Teamwork is Overrated

by BoneCruncher47

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Comedy, Romance
Length: 6485

Who needs teamwork, when you got some of these

A Unicorn and Pegasus appear from the shadows and emerge into the world of Equestria. The Unicorn, a Laidback nerd, and the Pegasus, a knowledgeable retard, go off onto an adventure to befriend the mane six, and screw up society with them. With some ya mom jokes, and maybe an occasional fuck you, teamwork maybe not be so necessary. Will they succeed? Or will they become fuck ups and fail miserably? Or maybe they'll find a chair and knock somepony out.

Warning: This fic has a high use of Swearing, if you can't handle swearing, then don't read this fic

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-10-18 08:32:24 UTC

Chapter 1: A curious coincidence

Authors note:

For those who can read, I have one simple request, PLEASE tell me if the writing in this is any good. Because technically this is my second fic, my first fic is still under development. But back to topic, I would appreciate it if you tell me in da comment section below if my writing skills are any good, it would be nice to know C: Now get ur ass back to dat fic, cause I’m gonna start clopping to some of dat stuff, yea…

The sky was filled with life, Clouds blossomed into rain, and the sun still shun over the land. The peaceful meadows lunged under the skies and let the light show the world the true beauty of mother nature’s great work. The trees sat at the side, letting the shade run under them, and leaving the wind soaring through the branches, letting few leaves drop to the ground. A few birds chirped out their songs on some branches, the branches swayed a bit, but the birds stayed as they continued their song. A world of great peace seemed impossible, until the day when someone would find his fate, to live in this world.

His eyes slowly slid open, he laid in a forest, the surroundings were completely different to where he was last time. Slowly rubbing his eyes, he got up, his heart raced as he realized that he was lost, and had no idea how he got here. It wasn’t long until he noticed, he wasn’t human, he was a four legged creature. The only thing he could do to release his fear was to let it out in a loud scream.

“FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU”

Nearby birds flew away from the source of the loud noise, the ‘boy’ quickly ran to the pond by his side, passing something that seemed familiar, and looked in the water. The reflection revealed a unicorn, the coat was a light grey, with a darkened brown mane. His eye’s stayed the same colour, the chocolate colour that followed him through his entire life. The most notable feature was the horn emerging from his mane which, just like his coat, was grey. The unicorn wanted to scream in terror as he realized where he was, he was in Equestria. He had seen the show, read fan fictions, but he would never have imagined that he would be transported to this make believe world.

The only thing that stopped him from doing anything was the familiar object that he had passed by. He turned his head, and was greeted by the sight of his trusty laptop bag.

“How, did that get here?” questioned the unicorn as he wandered towards his bag.

Inside the bag was, well, his laptop, still in great shape, the power cord was gone, much to his dismay. He sighed as he awkwardly unzipped the bag with his mouth and lifted the lid of his laptop with his new horn, which he used as levering tool. He then realized another problem, he lacked fingers to even operate the laptop with. The unicorn released a painful sigh, first he was in a strange dimension, and now his most precious item was a pile of junk. After he had closed his eyes for a few minutes to think, he sighed and zipped the bag up. If he was in Equestria, he needed to know where Ponyville was, and being in the middle of possibly the Everfree Forest, he had to advance.

Once he had finished putting the strap of his bag over his body, the unicorn started marching past the overgrown trees, feeling the leaves hit against him. He felt going left from the pond was the right way to Ponyville, hoping not to cross paths with only thing he truly feared, the dreaded manticore.

It had been a couple of hours, and all he could see was the same thing, trees, trees, and more trees. The unicorn groaned. He really wanted to get out of the godforsaken forest. The thing that annoyed him the most was the wind, it was a very windy day, which he had anticipated when it blew a dead tree into his path. At this point, he wanted to punch the jerk which had brought him into this world. He wished that he had been teleported into the town instead of getting teleported into the forest.

“Why the fuck does God hate me? I have never sinned in my life, the only sinners are everybody else!” The unicorn muttered

“Last time I checked, I wasn’t the one trying to look like some fucking gangster wannabe, wearing my bloody hat backwards..” The unicorn continued

“And to make shit worse, I have my laptop with me, its like they are trolling me, like, “Oh hey I’m just going to give you your computer, cause you can’t do shit with it” seriously, what is with that?”

