The Summer Mistby Spyder27ChaptersWaves Don't DissipateTake It Out On YouSunscreen and ConvosNew Surroundings, Old ProblemsFragilityBlanket of PressureWaves Don't DissipateChapter I: Waves Don’t Dissipate The smell of paper is an odd scent. I can’t really tell if it is a good or bad smell. In some ways, the scent of an old book is nostalgic, but is it because of the dust? If it is, then isn’t it a bit weird to like the smell of it? Half the time, it can be overwhelming due to how old the book is, so this whole experience is weird… Even new books have their own distinct signature, letting you know that this particular title was made recently. I have no idea if I seem like a freak for that, but it’s always interesting to go to a book store and peruse their selection of stories from decades ago to now. The book in my hand closes with a resounding clap as a breath escapes my lips. The store has a large selection of titles, but not many of them interest me. I was hoping to find something new and interesting to read during my downtime, but nothing has caught my eye so far. Instead, I’ve run into a bunch of half-baked ideas that try to introduce an interesting twist that I can see from a mile away. Really, why does it seem like every story is trying to be emphatic with their portrayal? Many of these stories have been told better before… Looking to my left, I see Sunset looking through some books in the science section. She already has two books in her arms. Both of them seem to be time periods with some romance plot, judging from the covers. However, the book she is holding onto right now does not have much on the cover except for a few words. “Cancer: What you need to know. Dos and don’ts of care,” I whisper to myself with a slow sigh. The title is dreadfully boring, but the fact that she’s looking at that is concerning… Taking a deep breath, I walk over to her, bumping her shoulder. “We agreed to look at the facts together and to not worry too much about it.” Sunset seems a little startled from my presence, but she gives me a half nod, her eyes still glued to the page. “I know. Just give me a minute…” Her voice is heavy with concern, almost like she is in another plane of existence while she desperately searches the pages for a cure. Something that could help… As much as I appreciate her concern, this can’t be good for her. Every time I turn my back, I catch her looking at something cancer related. Websites, academic journals, medical resources, and now a book. It’s nice to have someone I can rely on, but this kind of stress is eating her up on the inside… It’s only been a couple of weeks too. We still have a lot of time to look at treatments and options. “I hope you remember that I don’t want the others to know,” I whisper to her, closing the book with my hand. “Not yet at least.” Sunset jerks the book away from my hand, opening it again. She walks a few steps away from me, pretending to ignore me. The way her body is so stoic is a false sign of confidence. I know she’s scared… She’s worried beyond comparison and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. At times, this bravado makes me wish that I had not told her, but I know that would have just made things worse… At least with this outcome, I am letting her know I trust her completely to have my back. There’s nothing I can do to lessen the concern. I just have to help her know it is okay to take a moment to breathe. “I know, but I still want to buy this book,” Sunset tells me with a shrug, closing it and adding it to the other two books in her arms. Something tells me that even if I tried, I wouldn’t be able to stop her. “Okay, but keep it out of sight of Sonata and Aria.” I walk beside her towards the front of the store. I can’t lie. This all worries me too, but I’ve mainly been burying myself in my work in the last couple of weeks to avoid the thoughts. The more I’ve thought about it, the less scary it feels. I mean, I’ve got my magic back. I knew hundreds of spells. It’s just a small tumor… All I need to do is find the right spell to use. Sure, magic works differently in this world, but I am still adept at the craft. I did not spend thousands of years perfecting my voice to lose it all. Especially now that I have friends… Now that I have her in my life… “I picked this one out because I thought it would be interesting to read together,” Sunset mentions as she holds up a book about two fantasy elves in a classic illegal love scenario. Romance is something she’s always been hooked on. “Read together?” I ask her with a chuckle, trying to keep the conversation going. The more I can distract her, the less she will worry. Hopefully… Besides, it’s nice to just talk with her. “Yeah~ I was thinking if we have a hard time sleeping, we could cuddle and take turns reading. Even if it is a mediocre story, I’m sure I will love it if it’s an experience with you.” Sunset’s cheeks blush for a moment, turning her gaze away from my own. The idea of a moment like that is cute. Happy. It reminds me of all the memories we’ve made thus far. And all the happy memories we may have left to make… “If the story is the worst of them all, I’m sure it would still be a nice funny memory with you,” I tell her quietly, resting my head on her shoulder. Even though we are waiting in line to buy these books, it feels oddly isolated here. Maybe because it is quiet, but it feels like the only person near me is her. The truth is that she is the only person that matters right now… Sure, my friends deserve to know what is going on, but they can wait a while longer. The last thing I want is a lot of pity and worry flooding my way. Instead, I just want to live my life to the fullest. Looking towards Sunset, her face is so solemn. Quiet… I know that I have to keep going. For her. There’s no way in hell I have come this far just to let her down now… Just to leave her broken. You’ll see, Sunset… There’s no reason to worry. We’ll be okay. Just wait and see. Take It Out On YouChapter II: Take It Out On You The clatter of silverware hitting the sink rings out in the kitchen. My hands are completely soaked as I scrub a plate clean. It’s almost like whatever gods there are out there are taunting me. Every time I wash the dishes, I always end up making a mess and getting myself wet. Maybe that’s the curse of actually owning a house. You have so many accessories that you need to take care of. Things like the lawn need to be trimmed regularly. In a way, it almost makes me wish we still lived in an apartment. However, the extra space is a welcome change… Especially since Sonata and Aria have been living with us for half a year now. “There’s also the option of taking chemotherapy before operating,” Sunset mentions from the dining room table, scrutinizing every detail on her laptop’s screen. I can’t help but sigh, wishing that Sunset would stop looking at every website known to man that could cover this issue. “Everything that I have seen says it is better to start a plan early to avoid any unneeded complications. Did you make a follow-up appointment?” she asks me innocently enough, but the question only serves to remind me of everything I have to do. “Not yet,” I mutter while scrubbing a fork, trying to take out my anger on the metal utensil. Life can never be simple… Every time I think about scheduling the appointment, my body just tenses up. It’s stressful. “I want to look into a couple of other avenues first. Such as using my magic to heal myself.” “Adagio,” Sunset says in that tired and disappointed tone she uses when she wants to persuade you to do something her way. “You know how skeptical I am about that. We just started using our magic again in general after years. If something happens, I don’t know what to do yet.” Sunset’s eyes turn towards me, looking away from her laptop for the first time in over an hour. “I know that,” I respond with a slightly annoyed voice. “I know. But I was a master of siren magic back in Equestria. I just don’t think it is a good idea to already think about things like operations when we don’t have a lot of savings as it is.” “We aren’t in Equestria, Adagio,” Sunset raises her voice, aggressively rubbing her forehead. “I know we don’t have a lot in the bank right now. That’s scary. But what scares me even more is the thought of not treating this soon enough!” “Do you think I haven’t accounted for that? That scares me too.” The words immediately fly out of my mouth, giving me no chance to think about them. “But I will be fine! I have no intention of leaving anytime soon. I have not come this far to be scared of something like that. I know hundreds of spells. Surely one of them will work.” Before I can react, Sunset stands up from her seat with an angry groan. “And what if you fail? Will we try other options then? What if it is too late? Can you really blame me for worrying? I love you more than-” Both of us immediately stop as we notice the sound of footsteps. After a second, Sonata peaks her head into the kitchen, bleary-eyed. The way she looks at us shows she is clearly confused. “What are you two fighting about?” she asks us with a yawn. My mind draws up blanks in response. Telling her the truth would mean coming clean about my recent diagnosis. I- “We just couldn’t agree on some of Adagio’s strategies for the music studio,” Sunset explains, sitting back down at the table. “It’s nothing too important. I’m sorry we worried you.” “Oh, I wasn’t too worried. You two hardly ever fight anyway.” Sonata’s innocent smile reminds me that these fights we have are pretty seldom. It’s usually something big that causes us to disagree like this… Maybe that’s why I feel so rotten every time I fight with her. “I’m gonna get ready for work though, so no more fighting, got it?” The naive yet sweet nature of her request makes it hard to deny her. Sunset and I give her a small nod before she heads upstairs to take a shower. The silence after is deafening… While sunset would usually be typing away at her keyboard, I don’t hear a single button press. Instead, the room feels suffocating from the tension. Half of me wants to be mad at her, but the other half wishes this whole situation could be avoided. If it wasn’t for the fucking tumor… God. Why does my life have to be complicated? “I’m sorry,” Sunset whispers, making me look over at her. A stream of tears falls down her cheeks, but not a single sound escapes her lips. Her posture is completely still, looking into space. I never want to fight with her. Those tears are the only confirmation I need to know that she also feels that way. Taking a deep breath, I walk over to her, wrapping my arms around her from behind the chair. Sunset’s hand grips my arm tightly with no sign of letting go. In all honesty, I don’t blame her for feeling these things. I just wish all of this was more simple. Cheaper too… “Listen. I know you’re worried. It is okay to feel that way,” I whisper, kissing her tear-stained cheek. “I just want to explore all of our options first. That’s all. I’m not trying to be difficult. I promise.” Sunset nods at my words, her head rubbing against my arm. Her grip lacks the strength of before, but I can tell she still doesn’t want to let me go. “I know how stressful this is. I just wish I could help take some of it away.” For some reason, Sunset’s nuzzling stops as soon as those words leave my mouth. Her hand lets go of my arm completely, searching something new up on her computer. “Sunset, I think we should probably stop searching for-” “You’re right about the stress,” Sunset responds with a quiet yet confident tone. “And I think I know just the thing to help us calm down…” Author's Note So, I want to point out that I know these chapters are short. I promise the next chapter will be longer than a thousand words. However, the reason why I made these two short is because I really wanted to get them both out by October 15th! This chapter marks 100 chapters for the Sundagioverse series on the third anniversary of its creation! I hope you all have enjoyed this chapter and remember to stay true to yourself! Sunscreen and ConvosChapter III: Sunscreen and Convos “It really was kind of you to invite us over, but Applejack simply could not make it,” Rarity tells us as she sips her cup of water. Normally, the fashionista would be requesting a fine tea or a certain kind of coffee. However, she told us she did not want to excite her nerves before going home. This abnormal behavior isn’t lost on my dear wife. She was probably the most confused about Rarity asking for water. Not to mention her attire is a lot less… flashy. “She isn’t feeling herself. I must apologize on her behalf.” The incredibly formal tone leaving her lips does little to mask the disappointment in Rarity’s soul. There is no need for her to say anything else. Sunset and I both know what she means by that. Applejack has not really been the same in the last few months since her grandmother passed. Still… I was hoping to interact with the cowgirl at least once today. It has been too long since we have exchanged words. “I hope she feels better soon,” I offer my condolences, knowing that my words will not change a thing. Rarity smiles at the notion, nodding her head. “We’re still happy you could come over today. Are you sure you don’t have an appetite?” Rarity waves her head at my inquiry. “Thank you for the concern. I am not hungry though. Enough about me. I’d love to hear about you two,” Rarity expresses with a coo to her voice. “How is the married couple after all? Surely there is some drama to share?” The end of her question is heightened to press us for details. Even when she is sullen with her girlfriend’s situation, Rarity is still a gossip queen. “Just because we’re married doesn’t mean that we suddenly have interesting news to share,” Sunset comments, lying as easily as sleeping. Although, sleeping is incredibly difficult for some people like Aria… “I’m surprised you and Applejack aren’t married by now, Rarity. You two were in love far before Adagio and I even became friends. All the way back during high school.” “It’s not from a lack of desire, darling. We just haven’t had the time. Every time we get close to talking about something like that, something serious happens. Like the time Sweetie Belle had a musical showcase that she asked me to design ensembles for.” Rarity moves her hand in a circular motion to convey the consistent events that have stopped the mere idea of marriage. “That and we have some items of interest to settle before we go on such a venture. I’m sure you two lovebirds did something similar.” Sunset looks at me with a curious eye, wondering what I have to say. When it came to our marriage, Sunset and I did not have much we needed to do before getting married. I mean, I apologized to a lot of people and we went on the trip to find Aria and Sonata, but that wasn’t something we needed to plan for. Sunset proposed to me and I agreed. As simple as that. “I’m not sure I follow,” I state in response, grabbing Sunset’s hand. “All we did before we were engaged was live together in an apartment. There wasn’t much we had to settle.” “That’s simply not true, darling,” Rarity insists with a tone that implies my claim is false. “You both bought a house together and the music studio you run. Then we went across the country to find your missing friends. I would say that qualifies as pieces of the puzzle you needed to finish before your vows.” Rarity smiles at me with a smug look, seemingly proud that she dismantled my point. “Every couple has interests that they need to work on before they even think about marriage or any other similar ritual. My dear Applejack and I have to figure out a few things like whose place we will sell and if we should wait until after Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom move to college in a month.” “Yeah, wouldn’t want the brats to get in the way of a honeymoon, huh?” a gruff voice comes from behind Rarity. All of us look towards Aria, standing behind the couch in an oversized tee shirt and pajama pants. Surprisingly, she walks around and sits beside Rarity, taking a bite of a cracker. Where she got the cracker remains a mystery to me. “Hi, Rarity. I didn’t know you were coming over,” Aria states with an actually pleasant tone. “Are those my pajama-” Before Sunset can finish her question, I nudge her to stop. We can handle it later. “Sunset and Adagio invited me. But you must tell me how that piece you asked me to make for you fit. Did I tailor it to the right size?” Rarity asks Aria excitedly, making Sunset tilt her head in confusion. Sunny seems like she is about to ask me what is going on, but I shake my head. I am just as confused as she is… For some reason, Aria’s face turns bright red. Her eyes widen and I can almost see her sweat. “Uh… It was great. Thank you again,” Aria awkwardly responds, trying to shut down this particular topic. “You asked for new clothing from Rarity? What was it exactly?” Sunset asks her, oblivious to the nervous expression on Aria’s face. It’s not exactly a surprise. Aria and Rarity have been spending more time together and Aria has even helped her with some seasonal outfits. Aria has developed more of a fashion sense and the two of them seem to connect on their flashy personalities and somewhat entitled viewpoints. I may have an ego, but both of them are a different kind of confident than I am. Aria has even been showing Rarity some hardcore rock music. In a way, it’s nice to see Aria getting along with her. “Oh, that’s kind of priva-” “She asked me to make her a stunning piece of lingerie,” Rarity says with a prideful look. “All black of course. It was detailed enough that I wish I had made a copy for myself. And it was so romantic because she wanted it to impress Sonata. You should have seen some of the other pieces she asked me to-” Rarity’s mouth is instantly covered by Aria’s hand, a gaze of hellfire coming from her. I honestly did not expect that to come from Rarity’s mouth. Nor did I think Aria would ask for something like that. Rarity can make those items…? I… No, not right now. “I didn’t ask for anything else,” Aria tells Sunset and I while her eyes remain locked on Rarity. “Isn’t that right? Don’t make me burn your hard work.” The fashionista looks at us before giving a small nod, finally prompting Aria to remove her hand from her lips. “Yes, that’s right. Nothing else.” Rarity nods her head slightly, taking a breath. “Regardless, I’m glad you are happy with it. You really must tell me if there is anything else you wish to see brought to life. Your sense of design is very creative.” Aria seems to shrug the compliment off, but I can tell it genuinely touched her. “Thanks. Are we still on to look over some of your dresses this Saturday?” Aria stands up from her seat, taking Rarity’s now empty cup. “Of course. Tell Sonata she is welcome too,” Rarity emphasizes with a smile, but Aria shakes her head. “Sonata has plans with Pinkie Pie that day. And these two wives are planning on doing something for the next week as well,” Aria comments while looking over at Sunset and me. Rarity tilts her head, intrigued by the insinuation. “Really? What are you planning to do, Sunset?” My wife sheepishly smiles at Rarity’s inquiry, even though this was her idea. Now is not the time to lose conviction. “Well, Adagio and I have been pretty stressed for a… couple of weeks. I was thinking that she and I could take some time off. Just a few days.” Sunset shrugs slightly, seemingly backing down. Nudging her, she looks at me before taking a breath. “We were thinking of just going out camping unless those cruise tickets you offered me a few weeks ago are still on the table?” From what Sunset told me, Rarity offered her two spare tickets for a cruise that she was going on with Applejack. Funnily enough, she offered those two days after I told Sunset about my… condition. So, she refused them. It was Sunset’s idea that something like this could help resolve some of the stress between us. I’m not convinced… I still think Sunset and I need to have a discussion about how we feel and how we will go forward instead of avoiding the problem with a small getaway. Even then, it is unlikely Rarity still has those spare tickets considering it is only a couple days away. “I gave those tickets to Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy,” Rarity responds with an understanding tone. “But you could take the ones I was going to use with my darling. Applejack told me she wasn’t going on the cruise and…” Rarity takes a moment to compose herself after a small voice crack. “Let’s just say that I am planning on staying with her in case she needs me.” Rarity reaches into her purse, laying down two pieces of paper onto the coffee table. “Oh, Rarity. You don’t have to. I was just wondering, that’s all. You should really try to convince Applejack to go with you,” Sunset immediately insists, but Rarity shakes her head. “Sunset, I don’t quite feel like going this year. Really, this is a blessing. They won’t go to waste after all. I need to be here for Applejack.” Rarity smiles at us before surprise spreads across her face. Her eyes look over at Aria’s hand on her shoulder, a gesture that bewilders me as well. “I’m sorry. About your whole… situation,” Aria tries her best to offer her condolences. “Tell Applejack that we should all hang out again sometime. Don’t tell her that was my sappy idea. Blame it on uh… Sunset.” Aria averts her gaze, walking towards the kitchen before any of us can show gratitude towards her action. “Thank you for the concern, dear. You really are more kind than you like to admit,” Rarity compliments her, causing Aria’s body to immediately jerk straight. Her now rigid form turns towards us with