I told you to make sure these books are on their shelves?” He told her.

“I did.” Twilight innocently said as another book slid from the shelf behind her. “What the…” She exclaimed in surprise. “I swear that wasn’t me!”

“Oh, okay so the books just decide to move on their own and…” Nigel sarcastically commented as a string of books from every shelf was summoned by a powerful gust of wind and circled the room.

“Flippin’ heck!” Nigel shouted in shock as the books all came tumbling down on them a mysterious shadowed figure flew over them with glowing pink eyes and then roared.

Twilight and Nigel both screamed as they tried to escape the den but the mysterious figure immediately locked them inside causing them to back themselves up into the nearby corner completely startled and hugging each other for safety as the figure menacingly flew just over them and roared again.

The figure then laughed as she ran over to turn out the lights.

“Gotcha!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she laughed her flank off and then flew down and rolled down onto the ground laughing at scaring both of her friends.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight and Nigel both exclaimed in shocked anger.

“That wasn’t funny!” Nigel angrily said. “You nearly gave us a heart attack!”

“Yeah!” Twilight agreed in the same tone. “You had us believe this place was cursed for a second there.”

“Aw come on, you have to admit that was funny! You girls just don’t have a sense of humor!” Rainbow still laughed off. “You both should have seen yourselves clinging onto each other like scared little kids. Priceless!”

“You wouldn’t think it was so funny if someone did this to you!” Twilight crossly retorted.

“We are going to talk about this first thing in the morning, Rainbow Dash.” Nigel sternly added. “And I expect you to be here by then!”

“Okay, okay…” Rainbow Dash responded as she raised her hands defensively as she saw Nigel angrily glare at her. “I’ll get out of your hair!” She added as she quickly leaped out of the bungalow in a flash.

“Well, that’s just great.” Twilight sarcastically commented. “Now we got to clean up and organize this place all over again.”

“Thanks, Rainbow Dash!” Nigel grumbled as he and Twilight both set off to do so with an irritated look on his face.

Rainbow's Pranking Spree

The next morning Twilight made good on her promise as all seven girls, Nigel and Bob gathered at the English zoologist’s base to discuss Rainbow’s stunt the previous night.

“I mean, how could you not appreciate that?” Rainbow asked Nigel.

“Because I don't think being scared to death is very fun!” Nigel replied with crossed arms.

“I do! Your heart gets all racy, your knees get all tingly, your mouth gets all dry-ie!” Pinkie happily exclaimed as her heart was rapidly pounding, her knees shaking, and her mouth crunched up for a bit as she chomped her jaw closed. “I don't like that part. But the rest is great!”

“See? Everyone likes a good prank! They're just jokes!” Rainbow Dash spoke up still ignoring the glares Twilight and Nigel were giving her.

“Now, Rainbow Dash…” Bob voiced his concerns. “I don't think Nigel would have called us all here to talk about this if he thought it was funny. Everybody has things they like and things they don't.”

“And scarin' Twilight and Nigel like that is just mean,” Applejack added as she placed a fist on the table.

“Mean?!” Rainbow Dash scoffed taking offense to that comment.

“A prank isn't very good if you're the only one laughing.” Twilight then said softly after having calmed down enough.

“But what if it's really, really, really funny?” Pinkie asked as she hopped over to where Twilight was standing by Fluttershy.

“And I can do funny.” Rainbow Dash confidently said as she sat and rested her legs on the table.

“I know you can.” Fluttershy then said with a warm smile.

“I guess the trick is making sure that your idea of funny matches the person you're pranking,” Nigel said as he made his way to his chair. “That way…” But as Nigel sat down, a loud fart came and was heard throughout the room. He looked under his chair and pulled out a whoopee cushion as Rainbow Dash could barely manage to keep herself from laughing.

Nobody said anything as they had the same unamused expression on their faces except for Pinkie who giggled before joining Rainbow Dash in bursting out laughing.

“Good one, Rainbow! Ha-ha!” Pinkie fist-bumped Rainbow Dash as she turned to Nigel. “You have to admit! That was funny!”

