We All Have to Explode Sooner or Later...

by AutoPony

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Luna, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 4122

Afternoon tea between three princesses turns volatile. It's both a shock and a normal occurrence, depending on who you ask...

Once a month, Twilight Sparkle and her longtime mentor, Princess Celestia – and her younger sister, Princess Luna – meet together for a friendly visit over tea and scones.

Normally, this is a nice, relaxing time to converse and discuss anything and everything on their minds while indulging in time spent between often long-distance friends.

This is not one of those relaxing get-togethers; obvious just by Princess Celestia's late arrival to the table, things go south very, very quickly...

Stupid idea I had months ago, been having the urge to shift gears and write some random things – and now I'm free to do that.

Published 2024-10-25 11:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-10-25 11:50:01 UTC

An Explosive Afternoon

As Twilight Sparkle entered Princess Celestia's private sunroom for their monthly meeting of afternoon tea, she already sensed something amiss.

The glass-paned room that afforded a beautiful look out over Equestia's sprawling landscape seemed to be in order; the plush burgundy rug set over polished hardwood floor appeared the same as always, as did the matching gold-trimmed cushions laid out around a round mahogany table in the center of the room. The sunlight lent itself well to indoor flora, and Celestia had not passed up the opportunity to harbor some beautiful hydrangeas in shades of pink and purple, with white gardenia to complement and contrast them.

Princess Luna had only recently begun attending these get-togethers in the past six months, but she was already acclimated to the younger ruling sister's presence – and indeed, had come to cherish her company and conversation just as much as Celestia's. Seeing her already seated and awaiting company to join her was not out of the ordinary.

No, this was... something else. Something in the air that felt different, even beyond Celestia's current absence. That in itself was unusual – Celestia was always the first to arrive...

Princess Luna bowed her head to the Princess of Friendship with an accompanying small smile as she approached. "Good afternoon, Twilight Sparkle."

"Oh please, just Twilight is fine, Luna," Twilight giggled, taking her customary seat, roughly across from Luna to her right. "I think you like having me remind you there's no need to be so formal with my name."

"Tis a habit, I suppose," Luna replied, levitating the porcelain teapot off of the tray in the center of the roundtable to serve Twilight first. "I feel it is better to start with formality than to assume we are all here purely for a casual afternoon."

The dark brew steamed lightly as it filled her cup in a neat trickle, cutting off when it neared full and levitating over to Luna's cup, then to the spot laid out for Celestia. It seemed this meeting was Luna's turn to select the tea of choice, as the fragrance of Earl Grey curled up to tantalize Twilight's nose.

"I'm surprised we managed to beat Celestia to the table this time," Twilight commented, flashing an uneasy smile to follow up.

"She will be along shortly – she had a few last–minute obligations rear their proverbial ugly head, I assume," Luna answered. "How was your journey here?"

"Oh – good! I actually took your advice and took the airship this time rather than the train."

"A more pleasant and quiet ride, I trust? Not to speak ill of our train service, but airship has proven to be a cut above in quality, not to mention speed on favorable days," Luna waxed. Her magic had shifted from the teapot to a basket now, offering up a delectable assortment of scones for Twilight to choose from. A blueberry-dotted scone caught her eye at once, and she eagerly picked it out.

It was then hoofsteps began to make their way down the hall Twilight had emerged from a few moments ago. In anticipation, Twilight turned her head to look at the open doorway, eager to greet her longtime mentor and friend.

Shock did not even begin to describe the feeling Twilight experienced once her eyes took in the sight of Celestia. The normally bright-eyed, prim, and proper sun princess shuffled toward the duo already seated with a weary sigh. Celestia looked hardly able to keep her head raised as she attempted to flash a warm smile to Twilight and Luna; the bags under her eyes did nothing to help the appearance of somepony on the verge of utter exhaustion.

"Sorry, I didn't expect to be so long – even if it was only a few extra minutes," Celestia said with a tired chuckle, making her way around the table. "Good afternoon, Twilight – and my dear sister."

"Princess Celestia! I was..." Twilight awkwardly trailed off, her head suddenly emptied of all words at this sudden wrench thrown into the meeting. Meanwhile, Celestia took a seat and settled in, blind to Twilight's hangup and pause.