the most awkward face, trying her best to not cringe. “I-I am not nice. That shit’s sappy. Just… yuck.” Aria brings her hands to her face in annoyance, making an audible slap. “Let’s just hope you don’t have any other family troubles so I won’t have to be nice.” “Yes… Let’s hope indeed. I’m not sure my darling and I could handle more grave news this year. Whether it be illness or… worse,” Rarity mentions with a morbid smile on her face before seemingly trying to shake some sense into herself. Her words cause my chest to tighten, my air flow halting. It’s almost ironic that she mentioned illness. I know she does not mean it in that way. She would obviously want to hear about the situation that we are going through, but… I don’t want her to hear it. As someone who loves the appearance of gold and diamonds, I can adequately say when something seems a little tacky. Whether it is because the owner decided to use the material fruitlessly or due to a mishap in design, I can almost always notice when these symbols of wealth are used incorrectly. The ship in front of me is one such case. While it is big with many different windows, the gold that ordains each one is clearly fake, even from a good distance away. I suppose that is necessary since gold is not the strongest metal out there. It would also incentivize thieves to try and steal window frames of all things to make a quick fortune. Still… The vessel could have used a different appearance to make the ship look nice. Instead, they went with a cheapy, shiny replica of gold, making it more of an eyesore from land. The color is off by five shades, which shouldn’t piss me off, but it does. “Someone looks a little grouchy,” Sunset’s voice breaks me from my thoughts, making me turn my gaze towards her. A smile is bright on her face, unlike the past couple of weeks. Maybe it’s because of the fights we’ve been having, but it’s nice to see her trying to ignore the obvious tension strewn about our lives. Her finger presses my nose as if it is some sort of button, making me simply narrow my eyes. It’s times like these that I wonder if she has some elaborate plan in mind or if she is just being stupid… It’s not like I would stop loving her either way. “You’ll just make fun of me,” I respond, trying to excuse my expression. Sunset vehemently shakes her head. “You ask me what I’m thinking about all the time, but it’s wrong when I ask?” She pulls my arm even though her other arm is absolutely covered by holding her purse, the handles of two suitcases, a coat, and a coffee she insisted on buying. Yet she decides to have one hand free to hold mine. Unpractical, but… cute. “I was thinking about the color of the gold trimming on the ship. It’s… off,” I reluctantly admit, motioning my head towards the aforementioned color. I would have used my other hand, but like Shimmer, I am busy holding stuff. Not the same things though. I am in charge of holding all of our paperwork, the sea passes, our personal identification, and, of course, our phones. This stuff isn’t as heavy as Sunset’s toll, but I constantly have to keep a tight grip on them to make sure I don’t drop a single piece of paper. Ideally, using two hands would be a lot easier, but our little embrace makes her happy. Me too… “That’s not bad to think about. Though, I can’t really see what you mean,” Sunset says while squinting her eyes. “You want to take a picture of it to show everyone?” she asks while nodding to the camera hanging from my neck. Another item that Sunset insisted we bring… I mean, this is technically our first vacation if you don’t count our trip across the country to find Aria and Sonata, but still. Even if I do look stunning, it will be a little tiring to take 200 pictures with this hefty camera. However, I can think of some particularly fun ideas to do with it~ “I can just take a picture of it with my phone after we get checked. Besides, I-” “YO! DAGI! SUNNY!” a raspy voice comes from behind us, making our gaze turn. In a white tank top, jean shorts and flip flops, Rainbow Dash walks up to us with a single suitcase in her hand. Her phone sticks halfway out of her pocket, a laughable downside to the shorts she chose to wear and women’s fashion in general. Standing beside her, Fluttershy wears a green dress and white sandals, two big travel bags following behind her. The sheer size comparison between their luggage is comical. Part of the reason Sunset and I only have two bags is because we planned on sharing bath supplies and some other things. Not to mention Sunset is making me wear a backpack. Needless to say, it does not fit with my attire, but all is fair in travel struggles I suppose. “I didn’t know y’all were coming on this trip! Does Rarity know?” Dash asks us with a laugh. “Rarity isn’t coming actually,” Sunset nervously responds, making me shrug. “She and Applejack had to cancel last minute due to previous obligations,” I lie, trying to make Sunset feel more comfortable. “Rarity decided to give us the tickets.” At least that part is the truth. “She mentioned you two were coming. Funny. I thought cruises like these were more of a romantic and family thing,” I briefly tease Dash, making her open her mouth. “Huh?! Wait, is this a couples cruise? I just wanted to get some sun,” Dash stammers in a confused manner. “She’s teasing you, Dash,” Fluttershy reassures her, giggling to herself. “You look nice today, Adagio. I love the sandals you picked.” Today? Did I look bad on other days…? I mean, I have had nose bleeds and nausea recently. Did she notice my pale skin on one of those bad days? No… She doesn’t know. She can’t. I haven’t told her. It’s just a simple compliment. She doesn’t mean anything else by it. This is Fluttershy. She would be absolutely terrified and worried beyond comparison if I told her, so clearly she isn’t alluding to that. I guess that also confirms that she’s a real friend of mine too since she would be worried for me. “Thanks~ I tried to pick something that would be fashionable, but sturdy enough to walk around in for a while. Though, they don’t make me feel as powerful as boots,” I state with a smirk, making Sunset laugh a little. Even though I act confident, it takes a little bit to get rid of particularly troublesome thoughts. “Dash, are you sure you will get by with just that?” I ask while nodding to her small luggage. “Totally! I don’t need as much stuff to enjoy a good time like you girls,” Dash proudly states while bringing her hand to her chest as if she is some superhero. “I made sure to pack enough toothpaste and shampoo this time,” Dash starts to list off while Fluttershy mouths to us that she did not, in fact, pack enough for the trip. “I also have my phone for pictures, so I didn’t need to ask my mom for her camera.” Fluttershy again silently tells us that she will likely ask us for our camera for any picture she wants to take. “And I counted out every outfit so that I won’t run out of clean clothes.” Despite Dash’s prideful smile, Fluttershy mouths that Dash never packs enough and she makes sure to bring any extras that she or Dash will need. Honestly, this just makes me wonder how many school trips and family vacations they have been on together to make Fluttershy this prepared for her friend’s clumsy behavior. “And we’re all really inspired,” Fluttershy says while trying to nudge Dash towards the building to get on board. “We all should get in line. I kind of want a small nap before we do anything else if you all don’t mind.” “I don’t get how you could be tired. I’m running on pure energy right now,” Dash tells her with a smile. A lot of that energy could either be attributed to her magic or energy drinks she consumed right before getting here. “Fluttershy’s right,” I tell Sunset with a nod of my head. “My hand is getting tired of holding all of our important stuff. You know, the things we NEED to get in.” “Oh, you poor soul,” Sunset teases me before pressing her lips against mine, making a wave of sparks surge through me. That’s unfair, but I love it. “Nevermind the fact that I am carrying-” “Okay, I get it,” I interrupt her, not wanting to hear the whole list. “That’s just another reason for us to follow them.” Holding her hand tightly, I guide her, hoping the line won’t take too long. Focus on calming thoughts. Like the pool. A bed. Sunset’s tan. A bed… Maybe a nap doesn’t sound so bad. Author's Note After almost two and a half months, I have finally updated the Sundagioverse. It may not be a long chapter, but I finally feel some of my writer's block is gone. Just in time for my birthday today~ Yes, I wrote my own birthday present. No, that's totally not weird... Right? Regardless, enjoy the Sundagio snack! New Surroundings, Old ProblemsAuthor's Note Happy New Year, everyone! I may not be uploading this at exactly midnight for some of you, but it is close enough for most of us! I hope you all enjoy this year more than 2024. Here's some Sundagio to welcome the next year and what it holds! New Surroundings, Old Problems Chapter IV: New Surroundings, Old Problems Setting the camera down on the nightstand, I honestly can’t help but feel a little uneasy. The last time we stayed in rooms like these, I was handcuffed to the bed. I don’t know what I was expecting, but rooms on a cruise remind me a lot of hotel rooms. Except this time, there are more items with a sea aesthetic. Almost as if Sonata had to design a bedroom based on her restaurant chain. Even though I feel slightly off, I try my best to remind myself there will be lots of things to do on this trip. I can’t let myself feel trapped already or I will just drive myself insane. The sound of a zipper brings my head back down to reality. Turning, I see Sunset closing one of our bags, crouching down next to one of the drawers of a dresser. Like most other pieces of furniture, the dresser is also bolted down. The way the light cascades down her back, highlighting her form, almost makes her look… angelic. I don’t believe in angels, but she is the closest person I can describe as one. It still surprises me to call her my wife for two reasons. For one, I can barely believe I’m married in the first place since I never imagined I would let myself get tied down by someone. Two, she’s the best person I could have been with. The only person I would actually marry to begin with… For a pony-turned-human who almost took over a school and then took away my magic, she’s not that bad. Plus, she’s all mine. I bet some people have gotten jealous about that. Maybe it goes both ways considering how many people swooned over me at my nightclub job. Ew… Maybe Sunset is lucky to have me as well. We’re both lucky to have found each other. And that she made me listen to her in the first place. “And that is all of our bags unpacked,” Sunset says in a prideful tone, turning her head to me. Her smile quickly disappears when her eyes meet mine, looking a little confused. “Why are you looking at me like that?” “Oh, just admiring you,” I say quietly, walking over and sitting on the front of the bed. “Is that such a crime?” Despite all the fights we’ve had recently, I… I still feel really grateful to have someone like her. “Like I’m the one worth admiring,” Sunset giggles, sitting down on the ground in front of me. “I’m lucky to have a wife like you. For someone as beautiful and stunning as you, I should be the one admiring you,” Sunset mentions with her eyes lovingly glued to my own. It’s not good for her to say things like that. She just ends up feeding my own ego. In all actuallity, I love being told what she thinks of me. “Really? You haven’t ‘admired’ me much since my birthday,” I tease her while crossing my legs. “We’ve been pretty busy all things considered.” Busy with blood, sweat, and tears... I cross my arms to pretend like I’m closing myself off, Sunset gingerly bringing her hand to my knee. “I know. It’s just been a lot,” Sunset whispers, trying to explain the stress we’ve gone through. “But I really am lucky to have someone so beautiful, confident, and determined by my side,” she says with a smile, holding my hanging foot with her other hand. Slowly, but surely, she unstraps the sandal I have on, pulling it off of my foot. After setting the shoe on the ground, she holds it again, pressing her thumb to my sole while gently kissing my knee. Despite the act, I know she is still worried deep down. But it is nice to have her try to push it aside. To treat me normally. Not fragile. Her wife. Someone to be treasured, not necessarily protected. “You’re so beautiful,” she whispers in a surprisingly smooth tone. Her hands guide my foot to the ground, taking off my other sandal. Sunset said that some time away would help us to connect again, but I wasn’t expecting it to be the moment we got in our room. Is it because she is truly enchanted by the sight of me? Or is it due to her pushing her worry down as much as she can? My body instantly freezes when her lips press against my thigh just above my knee. I can almost feel every cell of my back tense up, the hairs along my neck standing. Sunset’s eyes look up at mine, a humorous stare in them. She enjoys the reactions… “Shut up,” I whisper, her hands quietly moving to my shin. Pretending like she is massaging me, she takes the moment to feel the curves of my leg. “I didn’t say anything,” she responds, a knowing look in those eyes. Her fingers quietly press into my calf. She knows how to press my metaphorical buttons. “Your eyes did.” I look down at her with a frown, pretending to be displeased. She knows though. She knows how I feel. How my body is surprised despite expecting each touch. “Be happy. You’re the only person I react like this for,” I tell her quietly, making her giggle. “So, if it was anyone else touching you like this, you wouldn’t be so tense? Waiting for what they may do next?” she asks hypothetically. She should know my answer already. “If anyone else was sitting in front of me, rubbing my leg, I would probably kick them,” I state blatantly, trying to ignore the way my body is hyper aware of her every touch. “True,” she laughs, bringing her lips closer to my knee again. “One jolt and you would probably break their teeth if they did something like,” bringing her lips down, she kisses my knee, making an audible sound as she pulls her lips just enough to break contact, “this~” Kissing my knee again, she closes her eyes, her hands moving up to my hips. Pulling herself up, Sunset looks directly in my eyes before locking her lips with mine. “I-” A loud ringing causes both of us to stop. Turning to look at Sunset’s purse, a sigh exits both of our lips. Even though we could ignore it, I hardly think that is wise. Hesitantly pulling her hands off of me, Sunset grabs her purse, pulling her phone out. “It’s Fluttershy,” Sunset tells me before answering the phone. I’m not surprised since I figured she might want to meet with us after we got done unpacking. Still… I wish she could have called thirty minutes later. “Hmm? Yeah, we can totally go to lunch with you and Dash,” Sunset replies to Fluttershy, briefly covering the receiver with her hand. “You should start getting ready,” she mentions to me quietly. I simply shake my head, using my hand to tell her to go. “You can go without me. I have something to take care of. I’ll catch up in about fifteen minutes,” I try to reassure her, making Sunset raise her eyebrow. “Alright. If you need any help, just text me,” she tells me quietly, finally removing her hand from the receiver. Sunset grabs her purse while reassuring Fluttershy she is on the way. Sunset gives me a small wave before quickly walking to the room of our door. “Yeah, I heard there are a lot of options. I’m sure-” her voice gets cut off by the heavy door closing, a mechanical lock letting me know I am alone. A small sigh leaves my lips as I look down at my legs. I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy that, but I figured we would probably meet with Dash and Fluttershy after we got settled in. That little moment she initiated was still fun. Standing up, I take a deep breath, feeling the magic in my body stir to life. Resonating a steady hum in my throat, I do my best to replicate a healing tune. The problem is that it has been a while since I have had my magic in the first place. Not to mention I hardly had a reason to practice healing spells since I was immortal. Now… That notion is being challenged. Walking into the bathroom, I maintain my hum on the way to the sink. The past few times I have done this, there was a mess following afterward due to the spells messing with my body in an unforeseen way… As soon as I look at my reflection, I can already see a crimson red painting my upper lip. Grabbing some disposable paper, I gently clean up the nosebleed. I’m not surprised honestly. I remember the spells, but practicing them is not going to be perfect. This is not as simple as mending a cut either… It’s like I have to reverse engineer the spell to actually attack certain parts of me. Cut out the cancer if it can. That’s the problem. The cancer isn’t necessarily made up of sick cells. Just mutated ones. So healing spells aren’t going to do much. I need to change the spells I know to replace the mutated cells. That may be easy when renewing a lost finger, but removing a chunk of my mind and replacing it is a different story. A fresh drop of blood falls onto the white countertop, convincing me it is time to stop. I make a mental note of what tune I just used and the consequences. If it was any other part of my body, I may be tempted to use my magic to destroy it only to make it anew. Obviously, doing that with my brain would be… ill-advised. Bad arm? Just use some of my more extreme spells to fix it. But that can’t be done with my brain… In a way, it almost seems like a cruel joke that the cancer appears in the one place my newly-restored magic can’t invade. My legs start to feel numb, making me grab onto the countertop. It’s just another side effect of the magic… If I told everyone, I could have the help of Aria and Sonata. They don’t have their magic back yet, but their knowledge would still help. As it currently stands, the only person I have to help me is Sunset. She knows more about pony magic, not… Still, if I can get through this without asking for any more help, that would be better. No need to scare them like I have with Sunset… She’s running herself crazy and I can’t help but wonder what will happen after this cruise. Will she be able to stop worrying so much or will she go right back to where we were? I have no way to know… The sound of water accompanies the joyous yells of people playing with each other. Whether they are couples or families alike, the pool is still a hotspot for people of all kinds. Thankfully, there are also some areas where it is quiet like the sun chairs off to the side. As the sun blankets my skin in a warm embrace, I can’t help but look skeptical towards the water. Rainbow Dash has just finished going down the water slide for the sixth time, her hair absolutely soaked. Multiple times, she has done somersaults in the water while Fluttershy has been sitting at the edge of the pool with her legs in the cool oasis. She has applauded Dash each time she went down the slide, even though it’s not a big deal. Even kids complete the slide with no problem. It would be a bigger issue if a slide was supposed to be hard to finish. Sunset, on the other hand, has been trying her best to enjoy the pool to the fullest. Her sunkissed orange skin is easy to spot from anywhere in the pool area. At this moment, it looks like she just got done trying to hold her breath with Dash. Childish, but almost cute on her. Sunset’s hair is soaked as she exits the pool, water dripping off of her. It doesn’t take long for the sun to reduce her to a mildly damp state. Her toned legs are perfectly highlighted by the sun’s rays. I would be lying if I said I didn’t catch a few people staring at her in awe. Some of them were directed at me too, making me wonder who is drawing more eyes. Not that it matters. The only eyes that matter here are hers. “I see you’re enjoying yourself, Alligator,” Sunset teases as she pushes her wet hair behind her shoulders. She gingerly takes the martini from my hand, smelling it before giving me a funny look. “Hmm. I didn’t think you liked vodka,” she states, taking a very small sip of my drink. “I usually don’t,” I respond before taking the drink back. “It’s fine in a martini though. It’s also better if I avoid my favorite since we’re at a pool.” Water falls off of Sunset, her body standing within arm’s reach of my chair. After a few seconds, I can’t quite resist any longer, reaching out and touching her wet leg. “You have been enjoying the water, huh?” I ask while motioning towards her leg, acting like my touch is simply to make a point. Nothing more. It would be weird to admit I like touching her skin. Besides, she had her share of me earlier. “I have. You should join me,” she tells me with a laugh before sitting down on my sunchair beside my knees. A few water droplets from her hair hit my legs, reminding me how cool the pool is. “But if you still want to sit in the sun, you should reapply some sunscreen. Do you need any help with that?” Sunset’s hands hold onto my arm rests, leaning forward to look at me. The way she has her eyes glued on me, I can tell she is trying to ask if she can help me reapply while being the most respectful she can despite the clear lust in her voice. I gently press my finger to her forehead. Of course, she looks very confused by my action. “I can handle it by myself,” I reply with a smirk, leaning forward in my seat to kiss her. “But you could take a break and join me in a hot tub. Or you could leave your wife again