“Not really.” Nigel calmly replied with a scowl as he tossed aside the whoopee cushion.

“Yeah. A whoopee cushion is like a joke shortcut.” Applejack agreed.

“What?!” Pinkie and Rainbow Dash exclaimed in shock at that statement.

“Honestly, Rainbow Dash, if you are not willing to put forth the effort required to pull a prank that everyone can enjoy, you may as well not pull one at all.” Rarity told off Rainbow.

“Fine! If you want effort, then that's just what you'll get.” Rainbow angrily declared as she ran out of the den.

“I'm not sure she understood what we meant,” Bob spoke of his concerns.

“Not at all,” Nigel said in agreement.

Later that day at the Carousel Boutique, Rarity was with Sweetie Belle.

{Nigel moved the girls’ homes and places to Prehistoric Park to make them feel more at home back in Canterlot City}

"I know you're excited about the Filly Guide Cookie Drive," Rarity told her little sister, "but I still have to do a few finishing touches on your uniform." They both entered Rarity's workroom and blinked in surprise. The mannequin with Sweetie Belle's Filly Guide outfit was now perched on top of a giant cake. Sweetie Belle excitedly walked up to the cake and took a big bite out of it.

"Hmm, not bad," said Sweetie Belle. Rarity just looked at the cake skeptically. She then found a note sitting before the mannequin and went to read it.

"Huh," said Rarity as she read the note aloud, ""You asked for it"."

"What does it mean?" Sweetie Belle asked curiously.

"Hmm. I assume this is Dash's idea of a prank," Rarity answered, "which can only mean she's rigged some kind of booby trap to your Filly Guide uniform up there."

"So how do we get it down?" Sweetie Belle asked.

Rarity chuckled. "We don't. If Dash thinks I'm going to fall for whatever she's got in mind, she's got another thing coming. There are more uniforms where that one came from!"

Rarity then grabbed some fabric and went to work. But as she went to use the sewing machine…

SPLAT!

The sewing machine fell apart...and was actually another cake. Sweetie Belle leaned in and took a huge bite out of it.

"Hmm. The sewing machine cake is actually better than the cake cake," said Sweetie Belle. Rarity couldn't contain her temper after that.

"RAINBOW DASH!" Rarity screamed angrily. She and Sweetie Belle then heard laughter. There was Rainbow Dash outside of the window, laughing at them.

"Gotcha! Ha-ha!" said Rainbow, "How's that for effort?"

Rainbow then ran away as Rarity watched her run off. Rarity then glared at Sweetie Belle who was just innocently stuffing her face with more cake.

At the control center, Suzanne was chatting along with the staff about work at the park. Things were pretty quiet at first, but as soon as Nigel walked in, some of the workers started snickering. Nigel tried to ignore it at first, but then he started to get annoyed as the people in the control room, besides Suzanne, were now snickering behind his back.

"Alright, what's so funny?" Nigel demanded.

The workers then started laughing. Nigel glared as Suzanne walked towards him.

"I don't know what's so funny," said Suzanne firmly, "but that's no way to treat..."

Suzanne then noticed a sheet of paper was taped onto the zoologist’s back and pulled it off.

"Uh...Nigel," said Suzanne as she handed him the sheet of paper, "I think this is why they're snickering."

Nigel blinked when he saw what was on the sheet of paper:

On it was a poorly drawn picture of himself with a goofy grin on his face and above his head was only one word: Stinky!

It was then he heard a familiar-sounding laugh from a window. He turned to see Rainbow blowing a raspberry at him.

"You're going to get it!" Nigel remarked as he headed toward the front door. But when he opened…

KER-SPLAT!

Nigel got a bucket of shaved onions dumped on him. And I mean the strong smelly kind!

"Gotcha!" Rainbow taunted, "See ya later, Stinky!"

"Rainbow Dash!" Nigel furiously yelled.

Behind him, Suzanne and the rest of the workers all held their noses since Nigel smelled terrible due to the strong-smelling onions. They didn't waste time preparing their friend a bath. Unfortunately, it took a full hour before they managed to help him get the smell of onion out of his hair and clothes. And yes, they asked Rarity if they could use her perfume-scented shampoo and soaps too.

