That Which Lies in Snow

“Saving the coronation of a new ruler for an entire village and all that, all in a day's work for us!”, Rainbow said as she fluttered proudly above the old reindeer shaman.

He gave a merry laugh. "Thou dost puff and preen like a summer cock crowing afore the dawn! I may not but say this pride is meetly bought and paid for, yet prithee, think not that thy labors were for the pomp of crowns or the gilded wreath of ceremony. Nay, the coronation was but a trifle in this matter. The discord thou hast mended lay deeper, festering as a wound untended. Hadst thou let it linger, the rift betwixt hearts would have summoned shadows far blacker than any marring of our coronation could conjure."

Rainbow cocked her head, “uh, say what now?”.

The shaman fixed her with an appraising look. "Surely thou hast known—this forest, this Everfree, is ever watchful, and doth drink deeply of passions unbridled. Anger, despair, envy—it is of such feelings of ill will that it makes its banquet. Or hast thou ne'er felt their shadow looming when tempers fray?"

She'd been angry plenty of times before, but looming shadows didn't ring a bell, so she shook her head slowly. Even if she didn't buy any of what the shaman was saying, this was starting to sound like a campfire story, and she loved a good campfire story. She found herself leaning in to listen more closely.

Concern flickered across the elder deer's eyes. "Unknowing, I see. Then it is a mercy thou hast not yet met their icy wrath. Though thou mayst be shielded by thy virtue from the lesser perils, this is a doom that once encircled Equestria itself, and cares not a whit for any mortal power."

That did sound vaguely familiar, and not in a good way. "Those were the, uh… wind thingies? From the founding of Equestria, right?"

The shaman gave a serious nod, and there seemed to be a chill to his words as he spoke. "Mark me well, Avatar of Loyalty. The stronger the bond betwixt souls, the graver the peril. And the more their bonds be entwined with others, the further the ruin may spread its reach. Those who bear the will and hope of a whole village, if discord had befallen them, may have brought down a final blizzard to end its tale in the cruelest tragedy. And had greater mishap befallen the founders of our land, the breadth and span of Equestria would even now remain an utter desolation."

Rainbow chuckled nervously, noticing now that she could see her own breath. Buck, when did it get so chilly? The mare shivered, “well, anyways, we probably should get home before it gets too late”, she said, turning back to where Applejack was standing, only to see she had moved several paces ahead, sitting on her haunches.

The shaman gave a humble bow. "I wish thee well, loyal champion." Straightening up, he cast a quick glance between Rainbow Dash and Applejack. "I have but one parting word, if thou'rt inclined to hear it. I shall not gainsay thy mastery in matters of harmony, yet experience is a lens by which my aged eyes might alight upon dangers too distant to spy unaided. I pray thee, be ever wary of the weight of shame upon thy soul. Shame unspoken is a rot that festers unseen amid the roots, and when the branches begin to wither, the damage done is beyond all cure, for a wound unseen may yet be mortal. If you cannot find trust within yourself, then how may you expect another to place their trust in you?"

Rainbow’s hairs stood on end, it was definitely getting cold out now. A shiver ran down her spine and she promptly landed to conserve energy. “Y-yea... I mean, thanks, uhm...”, she responded, a bit shaken by the sudden personal change of topic, “I’m... gonna go now...”.

Without another word, she trotted to the orange mare. Applejack breathed a sigh and stood back up as she heard Rainbow approaching. “Ready to go?”, Rainbow asked as she stepped a few paces ahead.

Applejack nodded. "Uh-huh."

Rainbow took the lead as the two began to make their way through the forest. They didn’t get far before she heard her marefriend speak up.

“Hey, Rainbow... We need to talk...”

Rainbow cocked her head curiously, instinctively dreading the conversation to come. “Yea, what’s up?”, She asked.

“I...”, AJ paused, as if contemplating her next words carefully, making sure she wanted to say them at all, “Ah can’t do this no more...”.