“But now that I think about it, if Celestia brought me here, wouldn't she send Twilight and her friends to find me? On the other hand, she probably would have sent me to Ponyville in the first place.”

“Maybe Discord se- No, he is trapped inside a statue, he was friggin stoned last time I checked.”

“Actually, I just realized that I don’t remember my name, I can remember everything else, just, names, odd, meh, maybe my computer has my name in it, once I find a work around..”

So many things were going through his head, and when he stopped to focus on one, he would talk to himself, it was a habit he developed from playing games by himself, it kept him entertained, and sane. A loud scream echoed through the forest, and a fearsome roar followed it, the unicorn froze in fear, praying to whomever that he would survive. The scream continued, and the the unicorn slowly noticed that the scream was getting closer, and closer, in fact, he could make out a darkened figure from the trees behind him. Trying to get a closer look, he could just barely make out what the runaway pony looked like.

It was a Pegasus, the coat was the colour of the night sky, black, his mane a deep maroon. It took only moments before he realized what the Pegasus was running from, he was running from a furious Manticore. Quickly turning around, the unicorn started sprinting through the leaves and grass on the ground, dodging the roots that stuck out of the ground. Turning his head back every few seconds didn’t seem to help, the unknown pony and the manticore were get closer and the screaming grew louder.

“Dude, fucking fly, instead of screaming like a little girl!” cried out the unicorn

“I don’t know how to fly!” yelled back the Pegasus, ceasing the screams

“What? What kind of fucking Pegasus are you?”

“Well use your magic if you are so great.”

“I don’t even know how to use magic, I just got here!”

“Well goes to show that you’re just another fucking hypocrite!”

“Shut up!”

“No you!”

“No fuck you!"

“Just keep running, unless you want to face the Manticore yourself”

“Dude, that is fucking suidsida-“

The unicorns words were cut short as he realized that the Manticore was gone.

“Hey, the Manticore is gone.”

“Seriously?” The Pegasus turned his head and, amazingly, the Manticore was gone.

“That was some close shit.” yelled out the Pegasus

“Well keep running anyways.”

“Nah, not like that I want to find out if the Manticore is hiding, and then he murders me." The Pegasus replied, snidely.

“Shut up.”

“No fuck you.”

The rest of the trip continued on with a lot of fuck yous, and some Shut ups. What seemed like arguing and hatred, was actually them getting along really well. It took them only an hour until they finally stopped, the end of the forest could be seen in the far distance. The unicorn panted heavily, he had never walked this far in his life, it seemed like an impossible distance. The unicorn lifted his head up, and noticed that tips of the pegasi's mane were white, his eyes an ocean blue.

“Hey!” called out the unicorn

“What?” replied the confused Pegasus

“What’s your name?”

“Honestly, I can’t remember, how about you?”

“Me neither.”

“Well, if we are going to stick together for a while we should get to know each other. So where do you live?”

“The planet Earth or, to be more specific, Australia.”

“Wow, same here. What a coincidence.” The pair of ponies walked a short distance before the unicorn asked his mysterious companion another question.

“So how old are you? I’m twenty-three.”

“Twenty-two.” The pegasus said with no emotion in his voice, “What high school did you go to?”

“Wisteria High”

“I know of it, got any school stories?”

“Well, I remember my best friend was quite the prankster, always getting himself into trouble, anyway, this one time we were in class and this guy left his cell phone in his coat and went to go to the computers at the school library. So we took the phone out of his coat, no keypad lock, and uploaded sex sounds onto his phone. We sent it via Bluetooth and cranked his volume up all the way. We put it back in his coat. Anyway, this teacher is in the hallway working on some posters when he walked back in and resumed the class. The dude came back about ten minutes later and sat down. My buddy, who was sitting 2 rows from the front, against the wall, rang his phone and well, yea, you can guess what happened next.” The unicorn said, trying to muffle his laughter

.

