Welcome To The Panic Room

I woke up, Flame Flare sleeping in a nearby armchair. I rubbed my eyes. It was a fitful night of sleep but enough to manage through the day. I got up, walked downstairs into the kitchen deciding to let Flame sleep a little longer, and dished up some honey nut oats, leaving the box out for my friend for when she was ready to dish up her own bowl.

I didn’t have to wait very long, no longer than ten minutes or so before I heard her footsteps coming down the stairs, a sleepy dragon rubbing her eyes.

“Morning, Flare,” I greeted. Flame waved her hand in return before grabbing the box of honey nut oats and pouring some into a bowl.

“How’d you sleep last night?” she asked.

I shrugged in reply.

“That good, huh?” she chuckled.

“I kept waking up a bunch.”

Flame stared at me in concern. “About… you-know-what?”

I nodded my head. I knew she was trying her best to avoid making my situation worse, but it still stung a bit.

We just sat in silence for a moment, the only sound being our bowls clinking from the spoons.

“Script,”

“Hmm?”

“Maybe… you should talk to the others about this?” she asked. “I don’t know how to help with this kind of thing that much.”

I just shook my head. “Nopony would understand…” I muttered.

Flame let out a sigh. “Lilly already has her assumption about what’s happened, Script.”

“She does…?”

“She’s not a writer for nothing, she does her research.”

I let out a soft chuckle. “Was it that obvious…?”

“To her, it was. Ellie still doesn’t know, she just told me what was going on with you. She said she wants to talk to you, when you’re ready of course.”

I let out a sigh in defeat. “Alright, I’ll talk to Lilly…”

I walked through town to my friend Lilly’s house, Flame Flare walking beside me. I was extremely skittish since it was not too far from the alleyway, but I knew nopony would mess with Flame. She was a dragon after all, sure she was shy, but when it came to protecting her friends, she’d put up a fight.

I jumped when I heard the sound of laughter. My head jolted toward the sound, finding some foals running around playing a game of tag. Flame gently put her claw on my shoulder, causing me to become startled once more.

“Sorry!” she panicked. “I shouldn’t have done that, I just don’t want you to be so afraid.”

“No, it’s okay.” I sighed. “It’s not your fault…”

Once we had approached the house, I knocked on the door, staring at the ground, unable to look at Lily once the door opened.

“Hey, Script,” she said with a soft voice. “Come on in.”

I slowly walked inside, still staring at the ground, taking a seat on the sofa, Flame sitting beside me and Lilly on an armchair. I just sat there silent for a few minutes.

“Script,” Lilly began. “I know this is hard for you. I’m not going to force you to talk about the incident, but I’m here to listen to what you have to say.”

I kept staring at the ground, trying to process my words, find something to say.

“There’s no rush, just take your time.”

I couldn’t hold it in anymore. My eyes welled up with tears as my walls came crashing down. Flame just gently rubbed my back, trying to provide some form of comfort.

“It’s all my fault…” I whimpered. “Why was I so stupid…?”

“Script, this was not your fault,” she said. “You’re not alone in this, this can happen to anypony.”

“But it is!” I cried. “It’s my fault that I chose to go through the alley late at night…”

“I hear you, and I know a lot of emotions are going through your mind right now, but please believe me when I say it’s not your fault.” She gently placed a hoof on my shoulder, a soft smile on her face. “You’re not alone in this Script, there are other ponies who have gone through something similar, you can seek help.”

I shook my head. “I don’t want help…”

“Nopony can force you, but just know the option is there, okay?”

I nodded my head.

“Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?”

I got up from the sofa. “No, I just feel like I need some time alone…”

“Alright, we’ll give you some space, just know that we’re here for you if you need anypony, alright?”

"Thank you," I said with a small nod as I slowly backed away before walking out of Lilly's home and into the open. Flame stayed behind as Lilly had given me some much-needed space. The cool, fresh air hit me, and for a brief moment, I could feel my breath becoming less ragged as I began my walk home, each step feeling a little easier than the last.