Every fiber of Twilight's being screamed to make note of Celestia's haggard appearance, but that would just be rude. Perhaps she was just having a very bad day? But in her years of being Celestia's personal student and the exclusive peeks behind the veil of regalia that had offered her, Twilight had never seen anything remotely like this. Even Celestia's mane looked sapped of energy, hanging limply from her form with only a shadow of the billowing wind-blown movements it normally possessed.

"Twilight Sparkle was mentioning to me she traveled by airship for this trip," Luna spoke up, nodding her head at Twilight in turn.

It seemed at least Luna understood Twilight's current hangup and wanted to cover for her. This reassurance allowed Twilight a moment to take a breath and recollect herself, taking a sip of tea...

"Sister, I must admit you look positively dreadful this afternoon," Luna followed up.

The unexpected bold comment forced Twilight to take a gulp instead of a sip at her cup. She sputtered for breath at the shock of the comment and the heat of the beverage, trying not to hack and cough in a spastic fit.

"Careful, Twilight. The tea is still very hot. It was just brewed."

Twilight fought the urge to shoot Luna a deadpan stare as she regained control; instead, her focus locked onto her mentor, whose thin smile had faded away now.

"Do I really look that bad, Luna?" Celestia questioned, looking on at her sibling as she nodded with firm conviction.

"You do. It is clear to all in this room you appear to hang on by a mere thread at this juncture," Luna answered, refusing to mince her words – and now directing her gaze to Twilight for confirmation.

Twilight shrunk down in her seat as she felt not only Luna's turquoise eyes, but the tired magenta eyes of Celestia fall upon her. "It's... you look a little tired," she spoke in a hushed tone, trying to offer an attempt at a pleasant welcoming grin despite the negative comment she gave Celestia. "But it's not a big deal as long as you feel okay – we all have off days. You know?"

"I would be confident in my convictions to utter the phrase 'I told you so,' Tia." Luna continued, sitting stoic and emotionless as she sipped at her own teacup. "I mean that phrase with all due respect, but I did my best to advise you on this matter two days ago."

"You did, I cannot argue with that," Celestia conceded with a deepening frown.

"Do you agree I was ultimately right in this matter you debated upon with me?"

"I'm... sorry, I'm a little lost here," Twilight commented, cringing as she inserted herself into what might be a discussion best left to the pair of sisters. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened two days ago?"

"Oh, it's nothing to worry about, Twilight," Celestia answered, brushing aside the meek inquiry.

"It may be nothing to worry about, but your fatigued appearance has cause for concern for those not well-versed in alicorn physiology, Celestia," Luna shot back in an icy tone. "I understand you meant well, but I am afraid your efforts have been in vain."

Celestia leaned down and rested her head on the table, staring at her teacup as steam lightly wisped out of it. "You were right, Lu. I should have listened to you," she mumbled weakly. "I've been fighting to hang on all day."

"Hang on? What do you—" Twilight stopped her questioning just as Luna raised a hoof from across the table, urging her to remain quiet for the time being.

"I believe it would be in your best interest to take care of this now rather than delay the process any longer," Luna advised her sister, pausing to take a nibble at a scone. "It would be much worse to inadvertently lose your grip in the middle of court or other official business than dealing with the consequential aftermath."

Celestia said nothing – though the pained expression while she pried herself upright again said volumes to the other two in the room – even if one was still in the dark on exact circumstances.

"I suppose – I made my bed, I have to lie in it now," Celestia quipped. She turned her attention briefly to Twilight, cracking a small smile again. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

Still perplexed, Twilight could only nod her head at the feeble assurance.

Celestia pulled herself back to all four hooves and ambled back away from the table. She made her way halfway back toward the doorway before spinning around. Her whole form had begin to glow with an odd yellow-tinged light seeming to come from within...

"Sister, could you—" Celestia started to speak, but she stopped as a transparent, glowing blue orb surrounded her. Luna's magic was at work here, creating a... a shield?

