Starry Never Left the Forest

What an utter embarrassment.

Treating a friend like shit. Like some sort of damn pack animal. All over my own personal bullshit.

Who the fuck was I to ask for forgiveness? After making him carry *my* baggage up a big fucking hill.

Why couldn’t I just tell him where we were going?

What the fuck is wrong with me?

No wonder ponies like *me* don’t ever have real friends. Ponies like me only ever have acquaintances and leeches, before they do the sensible thing and break things off the moment they find out just how much of a broken, needy mess I am.

But just like that.

I was back at the steps of the library.

As if nothing ever happened.

This is normally the part where there’s some big revelation, or god forbid, I’d have gotten some closure from this mess, but...

...keep dreaming, Starry.

Keep dreaming that you’ll ever find piece. You old, useless wreck.

Especially with Golden at your seven-o-clock.

...

...wait, what?

“Hey, Starry! Wait up!”

“Oh! Golden! I-”

I tried not to look him in the eye. “I wasn’t...*really* expecting to see you again...”

“Over what?”

“Over, you know...”

“Oh. Heh.”

“...”

“...”

“Oh! And, that reminds me.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m...”

I really wanted to look him in the eyes now, but.

I guess I just didn’t have it in me.

What is wrong with me?

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh! It’s..It’s nothing, really. I just...really wanna know what’s going on, is all. You’re my friend, and I don’t want to watch you suffer.”

I really don’t deserve him as a friend.

“You know...you mind if we grab lunch together over the weekend? With everything – you know – I probably should talk about it.”

“...I mean, I don’t want to push yourself into doing something you don’t wanna do...”

“No! It’s fine! My father, he was – hoo boy – he was a little more than just a locksmith. I’d love to tell you some of his stories, if you happen to be free.”

Golden’s eyes widened. “...really?”

I grinned. “...for Kirin barbecue, that is.”

“Ohmygodohmygodohmygod YES!”

He reared up, hooves high in the air. His little mannerisms he made whenever he was exited always made me giggle.

“Oh MAN. We are SO ON for this. Let’s um...wait. Hang on. Almost forgot.”

My toy doll. The one from the forest.

I really, really don’t deserve him as a friend.

“...can I give you a hug?”