to go slide with Rainbow Dash,” I taunt her. Clearly, the choice is not really a big decision to make. If she picked anything other than spending some time in the hot tub with me, I would be surprised. “Aw, why don’t you want to play in the main pool area?” she asks me with a laugh, grabbing the sunscreen despite the fact I said I could handle it. “It could be fun.” “With screaming children? Not likely,” I comment while rolling my eyes. “I prefer the water when it’s more calm. If it was more empty, I might be willing to wade in it with you.” Sunset gently presses the white substance to my thigh, rubbing in the sunscreen with actual intent. The way her hands move tell me she actually wants to protect me from the sun and isn’t doing this just for a feel. But I doubt she isn’t enjoying this. “In other words, you want to be alone with me so you can have me all to yourself,” Sunset teases me while she moves her hands down to my knees. Taking some of the sunscreen, I pour out the contents into my hand, pressing it against my shoulder. “That’s not what I said at all, Sunny,” I tease her back, emphasizing the nickname as a way to make fun of her. “But if you want that, all you have to do is ask.” Sunset gets quiet upon hearing my words. She doesn’t stop the application, but I can tell she isn’t sure what to say. “Still though… Whatever you choose, I hope you’re having fun,” I whisper, finally letting my guard down. As fun as it is to tease her, I also hope this day is going well for her. “I am having fun,” she replies in an adamant tone, her hands moving down to my ankles. “I just want to spend more time with you. It’d mean a lot to me if you’d come spend some time in the water. And I don’t mean a hot tub,” she mentions while nodding her head towards the water slide. The idea itself is a little draining since I can already imagine how tiring it might be. I suppose I should though. She does a lot for me and if she wants to have some fun with me in the water, I should try to enjoy it. “I’ll tell you what,” I whisper, brushing her hair past her ear while bringing my lips close to her cheek. “I’ll do what you want as soon as I finish my drink. Okay? That should give me enough time to let my sunscreen dry~” I gently press my lips to her skin, making her smile genuinely. “Alright. But don’t get a refill, okay? That’s cheating,” she cheekily responds, rubbing her forehead against mine. “Yo, Dagi!” Dash’s voice makes both of us look towards the rainbow athlete coming out of the pool. Of course, she is more wet than a fish. She quickly makes her way to us, smiling like she just finished something impressive. “Do either of you have your phones?” Her strange question makes Sunset look towards me. I give her a small shake of my head before returning my gaze to Rainbow Dash. “We’re at a pool… We left our phones in our room,” I explain as if trying to make a kid understand why bringing a device to an area with a lot of water is a bad idea. “Damn. I was hoping one of you could help me with something. I want to go down the slide again and I wanted a video of it,” Dash mentions with a slightly deflated tone. “Flutters also locked her phone in her room even though all she’s been doing is kicking her feet in the water.” Dash uses her thumb to point back at our friend, rolling her eyes slightly. Taking a deep breath, I finish applying my sunscreen before sipping the last of my drink. “I’ll get my phone. Just give me ten minutes you show off,” I mention as I stand up, making Sunset look a little conflicted. “I promise I will play with you once I’m done helping Dash. It won’t take too long,” I whisper to my wife, gently squeezing her hand. “Cool! Don’t take too long, got it? I want to get some sick footage soon,” Dash remarks while stretching her muscles. I can’t help but roll my eyes with a playful smile while I grab my sea pass. Shaking my head, I walk away from them. I leave my flip flops and towel by my sunchair, hoping it will deter anyone from taking my place. Although, with the number of children running around, I wouldn’t be surprised if one of those brat- No, it’s fine. It will be fine. No reason to get angry yet. I’m lucky that I’m not actually wet yet. If I was, this walk would be a lot colder due to the wind. Once I actually get into the pool, it won’t be the same story. After a few minutes, I make it up some stairs to the next level where our room is. I look over the edge of a balcony area above the pool, finding Sunset easily. She’s gone back to the water, seemingly finished convincing Shy to get in with her. Although, all Fluttershy really does is wade her body beside the wall of the pool. Smiling, I lean my arms against the railing. Even though we left port a few hours ago, Sunset seems to be making the most of her time here. We have a little more than a week though, so there’s no need to enjoy all the activities in one day. “I’ll be back in just a minute,” I say to myself, pretending that she can hear me. I quickly turn around and walk to the door of our room. It unlocks easily with just a tap of the sea pass to the lock. What’s that ringing…? Opening the door, I hear my phone’s ringtone clearly, loudly bouncing off the walls. Who is calling now? I would have expected to lose service this far out. Did I connect my phone to the ship’s internet? That doesn’t matter right now. Moving to my side of the bed, I grab my phone and answer it without looking at the name. “Hello?” I state while trying to hide the fact that I rushed to the phone. How long has it been ringing…? “Adagio, for fuck’s sake,” Aria’s voice comes in clear, despite how far off coast I am. “I have called you six times. Where were you?” she asks in an accusatory tone. “I was at the pool. On a cruise. A place where I likely won’t be answering my phone much,” I respond with a similar annoyed voice, walking over to the window. As much as I want to insult her, I take a deep breath. If she’s called six times, this must be important. “What’s going on?” “Listen, you know your first big client you got recently? Their first recording date is tomorrow,” Aria mentions with a hurried breath, almost like she’s been panicking. “Yes, I know. We talked about it. Miss Scratch and Miss Melody are understanding people, so if you need me to be there, I’m sure you can postpone-” “That’s not it,” Aria interrupts me, a long pause following her words. Watching the water, I listen intently for what her concern is. “I know this is a big contract for you. It’s the first contract you have gotten for the studio. I don’t want to screw anything up since you made a good impression on these clients. What exactly do I do?” From her voice, I can tell Aria is stressed, trying to do her best for my sake. I have already told Aria all of this before, but it will probably help her if I just walk her through it again. Pressing my hand against the glass, I close my eyes. “Okay. Are you at the studio?” I ask her quietly, trying to envision the equipment in front of me. “Yes. I’m in the booth. I just need to know what to do,” Aria explains as if she is in a hurry even though she has until tomorrow to get this right. “Alright. Listen closely. This took me a while to get right when I bought these tools.” Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes. Hopefully she can get this right first try. “First, make sure you turn the microphone on…” A gentle clink comes from the two glasses of wine. Sunset pulls her glass away, the yellow light of the hot tub illuminating her face from below. Surprisingly, no one else is around on the deck. While the pool is closed, I was almost expecting a few other people to be out to enjoy the stars. Then again, it is two in the morning. I’m grateful for the solidarity. It gives me some time with her alone, even if there are probably cameras everywhere. “Well, Miss Dazzle?” Sunset asks, smiling as she sips her wine. “Have you enjoyed the first day? Despite some slight hiccups, I think it’s been pretty nice.” Why would she refer to me so professionally? I prefer hearing her call me Alligator if we’re using titles other than our first names. “Not as much as you have clearly,” I respond with a chuckle, drinking my own wine. It tastes almost bitter, but sweet at the same time, reminding me of a variety of fruits. Typical. Red wine isn’t usually my alcohol of choice, but it is still good depending on the situation. If anything, today has been more stressful than I’d like. The process of getting on this ship was longer than I would have liked. The different symptoms I’ve dealt with have made it harder than I would like. And I had to talk Aria down from her anxiety. I’m sure the next few days will be better, but it has been more stress than relaxation in all actuality. “What’s with that frown?” Sunset moves closer to me, her eyes inspecting my face as if that would tell her what she wants to know. “Are you still thinking about earlier? You told Aria exactly what to do. It should be okay.” Despite her reassurance, I can’t help but wonder if she just jinxed us. “There’s just been more stress today than I thought there would be. Makes it a little difficult to relax when something is constantly on my mind.” Sipping my wine again, I rest my head on her shoulder, looking up at the moon. “Still though. I’m glad you’re having fun. You’ve been way too… tense lately.” The deck of the cruise is quiet save for the sound of the ocean. Sunset’s usual lively demeanor has been replaced by a more silent and thoughtful one. “I know,” she whispers in response, leaning her head against my own. “I’m sorry… For fighting with you so much. I’m just…” Sunset’s words stop, leaving an empty silence in the air. Even though she’s stopped talking, both of us can tell what she means. She’s afraid… As much as we can pretend that nothing is happening, we both know it’s there. The thing we’re both trying to run from at the same time. “I’m scared. I don’t know what to think. I swing from one emotion to the next because I know that I have to do something.” “You don’t have to,” I respond quietly. The overwhelming truth of the matter is the fact that she can’t do much. Not yet anyway. Maybe there’s something she can do when it comes to using magic, but I still have testing to do. In the grand scheme of things, she can’t do anything right now. Maybe not ever. So, is it fair of her to keep trying? “Don’t you realize I do?” she asks me in a voice that sounds close to breaking, keeping herself from crying but still showing the erupting emotion of her heart. “I love you too much.” Lifting her head, Sunset brings her hand to my chin, making me look at her. “After everything that’s happened between us, I can’t bear losing you again. Not like this. If there’s anything I can do, I will find it. You can’t stop me from looking because… You mean everything to me.” A singular tear slides down her cheek, but a loving smile reassures me that everything she said is true. No matter how I try, she will continue to worry. She will not stop doing everything in her power to help me. As much as I hate how fragile she makes me feel, I know I can’t stop her from doing what she can to help. In a way, it’s one of the many reasons why I love her so much. Her kindness. Her brave nature that refuses to give up in adversity. “I love you more than the whole world…” Pressing my lips to hers, my heart flutters to her words. It’s funny to think that the feeling of her kiss can still cause so many jitters. Her words, as simple as they are, show how much I mean to her. While I have no idea why that’s the case, it’s nice to have someone care that much. Someone like her. I still don’t want her to worry so much, but that’s simply because I care about her too. “You’re my everything too,” I whisper, breaking our kiss. Bringing my hand to her cheek, I close my eyes. It’s nice to hear those things. I just wish I could make this situation easier on us. Sunset’s hand wraps around my body, pulling me close to her. She plants smaller kisses upon my cheek, trailing down to my neck. “Let’s stop thinking about… this,” Sunset responds in an equally quiet tone, yet carrying a level of optimism. “We’re here to try and relax. So, as fleeting as this time is, let’s enjoy it~” Pulling away, Sunset drinks the rest of her glass, smiling at me. “What do you say to getting ourselves a little more wine before going back to our room? Then we could… take each other’s swimsuits off to ‘wash the chlorine out of our hair’. Have a little fun.” Sunset shakes her empty glass in her hand, making me giggle a little. Her clear innuendo may be cheesy, but it’s enticing coming from her. “As long as you, Miss Shimmer, promise to cuddle with me afterward,” I request, drinking the last of my wine. Sunset simply gives me a familiar smirk, kissing me once more. “It would be my pleasure~” FragilityChapter V: Fragility My hair falls against my face and the pillow as I let myself hit the bed. Sunset giggles, brushing my hair away. In just as quick of a motion, she wraps her lips around my own. Both of us can’t help but laugh between our kisses. Even though we need to get to sleep at some point tonight, she still seems full of energy. She also intends to use all of it on me specifically. I don’t hate the attention though. If anything, I have craved attention my whole life. But when it comes from her, it feels special. “I love you so much,” Sunset whispers, a smile still present on her lips. She starts to slow down our kisses, but her body still tells me she is enjoying this closeness with me. I don’t blame her. The scent of her hair reminds me of nights past. Nights of desire and times where I felt safe. In a way, it also brings back memories of the nights I did not have her in my arms. Nights I never want to repeat. Unfortunately, the momentum begins to slow down between our lips. Her hand gently holds my shoulder before she finally breaks out contact, her eyes opening to stare at my own. Her look is full of love, warming my body. “What?” I ask quietly. “Why are you looking at me like that?” “I’m just… thinking,” she murmurs softly. “I don’t deserve your support. You’ve always been there for me, regardless how busy I am.” I can’t help but raise my eyebrow at her statement. Is she misremembering? She has been here for me more often. Right? “You’re mistaken,” I gently remind her, pushing myself up to be at her eye level. “You’ve supported me through equally as much if not more. It’s hard for me to remember how I’ve paid back that kindness.” “It’s unlike you to be so modest,” she teases me, her hand brushing my damp hair away from my eye. “What? Do you want to be reminded of your good deeds?” she asks me in the same joking tone. Sitting down on the bed in front of me, Sunset never breaks eye contact with me, but she is clearly thinking of the right thing to say. “Well, firstly, you’ve always supported my educational pursuits. I’m about to get my master’s degree and finally get a job as a therapist. It has taken up a lot of our time and caused it to be hard to be intimate at times, but you never complained. Instead, you did everything you could to help me. You even got me a motorcycle so I wouldn’t have to stand around waiting for the bus all day.” “Okay, fine. But that’s not exactly equal to everything you’ve done for me,” I reply with a roll of my hand, trying to emphasize the disparity. “You helped me learn true happiness after all. And you gave me the best gifts I have ever received,” I tease her while connecting our lips again. Sunset giggles slightly to herself. “Yeah, but you were the one who went out of your way to buy a dance pad for a game we could play together just because you remembered I liked it.” Her finger pokes my shoulder, making both of us laugh. “Did you also forget you gave me some pretty great gifts too?” she asks before leaning towards her purse, pulling out a gold bracelet with a red gemstone of a sun with a purple musical note. That was an anniversary gift I commissioned a few years ago. To be honest, I’m surprised she risked bringing it on a trip like this where it could get lost. “Not to mention you bought me the latest Playstation because my last console broke.” That was before we even moved into our house. Back when we were in an apartment together. I’m surprised she would bring that up since it is relatively small considering everything else we’ve been through together. “Playing games is one of your hobbies. What was I supposed to do? Watch the love of my life drown in her own stress?” I ask while rolling my eyes, making Sunset push me slightly. “But that’s the thing. You didn’t have to. It wasn’t my birthday or the holidays. You did it simply out of care for me.” The way she talks is evident that this is sure to turn into another war of ours where we try to convince each other why one of us loves the other more. Still… It isn’t necessarily a bad feeling. It’s nice to hear how much she loves me. And she is right deep down. Both of us would give the world for each other. “You’re the same person who was willing to risk everything to help me buy the music studio. All because I have faith that it can be a success,” I whisper in response. The soft orange light from the lamp beside me illuminates her eyes while also being dark enough to make us feel alone. The way she looks in my eyes is pitiful as if I am poorly mistaken, her fingers trailing down my cheek. “That’s because I know that you will be a success.” Her words are soft. Tender. Touching my soul effortlessly. From the slight blush on her face, it’s apparent that even she wasn’t prepared to speak that honestly. Her words came straight from the heart without a hint of deception anywhere to be found. “You’re destined for great things, Adagio. I see it every day in the way you smile. The way you flaunt your style. As much as you tease, you have a big heart.” A singular tear slides down her cheek despite the happy expression on her face. However, her smile seems slightly off as she pulls me closer, her eyes still connected with mine. “You can do great things. I just… don’t want the opportunity to be taken from you.” “What are you trying to say?” I ask her, feeling her hand tremble slightly. I probably already know the answer though… “You know what I mean,” Sunset tells me quietly, her tone brutally honest. Her hand trails down to my chest as if feeling for my heartbeat. “I don’t know what I would do. Without you… You’ve become the biggest part of my life. I… I don’t want this to be our last adventure together.” Her eyes look back up at mine, every semblance of glee erased. Now, there’s just a curious and scared stare. “This won’t be our last adventure,” I try to reassure her, shaking my head. “I told you. Stop worrying about me. I will be fine. It’s only been two days on this cruise. I’m not going anywhere.” “It’s not that simple. I can’t just stop worrying completely like it’s some mental switch.” “It’d be easier if you could just trust me when I say I will be okay,” I respond in a slightly annoyed tone. Sunset withdraws her hand, seemingly confused. “You’re the one who is making this difficult. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable in worrying that-” “That what? That I’ll just roll over and die like that? I’ve been alive for thousands of years. Out of everything, this sure as hell won’t be the end of me.” I turn away from her with a sigh, feeling myself get angrier. I just don’t want her to treat me like I’m some fragile toy. I can handle more than this. “Obviously not,” Sunset answers in a huff, standing up from the bed. “I’m just scared, okay? I’m scared since I don’t know what will happen. Something else might come to haunt us and that is the last thing I need.” “Yeah, but I am still okay now. Right here. Right now. All I want is for us to just try and forget about it until we can get home. The last thing I desire is to be treated like some sick dog. I’ll be okay, god damn it,” I let out in an angry breath, turning my gaze back towards her. I immediately stop gritting my teeth when I see her offended expression. “I’m… I’m sorry. I just… I don’t want to be defined by this. I know you can’t stop worrying, but it makes all our memories feel like I am actively being defined by this diagnosis.” Sighing to myself, I shake my head, looking towards the floor. At this point, Sunset has also turned her gaze from me. “I’m sorry I make you feel like that,” she barely responds in a neutral tone, seemingly still processing my words. To be fair, I still need to think about what we just said… Standing up from the bed, I grab my shoes, causing her to look back at me. “What are you doing?” “I need some fresh air. Gather my thoughts.” Taking a deep breath, I look back at her, seeing an understanding nod. “Fine. Can we talk when you get back?” she asks in the same neutral tone, but I can tell she is conflicted. I am too. I’m not quite sure how to feel. “Of course.” The moon’s pale light gives a soft white color to the sand. The waves are calm, but it almost seems like a certain energy is being held back. As if a storm is coming. Even if it does, I should be back in my room by that time… Walking through the water, it occasionally reaches just below my knees. Funnily enough, the air is colder than the waves. Maybe that’s simply because of my rumination. After all, it is difficult to not ponder what Sunset is thinking right now. She’s likely angry. Upset. Sad. But I know she will try to make it right due to her promise to enjoy this trip to the fullest. As if she is the one that needs to apologize… I was too hard on her anyway… “Hey, Dagi,” Dash’s voice comes from behind me, splashing water alerting me to her presence. “When are you coming back? I know the beach is nice and all, but it is getting pretty late. Unless you want to sleep out here,” she laughs, joking as she usually does. However, I don’t turn to face her. I can’t help but shrug, wishing she wouldn’t have come out here. I need some time for my thoughts after all. “Maybe in twenty minutes,” I reply quietly, wading through the water on the coast. From the sound, I can tell Dash is following me. “You look down,” she comments with a neutral tone. Even though she’s following after me, I don’t feel like telling her the specific reason why I’m out here. “Is it because of your fight with Sunset?” I guess she found out from my wife… “Come on. I’m sure that she didn’t mean what she said. She was in the wrong anyway. Let’s go back.” “I wouldn’t exactly say that,” I reply, sighing to myself. “She was just… scared. You don’t need to know why, but that wouldn’t mean she’s in the wrong.” “Sure it does,” Dash replies with an attitude that says she knows better. “Being scared is one thing, but being overprotective is another entirely! I know what it is like with my parents. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if my partner did the same thing.” I can hear Dash’s fist hit her other hand from the iconic slap, displaying her own frustration. “I would be pissed too. She’s not letting you live. And it’s not like she has something to protect you from.” She would be surprised… “She’s just looking out for me,” I reply with a shake of my head. Even if I am angry at Sunset, I shouldn’t air those grievances out with Dash. Sunset is my wife. We respect each other enough to handle our matters privately. “Yeah, but she can’t exactly protect you from cancer. It is something inside after all…” She knows…? Wait… Why would Sunset… I said I didn’t want to tell them. “Something even you can’t control. It’s sad because I thought siren magic was pretty powerful.” It is… It should be. I just… I can’t seem to find the right spell. I never had my health compromised like this before. Nothing has come close to killing me. As it stands, I can use a vast array of spells to destroy, transform, teleport, but… I don’t remember the healing spells. Or at least one that can help me here… “It’s pathetic. You should have told us,” Dash scolds me as if I’m some pet. “What do you know, Dash? All you can do is go fast. You don’t have to search millennia of memories to find a spell you never used,” I snarl at her, refusing to look at her. As if she has knowledge of magic that rivals my own. She only uses it to make herself look better. “She’s got a point though,” Twilight states, making my shoulders tense up. “You should have told us. I could have helped. Sunset knows a lot about magic, but I still could offer my own expertise.” “That’s easy for you to say, Twi,” I mention while rolling my eyes. “This is the exact reason I fought with Sunset. I didn’t want to be treated like I’m some sick dog. I’m the most powerful siren alive. I can handle this.” “And what if you’re wrong?” Applejack asks in a harsh tone. “Ya already see how bad I am with handling my grief. Imagine how much worse it would be if Granny refused to accept any help at the end, working herself to death. Your ego is gonna make it worse.” “Shut up, Applejack. No one asked for your opinion.” I will be fine. I will. My chest feels so tight. “Why can’t you admit it, Adagio? For the first time, you’re afraid of dying,” Aria insults me with an annoyed tone. “We’ve been alive for thousands of years. It’s okay to say that you’ve never thought about it before. I would be scared too.” “You don’t have to be an example. You can stop being so strong,” Sonata practically pleads with me. “We’re your friends. We can help.” “Shut up. For once. Just stop. I don’t need help. I can do this. If anyone can do this, it’s me. I have avoided that so many times. This won’t stop me.” I wrap my arms around myself, shivering at just how cold it is. It feels like winter, yet the water is still a mild cool. It’s almost ironic. Nothing in Equestria killed you, but the biggest threat is your own body now. A small laugh echoes, making me grind my teeth. My own voice taunts me. Maybe you were looking for a challenge. You have your magic back and all your friends. Life is good. But maybe you were bored… Maybe you wished for something challenging. “Shut the fuck up,” I practically yell at all them, the sound of wading water almost deafening by now. “I don’t need this from you. I obviously didn’t wish for this.” Ah, but didn’t you like it when Sunset and the Rainbooms provided some level of difficulty? Don’t say no… You found it too easy to control people. I can feel her breath on my neck, directly chuckling at me. Now, you don’t have Sunset to fight. Something to dominate. For all you know, you made this happen. “I told you to-” reaching into my purse, I pull out my revolver, aiming it behind me. All of the sound caused by the water instantly stops. Where… Where is her taunting face? Where is everyone else? Wait… Why were they here? Everyone else is back in Canterlot City aside from Dash. And that side of me… she’s gone. But she was just here. Wasn’t she? The shiny metal in my hand causes my heart to skip a beat. This gun… Why is it here? Why do I have it? Why would I even try to use it again? I threw it away… I… My legs start to shake under me. Everything feels dizzy. My mind is… foggy. Everything starts to close in. I can feel my legs slip, but everything slows down while I fall. Nothing feels right. This isn’t right… Author's Note Hello, all. So, around two weeks ago, I made a blog post describing how my dog was going to die. On January 7th, my dog passed away. Ever since then, I have been crying on and off and it has emotionally wrecked my heart. However, I am doing my best to move forward like I know he would have wanted me to. He was the best dog I could have ever asked for. Always loyal and happy, making sure I was okay until the very end. I had the idea for this chapter laid out before my dog passed, but only got around to writing it in the past couple of days. It was originally meant to be longer, but I hope you enjoy this update regardless. Blanket of PressureChapter VI: Blanket of Pressure The sound of button pressing makes me open my eyes. On the TV, a hero clad in black fights a villain in green with robots everywhere. The light coming from the screen is the only source of illumination aside from the lamp right beside me. Sunset sits on the other side of the couch, furiously playing with the controller in her hands. Aside from the sound of the game, our living room is quiet. A book rests in my hands. The lamp makes the normally white pages seem yellow. A blanket is wrapped around my legs, making me feel pretty comfortable. It’s nice to rest on my side of the couch like this. Even if nothing is said between us, it still feels incredibly intimate to be able to engage with our hobbies next to each other. Sunset sticks her tongue out in concentration, trying her best to not die to the boss she is fighting. Looking down at the book, I can’t help but raise my eyebrow slightly. “War: What You Need to Know,” I read the title aloud. When did I pick out this book? I don’t remember being interested in reading this. However, it is just as likely that Sunset picked this out. There’s not much harm in giving it a chance though, right? Flipping open the book to the first page beyond the contents, I start to read the words inscribed. Huh. It starts with a description, but it isn’t about war. It’s about- “Ah, damn it… I was so close that time,” Sunset mentions while rolling her eyes, prompting me to look away from the words. “Maybe you should take a break from the game? You’ve been trying that for hours.” Has she? Time has really flown by then. It doesn’t feel like I have watched her for hours. “No way. I solved 243 puzzles to get to this one boss.” Once again, Sunset activates the boss fight, making the green man in a big mech suit come out to play. “You have a checkpoint. You can afford to take a break and catch your breath,” I remind her gently, bringing my eyes back to the book. The words starting chapter one are discussing the shared pain that people endure when it comes to… cancer? “Yes, but do you have that luxury?” My eyes dart up from the book, noticing the TV is off. Sunset looks towards me, but her eyes are emotionless. Empty except for what seems like some sort of resentment. The light from the lamp flickers out as if it is a candle snuffed by the wind. The dark leaves her skin looking like a light gray. “What… What did you say?” “Dagi!” a yell hurts my ear, making me shake my head. Aria stands in front of me, looking angry as usual. Sonata stands with a guitar in her hand, the music studio lights making everything seem brighter. “Where are you? We’re supposed to be working on this new song.” “Yeah, sorry. Just… I feel dizzy,” I reply slowly, looking at the microphone in my hand. The room seems bigger than I remember… “What song are we working on again?” “Holes in Reality? Are you alright, Adagio? We can take a break if you need,” Sonata states in a tone of concern. Reality… That’s ironic. This feels off. Every time I open my eyes, Sonata and Aria move away from me. Wasn’t Aria just wearing a magenta jacket instead of a tee shirt with holes in it? “No. This isn’t right…” Stepping back, I take a deep breath. I don’t think we had a song titled like that. Pushing past Aria, I open the door of the recording booth. A roar of words hits me, the lobby of a hospital makes my head spin. Why am I here? The lobby has an open floor plan where I can see up to… twenty floors…? There’s no door behind me. Just a hard floor leading to waiting areas for the different sections of the hospital. Hundreds of people. My breathing does little to make me feel better. I am constantly lightheaded. God. It almost hurts to open my eyes. The voices of everyone flies around me, despite their static positions. What is going on? Looking up, I see a person with fiery hair walk past me. No, not just a person. Her. “Sunset?” I reach my hand out, taking a step. As soon as my foot touches the floor, my chest tightens, squeezing out the air in my lungs. I instantly gag on something, drool lingering on my lips. Touching it, I see a crimson red staining my fingers. Instead of saliva, blood makes me gag on my own tongue. I… I’m losing strength. Am I… Am I dying? Is this pain… Could this… No. It can’t be. Right? The pain in my chest is so severe… It is taking every ounce of willpower to stop myself from falling over. “Sunset, wait,” I try to call out, but my chest constricts around my heart. I can’t let myself stop. If I do, it feels like I may not have the strength to move again. Despite the pain, cramps, and dizziness, I run forward, pushing through the crowd. I don’t know why, but everything in me is urging me to get to her. Even though my breaths feel like I am inhaling straight carbon dioxide, I keep my pace up. I can’t afford to let myself slow down. The pain… It feels so real. Crushing my organs… I need to get to her. To touch her. To tell her- “Miss, you’re bleeding,” someone gets in my way. I don’t need this. Shoving them out of the way, my arm holds my chest in a desperate attempt to keep myself intact. Multiple hands grab onto me, trying to pull me back. “You need to stop so we can help-” “Let go of me!” Pushing past, it feels like I am trying to avoid being touched every inch I move forward. They won’t help me. This isn’t right. None of this is right. Stopping now is likely going to make it impossible to move again. Despite how painful it is to keep going, I know I can’t slow down. I can barely see her hair through the crowd. Taking a deep breath, I sprint forward, dodging around everyone that tries to grab me. She turns the corner to another hallway. Getting to the corner, I look down the corridor. Water instantly rushes and submerges my legs. Rock walls surround me, making a maze of water. People float along the water that reaches my thighs as if it is some lazy river. Towards the end of this path, there are branching openings. Sunset stands there, seemingly trying to decide where to go. Fuck this… “Sunset,” I try to call out to her, but I cough up more blood. Trudging through the water, I have to push through the people. It’s like everything is specifically made to slow me down. Laughs echo, darkly contrasting my difficulty to breath. Their hands try to grab me again. The water splashes violently against my thighs just as one of them takes hold of my knee. “Rodon,” I strike out with my singular word, my magic instantly lighting them on fire. Turning the corner, I push past the people in the water. Sunset is not far ahead of me, turning to the left this time. I try to grab her shoulder by lunging forward, but she is just out of reach. Looking to the left, I see a steep decline of rapid water that must be two stories tall. Sunset is already at the bottom, unharmed. Pain spreads through my chest from each heart beat, making me wince. Whatever is happening, it feels like it is coming to an end soon… I need to get to her. Taking a deep breath, I let the water sweep me down. In an instant, my body is flung to the side. Fuck! The rock wall shreds into my shoulder. God damn it. Every time I slam into one of the walls, I can feel the searing pain of cut skin. Water overwhelms me, easily making me gag on the way down. My feet hit the hard rock. Water splashes. My arms hit the rock floor, submerging my whole body. A metallic taste fills my mouth as a thousand hands grab me. I can’t stop. I won’t be able to move again if I do. As soon as I break the surface of the water, I take a breath, pushing myself to my feet despite the sheer agony afflicting my body. Blood drips from my lips onto my hand. A dark corridor is laid out in front of me, continuing to a pitch black void. It doesn’t take me even a second to move forward as fast as I can. The dark does not scare me. Whatever is happening to my body does… Coming to a wall of what seems to be confetti strings hanging from the ceiling, I can see brief glimpses of light on the other side. My chest tightens further, strangling my heart… Reaching forward, I push through the obstruction as a wave of light comes over me. Once again, the sight of the hospital lobby greets me. Water and blood drip off of me, none of which seem to be a concern to her. Only a few meters in front of me, Sunset stands in front of the entrance, talking with Rarity. “Sunse-” Thump. Bringing my hand to my chest, it feels like everything is being crushed inside me. I can’t feel a familiar warmth in my veins. Or hear a slight pulsing. I… I can’t feel my heart. There’s no beat. “Sunset-” I try to say, but the last of my energy leaves my body. Every last ounce of adrenaline was used and… I’m too late. I wasn’t fast enough. My body is… Hitting the floor doesn’t even cause much pain to splinter through my body. I can’t feel much anymore. If this is what death feels like, I can’t… I need to… I’m not done. There’s more I need to do. I can’t breathe… All I can do is look at her. As my vision fails me, I see her look towards me, a confused frown being the last clear sight. “What’s gotten into her?” Enough. This twisted vision ends here. Now. I have not come this far to let myself get scared by meaningless ideas. You have no control here… I will not die. Especially like this. None of this is real. This is all in my head. Opening my eyes, I notice that I’m wearing a red dress. All around me is an abundance of black smoke, thick enough to be tangible. A small chuckle leaves my lips, gradually turning into a cackle. Strands of the smoke are tied to each of my fingers. It is absurd to think that this would be enough to hold me down. Humming a tune filled with rage, the smoke is lit aflame, making it disappear from my hands. “In my head,” I whisper to myself, walking forward. Every step makes the smoke retreat ever so slightly. “I’ll be honest, I did not expect it to be this bad so far.” Bringing my hand to the crown on my head, I can’t help but let out another frankly demented chuckle. Nothing about this is funny in a way. It’s just so moronic this is even happening. To think a part of me just tried to kill me. “Nice try. Really. I mean it,” I say in a laugh, knowing that this thing isn’t alive. Or sentient as it may be. “I almost believed that was real. Something tells me the pain was real, all things considered.” Twirling my finger around some of the smoke, I smile to myself. This… disease has infected enough of me. It’s ironic that the only thing that has come close to killing me is myself. Not even the powerful beasts of Equestria stood a chance. I knew I was powerful, but damn. It’s almost hilarious that I am the one who has come close to ending my life. Maybe those years without my magic made me truly forget my power. “You will regret pissing me off,” I whisper, burning more of the smoke. “Trust me, I don’t like to use this kind of language. But I am exhausted from this little game. I fully intend to live for a long time with a very special person.” Flames extend from my fingers. I know I can’t get rid of it, but I can make it slow down. “It’s only a matter of time until I conquer you too.” Swiping my seapass on the door, it immediately unlocks in front of me. I wait a moment to open it, thinking about the right thing to say. It’s only a few hours away from dawn. If she isn’t asleep, I would feel guilty about keeping her up. However, it wasn’t exactly my choice to pass out on a chair close to the front of the ship. It was absurd how I believed the first part of that delusion was real since we haven’t stayed overnight at a beach. It’s only been a couple of days so far and we have visited one other place for a few hours. Pushing the door, my shadow spills out into the room. The light behind me tries to illuminate the dark interior. I quickly make my way inside, closing the door behind me. It’s almost pitch black in here except, making it unlikely that she is still awake. Walking past the bathroom, I see a faint red glow from the alarm clock next to the bed. The lump on the other side of the bed is quiet. Still except for the occasional breath. Sighing to myself, I change for bed silently. I wish I hadn’t made her wait so long. She also didn’t deserve the anger I gave her… I’m sure I can talk with her in the morning though. Slowly lifting the blanket, I slip into the bed. The feeling of an automatic warmth spreading from her side of the bed greets my skin. Sunset is sleeping on her side, facing me. Her breathing is slow and steady. Peaceful… Leaning forward, I gently kiss her forehead, making sure not to wake her. “I am sorry, my sweet summer mist,” I whisper, brushing her hair slowly with my fingers. Of course, she doesn’t answer. Not that I want her to anyway. I want her to get her rest. After a moment, I rest my head down onto my pillow. Closing my eyes, I try my best to slow down my mind. However, a touch immediately breaks me from my attempt to sleep. Arms wrap around me, pulling us closer together. A pair of lips kiss my cheek tenderly. It’s an embrace she repeats a couple of times, making my cheek feel warm. “I’m sorry, Alligator,” she whispers in a tone as sweet as honey. Her arms hold onto me, speaking a thousand words in the stillness. The way she cuddles me is enough to let me know that she has no intention of letting go. “Listen-” “I was wrong,” we both say at the same time, making Sunset’s breath stop for a moment. Turning my head to look towards her, I can barely see one of her eyes. The only thing that lets me know I am looking at the right place is a slight reflection of the red light from that alarm clock. “I’m sorry, Sunset,” I whisper, bringing my hand to her cheek. “I… I’m glad you worry about me. You have shown me more love than anyone else. Even myself back when I was in Equestria. I’m scared too, but…” Pressing my nose against hers, I close my eyes, trying to not let myself tear up. “I won’t let anything take this away from me. You have every right to be scared.” “Adagio, I… You’re right. I am scared.” A gentle kiss is laid bare upon my lips. “But you also had every right to be angry. I shouldn’t treat you like you’re a sick dog every day. I-” Before she can say another word, I press my lips into hers with a tear streaming down my cheek. My arms wrap around her as if she’s about to leave for a long trip, trying to make the most of this one embrace. Trying to imbue each second of this kiss with every ounce of love I have for her. She shouldn’t blame herself. I understand… But no matter what, I will not leave her. Not like this. “You can be scared. You can tell me about it every time you feel afraid,” the words instantly spill out of my mouth as soon as I break the kiss. “I don’t want you to hide it from me. That’s just what I would be making you do if I told you to stop treating me like I’m sick. If there’s anyone you should be able to trust, it should be me.” Kissing her again, I can’t help but let out a small sob. “Sunset, I promise that I will be here for you if you get scared. But I also promise I won’t let this stop us. I just need your help after this cruise.” A tear streams from Sunset’s eye, but a hopeful smile responds to my plea. Her hands practically claw into my back, but I don’t mind. It’s just a sign of how she won’t let go, even if the sun destroyed the Earth. “Alligator, you always have my help,” she whispers, pressing her forehead to mine. “I love you too much to ever leave you on your own." Author's Note Inspired in part by a very real dream I had where I truly felt like I was dying. Funny thing is this chapter was supposed to be longer with more happy fluff, but that dream I had, which was probably inspired by my dog's death, gave me an idea. However, we will get into more fluff later. I hope you enjoyed some good old angst.
