Video Game Journeys: Sam & Max Save the World

Rarity paced the floor of the office as Sam picked up his bowling ball and one of Max's boxing gloves.

"It doesn't make any sense," she pondered. "Why would someone as talented as Brady Culture want to do something like this?"

"Well, we're not going to find out just by standing around here," Sam said.

"You're right. I suppose we should find out more about this Brady Culture from this Peepers person."

"Oh, before I forget, when we were at Bosco's earlier, he mentioned something about a tear gas grenade launcher that he invented. Unfortunately, it costs $10,000."

Rarity's eyes went wide.

"$10,000?! IS HE CRAZY?!"

"No, just paranoid. I mean, the store is called Bosco's Inconvenience, after all."

"Point taken. But still, that's more than most average people make in a year. How does he expect you to get that kind of money?!"

"Well..."

"By giving out one huge ticket," Max chimed in.

"I stand corrected. YOU'RE the crazy one," Rarity said.

"When is he not?" Sam said.

"You guys, I think I just saw Peepers go into Sybil's place!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Well then, what are we waiting for? Let's go see if she has info on this Culture freak!" Rarity said.

The group exited the office and walked into Sybil's place. The room was dimly lit with a grey couch in the back. Above the couch was a sign that read, THIS IS WHERE YOUR PAST COMES TO DIE. Sam noticed that someone was banging the inside the closet door as Peepers, going under the guise of Sybil, greeted them. Rarity whispered something to Sam, who then nodded his head.

Sam spoke with Peepers as Rarity snuck up to the closet door. She took a hairpin out of her pocket and placed it inside the keyhole. After a while, she heard a click, which meant that the door was unlocked. She opened the door and saw an adult woman with black hair tied in a bun, a beauty mark above the right side of her mouth, a tattoo on her forearms resembling flames, and hazel-green eyes. She wore red cateye glasses, a maroon-colored outfit, and small silver hoop earrings. This was the REAL Sybil Pandemik.

"Rarity, it's you!" she exclaimed as Rarity put the hairpin away. "Thank God! I've been locked in that closet so long I was starting to invent life stories for the mothballs! I've got to sit down."

Sybil went over to her desk and sat down. As soon as she did, she was shocked to see that Peepers was still in the room.

"Oh, my God! He's still here?! Call a cop!"

"You're in luck, ma'am," Sam said as he finished his conversation with Peepers. "Sam and Max. We're Freelance Police."

"Sybil Pandemik, licensed psychotherapist, nice to know ya. ARREST THAT LUNATIC IMMEDIATELY!"'

"What's the charge?"

"ASSAULT! KIDNAPPING! IDENTITY THEFT!"

"Those are good charges."

"Some of my favorites! And what about mopery?" Max asked.

"He locked locked me in the closet and he's been pretending he's me!" Sybil snarled.

"He did?! But why?" Pinkie asked, getting up to her face.

Rarity pulled Pinkie away from Sybil, then she smiled sheepishly at her.

"I do apologize for Pinkie's behavior," she sighed.

"It's all right. With all the therapy I've gone through with her, I've come to expect it," Sybil said. "Anyways, cases like that of that lunatic over there can be very complicated and delicate. There may be repressed feelings of inadequate transference, or latent unwarranted hypochondriac freudianism."

"In English, please," Rarity groaned.

"Well, similar to your friend, he's a complete whack-job. Although, actually, now that I look closely, I think he's been hypnotized."

"How can you tell?" Sam asked. "He looks so normal and life-like."

"I'm a licensed psychotherapist. It takes a professional eye."

"Can we borrow your eye? We'll bring it back," Max said.

Rarity facepalmed in disbelief. She could not believe how random Max was.

"Are there steps we can take?" Sam asked. "Soothing music or perhaps some sort of invasive surgery?"

"Shock treatment! Shock treatment!"

"Typically a hypnotic state can be revised after rendering the subject susceptible to new input," Sybil said.

"Say what?" Rarity asked.

"You've got to knock them unconscious to bring them out of it."

"KNOCK 'EM UNCONSCIOUS! NOW YOU'RE TALKING!" Max yelled excitedly.

"I can demonstrate on this guy if you'll knock him out for me."

"Consider it done."

Max went up to Peepers with his boxing glove and attempted to knock him out, but Peepers immediately said his catchphrase.

"I can see you!"

Peepers then ran off and ran right back.

