Skibidi Stories: Anon the Sigma and the Idol of Noscoper Boreas

by Onyx Vesper

Griffonstone: The New Era

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I was born with something inside of me that refuses to settle for average and I'm grateful for it,
I am a warrior,
a destroyer,
a force of pure violence.


Anon stares at the Golden shores of Griffonstone, seeing primitive fishing canoes on the water, he looked to the Skeleton companion Sunny Starscout had conjured up for him.

But as it was her first time using Conjuration magic her stat was at like level 35 and accidentally made the Skeleton be on the Autism Spectrum , he heard faint hoof steps behind him, then he heard Pipp speak, "Anon... What is the Skeleton doing here?"

Anon turned around and replied to her in a Skyrim Nord voice, "watch your tongue! You're speaking to Ulfric Stormcloak, the true High King!", he proceeds to pick up the Skeleton and throws it with such strength causing it to go Ballistic.

"Cmon Anon... Lets have some "alone time" Pipp says seductively, Anon replies with, "Silence wench... I do not wish to be horny anymore, I just want to be happy..." Then the Wise Mystical Tree song started playing as he speaks.


Eventually they arrive in Griffonstone, "Huh this place isn't so Different to Gaza back home" Anon said as Griffonian palace fucking exploded into smithereens as it was shot by a Narmer Murex, A Sentient troop transport ship before promptly disappearing back into the outer reaches of Space, Anon gathered the crew and headed inland.

They walked through with Pipp on Anon's back, "What in oblivion is that!?!" Anon said with General Tullius' voice as he saw Alduin the World eater burning the city, It was like the city of Senchal during the Second Era, the city was ridden with, destruction, poverty, disease and famine.

"Great what else could go wrong?" Anon said sounding pissed off, Anon the absolute clone on Mannimarco that he was showed the Griffons of Griffonstone his Altmer superiority by spitting onto the homeless griffons whenever they begged him for bits.

However he could only wish to be of the racially superior Altmeri blood as he was still just a regular human, They walked into some primitive Auditorium when they heard music blasting from within, "yo is that Glaze? Glaze as in The Wooden Toaster Glaze?" Anon said sounding surprised as Glaze has gone radio silent the times of Ancient Equestria, He was the Producer of the Top 10 pony hits of all time Nightmare Night and I'm An Ass Hunter Gimme That Booty.

Anon proceeds to waltz on stage and capture Glaze in a Pokeball.

"Another fine addition to my collection" Anon said before breaking into a coughing fit. then Anon proceeds to fall into a chasm causing Pipp to jump off his back, he see's a glimmering object and a Griffon Skeleton, He picks up the golden object and pockets it, he also fishes out the fallen griffons corpse from the chasm pulling it out the chasm, He asks the nearby griffons for a room to conduct his Extremely unethical experiments in creating the perfect Griffon.


Several weeks later, Anon imbues the corpse with the heart of Lorkhan and several mechanical components, Just as the Omnissiah intended there was one thing to do for the project to be complete, Anon started chanting.

"From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine. Your kind cling to your flesh, as though it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call the temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal…"

Anon said wearing his Mannimarco robes as he used his staff to channel his inner necromancer powers into the corpse, after a few tries the corpse reanimates, an explosion follows as all of the creatures attacking Griffonstone are vaporised and imbued into the corpse, "Welcome back... ~~Gilda~~, Anon corrects himself naming the female Griffon Grover Boreas II, No-scoper of Griffonstone, Sigma of the Griffish isles.

He presents his foul creation to the Citizens of Griffonstone, and they gladly accept the return of the Rightful King? Queen? Only the Nine Divines know, Gilda looks at Anon before speaking "I am grateful to take the mantle of responsibility also Anon? What the actual fuck have you done to me?" Suddenly Anon and Gildatron morph into two severely obese pigs and have the most devious monologue known to Man, Mer and Pony.


After a while Anon & Co have returned back to Maretime Bay, where Anon took two hours to run off to Opaline's palace just to bitch slap her but also Misty just to run all the back which took another two hours, Anon was just built different like that.

Anon returned to the Crystal bright house and saw the mares watching a movie, "Anon! come watch the movie with us!" Pipp begged, but it was futile, Anon was not going to watch the movie, But there was one thing that he knew for certain, That the movie they were watching was absolute Gen Alpha brainrot, "Silence wench! do not have me indulge in activities of the Lesser Beings, I have been Personally trained in the arts of the Skibidi, The Sigma and the Holy Gooner, Do not underestimate my Divinity young Padawan!" Anon bellowed with all his might.

Anon then gets the holy book out and starts reading, "Book of Gooning Revelation 20:1:Savage, I am Anon Ur, The shatmat and Summoner of crows, I am the rightful heir to the throne of Equestria, We shall Drive out the False Equine Alicorns from Morrowquestria and bring glory to House Anon..." Anon said walking away with a certain golden mask now on his head.

"What was that about?" Sunny Starscout asked, "I have no idea, Probably one of his weird fanfictions he's writing, He's been writing those lately," Pipp Petals replies to the now confused Sunny Starscout.