Helluva Moon

by David Silver

1 - When the Moon Hits Your Eye

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Blitzo stepped through the diamond like portal between worlds, Loona held by the hand through it. "Easy peasy. All we have to do is put a bullet into her head. First step, find her."

Loona tapped at Blitzo's shoulder.

"What? I'm looking around!" He craned over the balcony's edge, peering down into the city below. "Where in hell are we?"

She kept tapping until he looked up. She pointed past him towards a large equine figure. "Is that who you're looking for?"

He started. "Oh, uh." He quickly got out a folder of papers and found a picture. "Y-yeah! Luna!" Loona looked at him. "Luna. L-U-N-A, totally different."

She rolled her eyes.

Blitzo chuckled as he got his rifle ready, just to toss it to Loona. "You take the shot."

"Really?"

"Yeah, look. I don't want to shoot her." He didn't feel like going into details why that was. "So you do it. Just one quick shot and it's payday."

Loona got her head around the rifle and lined up the shot. Her hand shook a bit as she took a deep breath, calming herself. The trigger clicked.

But nothing happened. She frowned and tries again, clicking with equally little effect. "Dad, what did you fuck up this time?"

Blitzo gave a dismissive wave. "It's fine, we can use a knife or something." He snatched the rifle away from her. "If you can't use that."

"Not my fault." She rolled her eyes towards the sky, then back at the pony, onwards to the city below. "I don't think we're on earth, Dad."

"What?" He looked back down. "This is Earth, Loonie. What are you talking about?"

She pointed at small figures down below. "I could be wrong, but they look more like those little drawings you have around."

"What drawings?!" He threw her back to have a look himself. Down there, other horses. They were ponies, little ponies. "Oh, shit. They didn't say we'd be coming here! Damn it all. I should have asked where the fuck that thing goes before going through!" He slammed his hand against the railing in frustration.

Loona pulled out her phone and tried to take a picture. "Okay. So what's your backup plan?"

Blitzo looked up at their target. "Look, you just have to—" His words died as she turned around. He ducked just behind a little curving on the rock. "Distract her! Tell her you're beholden by her or something! Quick!"

"What?" Loona cocked a brow, eyes on the big horse that was slowly approaching her. She sighed, lowering her head as she stepped closer.

Blitzo kept the rifle close, peeking out only when Loona called out. "Lady, uh... Luna! I come to tell you the truth." Loona swallowed thickly. "You have stolen something from me."

Luna blinks at the strange creature before her. "I do not think we have met. What of yours could I have stolen?"

Loona cringed, squirming in place. "My heart," she barely got out.

Luna's eyes widened as her mouth opens with surprise. "Thou said this truly?"

Loona folded her arms. "...Yes."

"Such is unusual for me to hear," Luna spoke, stepping closer to Loona. "If you mean what you say, I would hear more of it." She spread a wing and curled it around the hellhound, having no idea of her true identity. "Shall we step inside?"

Blitzo stood from his hiding spot. "Son of a bitch." He tried firing off a shot at the big mare, but he quickly found the rifle to be broken. "Great. Perfect." He pressed the back of his hand, trying to activate the crystal, but it was just as stubborn. "Wow, tonight is just perfect!" He threw up both hands before shoving his rifle away and slinking forward to see what was happening with Loona.

"For centuries, I have lain my head upon this pillow, wondering what it would be like to be in thy arms," Loona spoke, pretending to be the worst actor ever. That wasn't too far to go from the reality of things. She was invited to curl with Luna, trying her best to look happy about the idea.

Luna inclined her head at the hellhound. "You are two-legged. I do not mean to judge on that alone, but what made you consider a four-legged creature, such as myself?"

Loona licked her muzzle, and the fur around it, glancing down. "My kind aren't known for kindness."

Luna perked an ear at that. "What are your kind known for?"

Loona flexed her claws. "...Causing trouble."