Waves Don't DissipateChapter I: Waves Don’t Dissipate The smell of paper is an odd scent. I can’t really tell if it is a good or bad smell. In some ways, the scent of an old book is nostalgic, but is it because of the dust? If it is, then isn’t it a bit weird to like the smell of it? Half the time, it can be overwhelming due to how old the book is, so this whole experience is weird… Even new books have their own distinct signature, letting you know that this particular title was made recently. I have no idea if I seem like a freak for that, but it’s always interesting to go to a book store and peruse their selection of stories from decades ago to now. The book in my hand closes with a resounding clap as a breath escapes my lips. The store has a large selection of titles, but not many of them interest me. I was hoping to find something new and interesting to read during my downtime, but nothing has caught my eye so far. Instead, I’ve run into a bunch of half-baked ideas that try to introduce an interesting twist that I can see from a mile away. Really, why does it seem like every story is trying to be emphatic with their portrayal? Many of these stories have been told better before… Looking to my left, I see Sunset looking through some books in the science section. She already has two books in her arms. Both of them seem to be time periods with some romance plot, judging from the covers. However, the book she is holding onto right now does not have much on the cover except for a few words. “Cancer: What you need to know. Dos and don’ts of care,” I whisper to myself with a slow sigh. The title is dreadfully boring, but the fact that she’s looking at that is concerning… Taking a deep breath, I walk over to her, bumping her shoulder. “We agreed to look at the facts together and to not worry too much about it.” Sunset seems a little startled from my presence, but she gives me a half nod, her eyes still glued to the page. “I know. Just give me a minute…” Her voice is heavy with concern, almost like she is in another plane of existence while she desperately searches the pages for a cure. Something that could help… As much as I appreciate her concern, this can’t be good for her. Every time I turn my back, I catch her looking at something cancer related. Websites, academic journals, medical resources, and now a book. It’s nice to have someone I can rely on, but this kind of stress is eating her up on the inside… It’s only been a couple of weeks too. We still have a lot of time to look at treatments and options. “I hope you remember that I don’t want the others to know,” I whisper to her, closing the book with my hand. “Not yet at least.” Sunset jerks the book away from my hand, opening it again. She walks a few steps away from me, pretending to ignore me. The way her body is so stoic is a false sign of confidence. I know she’s scared… She’s worried beyond comparison and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. At times, this bravado makes me wish that I had not told her, but I know that would have just made things worse… At least with this outcome, I am letting her know I trust her completely to have my back. There’s nothing I can do to lessen the concern. I just have to help her know it is okay to take a moment to breathe. “I know, but I still want to buy this book,” Sunset tells me with a shrug, closing it and adding it to the other two books in her arms. Something tells me that even if I tried, I wouldn’t be able to stop her. “Okay, but keep it out of sight of Sonata and Aria.” I walk beside her towards the front of the store. I can’t lie. This all worries me too, but I’ve mainly been burying myself in my work in the last couple of weeks to avoid the thoughts. The more I’ve thought about it, the less scary it feels. I mean, I’ve got my magic back. I knew hundreds of spells. It’s just a small tumor… All I need to do is find the right spell to use. Sure, magic works differently in this world, but I am still adept at the craft. I did not spend thousands of years perfecting my voice to lose it all. Especially now that I have friends… Now that I have her in my life… “I picked this one out because I thought it would be interesting to read together,” Sunset mentions as she holds up a book about two fantasy elves in a classic illegal love scenario. Romance is something she’s always been hooked on. “Read together?” I ask her with a chuckle, trying to keep the conversation going. The more I can distract her, the less she will worry. Hopefully… Besides, it’s nice to just talk with her. “Yeah~ I was thinking if we have a hard time sleeping, we could cuddle and take turns reading. Even if it is a mediocre story, I’m sure I will love it if it’s an experience with you.” Sunset’s cheeks blush for a moment, turning her gaze away from my own. The idea of a moment like that is cute. Happy. It reminds me of all the memories we’ve made thus far. And all the happy memories we may have left to make… “If the story is the worst of them all, I’m sure it would still be a nice funny memory with you,” I tell her quietly, resting my head on her shoulder. Even though we are waiting in line to buy these books, it feels oddly isolated here. Maybe because it is quiet, but it feels like the only person near me is her. The truth is that she is the only person that matters right now… Sure, my friends deserve to know what is going on, but they can wait a while longer. The last thing I want is a lot of pity and worry flooding my way. Instead, I just want to live my life to the fullest. Looking towards Sunset, her face is so solemn. Quiet… I know that I have to keep going. For her. There’s no way in hell I have come this far just to let her down now… Just to leave her broken. You’ll see, Sunset… There’s no reason to worry. We’ll be okay. Just wait and see.
Take It Out On YouChapter II: Take It Out On You The clatter of silverware hitting the sink rings out in the kitchen. My hands are completely soaked as I scrub a plate clean. It’s almost like whatever gods there are out there are taunting me. Every time I wash the dishes, I always end up making a mess and getting myself wet. Maybe that’s the curse of actually owning a house. You have so many accessories that you need to take care of. Things like the lawn need to be trimmed regularly. In a way, it almost makes me wish we still lived in an apartment. However, the extra space is a welcome change… Especially since Sonata and Aria have been living with us for half a year now. “There’s also the option of taking chemotherapy before operating,” Sunset mentions from the dining room table, scrutinizing every detail on her laptop’s screen. I can’t help but sigh, wishing that Sunset would stop looking at every website known to man that could cover this issue. “Everything that I have seen says it is better to start a plan early to avoid any unneeded complications. Did you make a follow-up appointment?” she asks me innocently enough, but the question only serves to remind me of everything I have to do. “Not yet,” I mutter while scrubbing a fork, trying to take out my anger on the metal utensil. Life can never be simple… Every time I think about scheduling the appointment, my body just tenses up. It’s stressful. “I want to look into a couple of other avenues first. Such as using my magic to heal myself.” “Adagio,” Sunset says in that tired and disappointed tone she uses when she wants to persuade you to do something her way. “You know how skeptical I am about that. We just started using our magic again in general after years. If something happens, I don’t know what to do yet.” Sunset’s eyes turn towards me, looking away from her laptop for the first time in over an hour. “I know that,” I respond with a slightly annoyed voice. “I know. But I was a master of siren magic back in Equestria. I just don’t think it is a good idea to already think about things like operations when we don’t have a lot of savings as it is.” “We aren’t in Equestria, Adagio,” Sunset raises her voice, aggressively rubbing her forehead. “I know we don’t have a lot in the bank right now. That’s scary. But what scares me even more is the thought of not treating this soon enough!” “Do you think I haven’t accounted for that? That scares me too.” The words immediately fly out of my mouth, giving me no chance to think about them. “But I will be fine! I have no intention of leaving anytime soon. I have not come this far to be scared of something like that. I know hundreds of spells. Surely one of them will work.” Before I can react, Sunset stands up from her seat with an angry groan. “And what if you fail? Will we try other options then? What if it is too late? Can you really blame me for worrying? I love you more than-” Both of us immediately stop as we notice the sound of footsteps. After a second, Sonata peaks her head into the kitchen, bleary-eyed. The way she looks at us shows she is clearly confused. “What are you two fighting about?” she asks us with a yawn. My mind draws up blanks in response. Telling her the truth would mean coming clean about my recent diagnosis. I- “We just couldn’t agree on some of Adagio’s strategies for the music studio,” Sunset explains, sitting back down at the table. “It’s nothing too important. I’m sorry we worried you.” “Oh, I wasn’t too worried. You two hardly ever fight anyway.” Sonata’s innocent smile reminds me that these fights we have are pretty seldom. It’s usually something big that causes us to disagree like this… Maybe that’s why I feel so rotten every time I fight with her. “I’m gonna get ready for work though, so no more fighting, got it?” The naive yet sweet nature of her request makes it hard to deny her. Sunset and I give her a small nod before she heads upstairs to take a shower. The silence after is deafening… While sunset would usually be typing away at her keyboard, I don’t hear a single button press. Instead, the room feels suffocating from the tension. Half of me wants to be mad at her, but the other half wishes this whole situation could be avoided. If it wasn’t for the fucking tumor… God. Why does my life have to be complicated? “I’m sorry,” Sunset whispers, making me look over at her. A stream of tears falls down her cheeks, but not a single sound escapes her lips. Her posture is completely still, looking into space. I never want to fight with her. Those tears are the only confirmation I need to know that she also feels that way. Taking a deep breath, I walk over to her, wrapping my arms around her from behind the chair. Sunset’s hand grips my arm tightly with no sign of letting go. In all honesty, I don’t blame her for feeling these things. I just wish all of this was more simple. Cheaper too… “Listen. I know you’re worried. It is okay to feel that way,” I whisper, kissing her tear-stained cheek. “I just want to explore all of our options first. That’s all. I’m not trying to be difficult. I promise.” Sunset nods at my words, her head rubbing against my arm. Her grip lacks the strength of before, but I can tell she still doesn’t want to let me go. “I know how stressful this is. I just wish I could help take some of it away.” For some reason, Sunset’s nuzzling stops as soon as those words leave my mouth. Her hand lets go of my arm completely, searching something new up on her computer. “Sunset, I think we should probably stop searching for-” “You’re right about the stress,” Sunset responds with a quiet yet confident tone. “And I think I know just the thing to help us calm down…” Author's Note So, I want to point out that I know these chapters are short. I promise the next chapter will be longer than a thousand words. However, the reason why I made these two short is because I really wanted to get them both out by October 15th! This chapter marks 100 chapters for the Sundagioverse series on the third anniversary of its creation! I hope you all have enjoyed this chapter and remember to stay true to yourself!
Sunscreen and ConvosChapter III: Sunscreen and Convos “It really was kind of you to invite us over, but Applejack simply could not make it,” Rarity tells us as she sips her cup of water. Normally, the fashionista would be requesting a fine tea or a certain kind of coffee. However, she told us she did not want to excite her nerves before going home. This abnormal behavior isn’t lost on my dear wife. She was probably the most confused about Rarity asking for water. Not to mention her attire is a lot less… flashy. “She isn’t feeling herself. I must apologize on her behalf.” The incredibly formal tone leaving her lips does little to mask the disappointment in Rarity’s soul. There is no need for her to say anything else. Sunset and I both know what she means by that. Applejack has not really been the same in the last few months since her grandmother passed. Still… I was hoping to interact with the cowgirl at least once today. It has been too long since we have exchanged words. “I hope she feels better soon,” I offer my condolences, knowing that my words will not change a thing. Rarity smiles at the notion, nodding her head. “We’re still happy you could come over today. Are you sure you don’t have an appetite?” Rarity waves her head at my inquiry. “Thank you for the concern. I am not hungry though. Enough about me. I’d love to hear about you two,” Rarity expresses with a coo to her voice. “How is the married couple after all? Surely there is some drama to share?” The end of her question is heightened to press us for details. Even when she is sullen with her girlfriend’s situation, Rarity is still a gossip queen. “Just because we’re married doesn’t mean that we suddenly have interesting news to share,” Sunset comments, lying as easily as sleeping. Although, sleeping is incredibly difficult for some people like Aria… “I’m surprised you and Applejack aren’t married by now, Rarity. You two were in love far before Adagio and I even became friends. All the way back during high school.” “It’s not from a lack of desire, darling. We just haven’t had the time. Every time we get close to talking about something like that, something serious happens. Like the time Sweetie Belle had a musical showcase that she asked me to design ensembles for.” Rarity moves her hand in a circular motion to convey the consistent events that have stopped the mere idea of marriage. “That and we have some items of interest to settle before we go on such a venture. I’m sure you two lovebirds did something similar.” Sunset looks at me with a curious eye, wondering what I have to say. When it came to our marriage, Sunset and I did not have much we needed to do before getting married. I mean, I apologized to a lot of people and we went on the trip to find Aria and Sonata, but that wasn’t something we needed to plan for. Sunset proposed to me and I agreed. As simple as that. “I’m not sure I follow,” I state in response, grabbing Sunset’s hand. “All we did before we were engaged was live together in an apartment. There wasn’t much we had to settle.” “That’s simply not true, darling,” Rarity insists with a tone that implies my claim is false. “You both bought a house together and the music studio you run. Then we went across the country to find your missing friends. I would say that qualifies as pieces of the puzzle you needed to finish before your vows.” Rarity smiles at me with a smug look, seemingly proud that she dismantled my point. “Every couple has interests that they need to work on before they even think about marriage or any other similar ritual. My dear Applejack and I have to figure out a few things like whose place we will sell and if we should wait until after Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom move to college in a month.” “Yeah, wouldn’t want the brats to get in the way of a honeymoon, huh?” a gruff voice comes from behind Rarity. All of us look towards Aria, standing behind the couch in an oversized tee shirt and pajama pants. Surprisingly, she walks around and sits beside Rarity, taking a bite of a cracker. Where she got the cracker remains a mystery to me. “Hi, Rarity. I didn’t know you were coming over,” Aria states with an actually pleasant tone. “Are those my pajama-” Before Sunset can finish her question, I nudge her to stop. We can handle it later. “Sunset and Adagio invited me. But you must tell me how that piece you asked me to make for you fit. Did I tailor it to the right size?” Rarity asks Aria excitedly, making Sunset tilt her head in confusion. Sunny seems like she is about to ask me what is going on, but I shake my head. I am just as confused as she is… For some reason, Aria’s face turns bright red. Her eyes widen and I can almost see her sweat. “Uh… It was great. Thank you again,” Aria awkwardly responds, trying to shut down this particular topic. “You asked for new clothing from Rarity? What was it exactly?” Sunset asks her, oblivious to the nervous expression on Aria’s face. It’s not exactly a surprise. Aria and Rarity have been spending more time together and Aria has even helped her with some seasonal outfits. Aria has developed more of a fashion sense and the two of them seem to connect on their flashy personalities and somewhat entitled viewpoints. I may have an ego, but both of them are a different kind of confident than I am. Aria has even been showing Rarity some hardcore rock music. In a way, it’s nice to see Aria getting along with her. “Oh, that’s kind of priva-” “She asked me to make her a stunning piece of lingerie,” Rarity says with a prideful look. “All black of course. It was detailed enough that I wish I had made a copy for myself. And it was so romantic because she wanted it to impress Sonata. You should have seen some of the other pieces she asked me to-” Rarity’s mouth is instantly covered by Aria’s hand, a gaze of hellfire coming from her. I honestly did not expect that to come from Rarity’s mouth. Nor did I think Aria would ask for something like that. Rarity can make those items…? I… No, not right now. “I didn’t ask for anything else,” Aria tells Sunset and I while her eyes remain locked on Rarity. “Isn’t that right? Don’t make me burn your hard work.” The fashionista looks at us before giving a small nod, finally prompting Aria to remove her hand from her lips. “Yes, that’s right. Nothing else.” Rarity nods her head slightly, taking a breath. “Regardless, I’m glad you are happy with it. You really must tell me if there is anything else you wish to see brought to life. Your sense of design is very creative.” Aria seems to shrug the compliment off, but I can tell it genuinely touched her. “Thanks. Are we still on to look over some of your dresses this Saturday?” Aria stands up from her seat, taking Rarity’s now empty cup. “Of course. Tell Sonata she is welcome too,” Rarity emphasizes with a smile, but Aria shakes her head. “Sonata has plans with Pinkie Pie that day. And these two wives are planning on doing something for the next week as well,” Aria comments while looking over at Sunset and me. Rarity tilts her head, intrigued by the insinuation. “Really? What are you planning to do, Sunset?” My wife sheepishly smiles at Rarity’s inquiry, even though this was her idea. Now is not the time to lose conviction. “Well, Adagio and I have been pretty stressed for a… couple of weeks. I was thinking that she and I could take some time off. Just a few days.” Sunset shrugs slightly, seemingly backing down. Nudging her, she looks at me before taking a breath. “We were thinking of just going out camping unless those cruise tickets you offered me a few weeks ago are still on the table?” From what Sunset told me, Rarity offered her two spare tickets for a cruise that she was going on with Applejack. Funnily enough, she offered those two days after I told Sunset about my… condition. So, she refused them. It was Sunset’s idea that something like this could help resolve some of the stress between us. I’m not convinced… I still think Sunset and I need to have a discussion about how we feel and how we will go forward instead of avoiding the problem with a small getaway. Even then, it is unlikely Rarity still has those spare tickets considering it is only a couple days away. “I gave those tickets to Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy,” Rarity responds with an understanding tone. “But you could take the ones I was going to use with my darling. Applejack told me she wasn’t going on the cruise and…” Rarity takes a moment to compose herself after a small voice crack. “Let’s just say that I am planning on staying with her in case she needs me.” Rarity reaches into her purse, laying down two pieces of paper onto the coffee table. “Oh, Rarity. You don’t have to. I was just wondering, that’s all. You should really try to convince Applejack to go with you,” Sunset immediately insists, but Rarity shakes her head. “Sunset, I don’t quite feel like going this year. Really, this is a blessing. They won’t go to waste after all. I need to be here for Applejack.” Rarity smiles at us before surprise spreads across her face. Her eyes look over at Aria’s hand on her shoulder, a gesture that bewilders me as well. “I’m sorry. About your whole… situation,” Aria tries her best to offer her condolences. “Tell Applejack that we should all hang out again sometime. Don’t tell her that was my sappy idea. Blame it on uh… Sunset.” Aria averts her gaze, walking towards the kitchen before any of us can show gratitude towards her action. “Thank you for the concern, dear. You really are more kind than you like to admit,” Rarity compliments her, causing Aria’s body to immediately jerk straight. Her now rigid form turns towards us with the most awkward face, trying her best to not cringe. “I-I am not nice. That