The pegasus stopped in his tracks. He turned to the unicorn and spoke with a slowly increasing enthusiasm sneaking into his voice “Did he always wear a dark red newsboy cap and black zip-up jacket?”

“Well yea w-.” The realization hit him.

“Niko, my cousin!”

“Holy shit! My bro, why didn't I realize that you were him? Bro hug time!”

The Pegasus, and the unicorn did a mini hug, it lasted for 10 seconds before they realized how gay it looked.

“Okay, now, we go off, onto the grand adventure of the shits, and the Dinosaurs, and the yea, yea” exclaimed the unicorn as he lead the way. The Pegasus followed behind him, following the unicorn out of the forest, the light that emerged from the entrance was blinding, but being in a shady forest was getting a bit old. As the duo exited the forest, Ponyville was in view, they were speechless at the sight, it was better than what it showed on the show.

“Holy fuck, it's Ponyville” exclaimed the Unicorn

“No shit Sherlock.”

“Fuck you.”

"No burn in hell."

The unicorn couldn’t help but put a smirk on his face, having these fun arguments was funny, that was the only reason why they did this.

“Well you should shut up cause your mom said that you weren’t brushing your teeth properly.”

“Shut up.”

“No fuck you.”

“No fuck you and I hope you die in a fi-.“

“HEY!”

The ‘conversation’ ended as a Pink pony bounced toward them, it was obvious who this mare was, it was Pinkie Pie. She stopped right in front of the duo, giving then a wide grin that could go on for miles, everypony knew that she loved meeting new ponies. The unicorn sighed, giving the Pegasus a sign that he should talk.

“Good day to you madam, me and my asso-. ”

“Hello, OH MY GOSH, You’re new aren't you?!”

“Um, yes, I uhh, need assistanc-.“

“WONDERFUL, I’m going to set up a welcome party for you two, oh its going to be SO great, there is going to be DOUBLE the cakes, DOUBLE the Cupcakes, DOUBLE the gummy fun time, and DOUBLE the FUN!” Before the pegasus could say anything, the pink pony turns into a pink blur, and disappeared from the face of Equestria. The unicorn groaned as he rubbed the area between his eyes with his hoof, and looked up for a brief second.

“This is going to be a long day.”

Chapter 2: Brotherhood

The pegasus briefly looked at his unicorn bro; his facial expression showed a slight hint of annoyance, they both knew it was going to take a while before they could meet Twilight. The unicorn went back to being the leader, he didn't give a shit, and meeting Twilight was his top priority. The pegasus sighed, flicked his phone out of seemingly nowhere and, using his wings, started going through his Team Fortress two soundboard, playing a few heavy weapons guy lines. The unicorn was leading the pegasus into town, the road was just smooth dirt covered across the ground. The houses were simple wooden structures buried in white paint, the roofs were made of hay and for some odd reason, the houses seem stable.

“Can you stop that shit?” asked the unicorn, the annoyance in his voice was obvious.

“Stop what?”

“You bloody well know, the soundboard, stop it, I’m trying to think here”

“Nah, I'm good.”

“Seriously dude, it’s pissing me off, I’m trying to figure out how we’re going to approach Twilight, and you are just dicking around.”

“I don’t think we need a tactical plan to deal with Twilight.”

“You get what I fucking mean.”

“Whatever.”

There was a brief silence between the two, the silence was broken with a couple of Pyro lines, mentioning something about “Mmph” and “Mhhhhoooo!”

“Just do me a favor, and stop playing the stupid soundboard, or else I’ll have a serious conversation with your mother about your behavior young man!”

“Fuck you!”

“Well stop fucking around with your phone.”

“Fine.”

The duo arrived at the library, it actually looked far better than how it was presented in the show. The branches on the tree swayed slightly, which was not surprising considering it was a windy day. The bros approached the front door, a few ponies stared at the duo, the unicorn thought that the reason was the laptop bag that was strapped onto him.

“Okay man, what I’m about to do is knock on Twilight's door, don’t look suspicious, or else shit will go down, and we may never get to taste Pinkies special surprise cake!” whispered the unicorn.