Twilight was fidgeting now in nervousness as she was forced to watch and observe with no explanation. Celestia's mane suddenly picked up energy again, fluttering with its normal movement – then surpassing it, until it looked like she was caught in a tempest. Just like the rest of her body, it began to glow; however, colors began to change, shifting from the pastels of an aurora to a seething, angry swirl of reds and oranges.

"Princess Celestia, what—"

"She will be fine, Twilight," Luna interrupted Twilight's call, her voice calm and disturbingly nonchalant. "I do recommend covering your ears – I am afraid my spell can only do so much in terms of muffling sound."

Having snapped her head back to Luna in shock at the instruction, Twilight instinctively raised her hooves and covered her ears once she saw Luna demonstrate the pose she urged. She had just enough time to turn back to see the glow around the solar Princess had grown bright enough to obscure her form—

*BOOOOM!*

A slightly muffled roar like cannon fire ripped out from the sphere, lightly jostling the china set on the table in the room and other loose items in the room. One final bright flash erupted... and when it dimmed down to a fading orange glow the magical barrier was filled with black smoke. As smoke overtook ember, it looked as if the orb itself had become a solid black mass.

"Hm. Perhaps I should have asked Tia to at least go outside. Getting rid of the smoke and soot is going to be a bit of a challenge," Twilight heard Luna lament from the other side of the table.
Trying to manage her breathing and her wits, it took Twilight several minutes of blank staring before she could tear herself from the remnants of what she had just witnessed and over to the lunar princess, who still looked just as unfazed as her voice had sounded.

"What... Princess Luna, what happened to Celestia?" Twilight finally managed to speak.

Luna's eyes were still focused on the inky black sphere as she began to fiddle with it behind Twilight, trying to reshape it without rupturing the spell. "She exploded," Luna droned flicking her gaze to the glass panes which lined the walls. "I am a bit unfamiliar with this room – do any of these windows open?"

"What?! What do you mean she exploded?!" Twilight cried. She had lost her grip with that single horrifying notion that she had witnessed and deducted, but refused to believe.

Yet it was an idea that seemed to almost bore Luna at this period in time. "Celestia suffered a sudden and dramatic increase in volume along with a rapid outward release of ener—"

"Luna, I know what an explosion is!" Twilight hollered. The outburst stopped Luna in her tracks, but not without widening her eyes and honing in on Twilight.

"Then that was a rather silly question, was it not?" Luna remarked, her tone souring just a bit as her brow furrowed. "If you would calm yourself and help me to deal with the current matter behind you, I may be able to answer the proper question you may have."

Still rattled by everything that had just transpired, Twilight was able to get a tenuous hold on her emotions. Standing up and eyeing the smoky sphere in a mix of horror, distress, and an inkling of fascination, Twilight sidestepped to the windows, easing open the first moveable pane that she remembered off the top of her head.

The orb whisked past Twilight and squeezed through the open frame – at least until getting stuck at its widest point. Twilight heard Luna mutter something under her breath, just before the barrier spell sprung a leak outside. Thick black smoke billowed out into the air, and with it, Twilight could sense a sudden increase in temperature just beyond the window she stood in front of, off to the side.

After a few moments, the sphere was emptied, and Luna's glowing blue aura dissipated. The smoke outside was taking much longer to clear, even with a light breeze. Twilight quickly shut the window again, fearful of the smoke reentering the room.

"Now then, should we resume tea while we wait?" Luna suggested, her mood and voice buoyed by the finished endeavor.

In silence, Twilight strutted back to her spot and took a seat. Her eyes still wide with befuddlement, she was locked onto Luna now and unwilling to stray away. "Princess Luna, why did Celestia 'explode,' and why are you not... you don't even seem bothered by it!"

"Well no, of course not. My sister will be back soon," Luna replied, resuming her light snack of a scone and another sip of tea. "This is nothing new, though I will say it has been quite some time since the last instance. I wonder if her delaying the process is what allowed her complete combustion, now that I think of it. Usually, there is some sort of remaining ash or—"

"Princess Luna, please. Why is this apparently a 'normal' thing?" Twilight demanded. Her patience was growing dangerously thin – and while she did not wish to be rude toward Luna, her lack of concern had begun to gnaw at Twilight's resolve as well.