shit’s sappy. Just… yuck.” Aria brings her hands to her face in annoyance, making an audible slap. “Let’s just hope you don’t have any other family troubles so I won’t have to be nice.” “Yes… Let’s hope indeed. I’m not sure my darling and I could handle more grave news this year. Whether it be illness or… worse,” Rarity mentions with a morbid smile on her face before seemingly trying to shake some sense into herself. Her words cause my chest to tighten, my air flow halting. It’s almost ironic that she mentioned illness. I know she does not mean it in that way. She would obviously want to hear about the situation that we are going through, but… I don’t want her to hear it. As someone who loves the appearance of gold and diamonds, I can adequately say when something seems a little tacky. Whether it is because the owner decided to use the material fruitlessly or due to a mishap in design, I can almost always notice when these symbols of wealth are used incorrectly. The ship in front of me is one such case. While it is big with many different windows, the gold that ordains each one is clearly fake, even from a good distance away. I suppose that is necessary since gold is not the strongest metal out there. It would also incentivize thieves to try and steal window frames of all things to make a quick fortune. Still… The vessel could have used a different appearance to make the ship look nice. Instead, they went with a cheapy, shiny replica of gold, making it more of an eyesore from land. The color is off by five shades, which shouldn’t piss me off, but it does. “Someone looks a little grouchy,” Sunset’s voice breaks me from my thoughts, making me turn my gaze towards her. A smile is bright on her face, unlike the past couple of weeks. Maybe it’s because of the fights we’ve been having, but it’s nice to see her trying to ignore the obvious tension strewn about our lives. Her finger presses my nose as if it is some sort of button, making me simply narrow my eyes. It’s times like these that I wonder if she has some elaborate plan in mind or if she is just being stupid… It’s not like I would stop loving her either way. “You’ll just make fun of me,” I respond, trying to excuse my expression. Sunset vehemently shakes her head. “You ask me what I’m thinking about all the time, but it’s wrong when I ask?” She pulls my arm even though her other arm is absolutely covered by holding her purse, the handles of two suitcases, a coat, and a coffee she insisted on buying. Yet she decides to have one hand free to hold mine. Unpractical, but… cute. “I was thinking about the color of the gold trimming on the ship. It’s… off,” I reluctantly admit, motioning my head towards the aforementioned color. I would have used my other hand, but like Shimmer, I am busy holding stuff. Not the same things though. I am in charge of holding all of our paperwork, the sea passes, our personal identification, and, of course, our phones. This stuff isn’t as heavy as Sunset’s toll, but I constantly have to keep a tight grip on them to make sure I don’t drop a single piece of paper. Ideally, using two hands would be a lot easier, but our little embrace makes her happy. Me too… “That’s not bad to think about. Though, I can’t really see what you mean,” Sunset says while squinting her eyes. “You want to take a picture of it to show everyone?” she asks while nodding to the camera hanging from my neck. Another item that Sunset insisted we bring… I mean, this is technically our first vacation if you don’t count our trip across the country to find Aria and Sonata, but still. Even if I do look stunning, it will be a little tiring to take 200 pictures with this hefty camera. However, I can think of some particularly fun ideas to do with it~ “I can just take a picture of it with my phone after we get checked. Besides, I-” “YO! DAGI! SUNNY!” a raspy voice comes from behind us, making our gaze turn. In a white tank top, jean shorts and flip flops, Rainbow Dash walks up to us with a single suitcase in her hand. Her phone sticks halfway out of her pocket, a laughable downside to the shorts she chose to wear and women’s fashion in general. Standing beside her, Fluttershy wears a green dress and white sandals, two big travel bags following behind her. The sheer size comparison between their luggage is comical. Part of the reason Sunset and I only have two bags is because we planned on sharing bath supplies and some other things. Not to mention Sunset is making me wear a backpack. Needless to say, it does not fit with my attire, but all is fair in travel struggles I suppose. “I didn’t know y’all were coming on this trip! Does Rarity know?” Dash asks us with a laugh. “Rarity isn’t coming actually,” Sunset nervously responds, making me shrug. “She and Applejack had to cancel last minute due to previous obligations,” I lie, trying to make Sunset feel more comfortable. “Rarity decided to give us the tickets.” At least that part is the truth. “She mentioned you two were coming. Funny. I thought cruises like these were more of a romantic and family thing,” I briefly tease Dash, making her open her mouth. “Huh?! Wait, is this a couples cruise? I just wanted to get some sun,” Dash stammers in a confused manner. “She’s teasing you, Dash,” Fluttershy reassures her, giggling to herself. “You look nice today, Adagio. I love the sandals you picked.” Today? Did I look bad on other days…? I mean, I have had nose bleeds and nausea recently. Did she notice my pale skin on one of those bad days? No… She doesn’t know. She can’t. I haven’t told her. It’s just a simple compliment. She doesn’t mean anything else by it. This is Fluttershy. She would be absolutely terrified and worried beyond comparison if I told her, so clearly she isn’t alluding to that. I guess that also confirms that she’s a real friend of mine too since she would be worried for me. “Thanks~ I tried to pick something that would be fashionable, but sturdy enough to walk around in for a while. Though, they don’t make me feel as powerful as boots,” I state with a smirk, making Sunset laugh a little. Even though I act confident, it takes a little bit to get rid of particularly troublesome thoughts. “Dash, are you sure you will get by with just that?” I ask while nodding to her small luggage. “Totally! I don’t need as much stuff to enjoy a good time like you girls,” Dash proudly states while bringing her hand to her chest as if she is some superhero. “I made sure to pack enough toothpaste and shampoo this time,” Dash starts to list off while Fluttershy mouths to us that she did not, in fact, pack enough for the trip. “I also have my phone for pictures, so I didn’t need to ask my mom for her camera.” Fluttershy again silently tells us that she will likely ask us for our camera for any picture she wants to take. “And I counted out every outfit so that I won’t run out of clean clothes.” Despite Dash’s prideful smile, Fluttershy mouths that Dash never packs enough and she makes sure to bring any extras that she or Dash will need. Honestly, this just makes me wonder how many school trips and family vacations they have been on together to make Fluttershy this prepared for her friend’s clumsy behavior. “And we’re all really inspired,” Fluttershy says while trying to nudge Dash towards the building to get on board. “We all should get in line. I kind of want a small nap before we do anything else if you all don’t mind.” “I don’t get how you could be tired. I’m running on pure energy right now,” Dash tells her with a smile. A lot of that energy could either be attributed to her magic or energy drinks she consumed right before getting here. “Fluttershy’s right,” I tell Sunset with a nod of my head. “My hand is getting tired of holding all of our important stuff. You know, the things we NEED to get in.” “Oh, you poor soul,” Sunset teases me before pressing her lips against mine, making a wave of sparks surge through me. That’s unfair, but I love it. “Nevermind the fact that I am carrying-” “Okay, I get it,” I interrupt her, not wanting to hear the whole list. “That’s just another reason for us to follow them.” Holding her hand tightly, I guide her, hoping the line won’t take too long. Focus on calming thoughts. Like the pool. A bed. Sunset’s tan. A bed… Maybe a nap doesn’t sound so bad. Author's Note After almost two and a half months, I have finally updated the Sundagioverse. It may not be a long chapter, but I finally feel some of my writer's block is gone. Just in time for my birthday today~ Yes, I wrote my own birthday present. No, that's totally not weird... Right? Regardless, enjoy the Sundagio snack!
New Surroundings, Old ProblemsAuthor's Note Happy New Year, everyone! I may not be uploading this at exactly midnight for some of you, but it is close enough for most of us! I hope you all enjoy this year more than 2024. Here's some Sundagio to welcome the next year and what it holds! New Surroundings, Old Problems Chapter IV: New Surroundings, Old Problems Setting the camera down on the nightstand, I honestly can’t help but feel a little uneasy. The last time we stayed in rooms like these, I was handcuffed to the bed. I don’t know what I was expecting, but rooms on a cruise remind me a lot of hotel rooms. Except this time, there are more items with a sea aesthetic. Almost as if Sonata had to design a bedroom based on her restaurant chain. Even though I feel slightly off, I try my best to remind myself there will be lots of things to do on this trip. I can’t let myself feel trapped already or I will just drive myself insane. The sound of a zipper brings my head back down to reality. Turning, I see Sunset closing one of our bags, crouching down next to one of the drawers of a dresser. Like most other pieces of furniture, the dresser is also bolted down. The way the light cascades down her back, highlighting her form, almost makes her look… angelic. I don’t believe in angels, but she is the closest person I can describe as one. It still surprises me to call her my wife for two reasons. For one, I can barely believe I’m married in the first place since I never imagined I would let myself get tied down by someone. Two, she’s the best person I could have been with. The only person I would actually marry to begin with… For a pony-turned-human who almost took over a school and then took away my magic, she’s not that bad. Plus, she’s all mine. I bet some people have gotten jealous about that. Maybe it goes both ways considering how many people swooned over me at my nightclub job. Ew… Maybe Sunset is lucky to have me as well. We’re both lucky to have found each other. And that she made me listen to her in the first place. “And that is all of our bags unpacked,” Sunset says in a prideful tone, turning her head to me. Her smile quickly disappears when her eyes meet mine, looking a little confused. “Why are you looking at me like that?” “Oh, just admiring you,” I say quietly, walking over and sitting on the front of the bed. “Is that such a crime?” Despite all the fights we’ve had recently, I… I still feel really grateful to have someone like her. “Like I’m the one worth admiring,” Sunset giggles, sitting down on the ground in front of me. “I’m lucky to have a wife like you. For someone as beautiful and stunning as you, I should be the one admiring you,” Sunset mentions with her eyes lovingly glued to my own. It’s not good for her to say things like that. She just ends up feeding my own ego. In all actuallity, I love being told what she thinks of me. “Really? You haven’t ‘admired’ me much since my birthday,” I tease her while crossing my legs. “We’ve been pretty busy all things considered.” Busy with blood, sweat, and tears... I cross my arms to pretend like I’m closing myself off, Sunset gingerly bringing her hand to my knee. “I know. It’s just been a lot,” Sunset whispers, trying to explain the stress we’ve gone through. “But I really am lucky to have someone so beautiful, confident, and determined by my side,” she says with a smile, holding my hanging foot with her other hand. Slowly, but surely, she unstraps the sandal I have on, pulling it off of my foot. After setting the shoe on the ground, she holds it again, pressing her thumb to my sole while gently kissing my knee. Despite the act, I know she is still worried deep down. But it is nice to have her try to push it aside. To treat me normally. Not fragile. Her wife. Someone to be treasured, not necessarily protected. “You’re so beautiful,” she whispers in a surprisingly smooth tone. Her hands guide my foot to the ground, taking off my other sandal. Sunset said that some time away would help us to connect again, but I wasn’t expecting it to be the moment we got in our room. Is it because she is truly enchanted by the sight of me? Or is it due to her pushing her worry down as much as she can? My body instantly freezes when her lips press against my thigh just above my knee. I can almost feel every cell of my back tense up, the hairs along my neck standing. Sunset’s eyes look up at mine, a humorous stare in them. She enjoys the reactions… “Shut up,” I whisper, her hands quietly moving to my shin. Pretending like she is massaging me, she takes the moment to feel the curves of my leg. “I didn’t say anything,” she responds, a knowing look in those eyes. Her fingers quietly press into my calf. She knows how to press my metaphorical buttons. “Your eyes did.” I look down at her with a frown, pretending to be displeased. She knows though. She knows how I feel. How my body is surprised despite expecting each touch. “Be happy. You’re the only person I react like this for,” I tell her quietly, making her giggle. “So, if it was anyone else touching you like this, you wouldn’t be so tense? Waiting for what they may do next?” she asks hypothetically. She should know my answer already. “If anyone else was sitting in front of me, rubbing my leg, I would probably kick them,” I state blatantly, trying to ignore the way my body is hyper aware of her every touch. “True,” she laughs, bringing her lips closer to my knee again. “One jolt and you would probably break their teeth if they did something like,” bringing her lips down, she kisses my knee, making an audible sound as she pulls her lips just enough to break contact, “this~” Kissing my knee again, she closes her eyes, her hands moving up to my hips. Pulling herself up, Sunset looks directly in my eyes before locking her lips with mine. “I-” A loud ringing causes both of us to stop. Turning to look at Sunset’s purse, a sigh exits both of our lips. Even though we could ignore it, I hardly think that is wise. Hesitantly pulling her hands off of me, Sunset grabs her purse, pulling her phone out. “It’s Fluttershy,” Sunset tells me before answering the phone. I’m not surprised since I figured she might want to meet with us after we got done unpacking. Still… I wish she could have called thirty minutes later. “Hmm? Yeah, we can totally go to lunch with you and Dash,” Sunset replies to Fluttershy, briefly covering the receiver with her hand. “You should start getting ready,” she mentions to me quietly. I simply shake my head, using my hand to tell her to go. “You can go without me. I have something to take care of. I’ll catch up in about fifteen minutes,” I try to reassure her, making Sunset raise her eyebrow. “Alright. If you need any help, just text me,” she tells me quietly, finally removing her hand from the receiver. Sunset grabs her purse while reassuring Fluttershy she is on the way. Sunset gives me a small wave before quickly walking to the room of our door. “Yeah, I heard there are a lot of options. I’m sure-” her voice gets cut off by the heavy door closing, a mechanical lock letting me know I am alone. A small sigh leaves my lips as I look down at my legs. I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy that, but I figured we would probably meet with Dash and Fluttershy after we got settled in. That little moment she initiated was still fun. Standing up, I take a deep breath, feeling the magic in my body stir to life. Resonating a steady hum in my throat, I do my best to replicate a healing tune. The problem is that it has been a while since I have had my magic in the first place. Not to mention I hardly had a reason to practice healing spells since I was immortal. Now… That notion is being challenged. Walking into the bathroom, I maintain my hum on the way to the sink. The past few times I have done this, there was a mess following afterward due to the spells messing with my body in an unforeseen way… As soon as I look at my reflection, I can already see a crimson red painting my upper lip. Grabbing some disposable paper, I gently clean up the nosebleed. I’m not surprised honestly. I remember the spells, but practicing them is not going to be perfect. This is not as simple as mending a cut either… It’s like I have to reverse engineer the spell to actually attack certain parts of me. Cut out the cancer if it can. That’s the problem. The cancer isn’t necessarily made up of sick cells. Just mutated ones. So healing spells aren’t going to do much. I need to change the spells I know to replace the mutated cells. That may be easy when renewing a lost finger, but removing a chunk of my mind and replacing it is a different story. A fresh drop of blood falls onto the white countertop, convincing me it is time to stop. I make a mental note of what tune I just used and the consequences. If it was any other part of my body, I may be tempted to use my magic to destroy it only to make it anew. Obviously, doing that with my brain would be… ill-advised. Bad arm? Just use some of my more extreme spells to fix it. But that can’t be done with my brain… In a way, it almost seems like a cruel joke that the cancer appears in the one place my newly-restored magic can’t invade. My legs start to feel numb, making me grab onto the countertop. It’s just another side effect of the magic… If I told everyone, I could have the help of Aria and Sonata. They don’t have their magic back yet, but their knowledge would still help. As it currently stands, the only person I have to help me is Sunset. She knows more about pony magic, not… Still, if I can get through this without asking for any more help, that would be better. No need to scare them like I have with Sunset… She’s running herself crazy and I can’t help but wonder what will happen after this cruise. Will she be able to stop worrying so much or will she go right back to where we were? I have no way to know… The sound of water accompanies the joyous yells of people playing with each other. Whether they are couples or families alike, the pool is still a hotspot for people of all kinds. Thankfully, there are also some areas where it is quiet like the sun chairs off to the side. As the sun blankets my skin in a warm embrace, I can’t help but look skeptical towards the water. Rainbow Dash has just finished going down the water slide for the sixth time, her hair absolutely soaked. Multiple times, she has done somersaults in the water while Fluttershy has been sitting at the edge of the pool with her legs in the cool oasis. She has applauded Dash each time she went down the slide, even though it’s not a big deal. Even kids complete the slide with no problem. It would be a bigger issue if a slide was supposed to be hard to finish. Sunset, on the other hand, has been trying her best to enjoy the pool to the fullest. Her sunkissed orange skin is easy to spot from anywhere in the pool area. At this moment, it looks like she just got done trying to hold her breath with Dash. Childish, but almost cute on her. Sunset’s hair is soaked as she exits the pool, water dripping off of her. It doesn’t take long for the sun to reduce her to a mildly damp state. Her toned legs are perfectly highlighted by the sun’s rays. I would be lying if I said I didn’t catch a few people staring at her in awe. Some of them were directed at me too, making me wonder who is drawing more eyes. Not that it matters. The only eyes that matter here are hers. “I see you’re enjoying yourself, Alligator,” Sunset teases as she pushes her wet hair behind her shoulders. She gingerly takes the martini from my hand, smelling it before giving me a funny look. “Hmm. I didn’t think you liked vodka,” she states, taking a very small sip of my drink. “I usually don’t,” I respond before taking the drink back. “It’s fine in a martini though. It’s also better if I avoid my favorite since we’re at a pool.” Water falls off of Sunset, her body standing within arm’s reach of my chair. After a few seconds, I can’t quite resist any longer, reaching out and touching her wet leg. “You have been enjoying the water, huh?” I ask while motioning towards her leg, acting like my touch is simply to make a point. Nothing more. It would be weird to admit I like touching her skin. Besides, she had her share of me earlier. “I have. You should join me,” she tells me with a laugh before sitting down on my sunchair beside my knees. A few water droplets from her hair hit my legs, reminding me how cool the pool is. “But if you still want to sit in the sun, you should reapply some sunscreen. Do you need any help with that?” Sunset’s hands hold onto my arm rests, leaning forward to look at me. The way she has her eyes glued on me, I can tell she is trying to ask if she can help me reapply while being the most respectful she can despite the clear lust in her voice. I gently press my finger to her forehead. Of course, she looks very confused by my action. “I can handle it by myself,” I reply with a smirk, leaning forward in my seat to kiss her. “But you could take a break and join me in a hot tub. Or you could leave your wife again to go slide with Rainbow Dash,” I taunt her. Clearly, the choice is not