Pipp groaned as she walked around in the throne room, grumbling to herself and sighing every minute. Obviously feeling very inconvenienced about something that had just happened. Zoom and Thunder, Haven’s two favourite guards were present, unsure what was making the princess so upset. But they knew from experience it was just another over-the-top meltdown, she'd be fine in the end. However, the former was a little irritated by her squealing and exclamation of random noises. The latter, was a little concerned, a little less from her first few meltdowns he witnessed. But whatever it was that upset her appeared to have been really important to her.

Haven was busy taking an important phone call, seemingly not bothered by Pipp’s upset state. Not in a mean way, of course. But she knew whatever Pipp was whining about wasn’t something she could help with at the moment, or at least not as important as whatever she needed tp do. Besides, she was basically a grown mare now. She needs to fix things herself. Starting with this inconvenience situation that apparently ‘ruined’ her livestream. The two guards groaned a little as the young princess cried out loud in agony, like someone just pulled a few of her feathers out her wings. They may be used to these meltdowns, but they were not enjoying being the ones to get the earful of drama she had to belt up.

“Why today!?” She whined, making a dramatic fainting pose onto a cushion she kicked into the throne room earlier. She then flailed her hooves about in a dramatic way before looking back her phone. “Why not tomorrow or the day after- or any day after today!?” The two guards looked at each other. Finally after thirty minutes of squealing, grumbling and stomping around the place, she did something else. But she was still complaining. So they decided to at least get a stop to this. Her meltdowns were rare, thankfully.

”Anything we can help you with, your highness?” Zoom asked, trying to not sound annoyed by her constant whining noises and repeated words. It was clear she had enough after the thirty minutes of her complaining. It was thirty minutes and neither had any idea what she was whining about. For all she knew, maybe a popular musician retired, or the new trending game she was streaming decided to delete itself.

“Are you okay?” Asked Thunder. Who was handling this as well as Zoom was… Which was not well at all.

”It’s terrible!” Cried Pipp as she jumped up and on all fours in such a way it was like a cartoon character, Haven having to leave the throne room for a quieter area for her important business on the phone and paperwork. Yep, Pipp was being that loud! “It’s horrible! I was about to do a makeup tutorial on somepony but they cancelled last minute!”

“Of course.” Zoom muttered under her breath. That pony, the one Pipp was talking about for weeks. Her name was Twinkle Polish, which was honestly a little on the cheesy side, but whatever, it wasn't her fault cheesy names were a trend when she was born. Twinkle was a famous designer who was going to do a collaboration with her in the palace. It was so anticipated that ponies were talking about it in the town. But being the busy and popular pony Twinkle Polish was, being one of the top stylists in Zephyr Heights. She ended up being too busy and having the cancel for whatever reason she did. Zoom had a gut feeling something was going to happen, so she was going to keep a stern eye on the guest. But now she didn’t have to, but maybe she would have preferred that if it meant no earful...

“Perhaps Queen Haven or your sister can help.” Thunder suggested in his voice as Pipp began typing a note out to her fans. He knew Pipp knew Twinkle since they were foals, they hung out pretty often. But he always felt something was off about her, too. But didn’t know what.

”She’s too busy, and Zipp is nowhere to be found!” Pipp exclaimed. “It’s too late to ask anyone else! It has to start in ten minutes! If I can’t at least find a replacement- My fans will be so disappointed! They already are, but-” She exclaimed then paused, looking at Zoom. Gazing at her for a few seconds till she started to grow confused at being stared at so intensively. “Hey, you aren’t busy right now, are you?”

”My break starts in an hour your highness. Why do you ask?” Zoom asked, hoping this wasn’t going anywhere… Why was she asking this? Well, hopefully, she was overacting because she was not going to lie to the princess!

”Great!” She jumped up with a large desperate smile. Getting right up to her and grinning as she stood right in front of her with a large smile. “As princess, I have a request I may ask of you!”

“Of course, your highness. What’s your request?” Zoom tried not to sound nervous at the incoming request. Why was this all feeling so forboding?

”Well, you are currently the only mare available to me at the moment. So, I want you to finish your current duty and come with me!” She ordered, pointing right at her face, looking as if she was going to boop her.

