Massive costs for shipping fees mean
Only the richest can fill my stores.
Neigh, this is bad business, for
Everypony must shop at Rich’s Barnyard Bargains,
Yet profits must still be made.

Must we delay the new hoes and fertilizer?
Oh, no, the growing season is coming, and
Nearly everypony buys those here. A cost
Expanded is a customer lost, and a competitor’s
Yearning for our destruction.

Maybe the workers must take a dock
On their pay, for three weeks about.
No, they need to
Eat too, and many are too talented of
Yeomares to lose.

My mind wanders to the worst-case scenario:
Ostentatious signs declaring a closing,
Nugatory profit of a few bits, from ponies with
Empathetic eyes on me, knowing
Yours truly will be on the street soon.

Marvelous Diamond Tiara and splendid Spoiled
Outed from the Rich Mansion and into the poorhouse?
Never, I will not allow it! There must be-
Eureka! The answer so obvious,
Yanked from my brain!

Mares and stallions guard a pocketbook like
One of their own children. But
Nopony can resist a sale.
Even the most miserly ponies
Yield to the promise of cheapness.

Mulch shall be the first item,
Offered half-off with purchase of
New hoes. And the tree-trimmers and
Extra-sharp saws bundled together for those
Youthful wood-workers in the hills.

Mayhap the chicken feed drops five bits,
Or perhaps ten. The yield was good this season.
Not worth letting it go bad. Yes, yes, this
Exceeds the costs! And with the added profit, the Riches will
Yodel with joy at the new pool next spring!

Multitudes of problems build up, but
Observant minds can keep
Nervousness from begetting destruction.
Entrepreneurs know you must always keep
Your head, and profit will soon follow.

Author's Note

This was the poem I had the most fun writing. I love Filthy Rich as a character, and I loved the idea of him treating a relatively minor business problem as the start of a total corporate collapse. I also used the Acrostic style to show how single-minded Filthy was on profit.

This was originally the third poem, but I switched spots with "Haikus for Rainbow", as I felt this one was more comical and needed to be here to ease the sadness "My Mother Used to Be Here" provoked.