Fizzy

by Electrix

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Original Character
Length: 1207

Rainbow Dash stumbles upon a bar that doesn't serve alcohol.

Rainbow Dash has been hankering for some authentic Apple-Family made cider. But, it's not cider season. So Rainbow sets out to find a bar that serves Apple Family apple cider. There's just one problem:

The cider wasn't fizzy.

Published 2024-08-27 03:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-08-27 03:00:00 UTC

"Why is it flat?"

Ponyville was quiet and calm, until a certain permafrost Pegasus zoomed through Ponyville at lightning speeds, with an odd, cheerful music playing in the background while she flew.

Rainbow Dash was craving Applejack's apple cider, but unfortunately for Rainbow Dash, it wasn't cider season just yet. It was creeping around the corner, but Dash simply couldn't wait.

She had asked around Ponyville, but nopony had any flavor of cider; whether it be on hoof or nearby. Many others may have given up already, but Rainbow Dash wasn't only loyal to others, but to herself too.

So, she turned to the last pony she could've thought of.

Rainbow Dash zipped and zig-zagged throughout Ponyville, gaining multiple complaints from ponies along the streets, but the only thing Rainbow Dash cared about right now was getting at least a drop of apple cider. She flew up to Pinkie Pie's window, and knocked exactly three times.

After waiting rather impatiently for 4 minutes, Rainbow Dash was ready to high-tail it out of there, almost ready to give up, and head back home in defeat, unable to get one drop of that cider she oh, so, adored.

Right up when she was about to leave, Dash turned around, faced with a smiling Pinkie Pie floating in mid-air in front of her. Rainbow was about to scream, but was stopped by Pinkie's hoof being abruptly forced into her muzzle.

"Lemme guess; you're craving some apple family cider reeally badly, but you couldn't find anypony who had any in storage so you came to me?"

Rainbow Dash blinked once, then blinked twice.

"What? Did I lie?" Pinkie asked smugly.

"I still have no idea how you do that."

"Neither do I," Pinkie paused. "Anyway, if it's cider you're looking for, you're outta luck. Sorry Dashie!" Pinkie sheepishly grinned.

Rainbow Dash pouted. "Not even one bottle?"

"Nnnope!" Pinkie paused again, as she thought for a moment, tapping her hoof to her chin; then, out of nowhere, a light-bulb illuminated over Pinkie's head. "There is a bar just a few blocks around the corner, maybe check there! I heard they sell cider there!"

Rainbow lit up at the new information passed onto her. "That is so awesome! Thanks Pinkie Pie!" Rainbow dashed away, while Pinkie smiled happily, waving goodbye.

After Rainbow Dash was a block away, Pinkie snickered as she ominously floated backwards into her room, rubbing her hooves together, resembling a potential villain. the window mysteriously closed behind her as she put on a fake black mustache.

Rainbow Dash zig-zagged once more through Ponyville, earning more complaints from local citizens. She twisted and turned in the streets, before coming to a screeching halt in front of the bar that Pinkie Pie mentioned to her earlier.

The sign read, in big, bold, deep blue words:

LAGOON LOUNGE

Rainbow smirked as she pushed open the large double doors, that led immediately to a second door with two security stallions waiting outside.

"ID please," the guard on the left side demanded.

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes as she pulled her ID out of her wing pocket, and showed it to the left guard. "Proceed." the right guard stepped aside as Rainbow trotted through the second set of doors, she was greeted with a tip of the hat from a guest, or a gentle smile from a bartender or two.

Wow, this place is actually pretty cool, Rainbow thought to herself.

Dash sat down at the bar, eager to drink some amazing apple cider that was curated by Applejack and the apple family.

"Hey, there! Name's Honeycomb; what can I get'cha this fine evening?" They put their arm up on the counter where Rainbow Dash was sitting, an intrigued eyebrow raised.

"Can I get an apple cider?" Rainbow smiled as she puffed out her wings.

"Sure thing!" Honeycomb came back with an apple cider the length of Rainbow Dash's forearm.

Rainbow looked at her cider. It looked fine, but there was just one problem:

The cider wasn't fizzy.

Rainbow Dash just shrugged. It must be pre-made, Rainbow thought. She took one sip of the cider and almost puked from the lack of crispness in the cider.

"What the hell is this? Why isn't the cider crispy?!" Rainbow wailed.

At the very least, two or three ponies stopped what they were doing to look at Rainbow Dash, at the most, the entire building.

Honeycomb deadpanned as Rainbow Dash raised her eyebrow. "Well? I expected it to be fizzy and crispy!"

"If the cider doesn't live up to your expectations, you can pay and leave."

"But why isn't crispy, and why is it not fizzy?" Rainbow frowned. "Just tell me why it's not the way it should be!"

"If you wanna know why it isn't 'crispy' or 'fizzy', it's because it's not made with alcohol. Happy?" Honeycomb and the rest of the building went back to what they were doing, completely disregarding what just happened.

"No alcohol? No alcohol?" Rainbow's jaw was left completely open, before closing it back due to her mouth becoming drier and drier by the second. "But the alcohol is what makes or breaks cider!" Dash waved her forelegs around in the air to emphasize her point a bit better (which she ultimately failed to do so).

"Tough nuts. We don't make cider with alcohol, and we never have. That's just the way we've operated." Honeycomb cleaned a dirty glass cup shaped like an octagon, walked over to a cupboard and gently placed the cup down.

"How can you not make cider with alcohol? It's, like, the main ingredient!" Rainbow protested.

"Look, if you wanna file a complaint take it up with the boss. This is not my problem anymore."

"Maybe i will take it up with 'the boss'!" Rainbow tossed some bits on the counter in front of Honeycomb, and went to the very clearly marked 'Boss's office'.

She opened the door, only to find, once more, Honeycomb sitting in a big corporate chair, writing some very 'important' stuff. "Oh, it's you again. why did i not expect this..?"

"Yeah, so i'm also the boss. What's your query and/or complaint?"

"You know my complaint!" Rainbow snarled.

"For the sake of quality customer service, I just need you to state your issue, and I can possibly resolve it."

Dash groaned, but spoke anyway. "Your 'apple ciders' are not crispy or fizzy. The lack of both makes it gag-worthy."

"Well, of course, you could ask to add alcohol into the drink--"

Before honeycomb could finish their sentence, Rainbow Dash triumphantly smirked and shouted "HA!".

"--If this wasn't an alcohol free establishment." Honeycomb smirked back, as Rainbow Dash's fell.

Rainbow's jaw dropped once more, and Honeycomb walked over and closed it. "Listen, I'm sorry, but we don't serve alcohol here, as this is a minor-safe environment."

"What 'minors' are coming here?" Rainbow raised an eyebrow.

"I feel like we're getting off topic here." Honeycomb sighed. "Look, if you're that upset why don't you stage a protest or whatever?"

"A protest, huh?" Rainbow Dash rubbed her hooves together and smirked.

...

This is NOT going to end well..

Author's Note

Based on my unnecessary anger because my soda wasn't crisp :facehoof: