Let's play some games with Leon, Luna, and Eddy

by Fireheart 1945

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Shining Armor, Human, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Princess Luna, Comedy
Length: 135786

Basically everyone seems to think of Luna as a gamer, so I added my own story about this.

Since the opening of the portal between Earth and Equestria, many human technologies have been passed down to the equine races.

Three friends, two humans and one very special pony, discover what it means to be friends under the guise of gaming.

Basicially a lot of stories have Luna as a gamer, so I will be adding in my own series on this theme.

Published 2012-10-17 08:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2022-07-27 23:22:05 UTC

World of Tanks, game 2; Cowards and traitors

World of Tanks, game 2; Cowards and traitors

Leon was glad to play again. It had been a few weeks or so, but he was more than glad to get together with Eddy and Luna again. The British line had come out, and he wanted to get into the action.

They met again at the time that they had agreed to in private messaging.

Eddy was the first to say something; "How'd that history test go, Leon?"

Leon smiled, even though they couldn't see one another. "Ace'd it, I think."

"Good job frenchie."

The smile disappeared. "For the last time, my last name is Berthier. That's Breton. BRE-TON. Not French."

"Whatever... frenchie."

"Troll."

"Your servant, sir." Leon could imagine him bowing in mock respect.

Before either of them could go any further, Luna said, with the authority of royalty, "Gentlemen. Let us return to the game and stop all this rambling."

"Fine."

"Whatever."

"I have not had a chance to try out the new line. We... er, I, would like to sample it", Luna continued.

"Took them long enough." Eddy, being British himself, was understandably upset about the delay in the arrival of his nation's tech tree.

They each chose a tank; Leon decided to use the Matilda. It was a medium tank with the gun and ammunition of an artillery piece; it was decent at engaging anything slow or non moving, and the arch of it's shell allowed for some... special shots.

He looked at the platoon list and saw that Luna had chosen a Medium I; the lowest medium tier tank of any in the game. It had it's perks, but it's size was often it's undoing more than anything; it couldn't hide where an FT-17 or MS-1 could.

Leon chose to abandon the Matilda and buy - for free, since tier 1 tanks were free - an FT-17 for himself, then he hit ready.

Eddy had decided on a Medium III. Leon facepalmed. He could at least have tried to stay in tier 1 or 2. The enemy tanks would be higher tier... unless MM (Matchmaker) screwed up again, which it typically did.

Eddy hit the start battle button, and the screen changed to the pre-battle format.

At least we don't get hit with a tank too low for the battle it's sent into. The battle was apparently to take place on Malinovka again.

The screen changed again; they had arrived on the battle site. Leon looked around. His team seemed okay, but the other side had an extra tier 3 tank... and a tier 3 artillery.

Great. Thanks a lot, Eddy. His own team had two BS's (which were bs, in Leon's opinion) and mostly tier 2 vehicles to stop three tier 3 tanks and 11 tier 2 tanks and tank destroyers.

Matchmaker, when i find you, I'm going to smash your face in and throw you out the window of a ten story building.

The timer got to zero before he could try to plan things out.

One Panzerjager on their team immediately set out for the water (they had started in the south).

Leon typed; "Where r u going pz?"

The answer; "MM screwed us over so I'm going to save myself from a repair bill." He proceeded to drown himself in the lake.

O rly? Leon drove over to the lake; two of his teammates were cussing out the suicider, threatening to report him. They were going to like what he was going to do...

He stopped short of the water and shot the traitor in the rear.

The drowned player cried, "WTF!?"

Leon shot him again, and continued until he had no health left. He then answered, "That's what you get for bailing on us. Enjoy your repair bill."

Several teammates typed "LOL!" "Haha got what was coming to him" "Try bailing again, I dare you!"

"WTF MM screwed us over we can't win you guys suck."

Leon had other pressing matters by now, however; a Panzer 2 was approaching in the swampy area that divided the map into east and west.

He shot at it, but his shot bounced of the front armor. Fortunately a BS landed a shot, and a another Panzerjager on ther team hammered it until it died.

Suddenly his tank was hit; there was a loud crumpling noise, and his crew cried out about damage done to the tank.

Gah! I have to be more careful!

He quickly checked his position and the minimap; a T-26 had opened fire from behind a bush, but by doing so had reduced it's camoflage and made itself visible. Leon reversed, then fired at the enemy tank twice. The first shot was a bounce, the second tracked the vehicle and effectively nailed it in place. The two BS' on his team combined fire to take it out.

With that out of the way, Leon chugged over to a bush that provided better cover, and began sniping at tanks that had been lit up by a Panzer II. He hit a couple and bounced one before they faded from view.

"Uh guys help right is gone."

Leon looked again at the minimap; indeed, the right was swarming with red dots, and the green dots opposing them were few.

He tried to hurry over, but the FT-17 was a slow tank on a good day, and it could hardly go any faster if it was chucked off a cliff. By the time he was in position to engage, two of the three tanks still defending the sector had been knocked out. He got behind a bush and hoped it would provide the necessary cover.

Another enemy Panzer II came charging down the hill. He shot at it, missed, groaned, and fired again, this time hittting the tracks. The enemy tank kept coming, although it clearly hadn't spotted him yet. Leon shot again, missing. The Panzer II, still moving, fired in his direction. Several shots flew over the french-made tank, but none bit. It must not have his exact location, then.

The Panzer II started taking fire from Leon's left, coming from back towards the green base. It was hit, then, to Leon's great surprise, it began burning. It died shortly thereafter, the fire consuming the vehicle.

Someone said "w00t" on the chat bar. Eddy. Sure enough, the Englishman began gloating shortly there afterwards.

"Did you see that!? He's burned down to a crisp. Anyone for breakfast?"

If the toast includes metal and shells, then count me out.

A red message came up from the other side of the screen.

"Aw, son of a fucking bitch!" Leon felt like laughing. Eddy's tank had been destroyed, and as usual, he was pissed off about it. "Stupid fucking artillery!"

"Edward, please!" Luna said, strain in her voice. "I did not come here to have the air around me be fouled by your swearing."

"Guys, we have bigger problems," Leon said, glancing at the top of the screen. The score was five to eight, and not in their favor. "Save your arguements for later, if you have any by then."

An artillery shell exploded next to his own tank, and he decided it was a better idea to find a better hiding place than to argue futilely with his companions. He drove away from the bush and moved a decent ways back to another one.

A Cruiser III came up from the swamp and began shooting green players with his own scaled down but still very devastating derp cannon; a T-26 died almost instantly.

Leon took careful aim... at the cannon of the enemy tank. He had little to no chance of killing the enemy tank outright, but if it couldn't fire or was, say, tracked, it would be all the easier for the rest of his team to take out. His first shot missed; the second was met by the phrase, "That one bounced!" Not very encouraging. He saw it's turret begin to turn in his direction.

Fuck.

Shells struck the Cruiser in the side. The turret turned.

Leon fired again, this time at the tracks. To his relief, he was able to obliterate it's right track. His relief was short-lived; the enemy player decided that he was the more dangerous target. The turret came back at him.

He ran for it. The shell plowed into the ground just inches from his tank; it must have been armor-piercing, as it did not cause any damage.

"Run for it, Leon, I'll cover you," Luna said. It had been her tank that had attacked the Cruiser.

"Thanks." Leon managed to dodge another shell, but an enemy arty had clearly decided to join in the fun; a high explosive projectile blew off his right track and took out half his health. To make things worse, the Cruiser hadn't given up on him, and came in as it fired on the move. It hit another allied player, one-shotting him, then brought it's attention back to the tracked FT-17.

Leon fired frantically in an effort to at least damage the enemy tank; four bounces and another hit on the Cruiser's tracks were his only reward.

The Cruiser took careful aim; another shot from Leon didn't do anything whatsoever.

This is it...

Two artillery shells struck the Cruiser almost at the same time. One of them must have hit the fuel tank, as the opposing vehicle began to burn. More shells, from other green tanks, began striking the tank. It succumbed to the concentrated fire and blew up.

Leon leaned back in his seat and let out a sigh. He glanced up at the score; 10:10. It had been three minutes from the point the Cruiser had launched it's attack, and his team had managed to recover somewhat. Unfortunately the score did not include the quitter who had tried to drown himself, so the teams were still 11:10 rather than being completely equal.

A red bar appeared in the upper section of the screen; someone was capping their base.

Great.

He turned into the direction of the allied base and began the long chug; the Ft-17 hadn't been built for speed. The red bar filled rapidly. Two other players who tried to stop the cap were killed by artillery fire and by the capper's own gun.

Before long, the bar had filled completely; the words "Base captured" appeared on the screen.

Damn it! "Next time choose a more appropriate tank for the tier, Eddy," Leon said grumpily.

"I'm not going to cripple my experience and time by using a tier 1 or 3, unless I want to."

"Ass."

"Fuck you."

Leon angrily got off the game, threw off his headset, and walked out of the room.

World of Tanks, game 3; Special guest Twilight Sparkle

World of Tanks, game 3; Special guest Twilight Sparkle

Another day at school done, Leon got on his computer, entered his World of Tanks password, and was on his account on the double quick. He, Luna, and Eddy were supposed to play a lot of games today, aiming for as high an amount of credits and experience as they could get.

He waited and waited, but for a while, neither of the other two players came on the game. After thirty minutes, he got sick of waiting.

Come on, where are you guys?

Suddenly, he heard a beeping sound as someone connected to the system...

"Hey Eddy, Luna..."

"Sorry, Leo," came the regal voice on the other end of the connection, "Edward is too sick to play today."

"Aw, nuts." Leon slumped back in his chair.

"Do not fear," Luna continued, for we - er, I - have brought someone else to join the fun."

"Oh?" He sat back up. "Who?"

"Uh, hello? is this thing on?" asked a familiar, scholarly voice.

"That wouldn't be Twilight Sparkle, would it?"

He could almost imagine the Princess smiling. "Yes, she has joined us today. She needed a break from her studies, and I convinced her to install World of Tanks and Minecraft. By the way, do you know who built a wall of bedrock around me the other day while I was... otherwise engaged?"

"You mean afk." Leon thought about that. "It wasn't me; builders can't get bedrock. Must have been an admin."

"Hello?" Twilight asked again, "Can you hear me?"

"Yes, I can hear you," Leon answered. "Sorry about that."

"It's ok. Now, I've completed the tutorial and used some gold to buy some higher tanks than I would have had, but I'm not too familiar with them."

"Wallet warrior," Leon muttered.

"What?"

"He means someone who uses money to advance through the game or has a premium account," Luna supplied.

"Oh, I see."

"Here, sending an invite to a platoon," Leon said as he did just that.

"Got it."

"Me too."

The platoon tab turned up with Twilight's username (TwilightSparkle123); seconds later, Luna joined.

"Okay, so we have a Panzer IV, a Matilda, and... a KV-1?" Leon noted. "Uh, Princess, you realize the Soviets hated monarchy, right?"

"Yes, unfortunately." There was genuine regret in her voice. "I've read about that. Worst thing that I could immediately imagine befalling a royal family, being wiped out like that."

"Are you talking about the Russian Revolution?" Twilight asked excitedly, "because I bought some books a few days ago..."

"I think we should focus on the game," Leon interrupted. "Sorry, but aren't you on break from your studies?"

"Sorry. The urge to learn and share knowledge and all that."

"Not at all; I share that feeling quite often."

"Can we get to playing the game?" Luna asked.

"Uh, sure. Hitting the button." Leon clicked the "Battle!" button, and the screen changed. The map was Arctic Circle.

"Ugh..." Leon slammed his fist on the table upon seeing the players and their tanks. "Not another fucking loltractor?"

"Leon!" Twilight shouted.

"Wait, Leon, it's on the other side," the Princess noted.

"Oh, really?" Leon looked more carefully. "Yep. I bet his team's gonna blow him to shreds themselves. Happens half the time."

"Why would anyone kill their teammate?"

"Because, Twilight, the loltractor..."

"The what?"

"The nickname for the Leichtractor. Anyway, it's a tier one tank. It's a tin can, a tutorial tank more than anything. and the only way to bring it to a tier five match is if either the matchmaker gets drunk, or, more likely to the point of certainty, it platoons with someone else."

"I still don't see the problem."

"The problem is that it's a joke at the expense of the players on that team. The loltractor can't do much more than bounce shots off of opposing tanks, while those same other tanks can blow it up in a single shot. And anyone who plays this game should know that."

"Well, it doesn't excuse blowing up your own teammate. You'll get banned for that."

"Only if you break the rules repeatedly in a short amount of time. And some people could care less; this is a game, after all."

The screen switched, and the timer began counting down.

"Damn loltractor," someone on the other team said in all chat.

"I feel sorry 4 u guys," someone on Leon's team said back.

"Maybe he's just new?" Twilight asked on the chat.

"Hey Twilight," Leon asked over the headset, "how can you type with hooves? it's not like you can feel the keys you hit, and your hooves are so hard they'd probably break the keyboard if you tried. And they can't be used for a mouse."

"Well, for one thing, we ponies can use an alternate keyboard with bigger keys as well as a bigger mouse. Also, unicorns and alicorns can use magic for regular keyboards, like the one I'm using."

"Okay, thanks."

"No problem."

"Let's go!" the in-game voice announced' the timer had reached zero.

"Aw nuts!" Leon said again, this time in exclamation. He reached for his mouse, hit the "w" key, and began rolling out.

Sure enough, a green message showed up on the right, above the minimap; Funcee (M4) destroyed ally 4tehlolsevil. Leon laughed, hard; he was laughing so hard he didn't look where he was going and rammed a large rock. Fortunately, you didn't normally take damage from hitting parts of the map, but he forced himself to stop laughing when he realized he'd almost plunged off a cliff. He'd done that more than once before. Usually, someone ended up laughing at him for doing so.

He reversed and headed north, trying to hide behind rocks and in shallow areas. The northern-central area of the map was more fluid than the south, which usually wound up being a contest of who had the better tanks and who ran out of patience the fastest; there was a narrow cliff area with a turn upwards into the enemy base, and, naturally, the hillside and rocks provided cover for both sides.

A shell exploded just behind him. He turned to the right and drove behind a rock, out of harm's way for now. He turned the tank around; just as he did, the enemy who had shot at him was revealed; it was a Churchill I. It wasn't as heavily armored as the KV (or so Leon thought), but it's quick-firing 57mm gun could chew up other tanks like it was no one's business.

He peered out from his hiding spot and lined up a quick shot. The shell struck the tracks and penetrated, although it did little actual damage and the track didn't break. Luckily for him, the other player was focused on another target (or had just decided to ignore the hit) and fired on it. That gave him another free shot; a 75mm shell slammed into the side of the Churchill. This time, the damage was substantial; the enemy backed off and began looking for a place to hide. He didn't find one, as an artillery shell busted his track, and once that happened, he didn't last long before blowing up.

A loud explosion and shower of dust alerted Leon to the presence of the eye of an enemy artillery player; his hiding spot wasn't safe anymore. He wasted no time in abandoning the site. A moment later, an artillery piece on the other side exploded. Whether it was the one that had just fired on him or not, he couldn't tell; there was more than one arty on the opposing team. Regardless, that enemy player was out of the fight.

Another shell, this one clearly fired by an enemy tank, struck his side as he raced to find a better place to hole up. His track broke instantly and he skewed a little before coming to a complete stop.

Aw shi - Before he could complete the thought, loud roar blasted forth from his speakers, and a shell arced past him, blasting the tank that had hit him. The enemy vehicle exploded. A KV-1 with a smoking 152mm gun stood just behind him.

"Thanks, Luna, I owe you one."

"My pleasure, now get that track fixed and get back in the fight."

"Yep." Leon clicked on the repair kit he had in stock, clicked on the track icon, and just like that, the track was repaired. He immediately took off, managing to get up the hill to the north.

By now, the red team's base was in sight. There stood the remaining artillery unit. He shot at it, but two other people fired as well, and one of them got the kill. Leon forced himself to shrug. He was ticked off he hadn't got the kill, but at least he'd gotten some damage in. Now it was only a matter of capping the base.

He drove into the circle around the flag, and sure enough a timer began to count down. While it did, he checked the list of players. The score was 7-5 in his team's favor. That was good, but he'd seen other matches where the losing team had pulled a rabbit out of their hat.

They tried to this time. A Ram-II chugged up from the southern ridge, opening fire on those trying to capture the flag. One player, in a Cruiser III, hadn't a ghost of a chance; he was hit and blew up before he could do anything to counter the enemy. Turning to the newcomer, Leon turned and fired. Unfortunately, his shot bounced off the target.

The Ram's turret turned toward him. An artillery round landed next to it, but did nothing other than shower it in digital soil and rock. Leon fired again. This time, the round broke through the side armor and broke the monster's track. That didn't stop it from pumping a round into him. Unlike the two rounds he'd thrown at it, the one shot the Ram fired reduced his health by one-fourth.

Another shot, this from Leon's right, hit the Ram from it's left.

"Don't worry Leon! I'll save you!"

"Twilight, no!"

The Ram-II turned again, this time toward Twilight's Matilda, and blasted it to smithereens with a single shot. Leon heard a loud clop from his headset.

"THE POWER OF THE MOON SHALL RAIN DOWN UPON THEE, EVIL BRUTE!" With that, Luna blasted the offending vehicle, reducing it's health by one-third.

"Luna, that kinda hurt my ears."

"Oh, sorry," came the answer, and the Princess really did sound sorry.

"It's fine, now let's get that monster."

They both kept shooting the Ram. Other tanks joined in. After it's first few seconds of success, the Ram had no chance. It was scrap metal before Leon knew it.

"Yes! We claim ownership of you!"

Leon didn't bother correcting her. The match was over not long after that without further incident.

"Well, that was a fun game," Twilight said. "Wanna go again?"

"OORAH!"

"The fun shall be doubled!"

Leon didn't know why, but he was sure all three of them were smiling as they joined the next battle.

Minecraft admin, Game 1

Leon turned on his computer, putting his headset on. He was all too eager for yet another day of fun.

"Good afternoon, Leon," came the Princess' voice.

"Afternoon, Luna. Ready for another round of playing admin?"

"Oh yes. I hope Edward joins in."

"He said he would. He should be along in a little while."

"Well, okay, then, lets log in."

"'Kay."

Leon clicked on one of the icons on his screen, one for a very popular game.

Minecraft.

He'd gotten the game a while ago, and on the server he had joined he had done pretty well for himself, enough so that the Owner of the server had asked him to become an admin, and he, along with Luna, had said yes. Of course, part of the reason was because the staff for the server had been quite short at the time, and needed the extra back up. In fact, staff was still quite a bit short.

Which was why Leon had to be on full alert. He and Luna hadn't gotten to be admins because of carelessness; as in every game, there were people willing to cheat, lie, and do other devious things.

Right now, Leon was walking through a strip mine. It looked like a regular mineshaft... until he came to a point where someone had suddenly branched off for no apparent reason. He followed the trail, logblock in hand, and, at the end of the shaft, checked the area; sure enough, someone had found diamonds here. And the only way they could have seen it...

Yep, x-ray. In real life, Leon shook his head. Why people would cheat at a game that had no real bearing on outside life was beyond him. In Minecraft, x-ray was a mod that allowed the user to see through blocks (usually stone) in order to find valuable ores, in this case diamond. This needed looking into at once.

05-07 15:16:20; GildaTheWarrior destroyed block diamond_ore. That was what the logblock told him. He wondered who exactly that was, but it sounded familiar.

He hit the command; /tp GildaTheWarrior.

He was immediately warped to a tunnel under the earth, and he needed only a moment to realize what was going on.

A figure with a Griffon shape was breaking redstone that lead to several switches, which Leon recognized as belonging to the PVP arena he'd helped build and modify. Since contact with Equestria and the neighboring countries of it, pony and Griffon skins had become available in the game. Pony, zebra, and Griffon skins, unlike all the others, were four-legged; they looked the same as their counterparts in Equestria, except, of course, for the fact that they were blocky, just like everything else in the game.

Well if this is who I think it is, I'm going to have some fun. He typed /back, and was warped back to the point where he had found the x-ray evidence. There was a lava pit close by.

He typed /put GildaTheWarrior.

Instantly a flailing Griffon was set into the lava; the tit tit tit sound, reserved for when a player was receiving damage, went crazy. In seconds, the Griffon stopped moving altogether, then vanished. The words GildaTheWarrior tried to swim in lava came up on chat.

"WTF!?"

Another person, or Griffon, rather, that thinks they're entitled to whatever they want. Leon sighed.

"So..." he typed. "Griefing the arena?"

"No. Not me."

"Yes, you. Explain."

"I'm telling."

Ignoring that, Leon typed, "You realize I was vanished and watching you rip up the redstone under the arena, right?"

"You got it all wrong."

"No I don't. I saw you with my own eyes."

"Oh, did you catch someone?" Luna asked over the headset.

"Yep." In the game, he warped to the arena, where several players, including a certain RainbowDash789, the account that actually belonged to the famous pegasus, were engaged in combat; the pony model was as good as the humanoid skins that she battled alongside.

/put GildaTheWarrior. Ch g. /vanish. By typing this, he put himself in global chat, as well as bringing the errant Griffon in front of him and becoming visible. This time, she was devoid of the diamond armor she had worn.

"Griefing player and admin-made structures in against the rules," he typed.

Everyone in the arena stopped fighting within seconds.

"Also," he added, "what about your x-ray?"

No one typed or said anything for several seconds.

"Not me."

"Yes, you," Leon repeated. "Explain it, in front of everyone. Now."

"Gilda," Rainbow typed, "Why?"

"I have no idea what he's talking about; I was just mining and he put me in lava for no reason."

"Yes, you were mining... mining redstone that had been placed under the arena to operate machinery. And that's not the only problem."

Again, there was an uncomfortable silence, except for the music in the background.

"I found evidence you x-rayed using logblock... and common sense."

"Your a liar."

"It's you're. And no I am not. You dug straight to diamond. And it wasn't just in the place where I put you in lava. I found evidence of it earlier, in a mineshaft you dug straight down, then tried to cover up with cobblestone."

"I need to see where your talking about."

"No you don't. I'm just giving you a chance to admit to it. It's been proven beyond any doubt."

Silence.

"You realize you broke the rules in more than one instance, both offenses of which are bannable, then lied about it."

Leon went into the creative menu, put a lava bucket in his inventory, then closed the creative window.

"One last time. You x-rayed and griefed the arena; this is not a question."

After several seconds, the answer came back; "No. You suck. You're lame, and this whole server and everyone on it is lame!"

"Not as lame as your character will be." With that, Leon got out a lava bucket and poured it over her head. Gilda didn't last very long before the message that she had tried to swim in lava came up again. Leon then toggled his fly abilities on, flew up, typed /bring GildaTheWarrior, and watched as Gilda was immediately teleported a hundred feet into the air only to fall to the ground and die again.

He teleported to her after she had respawned, and hit /spawnmob skeleton 10. Ten skeletons immediately came into being and shot at Gilda; the only problem was, half of them had hit other skeletons, who turned around and shot back, starting a ridiculously big fight between the mobs.

"Oops. Hold on, I meant to do this." /spawnmob creeper 20

Twenty creepers spawned, saw their target, and blew up seconds later, incidentally killing all the battling skeletons along with Gilda.

Having had his fun, Leon typed /ban GildaThe Warrior - xray, griefing, lied - also horrible temper and attitude, and was gratified to see his words repeated at once in the chat screen.

"Sorry Leon," Rainbow said in chat, "I thought she really had changed."

"Don't be," he replied, "It wasn't your fault. Now, who's ready for spleef?"

A few hours later, the event over, Leon was again looking for potential cheaters. And again, he came upon a tunnel that looked suspicious.

Some people never learn, he thought to himself. Now, what does logblock say... oh... DiamondTiarais1337. Well, that couldn't be a coincidence.

He checked to see if that player - and he had a good idea who it really was - was on. As a matter of fact, she was.

Leon made himself invisible, then teleported over to her.

A Diamond Tiara model was in an underground base, looking into chests; no doubt she was stealing whatever had been placed there.

Not good. Obviously, blowing her up wasn't an option, not here in someone else's base, and lava would destroy the items she'd stolen.

So he typed /kill DiamondTiarais1337, and watched as her character suddenly stopped moving and died, vanishing and leaving the stolen goods on the ground.

Let's see; some diamonds, some diamond armor, three diamond swords, and three emeralds, probably stolen from the chest. That was really impressive, not even counting the rest of the loot.

"Hey, who was stealing from my chest?" someone typed.

Turning around, he wasn't surprised to see an Applebloom model looking into the chest, with the intriguing name Applebloomflower777 over her head.

"I'll explain in a minute," Leon typed. He then teleported to Diamond Tiara.

The young pony player was standing still; obviously she was still in shock over what had just happened and was trying to figure it out.

"So..." he typed. "About that x-ray you have..."

"Who said that? Where are you?"

"Oh really?" Luna asked over the headset, "another one?"

"Yep. And she was stealing from one of your own subjects."

"Oh, well, that won't do. Hold on, I have the perfect solution..." He heard her giggle a little.

Back in the game, Leon made himself visible.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"Lol. So, let's talk about the x-ray you've been using... and about using chest finder."

After about fifteen seconds, the response came; "no."

"Yes."

"I didn't do it."

Really? I see you do it with my own eyes and you deny it? "Yes you did. You realize of course that I saw you do it, don't you?"

"She stole my stuff."

"Nope. I've been in your tunnels; obvious x-ray. And the big hole in the wall you used to enter the room shows signs of chest finder..."

"What's chest finder?"

"You would know. It's like x-ray, but with chests."

"No."

"For the last time, yes."

"Let me go back through my own tunnels; I'll prove it."

"It's already been proven. You x-rayed. And you used it to steal from another player's base."

Diamond Tiara didn't answer.

"I assume you read the rules..."

"Uh, sure?"

"Tell me, what does it say about hacking?"

"Well..." There was no reply for twenty seconds.

"Yep. Thought so. You didn't even read the rules. The rules clearly state that anyone who gets caught hacking will be banned. I'm just giving you a chance to admit to it and have a small chance at an appeal for an unban. Last chance."

"Not me."

"Sigh." Over the headset, Leon asked, "Is it set up yet, Princess?"

"Yes. Hold on." Suddenly Diamond Tiara disappeared.

"Hey, what the..." Leon was interrupted when his character was teleported away.

Walls of obsidian were the first thing he noticed, sparsely lit by torches. The ceiling was covered with cobwebs, and iron bars were before him, with Diamond Tiara being behind them.

"Your obsidian castle?" he asked Luna.

"Yes. Do you like it? We... er, I, put a lot of work into it."

"Yeah, it's awesome!"

"Thank you." In chat, the Princess typed, "AND NOW FOR YOU, OUR UNFAITHFUL SUBJECT!"

"Wait. Ur the Princess."

"WE ARE!!!"

"Pleaz don ban me; he's aliar!"

"HOW DARE YOU LIE IN OUR AUGUST PRESENCE! WE KNOW OF YOUR UNFAIR TREATMENT OF YOUR PEERS!"

"Also, she was stealing from Applebloom," Leon added verbally.

"She'll pay for that," the Princess answered via headset. In chat, she typed, "YOU SHALL FACE PUNISHMENT FOR YOUR CRIMES!"

"Wut r u going to do?"

"IT IS THE LABYRINTH FOR YOU!"

Diamond Tiara was teleported away, and Leon was too after a few more seconds.

They were inside a giant room. On the floor, with walls five blocks high, was an enormous maze. The school bully had been placed in one corner; Leon and Luna were floating above it.

"I think I know what you have planned," Leon said.

"I hope so; we've been friends for many months."

Leon typed, "You have one minute to get to the center of the maze. If you do, you go free. If you fail to complete the maze in the time allotted, or you die, you'll be banned for x-ray."

"But I didn't."

"Starting now."

As Diamond Tiara set off reluctantly, he said to Luna, "I seriously hope you know what you're doing. If she somehow gets through this..."

"Oh, she won't. If you notice, the maze, as well as being full of traps, is impossible to complete. The center is walled off, and the blocks are protected, so she won't be able to break any of them."

"Ah. Nice."

"I certainly think so."

"Hey guys, what's up?" asked a British voices on the headset.

"Hey Eddy. You're just in time to see us mess with another x-rayer."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, just tp to me."

Eddy's character (a creeper in a suit) came into view a few seconds later. "Ah, this."

"Oh, this is going to be good," Luna giggled. "She's almost reached the hidden lava pit."

Diamond Tiara had reached a dead end with a switch on the wall. When she hit it, the sand blocks underneath her gave way. Leon hoped he would see the "insert-player-name-here tried to swim in lava" message, but that didn't happen.

"Oh, wait. That wasn't the lava pit," Luna realized. "It was the pit filled with dynamite!"

"Oh-ho, awesome!"

The chat abruptly said, DiamondTiarais1337 blew up. All three of them laughed themselves silly.

"Alright, no more fooling around," said Luna. "I'll ban this one."

"NO! DON"T BAN ME!!!!!!!!!!!!"

DiamondTiarais1337 was banned [x-ray, stealing, lied - I don't know what your tiara is made of, but it's not diamonds. Leon and Eddy again laughed at the witty ban reason.

"Well guys, it's been fun. How about a PVP race just for fun?"

"Oh yeah!"

"The fun shall be doubled... in SPEED!"

Note; I realize some of you might be a bit disconcerted that this chapter has Minecraft rather than World of Tanks as the game being played. The reasons for this are simple; I am a little bored of World of Tanks, and more than a little tired of the bs Wargaming throws out against players like Millbarge and anyone else who dares to question them. As well, other games have caught my interest, namely Crusader Kings 2, Minecraft, SimCity 2013, Halo Wars, and others.

As such, I'm open to suggestions for the renaming off this story, one still with all three names in it. Again, Wargaming has lost my interest for following the example of the Soviet Union and it's system in banning and silencing people who try to oppose them, and for their hypocritical policies (not caring about griefers and teamkillers, but worrying about every little thing being said on the forums). I may regain interest eventually, especially after World of Battleships comes online, but for now I'm taking a break from World of Tanks.

As for those waiting for more Robotech, please know that I am currently really torn up on whether to continue the story as it is or to edit the more most recent chapter (Enter Khyron) to have the ponies taken more actions and basically rewrite the whole "Sara Base on Mareis" thing to something more realistic, so it will be a little while. I'm not saying it'll be forever, it'll just be a few weeks before a new chapter is put in place (school is also part of the problem :/).

Finally, much of this chapter was inspired by Vertith (a Minecraft admin who posted many punishments of hackers on Youtube) and gtwy (Another admin, known for his catching professional griefer videos).

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 1)

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 1)

Leon sat down, turned on his computer, and waited for his friends to join their channel. Once they did, he joined a game he was very excited about playing, and had been excited to play for weeks.

"Well, mates, this is it," Eddy announced over the headset.

"Yeah," Leon replied. "Vicky 2."

"Technically it's 'Victoria 2,'" Luna interrupted.

"Really? Are we going to start out arguing over the name?" Leon asked, a little frustrated.

"If we could see one another on camera, Leon, you'd know I was joking."

"Ahhh." As he was contemplating that, the screen lit up with the map of the world, and all the nations on the face of the planet in 1836. "Well, I call dibs on Texas."

"Figures," Eddy said disdainfully," You always did like the underdogs."

"And the fact that I have a massive bonus for immigration has nothing to do with it?"

"If you even get to use it. Mexico'll squish you like a bug, mate."

"Whatever. I still choose Texas."

"Fine. Your loss, man."

"Well who are you playing as, Ed?"

"I'm playing as Denmark or Dai Viet; probably Denmark. What about you, Princess?"

"I shall play as the unstoppable juggernaut known as Cathay!"

"What?"

"She means China," Leon translated. "Cathay is an archaic name for China."

"How am I supposed to know that? I'm not a history-loving egghead, Frenchie."

Leon didn't say what he was thinking out loud. Instead, he simply said, "We still have a couple of people to wait for."

"Um, hello? Is this thing working?" came a very shy, quiet voice. "Sorry if I was too loud."

Oh. "Is that who I think it is?"

"Yes. We... er, I, invited Fluttershy to play," Luna answered, "she has been giving me much counseling when I have felt... alone."

"Well, you definitely are not alone right now," Leon remarked.

"I know," the Princess said in a joyful and grateful voice.

"Who is the other bloke that's coming?" Ed asked.

"Leeroy Jenkins."

"WHAT!"

"HUH?"

"Just kidding," Luna giggled. "That would have been great, but I was unfortunately unable to contact him."

"Well, who is coming?"

"Just a certain Captain of the Royal Guard."

"Oh wow, really?"

"Yes, really."

"Hold on, isn't he Prince of the Crystal Empire? How is he still Captain of the Royal Guard?"

"Well, actually," Luna began, sounding unsure of how to continue, "It's one of those strange political situations. He does help Princess Cadence rule the Empire, but he still leads the Royal Guard. The Empire's independence itself is still being debated, considering that it's current rulers are both of a foreign dynasty."

"That must come up every now and again..."

"Can we just start the damn game?" Eddy interrupted.

"Well excuuuuuusssse me," Leon and Luna both replied. "Just trying to hold a conversation." Leon added.

"Just hold on, he's signing on right now," Luna put in.

"Hey everypony, what's up?" came the Prince's voice.

"Not much, and two of us aren't ponies," Leon deadpanned.

He got a laugh in return. "So who's playing what?"

"I'm playing as Texas, Luna's going for China, and Eddy's Denmark."

"That's cool. I'll go for Japan."

Fluttershy said quietly, "Um, I guess I'll play as Hawaii."

Leon pulled back a little in surprise. Eddy was the only one rude enough to snicker out loud, but he at least had the grace to turn off his mic in the middle of it.

"What's wrong?"

"Uh, Hawaii is an island nation, one without a strong army or all that many resources."

"Oh, that's okay. I'm not out to conquer the world. I just want to have fun."

Leon wondered how that would be possible, but he decided it wasn't his worry. If someone wanted to waste their time on a country that would never become anything, they could. In the meantime, he would do his best to withstand Mexico.

"Okay, is everyone ready?" Luna asked; she was the host for the game, and as thus had control over when the game would start, as well as the game speed once it had started. When she had gotten affirmative replies from everyone involved, she added, "Okay, starting... now!"

The image on the monitor changed to a loading screen; it took a little while to load, and then, finally, the game map came up.

Okay, let's see... I start out at war with Mexico, I have the worst economy I can imagine, and I have a tiny army. That last wasn't going to be the problem; from previous playthroughs, he knew that Sam Houston was the best defensive general that the game produced. The real trouble was in keeping the Texan army supplied, and getting the U.S. the join the war on his side.

"Hey, does anyone want an alliance?" he asked.

"Nah, sorry mate, I'm too far away and my army is terrible," Eddy responded unhelpfully.

"I'm uncivilized."

"So am I."

"I'm so sorry, but I just don't have the resources to help you, Leon."

"Da...arn it." He was on his own.

Leon did what he could. He made sure the taxes and tariffs were as high as he could set them, set the national stockpile to somewhere it would hopefully help him, and he ordered his army to move to Laredo; acting aggressive early might help him earn just enough war score to add "Acquire Mexican Texas" to the war goals he had, which was currently just to gain independence. He also began researching muzzle-loading rifles. He felt the urge to sing come upon him.

"Indian scouts with squirrel guns

Men with muzzleloaders

Stood together, heel and toe

To defend the Alamo."*

"Cut it out, Leo," Eddy said loudly after the former had burst into song.

"Sor-ree," Leon snapped back. When I get done with Mexico, you're next.

"Is everyone ready for the time to start going?" Luna asked. "Speed one?"

The answers were all affirmative. One the screen, the date started moving.

He got an event at once that informed him that Texas had acquired small arms, artillery, and money captured from Mexican garrisons. Leon watched as two Mexican armies entered his land and began immediately besieging territories. His own army arrived in Laredo and started doing the same.

So far, things were going as he had expected. What was not expected was the smaller of the two Mexican armies suddenly pealing off it's siege and start heading for his army.

Oh, Houston, I hope you know what you're doing.

The enemy army slammed into his and began the battle. Luckily, it looked like the Texan army was well supplied, and that Houston actually knew his business; the Mexican army started taking massive casualties at once. The suffered badly throughout the entire battle, and when it was over the Texan army was the one that still held it's ground. The battered Mexican army pulled back, morale shattered. Leon briefly considered following it in order to ensure it's destruction, then decided against it; Houston was a master of defense, but his bonus there didn't extend to offensive combat. The enemy army withdrew into Mexico.

The army lead by Santa Anna captured Antonio, but Leon's own army captured Laredo a few days later, so it wasn't a big loss. The Mexicans began heading for the city of Austin, the Texan capital.

"Hey Leon," Eddy asked, "how's the war going?"

"It's going well, no thanks to you."

"Oh, come on, mate, don't be like that."

"You don't have the entire military of Mexico to deal with."

"Yeah, but I do have to worry about what Prussia's going to do; they get insanely powerful as the game goes on."

"They aren't at war with you right now."

"True, but who knows how long that'll last?"

Deciding to give up on the idea of an alliance, Leon turned back to the war. His army had gone after the remaining region of Mexican Texas and was busily besieging it. The Mexican army he had beaten was currently reinforcing, while Austin was still under siege. Before long, the territory he was besieging fell, and he sent his army up north again. Now all he needed to do was wait for the U.S. to join before adding the war goal; if he did it now, the U.S. couldn't join the war, and he'd almost certainly lose.

Austin fell, and within thirty seconds (about ten or fifteen days or so in-game time) the U.S. declared war on Mexico. Leon instant went to his politics page and added the goal to take Mexican Texas.

Before long, American armies had begun to roll into Mexico, attacking Mexican forces and besieging provinces. Leon sent his own army to retake Austin; Santa Anna had left to fight an American army (and was currently losing).

Luna commented, "Looks like you'll have your independence soon enough, Leon."

"Thanks. Once the U.S. joins, it's easy enough."

In the game, a private message sent by Luna added, "What do you intend to do next?"

"Colonize Oklahoma," he replied in the same fashion.

"So soon?"

"Yes, I need to get it before the U.S. does. Otherwise I'll have to do something like capture Haiti, and they're protected by the U.S. most of thee time." After read what he had typed, he added, "lol *the."

"LOL."

In the meantime, Mexico decided it couldn't take anymore and gave in the U.S. peace offer, which gave Texas it's independence and gave him Mexican Texas. With that under his belt, he could breathe easy.

"Oh wow, you actually won," Eddy said with some surprise.

"Well, more accurately, the U.S.A. won, but details, details." With that, Leon clicked on Oklahoma and set a priority to colonize there. He split off his cavalry unit (named "Travis' Command") to one of the regions there, as it would help the colony finish faster.

"YES! WE HAVE SHATTERED KOREA!"

Leon grabbed at his ears, while protests began singing out over the headset.

"Oops, sorry," Luna apologized.

Leon moved the camera so that it focused on Korea; all of the northern states there had indeed been conquered by Luna's China.

"Uh, Princess?"

"Yes?"

"You do realize that your infamy level is probably through the roof right now, right?"

"Oh, so that's why Russia won't accept my offer for an alliance. That... was unexpected."

"I'll accept it," Shining Armor said. "Just agree to let me have the other half of Korea."

"Done," Luna replied at once. Within moments, Japan had declared war on Korea.

Leon sent a message to Luna; "I'll take an alliance if you want to give it to me."

"Yes," came the reply, "though I'm not sure how you'll be able to get over here in the event of a war."

"Simple," Leon typed, "beat up Mexico some more." A few seconds later, he got the alliance offer from China, which he accepted immediately.

"Hey," Shining typed, "want an alliance from me?"

"Yep." When he got the offer from Japan, he accepted it without a blink.

"Hey, mate, I can see what you're doing," Eddy injected.

"Well," Leon said, hitting the button to justify a war on Denmark as he did so, "it's good to make alliances. You never know when you'll need them," he finished, clicking on the "acquire state" casus belli.

"Well, I have Prussia, Britain, and France to worry 'bout... oh, and Sweden, they want to conquer the hell out of me."

"Well, good luck there."

"Uh, guys," Fluttershy quipped quietly, "I just got put in the U.S.A.s' sphere of influence. What does that mean?"

"They'll be asking you for an alliance," Luna answered, "and they'll protect you from other powers that might seek to declare war on you. It will make westernizing easier, I think, but it will set you back in so far as becoming a Great Power or anything like that."

"Can I leave their sphere?"

"Yes," Leon answered, "but that's going to be hard; you'll need a rebellion of reactionaries, I think, and they'll set back every political reform you made. The only thing that would really work is if someone like the U.K. or France started influencing you."

"Oh, well, uh, ok, I guess I'll just have to grin and bear it then."

In the meantime, Leon did what he could to get a bigger and better army; he decided to skimp out on the navy for now and focus on infantry and artillery, although he was willing to throw in a few cavalry as well. For that, though, he needed to encourage soldiers in Texas, and for that he needed a much bigger population. Luckily, as an American nation, he was getting immigrants at an insane rate whenever he encouraged immigration, so that part wasn't the problem. The trouble was the fact that he currently had only one national focus, which was being used to colonize Oklahoma.

Oklahoma didn't take all that long to finish, though, and before long it was a colony under the Texan banner; for some reason there had been no competition from the U.S., so he guessed that they were busy colonizing somewhere else, probably Africa. After that, he encouraged immigration in Texas proper. He began recruiting an infantry unit in Austin, which would bring his army to the grand maximum of four brigades. That fortunately didn't take too long, though it did strain his minuscule economy, or what passed for it.

As for what was actually news in the rest of the world, various German states began declaring bankruptcy, Britain started killing anything in India that was not under their direct domain, and Greece kept starting crises in order to liberate territory from the Ottoman Empire. After Shining Armor annexed Korea, a Korean independence movement kept trying to start a crisis there, but each time the world just chose to ignore it.

"What the hell mate?" Eddy shouted; Leon's casus belli on him had just finished.

"That's what you get for hating on my singing; now you have to be nice to me."

"Really? Really? I tell you to knock it off for the sake of everyone and you go and make a casus belli against me?"

"Yes, really."

"Oh, come on..."

While Eddy was raging at the world (he turned of his mic at some point as he was talking; apparently he was swearing and cursing everyone), Leon fashioned another casus belli on Mexico. Now that he had had time to think on it, a casus belli on Denmark wasn't the smartest idea he'd ever had. Another war with Mexico was a much better idea. He was aiming for New Mexico and Arizona this time around, and he wanted to take California after that if it was possible, giving him a direct line to the Pacific Ocean. Nevada-Utah was too much to hope for; the U.S. would certainly seize that very soon, not to mention the Deseret Nationalists that loved to rebel there. All in all, it would give him a modest amount of territory, population, and an ability to conquer and colonize from two coasts. If the U.S. took California before he could get at it, he'd go for Baja California.

"Come on, come on, just a few more weeks..."

"Ah!" Luna said with surprise, "it's almost time for me to raise the moon. I'm afraid I have to call this session to a close."

"Aw, nuts," Leon muttered.

"Ah, well, at least we had a good time," Shining Armor said cheerfully.

"I agree; I learned so much," Fluttershy added. "I at least managed to westernize partially. And I have some animal friends to care for anyway."

"Good game so far chaps, same time next week?"

Everyone answered affirmatively. With that, they saved the game and left one by one. As he got off his computer and stretched, Leon couldn't wait until the next session.

*Note, these lyrics are from Marty Robbins' Ballad of the Alamo.

Minecraft admin, Game 2; Scam

It was another beautiful day in Minecraft. The sun was shining, the land was green and wholesome, and the zombies and skeletons were burning in the sunlight.

Leon stood on one of the battlements of the castle overlooking the server's initial spawn area. It nice to know the server was progressing quite well. Many people had joined. Most were sincere players who really wanted to have fun. Besides the spleefing stadium, there were also areas for survival games and an enormous PVP arena that he had helped to build. The town not far from the castle was where most players "lived" and stored their equipment.

Yes, things were going quite well. Still, there had been numerous players who's only real intention was to grief and troll, and he, Luna, and Eddy didn't put up with that. He had recently banned a player who had killed someone else, then threw their stuff into lava after they had come back for it. Another person had gotten an IP ban for griefing the spleefing stadium with lava while a major tournament was in play.

"Seems like a slow grief day," he remarked to Luna over the headset..

"Indeed, but would you rather someone destroy the town, or x-ray, for that matter?"

"I would rather have people play decently. It feels like while we're sitting here, someone's up to no good somehow."

"They will be up to no good during the survival games we have scheduled for later."

He chuckled at that. Yes, that event would prove interesting. And the admins and mods would have to be on alert for people who were cheating or abusing the rules, so maybe something would happen during that time. He doubted it. Most of the troublemakers got banned or kicked before they had a chance to cause trouble.

"Oh, someone new just logged on."

"Hmm?" Leon looked at the chat. A new player by the name of "Leetman" had joined the server.

"I guess we can go greet them, whoever they are." He teleported over to the new player, who was in a Steve skin.

"Welcome to our server," he typed. "I hope you'll have a great time here."

"Hi, I'm from Planet Minecraft, and I'm here to review the server."

If Luna had been sitting beside him, Leon would have looked over at her. "I think I know what's coming next," he said out loud.

"Yes, this must be the third time this month," she said back.

"Sure enough, the next thing Leetman typed was, "I require OP status in order to properly review the server."

"Called it," Leon said. In the game, he typed back, "Didn't you read the rules?"

"No."

"Read them. Rule 1 clearly states not to ask for OP, mod, admin, or owner status for any reason."

"I'm from Planet Minecraft. That means I can overrule that."

Oh, rly?

"Anyway, I need OP status to check plugins and commands to make sure the game is running ok."

"Ugh," Leon said. He hadn't had to deal with this scam much - this month - but it went the same way each time. Someone would demand OP status to gain most, if not all, the powers of an admin or moderator. They would also claim to be from Planet Minecraft in order to have a "valid" claim for what they were asking. And they would do it under the pretense of reviewing the server.

Well, the first time that had happened was just after he and Luna had become admins. Some guy claimed to be from Planet Minecraft, claimed he was reviewing the server, and said he needed OP status. The owner had done so, hoping perhaps to make the server popular and gain more players.

That hadn't happened. What had happened was that that the new OP had immediately banned everyone with owner, admin, or mod status and proceeded to TNT everything in their absence. When the owner had finally managed to get back on, the main city had been obliterated, the spleef arena had been burned down by a massive lava flow, and spawn had been turned entirely to lava, so the owner, Leon, and Luna had died the moment they'd returned.

Needless to say, the griefer immediately got IP-banned, and it took a while to repair the damage, especially where possessions were concerned; although rollback plugins could undo changes by specific players, they could not replace items that were in destroyed chests, especially enchanted items. Several players had left the server, and most hadn't returned.

Something like that wasn't about to happen again.

"Read the rules," he said again. "Anyone asking for mod status will be denied. If you want to have fun on the server, go ahead and do so, as long as you don't grief or hack."

"This server has a 2/10 rating so far. I require OP status to evaluate it better. If it's really bad, I'm afraid I'll have to close it down."

"I was wondering when he was going to pull out that excuse," Luna commented.

"Indeed."

"It's probably someone who had no idea what to do on a real computer. Why not trick him into deleting system 32?"

"No." Leon shook his head, even though she couldn't see it. "that would be destroying someone else's property."

"And you would rather we do nothing?"

"I would rather we have some fun with him before banning him," Leon suggested.

"Oh, you mean like..."

"Yes." In the game, he typed, "Well, I suppose we have little choice."

"I'm glad you saw reason," the scammer replied. "I require OP status immediately."

"Ok then," Leon typed. "I'll see about that."

He typed in a command that would say "Leetman is now OP!" but wouldn't actually give him any powers. He hit the enter key.

"Thank you. I will now need some time to evaluate the server."

"Okay," Leon said, walking behind a building and typing in the command that made him invisible. He didn't intend to let this guy out of his sight for a moment.

"No! Don't give him OP!" Rainbow Dash said in chat. "He'll ruin the server!"

He private messaged her; "I didn't really give him OP; we'll have fun with him and then ban him."

He followed the newcomer for some distance. The guy didn't seem to be doing anything out of the ordinary...

...Until he came to the main city. Leetman looked it over. Leon had seen this kind of "evaluation" before; it was the prelude to a grief.

"Alert; player Leetman tried to use command /ban Fireheart," flashed a red script in the chat. Considering that was his own in-game name, Leon wasn't surprised. Only he and Luna would have seen it; the average player would have had no idea that this guy had just tried to ban him.

"Alert; player Leetman tried to use command /give Leetman 64 TNT."

"Well, that does it. This guy is definitely trying to grief," Leon noted.

"Do you want to ban him now?"

"Nah, let's keep having fun."

"Hey why aren't my commands working?" the now-obvious griefer asked.

"Oh, they aren't?" Leon typed the command /kill Leetman, though he didn't hit the enter button yet. "Hold on." He hit the key.

An announcement came up saying "Leetman died."

"WTF?"

"Sorry, wrong command. Hold on."

"Oh, let me try this time," Luna begged, sounded excited.

"Okay." Leon watched as her in-game avatar rose high into the air. Several seconds later Leetman joined her; without OP powers, he fell to the ground and died.

"You guys are idiots! You're getting a 0/10 unless you give me OP now! And I'll shut down the server!"

"Hmm. Let me try this." Leon typed /kick player Leetman (You aren't getting OP. Enjoy the server or leave.)

Leetman left the game.

"Do you think he's dumb enough to come back?" The Princess inquired.

"I think he's going to try at least one more time, then he'll try griefing in the usual way."

Sure enough, the scammer came back on a moment later. "Give me OP, NOW, or I will close the server down."

"Try it," Leon said provocatively. 'You don't have the power. You're trying to grief; I saw the commands you gave, trying to ban me and give yourself TNT."

"I needed to test the commands and whether the server was running under realistic circumstances."

At that, Leon laughed so hard he was surprised no one but Luna could hear him, and she was laughing fit to burst. This was a game, and a rather blocky one at that. Reality was not part of the game's design. Oh, sure, some things were realistic, such as gunpowder and minecarts, both things that existed in the real world, but Creepers, Skeletons, and Endermen knocked reality in the game for a loop.

"LOL!"

"HA HA!"

"ROFL!"

"Busted!"

"I'm giving you one, very last, chance to enjoy the server," he typed as he calmed down. "Enjoy the game, and if you can't, then leave. Otherwise, we'll make you leave. Do you understand? We wouldn't care even if you actually were from Planet Minecraft; the only way you become an admin on here is through a history of following the rules and working hard."

For a minute, the epic Steve face stared back at him, not moving. Then, no doubt reluctantly, the player said, "Okay. But can I at least have a tour?"

So he's sticking to the whole review thing, Leon thought. In that case, this guy probably hadn't given up on his idea of griefing. Still, he decided to play along. "Alright, but no more asking or demanding OP, got it?"

"Yes."

"Good." To Luna, he asked, "Can you follow us, invisible, and watch in case he tries to pull something while I'm not watching?"

"Will do."

"Thanks." Back in the game, he said," Okay, this way." He led Leetman through the streets of the town. "This city was founded about a year ago," he began, "when the server became popular and people started to join in big numbers. As you can see, we built obsidian walls around it to keep monsters out, and we have ladders for people to climb up on so that they can practice their archery on any that come close. There is a bank and a store in the town center, and a large tower in the corner of the city wall where people who break the rules but haven't caused any real damage are jailed for a few days before we release them."

He continued on to the castle overlooking the town. "This castle was actually built after most of the basic buildings in the city were completed. It's where I live in the game, and it's where we store many diamond weapons, so it doubles as an arsenal in times of need."

"He's leaving you," Luna alerted him. "No, don't turn around. I'll follow him and see where he goes. You should act as if nothing's amiss."

"Got it." Leon did as she had instructed. "We've built other, secondary towns where necessary," he continued as if the tour was still going. "Some players have constructed elaborate, underground bases for PVP purposes, such as raiding. A few built elaborate plantations, though most prefer the smaller apartment buildings and houses in the towns, as houses outside the walls are common targets for creepers and Endermen, not to mention some people like to raid such houses for anything of value. It's players like that who end up in jails if we catch them; while underground bases are legit for raiding, buildings like big mansions are off-limits."

Leon wiped the sweat off his brow. "What's he doing?"

"He's going right for the Combat arena."

"Well, wait until he breaks something before we jail him."

"Okay. I suppose you can join me now, as long as you remain invisible and keep up the dialogue."

Leon did as Luna had told him to. Now invisible and following the griefer, he could watch as the guy began hitting the wall with his hand.

As soon as one of the stone blocks broke, Leon hit the command /jail Leetman. Instantly the bad egg was teleported to the tower he had mentioned earlier.

"WTF why am I in jail?"

"You must think we're really stupid," Leon commented with more than a little satisfaction. "Did you really think we were going to trust you after you tried to ban us and give yourself TNT? Not to mention we just saw you break a piece off the arena."

"Ban me then. This server's going DOWN!"

"Oh, not before we have some fun with you first."

"Nice one, Leon," Rainbow said, teleporting over to the tower to see the jailed player. "Nice try griefing our server, you jerk!"

"I'LL SEE YOU ALL BANNED FROM THIS GAME!"

"I think you need an attitude adjustment," Leon typed, after which he hit a switch next to the window. A trapdoor opened in the cell, causing Leetman to fall about a hundred feet into a massive cavern filed with lava.

Leetman tried to swim in lava.

There were more spontaneous laughs and variations of such flooding the chat after that message popped up.

"I'LL BAN YOU ALL!"

"Ban this." Leon banned him, with the reason, "You are now OP!"

"Well, that settles that," Luna said, almost disappointedly.

"Yes, well, we have an event to set up."

"Leetman2 joined the server."

Leon just stared at the screen. Was this guy really trying to come back on an alternate account?

"Give me OP, NOW, or else this server will be shut down."

Leetman2 was banned.

Leetman2 was IP banned.

Leetman2 has left the server.

Leon sat back in his chair. One less griefer to worry about.

Crusader Kings 2; Game 1 (part 1); Fool of a king

Crusader Kings 2; Game 1 (part 1); Fool of a king

Leon turned on his computer, reading the newspaper over again as he did so. Today was particularly juicy; Kim Jong Un and his officer cabal had been taken into custody by U.N. agents. Somehow, he'd been found inside South Korea, and the authorities there had arrested him. The paper didn't say exactly how that had happened, but Leon had a vague idea, and wanted to ask someone he knew about it.

He put on his headset and started the game Crusader Kings 2. It was a fairly new addition to his gaming collection, and he could hardly wait.

"Ah, you took your time," Luna's voice said in mock annoyance. "We've been here for about ten minutes already."

"Not my fault; the snow made the bus go slower than it would have normally. We had a blizzard a few days ago, I might remind you."

"Whatever. We're all royalty now," Eddy said, butting in.

"Don't start thinking that either of you can take over for real royalty," Luna said, but her tone wasn't serious. "It would be a shame if either of you became something like Prince Blueblood or bureaucrats or something."

"Don't worry," Leon said, smiling. "I'm a warrior king; I don't just leave war to other people."

"Who are you playing as?"

"The King of France."

"I'm going in as William the Bastard," Eddy proclaimed.

"Edward!"

"Don't yell at me; if you look, that's what it says his name is."

"Did they really name people like that back then?" Luna asked, sounding concerned.

"Only when someone's fathering was... questionable," Leon said.

"Hopefully we can all avoid that."

"Well, in any case, I think we've made our decisions." Leon began clicking the various countries, resulting in a musical melody to sound whenever he did so. "I could sit here for hours just doing this."

"Focus, Leo; the game is what we're trying to play, not it's music."

"Killjoy." Still, Leon selected King Phillip of France - still a child - and waited for the game to start.

"How did that test go on the Civil War, Leon?" Luna asked, still probably choosing her character.

"I think I blew it out of the water, just like an ironclad does when it goes against a wooden ship."

"Wish we had ironclads in this game," Ed complained. "Or for that matter, a working naval battle system."

"Are you telling that you like to have you twenty-thousand man stack sunk by enemy ships?" Leon teased.

"Well, no, mate, I don't really like that idea at all, but the game still feels incomplete without it. I mean, with the new Vikings-based expansion, I can land my guys anywhere I want and start pillaging, and nothing their fleets can do will stop me. It's ridiculous."

"Oh, I've seen the videos; I know that that has to be annoying if you're the one getting pillaged."

"Hmm," Luna hummed, "I think I'll become Duke of Rostov."

"Brace yourselves, everyone; we have a badass over here," Eddy said, and Leon could imagine him pulling his hands back.

The silence from Luna said everything for her.

"Alright, be that way. I'll cream Harold Godwinson without you. Leon, get your giant gunsword ready."

"Ha ha," Leon laughed deadpan. "Just start the game, Eddy."

"Alrighty."

The hub disappeared, and the screen seemed to freeze before it zoomed in on Brittany.

"Yes!" Eddy yelled. "I have the greatest army in the world!"

"Just in the beginning, Ed; remember the Mongols coming from the East; they'd cream you in seconds."

"Well, we'd better build up something worth countering them with by the time we get here, that's all."

"I don't know what you two are worried about," Luna cut in. "I'm the one they'll be hitting first."

"Use your mighty goddess powers to beat them."

"I told you before, I am not a goddess; even if this were real, I wouldn't have the power to take an entire army on my own!"

"Both of you calm down," Leon said, "there's plenty of time to prepare. Let's focus on the challenges we're dealing with now, instead of those we'll be facing a hundred years from now. Ed, that means take England."

"Kinda feels weird, invading my own country," Eddy said as he began packing his army onto boats. "Feels like a glitch in time, to be honest."

"Just don't get tricked into fighting Harald Hardrada," Leon warned as he sorted out his court. "You do that, next thing you'll need is to hire mercenaries, on account of you'll have lost a good many men."

"I'm not stupid, Leo; I've used that trick whenever I've played Harold."

"Hmm," Luna hummed to herself. "I wonder which of these pagan nations I should attack first."

"Take out the biggest first. Then you should hand some that land over to a bishop; that'll convert it faster," Leon advised.

"Ah; my thanks. By the way, would either of you like to cement our relations with a marriage?"

"I don't know," Eddy said. "I've got a few girls in my hometown I've got my eye on."

Both Leon and Luna laughed a little. "How about you, Leon? Would you like to marry any of my daughters?"

Leon thought about making a joke about ponies not being his type - he was sentimentally opposed to intercourse and marriage between the species - but he decided against it. Besides, all the characters in the game were human. "Yes, if you have any, but it'll have be start out as a betrothal; my guy's too young for marriage yet."

"Right then." Leon abruptly received a message, asking for his character - a custom one he'd made - to betroth a Rostovian bride. He had to admit, she was a quite a sight, with golden hair running down her face. He clicked the accept button.

My Court Chaplain and my vassals might complain, but what do I care if she's Orthodox and I'm Catholic? They're both Christian denominations.

"Harold's just won at Stamford Bridge," Eddy reported.

"Good." Leon set his Chancellor to forge a claim in "Just be careful, he might raise mercenaries to make up the difference."

"He can't raise enough of 'em to make a difference."

That was likely to be true. At any rate, Leon made sure he'd put the best candidates in the best spots in his court. He set his Steward to collect taxes in the capital of Paris, his Chaplain to research cultural technology, and he set his spymaster to scheme. He sent his Marshal to research military technology. His initial plan was to extend into Spain, and secure at least Medium Crown Authority. Meanwhile, he would try to strengthen his military might, in case such a person as the Holy Roman Emperor began a war against him, as well as increasing taxes and economic strength. Right now, he didn't have as much power as he might have, although he - nominally - controlled most of modern day France. That would soon change, one way or another.

Meanwhile Luna declared holy war on one of the pagan chiefdoms next to her duchy. "Victory shall be mine!" the Princess declared as her allied duchies quickly joined.

"With a voice such as yours, the enemy'll just cower as your troops overrun them," Eddy joked.

Leon imagined Luna giving Eddy a fierce look.

Leon set about looking for a target in Spain to declare a holy war of his own on. He found one in the Muslim Emirate of Zaragoza, went to the character, and declared war for the province.

Leon wasted no time in calling up both his vassals' levies as well as his own. At this period in time, France had a sizable army, one he hoped was strong enough to readily defeat the Muslims. The greenish state just to the south was likely to be a good first target. Once his armies had assembled, he grouped them together and sent them into Spain. He had to cross through the non-allied Christian Aragon, but he had no other way to get them where he wanted them, and besides, there probably hadn't been a proper recognized system of military access anyway. The small enemy army that tried to fight got squashed like a cockroach under a boot. Then he set about besieging the castle.

In the meantime, he knew he was going to lose four provinces - the Duchy of Normandy - when, or perhaps if, Eddy made himself King of England. He didn't intend to let the British man keep them, of course. The problem was that Eddy would be looking for that, and he wasn't just going to give them up.

It was a better situation than if he'd chosen to play as Brittany. The only places he could invade then would have been Ireland and Wales, leading to a prolonged series of conflicts between them. One of them would probably end up subservient to another, which was nothing any of the three players wanted to have happen.

"The invasion's going well," Eddy reported. "Harold's going to be my prisoner before long."

"Don't do anything stupid with him, he might be able to pay a big ransom."

"What I'm counting on... Oh wait, I just got a great idea." Eddy's voice sounded like he was on the verge of laughing uncontrollably. "Oh yes, I've got a great idea."

"What is it?" Luna and Leon asked.

"You'll see. All England will see."

Leon was a bit puzzled. Other than accepting the ransom, he didn't see any point in keeping Harold Godwinson prisoner. Executing him wasn't a good idea either, considering the -40 penalty to vassal relations that acts of tyranny brought with them. Eddy would probably lose his new kingdom if he did that. It was possible to release someone, and get a +10 relations boost with one's vassals, but other than that, the player got nothing from it. Banishment was another option, but that would give Harold the chance to continue pestering Eddy later, and Eddy's vassals wouldn't like it.

Eddy didn't let any more on, but his fits of giggles let Leon know that, whatever happened to Harold, it wouldn't be good.

"How's the war going, Luna?"

"It was a bit dicey at first," she answered. "Pagan nations make up for their other deficiencies with massive numbers of melee infantry, as you know. But our alliance was able to destroy their army, and now it's just a waiting game."

"The sieges aren't all that interesting," Leon admitted, "but the only other way you could win the war is by capturing the chief outright, and that rarely happens."

"I know. I'll move on to the next chief in line once this war's over."

"Knocking over dominoes one by one, eh?"

"Yes. This Holy War Casus Belli is overpowered for Rostov, to be honest."

"But it's so much fun that you don't care."

"Oh yes," she said, laughing a little. "And I'm going to use it as much as possible. After all, this gets a lot harder once the Mongols start coming in."

"Yeah," Leon agreed. "Same thing in Medieval 2; Total War; the Mongols come in the middle of the game and either screw up Russia or the Middle East. Try holding onto Jerusalem as the French when your best castles and cities are an entire continent away."

"I wouldn't know anything about that, as I haven't played that game... yet. What's it like?"

"You'd have to play to really know, but it's cool. And the Kingdoms expansion is great, no doubt there."

"Interesting. Perhaps I may look into it. Edward, how is the conquest of England going?"

"At seventy-five percent but this idiot doesn't know when to quit."

"I've turned wars around at negative seventy-five," Leon put in.

"If you have allies and if they start playing intelligently. This guy has neither of those things going for him. Harald Hardrada is a bigger pain, to be honest."

"Just be careful."

"Can't win a war by bein' careful."

"Whatever, man." Leon successfully captured another province. The Muslim leader opposing him hadn't called anyone else in - a stupid mistake - and he were going to pay for it. The siege of the castle was finished, with Leon's troops relatively undamaged. He immediately began sieging the next holding in line.

"Oh, this is bad," came the voice of a slightly put-off Luna. "Just suffered a defeat at the hands of the barbarians."

"You're Russia; just send in more."

"Sorry to burst your bubble, but this is Russia before it was Russia, if you know what I mean. I don't have a massive steamroller to drive around!"

"Sorry. If the need arises, buy mercenaries. They're good early on, if you can afford them."

"Big if. You don't get much money early in the game unless you've bought the Republic expansion and play as one."

"I'd love to buy it, but we both have more immediate problems; the evil hordes facing us. And the best way to get more money is grab more land."

"I had most of my land for myself at the beginning of the game," Luna commented, "but I had to give much of it away because I was way over my demesne limit." She paused. "Odd, considering that I haven't really heard or seen that word much since Twilight and her friends freed me from the clutches of Nightmare Moon, and yet it was commonplace before my banishment."

Leon felt a twinge of pity. Coming back after a thousand years had to be hard; for one thing, all of one's friends and neighbors were dead. For another, everything had changed; languages, the words used in a language, daily practice, morals, anything you could think of and it almost certainly had changed.

Princess Luna hadn't been forthcoming with her feelings, and considering the pain that would have entailed, he could understand. She had been pleasantly surprised when she found out how popular she was among fans of MLP. And, although she said little about it to him (or to Eddy, for that matter), he could tell she was glad to have them as friends.

Leon succeeded in taking down the final holding, bringing his warscore to 100%. He sent demands for surrender. The Muslim warlord had no choice but to accept. He was in jail before long, and the green territory switched to blue. Leon quickly went around gifting the church town and the city to deserving vassals, while keeping the castle for himself, at least for now. To help switch the religion, he sent his Court Chaplain to convert the people there. Naturally, rebellion would probably be rife in the area, but there was little he could do about it for now.

"Not bad," Luna said. "But you'll have a long way to send armies to crush rebels."

"Well, I have to start somewhere." Leon moved his army to southern France before dismissing them. After he did, he moved the viewpoint to cover Luna's war. Something must have gone right; she was winning the war, with only a couple holdings to take, both of them under siege.

"Nice!" he said as the province switched colors.

"It wasn't all that hard. When you have a gang of duchies as Rostov does, it's easy. Finland is next!"

"Uh, Princess, that might not be a good idea."

"What? Why not?"

"Because the last few times Russia fought Finland... let's just say the Russians came out looking more like the losers than the winners."

"But they did win. You told me that a while ago."

"At unbearable cost."

"Well, it's a different time now. And they are pagan, so..."

"Well, ok. Just don't say I didn't warn ya."

"Don't say "I told you so."

"Deal." Leon clicked onto a Muslim stale near Zaragosa and declared war.

"Finally!" Eddy sounded excited. The reason came up onscreen in a declaration confirming the defeat of Harold Godwinson.

"Nice," Leon said again. What are you going to do with him?"

"Oh, I'm first going to release him, then... make him my court jester."

"What!?"

"WHAT!? YOU DID NOT!"

"I did," the Englishman said, giggling.

"You can't treat royalty like that!"

"I already did, Princess. Old Harold's now juggling and making a complete idiot of himself in my court."

"But... but... but...."

Meltdown...

"Uh, Ed," Leon said slowly, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Ah, what's he gonna do, complain?"

Seconds later, Leon received a message saying that William the Conqueror had died under suspicious circumstances.

"What the?"

"I think that's a big complaint there, Ed."

"No shit! Now I have to try playing as his damn son, and he sucks! Fuck it, I'm killing Harold the asshole!"

"WHAT HAVE WE TOLD YOU ABOUT SWEARING!?!"

As though oblivious to the Royal Canterlot Voice, Eddy imprisoned Harold Godwinson despite the fact that he had no proof of his involvement in the murder and had him executed.

"Um... Ed, you just earned a -80 relations with all your vassals."

"Screw 'em."

Seconds after that, Eddy's new character Robert was excommunicated.

"You have got to be kidding me! My Marshal just sent a letter to the Pope excommunicating me!"

"Eddy, don't...!"

Too late. "Let's see... imprison my marshal and execute him as well."

Leon facepalmed. "Another negative 80. I'm surprised your kingdom hasn't self-destructed already."

Moments later, that was exactly what happened. Little provinces and large duchies began breaking away from the Kingdom of England.

Oh boy...

To be continued... Will Eddy succeed in bringing order to his fractured empire? Or will the rightous rebels unseat him? Tune in for the next Crusader Kings chapter to find out!

Civilization V; Game 1 (part 1); 5v5 clubbing

Leon sat down and threw his schoolbag down on the floor. He leaned back in his chair; it had been a tiring day, featuring the evil of algebra in a test that he was sure he'd failed.

If they want us to learn it, why don't they make it something more than inane gibberish?

Whatever. His interest was in history, and if the math lovers didn't like it, then too bad. And he had something to do that was much more important to him right now.

He signed onto his Steam account and hit the play button on Civilization V. The game opened to the theme of Brave New World; he'd purchased the Gods and Kings and Brave New World expansions, which significantly altered the original game. While he'd played Civilization Revolution on Xbox 360, he liked this game much better.

He put on his headset and waited. After receiving an invite to a game from Eddy's account, he accepted and turned the headset on. "Hey guys."

"Good afternoon, Leon," Luna answered. "Are we all ready for the game?"

"Oh yes."

"Leo, don't just sit there and do nothing like you always do."

"Ed, gaining culture and building stuff in my cities counts as doing something. Just because I don't conquer people and city-states left and right doesn't mean I'm not contributing."

"Well it sure looks like it."

"Knock it off, you two," the Princess demanded. "We have other participants, as you well know, and I would like it if you behaved yourselves for once."

"Fine," both humans answered. Leon asked, "Who's coming?"

"Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, and Shining Armor, with Fluttershy saying she might join."

"That's great!"

"Yes. I'm glad she's gaining friends. She's become more confident since we last met in person."

A sweet whistle came to their ears, followed by another right afterwards. "Hey, guys!" Rainbow said, her confident voice coming through the headset. "You ready for this? I'm going to rock this game!"

"Don't be so modest, Dash," Applejack said sarcastically. "Howdy y'all!"

"Degemer Mat," Leon said in greeting; Welcome was what the phrase meant. "Mat an trauo ganeoc'h?" How are you?

"Uh, gonna assume that there's a greetin'."

"Leo, stop speaking French," Ed demanded as another couple of whistles came up.

"Breton!"

"Whatever."

"Really, you guys?" Twilight said condescendingly. "Another fight over language and countries?"

"He started it," Leon and Eddy said at the same time.

"I don't care who started it, I'll finish it!" Luna warned.

"Good atmosphere already," Shining's voice came through. "Not even a couple minutes in and there's a fight."

"Okay, the both of you," Luna said to the two quarreling humans. "Stop it, right now." After a few seconds of silence, she continued, "Hopefully we can get this game started now."

` There was another whistle, and the usernames of Rarity and Pinkie (TheFashionista and Cakesaregreat!!!!!!!!!!!) came up on screen. "Sorry we're late everypony," the unicorn mare said. "I had to clean up after today's work in Carousel Boutique, and Pinkie, er..."

"I had to help make ten ginormous, humungous cakes for ten different birthday parties today, and that means ten parties to throw for ponies all over Ponyville! I ended up falling asleep on the table during the last party, and I had to take a bath afterwards because there was so much frosting all over myself! Granted, that was because I licked all the frosting off, but nopony should let even the least bit of cake go uneaten!"

"Rules?" Leon asked, trying not to laugh.

"There will be a timer for turns, so we don't wait forever for someone, and quick combat is enabled. The game will be set on standard, so it'll be decently long, but not, I think, too long. The game will be one we save, because we obviously won't get to complete it in one night. I was thinking of livestreaming this, but..."

"Nuts!" Leon said.

"That's what I was going to say to anyone who attacked me," Twilight said in an amused voice. "Especially if that someone likes playing an aggressive power."

"Hey, lay off," Rainbow said. "I'm going to conquer the world by storm, just like the pegasi of old!"

"China is all-round better," Twilight countered.

"Can we get to the part where we choose a country to control?" Leon asked.

"I'm playing China," Twilight confirmed.

"England," Eddy called.

"Russia," came Luna's reply.

"The Netherlands," said Applejack.

Another whistle came, then a small sound like a dove's coo.

"Fluttershy? Is that you?"

"Twilight?" the yellow pegasus said quietly. "Oh good, I thought I might be in the wrong room."

"No no, you're in the right place. In fact, we were just choosing our countries. Come join us!"

"Oh, okay. Well, I guess I'll play as the Celts. No, wait, the Iroquois."

"Hmm," Rarity hummed. "I'll play France."

"Oooooh, India likes being happy, so I'll play as them!"

"Uh, Pinkie, you realize that 'benefit' limits the number of cities you can build, right?" Twilight asked.

"What we lack in numbers, we make up for in happiness!"

"Okay, well," Rainbow murmured, "I guess I'll play Germany."

"Uh," Shining said, "I already chose them."

"Darn it! Fine, Aztecs then."

"You know what they say about Montezuma, Rainbow," Leon teased.

"Yeah, but at least he gets results. Speaking of which, it's your turn."

"It's a hard choice; I can't decide between India and Egypt."

"You always play as India, mate; choose someone else."

"Celts, then. But don't harass me."

"He won't be able to; you're going to be on different teams in order to keep the peace," Luna announced.

"Then who..."

"I think Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack will join you on a team; Eddy will join me, Pinkie Pie, Shining Armor, and Fluttershy on the other. It makes things even, as there is a human on each side. Please adjust the team options as necessary.

Leon, Twilight, Rainbow, and Applejack all chose team 1; the others went on team 2.

"Uh what map are we playing on?" Leon asked.

"Continents."

"Okay, so land and sea for everyone."

"Yes. If you're all ready, please hit the ready button, and switch to a private channel for your team."

Leon did so, and after a moment, the screen changed to one explaining Celtic history (or, more precisely, that of Boudicca, the British warrior rebel queen).

"Y'all ready?" Applejack asked.

"Yeah," Leon answered. "Rainbow, try not to rush before you're ready - before we're all ready."

"Seriously, Leon? Who do you think I am?"

"Well, there was that game a couple weeks ago where you rushed straight in and got yourself clobbered by France because you rushed without any support," Twilight quipped.

"Hey, that was one time."

"And there was the game before that, where you got wiped out by Gandhi because you thought he was weak, and got all your cities blown up by nuclear missiles."

"And the time before that," Rarity added, "when barbarians destroyed all the tiles in your capital while your army was being wasted attacking city-states."

"Okay, okay! Get off my back, will ya? I won't go in until we're all ready. If we decide as a team to attack them."

"Pinkie Promise?"

"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Now can we please just play?"

The briefing shifted to the left, and under it a button saying "Begin your journey" appeared where a loading message had been. Leon clicked it.

Looks pretty decent. he'd started next to a source of wheat, some cows, a river, and, as was befitting the Celts, numerous forest tiles. A source of cotton and a source of spice were also nearby.

"Ah guess we can, Rainbow," Applejack said in reply to her cyan friend, "and... great iron horseshoes, ah got me three wheat off the bat!"

"Really?" Leon said, incredulous. If that was correct, Applejack would have no trouble growing her capital whatsoever.

'Yep. And there's a couple o' marshes fer polders later, a couple hills with gold... oh yeah, and ah'm on a coast."

"Kinda expected for the Dutch."

"Well, I'm sunk in jungle up to my neck," Rainbow said in a slightly negative tone, "with two cotton and a source of silver."

"On a river with some copper and incense," Twilight said. "Going to shoot for Writing first."

"Oh, I've got cotton and silk! If only this were a real city..."

Leon settled his city, which was instantly named Edinburgh. Remembering the special ability of the Celts, he typed in all chat, "Hands and hooves off Catholicism."

"Really?" came the English response. "You never use anything else."

"Says the guy who always names his religion something that exults himself."

"Touche. Well whatever lol."

"Do ya gotta get up in his face every time the two o' ya disagree?" Applejack asked him, with a hint of concern.

"The short answer is yes. The long answer is, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssss."

He heard the farm pony and Rainbow Dash giggle. In any event, he started building a monument in his city; some would have gone for a worker or a scout, but he was less concerned with military problems that cultural. Of course, sometimes that proved to be a weakness, but when it worked...

Anyway, he sent his lone warrior off to the north. It uncovered an ancient ruin, though it was going to take another turn to actually get it. His strategy was to scout in a circular manner, so that all the territory around his position was revealed, rather than sending it off in a single direction.

"Thinkin' maybe we should combine our research," Applejack suggested. "Ah reckon it'll be a lot faster than going off on our own."

"I guess it can't hurt," Leon said.

"Oh come on," Rainbow protested. "We need iron and horses more than some silly beakers."

"Never underestimate the value of science," Twilight admonished. "We should go with Pottery first, with Writing, after which Animal Husbandry and Mining would be good to pick up."

"Come on, I want better units!"

"And you'll get them faster if you can research technologies faster!"

"Ohhhhhhhhhh, fine..."

Leon switched his research to Pottery, and saw the time for it's completion decrease as everyone else on the team chose it as well. As the timer for the turn wore down, he took a look at his allies' starting positions. Applejack had indeed started with three wheat, and a number of fishing spots and a source of whales were just offshore. Rainbow was surrounded by jungle, though a couple sources of bananas and the cotton and silver she had specified made up for it.

The game was off to a good start. The ruins turned out to provide 20 free culture, which he intended to use either on Tradition policies; piety would be good to pick up later, considering the fact that he hoped to play a religious game, but Tradition was better for people who were staying small, as he planned to. Not that he was going to be weak by any means, but it was easier to deal with fewer cities and fewer population.

Leon had more than three forest tiles, allowing him to gather two faith per turn. It was only five turns in that he was able to choose a pantheon. He chose Oral Traditions, which gave him 1 culture for every worked plantation.

"Go ahead and play the religious game if you want, Leon," Rainbow said. "It's not going to matter much to me."

"It will if I pick the belief where you gain a 20% increase in combat strength against cities with my religion, then I spread it to you and any cities you end up targeting."

"Ooooh," she said, interested. "That would be awesome!"

"Just don't get carried away with war," Twilight said. "There are more ways to win than taking everyone's capital."

"If by more ways you mean easy ways, then yeah."

"Hey!"

While the two mares stared at their screens, muttering things under their breaths, Leon adopted Tradition, which gave him +3 culture in his capital and boosted the rate of border expansion. It also unlocked building the Hanging Gardens, which provided +6 food and a free Garden, as well as +1 culture. Not the most powerful wonder ever, but for those who loved to grow their cities, it was good enough. Stonehenge would be nice for the faith boost, but honestly he'd liked it better when it simply provided +6 culture in the vanilla game. Oh well.

"By the way, what policies are you guys taking?"

"Gonna be goin' fer Tradition," said Applejack. "Best fer growin' big cities. Think it'll be the path yer goin' down, too."

"Liberty for me," Twilight confirmed. "I need cities, and the people in them."

"Honor. Nuff said. Going to beat those barbarians into the ground, and then it'll be the other team's turn."

"I'll be doing Tradition as well," Rarity noted. "It fits my cultural designs.

Leon watched as territory was discovered by each nation. A particular whistling sound, different from that of someone joining the game, rang out as Twilight discovered Cerro de Potosi, a natural wonder that provided +10 gold to anyone who worked it. Of course, that meant someone would have to settle a city near it - Rainbow would probably want it to fund her armies and buy units, while Twilight would probably want to use it to simply boost gold production for whatever she saw fit.

Leon rarely started building settlers before he reached a population of six in his capital, and preferably longer. It was easier to manage one city, and it was difficult for one city to be unhappy - just as it was all too easy for multiple cities to lose any shred of happiness they once had. In this case, the gold the mountain would provide seemed juicy... for a moment or so. But it was very far from his starting point, and unless he wanted to pay an indemnity for roads, he wasn't going to settle there. The best settling policy was to settle decently far away from your starting city, but close enough that the city could be defended and that the road cost would be minimal.

"Be careful, AJ; Eddy's going to go for the ocean as well."

"Thanks fer the heads up, but ah think ah can handle it. He's got a whole ocean to cross before he can hit anything."

"Nopony knows what Pinkie will do," Rainbow observed. "In fact, I get the feeling she doesn't even know what she's gonna do."

"What do you think Fluttershy is going to do?" Leon asked.

"Well, knowing her, she's probably going to play very conservatively," Twilight said.

"Good. She can vote with us next election."

"Ha ha... not funny. As I was going to say, she's probably going to focus on building stuff in her cities; I wouldn't say she's the real threat on their team. As for the other three... You know my brother, he loves playing a military game, not surprising as he's Captain of the Royal Guard. Luna... she's playing Russia, do you think she has any other plan?"

"I won't disagree with you there."

"As for Ed, he chose England. They don't have a special building, and their special units are both designed for aggressive play. I think we can both see what will happen there."

"I guess. AJ, that means you have to be ready with a lot of Sea Beggars when he starts hopping around."

"Not as good with a navy as ah am with an army, but ah'll try, and ah'll have cannons to help out."

"Alright then. In the meantime, what's our plan?"

"I think you all know what direction I'm going in," the purple unicorn said confidently.

"Yeah... Egghead Lane," Rainbow giggled.

"Just for that, you're not getting an embassy."

"Whatever. Egghead," the pegasus added in a not-quite-whisper. "Going to war big time."

"Not unless we all all agree."

As the others began to argue, Leon discovered his first barbarian encampment. "If you want a job, Rainbow, I just uncovered some barbarians."

"Sounds good."

In the meantime, the game progressed. He finished the monument, and went to work on a scout. They were armed only with staffs, but if they captured an ancient ruin, they might turn into archers, making them a ranged super-scout. He was hoping that was what happened. Units like that were more than useful.

"Hey, Rarity!" Rainbow exclaimed, as a French city came into existence by Cerro de Potosi.

"It's mine! I settled it first!"

"I needed that money for my armies!"

"Hardly; I need it to fund mine, in case anyone thinks of messing up French beauty! And I need that gold to win over cultural city-states. Go after a different Natural wonder. Not to mention that you can't you could declare war on me to get this."

"One of the times when I would actually support teamkilling."

"I thought you'd learned your lesson concerning hat when you got kicked from three World at War matches in a row," Leon said. "Come on; We couldn't play for a few seconds before you killed someone and got kicked."

"Lighten up; it was funny hearing their reactions."

"Focus, Dash," came a southern drawl. "Rarity ain't the enemy."

Rainbow sighed. "Yeah. I just..."

"Be quicker next time, maybe you'll get it."

Leon's scout managed to find an ancient ruin. When he popped it, it gave him 20 culture. Not exactly an upgraded archer, but it was good for social policies. He'd already chosen the Tradition branch. He went for Legalism this time around. Although not immediately useful, it was necessary to gain access to Monarchy and Landed Elite, both of which were very useful. Aristocracy would have given him a boost to wonder building, but all things considered, he could get that soon enough. By now, the group had researched enough technology to reach Bronze Working and start towards the other Classical-era techs.

"We need Iron Working," Rainbow argued. "I want to upgrade my Jaguars."

"I disagree; Philosophy should be the way to go," Leon objected.

"Drama and Poetry is what we need," Rarity spoke up.

"No! I need better armies!"

"I say we go down the Philosophy route!"

"Drama for amphitheaters!"

"Now calm down, y'all," Applejack interrupted. "Ah'm sure we can find a solution..."

"Well, I'm going for Iron Working no mater what the rest of you say!"

"I'm researching Drama, and there's nothing any of you can do to make me change my mind!"

Leon found himself facepalming, and from the clopping noises coming from Twilight and Applejack, both them had facehoofed.

Princess Luna didn't know how to pull together the loose alliance that was supposed to be a team. The biggest problem was Edward, naturally. His combative attitude often hurt his own side as much as the enemy. Shining Armor was cooperative, as Fluttershy. However, Pinkie was another matter entirely. She was as much a random element in a game as she was in real life. She could be playing sanely one moment, then do something absolutely crazy the next. Occasionally, this had the effect of losing games. The last time Pinkie had played Civilization 5, she'd panicked when someone was about to steal a cultural victory from her. She launched a nuclear blitzkrieg in response, but this failed to have the effect she'd wanted; the enemy team, militarily superior, leveled almost all her cities to population level 1. Luna's team might have won that one if it wasn't for that.

On the other hoof, she had sometimes won a game from her wild antics. So maybe if she got lucky...

So far, Eddy hadn't stuck to the proposed science route at all. He'd gone directly for Mining without consulting - or listening to - anyone. Pinkie jumped directly into throwing out workers; her excuse was that she was going to throw them all a party.

Too bad I decided to go on with the livestream in secret, she thought. If things were a little different, this might be funny.

"What do you think we should do, Princess?" Shining Armor asked.

"Be careful, in case Rainbow Dash decides to come knocking with an army at her back. I'm not all too sure what your sister will do, but she loves to gain new technologies, so I doubt she'll be much of a military threat, at least for now. Applejack will have an army ready, and she's more cautious than, if just as aggressive as, Rainbow. Rarity will be trying to build a civilization with high production and profit, so her weakness will be her trade network. I think militarily she's less of a threat than Rainbow and Applejack. Leon... will be playing culturally and religiously, so he'll be less of a threat initially, but his units will have some upgrades, and he knows how to use a small force to maximum benefit."

"What do you want me to do?" Fluttershy asked quietly.

"We need you to expand into forest regions; it will make it easier for you to defend yourself, and it will give you a bonus when you start building longhouses. Shining Armor, we need an army, a big one. Use it to crush as many barbarian encampments as you can. Pinkie, use your excess happiness to boost your culture. Edward, build an enormous navy."

"Oh I'm sorry, did you say something?" Ed asked.

"I wasn't listening," Pinkie added, "I was looking at that chocolate bar across the room."

Luna facehoofed. "At least pretend you're paying attention and are interested in the game."

"Not to worry, Princess," Shining said. "I'll get on it right away."

"Me too," Fluttershy agreed.

Luna continued playing. After settling Moscow, she'd set about to building another warrior. She had queued up a scout after that, then a worker, then a monument; culture was a secondary priority compared to getting an army into the field for her. She had landed by only a couple cotton tiles, but it was likely that she would have large amounts of iron and horses to use or trade. To exploit that, she had researched Animal Husbandry, and was rewarded by three horse tiles appearing once that technology had completed. Now she had two big iron sources near her capital, and she would be rolling in resources, more than enough to supply her team.

I love playing Russia. You always have too much of everything.

Except, unfortunately, gold. In time, Moscow would be a rich city, but they were still in the early Classical era, so money was scarce. She was able to settle a second city, Kiev, so now she would have two centers of production. She sighed. It wasn't going to be easy to win with an ocean between the two continents; most transports were likely to face attack on their way to the other side. Unless the navy of one side managed to beat down the defenses of the other, it would be a slaughter for the attacking force.

And her team had to accomplish this with two of their five members off doing their own thing. Likely Eddy was going to go navy, but would go right when someone else said to go left just for the fun of it, while Pinkie... well, nopony ever knew what Pinkie was going to do. Luna suspected that even she didn't always know what she would do. Holding a team together wasn't always easy, even among friends.

For that matter, holding Equestria together was a full time job. Not that Equestria was on the brink of tearing off into half a dozen separate countries, but the demands of one city and another sometimes clashed, as did the interests of different provinces. Every other week she had some dignitary from some offended party calling out for justice. And, unlike this game, the consequences of a bad decision were lasting, and sometimes dangerous.

Now that I think about it, compared to keeping Equestria from falling apart every other day, this isn't so bad. She smirked, glad none of the others could see her. And it'll be quite funny to hear their reactions when I reveal they've been recorded the entire time.

"Bonk!" Rainbow said as she exterminated another barbarian encampment. "Another camp of scumbags off the map, thanks to your friendly neighborhood Rainbow Dash!"

"Yeah," Leon said. "There were no contradictions at all in what you just said."

"Huh?"

"Never mind," he said as sniggers of laughter came from the other players. In the meantime, he had the settler he'd made a few turns back settle next to Uluru, a natural wonder that provided 6 Faith and 2 Food to it's owner. Next to the new city of Dublin was a tile of horses and some iron, with a source of gold nearby that could be incorporated into his empire with border expansion. Since he'd already gotten the Legalism policy, he automatically started with a monument, so he didn't have to worry about wasting time building one.

He growled when he saw how poor his current production was. Although the population would rise to size 2 pretty quickly, it was going to take forever to build the worker he wanted, or the even the granary hat was his second choice, which he settled on.

At least his proto-military wasn't too bad. He had a couple Pictish Warriors, the special unit for the Celts. They were similar to the spearmen they replaced, except for the fact that they had no movement cost to pillage, had a 20% combat bonus in foreign lands, and took 50% of an enemy unit's strength as Faith every time they killed a unit. That, and they were armed with broadswords and cool-looking shields.

So far, the three-way deadlock for technology hadn't been resolved. He'd gotten what he'd wanted, and so had Rarity and Rainbow, but they'd lost some time over that impasse. If the other team was cooperating better, they'd be hard pressed to catch up.

"I wish it wasn't Flutters we were beating on," he said at last, and it was the truth; he found the idea of beating down the sweet, shy yellow pony in any manner to be hard to take, even in a game.

"Yeah," Rainbow said, which half surprised him. "We went to Cloudsdale the other day, a kind of gals' day out." Her voice rose, sounded excited.

"I'm guessing you had fun there."

"Yep. Got to see a big pegasi race, watched some pegasi sports... oh yeah, and we met the Wonderbolts! Boo-yah!"

"Oh?"

"Yeah; even the word 'awesome' doesn't cut it for them."

"To say she was 'geeked out' after meeting them is appropriate," Twilight commented. "She was pretty light-headed for the next few days."

"Just because I rained on you that one time...!"

"Yes, and 'that one time' ruined a report I had written for the Princess!"

"Hey, you rewrote it, right?"

"That's not the point!" Twilight said angrily. "It took an hour to re-write the whole thing!"

"Girls, can we refocus on the game?" Rarity asked. "As much as I would love to hear the two of you catch up on your misadventures, perhaps we could discuss it later?"

"You guys ever hear the phrase, 'We must hang together, or we must all hang separately?'" Leon asked dryly.

"I did!" Twilight answered excitedly. "It was said by..."

"Okay, history lesson over," Rainbow interrupted. "Back to the game." Twilight huffed in anger, but kept quiet.

Leon, meanwhile, continued his efforts. It wouldn't be long now before the first real religion triggered. Religion spread slowly at first, and it spread even slower when you weren't basing your game on religious efforts. Later in the game, it would speed up, but at the start, the main followers of a faith were those in the capital.

In the meantime, he got another policy; this time he chose Monarchy, which gave +1 gold and -1 unhappiness for every two citizens in the capital. It was tempting to chose Landed Elite, which would have given him +2 food and +10% growth in the capital, but he needed the money, and his happiness level was getting lower than he was comfortable with.

Working through the next several turns, he was able to build a plantation for the spices, adding a useful +4 happiness to his empire, as well as finish the library and barracks for the capital.

A loud, tribal whistle met his ears when another turn rolled around. "Yay! Great Prophet!"

"Oooh, already?" Twilight asked eagerly.

"Yeah. I think we should be making plans for this."

"Don't really care one way or the other," Rainbow said.

"I agree," Rarity added.

"You will when you find it easier to spread your culture to me when we're the same religion."

"Hmm," she said, reconsidering. "Very well, I see your point."

"Anyway..." Leon popped the Prophet, selecting Catholicism as the formal name. He chose Church Property as the founder belief (+2 gold for every city following the faith) and Religious Art (+5 Culture and +5 Tourism from the Hermitage), after which he hit the button confirming his choices.

"Well, not much to do now in that field but wait," he said.

A few seconds later, a specific tone sounded, and a image of a bishop's hat appeared above his own.

"Oooh, let see what this one is," Twilight said. "Edward made it, and it's the..." she stopped.

"What?" Leon asked.

"...It's the Church of Tea and Guinness."

Leon sat there, appalled, but at the same time trying not to laugh.

Halo Wars, Game 2; Turtle wars

Halo Wars, Game 2; Turtle wars

Leon yawned as the tone on the Xbox signifying that he'd joined a party sounded.

"Don't fall asleep on us now, Leon," Luna teased over her headset. "I still have yet to raise the moon."

"I won't," Leon said, and meant it. "Waiting at an airport is one of the most boring things ever without books."

"I wouldn't be sure," Luna replied. "I've been to an airport, and all the different kinds of people is always interesting."

Leon joined the game in Halo Wars Luna and Eddy had already created. He chose Anders, Luna went for Forge, and Ed went for Cutter. Playing as triple UNSC did have some risks; it was easier to rush UNSC players than Covenant, for two reasons; the Covenant had leaders, and they had shields. However, their units were generally more powerful than those of the Covenant, and even a Scarab had trouble facing down a full army of tanks, especially when it was getting rained on by UNSC leader powers.

"You guys sure we should do a UNSC trio?"

"It's something new and challenging," Luna remarked. "And we haven't done this for a while."

"Yeah, Covenant are easy to play," Eddy agreed. "And I was a little tired of playing them."

After all of them had chosen a ready status, the screen stayed the same for a few moments, then an opposing team formed against them.

"Wonder who these guys are," he wondered.

"Solar Flare 999, Snowfire888, and Stonewall7538," Luna said, reading the names of the enemy team. "Haven't seen any of them before."

"Well, whoever they are, they're getting a beatdown," Leon said confidently.

A few minutes earlier...

Princess Celestia walked down the hallway to her room. It had been a busy day. She lifted a hoof to her mouth as she yawned. Many of her subjects thought the hardest part of her job was raising the sun in the morning. The reality was that enough unicorns could perform the same job, and considering that the sun was linked to magic, just like most if not all things in the Equestrian world, it was easier than most ponies thought it was. Granted, she put on a show during the Summer Sun Celebration, which probably added to the false illusion, something that amused her and made her chuckle a little now. Much harder, though, in her opinion, was managing a country. In particular, politics, both internal and external.

Although Equestria was an absolute monarchy/diarchy, political parties, or perhaps political leanings was more accurate, still formed bases for those who wanted change, wanted things to stay as they were, or wanted something in the middle. It could be pesky dealing with them. Nobles tended to like having more privileges, or regaining privileges they'd lost over the millennium she'd ruled. She continued to say no, albeit politely. What nobles would call commoners made their own appeals, some of which she accepted and some she had to deny. While she regretted having to refuse some of these, she wasn't about to crown herself or Luna as queen, or declare Equestria the premiere power on the planet. Nor was she about to kick out immigrants who had come to Equestria.

Today had seen a lot of the latter issue; angry lower-class ponies were upset that Griffon, Zebra, and Saddle Arabian immigrants were taking jobs that they themselves could have held. Most of the petitioners were from Manehattan and other coastal cities, where most of the immigrants came in. Although she was sympathetic, she refused in all particulars to deport those who came freely to Equestria, often at great cost in money, in order to have a fresh start. Naturally, that got the petitioning ponies quite angry, but they wouldn't dare try to argue with their beloved and supposedly divine Princess, and instead had taken out their anger on the nobility, who they accused of inviting the immigrants so they could hire those who were willing to work for less pay for the same job.

The Princess knew she wasn't divinity, despite her powers and accumulated knowledge throughout the centuries. The way she'd handled the problem had been a little less than perfect, or more than a little. After a few members of both parties had come close to exchanging blows, she'd had Guards clear them all out of the throne room, with a threat to arrest anypony who resorted to violence. After that incident, she'd ordered everypony out of the room, with only one pony to appear at a time after that.

She sighed. She didn't like losing her temper, or coming anywhere close to it. With over a thousand years' worth of experience, she had practice at making sure that anger was far from her even in situations that would have caused a blood vessel to pulse in someone with less patience. But today had been frustrating. On top of that, Prince Blueblood had come in and asked for another raise in his allowance. She'd said no politely at first, but he hadn't taken the hint, and kept bugging her. At last, she'd threated to actually lower his allowance - which, she reflected, she should probably have done anyway, seeing as he didn't do anything to deserve that which he had - backed up with a stare of her own; although her stare was nothing compared to that of Fluttershy's, she had the power to back it up. He'd withdrawn, backing away nervously before turning and fleeing at a full gallop.

After a few minutes' cooldown time, she'd gone to the refrigerator and gotten herself a glass of Sunny Delight. The orange-flavored beverage had caught her eye with it's name, but the taste was what had hooked her. She'd had lots of it imported. It was certainly popular, and not just with her.

She'd gone and apologized to the Prince, though she had, in no uncertain terms, confirmed her earlier decision. He hadn't been happy about that, but he wasn't stupid; stuck up, pompous, and generally disdainful of the lower classes, but not - quite - stupid.

After a day of such madness, she was ready to do something fun. She could have definitely done something like a hooficure or gone to a fancy restaurant; there was never a lack of either in Canterlot. However, right now, she didn't really feel like going out.

"Ah, Snowfire and Flametail, just the ponies I wanted to see," she said to two Guards approaching her.

"You sent for us, your Highness?" the white earth pony asked.

"I did. And you know you don't have to be so formal," she answered. "I've called you two because I feel like starting a party."

The two brothers nodded. They knew what she meant by that. "I suppose today wasn't exactly a good one?" Flametail asked.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you how bad it was," she replied to the bright orange unicorn.

She used her magic to open the door to her room. All three of them followed her to a large monitor on a small bureau.

"Which one will we be playing, your.... I mean... Princess?"

Celestia's eye rolled over the collection of games she kept. While not as avid a gamer as her younger sister, she still liked having them as an option. She disliked the taste of alcoholic beverages; after her first glass of wine, she'd never had another, and she'd never tried any kind of tobacco. While gaming sometimes caused rage, it wasn't the out-of-control, amnesiac kind of rage that beer or whiskey would have brought. Not that she had that much trouble with anger, but today had proven that even she had limits.

"I think a good game of Halo Wars would help," she said at last.

"That means we'll have to go home in order to play," Snowfire noted.

"That's fine; we'll be able to communicate via headsets." She sat down, using magic to turn on the set and the Xbox.

"I'll get us home before you know it, Princess," Flametail said. In a flash of orange light, he and Snowfire vanished.

Celestia chuckled. She knew that Snowfire didn't like it when his brother pulled off a stunt like that; likely, the brothers would be spending the next couple minutes arguing before going to their Xboxes and playing the game.

They were both loyal and brave soldiers. Flametail was the elder of the two, but not by much. Both had fought bravely during the Changeling invasion, though they, like the rest of the Royal Guard, had been taken by surprise and overwhelmed. Both felt the sting of defeat, and were determined to prevent it from happening again. Oddly enough, or so she thought, it was Flametail who was the outgoing, boisterous type, and had to be reined in by his younger brother.

Once they were both on, she invited them to a party.

"Can't believe we're hanging out with the Princess," she heard Flametail say.

"We work with her all the time," Snowfire said, as if to somepony younger. "We know her."

"Yeah, but we've never spent time with her like this."

"She's too pure; of course we haven't."

Celestia mentally snorted. Most ponies thought the same, that she was somehow superior to them in a way beyond rank and royalty. Few thought of her as being just like them; as a pony with dreams, feelings, disappointments and successes. It could be grating sometimes.

At least they love me, almost without exception. That was something that sometimes rose to her mind when she started to fall into such thoughts. Luna had been thought of as Nightmare Moon for a thousand years; as the monster, nay, the creator of nightmares. Some ponies were starting to come around, but some wasn't all. In general, Ponyville and somewhat over half of Canterlot liked her; the rest held their opinions carefully in reserve, most afraid that if they voiced their concerns, they would suffer nightmares the rest of their days. Celestia had to admit, as far as suffering went, her sister suffered far more.

She'd tried to get others to believe in Luna's good side, as they believed in hers. But a thousand years' worth of tales and obscurity had a grip that she had so far been unable to loosen very far.

If only it were possible to issue a book barbeque, as it is in Tropico. She'd watched let's plays of that, and the many antics, especially those initiated by Penultimo, were very funny. Nonetheless, many if not most of Luna's biggest supporters were humans. Luna had been shocked, though pleasantly so, when she learned of the fact that she was beloved by the show's fans. Celestia had pondered this fact for a while, and had then come to the conclusion that, because they were outsiders looking in, they were more willing to forgive her sister for her actions as Nightmare Moon and accept as Luna, Princess of Equestria.

"Who should we play as, Princess?" Snowfire asked.

"I will be playing as the Prophet of Regret," Celestia answered. She liked using the Prophet, not just because he could fly, but because his special power, the cleansing beam. In effect, the power of the sun was released on earth.

Snowfire chose the Arbiter, while Flametail favored the Brute Chieftain. "Why the name Stonewall, Flametail?" she asked.

"Because during a battle in the human civil war, one of their generals turned into a stone wall to defeat his enemies*. I wish I had powers like that."

It was all Celestia could do not to laugh. While not an expert on human conflicts, she seriously doubted that something like that had happened. Humans had no access to magic, not as unicorns and alicorns did.

"Hopefully, we can find a good match up," she said quietly, more to herself than to anyone else.

"Whoever they are, Princess, we'll crush them," Flametail said confidently.

Leon waited as the map opened on Frozen Valley. His first concern was sending his Warthog to grab some crates near his initial base. He queued up a supply pad, as well as a reactor and two more supply pads after that, as well as an additional Warthog.

"Okay guys, what're we gonna do?" Eddy asked.

"The usual; win," Leon answered.

That startled a laugh out of the Briton. "I mean as a plan to win," he said, "like the details."

"All three of them are Covenant," Leon noted. "D-bombs are going to be crucial. And we shoud have tons of Wolverines, because even if the Prophet doesn't start buzzing around blowing up bases while we're not looking, some other guy is going to go Banshees; you know they will. And as UNSC, our anti-infantry sucks, so we'll be relying on tanks and air power."

"Hmm," Luna hummed in thought. "We are some distance apart. I don't like having to run units to one area only to be attacked in the place I just left, which, if they are at all competent, they will be doing." After a moment of silence, she said quietly, as though to herself, "Unless..."

"Unless what?" Leon prompted.

"Unless we decide to play a super turtle."

That gave Leon pause. They hadn't tried to play any version of those for a while. Basically, the whole idea was to build an impenetrable defense and maintain it, with attacking, except in an effort to rank up leaders, being prohibited. The idea was that the enemy would eventually get tired of futile attacks and resign. The problem was, even if the turtle was set up properly, some people were stubborn and willing to be bloody minded; a super turtle game could potentially last for hours.

The best map by far on which to play a super turtle was, by far, Fort Deen. Ground forces were limited by the pathways on the map, allowing for a defense based on a predictable attack route. And Luna was right; the bases on Frozen Valley started far apart. It would take units moving from one side of the map to the other about a minute to cross the distance, which meant that a clever enemy could launch a diversionary assault against one side and then, once the defending players had sent units there, attack on the other. It would be difficult to build a proper conventional defense against such a strategy.

That is, if one thought conventionally.

"That means going for the Bermuda Triangle," Ed put in.

Leon nodded, though he knew none of the others could see it. The Bermuda Triangle was a super turtle that was designed for Frozen Valley. Essentially, the players would take a base from the triangular setup of bases on one side of their area of the map, after naturally killing the rebel bases there, and then ignore their initial bases (except, of course, for the player who started in that area) while building up all their strength in that one place. It allowed for easy reinforcement, and there were only two vectors from which the enemy could attack on the ground. While enemy air power could be an issue, the idea was that enough anti-air would be built to handle the problem. Meanwhile, massed cobras would slaughter any vehicle sent to break the defenders, up to an including Scarabs.

The main problem was building an economy. The lack of other bases meant that money wasn't going to be coming in massive amounts. Rebuilding units and using leader powers would be crucial; between that and upgrading units, resources would be scarce.

Then again, wasn't it a challenge? Just the sort of excitement he and the others were looking for?

"I guess we could try it," he said.

"Like you have a choice in the matter; I'm an absolute monarch, so you'll do what I say," Luna said in a cheeky tone; he could easily imagine her smiling in amusement.

"Well, with that kind of persuasion, I guess I have no real options," he replied, with a hint of amusement in his tone.

Luna made a neighing sound, one sounding as usual as that of a normal horse. To the surprised silence, she added a few seconds later, "What? You never thought I would stoop to using that kind of speech, did you?"

"No, honestly didn't," Eddy said. "What did you say, exactly?"

"Oh, nothing. Neighs and whinnies mean nothing by themselves; ponies usually make those noises when caught by surprise or as a replacement for a sigh. I was just using it as a reference to the whole 'yay or nay' thing."

"So..."

"No, you don't get a choice, as I told you thirty seconds ago." Luna laughed, though not unkindly.

"Okay, I guess super turtle it is," Leon agreed.

Celestia queued up a couple warehouses and a temple as the game started. After sending her Ghost to pick up resources, she started to formulate her strategy. She didn't know what the opposing team would do. However, after looking at the teams, she began to nod. The enemy team was formed entirely out of UNSC leaders... all of the UNSC leaders, in fact. That meant, if they were quick, her team could rush the enemy team and win a quick victory. It would be a triumphant end to a bad day.

"I think it might be a good idea to him them as soon as possible," she said. "Snowfire, build us some Suicide Grunts. Flametail, get us Brutes, lots of them."

"You got it, Princess," Snowfire said eagerly.

"Who do we hit first?" Flametail asked. "Or do we hit all three of them?"

Celestia thought for a moment. "Better to concentrate against one of them," she said at last. She pinged the radar on top of the orange player's base. "We'll hit this one first."

It would all come down to the leaders, and whatever cheap units they could produce quickly. She waited for the Prophet to roll out, then sent him towards the other side of the map. She queued up a Factory, the Covenant's vehicle producer. She was going to mass-build Wraiths. True, without upgrades they weren't nearly as good as Scorpions - actually, few units in the game were as good as Scorpions, and even fully upgraded the Wraith came nowhere close to it's UNSC counterpart - but they were better than Warthogs, which had only machine guns early on as an upgrade, and the grenade launcher upgrade after the machine gun wasn't very scary either. Only a Gauss Hog was going to do much damage to a Wraith, and their armor was still basically made of paper, and while a Scorpion could outfight a Wraith even without upgrades, the cost was 500 for a Scorpion vs. 350 for a Wraith, so the latter could outnumber the former.

The Covenant could warp units directly to their leaders. A Disruption Bomb could stop it, but it cost 450 resources, which was quite damaging early on. The enemy had the choice of building more units or using resources to stop a leader from warping in reinforcements, and other leaders had the option of standing out of range of the D-bomb to warp in their own units.

Celestia first chose to upgrade her Prophet to have Fuel Rod Cannons. The starting plasma cannons were awful. The main problem when switching was that, due to a glitch in the game, the Prophet's shields would automatically reduce to about a third or fourth of it's normal strength if the upgrade was completed while the Prophet was under attack. It was annoying, but the upgrade was worth it. She could upgrade the Cleansing Beam instead, but using that cost resources, and she wanted to try having more units than the enemy.

"All of you, move up your leaders to the Prophet's position," she instructed.

"Whatcha got in mind, Princess?" Flametail asked, no doubt eager to start.

Celestia smiled. "I want to overwhelm them... with the power of the sun."

Leon built up his Warthog squad; so far he was up to five, and he was building a Barracks to train Spartans. He wasn't intending to go infantry, but he had to have Spartans and upgrade them. His intention was to go tanks; people generally expected Anders to go air. While eventually building some Hawks was always good, if for nothing else than for having well-armed, fast-moving scouts, tanks were okay to begin with.

In the meantime, Warthogs and Spartans we good enough to start out with. He sent his Warthogs to the red Covenant base to check on what that player was doing. when his units got there, they ran into four units of Brutes. With only machine guns and a ramming ability - good enough in any other Halo game - it wasn't enough to ensure a victory in the skirmish, or at least he didn't want to lose any units right now. He withdrew them. He did manage to get a look at the enemy base; so far, four Warehouses and a Temple. That was interesting. That meant that Red wasn't up to building the usual Hunter or Banshee force. And, with the Brute squads he'd encountered...

"Red's going to rush," he announced.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah Ed; he's mass-building Brutes."

"That's kind of obvious; what rank is he?" Luna asked.

Leon looked. "Oh, you've got to be kidding me!"

"What!?"

"Two of these guys are Recruits."

"Are you serious?" Luna demanded.

"Yeah; Red and Blue. The last guy, Purple, is a Brigadier, so I guess we'll have to watch out for that, though."

"How did they even get in a match with us?" Eddy asked, though not derisively.

"Blame Matchmaker, as usual," Leon suggested. "As stupid here as it is in World of Tanks."

"Even better," Luna said, in a tone that made it obvious she was grinning. "The more fodder for our super turtle."

"That's if these aren't alt accounts," Leon tacked on.

"Urrrg," Eddy said discomfortingly. "Hope that isn't the case."

"You can take this base, Leon," Luna said, pinging the map. "I've cleared out the Rebels."

"Thanks!" Leon claimed the base site, and immediately a base began constructing. Leon frowned. He liked strategy games where the base wasn't so centered on one site, and where one could build a structure wherever they pleased. Halo Wars was pretty limited there. If other factions had been put into the game - such as the Rebels and Forerunners - it might have been less of a bother for him.

Oh well.

He sent his newly-trained Spartans to take out a rebel base. They had enough shielding to get through a turret's fire, and enough to kill off the rebel infantry.

"At least it wasn't another MAC rush," Leon sighed.

"Yeah; for some reason they always blow up my base," Eddy noted angrily. Leon decided it wasn't the best time to say that once, he'd messaged a player on an all-Cutter team to hit him with MACs.

"Oh bother," Luna said worriedly.

"What?"

"I can see all their leaders... who are all on course for my base."

"Aw nuts," Leon grumbled. He sent all his existing units toward Luna's base. On the minimap, he could see that Eddy was doing just the same.

Celestia felt a measure of satisfaction as Regret's Fuel Rod Cannons began pounding the orange player's Supply Pad. She upgraded his Cleansing Beam and would use it once the upgrade was complete. So far, she had two Wraiths out, with another one on the way.