Rainbow’s eyes widened, the only indication of her true emotions that she couldn’t stop. She knew exactly what Applejack meant, but still in denial, she asked anyway, “W-what are you saying, AJ?”

“Ah’m sayin’ this ain’t gonna work between us!”, AJ breathed a heavy sigh, creating a quickly fleeting cloud of visible vapor in the cold night air.

“B-but”, Rainbow’s voice faltered, her mind clawing for a proper response. “W-why!?”, is all she could muster, “Did I...”. Rainbow stopped herself, ‘Did I really buck it up that bad?’.

“Y’all know darn well why”, AJ responded with a melancholic but stern tone, not yet breaking her downtrodden expression..

“What, because of Apple Bloom? Because she fell? I’m a Wonderbolt, AJ! Saving falling ponies is part of my day job! Do you honestly think I’d let her get hurt?”, Rainbow released all of her frustration as she responded.

“I know darn well yer a good flier!”, Applejack’s somber demeanor quickly shattered as she retorted. “And woulda’ trusted ya if y’all’d just told me the darn truth!”, Applejack paused to catch her breath, “but naw, y'all were too caught up impressin’ the fillies fer somethin’ as silly as honesty!”

“Yea well… I...”, Dash exhaled, exasperated, “I’m sorry I lied, ok? Is that what you want? Nopony got hurt so can you let it go already?”

There was a howl in the wind. Even the pegasus, who was trained to fly through a vast array of climates, was starting to actively shiver and wince at the pelting cold snow as it struck like pin pricks against her face.

“No! That’s not what ah want, I want you to take responsibility for darn near gettin’ a filly killed! And it was mah sister no less!”, she galloped ahead, before turning and prodding Dash’s chest with her hoof, their forward movement halted as the earthmare unleashed her verbal assault. “How would y’all have felt if it were Scootaloo?”

“The exact same way!”, Dash was raising her voice now, the mention of Scootaloo striking a nerve, “Because I would’ve saved her the exact same way!”

“T’ch, figures...” AJ hissed, ”Y’all don’t care about nothin’ but yerself! Element of Loyalty mah left flank! Yer too darn full o’ yerself fer anypony to rely on!”

The pegasus stepped back, “I… I just…”. Before she could properly respond, there was a crack from the trees nearby, as an otherwise sturdy pine cracked under the weight of snow and pressure of wind. Rainbow felt frozen, both literally and metaphorically, able to do little more than raise her gaze to the falling tree.

‘Yer too darn full o’ yerself fer anypony to rely on!’, was it true? Was Rainbow Dash, bearer of the element of loyalty, unworthy of trust? Had she really bucked it up?

Rainbow was snapped out of her daze as a set of sturdy, orange rear hooves impacted the tree. The tree splintered, diverted from its path— a path that would have been lethal to the pegasus. The blue mare’s eyes were wide as her savior looked down on her.

“C’mon”, Applejack said, “it’s too dangerous to try and make it home in this weather, best find shelter and wait it out”. Applejack squinted, looking ahead through the blizzard the best she could.

Instinctively, Rainbow responded to the stress of the situation by attempting to take flight, but was quickly swept up by the wind, causing her to crash back down into the snow. She fell prone and grunted in pain. It was then she noticed the stump of the tree that had nearly crushed her. The stump and now log were covered in deep gashes, as if it had been crudely hacked at with some sort of blade or claw.

“Ah see a cave!” AJ said, her voice only barely audible over the howling of the wind. The strong and sturdy earth pony helped the lighter weight pegasus to her hooves.

The two made it through the dense storm together. Even adjusted to strong winds for her intense wonderbolt training, it was hard for Rainbow to keep her eyes open as the crystals of snow bit at her eyes whenever she’d let them. Rainbow let AJ lead, turning her head back the way they came, looking in the direction of the wind instead of taking its full winter's wrath straight to her face.

Rainbow saw them then, two pairs of eyes, beady with reflected moonlight hovering over the place where the tree had fallen. And as soon as they were noticed, they vanished into the storm.