Luna felt Loona tense against her. "Your claws look rather dangerous," she spoke gently. "It is often said, you know your enemy by learning how they handle friendship." She smiled a little. "You are clearly nervous. Have you been cast out by your people?"

Loona gulped thickly, clinging to Luna's side, even going so far as to let her tail wag. "Yeah," she lied, feigning a sniffle. "They don't like my dad either. Said he's a piece of shit." She froze up, suddenly realizing that her "cover" was how she actually felt at that moment. "It's not fair."

"No, it isn't," Luna said. "You seem to be a kind soul."

"Thanks..." Loona replied, pressing her head against Luna's side. "This may sound odd, but you're surprisingly good as a pillow, just saying."

Luna smiled again, more broadly this time. "If I do not show kindness, I cannot expect others to show it to me. I have been deceived too many times."

Loona eased the hold on her claws, relaxing with each deep breath she took. "Yeah... Yeah... I hate it when jerks lie to me." Like she was in the middle of doing. Some of her tension came rushing back. "So, hey! Couldn't help but notice we're both ladies. Does that bother you at all? Is that, like, a horse taboo or anything?"

Luna looked back down at the hellhound, shaking her head. "No, it isn't strange to me at all. The bonds of love are beautiful, no matter what form they take."

Loona relaxed once more. "You know what, I can definitely see what my dad saw in you."

Luna sat up at that. "Your father also thinks of me?!"

Loona froze, realizing she said too much. "Y-yeah, he used to say stories about you, back in the old days, you know?" She laughed tensely with her best false smile.

"What kind of stories?" Luna's eyes were alight with curiosity. "You must tell me!"

"Uh..." Loona stood, nervous and anxious. "No... No, I couldn't." She scratched through Luna's thick pelt. "I'd much rather enjoy the real thing right in front of me. You're a bit nicer than a story, you know."

Luna brightened at that. "Ah! So your father did speak of my appearance?"

"Only so much," Loona lied once more, shaking her head. "But actually seeing you? It blows it all away. Makes me, uh, wonder if he ever actually saw you. I'm amazed."

Luna sat tall and proud. "Indeed! I have been through much strife, but I remain faithful to who I am. Nopony can take that away from me!" She inclined her head. "You yet struggle to hold true to yourself, new friend Loona." She laughed gently then. "But it must be fate, that we two of the same name should meet."

"Yeah, fate. Definitely, yeah." Loona breathed slowly, licking her muzzle. "Hey, so, just a question. I'm not from around here. What's your favorite spot to hang out in?"

Luna touched her nose to Loona's cheek. "What a delightful question. Hm. I will arrange that we can visit it, tomorrow. Come at about the same time, and I will show you there."

Loona looked towards where Blitzo was hiding. She smirked and looked back at Luna. "Actually, I've got a better idea." She bit into the royal dress Luna wore, carefully pulling it away with a paw as she turned back to the wall. "I'd rather get to know you better, right now." She growled in a way only a canine could.

Blitzo's eyes widened as Loona made her move. "No! Get out of there!" he hissed out, not that she could hear him. "Abort mission! Abort!" He tried crossing his arms in the vain hope that she would see him.

"Ah... I am not entirely sure about this..." Luna whimpered.

Loona took a deep breath. "Listen, I'll be honest with you." She wagged her tail once. "We wolves, we love howling at the moon." She leaned in a little. "And the moon just landed in front of me."

Luna broke out in a sheepish grin. "Ah! I understand. Do you have a song in mind?"

Loona blinked, realizing her attempt to seduce had gone terribly wrong. "I, uh." She rubbed at the back of her head. "Wanna kiss?"

Luna shook her head as she stood. "On the first date? I must decline, dear Loona. Let us learn of one another first. We will kiss when you've shown yourself worthy of that. Understand?"

Loona released the dress and stepped back. "Fine, I'll just have to work harder then." She turned on a heel, marching away.