The Pegasus gulped, he really wanted to try some of that cake, considering that the cake was not a lie this time. The unicorn lifted his hoof and knocked on Twilight's door, no answer. After 3 tries, the unicorn gave up.

“Fuck this.” the unicorn growled.

“May I make a suggestion? Sugarcube Corner?”

“Fine.”

“Hey I don’t make the rules here, I just enforce them.”

“Shut up.”

“No you.”

“No fuck you.”

“Dude, you need to calm the fuck down.”

“And all I want is to go home at the moment, but no, I need to take the long fucking way!”

“Actually, have you noticed how there are very few ponies around?"

“Now that you mention it, yes, there is barely anyone out here, maybe they are all staying home because of the wind?”

“That is a retarded reason.”

“Like your mom.”

“Well you keep having sex with her...”

“Okay I admit, you got me there”

The duo laughed at the little joke, and within minutes they arrived at the front of Sugarcube corner, it looked like a real life version of the ginger bread home that the witch lived in, in Hansel and Gretel. Noises of what sounded like cheering and dubstep came from inside, the bros knew that the party has already started. The pegasus sighed, walked up to the entrance, and slightly opened the door. Within seconds, pink hooves grabbed him and pulled him in, quickly closing the door afterwards.

“The fuck?”

The unicorn slowly approached the door, then, unlike his friend, he opened the door fully, inside was a large crowd of dancing ponies, they all seemed like they were dancing to dubstep. The ceiling had a disco ball, lights went everywhere, and there was also a table with food on the side. The unicorn couldn’t help himself; he quickly ran to the food and started digging into the sweets. There was cupcakes, candy, and even punch that tasted delicious, food was one way to attract a man, that and bouncy titties.

“Oh there you are!” came a voice from behind.

The unicorn quickly turned around to see his bro with Pinkie Pie doing some awesome break dancing.

“Well at least I know where you are!” the unicorn exclaimed.

“And yet you didn’t attempt to find me.”

“Hey, you know I like food.”

“Yea, but I’m saving my appetite for the cake.”

“Well, I can fit this and the cake.”

“Whatever.”

“Have you seen Twilight?”

“Um, yea, a couple of times, but she is deep in the crowd of ponies.”

“What?!”

“Yea, I saw her when I got taken in here, she seemed busy having fun, within a crowd of what looked like a hundred ponies.”

The unicorn groaned “Now it seems impossible to get to her.”

“Not exactly, once Pinkie announces the cake, we may have a chance to find Twilight.”

“Why would that be the case?”

“Because everypony would have to stop, giving us a perfect chance to find Twilight, and take her to a place where we can privately talk to her.”

“Ooh, I like where this is going.”

“Heh, unfortunately we don’t have time to fuck the mane six.”

“True, but when do you think Pinkie will announce the cake?”

“Maybe half an hour from now, I don’t know.”

“Perfect, we have to play the waiting game.”

“Yes, but during the waiting game, we can locate Twilight, and ask her to come with us when the cake is getting announced.”

“Why didn’t I think any of this?”

“Cause you’re Pinkie, and I am the Brain.”

“Oh god that show.”

“Yes, THAT show.”

“Well, we better start locating Twilight.”

“Agreed”

The duo quickly started trying to locate Twilight within the hundreds of ponies, sure, a purple unicorn would be easy to spot, but not if the only light source you had was just random colours. It was easier said than done at this point, it seemed absolutely impossible to find her until the lights came on. It made such a great difference, Twilight was located somewhere in the middle of the crowd, now that she was found, the duo had to keep an eye on her. All Twilight was doing was dancing, she was a bad dancer, but nopony seemed to mind. After a couple of minutes a loud voice erupted from the far side of the room.

“MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE?” yelled out Pinkie from the far side of the room.

Shortly after she yelled that, everypony became quiet, however, Twilight started walking towards the far side of the room that Pinkie was at.

“Oh shit, she is getting away.” whispered the pegasus.

“We can’t lose her now, after we have finally located her.” whispered the unicorn.

