Ponyville Box Of Chocolates

Orange Jack had been falling for quite some time.

"Everypony, this is Alex Pones, broadcasting live from Tartarus, Celestia's secret dungeon prison.
"Or at least, it belongs to what we call Celestia, but my sources indicate that she may be something far more sinister.
"Today on the show we'll be investigating rumours that the princess of Equestria might be a literal vampire changeling, as well as some frankly disgusting rumours about the factories in Cloudsda-"
Orange Jack fell on Alex Pones, destroying his camera in the process.

"Alex Pones is that really you!?
"Can you help me escape this place? And I'm really sorry about your camera!"

"No, Orange Jack. I can't help you escape."
Pinkie Pie took off her Alex Pones mask.
"Butt Pinkie Pie can."

"Pinkie Pie? What are you doing in Tartarus? Did Celestia hear about, you know, the Rainbow Dash incident?"

"No, I got locked up on purpose. I'm here undercover, doing work for the secret organisation, Butt, what you fell through was one of my Butt-holes."

"Butt, that can't really be a secret organisation!"

"Butt, that's exactly why it is. It's an organisation so silly no pony would ever believe that it exists. We operate in the open, and every pony just thinks that we're making elaborate jokes, that is, if any pony even notices us in the first place.
"Occasionally a crackpot traces us. Something smells fishy, dirty laundry, farting in morse code on the subway, all of it's the truth butt who would believe it?
"Any pony that says "butt", "butt", you can bet your butt that that pony's with Butt."

"Butt, what do you do?"

"We keep clean mostly. Our primary task is to fight any pony and every pony that does not work within or alongside Butt."

"Butt, who runs such a silly secret organisation?"

"You don't want to meet him; he's a real ass."

Brrrppp. Brrrppp. Brrrrppp.

"Shit! They're onto us. Quick, get into this Butt-hole. We'll meet up with Apple Jack on the other side."