The moment she was outside, Blitzo grabbed her and yanked her out of view. "The hell were you doing in there?! You nearly fucked it all up!"

"It's not my fault! You wanted me to distract her, so I tried doing what you would do!" Loona folded her arms across her chest.

Blitzo shook his head. "No, that isn't what I meant!" He colored faintly. "And that isn't what I would have done."

"Yeah yeah." She leaned back against the wall. "She said to come back tomorrow, so fix that gun of yours and we can finish this tomorrow, okay?"

"Fine," he said through grit teeth. "But first we gotta go check out this world. I didn't ask to get sent here, but there is no way I'm missing out." He jumped over the rails and was gone in an instant.

Loona peered at where he had been a moment before. "Great. Now I have to deal with that." She jumped down herself, padding away in the hopes of finding something cool.

As she walked, she noticed the looks she was getting. There were multiple smaller equines, peering up at her. Each had a picture on their butt. They looked just like the figures that her dad loved to collect. "Great." They were all smaller than Luna, barely reaching Loona's crotch.

Loona sighed as she crouched, looking one of them in the eyes. "Hey," she said simply.

The little horse smiled and spoke up. "Hello! My name is Cotton Cloudy, and I am a Pegasus! What are you?"

Loona straightened her back. "I'm a hellhound."

"A hell what?" Cotton Cloudy asked, scratching behind her ear with a hoof. "Hello. You're a nice creature, right?"

"Nicest," she got out with no enthusiasm. She blinked, realizing she was surrounded by small horses. There were all shapes and sizes. Some had pointed horns, others had wings. They each came in different colors, and yet they were all familiar to her. "Oh, those drawings were based off you guys..."

That didn't stop them from coming in to sniff and nose and generally bowl her over in an avalanche of adorable equine flesh. She was eventually able to wriggle free of the little pile, straightening out her fur as best she could. "I'm not here to stay."

"Then why did you come?" Cotton Cloudy hopped in place. "You look tired. I know a place you can rest. Do you wanna go there? It's very pretty and it smells nice."

Loona waved a paw at that, ready to deny before she second guessed herself. "Maybe." She licked her muzzle. "If it's a private place, then yeah, I'd like to see it."

Cotton Cloudy brightened at that. "This way." They led the way with a cheerful giggle. "I'd fly, but you don't have wings."

Loona peered up at the stars and smiled faintly. "Yeah... That would be pretty cool." She turned away from the pony. "Maybe in another life, you know?"

"Life is very long," Cotton Cloudy turned into a large building. "But you can sleep here. It's a hotel, and they're very nice here. They'll give you a room for the night, even if you don't have a reservation."

Loona raised a lone finguer. "Even without any money?"

"We do it all the time!" Cotton Cloudy was bounced on her feet as she trotted towards the counter. "Heeeeey, where's Twinkleshine?"

A new mare popped into view. "Twinkleshine, report, oh! Look at her." Her eyes shined, looking at Loona. "Wow. Does she want to stay here?!"

"She has no place else to go." Cotton Cloudy waved over at Loona. "But she's friendly!"

"Aw, poor dear." Twinkleshine popped back down. "Your room is at the top floor." She offered a key dangling off her hoof. "Have a nice stay."

Loona pouted. "You know I'm just here for tonight, right?" She took the key and peered up at the stairs. "What's so great about it anyway?"

Cotton Cloudy pointed to an elevator. "Don't go walking up there, silly."

Loona stuck her tongue out at the Pegasus, crossing over to the elevator. "If it was a bed, I could climb to the top, no problem." She entered the lift, trying to understand how it worked. Fortunately, the numbers were clear enough and with the press of the biggest, she zipped up towards her new place. "This whole world is a bit wacky."


Author's Note

A new story, we begin! Its schedule is twice a month. Releasing this right now as it's actually late for this month due to hashing out the basic details of the story with my lovely patron.

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