Pick Your Perspective: Between a Cowgirl and a Diva

Point of View: You're Married to Neither Applejack nor Adagio Dazzle

You stretched out in your seat and slid down it just a little. It was a quiet day, in a quiet buffet, in a quiet town, and there was nothing to do except let the coffee and food gradually wake you. You had nothing better to do.

You looked around the mostly empty restaurant. There were quite a few women here today, each with a different hair colour and style; you eventually noticed two were in a motherly way. They didn’t notice you looking at them with your peripheral vision, so you continued to watch out of boredom while you lazily picked at your food. They soon enough noticed each other and started talking, but you weren’t really paying attention to their words. They seemed to be arguing about something, and their louder voices made it much harder to ignore them. It got so heated they literally bumped into each other, and you decided to turn your head to get a better look at them, not that they’d notice with how each was glaring at the other. They were both standing that way pregnant women do, with their hands behind their backs, making them jut outward quite a bit. The blonde moved her hand to stick a finger out at the other, and started talking again. They were arguing about a piece of cake, it seemed, and you got an idea. It was a bad idea to interfere, but you were bored enough to do it anyway. You stood up and walked towards them, clearing your throat to get their attention after you drank in the sight of them a little better first.

“Ladies, allow me to settle this matter in a fair way.” You moved your hand back-and-forth, and they stepped back so you could step inbetween them. You leaned over a little to get at the slice of cake more easily, and for no other reason. With the plate in your hand, you turned around and went back to your table. There was a large mirror that allowed you to see the looks on their faces: the blonde was staring at you, scowling with her mouth open; the redhead or whatever was just glaring like she’d glared at the blonde.

You sat back down and took a bite out of the cake. You didn’t like it, it was too sweet, but you liked their reaction enough to finish it, trying not to laugh and choke on it. You were trying to avoid looking at them so as to not make it too obvious, even though it was, so you didn’t notice when they finally huffed and went somewhere you couldn’t see.

It didn’t occur to you to wonder why, so early in the day and with so few people present, only a single slice of cake remained. Had it, you perhaps would’ve looked around, first suspecting a fat guy, only then to find a thin girl with pink hair eating every other slice of cake in the building.

Author's Note