Snowfire was a little over-enthusiastic. "Feel my rage!" he shouted as he ignited his energy swords and starting jumping into the base. Celestia could barely suppress a giggle; the Arbiter's Rage Mode attacks looked funny.

Flametail didn't bother with special attacks. He just started whacking a Barracks he found with his Gravity Hammer. His Brutes started warping in a moment later, and they started pounding the base as well.

She would have sent in her own units, but the blue player on the opposing team provided her with a problem straight off; he sent his Warthogs to harass her Prophet. When she turned to shoot at them, the Warthogs dodged her Fuel Rods and continued firing unending bursts of machine gun fire, which were wearing down the Prophet's shields. She lashed out with the Cleansing Beam; the heavily armed trucks simply moved to avoid it. They simply moved too fast and too unpredictably for the beam to do any more than lightly damage any one of them.

She quickly sent her Wraiths to warp onto her Prophet. They came quickly, and she ordered them to destroy the Warthogs. The blue player, sensing trouble, moved them back, out of her line of sight.

It was a victory, of sorts. She refocused on the base and unleashed the Cleansing Beam upon the Supply Pad. Although a fully upgraded beam would have done more damage and been much more economically efficient, it got the job done; the pad started burning quickly.

Meanwhile, Snowfury had run out of money using rage attacks against the main structure and was now trying to batter down a second Supply Pad.

"Snowfury, remember that you're building Suicide Grunts," Celestia reminded him.

"Oh, right." A few seconds later, Suicide Grunts began warping in. They fired their plasma pistols; Snowfire had sent them to attack the Reactor.

"Don't use them like that!" Flametail said loudly.

"What else would you have them do?" Snowfire countered.

"Oh, I don't know... use their suicide ability?"

"But that would waste the resources I used to build them! Plus, who sends their own guys to kill themselves?"

"It would do more damage than hitting it with their peashooters!"

Snowfire digested this, then sent a single Suicide Grunt to perform it's special ability. The tanks on their backs glowed bright blue as they ran into the Reactor and exploded, severely damaging the building. The white Guard grunted, refusing to say anything, but acknowledging the point. A moment later, he sent the rest of his Grunts to kamikaze themselves against the Reactor, finally succeeding in blowing it up.

Celestia smiled. That put the opposing player at a serious tech disadvantage. With any luck, this might just succeed.

Leon succeeded in saving his Warthogs from the Covenant, but Luna's base was being pounded; not pounded very well, but pounded. She had lost her Reactor, and with it any ability to build anything other than Warthogs.

"Could one of you please do something?" the Lunar Princess shouted.

"Hold on." Leon targeted the Prophet with the Cryo Bomb, freezing him and two of the Wraiths with him. Eddy unleashed Forge's Carpet Bomb on Red's Brutes; although it wasn't upgraded, it did enough damage to hurt them pretty badly. Luna took the opportunity to pound the Prophet with a MAC round. It didn't kill him, but his recharged shields got taken down quite a bit. Leon's Warthogs went back in, chewing up the rest of the shield and finally starting to do real damage.

On top of it all, Eddy dropped a D-bomb on top of him.

The tide was turning.

Celestia's usual smile slipped as the Prophet got hounded by the enemy forces. The massive use of UNSC leader powers wasn't something she'd expected. She watched as the Warthogs, now with Grenade Launchers, fired on her leader.

"Hey, what the...! Why can't I rage?" Snowfire asked, confused.

"They dropped a Disruption Bomb!" Flametail exclaimed. "My Brutes aren't warping in anymore! Wait, what are those?"

"Flamethrowers!"

Celestia watched as they went straight for the Arbiter. "Snowfire, get out of there!"

"It won't let me! Aw nuts, here they come!"

The flamethrower marines doused the Arbiter in flames. Although he was fighting back, he was obviously doomed.

"I'll save you, buddy!" Flametail said, moving his Chieftain to attack the Flamers.

He might have done it... if three Spartan tanks hadn't chugged on down and blasted the Chieftain with their cannons. At that point, the Solar Princess realized that all hopes of a successful rush were gone. "Pull back, now! That's an order!"

It was too late. Snowfire's Arbiter, unable to rage, was cooked alive in his armor; although Flamtetail's Chieftain held on for a while longer, he too was defeated before he could pull out of range of the D-bomb.

Celestia sent her two surviving Wraiths to attack the Scorpions while her Prophet made his escape, hoping she would be able to get him out of there and formulate a new plan.

"Get him, get him, get him!" Leon shouted, but it was too late; the Prophet floated between the two Wraiths and safely teleported away. "Nuts!" he said as slammed his fist down on the arm of his chair.

"Ah. don't get your knickers in a twist," Eddy said. "We got two of them, and now all that's left is to mop up."

"Easy for you to say," Luna grumbled, but Leon could tell she was grateful that her base hadn't been destroyed.

"What do we do now, chaps?" Ed asked.

"We continue with our plan, as before," Luna answered him. "We can still bring this off."

"Alright." Still... Leon sent his tanks and Warthogs toward Red's base. Nothing stops me from going and doing the same to them.

"What are doing?" Luna asked him. "Don't go and kill one of them yet!"

"I won't," he said. "Just going to blow up every building on his base."

Flametail wiped his brow with a hard, heavy hoof, which still had nail holes from the horseshoes he'd worn when training. "Well, that didn't go as we wanted."

"You think?" Snowfire countered.

"We gave them a bit to think about."

"We didn't do anything to their units; I think we should be worried."

"Oh please, little brother, you don't really think they'd be fool enough to come up here and..."

A blue Spartan tank, followed by two others and a small pack of Warthogs, rolled up on his base and blasted a warehouse with canister shells.

"Uh, Snow, please forget what I just said; I think I need help."

"I'm still building new units, I'm not sure I can do anything."

Flametail watched in horror as the tanks blew up two of his warehouses, then targeted his Temple. A MAC blast damaged it to the point where the tanks were able to kill it; they promptly blew up his remaining warehouses.

"Princess? Snow? Could either of you please send help?" he asked, panicking now.

Just then, the tanks began moving off. They still fired at his base as they moved off, but they stopped once they got out of range. The quickly left, retreating back toward their side of the map.

"What the heck just happened?"

"I don't know," Celestia answered. "I thought they had you."

"This has to be some part of their strategy; we're dealing with a superior intellect."

Snowfire laughed. "Somehow I doubt that, big brother. I don't profess to understand it either, though."

"What if they come back and do it again?" Flametail asked, suddenly worried again.

"We should have units of our own. Just focus on rebuilding your base."

"Right." Flametail looked at his resources. "Uh, Snow, would you mind giving me a few hundred bits?"

"That's how you wreck a base," Leon said as his tanks reached his own base inside the triangle.

"And it will mess up their resource collection," Luna noted, "and they'll have to donate resources to the player you just hit."

"Wasn't thinking about that," he admitted. "Just wanted to show them how you really smash things up; I mean come on, the Arbiter was raging on the main building on a UNSC base, for crying out loud!"

"They are new at this," Luna agreed. "What happens when they eventually get it in their heads to build six scarabs? That's my worry."

"Uh... we die?" Eddy suggested.

"That will be hard to stop," Leon reluctantly agreed. "But we can't just give up at that point. Besides, anyone who sees six Scarabs fail is bound to assume he can't win and quit."

Eddy laughed. "Yeah, that might be so. So let's do it."

Leon went about setting up the super turtle; he placed Cobras in a line (he refused to try to Vulcan them, i.e. drop them on top of each other with Pelicans; he saw that as using a glitch, which would be against the rules) and built the necessary Reactors on his base, upgrading them as necessary. His army, comprised of the stationed Cobras and a core of tanks and a handful of Wolverines, was ready for action; although not yet fully upgraded, it was a force capable to inflicting severe damage on anyone willing to engage it.

Luna's army consisted of a similar set up, but without so many Cobras, and more Wolverines. Edward, playing Forge, built a large squad of Cyclopes, along with Grizzly tanks and a very large force of Wolverines, along with a handful of Spartan tanks.

The main weakness of this force was that it had a lack of aerial firepower. However, considering air units were generally offensive units, used for raiding the enemy and destroying bases, they weren't very useful, and, given the number of anti air defenses by the defenders, unnecessary. The Cobras and tanks could kill Scarabs, though admittedly not without cost, and only someone who went nuts building and maintaining a massive force of Banshees could hope to break through the anti air defense and do any damage. A lesser weakness was the fact that Hunters could and probably would do great damage to a vehicular force, but Hunters weren't as strong as they were in other Halo games, and Leon wasn't as afraid of them as he was in the FPS versions of Halo.

They did have a few scattered air units, but only a handful. It would have to do.

"I hope they don't go for Hunters too much," Luna said, as though reading his thoughts. "They might be hard to counter."

"Hunters in this are terrible, compared to the walking tanks of Halo, Halo 2, and others," Ed countered. "They can't even shoot at air units, for crying out loud."

"Base under attack," came the notification.

Leon looked to his original base. He nodded. "It has begun."

Snowfire looked at his army with satisfaction. It was a massive army of Suicide Grunts and Hunters to back them up. Although he only had access to tech level 2 units and upgrades, he felt it was good enough to get the job done, especially with his teammates to help him.

"Are we agreed?" Celestia asked.

"Yeah. Blue was the guy who did the most to mess up our plan. He has to die first," Snowfire said, stamping his hoof on the ground for emphasis.

"Alright. If you're both ready, then let's go."

Their army began to move. Flametail's red Banshees moved at their normal speed, in order to keep up with the ground forces. Celestia had an army of Jackals and Hunters, as lethal combination, along with a small number of Vampires, in case they encountered aerial units. All in all, it appeared to be an unstoppable force.

Blue's base came into view quite soon. "Attack!" Celestia ordered.

Hunters and Banshees started pounding at the base and it's buildings. It was the start of their offensive.

Leon sent his two Hornets and his Wolverines to defend his base. He didn't expect the force to stop it's destruction, but that wasn't the point of the exercise. His goal was to knock down as many of the enemy's units as he could, hopefully give some of his units some stars that would make them all the more valuable. The Hornets weren't going to accomplish much on their own, but if he managed to kill the Vampires, the only units able to shoot at them would be Banshees and Jackals, neither of which were particularly threatening to air units.

"I hope you know what you're doing," Luna said as she noticed the movment.

"I think I do."

The enemy managed to destroy two Supply Pads before his units showed up. His first targets were the Purple Vampires. Two of them were hacked out of the sky before the other player realized what was going on and drew them back. After that, he sent the Hornets to attack a unit of Hunters.

The Red player lost a couple Banshees before he noticed. Leon was worried he might attack his Wolverines - or worse, call in his buddy who had the Hunters - but that didn't happen. Instead, Red just flew them to the other side of the base by using the Boost ability.

Of course, that didn't remove the threat to his units. The enemy Blue player sent his Arbiter to attack the Wolverines. Leon moved them, though he tried to keep them in a position where they could bear on the Banshees. However, it was going to be difficult, as the pathway around the base was crowded in by cliff walls, allowing only a few units to pass at once. And if the enemy managed to seal them in by send units to block those passageways...

No, it was too risky to try to pursue the Banshees too far. He settled for having his Wolverines Volley the group of Hunters. A massive barrage of missiles flew from his units and struck the enemy, damaging several and even killing one of them.

By now, his base had lost most of it's buildings, and the central building was reduced to half health.

A group of Hunters detached from the main group and attacked his Wolverines. At that point, he decided it wasn't a good idea to stick around much longer. He'd done what he'd wanted to do, which was bleed the enemy at no cost to his own army. He retreated, although a couple units had suffered damage. It was all part of the game.

He allowed the enemy to whittle down his base until it finally blew up. Likely, the enemy thought they'd won a big victory. Well, they were to discover otherwise soon enough.

Next, they moved on to Eddy's base. The British player didn't even bother responding, choosing instead to kill a rebel base.

The first notion the enemy team had that they were facing something more than they were expecting was when two Red Wraiths were blown sky high on running into the Cobra line. A group of Hunters following them were first volleyed, then hosed down by the defenders' air units. A group of Banshees trying to help was wiped out, one by one.

Edward moved his Cyclops force to repair the damaged vehicles. Altogether, a full on UNSC super turtle was harder to pull off, as compared to a mixed team of UNSC and Covenant. However, the assault force was getting decimated. Blue and Purple retreated; Red tried, without success, to punch a hole with Banshees. All of the Covenant air units were shot down, at the cost of one Cobra and a Wolverine, plus some damaged units.

These guys have no idea what we're going to do to them, he thought deliciously.

Defeat didn't feel as good as victory. That was the first thought Celestia had as her team retreated. Or, rather, as her army and Snowfire's retreated. Flametail seemed to think his Banshees would be enough to win, and seemed to be surprised that they were not.

"Well, it's not like they can do much, huddled up in that corner of the map," Snowfire said, which sounded logical. "We just have to keep them there, and attack all together when we go in, that's all."

That was the way Celestia saw it as well. All in all, it would be a siege, but with the enemy having only one base each, she was confident of victory.

She rebuilt the forces she had lost, and made sure to take a base in the interval. Flametail built an army of Wraiths, discarding Banshees for the time being. Snowfire expanded to another base, as did his older brother.

When the went in again, they hit from both sides. Flametail's Wraiths were obliterated by Cobras long before they could do significant damage, and Snowfire lost most of his Suicide Grunts. Those who survived succeeding in blowing up an Orange Supply Pad, but even as the last Grunt blew himself up, the enemy player started to rebuild it. Celestia lost most of her hunters to canister shells and her Jackals were unable to do much to the defending vehicles without them. They withdrew, having lost a large number of units.

By now, she'd researched most of the available technologies, and most of the base slots on the map were filled in. Her team would have a massive amount of money coming in. Compared to that of their opponents, she didn't see how their idea of sitting in a corner was supposed to work. Without the resources of her own team, they could barely be expected to replace their own losses, let alone expand further.

"Ready to go in again, Princess," Flametail reported.

She needed, though she knew intellectually that he couldn't see it. "Very good. Send your armies against the northern line of their defenses." She quickly moved her units to do the same.

Hopefully, this attack would do what the others had not.

Luna made sure to turn of her mic before snarling. The other team had come loaded for bear, with more Hunters than their tanks could deal with. The Cobras weren't going to last long.

"Oh for heaven's sake," she said as a Cobra was vaporized by multiple Hunter assault cannons.

It was a lesson; never super turtle without adequate air units. She resolved never to make that mistake again.

She did what she could; her Wolverines Volleyed the Hunter group, damaging several of them. On top of that, she delivered four MAC blasts down on top of them. It wasn't enough to get all of them, but it severely reduced the firepower the other side had available.

Banshees streamed down, attacking the Cobras as well. This time, she grinned a little. This Red player clearly had a thick skull.

Or maybe he didn't. Maybe he was just bloody-minded. Whatever the case, the Banshees stayed to kill a number of Cobras before finally being shot down. To her dismay, Red had researched Sacrifice, so his Banshees would crash into the force of Cobras and Tanks sent against them when they died. That knocked out a few more units.

And after that wave, another force of Hunters, colored Purple this time, went in after the ruin of the armies that had preceded them. Most of the remaining Cobras were eliminated. They were good against vehicles, including Scarabs, but Cobras were useless against Hunters.

This time, Leon came to the rescue. he dropped a Cryo Bomb on top of them, stopping their advance immediately and allowing for the tanks to redistribute some fury against the attackers. Edward mopped up with a Carpet Bomb, obliterating most of the remaining units. Sullenly, reluctantly, the enemy withdrew it's few remaining troops from the battlefield.

"Phew," Leon sighed. "They must have left, what? Thirty, forty units dead in this failed charge alone."

"We haven't lost much less than that ourselves," Luna answered, looking nervously at the number of available resources. "It was a clever attack, making us expend most of our effort on the first couple of waves. Maybe they're brighter than we thought."

"Or maybe their Brigadier is their only source of brains," Leon commented dully. "They lost more than we did... even if I have to rebuild all that junk they destroyed."

She mentally thanked him for not swearing, although she knew he wouldn't hear it. "We'll have to rebuild. And we should build more air this time."

"Can't leave ourselves vulnerable to Scarabs."

"It wouldn't do for those Hunters to tear up the Cobras for the Scarab to push through," Luna countered. She took a moment to think about Leon's tactics. In most strategy games he concentrated on building a powerful ground force, with air units being given second priority... or no priority altogether. In Supreme Commander 2, he loved to build and upgrade massive numbers of Rockhead tanks, which were worth their weight in gold once fully upgraded, with artillery, shield, and anti-missile units backing them up. His fighter and bomber support though, was typically minimal, or nil. He also loved to build a big navy, even more so than an army, but most maps focused on land and air combat.

She wondered whether he was afraid of heights in the real world. As a pony with wings, she sometimes had difficultly wondering why anyone would be afraid of that. Other times, she reminded herself that two-thirds of all ponies, or as close to that as made little or no difference, had no wings whatsoever. She could also remember a time as a filly before she had learned to fly. Back then, she'd been as afraid of falling as any other pony.

In any case, Leon's tactics were intensely ground-based. In Halo Wars, that was typically fine for a UNSC player if they harnessed tanks with Wolverines. However, that tactic only went so far. A Banshee squadron could easily slip by such an army to raid a base a long distance from it, and an invisible Arbiter could summon reinforcement from anywhere, as could the Chieftain and Prophet. While the UNSC was good at blitzkrieg-style assaults, the Covenant could bypass defenses and attack where you least expected it... or wanted it.

Luna decided that she would be the one to build air, as she had less issue with the unit types. As she moved to do so, she wondered when the enemy would get the idea to build Scarabs...

Celestia looked at the ruins of the army that had been sent in. All the Banshees were down, and the majority of the Hunters had been wiped out; most of those remaining were down to red health.

The tactic had almost worked. The problem had been the leader powers. They needed something that could bull through such a blow, and then keep going once the problem had passed. And for that, they needed...

"Flametail, Snowfire, how much money do you have?"

"About four thousand and a half."

"Three thousand and seven."

"Good. Build a Scarab, each of you. I'll do the same." She immediately queued one up at her main base.

"Wow, why didn't we think of that?"

"Because we thought this was going to be easy," Snowfire answered his brother. "We found out it isn't. And if the only unit you ever build is a Scarab, it leaves you with precious little to protect your base."

"Point taken."

"With these," Celestia added, "we can attack them from that mountain, or plateau." She pinged the map on the area she was talking about.

"So one Scarab per attack route?"

"Yes, we should do that."

"Going to take a few minutes," Flametail worried. "If they go and hit one of our bases..."

"Then they do," Snowfire said. "Besides, that will leave their own bases weak for our own attack. I say let them."

"Anybody want to hit these guys while their trousers are down?" Eddy asked.

"Don't be a fool," Luna scorned, at the same time Leon said, "No!" Luna went on, "That would throw away the whole idea of wearing them out."

"Not tryin' to break the super turtle, just want to get a little more veterancy."

"No," Luna said firmly. "We're staying here."

"And what will you do to me if I don't? Throw me in jail?"

"No, but I can MAC you," the Lunar Princess threatened.

"Um... guys?" Leon said.

"Yes?"

"They have a Scarab up there," Leon said, pining the map where the Scarab was perched. It began shooting at his base.

"Hold on," Luna said, lining up a MAC. The Scarab was blasted by four massive shells from space. It wasn't destroyed, but it was heavily damaged. Leon's tanks rolled up and blasted it with canister shells. Even so, the narrow space between the ledge and the base allowed for only a few tanks to get at it at once, so it managed to fully melt a turret, a Factory, and a Supply Pad before finally blowing up.

"Two more! One on either side!" Eddy announced.

Cobras were already firing upon the threat. The Scarabs were both taking heavy damage, but both were able to stop and fire.

Leon called in a Cryo Bomb on the one attacking from the north, freezing it in place as Cobras and tanks tore it apart. Ed's own Carpet Bomb on the other Scarab wasn't as effective. The few remaining Hunters the other side had joined the battle as well, but obviously the wave would be made or broken by the performance of it's Scarabs.

The one in the north died quickly to fire from ground units and Luna's new Hornets. The one attacking from the other side was still putting up a fight. However, even as the Cobras on that side died, they perforated the Scarab, heavily damaging it in the process. When Luna's air units arrived, the obliterated the Scarab with little trouble. Then they finished off the few Hunters still standing.

"That was... interesting," Luna commented. "I wonder if...?"

"Well, that decides it," Celestia sighed. "We must build two Scarabs each, and send those in to finish them. Build one each in a separate base; that way, they'll be built simultaneously."

"Hopefully it works," Snowfire said quietly.

"Of course it will work!" Flametail said confidently. "Six Scarabs has to be unstoppable!"

"They stopped us just now."

"We weren't using six Scarabs, were we?"

"Well, no," Snowfire admitted. "Can't really say this match has been successful, though, can we? All that's happened is that they've been chewing us up and spitting us out; somehow that little nut of resistance has done more than any of us thought it would."

"If you hit an anvil long enough with a hammer, it'll break," Flametail argued.

"Yeah, but it's the hammer that will break, not the anvil. Our grandfather's a blacksmith in the Guard. You ought to know that."

"Are you saying you're a defeatist?"

"No! Where did you get that? All I was saying was that this isn't going to be easy."

"Please stop it, both of you," Celestia said firmly. Some might have considered it odd, but she viewed the Royal Guard more as children than as her protectors. Sometimes, like children, they needed discipline. Regardless, she liked the brothers, who were competent at their posts, and they were generally friendly, a good quality to have in her eyes. "If this goes well, we'll win," she reasoned. "We'll try the same thing again; two Scarabs on the mountain, two others each attacking on the paths to either side. "And we'll build some Engineers to fix them in the battle. It should work." At least, she hoped it would.

Leon wiped his brow as the last Scarab died. "That was too close."

"Oh, come on, mate, they didn't even destroy all that much."

"They did get further than I would have been comfortable with, though," Luna admitted. "If they come at us again with even more, I am not sure if we would be able to stop them."

"We have to rebuild," Leon said. "More Cobras."

