The Weasel Tax

by NnoDragonEclipse

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Mayor Mare, My Little Pony Comic, Comedy
Length: 1767

Taxes, everypony hates them even the ones in charge.

Mayor Mare is having a long day. Tax forms keep rolling in and are now flooding her office. It couldn't get any worse right? A little furry critter seems to think so.

Created for the Iron author at Everfree Northwest in 2 hours. The prompts Smile, Weasel and Gubernatorial. It didn't win any awards but I had fun making it.

Went back and did some editing after the fact.

Published 2024-08-28 17:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-08-28 17:10:01 UTC

If Only Taxes Were Easy

If Only Taxes Were Easy

*Dink*

The ink clinked as the quill was put down. It's been a long day. All these papers flooded the once pristine oak room. I always made a point to keep this room clean but when it came to this season it was an inevitable flood of paper. Tax season. Oh the Equinanity. Such a pain in my flank every year. If anything it has gotten worse with the princess living here. Either that be from tourism or ponies moving in, it means more for the poor little mare stuck in office.

I’d hope the governor's office will do all the checking. It would be easier for them to approve all these tax forms. Unfortunately my office was the victim. The once great clean office had papers scattered about. The shelves and filing cabinets were run through and had hastily thrown in papers in them. I swear there is one paper on the ceiling fan that keeps making a whooshing sound.

"Miss Mayor Mare, I have more forms here for us to check," Tadwell said. I gave a loud sigh. The reddish brown Stallion didn't look so pleased, "Mayor Mare it's almost done. We still have district thirteen left."

I could feel his grin as I stared down at the papers. He's right but that's still about three hours of work left. Glancing up at the old grandfather clock that was given to me it read eight thirty seven at night. I've been here since five in the morning with my fellow co-workers stuck writing and checking for mistakes in ponies tax forms. It was all tiring, my mouth ached from all the writing. My hooves were cramped and my eyes were drowsy.

Looking up at Tadwell he wasn't in much good shape either. His Hooves were shaking, his hair frizzled and his eyes were low underneath his glasses. He still kept his smile though. I like him. He was a hard worker when he put his mind to it.

"Tadwell, thank you. Can you tell the others they can go home now. I don't want them falling asleep at their desks again. Thank you," I asked. I like them too much to put them through another all-nighter. We have too many of those as it is with all the disasters that are thrown our way. Though Tadwell looked confused.

"Are you sure, we still have a mountain of paperwork to go through," Tadwell explained with a head tilt. Such a sweetheart he is.

"Yes I'm sure, you can all go home now. It's been a long day and I won't keep you here any longer. Now Shoo," I motioned with my hooves for him to leave. I could see him smile and shake his head at the gesture.

"All right I'll tell them, but you get some sleep. I don't want to find you asleep at your desk again," Tadwell teased. I rolled my eyes at the thought. That week was a week in Tartarus with how much went on. Three disasters and a census. Oh my poor coffee machine was working around the clock to get the paperwork done in time. It only survived till the fourth day when a manticore slammed into it.

Tadwell slowly slipped out of the room with a small click as the door closed. He was always so nice as to not slam my door. Soon I was left alone in my office with only the sound of my pen and the paperwork to keep me company. Getting up from my battered chair I moved over to my new coffee machine. I tried to fill my cup but the pot was empty.

I groaned. Of course it had to be this way. Looking in the cabinet for anything more that can create the sweet elixir of life proved unfruitful. Another groan. Going back to my chair without my bounty felt like I was walking the plank. Never before have I felt so defeated. Well there was that one time in high school. Blegh stop thinking about that.

With a slump, I threw myself onto my chair and continued working. I can feel my eyes fail me as things blurred until I blinked my eyes. My head nodded back and forth, messing up my writing a few times.

I put my pen down and cover my head with my hooves. I was so exhausted. It has been four whole days of tax forms flooding in and out as corrections were made. I gave out a sigh. I just sat there in silence for a bit. Maybe I can rest my eyes for a bit. It will only be a minute before I can continue.

I woke up with a small shake and a familiar voice speaking to me, "You alright miss Mayor?"