"Well, have you ever considered how much magic our forms can both contain and expel at any one time? That puts stress on the body over months and years," Luna began her lecture. "That stress slowly but surely begins to propagate into cracks and fissures that weaken us as a vessel for our magic. As alicorns, we are immensely powerful and resilient, but even we as a species have our limits bound to us by nature. So, once about every one hundred twenty-seven years, four months, and nine days – give or take twenty-four to forty-eight hours – we rupture. All that magic comes out at once under high velocity and fuels a cataclysmic explosion that consumes what remains of our compromised body as just demonstrated by my sister."

Twlight's jaw dropped as Luna's spiel came to a conclusion. There was no way this was true, right? But she couldn't deny what was just experienced moments ago, and alicorns remained a little understood species among books and texts – even herself. And she was an alicorn now!

"Luna... as an alicorn – well, obviously I was sort of... uh, promoted to it – am I going to—"

"Perhaps, but I would not be afraid of the thought. It is a painless process despite the frightful and dramatic appearance," Luna spoke, offering little in terms of reassurance in her dull, methodical voice. "I can only speak for my sister and I as natural-born alicorns. Unicorns do not explode as far as I know – perhaps as an ascended alicorn, you will not be subject to the same laws of nature. It is difficult to say."

That was... sort of a relief? Twilight struggled to come up with anything else to say or ask as her mind wallowed in the absurdities of the information suddenly bestowed upon her.

...of course, how had she not asked that? If Celestia exploded – completely vaporized before her eyes, how was she going to return?

She didn't get time to ask that before the sound of hoofsteps once again made their way down the hall. Once again, Twilight turned expectantly to face the visitor – whether that was Celestia or a servant asking what the sound moments ago was... or the black cloud outside...

"Sister, was it really necessary to push me out the window?" Celestia's voice called out before she appeared. At least, it was very reminiscent of the solar princess... but it was a tad higher in pitch.

Celestia's physical appearance as she stomped into the room connected the dots – even if those dots were scattered every which way. Rather than the tall, pastel-maned mare Twilight's memories could ever recall, a filly scarcely as tall as herself appeared. The same whitish pink coat, the same sun cutie mark emblazoned on her flank, the same magenta eyes... but a normal mane. A normal mane in a monochrome pink hue.

"It varies in how long the remnants take to dissipate, you know that as well as I do," Luna spoke up, oblivious to Twilight's plight as she frantically snapped her head back and forth between the miniature Celestia and Luna. "I did not desire to continue containment for the next ten to fifteen minutes while trying to enjoy my afternoon tea."

"Right, afternoon tea..." Celestia trailed off, looking over Twilight's aghast form. "Sorry you had to see me this way. I was hoping I could hold off that process until tomorrow, and doing it before your visit... well, it's never certain how long it will be until I regain my normal form."

"You... it's— you're alright though? Nothing is..." Twilight blubbered and waved her hooves around at Celestia's appearance as she strode by and took a seat at the table again.

"She is temporarily the little sister, but otherwise, all is well," Luna remarked, smirking at the idea even as Celestia shot her a disapproving leer.

"Wait, Luna, you... with the Elements..." Twilight's wild-eyed, frenzied attention now shifted to Luna as she pointed a hoof at the lunar princess with a new realization.

"Yes, the Elements of Harmony caused me to explode when you used them during my return as Nightmare Moon," Luna nodded. "I suppose I was well overdue for that, despite being in stasis within the moon. That may be why I was no match for you six wielding the Elements – a fortunate outcome, nonetheless."

"Why don't we move on to a more pleasant, relaxing topic? Alicorns explode, yes – now we'll move on," Celestia spoke up, clapping her hooves together and beaming a bright smile toward Twilight. "Now then, Luna said you took the airship to visit us? That must have been an exciting experience..."

"Sister..."

"Yes, little sis?"

Celestia frowned at the term used for the umpteenth time since this had all unfolded hours ago. "This was never part of the plan, and you know that. I don't think you understand how hard it was to explain away this appearance to our subjects wishing to meet with me," she lamented, gesturing to her diminutive, younger self.