Finally, Rainbow and AJ collapsed into the cave. “F-Fire”, AJ shivered out.

Rainbow nodded, She and AJ had been on enough camping trips to know, already, who would do what when getting a fire started as quickly as they could. Like well crafted clockwork, Rainbow gathered some leaves and sticks from around the cave, while AJ built the rocky fire pit. Leaves were set over small bits of log and sticks in the firepit, a meager collection, but one that would have to do. Rainbow quickly struck a flint and lit the campfire.

AJ slumped over as the light filled the cave, “Ah’m gonna try and get a few hours’ sleep, y’all probably should too”.

“W-what?”, RD stammered, her mind turning to the eyes she’d seen outside, “S-shouldn’t we keep watch?”

“Watch fer what? The fire’ll ward off any predators that can even survive in this storm”, AJ stated matter-of-factly, before flopping herself down into as comfortable of a sleeping position as possible on a dirt floor.

The pegasus hesitated, peering back out into the raging storm in the dead of night. AJ was right, they’d camped in the Everfree plenty of times, and they’d only ever needed a tent and a fire to keep safe. Still, Rainbow felt a sense of dread, those eyes wouldn’t leave her mind.

In the end Rainbow relented, not wanting another argument. “Alright...”, she said as she lay down on the dirt floor, and a deep, restless sleep quickly took her.

—--------------------

A scream echoed through the ghastly gorge, followed by a sickening wet crack. Rainbow Dash swooped overhead, a trail of dazzling rainbow following her. She wasn’t fast enough. Even with the speed boost of a sonic rainboom, she’d missed by a hair.

“Oh buck, oh no, no no no!”, She touched down next to the small form of the earth bound filly.

The filly had landed on a protruding rock. The position couldn’t have been worse. Already, blood rose from her throat. Her lower back twisted at an unnatural angle. The ribs in the area of impact were clearly broken, likely puncturing her right lung.

“D-Dash...”, Apple Bloom whimpered out, before a painful wet cough rattled her broken form. A torrent of blood filled her mouth and nose, before splattering out onto her snout and chest. She inhaled, painful and ragged, only for more scarlet fluid to pool in her throat.

“Hey, look at me, you’re going to be ok! Everything’s going to be fine!”, Rainbow said, more to herself as she attempted to pick up the filly in her hooves, only to feel her upper half wince in pain and a gurgling sob to escape the wounded pony.

“It hurts...”, her quiet whisper of gargled words was accompanied by even more crimson fluid. The air was filled with a harsh, metal tang as the earth filly’s eyes filled with tears. “Dash... ah’m scared...”. More painful coughs racked her tiny body, each one more painful than the last. “Ah... ah don’t wanna die, Dash...”.

The pegasus helplessly cradled the filly’s lightly spasming body. There was nothing she could do. Apple Bloom cried quietly in Rainbow’s forelegs.

“Rainbow Dash?”, Scootaloo asked, as she approached from behind on her scooter, “That was awesome! You swooped in at the last minute! Like a superhero!”

Apple Bloom’s fearful sobs started to become more forced and painful, her bloodied coughs getting weaker as she struggled to draw breath. Rainbow felt the small body’s spams become weaker, and weaker as the little filly drowned in her own blood.

“Rainbow?”, the smaller pegasus’ voice sounded a bit unsure now, “you did catch her, right? Dash... Hey, Dash?”

“Dash?”, suddenly the voice sounded different. The accent was enough to give away who it belonged to.

Rainbow turned back to see Applejack’s concerned expression. She was standing where Scootaloo had been only seconds before. Tears began to streak down Rainbow’s cheeks, “I didn’t mean for this to happen...”, she softly whimpered, “I’m sorry...”.

Applejack’s eyes went wide as she realized what was going on. She rushed to Apple Bloom’s side, roughly shoving Rainbow out of the way.

She gasped, the body of her little sister laying before her. She extended a hoof, caressing the small earth pony’s cheek. Apple Bloom’s eyes were unfocused, missing that sparkle that an excitable young crusader like her should’ve had. Dried tears left streaks down her face, and her maw and chest were a bloody mess.