The two ponies moved through the crowds of ponies, some big and some small. They got to the far side of the room, ignoring Pinkies Speech, trying to follow Twilight. Twilight finally stopped when she was near Pinkie, the bros were slightly pissed off that they could have just waited there. The pegasus walked up to Twilight, and before he could do anything, Pinkie Pie quickly grabbed him.

“And this is the new pegasus in town! Say Hi everypony!” yelled out Pinkie as she held the pegasus in the air, the unicorn face hoofed.

A loud wave of noises burst from the crowd, only barely making out, ‘hi’, ‘yo’, ‘hello’, ‘what’s up’, and even ‘howdy’.

“Oh yea, sorry Mr pegasus, but I didn’t catch your name, what is your name?” asked Pinkie.

All eyes were staring on the pegasus, he had to think of a name, quickly.

“Um, my name is, uhh, Shadow Mane!” replied the pegasus.

Pinkie dropped "Shadow" on the ground and put a grin on her face.

“Well, welcome to Ponyville Shadow Mane!” yelled out Pinkie, a cheer from the crowd could be heard.

Pinkie turned her head over to the unicorn, the unicorn knew that he was in deep shit. Pinkie Pie quickly grabbed the unicorn and shoved him into the air

.

“And this is the unicorn that had recently come into Ponyville as well!” again yelled out Pinkie Pie.

The crowd again roared in a loud greeting, except this time they weren’t as loud as before, disgraceful fucks. The unicorn groaned, and his heart started beating faster, he had to think of a name before Pinkie asked, he NEEDED a name, or else, who knows what would happen.

“So, what is your name?” asked Pinkie.

“Oh yes, um, my name, my name, is, uh, yea, my name, is, umm.. Spirit Fire!” announced the Unicorn.

Muttering could be heard in the crowd, obviously his name was a bit unusual, Spirit groaned as Pinkie lowered him to the ground.

“Okay everypony, let's give Shadow and Spirit their ca-.“

“Actually no, I have serious business with Twilight Sparkle, I can’t wait any longer at the moment.” interrupted Spirit. His voice was was louder then he had intended most of the ponies heard him.

The crowd stared Spirit, Twilight just glared at him, as if she didn’t know what he meant.

“I’m sorry, but, I don’t recall doing business with a Spirit Fire…”

“Gah, look, Twilight, I need your help with something that is dire, well not just me, but Shadow the hedgehog over here needs the same help”

“Hey, its not my fault if we happen to share the same colour scheme!” called out Shadow.

Twilight didn’t get the joke as she stared at Spirit, Spirit sighed.

.

“Lets just go outside….”

Twilight nodded, and the trio left the gingerbread house, Twilight stopped next to the door, she waited for an explanation. Spirit looked at Shadow, giving him a sign that he should explain the situation.

“Okay, Twilight Sparkle, we have an otherworldly problem, we are not Ponies, as you call them, we were once human. We came from a universe where Humans are the intelligent breed of animals, ponies are just minor animals. We came from a planet called Earth, with technology from our world; we suffer a minor case of amnesia where we can’t remember our own names. However, the reason why we knew you were great at magic is because we have known about this place for a while now. You are the main character for a show, and if you don’t know what a show is, a show is basically an animated series. Anyways, you are the main character for a show called ‘My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic’ and your 5 friends are the main characters. We have both watched the show and we know things, we know about Spike’s crush on Rarity, we know about the cutie pox, and we know about Rainbow Dashes obsession with books. We also know that you are the greatest magical user in Ponyville, so we ask of one request. Will you send us back to earth by doing some sort of teleportation spell that goes through dimensions?”

Twilight froze, she stared at the pegasus in disbelief, but she also showed signs of belief, she was trying to choose if what he said was true, or a lie.

“Please, I want to go home, I want to go back to the life I had.” begged Spirit.

Twilight tilted her head, "Are you sure the punch wasn't spiked? Because this seems highly ill-."

"Once you were a week late sending your next friendship report to Princess Celestia, so you started trying to find any excuse to send her a letter. You went crazy, at one point, you talked to yourself in a puddle. Then, you used the "Want it, Need it" spell and accidentally brainwash the whole town into fighting over a old toy. Now you only send her letters when you learn new things about friendship."