Looking up I saw Tadwell right in front me with a concerned look on his face. I swear I sent him home not too long ago. Looking over at the clock it read it was already eleven o'clock in the morning. How could I sleep this late!? With a quick jolt I stood up, how could I be so foalish? I need to get back to work. Quickly running over to the filing cabinets I search for the next documents to correct.

I was now in a rush to finish what I started. Some of the papers I had last night were gone. Where did they go?

"Miss Mayor, ugh some of the papers were already transferred to some of the others. You don't have to rush anyways, we still have a few days before we have to submit all the papers. Though ugh I may have to ask for your help with something," Tadwell squeaked. Looking over to him I saw that he was in a much better state than he was last night. Though his mane was still frazzled, it was expected from a single stallion of his age. He needs to get a mare to spruce him up one of these days.

Though something was different today. He had a black lump on his back, it looked like a pet carrier of some kind. His expression changed too. He gave me an embarrassed smile. He did something stupid I just know it.

"It's not what you think, I was talking to Flutters-" He started.

"What did you get?" I asked calmly. I can see his uneasiness as he shifted his hooves.

"Welllllllll," He dragged out, "I have a weasel. His name is Willy."

I raised my eyebrow at him. I never took him to be an animal person. I could hear the skittering of the small little creature inside the travel carrier. I motioned with my hoof for him to continue.

"Okay so, I was talking with Fluttershy or more like trying to talk or umm," He stuttered, "I need some help, she convinced me into adopting Willy here and gave me a bunch of tips on how to take care of him, but honestly I have no idea what I'm doing."

He looked up to me with puppy dog eyes. I only grinned and shook my head in response. Of course he would do anything to grab her attention. I guess this was the only way in his mind to impress her. Poor guy.

"How much have you prepared for this?" I asked him. His back straightened at the question and his uneasy smile still lingered.

"Umm, I have asked Twilight for a book on weasels and on how to keep them," Tadwell answered, "I also bought a play pen, toys and every essential I need."

He stared at me with the widest grin imaginable. I was confused now, "why come to me then?"

"Well I wanted to ask if I can keep watch of him in town hall? Ugh, at work," He asked shyly, his hooves were slightly tapping nervously.

I just stared at him flatly. Was he serious? He was trying to pull his puppy dog eyes upon me again. Ugh I hate him when he does that. His eyes were filled with stars and his lip began to quiver.

"Please miss Mayor. Willy won't interfere with my work I swear to you by Celestia's crown," he promised. He even bowed.

"Fine, Just make sure he doesn't mess up any of the papers. We're already swamped and we don't need to fall behind," I said. I raised my head as if I was asserting my authority but in reality it was to hide my grin. Poor foal got himself stuck in a sticky situation, "Now get back to work, I need all hooves on deck right now."

"Yes Ma'am!" Tadwell exclaimed. With a spring in his step he walked out the door, remembering to close the door gently.

Now it's back to the tedious work of bureaucracy. Sitting back at my chair to restart the process all over again. Ink to pen, pen to paper and repeat. The papers passed on by. Some were sent back, some sent to the governor's office. It's all the same.

*Crash*

With a Jolt I snapped my head to the door. It was still shut but I can now hear yelling from beyond it. I slowly got up from my chair and with a slow stride I moved to the door. Alright Mayor Mare, put your steel face on and fixed the commotion. Opening the door I saw a bureaucratic nightmare.

There were papers thrown everywhere, cabinets tipped over and I can see some of my staff running around like headless chickens. The screams and yells did not cease, as they were screamed in terror. I could see Tadwell galloping around as it looked like he was chasing something. His hoof slipped onto a piece of paper and he fell hard onto the ground with a groan.

I shook my head, of course. I started my trot over to him to help him up as he groaned on the ground. Hooking my hoof underneath his elbow I holstered him up and gave him a deep stare.

"Ugh, Mayor Mare, what are you doing here?" He asked. I just stared at him and motioned my hoof towards the mess he made. He grimaced at the sight, "Well you see, ugh, Willy escaped his pen."

His embarrassed grin spook volumes. The papers were torn up and shredded. What's left of the papers were thrown about and it will take days just to reorganize them again.

I just sighed and shook my head. This was going to be a long tax season indeed.