"Holy crap, he's fast!" Pinkie exclaimed.

Pinkie then went up to Sybil and decided to ask her something.

"Whatever happened to the tattoo business? You put a dumbbell on Bulk Bicep's bicep."

"The sweet, buff guy?" Sybil asked.

"Yep!"

"He was very nervous about it, but he loved his tattoo in the end. As for my tattoo business, though, there was a guy that came in who wanted a ship on his chest, and I misheard him, and... well... I decided to hang it up after that."

"Aw, bummer. You were a very popular tattoo artist."

"Thanks for the sympathy, Pinkie."

"You know, it's funny. You're right across the street from us and I don't think I've ever been in here before today," Sam said.

"Your friend has. He's always trying to con me into giving him some kind of weird tattoo for free."

"You can put a line on my head and some eyes on my butt and I'd look like I was upside-down!" Max said.

"For the last time: NO!"

Pinkie fell on the floor laughing at Max's request. There was just something funny about the way he described the kind of tattoo he wanted. In fact, she was laughing so hard that Rarity had to drag her out of the building with Sam and Max as they exited.

As soon as they got outside, Pinkie breathed heavily and wiped a tear from her eye that she got from laughing.

"Sorry. That was just too funny!" she said.

"Yes, yes. Ha, ha. Hilarious," Rarity mocked. "Can we focus on the task at hand, now?! We need to find some way to knock the Soda Poppers out so we can bring them out of their hypnotic state!"

"What about that tear gas grenade launcher? That sounds like it'd be good."

"Well, I suppose so."

As Rarity and Pinkie continued talking, neither of them noticed Sam and Max get into their DeSoto and drive off to catch a criminal to get the tear gas money. They were only gone for about three minutes before they returned. In fact, that's exactly how long Rarity and Pinkie's conversation lasted before being interrupted by Max.

"Hey, Rarity!" he exclaimed.

"What is it, Max?"

"Guess what we just got? $10,000!"

Sam held up a sack full of money that he received from a motorist during the time they were gone.

"H-H-H-H-H-How did you...?"

"We kind of had to improvise," Sam said.

"We busted someone's taillight after we rear-ended them," Max added.

"You.. Did... WHAT?!" Rarity gasped.

"Max accidentally chewed through the brake lines, so it was the only way we could slow down," Sam explained.

"And now I'm starting to question the morality of you two. At least we have money to buy Bosco's invention."

The group walked over to Bosco's and gave him the money for the tear gas grenade launcher.

"We got your tear gas money right here," Max said as Sam put the bag on the counter.

Thankful for their patronage, Bosco put the tear gas grenade launcher on the counter, which was revealed to be a salad shooter filled with onions.

"Now put that away before someone gets hurt!" Bosco instructed.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked as the B-TADS alarm went off.

After a few seconds, a boxing glove came down and conked Sam on the head.

"Oooww! That looked painful," Pinkie grimaced.

"The ten-thousand just covered the cost of materials, you know?" Bosco said.

"Oh, I'm sure," Max said.

Sam eventually got up and put the tear gas grenade launcher away.

"Are you all right?" Pinkie asked.

"Thankfully, yes," Sam said shakily.

"Hey, Sam, maybe we can use that grenade launcher against one of the Soda Poppers," Max said.

"You know, Max, I think you're right. Let's try it out on our friend, Peepers."

The group walked out of the store and made their way over Sybil's place.

Once they entered Sybil's, Sam decided to pull out the tear gas grenade launcher and aim it at Peepers.

"Oh, Sybil," Sam said in a singsong voice.

"Yes?" Sybil responded.

"Uh, the other Sybil."

"What is that?" Peepers asked.

"Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit."

Pinkie cringed as soon as an onion hit Peepers in the face. It was an experience she knew all too well. Onions can make one cry. While he was busy crying, Max decided that it was finally time to hit Peepers with his boxing glove.

"Sweet dreams, Peeps!" he exclaimed as he hit Peepers.

"I can see you..." Peepers said groggily before passing out.

Unbeknownst to them, a certain someone was watching them from a television monitor.

"Oh my, that was great, that was great," the individual chuckled. "I mean, wait. My evil plan is being threatened. Good thing I have the other two twerps to handle it. Mwahahaha. Hmm, still not right. Mwahahaha...?"

They didn't know it then, but things were about to get a lot stranger than anything they've ever come across before.