A Critically Endangered Species
Sometimes it’s the little things in life that make us furious. When a show makes a decision you don’t agree with. When your favorite character gets defeated in a humiliating way. When a cartoon makes all the main characters in an episode complete assholes for no good reason and never called them out on it and somehow people still think that episode is one of the best of the season, and every time you see a reviewer say that you just wanna-…..Sorry, getting off topic.
You all know me as Flame. The resident Zipp Simp (Trademark) of Fimfiction. My time on this site has been all about one pony, that obviously being Zipp Storm of G5 fame, writing her in stories that put her through living hell that makes the reader question if this is the work of a fan of the character or a deranged lunatic.
However, one sign that the man, or bull if we want to stick with our OC’s ‘ponysonas’, is a true fan is how far they’d go if their favorite character was harmed in anyway. And that is what today’s story is all about.
We begin the scene with a certain purple, winged abomination (no, the other one) waking up in a daze. “What the?” She groaned as she stood up, only to find that she was chained at the legs and neck, and her wings were binded to her sides. “What is this?” She demanded to know as she struggled to break free.
“This is my vengeance.” An unknown voice said before a single light shown in an already lit room and the floor opened up. Emerging from the floor in slow motion was a behemoth of a creature. “My tusks are swords.” He said dramatically, gesturing to the large ivory on his face. “My legs are clubs.” A stomp emphasized that point. “My trunk.” Flex the 40,000 muscle (true fact) hand-nose. “Is a guillotine!” He finished before the rising stopped and his entire body was in view.
Allura just blinked at what she saw. “You’re an elephant.” She said in confusion.
“Yes, anyone who can see the cover art can notice that.” I reply as we switch back to first person for all of my talking bits.
“Why are you an elephant?” Was her next question.
“Because I why make an OC that’s either a weak pony or a Gary Stu of an alicorn when you can be the true master race?” I replied before I got in close. Uncomfortably close to the point I was in Allura's face. "You can call me Flame, and you Allura are in so much trouble it's not even funny."
"Trouble?" Allura repeated. "For what?"
With a sigh, I began my villain origin story. "You know, I've been saying for over a year now. I said 'If Allura ever hypnotizes Zipp again I will make her into a throw rug.' And I have been waiting for that moment, while also dreading it, planning on just how I was going to do it. I was originally going to make a whole podcast of this moment and share it with everypony, even had a rewrite of that one song from Hamilton ready, but that was sounding stupid, so I decided to simplify it and only have one special guest."
"Who?" Allura asked before another light shone on the pony in question. And to the surprise of literally no one reading this, it was Zipp.
"Me." Zipp answered. "We still got some things to discuss."
"You!?" Allura gasped at seeing the pegasus again. "But how!?"
"You may have wiped my memories of the encounter and destroyed my phone. But you just dropped me off in front of your cave like you did with Izzy. It didn't take long for me to realize I must've confronted you about something. And when I started talking with Pipp and Comet about what I was doing earlier, it all came back to me." Zipp explained before I took over.
"You know, I was patient with you. I let it pass when they did the recap episode of the special, I let it pass when you did it in the Sunset fic, I almost charged into this when those leaked images were released." I counted with my trunk fingers, which really was just flexing them up and down since I only had two. The more I spoke, the more deranged I sounded. "But I was nice and decided 'you know, maybe she won't do it'. And when the show ended, I thought I'd never have to worry about coming back to this story. I even thought the Zipp Saga story I made where she kicked your ass could serve as my vengeance. But then someone started releasing the unfinished episode animatics, which I approve of for the sake of giving the writers their just credits, and HERE WE ARE NOW!!" I shouted with a stomp for emphasis!
"She-" Allura tried to defend herself no doubt, but I wasn't in a listening mood and grabbed her throat with my trunk.
"You even had to show me the image of it in show style! So now that image is going to be in my head all day, along with the literal sick feeling I got!." I cut her off. That sick part is true BTW, even as I'm currently typing this.
"You know." Zipp spoke up. "I tried to help you. I was wiling to give you a chance to show a not evil side to you. I could've even helped you possibly find your brother. I'm a sister, too. I would've sympathized with you." She said with a said sigh. "But you made your choice. And now I gotta do what I must to keep everypony safe."
With that being said, I took it as my cue to advance forward. "Oh, I'm going to enjoy this." I said gleefully as I lowered my tusks.
Due to this being Teen rated, and I love animals IRL, we will be skipping over the execution scene as I refuse to actually watch tutorials on how to skin a cat. Just use your imagination.
When all was said and cleaned up, me and Zipp walked out of the location where this story took place. "Thanks for helping me with this." I thanked the pegasus.
"Yeah, I still think that you went a little to far with actually killing her." Zipp admitted. "The only reason I agreed to this was because I knew you needed the help after today's episode came out, and that none of this is cannon to anything, so there's no actual repercussions for your insane actions."
"Yeah." I sighed sadly. "If only I could actually-"
"I'm the one she actually hypnotized, and even I don't have this much of a hatred for her." Zipp cut me off. "You really need to let that go before it effects your opinion on other episodes."
"In time, Zipp." I promised her. "In time." I said before giving a yawn. "Well, I stayed up twelve hours waiting for this to drop, and have some much needed sleep to catch up on. See ya around." I waved her goodbye.
"Get well soon!" Zipp waved me goodbye in return. Once she was certain I was out of earshot, she sighed and muttered to herself. "F
cking Bronies."
Author's Note
Well, I did say I was going to do it.
Really, I don't even know what to call this...........Let's just say it was stress relief and never come back to this again.