Zoom looked slightly confused but remained with her stance she usually does when standing in place. She tried to keep a straight face. Wondering how on earth- she a royal guard was going to help Pipp- a princess, with a makeup video tutorial thing. There would only be one reason why she’d have a big part of it, she thought. That would likely mean she’d have to sit there and be her ‘dummy.’ “I’d love to help your highness but-“

”No way out! Princess request C’mon!” She said, grabbing Zoom by the foreleg and pulling her out her position, causing her to faceplant the ground before she was dragged down the hall.Thunder was shocked and had no time to react before she was gone, he just watched on with confusion, he was now alone and was speechless at what he had just witnesses. Who knew Pipp was so strong?

Eventually, she was dragging her upside down through the hall. Her wings fluttered, and hind legs kicked as she flailed in surprise at this while thing. Being dragged down the hall by a princess what not something she was expecting. Pipp was stronger than she looked! She was dumbfounded as the pegasus dragged her all the way down the hall. “Y-your highness!” She exclaimed, flabbergasted.“Dragging isn’t necessary. I can walk on my own!” Queen Haven had taken a peek out of the room she was in to see what the shouting was about, smirking slightly as she got a glimpse of poor Zoom dramatically flailing as she got dragged. Letting out a yelp when they turned a corner.

Once in Pipp’s room, she got up and dusted herself off and shook her ruffled feathers back in shape. Looking rather displeased as she looked round the room. Seeing a fancy vanity up against the wall, with a large cushioned chair right in front of it. “Ugh! What did you need?” She asked, hoping that spot was not meant for her, but she was being too hopeful. It was already heavily implied she’d be taking Twinkle’s place for the make up the tutorial. Now she was a little annoyed at Twinkle for cancelling, adding to her distrust for her, but maybe it was an emergencancy of some sort, so maybe she shouldn't judge.

“I need you to sit in that chair so the make up tutorial can happen!” Pipp smiled. Not noticing her let out a soft groan.

”M-me?” Zoom paused and gulped, wanting to have another shot of getting out of this. “Your highness, are you sure that you want me to be your muse?” She asked. “I’m not really the most make-up knowledgeable pony out there…”

“You don’t need to be!” Pipp exclaimed with joy as she led Zoom to the chair, not bothering to mentioning the odd choice of word. “You just need to sit still and let me do my work.”

”If you say so, your highness…” Zoom said in an unsure voice, looking a little uneasy about being her muse-or whatever you call them. But she was prepared to serve the princess with whatever she asked. This was something the requested, after all. As Pipp set up her phone she climbed into the chair. Curling her tail up next to her as she sat on her rump, getting comfortable. One thing she knew about these things, they took ages. So she'd be here for a while.

“Okay Pippsqueaks! The make up tutorial you’ve been waiting for!” Pipp exclaimed as she spoke to the phone. “Unfortunately, as I said about ten minutes ago. There has been a change of plans and the pony I hired couldn’t come today! But I managed to get another pony who was completely available!” She said before pointing the camera at Zoom. “Say hello, Zoom!”

”uh-“ Zoom opened her mouth she felt frozen in place as butterflies happened in her tummy. She gulped, feeling a little nervous as she wasn’t the biggest fan of being on camera. Absolutely not one of Pipp’s things. She wasn’t too certain on what to say here, but judging what Pipp said, her first thing was simple and she already messed up by freezing! Not a good look at all, who would want to be protected by a royal guard scared of being on camera!? She scolded herself for freezing up and finally spoke. “Hello?” She said softly as the phone was put down in a holder and the screen facing her. She could see herself in the screen and see some of the comments.

“What a surprise!” Said one comment. Pretty normal reaction she assumed, they would have been expecting somepony else.

”I think I got scolded by this guard once for stealing from a store…” Said another comment that made Zoom roll her eyes. She scolded and caught many ponies in her years of being a guard, so she couldn’t really pinpoint who this one was since it could have been somepony a few months ago, or a few years ago. But it was intriguing that they remembered which guard scolded them anyway, she thought most ponies would forget most details. Well, her being one of the only two blue ponies that worked in the guard might have helped, too… Pipp started to speak again as she brought in a trolly full of stuff.

