Sunlight

Chapter 4 - The Balcony

The next afternoon, Sunburst stepped quickly down the stairs as he made his way to the dungeon, breathing heavily from exertion, but feeling very excited. An ironic state to be in, perhaps, when on your way to a dungeon, but he couldn’t help it. Shining Armor’s heavier, slower hoof-falls clacked loudly on the steps behind him.

“Hold up, Sunburst.” Shining Armor called after him. “Please, please don’t trip down the stairs again. I don’t need another heart attack.”

Sunburst slowed down, chastised, and took the rest of the steps more carefully.

That had only happened one time, he protested to himself.

Maybe twice…

He waited for Shining Armor at the bottom of the stairs, and they walked the rest of the way together.

Before long they had been cleared to enter the dungeon, and were standing in front of Sombra’s cell. The gray stallion had stood up when he heard the door being unlocked, and he smiled when he saw Sunburst.

“Good afternoon, Sunburst.” he said, looking down at the little yellow unicorn. Looking up at Shining Armor, he seemed unsure what to do for a moment, then he nodded slightly. “Captain.”

“Sombra.” Shining Armor replied.

“I - we, that is - have some good news.” said Sunburst cheerfully.

“Oh?” Sombra

“Shining Armor and Princess Cadence said it would be alright for you to leave your cell for a bit!”

“With some conditions.” Shining Armor added with a raised hoof. “You’ll have to wear an antimagic cuff on your horn, and a pair of guards will escort you. You must also stay with Sunburst the entire time.”

“Is that all?” Sombra asked, seeming surprised and even relieved. “I thought I’d have to go forth in irons, clanking and dragging the whole way.”

“That could also be arranged, if you prefer.” Shining Armor said jokingly.

“No, that’s quite alright.” Sombra said with a laugh. “Certainly, I accept your terms!”

“Great!” Sunburst said, grinning. “Ooo, I’m so excited! Here, let me-”

“Hold on, Sunny.” Shining Armor said, gently preventing him from moving to the cell door. “Cuff first.”

“Oh. Right.” Sunburst said sheepishly. “Sorry.”

At Shining Armor’s direction, Sombra stuck his curved red horn through the bars, allowing him to slip the antimagic cuff around it. With a quick pulse of violet magic he activated it, locking it in place as well.

“Guards.” Shining Armor called.

The dungeon doors opened, and the sentries came inside. At Shining Armor’s direction, one of them unlocked the cell with the loud sliding clank of heavy metal bolts retracting. Sombra waited compliantly as the guard opened the cell door. He stepped out, and waited patiently as the guards gave him a quick once-over. Satisfied, they stepped back to a respectful distance.

“Well.” said Shining Armor, smiling. “Have fun you two.”

With a quick half-wave half-salute to Sunburst, he departed.

“Are you ready, sir?” the first guard asked Sunburst.

“Yes, I think so.” Sunburst answered. “Sombra?”

“Lead the way,” Sombra said, moving to stand next to him.

It was the first time they’d been next to each other without a set of bars in the way, and Sunburst couldn’t help finding it a bit uncanny. Pushing past that feeling, he tipped his head towards the doors with a smile, and then led Sombra out of the dungeons. Through the hall and up the stairs, into the main body of the castle they went, a guard each before and after them.

“Where are we going, Sunburst?” asked Sombra. “In your excitement, I believe you forgot to say.”

“To the very top!” said Sunburst, pointing upwards with a hoof.

Sombra’s eyes widened slightly with surprise, but he made no protest.

Higher and higher they went. Sunburst had never actually gone so far up in the castle before now, and he hadn’t realized just how tall the structure was. He wondered how it measured up against the modern skyscrapers of Manehattan or Las Pegasus. As they climbed, the wide stairways of the first few floors quickly gave way to narrow, tightly spiraling staircases. At the base of the last set of stairs, the guards allowed them to go the rest of the way alone. Sunburst had asked to have some degree of privacy with Sombra, and Shining Armor and Cadence had agreed it was unlikely that Sombra would be able to escape from the top of the tallest building in the Crystal Empire without magic. Less than a minute later, they emerged into the open space at the top of the spire. Sunburst led Sombra out onto the high balcony, and together they looked out over the Crystal Empire.

It was late afternoon. Far overhead the sun was slowly westering, casting the lengthening shadows eastward. The six main roads that stretched out from the wide plaza beneath the castle shone faintly in deep shades of purple and violet. The busy city markets were full of ponies, buying and selling and bartering goods. Houses and shops lined the streets, mingled with the lush greenery of parks and carefully tended groves of trees. Out past the edges of the city, the green patchwork of the farmlands gave way to rolling green hills. Beyond those, where the power of the Crystal Heart faded, green gave way to stark white as the vast, untouched snowfields of the Frozen North stretched away into the far distance, sparkling in the afternoon sun. To the north, tall gray and white mountains thrust their craggy heads up into the cloudless blue sky.