She was still warm, but she wasn’t breathing.

Apple Bloom was dead.

“Dash...”, her voice was stern, but ragged, choking on unimaginable sorrow, she shuddered, “what did y’all DO?!”, she exploded on Rainbow.

“It... it was an accident”, Rainbow replied through tear-filled sobs.

“That t’ain’t what I asked...”, AJ gritted her teeth, righteous anger welling up in her, “Y’all said y’all were just gonna supervise some basic scooter tricks with her and Scootaloo...”. Her furyborn, mournful gaze snapped to the pegasus, “You lied to me, Dash!”.

Those words echoed in Rainbow’s head. She lied to Applejack, just a little white lie, and now Apple Bloom, her future sister-in-law, the little filly she had tried so hard to impress, who was so excited when she learned Rainbow was gonna be like a new big sister through her relationship with Applejack, was dead because of her.

“I’m sorr-”

“Sorry don’t raise the dead!”, Applejack yelled back at Rainbow, not even letting her finish her doomed attempt at rectifying the situation. “It... it shoulda’ been you! Hay, t’would’ve been easier if you’d just died too!”, the mournful farmpony began to sob, anger and sorrow clouding her judgment. She hoofed at the ground, the older sister’s tears mingled with the crimson streaks coming from Bloom’s nostrils and mouth.

The words struck Rainbow to her core, a shard of ice that started in her heart and spread through the rest of her body. The cold wasn’t exclusively metaphorical, however, she could feel the wind nipping at her tear stained cheeks as the sky darkened overhead.

Rainbow couldn’t bring herself to respond, what could she say? She imagined if it had been Scootaloo. She’d never trust herself around her surrogate little sister again, not after this, not after what her recklessness had done, what she’d done.

“Ah... ah never wanna see you again”, Applejack continued, her tone equally mournful and angry, barely able to speak between sobs, turning her back to the guilt stricken rainbow mare, “Don’t follow me, don’t come to Sweet Apple Acres no more, and, if you’re really sorry, get the hay out of Ponyville! We’re done, Rainbow Dash!”. She carefully hoisted her sister’s ruined body over her shoulder, and started to walk away.

Rainbow was left alone with her guilt, watching her rival, her best friend, her lover, walk away right before her very eyes. And the worst part was it was all her fault.

Rainbow wasn’t sure how long she sat there, long enough for the falling snow to leave a coat of frigid white fluff covering her cyan body. And soon she heard the clink of metal horseshoes behind her. “Guilt can truly cloud our vision, can it not?” The regal but calm voice filled Dash’s ears over the sound of whipping winds “It eats us alive if we let it, leading to nothing but shame and fear where our pride used to be”

Rainbow was silent, and Luna continued, “This nightmare is born of guilt, You torture yourself and are afraid to ask for forgiveness because you, yourself, don’t believe you deserve it, you cannot forgive yourself for fear of what could have happened, and what you believe may happen again. I know this feeling all too well.”

There was another moment of silence, a moment broken only by the howling of harsh winds. Rainbow turned and looked up at Luna. “I almost killed her… that could have been real, if I’d just been a few seconds slower.”

“But you weren’t”, Luna responded, “Do not misunderstand, I’m not saying to drop your guard, nor to let something like this happen again, but to learn from your mistakes, you must allow yourself to let go of the guilt they bring. Wake now, Rainbow Dash, and learn to make peace with yourself, so that you may make peace with the one you truly love the most”.

—--------------------

Rainbow opened her eyes and sat up. The fire was dying down and AJ was staring intently out into the blizzard.

“Y'all hear that?”, she asked.

Rainbow listened, hearing nothing as a few minutes passed. And then, barely audible over the storm outside, she heard it. “Hello? Anypony? Ah’m cold, and… Ah’m not sure where ah am!” a filly was calling out for help. The pegasus recognized the distressed voice immediately: Apple Bloom.