Twilight looked visibly embarrassed, "Ok, maybe you are telling the truth, but even if you are, i doubt that i have any spells which could send you to a different dimension."

“That's fine, any chance of us getting home would be great!” replied Spirit in a dedicated tone.

“Just one thing I ask of you though.”

“Yes?”

“What is that thing strapped onto your back?” asked Twilight as she pointed to Spirits laptop bag.

“Complicated stuff, I’ll explain later, but for now, if you are going to search a scroll that highlights dimensional traveling, then it’s probably going to take a while, so, we’ll need a place to stay at.”

“Actually I could just ask Princess Celestia about the scroll.”

“Oh yea, okay, I guess this could be done within minutes, cool.”

“But for now you could stay at my tree house, if for some odd reason Celestia can’t find one.”

“I sure hope there is such thing as dimensional traveling in Equestria.”

“Yes, but before we do anything, don’t you think you should at least say bye to Pinkie Pie?”

Spirit and Shadow nodded in agreement, it wouldn't be fair to not say farewell to the pink pony that introduced them to Ponyville in the first place. The door to the gingerbread house opened, dubstep and dancing ponies filled the room, and Pinkie Pie could be seen at the back doing some break dance moves. The duo walked up to Pinkie, she seemed a bit too distracted by her dancing, the bros really wanted to leave though, everypony were giving them looks, it was really awkward when it came down to it. Pinkie Pie finally noticed the duo, she quickly stopped her dance moves and put her attention towards Spirit and Shadow.

“Oh hey Pinkie, just here to say bye, sorry, we got to go” exclaimed Shadow

“Awwwww, oh well, bye, oh you should at least have a slice of cake because I made it just for you!” replied Pinkie Pie.

Spirit and Shadow shrugged, why not, having a slice of cake isn’t that bad, besides, she had the reputation of making the best cakes in Ponyville. The duo wandered over to the table, and they took 1 slice of both of their cakes. Spirit’s cake was a vanilla based caked that had cream on the top, there was also jam mixed with the cream on the top. Shadows cake was a dark chocolate, with a creamy chocolate topping, both of the cake tasted absolutely delicious.

The bros exited Sugarcube corner, waving their hooves at Pinkie Pie, they both had a goal to return to Earth, however, Spirit had the idea that returning back to earth seems too good to be true. Spirit had believed in fate, and getting teleported to Equestria was his and Shadow’s fate.

“Hey dude.” exclaimed Spirit.

“What?” replied Shadow.

“Do you want to go home? Because I have basically been talking for you, and I have not actually heard your opinion on the matter, do you want to stay in Equestria?”

“As beautiful as it is, no, I can’t, I have lived on Earth for a long time, Earth is my home, I can't abandon it. ”

“Ah, good, just making sure.”

“If only life was as simple as Equestria.”

“What are you saying back there?” asked Twilight as she turned her head over to the duo.

“Nothing Twilight, nothing.” replied Shadow.

Chapter 3: Now you're thinking with portals!

The trio arrived at Twilight’s tree house, the wind was still brushing against them, Spirit was the first to go inside. Unstrapping his laptop bag from his back, he glances around the inside of the tree, it was nicely carved out. It must of taken years to carve out the tree, all the edges were done perfectly, it was as if Twilight built the home, only if she had the carving skills to do so.

“This is a nice house” exclaimed Spirit as he places his laptop bag on a nearby table.

Twilight puts a small smile on her face; Spirit could tell that she was slightly nervous. It was obvious that she was nervous because the bros know everything about Equestria, even though they didn’t know EVERYTHING. But with things considered, who wouldn’t be nervous about two guys who know your whole life story, that would be pretty scary. Twilight could be seen inside looking through her books, probably making sure that there is such spell in one of them.

“So, Twilight, how do you believe the Dimensional traveling spell works?” asked Spirit.

“I said earlier that there may not be such thing as a spell that makes you travel through dimensions” replied Twilight

“Yes, I know, but how would you believe it would work?”