Sunburst, awed by the immensity of it all, looked over at Sombra. He too seemed overwhelmed, but not in the way Sunburst had hoped. He was squinting, shading his eyes from the bright sun with a foreleg. It only then occurred to Sunburst that Sombra wouldn’t be used to this kind of bright light after so long spent inside and underground.

Sombra also looked tired. He leaned on the railing, looking down and out over the Crystal Empire. His strong frame was unexpectedly tense in the sunlight. Sombra’s red eyes flicked to Sunburst, then he turned his head to look at him more directly.

“Thank you for this.” he said, smiling.

Despite the tightness of his shoulders, the smile was as sincere as any Sunburst had seen on the dark king’s face. Sunburst looked into his eyes, which were definitely different than they had been the first time he had seen him. They were normal. Round pupils. No dark, menacing aura or evil intent. They reminded Sunburst less of fresh blood now, and more of rubies and other polished red gemstones.

His smile reached them now.

Sombra had such nice eyes…

“N-No problem!” Sunburst said, ears flicking back as he rubbed at the back of his neck, cheeks burning. Was he blushing? “I’m glad we could - that is, that I could… Yep.

They sat there for a long time, enjoying the quietness that came from being so far above the world. Time passed, and a gentle breeze brushed past them, touseling their manes and, occasionally, carrying up the faintest murmurs of the city life below. The sun drew ever westward, and now shops were being closed or packed away. Street lights blinked on across the city as ponies started to head home for the evening, or perhaps to join friends and loved ones for an evening of fun. Now the sun was dipping near to the horizon, casting the shadows long and heavy across the Crystal Empire.

Sombra spoke to him.

“I realized something, Sunburst.” he said quietly, almost inaudibly.

Sunburst turned his head to look at Sombra. He was still leaning on the balcony, still looking down at the Empire. The tension in his shoulders was gone now, replaced with exhaustion. He looked defeated. Sad.

“What is it?” Sunburst asked gently, brow furrowing. Sombra had never looked or sounded like this before.

“I thought about what you asked, the first time we spoke.” Sombra looked down at the plaza far below, where the gentle shine of the Crystal Heart was becoming visible as the evening grew darker. “I thought about it for a long time. And I realized…”

Sombra closed his eyes then, tight. He rubbed at the top of his muzzle, then put his hoof down and looked back at Sunburst.

“I didn’t have a reason.”

Sunburst’s eyes flicked between Sombra’s as he listened, waiting.

“I couldn’t understand what happened. If I had no reason, why did I do any of it?” Sombra continued, looking back out over the city. “So I thought back over everything that I had done, and… I realized what happened.”

“I took the throne of the Crystal Empire in a time of peace and prosperity. With no matters of state that needed my direct attention, I became a bit of a scholar-king - if you’ll forgive me for giving myself such a title. To feed my ravenous curiosity, I dug deep into lore that was ancient even then. I learned all manner of magics, from the most tame to the great and terrible. There was enough material to keep even the most students of magic content for several lifetimes.”

Sombra’s expression darkened.

“But I wanted more. I wanted to dig into the deepest corners and darkest depths of magic… so I did. I kept looking for the old and the strange. I found it, of course. Ancient manuscripts and scrolls, filled with knowledge of a fascinating magic unlike anything I’d ever heard of.”

He shook his head.

“Shadow Magic. Not the tame kind, playing around with physical light and its absence. The kind that can penetrate the heart and mind, and the very soul. It is a deep, dangerous magic. ‘But what was the harm?’ I told myself. ‘Understanding is a good thing! I certainly don’t have to use it…’”

Sombra let out a single, disgusted laugh.

“I was an arrogant fool. Maybe I still am.”

“What happened?” Sunburst asked softly.

“I kept going. I dug and I examined, and then I tried it - just to observe it first-hoof, of course. But it felt good. Powerful! So I made excuses to myself. A bit more can’t hurt. Just a little bit more…”

He paused, eyes looking out into the night, but not seeing the stars.

“Then one day, I wasn’t myself anymore. It was like someone else had replaced me.” He turned his eyes back on Sunburst. “The Shadow is a terrible thing. It amplifies all of your worst qualities, and twists or buries any good ones you might have. I dug too deep… and the Shadow took me.”

Sombra paused, then shook his head again.

“No, that’s not right.” He corrected, anger flashing in his eyes. “I let it take me. I let it in.”

“There are so many times I could have stopped myself, Sunburst.” said Sombra, his voice rising. “Every time I picked up those, those accursed books, I could have put them away instead, or gotten rid of them. I could have burned them - I should have!”

Then his voice fell, until Sunburst could barely hear him.

“I failed my people.” Sombra whispered. “I was a bad king.”

Sombra was quiet for a long while, looking out from the balcony into the deepening night. When he spoke again, his voice had come back up to its normal volume.