"Cobras are too stationary," Luna argued. "We need Vultures. You should have built more Hawks by now."

"Hawks don't do as much damage, and they get chewed up real bad."

"At least they can move faster! And they don't have to become a stationary fortress just to do any amount of damage!"

Leon had to admit that she had a point. "Fine. I'll do Hawks. Happy?"

"More so than before."

"Yeah, sorry."

"That's alright. Let's focus more on the enemy than on each other."

He was about to go to work on that when a potential problem came to his attention. "Uh, what if they bring Vampires instead of Engineers or Hunters in support?"

"Ouch," Luna winced. "That would hurt. Still, I think there is no reason to assume they would do that. I'm willing to gamble that they'll go with Engineers."

"Not all that much better," Eddy noted. "They still make the Scarabs hard to kill."

"When they come, have your Wolverines concentrate on them rather than the Scarab," the Lunar Princess advised. "Without a doubt, we'll end up expending our leader powers. The coming contest of arms will be decided by units."

The following several minutes were spent in quiet reconstruction. Leon did indeed replace some of his dead Cobras with Hawks, but likely not as many as Luna would have wanted. Well, it was his army, not hers. He replaced the buildings the Scarab had destroyed, as well as switching his turrets from flame and missile-based upgrades to railguns. Likely, the turrets themselves would do little to stop the coming attack, but it would be something piling damage onto the enemy, so it was worth doing. He carefully set up his Cobras on likely avenues of attack; he placed a couple next to his base, rather than in a line across one of the two paths. The monstrous mechanical beasts would be looking to obliterate bases rather than units, if the enemy commanders were smart. They hadn't proved the brightest bunch, or maybe they were just noobs. Either way, he'd faced other matches that had been harder.

Still, the current situation wasn't going to be easy, and was all too likely to be close.

Leon leaned back in his chair and stretched. It was getting close to an hour or so, and the fighting had been intense.

"Been exciting, hasn't it?"

"Yeah, Ed, it has been," Leon said, yawning a little.

"Oh come now, it hasn't been more than an hour and you two are both getting tired! The night hasn't even come in it's fullest yet!"

"Well, we aren't exactly nocturnal, are we?" Ed asked rhetorically. "Have to go to either work or school in the morning, we do, depending on how old we are."

Luna sighed. "What I'm sure of is that both of you are missing out on the most beautiful time of the day."

Before either Leon or Edward could reply to that, a Purple icon appeared onscreen. "Look out, Prophet incoming," Leon warned.

Behind the Prophet, two Cyan Scarabs walked forward.

"Uh oh," Eddy murmured worriedly.

"Two more on the ridge!"

"And two more, from the other side!" Luna exclaimed.

Leon heard Cobras open fire, but his main attention was drawn to the two Scarabs on the ridge, which were both firing at his base.

"Luna, if I Cryo Bomb these Two Scarabs, can you blow up one with a MAC and kill the other with our combined air force?"

"I think I can," she answered. "Though if you had listened to me, you might be able to take on more of that fight yourself."

Leon grunted, but refused to concur. "Alright, here we go."

He sent in a Cryo Bomb; after both Scarabs were frozen solid, Luna blasted the one on the left (from Leon's perspective) to death while their air units battered away at the second. Frozen and unable to move, the second Scarab suffered badly under the barrage, but it did better than it otherwise might have, as ten Engineers began to repair it halfway through it's health bar.

"Aw... nuts..."

"I suppose we should have expected no less," Luna commented. "I'd feel a little better if this was the only enemy player doing this right now, but I noticed the other two also have Engineers floating around behind them."

Leon didn't really care. "Wolverine them to death, then."

"Will do."

Leon moved his own Wolverines up and hammered the Engineers. Three of them died before the owner of the Scarab noticed. Even then, the remainder were too slow to get out of the way in time; two more crashed to earth as the rest were bought out of range. The Scarab, once it had become unfrozen, turned it's attention to the anti-air vehicles.

"Uh oh."

Uh oh was right. A Wolverine's only weapon that could be readily used against ground targets was a weak grenade launcher. He did succeed in Volleying the Scarab, but the damage wasn't enough to kill it, and the mechanical beast was ripping through the anti-air units like a hot knife going through butter, and unfrozen butter, at that.

Missiles suddenly struck the monster from the air, blasting through the Scarab's remaining armor and allowing a few seconds further sustained fire to finally bring it down.

"You're lucky I kept a few Vultures in reserve," Luna said, a little teasingly.

"Alright, I get it; more air units next time," Leon said, feeling chastened.

"I should hope so."

"Uh, guys, a little help here?" Eddy demanded.

"Oops, sorry," Luna apologized.

Eddy's army was in shambles. Both Scarabs had survived, though one was severely damaged and down to red health. A single Cobra next to his base was still shooting, and a couple Cyclopes were pounding away at it's legs, but the rest of his forces had been melted by the beam cannons. His base was being systematically reduced.

Luna's Vultures quickly took care of the Scarab that was in the red, but she gave a little groan even as it fell. "The other two are attacking my base now," she said in a discomforted way. "Leon, if you could handle the remaining Scarab hitting Edward I would be grateful."

"Alright, but I think someone is going to lose a base."

She sighed. "I can't deny that, because that's how it looks to me. It looks as if I shall be the 'odd one out,' as it were."

Leon set his remaining units to assault the second Red Scarab, uprooting his surviving Cobras to help. "It happens to everyone, and a super turtle has a hard time avoiding it." He also queued up a couple Vultures of his own.

"I know, but I hate it when I'm the one who drew the short straw."

"Happens to all of us," Eddy said, sounding strained. "I almost got it as is. In fact, I'm still getting it."

"Trying to fix that." Leon planted his Cobras again, which started firing. Their upgraded cannons tore into the Scarab, but it was still a ways from dead. It continued to laser the buildings off Eddy's base; he had lost five buildings and most of his turrets. The sole surviving turret plucked away at the Scarab, barely doing any damage at all.

"Next time, I should probably upgrade those," the British player remarked sadly.

Regardless, the guns brought against it did finally tell on the Scarab, which tried to back away... but too late. It exploded spectacularly, then collapsed as it's legs gave out.

"Come on!" Leon said, again ordering his Cobras to unpack and move to Luna's aid.

She had put up as good a fight as could be expected. One Scarab was half dead, the other was at 75% health. However, her base was being sterilized of buildings, and her army wasn't going to be able to stop them on it's own.

Luckily, his own base had manufactured a few new units, including a Vulture. The Scarab closest to his units was blasted with fire; however, the players who had already lost their Scarabs sent their remaining Engineers to repair those of their teammates.

"Can't say they aren't persistent," Luna grumbled.

By now, the half dead Scarab was mostly dead. However, it continued to pluck away at Luna's base, despite the damage. The other was taking heavy fire from the side from Leon's units. Eddy's surviving units were hitting it as well. the damage was piling up.

Although Blue's Scarabs were taking deadly fire, he didn't bother moving them. They continued to laser down the main building, heedless of the gunfire and missiles striking them.

"Please don't die, please don't die, please don't... curse it!" Leon heard something thump over his headset as Luna's base began to explode. He didn't hear anymore; he supposed that she had turned off her mic in order to spare both of them from her anger. She turned it back on a few seconds later. "Well, I'm on the clock now," she said in a surprisingly calm voice.

"Move your units away," Leon said quickly. "Get them out of there." If a player lost their final base in the game, they would be set on a loss timer of about sixty seconds. If it ran out, or if all the player's units had been destroyed beforehand or were destroyed during that time, the player would lose. However, the base timer, which started after it's destruction, would allow Luna to rebuild her base twenty seconds after the base was destroyed... if at least one of her units survived until then.

"Got it." Luna was no fool, and moved one of her Hornets away; she kept the other units pounding away at the Scarab that was almost dead. It died a few seconds later, and the rage of the remaining defenders fell upon it's companion.

The last Scarab didn't try to run. Instead, it blazed away at it's enemies. It wasn't the smartest idea, even with Engineers hovering over it. Wolverines made short work of the Engineers, then added their grenade launchers to the mix. The Scarab never had a chance; it blew up just like the other five had.

Luna immediately reclaimed her base. All three of them sighed with relief as the base began construction. It had been a very narrow run.

Celestia watched as the last gargantuan war machine collapsed in ruins. "Well, that didn't go as planned."

She didn't hear from the other two for a moment, and wondered whether both of them had gone AFK. Then she realized that both Snowfire and Flametail were probably staring, awestruck, at the screen.

"...How is that possible?" Snowfire finally asked slowly. "Six Scarabs... gone..."

"They must have cheated," Flametail said. "That's the only way."

"They did not," Celestia said firmly. "They played fair, and beat us fairly."

"Sorry, Princess." There was a very loud growl.

"Um, what was that?"

"I think it was my stomach," Flametail answered. "I'm starving."

"Me too," Snowfire agreed. "This match has been going on for over an hour. It's close to dinner time."

Celestia couldn't deny that. She was starting to feel a little hungry herself. She couldn't help but suspect that the two Guards felt lucky they had an excuse to leave if they wanted. She couldn't blame them; the little enclave had taken everything she and her teammates had to throw at it.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Flametail said, "Sorry Princess, I'm going to fill my belly. See ya!" A moment later, his bases all exploded as he quit the game.

Snowfire didn't say anything. After a few seconds, his bases also started blowing up, and the message claiming he'd quit came up.

She couldn't help it; she laughed. The situation just called for it, despite that victory was now almost impossible. She felt no real anger toward the brothers for leaving they were probably lucky that they wouldn't get to see the results of the game. And, when all was said and done, it was, after all, just a game. The work they did in real life was competent, and both were likable, in fact almost impossible not to like.

She built up an army of her own; she was going to get as many experience points out of the battle as possible, and hopefully significantly reduce the time it took her to get a promotion to full general. She knew she could not win. It was insignificant compared to what would have happened if, say, the Bearers had been defeated by Tirek.

Still, she wished things would have gone better.

Leon built up his army with Scorpions and Wolverines after two of the players on the other side gave up. It wasn't anything particularly fancy, but it was a combination proven to work.

The remaining enemy player, Purple, had four bases. They wouldn't do him as much good as they would have if there had been no unit limit, or if this had been Deathmatch. Covenant players could only use as many units as their fifty point limit would allow... and the UNSC army rolling his way had a lot more than that.

The first base they targeted was on Leon's original base site. That riled him up a little. "He's going down."

"With what we've built up?" Luna said. "Certainly."

She proved right. The enemy base wasn't guarded by units. Locked-down Cobras destroyed the first turret easily, then moved on to blasting a couple buildings on the base pads. Luna set her Vultures to blasting the central buildings. The base had a single shield generator, but it wasn't going to stop the barrage for long. Sure enough, after about fifteen seconds or so, the shield collapsed, and the base itself started taking damage.

A massive volley from Wolverines and Vultures severely damaged the central base structure; unlike UNSC bases, the central buildings of Covenant bases weren't strengthened by other buildings. It died a short time later, with all the buildings blowing up one by one before the base finally died spectacularly.

It was only then that the army started taking fire from the side. A single Scarab had shown up.

All it did was prove that, without support, super tanks had no real chance. MACs wrecked it even before tanks blew it apart with canister shells. The air units didn't even have time to get at it. A few Hunters showed up about then. They didn't fare very well either, though they managed to kill a couple Cobras before dying.

"Why is this person even trying anymore?" Luna asked, surprised. "It's obvious they've lost. Who's heard of anyone winning three versus one in this game?"

"I tried once," Leon said, "But I couldn't match their production. Got one of them to quit when his one star Chieftain died."

"Proves my point," Luna said. Then, realizing what she'd just said, quickly added, "Not that I meant any offense, but it's almost impossible."

"None taken," Leon replied. "Probably wants whatever experience he can get."

"Best case for it I've heard," Ed put in. "Still, guy's not the smartest."

"How long does it take for people to realize that Scarabs are better if you're winning?" Luna asked rhetorically. "Or at least if you still have three players. If you're being hammered already, the Scarab isn't going to provide much relief. All it is now is a target for our leader powers."

"Ask him why he does what he does," Eddy answered. "All I care for is wrecking this guy right now. If other people play less intelligently, then I get to enjoy chewing on more of their units."

They moved on to another base on the enemy's side of the map. It went down as easily had the one before it.

The game was fast becoming a walkover. Although Purple still fought hard, his units didn't have the numbers to prevail for long in any event; the few times his units stood and fought, they essentially got run over. Leader powers smashed them easily; the only time the attacking force came to grief was when the remaining Covenant player used, or tired to use, a large group of Vampires to lash out at their air units. Even then, the problem didn't last long; a Cryo Bomb followed by an attack by Wolverines put paid to the counterassault within thirty seconds.

The third base died. Now all that was left was the enemy player's main base.

"Anyone rational would have given up by now," Luna commented. "The points they gain are trivial, considering the ratio of units killed to lost."

"Probably set himself up for a siege of his last base," Leon said.

"It won't help him much, although the turrets will increase the firepower he has to throw at us."

"Let's get it over with," Leon suggested. No one argued with him.

Celestia built up her army, a half Hunter, half Vampire combination, and waited, upgrading her base turrets in front with Fuel Rod Cannons and those in back with Needlers.

She didn't have to wait long. Blue's tanks rolled on up and blasted her Hunters with canister. They fired back, roasting a couple Scorpions. Green Vultures hovered in to attack. They got frozen by the Stasis Beams of her Vampires.

That was fine... but moments later, MAC rounds landed in the midst of her Hunters, and a Cryo Bomb blasted the Vampires, crashing most of them and freezing the rest so that Wolverines killed all but two of those she had left. Cobras didn't even bother with her turrets, instead firing directly at the base. The shield held of their fire for a minute, after which her base was subjected to their fire.

She sighed, sending her Prophet into his final battle.

"There he is!" Leon yelled excitedly. "Get him!"

Luna laughed. "Such enthusiasm." Nonetheless, she dropped a D-bomb on top of the offending enemy unit, at almost the exact same time that Leon and Eddy dropped their own. One of the bombs, landing right on the Prophet, remained, frozen in mid air; the other two landed to either side.

Even though his powers were disabled, the Prophet still had two Fuel Rod Cannons and a pair of Sentinels firing away... as well as three stars. Wolverine missiles still knocked his shield down, bit by bit, but not as fast as they would have otherwise.

Leon saw the base blow up. "Wow, the Prophet lasted longer than the base."

"Oh, really? I wasn't paying attention," Eddy said.

"Is the Prophet all there is left?"

"I think so," Luna answered. "Let's get him, lest he go around and claim bases all over the map and generally just be annoying that way."

"He's not goin' anywhere," Ed noted.

Indeed, the Prophet's shield had finally collapsed. Even if he had tried to escape, even he couldn't stand up to the full might of three armies all aimed at him. His chair crashed to the ground.

"Faceplant!" Leon cried out.

"Bloody painful faceplant," Eddy said sarcastically.

"Your team is victorious," the game announced.

"Well, that was fun," Luna said. "I'm inviting the remaining player from the other team, this Solar Flare fellow."

"Sure, why not?"

"I wasn't asking you for your permission, Edward."

"Sorry."

"Apology accepted."

There was a pause, then a loud, annoying sound as the other player connected to the party.

"Um, hello?"

There was something familiar about that voice, Leon reflected.

"Sister? Is that you?"

Oh... Leon felt his jaw slowly fall.

"Luna?" came the surprised voice of the Solar Princess. "We were playing against you and your friends?"

Both sisters were silent for a moment, then started to laugh at almost the same time.

"Who were the others playing with you?" Luna asked, trying to control her laughter.

"Snowfire was the Arbiter and Flametail was the Brute Chieftain. I think you know them."

"Oh, yes. I love talking to both of them. So they were your teammates?"

"Yes. I still can't believe you were able to hold out with just one base each!"

"Oh, it's part of a strategy we discovered on Youtube and used ourselves. If you want, I can teach you how to use it yourself."*

"My thanks. And these must be your friends?"

"Oh yes! 'Tia, meet Leon and Edward."

"Very pleased to meet you both," Celestia said.

"Likewise," Leon answered.

"Yer Highness," Ed said.

Celestia laughed. "I'm quite fine with just 'Celestia,' but thank you for the sentiment." Then, after a moment, "Too bad we can't play a 4v4 game."

Laughing, Luna said, "I think we can transition to a different game. First, though, I'm feeling hungry; I suggest we eat."

Celestia laughed, very loudly. "That's the same excuse Flametail gave for resigning. Alright, I can see the need."

"I'll see you soon, then."

"Yes. And, again, a pleasure to meet both of you."

"Thanks!"

"Cheerio!"

Celestia disconnected from the party. Luna sighed in content. "I'll be back later, you two. Right now, a royal dinner awaits me."

"Don't forget to tip your waitress," Leon teased.

Luna chuckled. "Believe me, with the salary they receive, it's hardly necessary. Nonetheless, I shall bear it in mind. Good bye!"

After Luna left, Leon and Eddy agreed to go offline as well. Leon got up and stretched. It had been a good night so far.

Author's Note

* Note; sorry to anyone who is Pro-Confederate, but I just had to do this XD

Also, my thanks to Imzebrony for most of the ideas for this chapter!

Super turtle idea from BAS1STA, who is no longer on Youtube :(

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 3); Civil War

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 3); Civil War

Leon relaxed into his chair as he started the game and waited for the others to join.

"Hey guys!" came Shining Armor's voice. "Just got off duty. Anypony else here?"

"Sorry," Leon said. "Just us, as far as I know."

"I wouldn't say that," Luna put in as she connected. "It's been a busy day so far."

"Tell me about it. A ton of royal visitors, and we had to make sure none of them were Changelings or carrying any contraband into the castle."

"I know it's hard work, Captain, but there is a reason for it."

"I know, I know. I just don't like distrusting our own people."

"After the assault on the palace, security has become a pressing issue. Do not think that I don't realize what kind of dangers you put yourselves in by ensuring that security, or of how hard you work and how much pressure you feel. Please believe me; I am trying to help you. And besides, it's not like you have any work now, or you wouldn't be able to play with us."

"...I guess you're right."

"He-hello?"

"Oh, my dear Fluttershy, welcome," Luna said in a happy tone. "I'm glad you were able to join us."

"Sorry if I'm late," the yellow pegasus mumbled. "I had to bandage a wing on a falcon that I found hurt in my yard, and I wasn't able to make it until now."

"Is he alright?" Leon asked.

"He's fine, but he needed a little love and care; I think that's something we all need."

"Are you feeling up to playing the game?" Shining asked her.

"Oh, yes. He's resting in a little bed I made for him. He'll be okay. He needs some rest right now, is all."

"Well, then, that just leaves Eddy," Leon noticed. "Thought he'd be here by now."

"It's not like we could fairly start without him," Shining replied.

"I wasn't saying that..."

"Hey, chums. What's up?"

"Ah, good to see you made it, Edward."

"Sorry; I'm here now, aren't I?"

"So you are. I think I can start the game now, if there are no objections?" After a few seconds silence, Luna added, "Starting... now."

The screen switched to a loading design, then finally to the main game.

Leon at once checked everything. Arizona and New Mexico were part of his revitalized and independent Texas, as was Oklahoma, which was on the verge of becoming a state. He was looking to get claims on other Mexican states as soon as possible. Out in Siberia, China and Japan (Luna and Shining) were doing what they could against the Russian steamroller as partly-westernized states, which unfortunately for them might not be good enough. Denmark had suffered a revolution in the previous session and was stuck with a Reactionary government and no reforms whatsoever, as well as no army. Fluttershy, as Hawaii, was just sitting out in the Pacific, slowly westernizing.

Leon sighed, partly with relief. He wasn't going to be getting into any war with Mexico for at least five years. He began searching for a good target. Haiti was nice, but it was protected by the USA. It was so frustrating when a weak country was back by a superpower. Even crushing and annexing the smaller state didn't necessarily mean the war would end. Taking Spanish Cuba would have been nice, but he wasn't sure how well he could stand up to the Spanish military.

Alright, so there probably wasn't a very easy target as of now. Whatever. He clicked on Columbia and raised the opinion there. If he couldn't take territory from it he could at least sphere it. He looked west; for some reason, Johore hadn't been annexed by anyone yet; going after it was, for a weak nation or an impoverished one, a very good idea, as it had lots of gold, and had a weak army of irregulars. He could also establish a protectorate - i.e. annex an uncivilized country as a colony - over Dai Viet, or Atjeh. The one big problem with that was the fact that it was so far away; if the Netherlands or anyone else powerful in that region declared war on him, he would have trouble. He went and made sure to justify a war on Johore. The others would fall after that.

"Finally!' Luna sighed as Russia made peace with her and Shining Armor. "Thought we might have to conquer Moscow just to get them out."

"I got Sakhalin out of it," Shining said positively.

"You did, and I got Kokand. It still seems a shallow victory."

"Well, I'm about to get something else out of it. I'm going to westernize pretty soon. I'm going after Johore to boost my economy."

"Very well. I'll take Dai Viet."

"D'oh!"

"Something wrong, Leon?" Luna asked seriously

"... No, not really." Leon sighed, though not into the microphone. Well, those two countries were off limits. He went and began prefabricating a casus belli on Atjeh.

"Hey, Fluttershy," he said, "Can you give me military access?"

"Oh, of course. Um, what will you be doing with it?" she asked timidly.

"If I was coming to invade you, I wouldn't be asking for it," he answered, and he heard her sigh with relief. "Just some... business in Asia."

"Well, okay."

After getting military access - which would allow him to send his units into Hawaii and let him heal his ships so he could make it into East Asia - he built up some clipper transports. They were sailing ships and, without the Panama Canal, would take forever to make it where he wanted them to go, but steam transports were a while away, as he was generally focusing on every tech branch other than navy. They'd do for now.

Japan immediately went to war with Johore and China went to war with Dai Viet a few days of in-game time later.

"...You've got to be joking me," came a disgruntled British voice.

"Aw nuts," Leon muttered, seeing that Prussia had declared war on Denmark. "Well, they won't wipe you out of the game."

"Not the point, mate! How am I supposed to get back the stuff they steal? And they will steal something, I can't stop them."