really a big decision to make. If she picked anything other than spending some time in the hot tub with me, I would be surprised. “Aw, why don’t you want to play in the main pool area?” she asks me with a laugh, grabbing the sunscreen despite the fact I said I could handle it. “It could be fun.” “With screaming children? Not likely,” I comment while rolling my eyes. “I prefer the water when it’s more calm. If it was more empty, I might be willing to wade in it with you.” Sunset gently presses the white substance to my thigh, rubbing in the sunscreen with actual intent. The way her hands move tell me she actually wants to protect me from the sun and isn’t doing this just for a feel. But I doubt she isn’t enjoying this. “In other words, you want to be alone with me so you can have me all to yourself,” Sunset teases me while she moves her hands down to my knees. Taking some of the sunscreen, I pour out the contents into my hand, pressing it against my shoulder. “That’s not what I said at all, Sunny,” I tease her back, emphasizing the nickname as a way to make fun of her. “But if you want that, all you have to do is ask.” Sunset gets quiet upon hearing my words. She doesn’t stop the application, but I can tell she isn’t sure what to say. “Still though… Whatever you choose, I hope you’re having fun,” I whisper, finally letting my guard down. As fun as it is to tease her, I also hope this day is going well for her. “I am having fun,” she replies in an adamant tone, her hands moving down to my ankles. “I just want to spend more time with you. It’d mean a lot to me if you’d come spend some time in the water. And I don’t mean a hot tub,” she mentions while nodding her head towards the water slide. The idea itself is a little draining since I can already imagine how tiring it might be. I suppose I should though. She does a lot for me and if she wants to have some fun with me in the water, I should try to enjoy it. “I’ll tell you what,” I whisper, brushing her hair past her ear while bringing my lips close to her cheek. “I’ll do what you want as soon as I finish my drink. Okay? That should give me enough time to let my sunscreen dry~” I gently press my lips to her skin, making her smile genuinely. “Alright. But don’t get a refill, okay? That’s cheating,” she cheekily responds, rubbing her forehead against mine. “Yo, Dagi!” Dash’s voice makes both of us look towards the rainbow athlete coming out of the pool. Of course, she is more wet than a fish. She quickly makes her way to us, smiling like she just finished something impressive. “Do either of you have your phones?” Her strange question makes Sunset look towards me. I give her a small shake of my head before returning my gaze to Rainbow Dash. “We’re at a pool… We left our phones in our room,” I explain as if trying to make a kid understand why bringing a device to an area with a lot of water is a bad idea. “Damn. I was hoping one of you could help me with something. I want to go down the slide again and I wanted a video of it,” Dash mentions with a slightly deflated tone. “Flutters also locked her phone in her room even though all she’s been doing is kicking her feet in the water.” Dash uses her thumb to point back at our friend, rolling her eyes slightly. Taking a deep breath, I finish applying my sunscreen before sipping the last of my drink. “I’ll get my phone. Just give me ten minutes you show off,” I mention as I stand up, making Sunset look a little conflicted. “I promise I will play with you once I’m done helping Dash. It won’t take too long,” I whisper to my wife, gently squeezing her hand. “Cool! Don’t take too long, got it? I want to get some sick footage soon,” Dash remarks while stretching her muscles. I can’t help but roll my eyes with a playful smile while I grab my sea pass. Shaking my head, I walk away from them. I leave my flip flops and towel by my sunchair, hoping it will deter anyone from taking my place. Although, with the number of children running around, I wouldn’t be surprised if one of those brat- No, it’s fine. It will be fine. No reason to get angry yet. I’m lucky that I’m not actually wet yet. If I was, this walk would be a lot colder due to the wind. Once I actually get into the pool, it won’t be the same story. After a few minutes, I make it up some stairs to the next level where our room is. I look over the edge of a balcony area above the pool, finding Sunset easily. She’s gone back to the water, seemingly finished convincing Shy to get in with her. Although, all Fluttershy really does is wade her body beside the wall of the pool. Smiling, I lean my arms against the railing. Even though we left port a few hours ago, Sunset seems to be making the most of her time here. We have a little more than a week though, so there’s no need to enjoy all the activities in one day. “I’ll be back in just a minute,” I say to myself, pretending that she can hear me. I quickly turn around and walk to the door of our room. It unlocks easily with just a tap of the sea pass to the lock. What’s that ringing…? Opening the door, I hear my phone’s ringtone clearly, loudly bouncing off the walls. Who is calling now? I would have expected to lose service this far out. Did I connect my phone to the ship’s internet? That doesn’t matter right now. Moving to my side of the bed, I grab my phone and answer it without looking at the name. “Hello?” I state while trying to hide the fact that I rushed to the phone. How long has it been ringing…? “Adagio, for fuck’s sake,” Aria’s voice comes in clear, despite how far off coast I am. “I have called you six times. Where were you?” she asks in an accusatory tone. “I was at the pool. On a cruise. A place where I likely won’t be answering my phone much,” I respond with a similar annoyed voice, walking over to the window. As much as I want to insult her, I take a deep breath. If she’s called six times, this must be important. “What’s going on?” “Listen, you know your first big client you got recently? Their first recording date is tomorrow,” Aria mentions with a hurried breath, almost like she’s been panicking. “Yes, I know. We talked about it. Miss Scratch and Miss Melody are understanding people, so if you need me to be there, I’m sure you can postpone-” “That’s not it,” Aria interrupts me, a long pause following her words. Watching the water, I listen intently for what her concern is. “I know this is a big contract for you. It’s the first contract you have gotten for the studio. I don’t want to screw anything up since you made a good impression on these clients. What exactly do I do?” From her voice, I can tell Aria is stressed, trying to do her best for my sake. I have already told Aria all of this before, but it will probably help her if I just walk her through it again. Pressing my hand against the glass, I close my eyes. “Okay. Are you at the studio?” I ask her quietly, trying to envision the equipment in front of me. “Yes. I’m in the booth. I just need to know what to do,” Aria explains as if she is in a hurry even though she has until tomorrow to get this right. “Alright. Listen closely. This took me a while to get right when I bought these tools.” Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes. Hopefully she can get this right first try. “First, make sure you turn the microphone on…” A gentle clink comes from the two glasses of wine. Sunset pulls her glass away, the yellow light of the hot tub illuminating her face from below. Surprisingly, no one else is around on the deck. While the pool is closed, I was almost expecting a few other people to be out to enjoy the stars. Then again, it is two in the morning. I’m grateful for the solidarity. It gives me some time with her alone, even if there are probably cameras everywhere. “Well, Miss Dazzle?” Sunset asks, smiling as she sips her wine. “Have you enjoyed the first day? Despite some slight hiccups, I think it’s been pretty nice.” Why would she refer to me so professionally? I prefer hearing her call me Alligator if we’re using titles other than our first names. “Not as much as you have clearly,” I respond with a chuckle, drinking my own wine. It tastes almost bitter, but sweet at the same time, reminding me of a variety of fruits. Typical. Red wine isn’t usually my alcohol of choice, but it is still good depending on the situation. If anything, today has been more stressful than I’d like. The process of getting on this ship was longer than I would have liked. The different symptoms I’ve dealt with have made it harder than I would like. And I had to talk Aria down from her anxiety. I’m sure the next few days will be better, but it has been more stress than relaxation in all actuality. “What’s with that frown?” Sunset moves closer to me, her eyes inspecting my face as if that would tell her what she wants to know. “Are you still thinking about earlier? You told Aria exactly what to do. It should be okay.” Despite her reassurance, I can’t help but wonder if she just jinxed us. “There’s just been more stress today than I thought there would be. Makes it a little difficult to relax when something is constantly on my mind.” Sipping my wine again, I rest my head on her shoulder, looking up at the moon. “Still though. I’m glad you’re having fun. You’ve been way too… tense lately.” The deck of the cruise is quiet save for the sound of the ocean. Sunset’s usual lively demeanor has been replaced by a more silent and thoughtful one. “I know,” she whispers in response, leaning her head against my own. “I’m sorry… For fighting with you so much. I’m just…” Sunset’s words stop, leaving an empty silence in the air. Even though she’s stopped talking, both of us can tell what she means. She’s afraid… As much as we can pretend that nothing is happening, we both know it’s there. The thing we’re both trying to run from at the same time. “I’m scared. I don’t know what to think. I swing from one emotion to the next because I know that I have to do something.” “You don’t have to,” I respond quietly. The overwhelming truth of the matter is the fact that she can’t do much. Not yet anyway. Maybe there’s something she can do when it comes to using magic, but I still have testing to do. In the grand scheme of things, she can’t do anything right now. Maybe not ever. So, is it fair of her to keep trying? “Don’t you realize I do?” she asks me in a voice that sounds close to breaking, keeping herself from crying but still showing the erupting emotion of her heart. “I love you too much.” Lifting her head, Sunset brings her hand to my chin, making me look at her. “After everything that’s happened between us, I can’t bear losing you again. Not like this. If there’s anything I can do, I will find it. You can’t stop me from looking because… You mean everything to me.” A singular tear slides down her cheek, but a loving smile reassures me that everything she said is true. No matter how I try, she will continue to worry. She will not stop doing everything in her power to help me. As much as I hate how fragile she makes me feel, I know I can’t stop her from doing what she can to help. In a way, it’s one of the many reasons why I love her so much. Her kindness. Her brave nature that refuses to give up in adversity. “I love you more than the whole world…” Pressing my lips to hers, my heart flutters to her words. It’s funny to think that the feeling of her kiss can still cause so many jitters. Her words, as simple as they are, show how much I mean to her. While I have no idea why that’s the case, it’s nice to have someone care that much. Someone like her. I still don’t want her to worry so much, but that’s simply because I care about her too. “You’re my everything too,” I whisper, breaking our kiss. Bringing my hand to her cheek, I close my eyes. It’s nice to hear those things. I just wish I could make this situation easier on us. Sunset’s hand wraps around my body, pulling me close to her. She plants smaller kisses upon my cheek, trailing down to my neck. “Let’s stop thinking about… this,” Sunset responds in an equally quiet tone, yet carrying a level of optimism. “We’re here to try and relax. So, as fleeting as this time is, let’s enjoy it~” Pulling away, Sunset drinks the rest of her glass, smiling at me. “What do you say to getting ourselves a little more wine before going back to our room? Then we could… take each other’s swimsuits off to ‘wash the chlorine out of our hair’. Have a little fun.” Sunset shakes her empty glass in her hand, making me giggle a little. Her clear innuendo may be cheesy, but it’s enticing coming from her. “As long as you, Miss Shimmer, promise to cuddle with me afterward,” I request, drinking the last of my wine. Sunset simply gives me a familiar smirk, kissing me once more. “It would be my pleasure~”
FragilityChapter V: Fragility My hair falls against my face and the pillow as I let myself hit the bed. Sunset giggles, brushing my hair away. In just as quick of a motion, she wraps her lips around my own. Both of us can’t help but laugh between our kisses. Even though we need to get to sleep at some point tonight, she still seems full of energy. She also intends to use all of it on me specifically. I don’t hate the attention though. If anything, I have craved attention my whole life. But when it comes from her, it feels special. “I love you so much,” Sunset whispers, a smile still present on her lips. She starts to slow down our kisses, but her body still tells me she is enjoying this closeness with me. I don’t blame her. The scent of her hair reminds me of nights past. Nights of desire and times where I felt safe. In a way, it also brings back memories of the nights I did not have her in my arms. Nights I never want to repeat. Unfortunately, the momentum begins to slow down between our lips. Her hand gently holds my shoulder before she finally breaks out contact, her eyes opening to stare at my own. Her look is full of love, warming my body. “What?” I ask quietly. “Why are you looking at me like that?” “I’m just… thinking,” she murmurs softly. “I don’t deserve your support. You’ve always been there for me, regardless how busy I am.” I can’t help but raise my eyebrow at her statement. Is she misremembering? She has been here for me more often. Right? “You’re mistaken,” I gently remind her, pushing myself up to be at her eye level. “You’ve supported me through equally as much if not more. It’s hard for me to remember how I’ve paid back that kindness.” “It’s unlike you to be so modest,” she teases me, her hand brushing my damp hair away from my eye. “What? Do you want to be reminded of your good deeds?” she asks me in the same joking tone. Sitting down on the bed in front of me, Sunset never breaks eye contact with me, but she is clearly thinking of the right thing to say. “Well, firstly, you’ve always supported my educational pursuits. I’m about to get my master’s degree and finally get a job as a therapist. It has taken up a lot of our time and caused it to be hard to be intimate at times, but you never complained. Instead, you did everything you could to help me. You even got me a motorcycle so I wouldn’t have to stand around waiting for the bus all day.” “Okay, fine. But that’s not exactly equal to everything you’ve done for me,” I reply with a roll of my hand, trying to emphasize the disparity. “You helped me learn true happiness after all. And you gave me the best gifts I have ever received,” I tease her while connecting our lips again. Sunset giggles slightly to herself. “Yeah, but you were the one who went out of your way to buy a dance pad for a game we could play together just because you remembered I liked it.” Her finger pokes my shoulder, making both of us laugh. “Did you also forget you gave me some pretty great gifts too?” she asks before leaning towards her purse, pulling out a gold bracelet with a red gemstone of a sun with a purple musical note. That was an anniversary gift I commissioned a few years ago. To be honest, I’m surprised she risked bringing it on a trip like this where it could get lost. “Not to mention you bought me the latest Playstation because my last console broke.” That was before we even moved into our house. Back when we were in an apartment together. I’m surprised she would bring that up since it is relatively small considering everything else we’ve been through together. “Playing games is one of your hobbies. What was I supposed to do? Watch the love of my life drown in her own stress?” I ask while rolling my eyes, making Sunset push me slightly. “But that’s the thing. You didn’t have to. It wasn’t my birthday or the holidays. You did it simply out of care for me.” The way she talks is evident that this is sure to turn into another war of ours where we try to convince each other why one of us loves the other more. Still… It isn’t necessarily a bad feeling. It’s nice to hear how much she loves me. And she is right deep down. Both of us would give the world for each other. “You’re the same person who was willing to risk everything to help me buy the music studio. All because I have faith that it can be a success,” I whisper in response. The soft orange light from the lamp beside me illuminates her eyes while also being dark enough to make us feel alone. The way she looks in my eyes is pitiful as if I am poorly mistaken, her fingers trailing down my cheek. “That’s because I know that you will be a success.” Her words are soft. Tender. Touching my soul effortlessly. From the slight blush on her face, it’s apparent that even she wasn’t prepared to speak that honestly. Her words came straight from the heart without a hint of deception anywhere to be found. “You’re destined for great things, Adagio. I see it every day in the way you smile. The way you flaunt your style. As much as you tease, you have a big heart.” A singular tear slides down her cheek despite the happy expression on her face. However, her smile seems slightly off as she pulls me closer, her eyes still connected with mine. “You can do great things. I just… don’t want the opportunity to be taken from you.” “What are you trying to say?” I ask her, feeling her hand tremble slightly. I probably already know the answer though… “You know what I mean,” Sunset tells me quietly, her tone brutally honest. Her hand trails down to my chest as if feeling for my heartbeat. “I don’t know what I would do. Without you… You’ve become the biggest part of my life. I… I don’t want this to be our last adventure together.” Her eyes look back up at mine, every semblance of glee erased. Now, there’s just a curious and scared stare. “This won’t be our last adventure,” I try to reassure her, shaking my head. “I told you. Stop worrying about me. I will be fine. It’s only been two days on this cruise. I’m not going anywhere.” “It’s not that simple. I can’t just stop worrying completely like it’s some mental switch.” “It’d be easier if you could just trust me when I say I will be okay,” I respond in a slightly annoyed tone. Sunset withdraws her hand, seemingly confused. “You’re the one who is making this difficult. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable in worrying that-” “That what? That I’ll just roll over and die like that? I’ve been alive for thousands of years. Out of everything, this sure as hell won’t be the end of me.” I turn away from her with a sigh, feeling myself get angrier. I just don’t want her to treat me like I’m some fragile toy. I can handle more than this. “Obviously not,” Sunset answers in a huff, standing up from the bed. “I’m just scared, okay? I’m scared since I don’t know what will happen. Something else might come to haunt us and that is the last thing I need.” “Yeah, but I am still okay now. Right here. Right now. All I want is for us to just try and forget about it until we can get home. The last thing I desire is to be treated like some sick dog. I’ll be okay, god damn it,” I let out in an angry breath, turning my gaze back towards her. I immediately stop gritting my teeth when I see her offended expression. “I’m… I’m sorry. I just… I don’t want to be defined by this. I know you can’t stop worrying, but it makes all our memories feel like I am actively being defined by this diagnosis.” Sighing to myself, I shake my head, looking towards the floor. At this point, Sunset has also turned her gaze from me. “I’m sorry I make you feel like that,” she barely responds in a neutral tone, seemingly still processing my words. To be fair, I still need to think about what we just said… Standing up from the bed, I grab my shoes, causing her to look back at me. “What are you doing?” “I need some fresh air. Gather my thoughts.” Taking a deep breath, I look back at her, seeing an understanding nod. “Fine. Can we talk when you get back?” she asks in the same neutral tone, but I can tell she is conflicted. I am too. I’m not quite sure how to feel. “Of course.” The moon’s pale light gives a soft white color to the sand. The waves are calm, but it almost seems like a certain energy is being held back. As if a storm is coming. Even if it does, I should be back in my room by that time… Walking through the water, it occasionally reaches just below my knees. Funnily enough, the air is colder than the waves. Maybe that’s simply because of my rumination. After all, it is difficult to not ponder what Sunset is thinking right now. She’s likely angry. Upset. Sad. But I know she will try to make it right due to her promise to enjoy this trip to the fullest. As if she is the one that needs to apologize… I was too hard on her anyway… “Hey, Dagi,” Dash’s voice comes from behind me, splashing water alerting me to her presence. “When are you coming back? I know the beach is nice and all, but it is getting pretty late. Unless you want to sleep out here,” she laughs, joking as she usually does. However, I don’t turn to face her. I can’t help but shrug, wishing she wouldn’t have come out here. I need some time for my thoughts after all. “Maybe in twenty minutes,” I reply quietly, wading through the water on the coast. From the sound, I can tell Dash is following me. “You look down,” she comments with a neutral tone. Even though she’s following after me, I don’t feel like telling her the specific reason why I’m out here. “Is it because of your fight with Sunset?” I guess she found out from my wife… “Come on. I’m sure that she didn’t mean what she said. She was in the wrong anyway. Let’s go back.” “I wouldn’t exactly say that,” I reply, sighing to myself. “She was just… scared. You don’t need to know why, but that wouldn’t mean she’s in the wrong.” “Sure it does,” Dash replies with an attitude that says she knows better. “Being scared is one thing, but being overprotective is another entirely! I know what it is like with my parents. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if my partner did the same thing.” I can hear Dash’s fist hit her other hand from the iconic slap, displaying her own frustration. “I would be pissed too. She’s not letting you live. And it’s not like she has something to protect you from.” She would be surprised… “She’s just looking out for me,” I reply with a shake of my head. Even if I am angry at Sunset, I shouldn’t air those grievances out with Dash. Sunset is my wife. We respect each other enough to handle our matters privately. “Yeah, but she can’t exactly protect you from cancer. It is something inside after all…” She knows…? Wait… Why would Sunset… I said I didn’t want to tell them. “Something even you can’t control. It’s sad because I thought siren magic was pretty powerful.” It is… It should be. I just… I can’t seem to find the right spell. I never had my health compromised like this before. Nothing has come close to killing me. As it stands, I can use a vast array of spells to destroy, transform, teleport, but… I don’t remember the healing spells. Or at least one that can help me here… “It’s pathetic. You should have told us,” Dash scolds me as if I’m some pet. “What do you know, Dash? All you can do is go fast. You don’t have to search millennia of memories to find a spell you never used,” I snarl at her, refusing to look at her. As if she has knowledge of magic that rivals my own. She only uses it to make herself look better. “She’s got a point though,” Twilight states, making my shoulders tense up. “You should have told us. I could have helped. Sunset knows a lot about magic, but I still could offer my own expertise.” “That’s easy for you to say, Twi,” I mention while rolling my eyes. “This is the exact reason I fought with Sunset. I didn’t want to be treated like I’m some sick dog. I’m the most powerful siren alive. I can handle this.” “And what if you’re wrong?” Applejack asks in a harsh tone. “Ya already see how bad I am with handling my grief. Imagine how much worse it would be if Granny refused to accept any help at the end, working herself to death. Your ego is gonna make it worse.” “Shut up, Applejack. No one asked for your opinion.” I will be fine. I will. My chest feels so tight. “Why can’t you admit it, Adagio? For the first time, you’re afraid of dying,” Aria insults me with an annoyed tone. “We’ve been alive for thousands of years. It’s okay to say that you’ve never thought about it before. I would be scared too.” “You don’t have to be an example. You can stop being so strong,” Sonata practically pleads with me. “We’re your friends. We can help.” “Shut up. For once. Just stop. I don’t need help. I can do this. If anyone can do this, it’s me. I have avoided that so many times. This won’t stop me.” I wrap my arms around myself, shivering at just how cold it is. It feels like winter, yet the water is still a mild cool. It’s almost ironic. Nothing in Equestria killed you, but the biggest threat is your own body now. A small laugh echoes, making me grind my teeth. My own voice taunts me. Maybe you were looking for a challenge. You have your magic back and all your friends. Life is good. But maybe you were bored… Maybe you wished for something challenging. “Shut the fuck up,” I practically yell at all them, the sound of wading water almost deafening by now. “I don’t need this from you. I obviously didn’t wish for this.” Ah, but didn’t you like it when Sunset and the Rainbooms provided some level of difficulty? Don’t say no… You found it too easy to control people. I can feel her breath on my neck, directly chuckling at me. Now, you don’t have Sunset to fight. Something to dominate. For all you know, you made this happen. “I told you to-” reaching into my purse, I pull out my revolver, aiming it behind me. All of the sound caused by the water instantly stops. Where… Where is her taunting face? Where is everyone else? Wait… Why were they here? Everyone else is back in Canterlot City aside from Dash. And that side of me… she’s gone. But she was just here. Wasn’t she? The shiny metal in my hand causes my heart to skip a beat. This gun… Why is it here? Why do I have it? Why would I even try to use it again? I threw it away… I… My legs start to shake under me. Everything feels dizzy. My mind is… foggy. Everything starts to close in. I can feel my legs slip, but everything slows down while I fall. Nothing feels right. This isn’t right… Author's Note Hello, all. So, around two weeks ago, I made a blog post describing how my dog was going to die. On January 7th, my dog passed away. Ever since then, I have been crying on and off and it has emotionally wrecked my heart. However, I am doing my best to move forward like I know he would have wanted me to. He was the best dog I could have ever asked for. Always loyal and happy, making sure I was okay until the very end. I had the idea for this chapter laid out before my dog passed, but only got around to writing it in the past couple of days. It was originally meant to be longer, but I hope you enjoy this update regardless.
Blanket of PressureChapter VI: Blanket of Pressure The sound of button pressing makes me open my eyes. On the TV, a hero clad in black fights a villain in green with robots everywhere. The light coming from the screen is the only source of illumination aside from the lamp right beside me. Sunset sits on the other side of the couch, furiously playing with the controller in her hands. Aside from the sound of the game, our living room is quiet. A book rests in my hands. The lamp makes the normally white pages seem yellow. A blanket is wrapped around my legs, making me feel pretty comfortable. It’s nice to rest on my side of the couch like this. Even if nothing is said between us, it still feels incredibly intimate to be able to engage with our hobbies next to each other. Sunset sticks her tongue out in concentration, trying her best to not die to the boss she is fighting. Looking down at the book, I can’t help but raise my eyebrow slightly. “War: What You Need to Know,” I read the title aloud. When did I pick out this book? I don’t remember being interested in reading this. However, it is just as likely that Sunset picked this out. There’s not much harm in giving it a chance though, right? Flipping open the book to the first page beyond the contents, I start to read the words inscribed. Huh. It starts with a description, but it isn’t about war. It’s about- “Ah, damn it… I was so close that time,” Sunset mentions while rolling her eyes, prompting me to look away from the words. “Maybe you should take a break from the game? You’ve been trying that for hours.” Has she? Time has really flown by then. It doesn’t feel like I have watched her for hours. “No way. I solved 243 puzzles to get to this one boss.” Once again, Sunset activates the boss fight, making the green man in a big mech suit come out to play. “You have a checkpoint. You can afford to take a break and catch your breath,” I remind her gently, bringing my eyes back to the book. The words starting chapter one are discussing the shared pain that people endure when it comes to… cancer? “Yes, but do you have that luxury?” My eyes dart up from the book, noticing the TV is off. Sunset looks towards me, but her eyes are emotionless. Empty except for what seems like some sort of resentment. The light from the lamp flickers out as if it is a candle snuffed by the wind. The dark leaves her skin looking like a light gray. “What… What did you say?” “Dagi!” a yell hurts my ear, making me shake my head. Aria stands in front of me, looking angry as usual. Sonata stands with a guitar in her hand, the music studio lights making everything seem brighter. “Where are you? We’re supposed to be working on this new song.” “Yeah, sorry. Just… I feel dizzy,” I reply slowly, looking at the microphone in my hand. The room seems bigger than I remember… “What song are we working on again?” “Holes in Reality? Are you alright, Adagio? We can take a break if you need,” Sonata states in a tone of concern. Reality… That’s ironic. This feels off. Every time I open my eyes, Sonata and Aria move away from me. Wasn’t Aria just wearing a magenta jacket instead of a tee shirt with holes in it? “No. This isn’t right…” Stepping back, I take a deep breath. I don’t think we had a song titled like that. Pushing past Aria, I open the door of the recording booth. A roar of words hits me, the lobby of a hospital makes my head spin. Why am I here? The lobby has an open floor plan where I can see up to… twenty floors…? There’s no door behind me. Just a hard floor leading to waiting areas for the different sections of the hospital. Hundreds of people. My breathing does little to make me feel better. I am constantly lightheaded. God. It almost hurts to open my eyes. The voices of everyone flies around me, despite their static positions. What is going on? Looking up, I see a person with fiery hair walk past me. No, not just a person. Her. “Sunset?” I reach my hand out, taking a step. As soon as my foot touches the floor, my chest tightens, squeezing out the air in my lungs. I instantly gag on something, drool lingering on my lips. Touching it, I see a crimson red staining my fingers. Instead of saliva, blood makes me gag on my own tongue. I… I’m losing strength. Am I… Am I dying? Is this pain… Could this… No. It can’t be. Right? The pain in my chest is so severe… It is taking every ounce of willpower to stop myself from falling over. “Sunset, wait,” I try to call out, but my chest constricts around my heart. I can’t let myself stop. If I do, it feels like I may not have the strength to move again. Despite the pain, cramps, and dizziness, I run forward, pushing through the crowd. I don’t know why, but everything in me is urging me to get to her. Even though my breaths feel like I am inhaling straight carbon dioxide, I keep my pace up. I can’t afford to let myself slow down. The pain… It feels so real. Crushing my organs… I need to get to her. To touch her. To tell her- “Miss, you’re bleeding,” someone gets in my way. I don’t need this. Shoving them out of the way, my arm holds my chest in a desperate attempt to keep myself intact. Multiple hands grab onto me, trying to pull me back. “You need to stop so we can help-” “Let go of me!” Pushing past, it feels like I am trying to avoid being touched every inch I move forward. They won’t help me. This isn’t right. None of this is right. Stopping now is likely going to make it impossible to move again. Despite how painful it is to keep going, I know I can’t slow down. I can barely see her hair through the crowd. Taking a deep breath, I sprint forward, dodging around everyone that tries to grab me. She turns the corner to another hallway. Getting to the corner, I look down the corridor. Water instantly rushes and submerges my legs. Rock walls surround me, making a maze of water. People float along the water that reaches my thighs as if it is some lazy river. Towards the end of this path, there are branching openings. Sunset stands there, seemingly trying to decide where to go. Fuck this… “Sunset,” I try to call out to her, but I cough up more blood. Trudging through the water, I have to push through the people. It’s like everything is specifically made to slow me down. Laughs echo, darkly contrasting my difficulty to breath. Their hands try to grab me again. The water splashes violently against my thighs just as one of them takes hold of my knee. “Rodon,” I strike out with my singular word, my magic instantly lighting them on fire. Turning the corner, I push past the people in the water. Sunset is not far ahead of me, turning to the left this time. I try to grab her shoulder by lunging forward, but she is just out of reach. Looking to the left, I see a steep decline of rapid water that must be two stories tall. Sunset is already at the bottom, unharmed. Pain spreads through my chest from each heart beat, making me wince. Whatever is happening, it feels like it is coming to an end soon… I need to get to her. Taking a deep breath, I let the water sweep me down. In an instant, my body is flung to the side. Fuck! The rock wall shreds into my shoulder. God damn it. Every time I slam into one of the walls, I can feel the searing pain of cut skin. Water overwhelms me, easily making me gag on the way down. My feet hit the hard rock. Water splashes. My arms hit the rock floor, submerging my whole body. A metallic taste fills my mouth as a thousand hands grab me. I can’t stop. I won’t be able to move again if I do. As soon as I break the surface of the water, I take a breath, pushing myself to my feet despite the sheer agony afflicting my body. Blood drips from my lips onto my hand. A dark corridor is laid out in front of me, continuing to a pitch black void. It doesn’t take me even a second to move forward as fast as I can. The dark does not scare me. Whatever is happening to my body does… Coming to a wall of what seems to be confetti strings hanging from the ceiling, I can see brief glimpses of light on the other side. My chest tightens further, strangling my heart… Reaching forward, I push through the obstruction as a wave of light comes over me. Once again, the sight of the hospital lobby greets me. Water and blood drip off of me, none of which seem to be a concern to her. Only a few meters in front of me, Sunset stands in front of the entrance, talking with Rarity. “Sunse-” Thump. Bringing my hand to my chest, it feels like everything is being crushed inside me. I can’t feel a familiar warmth in my veins. Or hear a slight pulsing. I… I can’t feel my heart. There’s no beat. “Sunset-” I try to say, but the last of my energy leaves my body. Every last ounce of adrenaline was used and… I’m too late. I wasn’t fast enough. My body is… Hitting the floor doesn’t even cause much pain to splinter through my body. I can’t feel much anymore. If this is what death feels like, I can’t… I need to… I’m not done. There’s more I need to do. I can’t breathe… All I can do is look at her. As my vision fails me, I see her look towards me, a confused frown being the last clear sight. “What’s gotten into her?” Enough. This twisted vision ends here. Now. I have not come this far to let myself get scared by meaningless ideas. You have no control here… I will not die. Especially like this. None of this is real. This is all in my head. Opening my eyes, I notice that I’m wearing a red dress. All around me is an abundance of black smoke, thick enough to be tangible. A small chuckle leaves my lips, gradually turning into a cackle. Strands of the smoke are tied to each of my fingers. It is absurd to think that this would be enough to hold me down. Humming a tune filled with rage, the smoke is lit aflame, making it disappear from my hands. “In my head,” I whisper to myself, walking forward. Every step makes the smoke retreat ever so slightly. “I’ll be honest, I did not expect it to be this bad so far.” Bringing my hand to the crown on my head, I can’t help but let out another frankly demented chuckle. Nothing about this is funny in a way. It’s just so moronic this is even happening. To think a part of me just tried to kill me. “Nice try. Really. I mean it,” I say in a laugh, knowing that this thing isn’t alive. Or sentient as it may be. “I almost believed that was real. Something tells me the pain was real, all things considered.” Twirling my finger around some of the smoke, I smile to myself. This… disease has infected enough of me. It’s ironic that the only thing that has come close to killing me is myself. Not even the powerful beasts of Equestria stood a chance. I knew I was powerful, but damn. It’s almost hilarious that I am the one who has come close to ending my life. Maybe those years without my magic made me truly forget my power. “You will regret pissing me off,” I whisper, burning more of the smoke. “Trust me, I don’t like to use this kind of language. But I am exhausted from this little game. I fully intend to live for a long time with a very special person.” Flames extend from my fingers. I know I can’t get rid of it, but I can make it slow down. “It’s only a matter of time until I conquer you too.” Swiping my seapass on the door, it immediately unlocks in front of me. I wait a moment to open it, thinking about the right thing to say. It’s only a few hours away from dawn. If she isn’t asleep, I would feel guilty about keeping her up. However, it wasn’t exactly my choice to pass out on a chair close to the front of the ship. It was absurd how I believed the first part of that delusion was real since we haven’t stayed overnight at a beach. It’s only been a couple of days so far and we have visited one other place for a few hours. Pushing the door, my shadow spills out into the room. The light behind me tries to illuminate the dark interior. I quickly make my way inside, closing the door behind me. It’s almost pitch black in here except, making it unlikely that she is still awake. Walking past the bathroom, I see a faint red glow from the alarm clock next to the bed. The lump on the other side of the bed is quiet. Still except for the occasional breath. Sighing to myself, I change for bed silently. I wish I hadn’t made her wait so long. She also didn’t deserve the anger I gave her… I’m sure I can talk with her in the morning though. Slowly lifting the blanket, I slip into the bed. The feeling of an automatic warmth spreading from her side of the bed greets my skin. Sunset is sleeping on her side, facing me. Her breathing is slow and steady. Peaceful… Leaning forward, I gently kiss her forehead, making sure not to wake her. “I am sorry, my sweet summer mist,” I whisper, brushing her hair slowly with my fingers. Of course, she doesn’t answer. Not that I want her to anyway. I want her to get her rest. After a moment, I rest my head down onto my pillow. Closing my eyes, I try my best to slow down my mind. However, a touch immediately breaks me from my attempt to sleep. Arms wrap around me, pulling us closer together. A pair of lips kiss my cheek tenderly. It’s an embrace she repeats a couple of times, making my cheek feel warm. “I’m sorry, Alligator,” she whispers in a tone as sweet as honey. Her arms hold onto me, speaking a thousand words in the stillness. The way she cuddles me is enough to let me know that she has no intention of letting go. “Listen-” “I was wrong,” we both say at the same time, making Sunset’s breath stop for a moment. Turning my head to look towards her, I can barely see one of her eyes. The only thing that lets me know I am looking at the right place is a slight reflection of the red light from that alarm clock. “I’m sorry, Sunset,” I whisper, bringing my hand to her cheek. “I… I’m glad you worry about me. You have shown me more love than anyone else. Even myself back when I was in Equestria. I’m scared too, but…” Pressing my nose against hers, I close my eyes, trying to not let myself tear up. “I won’t let anything take this away from me. You have every right to be scared.” “Adagio, I… You’re right. I am scared.” A gentle kiss is laid bare upon my lips. “But you also had every right to be angry. I shouldn’t treat you like you’re a sick dog every day. I-” Before she can say another word, I press my lips into hers with a tear streaming down my cheek. My arms wrap around her as if she’s about to leave for a long trip, trying to make the most of this one embrace. Trying to imbue each second of this kiss with every ounce of love I have for her. She shouldn’t blame herself. I understand… But no matter what, I will not leave her. Not like this. “You can be scared. You can tell me about it every time you feel afraid,” the words instantly spill out of my mouth as soon as I break the kiss. “I don’t want you to hide it from me. That’s just what I would be making you do if I told you to stop treating me like I’m sick. If there’s anyone you should be able to trust, it should be me.” Kissing her again, I can’t help but let out a small sob. “Sunset, I promise that I will be here for you if you get scared. But I also promise I won’t let this stop us. I just need your help after this cruise.” A tear streams from Sunset’s eye, but a hopeful smile responds to my plea. Her hands practically claw into my back, but I don’t mind. It’s just a sign of how she won’t let go, even if the sun destroyed the Earth. “Alligator, you always have my help,” she whispers, pressing her forehead to mine. “I love you too much to ever leave you on your own." Author's Note Inspired in part by a very real dream I had where I truly felt like I was dying. Funny thing is this chapter was supposed to be longer with more happy fluff, but that dream I had, which was probably inspired by my dog's death, gave me an idea. However, we will get into more fluff later. I hope you enjoyed some good old angst.