As I walked home, I tried to calm my racing thoughts. The sky was overcast, the gray clouds reflecting my mood. I passed by the park, where ponies were going about their day, completely unaware of what I had just gone through. The memory of the alleyway incident kept replaying in my mind, and I found myself hyperventilating as I walked faster, wanting to get home as soon as possible. "Script?"

I jumped, startled at the sudden name-calling.

I turned to see a familiar face, Flame Flare. She looked at me with concern, and I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. "Hey, are you okay?" she asked.

I just stared at them, my mouth opening and closing as I tried to form words.

"Maybe I should get Lily?"

"No!" I panicked, shaking my head.

I walked back home with Flame Flare. She walked silently beside me, allowing me to process my thoughts and emotions. I appreciated her presence, even if we weren't talking. It was a relief to be away from the prying eyes and gossip of Ponyville, at least for the moment. I felt raw and exposed after baring my soul to Lilly, and I needed time to lick my wounds in private.

I walked through the front door of my house, feeling utterly exhausted. The emotional toll of the day had taken its toll on me, and all I wanted was to curl up in bed and sleep for days.

"Hey, are you alright?" Flame asked as she followed me inside. I just shook my head, not trusting myself to speak without breaking down again. I walked over to the sofa and collapsed onto it, burying my face in my hooves.

Flame walked over and gently sat beside me, her claw resting lightly on my back. "It's okay to feel this way, you know. You don't have to be strong all the time." She spoke softly, her words comforting despite the ache in my chest. "You can lean on me, or on Lily, or even talk to a professional if you want. We're here for you, no matter what."

She fell silent, letting me process her words. After a long moment, I lifted my face from my hooves, tears still staining my face. I looked at her, feeling so many emotions I could barely speak.

"I... I don't know what to do," I whispered, my voice cracking. "I feel so broken, like I can never be the same again."

Flame's eyes softened with compassion. "That's okay, Script." she smiled. "I know you feel broken right now, and that's understandable. What happened to you... it's something no one should ever have to go through." Flame's voice was gentle, and she kept rubbing my back with her claw in slow, soothing motions.

"But I want you to know that no matter how broken you feel, you're still the same pony we all know and love. A little battered, maybe, but still with the same strength and spirit."

I got up from the couch, staring at the floor. "I think I just want to be alone right now, Flare..." I mumble. "It's nothing against you, I just need some time..."

She nods, understanding in her eyes. "Of course, Script. I completely understand. Take all the time you need. I'll be here when you're ready to talk, or if you just need someone to be with you in silence." She stood up, giving my shoulder a gentle squeeze before stepping back. "Remember, you're not alone in this. Even when you're by yourself, know that Lily and I are just a shout away." I only stared at the ground as she walked out the door.

I was alone in my house, and for a moment the world was quiet, but my anxiety began to creep up again. The panic attack hit hard and fast - my heart raced, my chest constricted, and I broke out in a cold sweat.

I stumbled towards the bathroom, trying to make it there before I completely fell apart. I managed to reach the toilet just in time, my stomach heaving violently as I retched. Tears streamed down my face as my body convulsed, the panic attack taking hold with a crushing intensity. When it finally subsided, I collapsed on the bathroom floor, feeling completely drained and hopeless. The pain and fear still lingered in my chest, making it hard to breathe.

I lay on the bathroom floor for what felt like hours, my body aching and my mind reeling. The panic attack had left me utterly spent, both physically and emotionally. I knew I should get up, but the thought of moving felt like an insurmountable task. I just wanted to stay right there on the cold tile, where the world couldn't touch me. As I lay there, my mind drifted to the events of the day.

As I lay there, my mind drifted to the events of the day. The alleyway incident played out in my mind like a sickening movie reel. The stallion's grip on my mane, the rough touch of his hooves, the way he forced me down... I shuddered, trying to push the memories away. But they were there, etched into my mind, a constant reminder of what had been done to me.