”So Pippsqueaks! The first thing you’d want to do is remove any accessories that might get in the way.”

Zoom gazed at Pipp, listening to what she was saying just before she got the hint! She was about to take her helmet off by herself. But she was caught off guard when Pipp suddenly yanked it off. “Hey!” She exclaimed in shock when she carelessy threw it across the room onto some pillows on her bed. “Y-your highness. We are expected to handle our gear with care.” She informed her, a little off guard and flabbergasted by the sudden yank and throw, raising her voice as a result.

”Relax Zoom! It was a soft landing!” She dismissed her concerns, knowing she was more shocked and surprised, so she wasn’t shouting at her. But she was a bit shocked at her concern, she didn’t think any guard was that worried about taking care of their stuff and just threw them down when done for the day or something. Besides, if a stallion tossing his on the floor a week ago didn’t damage it, throwing it on the bed should be okay, right? Her reaction made Zoom sigh a bit as she pondered why it had to be her that ended up here. She knew at least two or three other guards who wouldn’t mind this. So why couldn’t she ask them? Her ears flinched as Pipp went through her short, messy mane. “When was the last time you brushed?”

”Your highness, I brush every morning and night. If you wish for a mare with longer hair, there’s a few I can suggest.” She asked. Hiding her desperate attempt at backing out of this. She’d rather do a patrol in the mountain side, sure it was boring. But Thunder sure was funny when he’d fall in the small pond from time to time. It kept happening. Or when walking at the precise moment, he’d walk past a unicorn-shaped shadow and get scared by it, only to realise it was a pile of rocks. That stopped after a few weeks, but it was hard to not smile about it.

”We already started, besides, mares can rock short hair like yours! Just needs a brush!” She said, humming as she grabbed a brush and started brushing her mane. Spraying it with some sort of spray, seemingly to make it easier.

”Goodbye helmet hair.” A comment said with a smiley emoji, making Zoom roll her eyes again. Pulling her serious expression. Until her face turned to confusion ay the next comment.

“Sayonara! Helmet hair! Greetings beautiful mane! Let it down, mare!” A random comment said in bold. Making Zoom’s face turn to confusion as her muzzle screwed up with slight cringe.

“The earth-“ She said, about to use ‘earth pony’ as a rude word, but cathing herself. “-worm does say-oh-nara mean?” She asked, getting no answers but getting distracted by another moment soon after. Who had coloured text, unlike everyone else. Which wasn’t a concern or anything, ponies usually only used coloured text for fun and laughs and rarely made their entire comment a single colour.

”Why is Pipp green here? Did I miss something?”

Zoom gazed at the comment and back at Pipp. Who was very well pink, not green, she looked back at the screen with a puzzled expression. Deciding to respond to it, no one said she couldn’t. Besides, it was clear this one was trying to spread misinformation about royalty. Unless it was some sort of inside joke of some sort. “She’s pink, Leafrabbit-One…” She said bluntly. Then suddenly a long comment really caught her eye.

”This guard will sure have a story to tell. Not every day you get a free makeover from who you protect.” It wasn’t really a big deal she thought. She hoped the guards wouldn’t be so loud or annoying about it. The stallions tended to be noisy when off guard. She wasn’t worried about ponies talking about it. She just didn’t want to be the centre of attention when they did. She was snapped out of her thoughts with a sharp, painful yank.

”Sorry, Zoops.” Pipp apologised. Zoom let out a huff as she sat there, not pleased with the nickname but not saying anything. A guard being upset by a simple nickname might be a bad look, besides at least this one wasn’t as bad as other nicknames she gets, thanks to Thunder. But she was still wondering why she had to agree to this. Naturally she had to listen to orders from the queen and most orders by the princesses, but was this really one of them?

“That mare is a lovely shade of blue, so soft.” A comment said with a heart. Zoom squinting slightly as she glared at it, ears down and muzzle slightly scrunched up. She was a little confused at that comment on why they would say that. Sure they meant it was a compliment, for all she knew, maybe they liked blue in general. But she didn’t really like being called lovely or soft…

”Uh hello? Pipp is green? On top of that, the entire room is blue! I thought her room was gold!”