“Even now, I can't seem to accept the idea that all of this -” Sombra gestured around them at the lights below “- isn't mine. A dark corner of my being tells me it should be. I can’t seem to let it go…”

Sombra’s face was twisted with warring emotions. Anger, distress, deeply-felt sorrow and loss. And stronger than all of them, a powerful self-loathing. When, after a moment, Sombra pulled himself upright, Sunburst could tell he was trying to restore some semblance of dignity to his bearing and expression. It was a poorly constructed mask, though. The pain was still there, in his eyes and the set of his jaw.

Trembling, hesitantly, Sunburst reached over and rested his hoof on Sombra’s shoulder. He felt the gray stallion start at his touch, then relax. Sunburst tried several times to say something, but couldn’t figure out the right words. Then, with a frustrated huff, he forced himself to start talking anyway.

He told Sombra about his childhood friendship with Starlight Glimmer. How inseparable they had been, how much time they’d spent together. Then he told him about the day he’d gotten his Cutie Mark.

“I got so caught up in the excitement.” he said, pain and shame at his behavior welling up inside of him. “I left her behind, and I did it so easily. I failed her.”

He felt tears coming on, tried to hold them back. But he couldn’t help it.

“She felt so alone. I should have been there for her, I should have been a better friend. Everything she did, all the ways she lashed out, it was my fault…”

Sunburst took his hoof off of Sombra’s shoulder. He was dimly aware that Sombra was watching his face as he rubbed at his eyes, trying to wipe away the tears. He could taste the salt in his mouth, and the back of his throat burned.

“But do you know what I’ve realized? After these last couple of weeks, being with you, trying to help you, desperately trying to atone for the mistake I made with her?”

Sunburst sniffed, uncomfortably aware how loud the snotty sound he’d just made was.

“I can’t undo what happened. It’s too late for that. I apologized to her, and she’s forgiven me. But I have never forgiven myself.” Sunburst stamped his hoof against the floor, hard. “But I need to let it go, don’t I? I have to move on. I can’t fix what I did. I just… I have to make sure I do better now.”

Sunburst jumped and let out a small gasp as he felt Sombra reach out to gently press his hoof against his own. He looked up to see a small, understanding smile on that tired, bandaged face.

“I think I understand what you’re trying to tell me, and I appreciate it.” Sombra looked back over the city, now slipping into night. “But I don’t know if I can… if I’m able to do that, yet.”

Sunburst laughed weakly. “I-It takes time, doesn’t it?”

“It does…”

They were both quiet for a moment, then Sunburst spoke.

“You realize… I can't keep what you told me a secret?”

“I know.” Sombra said quietly. “I… I didn’t expect you to.”

Sunburst nodded, understanding.

They sat quietly together for a time. Night had fallen completely now. Sombra shivered next to him as a gust of chill, snow-scented wind blew through the high balcony. Maybe he was used to having his cloak for warmth, Sunburst thought. With a soft glow of yellow, he draped his cape around Sombra’s shoulders as well. It wasn’t very heavy, but it was another layer of protection at least.

“Thank you.” said Sombra, holding it in place.

“It’s strange,” he said a moment later. “I don’t remember the last time I felt properly cold… or warm. Perhaps a side-effect of… my…”

He frowned, jaw tightening as he looked down at the city lights.

“I-I could ask about getting your cloak back?” Sunburst half-asked, half-suggested. “I don’t want you catching a cold, or-”

Sombra started laughing softly, his face lighting up.

“What?” Sunburst asked, feeling his cheeks warming.

Sombra just shook his head, smiling.

They stayed up there long enough for the moon to rise, watching as the soft silvery-white light gently illuminated the city and landscape below. It looked so different at night, Sunburst thought. So peaceful, and still. No one was moving below, as far as they could see. The stars twinkled above, and were faintly reflected in faceted roofs of the crystal structures below.

Then with a sigh Sombra stood up, Sunburst’s cloak falling from his shoulders with a soft whisper of fabric against his coat.

“We should head back.” He said quietly. ”I don’t want to get you in trouble.”

Reluctantly, Sunburst agreed, and stood. With one last look out into the night, they headed down the stairs. The guards were waiting for them, and Sunburst felt bad about having them stand there for so long. He hoped they weren’t too annoyed with them. They gave no sign one way or the other, though, simply escorting them as they headed back down through the castle to Sombra’s cell.

Then they stood before the doors to the dungeon, and Sunburst felt unsure what to say or do. Sombra answered that question for him, stepping close and wrapping one of his strong forelegs around Sunburst’s neck. The guards started to move towards them, but relaxed as Sombra just gave Sunburst a gentle squeeze. Caught completely off guard, it took Sunburst a moment before to reciprocate.

“Thank you for a pleasant evening.” said Sombra, as he let go of Sunburst.

“N-No problem.” Sunburst said, adjusting his glasses on his nose. “I’m glad we could do it.”

“Good night, Sunburst.” Sombra turned and started to step through the dungeon doors, then hesitated and looked back at Sunburst. For a moment he looked like he wanted to say something, but he just nodded politely and went in.

“Good night.” said Sunburst, raising a hoof in farewell.

As he headed home that night, Sunburst’s mind was hard at work, sifting through everything Sombra had told him, everything that had happened at the top of the tower.