"What could I have done to prevent all of this?" I thought aloud.

I suddenly hear the front door creak open. My heart jumps, and I freeze, listening intently. Footsteps echo through the house, and I realize it's not Flare or Lilly. It's someone else. I slowly lift my head, my ears perked up, ready to bolt if necessary. The footsteps stop outside the bathroom door, and I can see the shadow of hooves through the crack underneath the door. "Script?"

The shadow shifts, and there's a gentle knock on the door. "Script, it's me. Are you alright?" It's Flame Flare's voice, sounding concerned. I exhale, realizing it's just her. I slowly push myself up, my legs shaking as I stand. I walk over to the door and open it, revealing Flame standing there with a look of worry on her face.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," she says softly.

I stared up at her, my expression vacant. "No, no it's fine." My voice came out as barely more than a whisper.

I blinked slowly, as if coming back to reality from a haze. Flare furrowed her brow, glancing over me with clear concern.

"Lily asked me to check on you, I know you said you needed space, but..."

"I know. I'm sorry," I interrupted her, my voice still soft but steadier. "I didn't mean to make you worry." I stepped back into the bathroom, gesturing for her to follow. "Let's take this to the living room."

She nodded slowly as my gaze dropping to the floor. I turned to head back to the living room. I could feel Flame's eyes on me as I walked, and I knew she was probably concerned about my state. I collapsed onto the couch, sinking into the cushions with a heavy sigh. Flame followed behind me, her hooves padding softly against the hardwood floor.

She sat down beside me, her body language relaxed but attentive. "So, I was talking with Lily..." she began. "She says she wants me to move in for a while."

The air in the living room felt still and heavy with unspoken anxiety. I lifted my head slowly, meeting her gaze. My heart pounded in my chest, and my mouth felt dry.

"To... to do what?" I asked, trying to keep the quiver from my voice. She gently touched my back, her scales rough against my fur.

"To help watch over you and make sure you're safe and comfortable." Flame spoke quietly and clearly.

I stared at her, my eyes wide. "I don't need watching over," I said, my voice coming out harsher than I intended. I immediately felt guilty, knowing she meant well. I sighed and rubbed my face with my hooves. "I'm sorry, Flare. I didn't mean to snap at you. I just... I don't want to feel like I'm being smothered right now."

Flame nodded, understanding in her eyes. "I know, and I understand that. But Lily and I are worried about you. We just want to make sure you're safe and have support." She paused, choosing her words carefully. "We both care about you, and we want to be here for you."

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. The thought of someone always around, even if it was my friends, felt suffocating. But I also knew they were just trying to help.

"I..."

I hesitated, my words catching in my throat. "I appreciate the concern, I really do. But I don't think I can handle having someone around all the time right now. It's not that I don't trust you or Lily, it's just... I need some space to process everything on my own terms."

Flame listened intently, her expression soft and understanding. "I get it, Script. I do. But how about we do this, I'll come check on you every so often for the next month or so, sound good?" she asked.

I nod slowly, considering her offer. "Alright, that sounds fair. Thank you, Flare." I give her a small smile, grateful for her understanding.

She smiles back, her eyes warm. "Good. Now, how about we do something to take your mind off things? Want to watch a movie or something?"

I shake my head. "No, not really. I think I just need some rest."

Flame nods.

"Alright, I understand. I'll leave you to it then. But remember, I'm here if you need anything, okay?" Flame said softly, her voice filled with genuine concern. She stood up from the couch, her orange scales shimmering in the dim light of the living room.

I nodded, my gaze still fixed on the floor. "Thank you, Flare. I appreciate it more than you know."

Flame gently patted my back before walking towards the front door. "Take care of yourself, Script. I'll be back tomorrow to check on you."

As the door clicked shut behind her, I sank further into the couch, overwhelmed by the weight of the past few days. I closed my eyes, trying to push away the unwanted thoughts and emotions threatening to overwhelm me.

I felt my eyes grow heavy as my body gave in to the exhaustion.