Late that night, Applejack and Bob were busy setting up various ropes, bells, and frying pans around AJ’s bedroom. Apple Bloom then peeked inside the room.

"What's all this, fellas?" Apple Bloom asked, "I thought you were gonna help me get ready for the Filly Guide Cookie Drive."

"Uh, yeah, sorry about that," said Applejack, "But Rainbow Dash has been on a prankin' tear, and you can never be too careful."

"I agree," muttered Bob, "Rainbow will pick just 'bout anybody for her pranks. And we're gonna be ready for her!"

"Do you think Dash is gonna try and prank you in your sleep?" Apple Bloom asked.

"Not if we have anythin' to say about it," said Applejack as she turned her lamp off and went to sleep with Bob for added protection, just in case that prankster wanted to strike.

Apple Bloom just said nothing and turned the hall light off as she headed to her bedroom.

The next morning, Applejack and Bob woke up with a start to find an Ice Age Unicorn staring right at them beside their bed.

"What the..?!" Applejack and Bob exclaimed when they noticed that their bed was now outside in the middle of the Elasmotherium paddock!

"Whoa!" Applejack yelped as she tried to climb out of bed, but tripped and fell face-first into some mud.

Rainbow laughed at her from behind the fences.

"Ha! Still think I'm lazy?" Rainbow remarked, "Gotcha!" She laughed harder and walked off.

"Ugh! Rainbow Dash!" Applejack and Bob grunted as Vlad snorted and trotted off beside the cowgirl.

Applejack, now coated from head to toe in mud, and Bob just sulked. It was beginning to look clear that nobody was safe from Rainbow's pranks.

A Prank Too Far

The next morning, at the bungalow, Nigel invited the poor saps who were victims of Dashie’s pranks over to see how to stop and deal with this problem once and for all.

“She placed my little sister’s uniform for the Cookie Drive onto the cake then made a sewing machine made out of cake where she tricked me into sewing using the cake machine.” Rarity complained.

“She pulled my bed out into the Elasmotherium pen even after Bob and I went through all of that trouble to ensure she couldn’t prank me even after my increased security,” Applejack complained as she sniffed her hair. “And my clothes and hair still stinks of mud and rhino logs.”

“Wow!” Twilight expressed in stunned amazement. “How did she even pull all of that even when you all kept your guard up?”

“I don’t know!” Applejack answered. “But now it’s time we taught Rainbow Dash a lesson because now she is taking this here pranking business too far!”

“Well, where’s Sunset? Did Rainbow get her too?” Bob wondered.

“She left to stay in Equestria for a while until this whole thing blows over. Said that she didn’t want to get involved.” Suzanne told the headkeeper.

“So what are you thinking?” Nigel wondered what revenge they had in mind.

“I was thinking we’d invite Rainbow Dash over to apologize to her but as she comes inside, we dump a bucket of rainbow paint all over her!” Rarity proposed.

“Don’t you think you're exaggerating, Rarity?” Pinkie questioned. "She's been pranking up a storm!"

"Did she get you, too?" Fluttershy asked. Pinkie laughed.

"Oh, yeah!" said Pinkie cheerfully, "She and Gummy both!"

Flashback

Just earlier that morning, Pinkie had gone to get something from her closet. When she opened the door, she found Rainbow and Gummy hanging upside down by their legs, or in Gummy’s case, his tail, inside.

"Boo!" Rainbow shouted.

"AAAAAAAAH!" Pinkie screamed and then giggled to herself.

End of Flashback

"They got me good," said Pinkie in a cool tone.

"Well, she needs to stop," Applejack snapped.

"Stop?" said Pinkie, "But pranks are so much fun!"

"Not for everybody, Pinkie," Nigel said sternly.

"And it doesn't seem like Dash is taking the time to find out who enjoys them and who doesn't," Twilight added sternly. The others all grumbled in agreement.

"Yeah." Bob agreed. "Plus, we don't like being in the dark on whether Dash is going to get us or not. Some of us need stability in our lives, you know?"