"Well, I suppose you should have chosen a day with fewer obligations to explode, no?" Luna suggested, continuing to find amusement with the situation as she lay sprawled out on her bed.

"You planned this well before today, didn't you?"

"The spell that prevents you from shifting your form back? I may have concocted that complex binding spell within a day after we agreed to this deal, yes."

"Because you knew you were going to lose," Celestia grumbled, prodding Luna's chest with her hoof.

"Nay, I just saw a delightful opportunity to repay the favor after years of joking about my height compared to you," Luna scoffed. "To this day, I do not understand why you inherited genes that make you so much taller."

"Alright, I'm sorry for that. Lesson learned," Celestia sighed, hanging her head. "Though I don't think you realize how much of a pain it is to be... well, normally that tall. Anywhere other than our castle, I have to watch for low door frames and light fixtures, you know."

"I am aware. Pros and cons, all of that."

"Lulu, please release the spell. It's been almost eight hours – I'm not used to legs these short," Celestia whined, giving Luna the sad eyes to plead her case further.

In turn, Luna rolled her own eyes at the display but exhaled in resignation. "Very well, I suppose I have had my fill of fun. It is beginning to grow a bit stale at this point," she conceded. Her horn lit up with a blue glow, the energy descending upon Celestia before dissipating just as quickly.

In a flash, Celestia's form shifted and grew, while her mane regained its color and ethereal qualities. As the changes stopped, Celestia took in her form and took a deep breath, smiling at the sight. "Thank you, Lu."

"No need to thank me, as you are still going to mention that I indeed lost the bet today," Luna muttered, her expression souring. "I can not believe your prized pupil was naive enough to believe that alicorns explode as a natural process of our existence."

"It's what made her such a good student, but yes, I tried telling you she's very impressionable," Celestia remarked. "You certainly were keen to seize on the opportunity. Weakened enough by the years to be just barely susceptible to the Elements of Harmony, huh?"

"I see no harm in making myself look a bit stronger in hindsight. The outcome was the same regardless of half-truths, no?"

"There was nothing truthful in that," Celestia lamented. Under her guiding magic, a pillow lifted aloft from Luna's bed and whapped her lightly on the head.

"I will see to it that goes in history books. Twilight will vouch for me – it was an idea she inadvertently created, I merely shifted some details," Luna retorted with a smirk. Returning the favor, Luna raised the same pillow and tossed it back at Celestia

Celestia parried it with a flare of her wing, holding her head high now. "Nonetheless, I won our bet. Twilight believed it, so now I get a day off with you serving in my stead, and I know just the day I want to—"

"You do not get to pick the day, Tia," Luna interrupted, shifting around on her bed to lay upright now.

"What do you mean? I won, why wouldn't I be the one to choose?" Celestia asked, lowering her head to gawk at her younger sister.

"That was never in the deal. You just get a day off, sister," Luna reiterated.

"You think you get to choose the day? Why do you get that option?"

"Why do you assume winning gives you a free day and the choice of day?"

Both sisters stared intently at each other, waiting for the other to come up with a meaningful rebuttal. But minutes passed without a word spoken – this was a stalemate.

"Why don't we hold off on deciding a day?" Luna proposed, a thin smile beginning to creep upon her face.

It was a smile that Celestia began to match now as that same idea Luna had lit up in her mind. "I think I can do that. My day in mind is still two months away. You thinking on another bet?"

"A bet next month to see who gets to choose the day," Luna confirmed, pointing a hoof at Celestia. "You win, and you get the choice. I win, I choose. How about it?"

"I'm game, I know my student far better than you," Celestia boasted.

"But it may be what you don't know that could harm your chances," Luna taunted. "But my one-on-one during your absence gave me a better insight into Twilight Sparkle. We will see at next month's afternoon tea. But do you have an idea for the bet?"

"Eh, let's give it some thought. I don't want to make this too easy for myself, I should give you a chance," the elder sister snickered.

"Fair enough – let us brainstorm and reconvene on the plan at the end of the week," Luna agreed, unfurling a wing and directing it toward Celestia. Celestia's wing met hers, with blue and white feathers meshing together for a moment.

Deal.