Twilight stops for a second and brings a hoof to her chin, “Maybe it’s just like the teleportation spell, except you use a far much greater powerful form of magic, and the pony that is getting teleported can visualise where he or she wishes to go”

“Well my theory is that you place a gateway onto a surface, and then you pinpoint where you want the gateway to lead to, then once that is over with, you walk through the gateway”

“My theory is that you are a true nerd” exclaimed Shadow as he barges into the conversation.

Spirit gives a bland look at Shadow, “Like you would know something about dimensional travel..”

Shadow shrugs, he never given a shit about dimensional traveling, and theories of how to do so either.

“Well none of my books seem to have anything about taking you home, however, I believe that Princess Celestia may have a lead. Or even better, if she owns a scroll that contains the magic we need” exclaimed Twilight as she wanders upstairs.

Shadow and Spirit exchange glances, “Why the fuck didn’t she do that first?” asked Spirit

Shadow shrugged, “Pony logic”

It was shortly after woods when Twilight came downstairs with an oversized letter, Shadow glances over to her, she was quickly finishing off the letter as she got down.

“So what does it say Twi?” asked Shadow as he trots over to her.

Shadow could tell she wasn’t comfortable with being called Twi, maybe only her friends call her Twi.

“Weeeeell.. Here”

“Dear Princess Celestia

Today I have met two ponies, both male, one is a Pegasus, and the other is a Unicorn. They have informed me that they are from another dimension, and of which their world is populated by a species called ‘Humans’. They wish to go back to their world with my help, knowing my magical abilities, however I don’t have a spell that can do that. I am asking you if by any chance you have a scroll that can help these two go back home. Much would be appreciated by these two!

Your most faithful student: Twilight Sparkles”

Shadow looked at the side of himself only to see his bro, Spirit, reading the letter, he was a slower reader.

“So, where is Spike? Don’t you need him to send the letter?” asked Shadow.

“I left him at sugarcube corner, because I think he was enjoying the party, I trust him to come back here on his own”

“You fucking did What?” yelled out Spirit.

“Don’t worry, I can just teleport the letter to princess Celestia!” exclaimed Twilight as her horn starts to glow.

The scrolled up letter starts glowing in violet, within seconds the letter disappears, leaving nothing behind.

“Okay, so how long do you suppose it would take her to reply?” asked Spirit.

Twilight puts a hoof to her chin, thinking briefly of how long it would take, “I’d estimate about.. half an hour. If she had it, she would try and find it..”

Spirit sighs, he had to stay here LONGER, and he really didn’t want to stay here for a night, he just wanted to go home, live the life he once had.

“Well, since you’re going to leave soon, can you give me some information about ‘Humans’?” asked Twilight, her eyes looked like they were glowing.

Spirit sighs, “Shadow, be useful and explain to her about our lives..”

Shadow sighs and walks up to Twilight, “He’s pissed off, we should go to another room if you want to know about us” he whispered.

Twilight nods and leads Shadow upstairs into her room. Just like the show, her bed was on the platform above, grand windows that had the view of ponyville sat next to Twilight’s bed. On the lower platform her desk sits at the side, there was a half empty ink bottle. The feather that Twilight used when she wrote the letter hovered over to the desk and sat in the ink bottle. Twilight closes the door behind her, so no noise can escape from her room.

“Okay, you want to know about humans, shoot” exclaimed Shadow.

Twilight give Shadow a look, but her facial expression quickly goes back to the dedicated look she had.

“Okay, um, what do you Humans like to eat?”

The question startled Shadow, he had to tell her that they are Omnivores, but in the best context so Twilight won’t vomit.

“Okay, Humans are, well, Omnivores, so our diet is Meat and Plant. We can live without meat, but without meat, we won’t get as much goodness in our bodies. But aside from the diet, we eat some of the things you eat, we have Ice Cream, Chocolate, Cake, apples, oranges, so we eat SOME of the stuff that you eat. Humans don’t eat grass or flowers like you, however, we use sunflower seeds for medicine, I don’t know much about medical knowledge, if you want medical knowledge, ask Spirit.”

Surprisingly Twilight seemed very interested about the diet that humans have, she quickly jotted all the information on a notepad that was on her desk.

“Okay, umm, how about, umm, what does the magic do in your world?”

“Unfortunately Twilight, we don’t have magic, we use technology, like machines and gadgets. An example is a TV, or what other people call it, Tele Vision. A TV is big glass screen that shows animated films, and with sound, so if someone says something, the voice can be played out. It’s complicated, but, that is what a TV is, and we just watch TV for entertainment, even though Spirit doesn’t watch TV. But there is a heap of other stuff, but I can’t really explain them.”

Twilight puts a hoof to her chin to think of a question while she jots down the information.

“Twilight..”

Twilight lifted her head from the note book, already there was 2 pages full of information that she has written.

“How about I tell you some human history?”

That sure got her attention and she puts a huge grin across her face, and quickly nods yes. Shadow sat down as he was about to start telling Twilight the long journey from Dinosaurs, to the present.

Finally Shadow finished his history lesson with Twilight. It took him 2 hours to explain to her everything he knew about mankind. Twilight seemed vaguely interested in medieval times in japan, she found their culture beautiful. Thing that got Shadow is that Celestia still hasn’t replied to the letter, infact every now and then, he and Twilight would hear Spirit swear loudly.

“FUCK” a loud voice erupted from below

“Please excuse me Twilight” whispered Shadow as he got up to go downstairs.

He spotted Twilight’s curious facial expression on the way to the stairs, she didn’t know what he was going to do. As Shadow reaches downstairs, Spirit was staring at him, Spirit knew he came down for a reason. As shadow approaches Spirit, he could see slight amount of anger in his face, he really wanted to go home. Shadow was in talking range of Spirit, Spirit was waiting for Shadow to speak up, finally Shadow spoke up.

“I need to take a dump!” exclaimed the Pegasus as he wanders towards the toilet.

Spirit facehoofs, “Yea, whatever”

“I was just telling, you know, because I though you wanted to know about my pooping problem which I am about to fix”

“Shut up”

“No you”

“No, fuck you!”

“No you”

Spirit lets out a loud groan, he wasn’t in the mood to be playing the ‘Fuck you’ game. Shadow shrugged and entered the toilet, finally being able to empty his shit box. Shortly after he entered the toilet Twilight wandered downstairs, Spirit’s eyes followed Twilight’s figure going down the stairs, he wanted answers.

“Twilight, you said 2 hours ago that Celestia was supposed to give us that scroll, why hasn’t she replied yet?” asked Spirit with concern in his tone.

Twilight lets out a sigh, “Look, I’m sorry, but I don’t know, the princess might be busy with something, I don’t know. But can you do me a favour and stop yelling every so often with foal language!”

Spirit gave Twilight a look, “You don’t understand how badly I want to go home, just because Shadow is calm about it doesn’t mean that I am going to be calm about it. Think about it Twi, imagine one day you get teleported into our world in a human body, you wouldn’t last a single day!”

Twilight looks at Spirit in disappointment, “I am trying my best, I am trying to find every possible way to get you home. And all I simply ask of you is to calm down, but no, you had to change the subject about being in your shoes. LOOK, things are not going to change if you just sit there and swear!”

That pissed Spirit off, “You know what? Fuck you!”

Spirit got up and before he could turn around, he got slapped across the face. Shadow was in the background as he saw the bitch slap.

“Don’t you dare swear at me like that, and then you think you could just walk off. Stop crying over the fact that you have to stay here longer and Get Over Yourself!” yelled Twilight.

There was a long awkward silence, Twilight and Spirit glared at each other’s eyes, soon after Twilight marched upstairs.

“Okay, what the fuck is your problem?” asked Shadow.

Spirit sighed, he was quiet for a few seconds until he finally replied “I need some time to myself”

Spirit wandered off into the kitchen, as he did the front door opened, Spike finally came back home, at the wrong time too.

“Huh? Oh hey, what are you here for?” the small purple dragon asked.

Shadow lets out a deep sigh, he had to explain everything to the small dragon, Twilight is too angry to explain.

“Well, lets start from the beginning..” exclaimed Shadow.