”She looks so adorable when she’s mad.” Another comment said. She rolled her eyes slightly as her ears shot back. It was also pretty weird to be in the palace without wearing her helmet, she couldn’t help but feel a little naked at the moment.

”First you wash any excess dirt off, or sweat! Guards can get pretty sweaty sometimes when performing harder jobs in the sun- or- a lot of jobs that isn’t standing around. Worse in summer!” Pipp exclaimed as she brought out a soaked towel from the trolley. “Zoom here might as well smell like…” She said begore taking a quick wiff, she couldn’t help but pull a ‘what the heck, dude?’ Type face as she did do. “Oh!” Pipp exclaimed with a pleasant smile. “Is that my newest Deep forest summer soap?!” She exclaimed with a generous smile, Zoom looking like she was caught. It smelt like the trees and the leaves in the summertime just after it rained a bit.

”I belive so. Your soap is pretty nice, your highness.”

”Aww, we got a fan!” Pipp exclaimed with happiness, hugging Zoom who was shocked and then glanced at her. Using Pipp’s soap wasn’t a huge deal. At least half the guard, or more, used her soap. It was good quality, available and she made more smells than flowers and plants. She made soaps based on the smell of other things, too, like burning wood or fresh muffin. It was rare to see such variety. Then Pipp grabbed a towel and aggressively wiped off any excess water before she grabbed a pink tube of cream. “Now the next thing you need to do dab on some cream!” She said before putting blobs on her face, who scrunched up her muzzle at the smell. She gave a little giggle, “Appears somepony doesn’t like the smell.”

”It’s not horrible, your highness-“ Zoom said, trying to make it seem better than it was. It wouldn’t smell terrible to anyone who liked the combo of eucalyptus and olive oil. Also, for all she knew, perhaps this cream never intended to smell nice, judging by Pipp’s remark.

“Now, this cream is just to freshen up and hydrate your fur and skin. It doesn’t take long to rub in and vanish…” She said, scowling at Zoom slightly as she just sat there. “If you rub it in…” She said giving her a little nudge.

”Oh? Right.” Zoom said before rubbing and spreading it across her face as requested. Getting the cream all over her hooves in the process. Suddenly she felt a sudden burning pain in her eye, and she started to squint a but as it teared up. She quickly wiped her eye with her leg.

“Just don’t get any on your eye.” Pipp warned, receiving a glance from Zoom, who was displeased with the late warning. Would have been nice to know earlier.

”Thank’s for the warning.” She snarled slightly. Then she realised something; ponies are certain to belive face cream is now a guard’s weakness or something if they see it stinging her eyes. The grief this could cause was unimaginable! Face cream being weaponised would be one of the worst things to happen in Zephyr Heights! She couldn’t let is risk of that happening go by. “It doesn't hurt me, your highness. Just got an… uh…” She froze as she tried to make an excuse. “unexpected texture… That feels a little funny, but harmless.” She said, gazing at the comments, seeing a particular pony in the comments repeat a question. It was clear Pipp wasn't reading the comments at the moment because she would have responded to it.

”Okay, but why is Pipp green?”

”You’re welcome!” Pipp sung, ignoring the excuse she made, believing she was just providing a silly excuse she didn’t mean for the video or something. She started getting ready to explain the next step as Zoom grabbed a tissue and washed her eye off screen and rub the rest of the cream in.

“The next step takes a while. But all you need to a facial mask, or facial mud and freshly slice cucumbers.” Pipp exclaimed.

“Oh no.” Zoom’s voice was heard as a response on knowing where this was heading… But to make thing worse. That commenting pony that was getting on her nerves was still there. Were they not sick and tired yet since they were getting ignored besides that one time?

”I may not understand what’s going on, but I like your new blue tiara Pipp. But what made you swap that from the golden one? Some sort of upcoming event?”

Author's Note

Random story fact:

This one-shot was foreshadowed/inspired a line from “A Little Froggy Haven” (Same author, otherwise I’d be giving credit for the idea in the description)

“Besides, even tho she and Pipp had times where they had not agreed on… Well. Things. Like the time she had to test hoof polish and other crazy ‘styling’ stuff when somepony had to cancel their visit one day.

It took way too long to wash that daisy and raspberry perfume from herself… Or get that glitter out her mane…”