"Uh, since you and Dash share such an, uh, affinity for pranking," Rarity approached Pinkie and said, "we thought you might be able to get her to, um, uh... quit it!"

Pinkie took a glance at her friends’ faces and began to scratch the back of her head nervously. For once, she seemed to feel what all of them had been feeling about the plague of pranks that was uncertain to end. "Are you sure they're not funny?" She asked.

"No!" Everyone shouted in unison.

Pinkie sighed heavily and walked past them. "Alright, I'll go talk to her."

"Thank you." Rarity returned.

Once Pinkie seemed to reluctantly leave the premises, the rest looked at each other with the question of what they should do next.

"Should we wait for her to come back?" Fluttershy asked. "I really want to know what Rainbow Dash says. To be honest, I don't think Pinkie asking Rainbow to stop will get her to stop. You all know how Rainbow is."

"You're right." Twilight rubbed her chin in thought. "If Pinkie can just get to her stop then and there, that would be great. But if she refuses, then we'll just have to improvise. If she won't stop, then we'll need to make her stop. Give her a taste of her own medicine."

"What? You mean like prank her?" Nigel inquired. "But she's been pranking for ages now. I would think she knows all the tricks in the book."

"Just because you're an expert prankster doesn't mean you're exempted from basic psychology," Twilight responded wittily, causing them to look at her with confusion. "It's like this. If everybody you know was to start behaving in a certain way, your mind is sort of trained to follow that unnatural pattern. Let me make things a little clearer and use an example." She walked over to the box of cupcakes Pinkie delivered to Nigel and opened them up. "You're concerned that Rainbow Dash would become suspicious of any possible prank that is planned against her, right? Well, if you ordered a box of strawberry cupcakes, and all the cupcakes were strawberry except for one that was blueberry, you'd immediately think something was wrong, right?"

"Yeah…?" Bob returned, not quite understanding what she was getting at yet.

"Now, look at it this way: If all the cupcakes were blueberry, and one was strawberry, you'd likely begin questioning yourself about what kind of cupcakes you ordered. You'd probably start to think that you ordered blueberry cupcakes instead of strawberry, and that chance is even further increased if all the cupcakes were blueberry."

"…But isn't that why you have the receipt?" Nigel brought up.

"Forget the receipt!" Twilight shook her head. "I'm just using these cupcakes as an example. What I'm trying to say is that if one person was trying to convince you that something was a certain way you didn't remember it being, you'd be unlikely to believe, if everyone was trying to convince you, you're more likely to believe their story. Get what I'm saying?"

"Okay, the way you're explaining all this is kind of confusing, but I think what you're trying to say is that we should get everybody in on the prank. That way, it'd be harder for Rainbow Dash to figure out it's just a prank?" Nigel asked.

"Well, leaving out the psychology explanation and aspect of it, yeah, I guess you could say that," Twilight concluded.

"But, what's a convincing prank we can pull with everyone in Prehistoric Park?" Rarity asked.

As the gang placed some thought into answering that question, Pinkie Pie returned a short moment later with a rainbow-colored mouth and a box of cookies she continued to consume. Rarity immediately noticed this and pointed it out.

"Aren't those the cookies from the Filly Guide? How on Earth did you get a hold of them? They aren't supposed to be sold until tomorrow."

"Oh, these?" Pinkie continued chewing as she looked at the box on her hoof. "They're joke cookies Rainbow Dash is going to switch the Filly Guide cookies with. She thinks pranking everybody at once is the most hilarious thing ever, soo… it turns out I couldn't get her to stop." She frowned sadly, which was followed by another cookie being plopped into her mouth.

"You're telling me she's getting into my barn?!" Applejack yelled out. "That's where I'm keepin' the cookies until tomorrow!" Applejack now hopped out of her seat and began to storm out the front door. "Oh, I'm going to tell that dumb girl to think twice about switching those cookies or she'll be getting a mouthful of—"

"Wait!" Twilight suddenly stopped, causing Applejack to freeze at the door. "This isn't so bad actually!"

"What are you gettin' on about, Twilight?" Applejack turned, the aggravated frustration in her tensed face still burning strong.

"I'm saying that we can use this against her!" Twilight suggested. "She doesn't know that we know about her prank. We can make it backfire on her!"

"And how would we do that?" Suzanne questioned.

"Oh, I might have a few ideas…" Nigel rubbed his chin and looked back in thought mischievously.

The next day was the Filly Guide Cookie Drive. Rainbow quickly made her way inside Sugarcube Corner.

"Pinkie, what's the deal?" Rainbow called out as she headed inside, "I told you I needed your help switching out all the Filly Guide Scout cookies for the joke cookies. But when you didn't show, I had to do it all by myself!"

Rainbow then headed upstairs and saw that Pinkie was still in bed. Her coat was a sickly shade of pink and her mouth was completely rainbow-colored.

"Uh, Pinkie?" Rainbow asked as Pinkie coughed in reply. Rainbow chuckled as she walked up to the bed, "Wow, your face is still pretty rainbowed."

"Yeah," said Pinkie weakly, "I haven't really...*Cough*...been feeling well. And these joke cookies are the only thing that makes me feel better."

Pinkie then reached for another cookie but found her box was empty.

"You don't have anymore, do you?!" Pinkie asked as she lunged into Rainbow's face in desperation.

"Uh, no," Rainbow asked, feeling rather disturbed, and pushed Pinkie back, "I just told you. I used them all for the prank."

"Oh," said Pinkie, looking disappointed.

"Pretty soon, the CMCs will start selling them to everyone in Prehistoric Park," Rainbow gloated as she walked away from Pinkie's bed, "Ponies will open up their boxes and start eating, then all of their teeth will turn rainbow-colored, and they'll know it was me! It's gonna be so awesome! C'mon, you don't wanna miss it!"

Rainbow didn't resist hugging the ice cream stair post before she went over to Pinkie and pulled her blanket.

"Actually," Pinkie coughed, "I don't think I can even...stand up..." Pinkie then lunged into Rainbow's face.

"UNLESS YOU'VE GOT MORE COOKIES!" Pinkie said in a raspy voice.

"Aah!" Rainbow yelped, "On second thought, maybe you better stay here and rest."

"Yeah," Pinkie sighed as she turned away, "You're right. Sorry to miss out. I'm sure it's gonna be hilarious and Nigel won't fire you for it."

Rainbow just looked worried, but it was more over Pinkie's condition rather than Nigel possibly retaliating to fire her.

At Sweet Apple Acres, All three Cutie Mark Crusaders wore their Filly Guide Cookie Drive uniforms while Applejack, Bob, Rarity, and even Rainbow Dash gathered and put all of the cookies on the cart. Everything is set for selling the cookies.

Rainbow Dash smiled as she turned to the CMC, "All right, who's ready to sell some cookies?"

Three Cutie Mark Crusaders cried, "Me!"

"Look here, Rainbow Dash. I know you promised Scootaloo you'd help out," Bob said dryly while glaring at Rainbow Dash, "but I don't want none of your pranks ruinin' these lasses' night."

"I agree. And you don't want to upset Nigel." Rarity added, "You know how angry he can be."

"Look, I'll be with you the whole night so you can totally keep an eye on me." Rainbow Dash insisted.

"Come on, Applejack! Let's get started!" Apple Bloom insisted.

Scootaloo nodded, "Yeah! We've got a lot of ground to cover!"

"We wanna get everybody in Prehistoric Park!" Sweetie Belle added happily.

Bob chuckled, "The cookies won't sell to customers by themselves. Let's make the best out of it!”

As three Cutie Mark Crusaders carried the wagon of cookies, they headed off at once.

Rainbow Dash smiled as she turned to both Rarity and Applejack, "Come on! You heard her! Everybody in Prehistoric Park!"

As suspicious and concerned as Rarity, Bob, and Applejack are for their prankster friend, they have to agree with her that they have to help Cutie Mark Crusaders in selling the cookies. As the two sisters and head-keeper headed off, Rainbow Dash laughed softly while following them.