"Don't you have allies?"

"Yeah, but our military power isn't anywhere close to theirs."

"Well, just hope you can hold them off until the computer makes some sort of weird cop-out deals that it makes every so often."

"Hoping for that is kind of weak, Leo."

"Can you think of anything else to do?"

After a short pause, he heard Ed sigh. "Good point. I'm going to try fighting them. Wish they had some colonies I could mess up for them, that would have come in handy."

"Try to get the techs that help you colonize after the war," Leon advised.

"Yeah, I think that's pretty much obvious."

Meanwhile, Leon took a look at the wars. So far, nothing too unusual; Britain annexing stuff in India, Russia going after various Uzbek nations, South American countries fighting wars that rarely seemed to go anywhere, et cetera. He built up his army, put five units on transports, and sent them to Hawaii, where they stopped briefly before continuing on their journey.

"This war is going quite well," Luna noted. "I'll get plenty of research points for it, that's for sure, in addition to taking at least part of Vietnam.."

"Me too, Johore's a pushover... Hey Leon, what's your fleet doing here?" Shining asked.

The message that Texas had declared war on Atjeh flashed.

"Well, that's one way to answer a question," the unicorn stallion remarked. "Won't you be in danger from the Netherlands?"

"And you won't?"

"True, but I have a much bigger population. I think you're biting off more than you can chew."

"Well, I'll do what I can, but in the meantime, this will do. I'll get high relations with whatever great powers are in Europe."

"Okay."

As an uncivilized nation, Atjeh wasn't very difficult to fight. It's army lasted for two battles, after which he split up his army and carpet sieged their land, then annexed them in the peace. It was a fairly short war.

"Well, that was fun," he remarked. He skirted over Texas to take a look at things when all of a sudden the Louisiana switched from blue to gray.

"What the..."

"Something wrong?" Luna inquired. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, it's just that Louisiana kinda changed color all of a sudden."

"Oh, the Civil War has started, then."

"Yes." Leon took a look; the USA clearly outweighed the CSA; it had more states and territories than the latter, and it's military score was much higher. However, the CSA had a weird set-up of land in the west; Oregon and Idaho were gray, while Washington remained blue.

"I'm curious; how does the whole Civil War mechanic work?" Shining asked.

"Well, don't quote me," Leon replied, "but I think it all has to do with Dixie population and whether or not a state was admitted as a slave state; if a state is a slave state, I think it automatically changes to the Confederacy when the war begins. Consciousness in the slave states - generally the south, as well as territories and states that are admitted as slave states - determines when the war begins. When it gets too high, it will start the war."

"Does the North usually win?" Luna asked, sounding serious.

"Yes, but occasionally I've seen the South win; I don't know how or why, but they do. Also, any Dixie units in the US army will revolt when the war comes along, so that immediately adds to their army."

"That's... sneaky. And I cannot abide slavery. I had my full of it when my sister and I ousted Sombra as king." Her voice took on a very serious note. "I... I will never forget it, even if I should live another twenty thousand years. I saw ponies in absolute misery, ponies without hope, some with an expression begging for anything, even death, to free them from their bondage. I was most upset when the Empire disappeared." She took a deep breath. "I know that slavery on Earth wasn't influenced by magic, but no being should ever be forced into such an unfair condition."

"I don't know," Eddy interjected. "Some people think terrorists should be enslaved when captured."

"You don't know what you're saying," Luna admonished. "The closest we get to that is sending prisoners to Tartarus,, which, contrary to the beliefs of some, is not the underworld but rather a prison for the most evil criminals and monsters known to our world, and even so we don't torture or abuse them."

"Still sounds like a bad place to go."

"Oh, it is. But enough about that. I think I've made it clear, but I hope the North wins."

"I hope they lose," Eddy said. "Keeping the CSA independent is a good way to keep the USA down in score."

"I don't think they'll win this time," Leon noted. "Then again, I've proven wrong about that. Sometimes they win regardless of how much military they have. The USA usually just re-annexes them in a future Restoration of Order war."

"How does that work?" Shining asked.

"You get a restoration of order casus belli when all of another country's states and territories have your cores on them, which is why the USA and China get it so much, because they end up with break away regions such as the CSA and Heavenly Kingdom."

"Ah. So, if my Japan had a civil war and I lost, I would have that casus belli on the rebel faction?"

"Yes, provided that every city had a Japanese core on it."

"Pretty decent mechanic."

"Yeah, and I'm going to take advantage of it by annexing Louisiana." Leon went and began justifying a war to claim a state from the CSA. "Preferably I would prefer getting Arkansas as well, but the war might be over before then."

"Won't the USA get angry that you're effectively stealing one of their states?" Luna asked, interested.

"I hope not. I'm strong enough to re-challenge Mexico, but not the USA."

"Why try then?"

"Because I like how my borders will look when I get it."

Luna, Shining, and Ed all laughed. "A good reason for war, if I do say so myself," the latter said.

The justification took a while. Leon watched as Portugal swallowed Yemen and France annexed Madagascar and Oman. Britain continued to gobble up India as Russia took over Kokand and Khiva.

"Aw, nuts," Shining said irritably. "Crisis over Korea. It's that bottom region."

"That could be a problem," Luna replied. "I'll take your side, of course."

"You're a great power already?"

'Yes; the super-fast industrialization and massive number of workers China has boosted my score in that department very high. And my enormous military and great economy might have something to do with it."

A message came up on Leon's screen. "What the...!?"

"Everyone seems to have something bad happening to them," Ed noticed. "What's up with you, Leo?"

"Mexico just decided to try 'liberating' New Mexico." Leon sent his army into defensive positions and boosted his military budget, as well as his stockpile. "Great, have to micro manage all the taxes and tariffs, again."

"You could just give up, if you're too upset by that to fight it out," Luna joked.

"Nah. I'll send them back across the border, where they belong... except for the immigrants who actually came here legally."

"Heh," Ed chuckled. "Question is, have you got the army to do it?"

"Yes. Their army sucks. The USA beats them all the time. If I still had Sam Houston, they'd be dead."

"But you don't. Deal with it."

"I will. The AI is so stupid. They love initiating a war of liberation that they can't win, or at least against people they've been beaten by before."

Leon sent his army into Laredo. Although the incoming Mexican army outnumbered him, his army had plenty of experience, as well as a decent general (+2 defense, +1 attack, +5 speed), and the Mexican force staggered back, suffering heavy casualties. Unfortunately, that was only one enemy force; another simply marched into New Mexico and began besieging a city.

"Grrrrrr..." He sent his second army to attack them. Again, he had a military force that, though outnumbered, was good enough to just win, and the Mexicans once more fell back, stung by the Texan hornet.

"Oh great," Luna said sarcastically, "they added a condition that demands that I get cut down to size. That's fine," she added. "I'll just add that I demand... whatever this Russian colony is, uh, Russian Haiwiwiwiwhatever it is."

"Who's leading the enemy?"

"Austria, with Russia joining them and the Ottomans not far behind," she answered irritably. "France is on our side, but Britain might... blast, they just joined the other side. This isn't getting any easier."

"Call me in if you actually get pulled into war."

"I can't," Luna said appreciatively, "not when you're already engaged with a power with more military. Just imagine how bad you'll lose if Britain invades you!"

"...I guess that might be slightly problematic." Leon checked his relations with the USA. "Okay, the USA might not join my war this time, although they hate Mexico's guts, and vice versa."

"They might... ah, that's good, they joined our side of the crisis," Luna said. "Although with the Civil War they have going on..."

"Yeah, I can see why they didn't want to join my own war." The USA wasn't losing the war, but it wasn't decisively winning, either. Maybe all the Dixie revolts in the army had disrupted them. The only two pieces of Confederate territory they held were both in Kentucky. "Nope, they aren't going to help me, worse luck. Oh well."

"That means your own planned war with the CSA isn't going to happen in time," Shining noted, "unless they actually win against the USA."

"Probably not; the warscore so far is against them. Again, oh well. I tried. But I can win against Mexico," he added, as again the Mexicans tried to advance into Laredo, and again they were ignominiously kicked out. "Damn, what does it take for these guys to take 'no' for an answer?"

"Ahem."

"Oh sorry. But honestly, what does it take for the AI to realize no means no?"

"Players tend to be even more stubborn," the night Princess informed him. "I've played a game where one player refused to give in with 99% of his land conquered. Had to take it all over just to force him to give up a tiny province. Some people are so irrational."

"....Yeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaah," Leon said slowly. I might just be one of those people.

Luna giggled. Leon sighed.

"Um, I just got taken out of the USA's sphere... again," Fluttershy whispered.

Leon jolted. He'd forgotten she was playing, considering she rarely said anything. "That's good, actually. I read somewhere that if the USA has Hawaii in it's sphere, they can annex them whenever they want."

'What, really? What happens then?"

"You lose."

"Oh, my..."

"Just thank God the USA didn't do it. I don't know how or why, but they should have, according to that webpage. I guess the AI had something weird go on."

"You mean I could have been kicked from the game at any time? Couldn't I just refuse annexation?"

"Nope; it said there is nothing you can do about it at all.... Oops," he said, as he heard her gasp. "Sorry. But anyway, it didn't happen."

"How do I avoid going back into their sphere?"

"I don't know for sure, but try and get relations up with Britain or France or some other major power. And I don't know if it'll work, but decrease relations with the USA, maybe it will make them less likely to try sphering you."

"What? I couldn't do that. I just don't have it in me to be unfriendly on purpose."

Leon rolled his eyes, even he knew it wasn't quite as ridiculous as she made the policy sound; decreasing relations with a great power wasn't the best thing to do when you had no protection.

"I'll try sphering you," Luna said. "After you westernize, you'll be immune to being auto-annexed. At least, I think so."

"Oh, okay."

"I looked that up at some point, Leo," Eddy put in. "I think that as of AHD, the USA no longer gets the option to insta-annex Hawaii with a decision."

"Oh, oops. In that case, Flutters, don't worry about it."

The Union was starting to pick up the pace; more regions began falling to the North, which, along with having more factories, had plenty of people to throw into the battle. The South was clearly showing the strain; when he looked at their harbors, he noticed they were mostly blockaded.

Mexico wasn't helping the situation; Leon had added a wargoal to claim Sonora, which cost him some infamy, but would be worth it if he could take it. The Mexicans were persistent; their armies kept coming despite being repeatedly battered. It helped a little that the tiny navy he'd built was blockading a couple of provinces, but it wasn't affecting the warscore all that much.

The good news was that he was building more units, some of them from New Mexico and Arizona. Over all, it wasn't a one-sided war, not even close. The Mexicans were still fairly bad in terms of technology, and they lost more soldiers than they had to as a result in battles. Here, their impatience was proving a great undoing.

"Why do the Mexicans suck so bad?" Shining asked as he watched the Mexicans lose yet another battle.

"They start out with Irregulars for the majority of their starting army, as opposed to Regulars," Luna noted. "I've played them before, and it's partly why they lose so badly early on. Very late in the game, as an AI, they usually catch up in terms of military technology, but by then, it's usually too late, and they're permanently stuck at Secondary Power, if not Civilized. They can become a great nation under control of a good player, but then you could say that about any nation in the game."

"I have positive warscore, but I'm not sure whether I can actually take Sonora," Leon said. "They can just rebuild a ton of regiments and keep coming. I really hate it when the AI decided to send in a ton of mini armies to capture territory. Even sending in a full-sized army to kill them doesn't keep them away permanently."

"If you keep killing them, and, I believe, their mobilized brigades, their war exhaustion will grow unbearably high," Luna advised. "I think it should be easy, given their deficiency in military technology."

Leon wrecked another Mexican force. "I think that would happen regardless of what I do," he answered.

It wasn't long before another enemy force was trashed by his army. Although his own units had suffered loss, Leon was confident he could now take the offensive. Every region lost by Mexico was another that would be unable to provide units, taxes, and industry, making it much harder to take lands from him. It wasn't a core of his, but then, neither were any of the lands he had taken from them so far, with the exception of what had been Mexican Texas.

After sending an army to besiege Sonoran territory, he turned an eye toward his economy. It wasn't all that bad, and industry was picking up the slack. However, he had to readjust some tax and tariff sliders in order to pay for the war.

He took a look at the rest of the world. Britain was still in the lead in terms of score, but France was just behind them, and Prussia had formed the North German Federation; all they really had to do was seize Alsace-Lorraine, and maybe do a little more sphere work. Luna's China had westernized, and was quickly making up for lost time by industrializing; considering the massive populations in China, their factories would almost never run out of people to work in them. Shining's Japan had enacted the Meiji Restoration and was rapidly building a massive military; as his ally, Leon could see his units crowding up north; it was clear he intended to take his cores away from Russia when an opportune time came. Fluttershy was building toward Westernization, although, with only one province, she was having understandable problems trying to build up her economy; while Hawaii started out with a whopping 80% literacy rate, it only started with fish, which didn't sell for much. Eddy was trying to reenact his former reforms, but it was going to be hard with the Reactionaries having forced their hand on him, and Austria and Prussia were likely to declare war on him any day now.

He checked his score. He actually wasn't all that far off from becoming a Great Power, although a higher military and industrial score would help. Japan would become a Great Power shortly, and Sardinia-Piedmont was slowly sphering the Italian states, so it was likely that Italy would form soon.

He looked at the CSA and checked how many brigades it had; 8. And that was with mobilization. As he was digesting this, his war justification came in.

"That's it, I'm doing it." He declared war on the CSA for Louisiana.

"That's rather bold," Luna remarked. "I thought you wouldn't be able to handle it?"

"They're down to eight brigades, with mobilization. I think they're finished. And I'm building another army anyway. And Mexico is kinda the same."

"Well, then, I wish you good luck."

The Confederacy, already badly beaten by the Union, was now stuck with the brutal problem of trying to fight off a prepared Texas and a resurgent United States with too few brigades. It began losing territory in earnest. Leon's war with Mexico was made a little harder by the decision, but the Confederates didn't bother to send any units to contest him; if he had to guess, all eight rebel brigades were in the same army trying to fight the United States. He checked quickly; the USA currently had 28 brigades, vs. eight Confederate, with nearly a hundred ships against a paltry nine.

"Finally got up a few brigades," Ed remarked. "I can put up a fight of some sort if Prussia comes knocking. Not a very good one, but at least I can say 'screw you' once before they rip me in half."

"What the... Oh, this is great!" Shining cheered. "I'm a Great Power already!"

"I suppose I'll have a rival for my sphere," Luna noted, amused. "I'll try not to swamp you."

"My first target will be trying to get my cores back from Russia, so don't worry about it too much."

"Uh-huh, then why did I just have to ban you from Korea if you weren't going to do any sphering?"

"Well, I had to try to slip one past you sometime, didn't I?"

"Be careful, Captain; you may have a better military in terms of equipment, but the hordes of China are endless."

"Right," Shining said submissively. "I'll bear that in mind, then... Oh," he said, obviously upset. "Britain's fabricating a war justification against me; place in the sun."

"Ouch. That can't be good."

"Tell me about it; My army's good, with a lot of brilliant commanders, but I'm not sure how I'd fare against the world's leading naval power."

"In my experience, the British like to skimp off army tech a bit to go after naval technology," Leon said. "I think their army won't be much better than yours. You'll have to worry about them blockading you, but if you have a big army with decent generals, you should win the land battles."

"Which only helps so much. They can hold on to Okinawa and my other island possessions, and I won't be able to do much about it."

"They'll get tired eventually," Luna said encouragingly, "especially considering that we are - still - allies."

"Thanks Princess, but I can't really ask you to do that-"

"You can. My army isn't as good as theirs, but I've Westernized, and I have access to cavalry and artillery, as well as a lot of unemployed workers to fill my factories forever. I can easily afford to pay for the war, should it come."

"Again, thanks. I'm glad I have you on my side."

"My pleasure."

Leon succeeded in occupying all of Louisiana, and moved onto Little Rock, the only piece of Arkansas not occupied by Union forces. He received an offer of white peace from the CSA. He ignored it; he wasn't going to do that now. The main problem, of course, wasn't Confederate resistance, but the progress of the Union; if the Confederacy surrendered before he could convince them to give him what he wanted, the Union would take back all Confederate land, and he'd end up looking stupid. He clicked on a Confederate territory, went to the "make peace" option, and saw that they were willing to give him what he wanted, if only just. He clicked on it, and a few in-game days later the war ended, and Louisiana switched from gray to the cyan color of Texas.

"Not a bad haul," Luna said as the game continued. "I suppose it will be your last gain from what will once more be part of the USA for awhile."

"Probably... but not from Mexico."

"That sounds a bit harsh. You've beaten them up quite thoroughly."

'And they didn't learn their lesson. I'm going to teach them that it's not a good idea to 'liberate' lands I took from them."

"By annexing Sonora."

"It will weaken them; all units they have from there will forcibly disband, and they'll be weaker industry and tax-wise as well."

"It will also make them more revanchist."

"If they become Fascist, I'll be more than willing to remind them of my army's proficiency."

"Sounds like Mexico is going to have trouble getting back up, Shining said.

"They will. And if they're smart, they won't try to take anything back from me again."

"That sounds mean," Fluttershy murmured.

"Can't say that their effort to take stuff I needed was nice either. It's not like I'm committing atrocities left and right, I'm just trying to make sure I have no more trouble from them; if I just white peace'd out of the war, Mexico would try again later. Maybe by taking a state from them, they won't be so foolish. And it's also beneficial in other ways."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the USA can't use the 'restore order' casus belli to annex me in one go. They'd have to fight numerous conflicts, because I own a region where they do not have cores."

"Oh."

"What the...?" Luna said suddenly, surprised. "The Heavenly Kingdom just spawned."

"You're having your own civil war?"

"Yes, Shining; unfortunately for them, I have a massive military whereas they only have one province or so. This will be easy."

"I hope so."

"I know so. They have but one province; I have an enormous empire. This will be short, quick, and to the point."

"As long as someone like Russia doesn't decide to try and rip something off you."

"Hmm, that would be most annoying indeed."

In the meantime, Leon managed his economy a bit more, then watched the Civil War play to it's conclusion. The CSA refused to surrender until every last town had been taken. Their position had been terrible from the start, but they had done what they could, given the circumstances. On March 15th, 1864, the United States annexed the CSA, restoring the Union. He checked his relation with the US; no change, so they weren't upset that he'd swiped Louisiana out from under them. He knew that a human (or pony) player wouldn't have been as tolerant of that.

"I guess that result wasn't all that unexpected," Eddy commented. "Not like they had much to begin with."

"Still, it delayed the United States," Luna observed. "three years or so in which we were able to develop and expand, while they had to focus their resources on the war."

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," Shining said suddenly, exasperated. "Now Russia wants all my entire northern island."

"I suppose I can fight them as well as Britain," Luna said," But... Hold on," She said, and promptly stopped talking. The game paused.

"What do you think that was about?" Ed wondered.

"Could be anything," Shining answered. "Might be some kind of protest outside to something as big as Tirek roaming free. I sure hope not on that last one; it was humiliating to have my powers just sucked out of me. I was too weak even to try to strike him with my horn. My sister and her friends came through for us, though - again."

"Isn't there some kind of inversion spell that unicorns could use?" the British player asked. "Like, if he went to suck energy from you, it would give you energy from him instead?"

"I think that would be possible, but complex. When there's only seconds to make a decision, it's easier to think of easy solution rather than the more complicated ones. I haven't looked up inversion spells, but I'd bet my last bit it would be needlessly difficult to pull off. Not that I'm saying it's a bad idea, though, good thinking."

"Alright, I'm back," Luna said. "I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to call this session closed. A Guard has just told me that one of my maidservants is having a nightmare, and I have to go and try to fix it."

"Aw, man," Leon groaned.

"We'd have had to quit soon anyway; tonight I have to hold Night Court." She paused. "At least I can face it knowing I had fun with you beforehoof. I must thank you, my friends."

"You don't have to thank me, Princess," Shining said. "I'm a Guard; it's my duty to serve the Crown."

"You are a Prince, making you at least something of an equal. Farewell, all of you, and a very good night to you all!"

As the game ended and Leon got off the computer, he found himself invigorated, and vowed to return soon, to adventures that were to come.

Author's Note

Well, this might have insulted some people, with the whole Civil War thing and slavery. However, Louisiana did get "saved" from falling back into Union hands, so that's something, and at least Texas is independent :)

I am not sure whether it is possible for the Taiping (meaning Perfect Peace) Rebellion to trigger if China has westernized. I apologize if it isn't.

Tropico 5, Game 1 (part 1)

"Glad we have this time together today," Leon said as he connected to the channel.

"How did your classes go?" Ed asked.

"Good, except for math. I can't fathom why they would make us go through algebra in high school, rather than in college. It's not like I'm going to need anything other than the PEMDAS system to calculate stuff. As far as I'm concerned, just teach us the basics unless we really want to get into a job that needs it. Historian, as far as I can remember, doesn't feature complicated math."

"Yeah, my teacher went and said that my score on my recent exam was unsatisfactory; that was an understatement. My parents aren't too happy, to say the least, but there you go."

"Knowing algebra is useful though," Luna argued. "Architecture and similar jobs require advanced math; without it, it is doubtful that Canterlot could exist, or at least not as it is, on the side of a mountain."

"Yeah, I know, but as I'm going to take a job that needs knowledge of the past and present, rather than on pi and hippotonuses and I don't know what else, it shouldn't count against me."

There was a short silence.

"Finally," Luna said as Shining Armor joined the group.

"Sorry. Got tangled with some paperwork. Only part of the job I really hate."

"Well, we're all here now."

"So, what's the story with this game?" Shining asked. "I got it after Luna advised me to buy it."

"Basically, you play as the dictator of a Caribbean island," Leon explained. "You build up your city and it's economy and try not to get invaded by foreign powers or get voted out of office."

"Sounds... troublesome."

"Not at all... at least, not as hard as building a workable rocket," Luna said in a teasing tone.

"Oh, Princess, please, don't..." Eddy protested in vain.

FLASHBACK

"Ok guys, I think I got this right this time."

"It's pretty big," Leon said.

They were watching via livestream as Eddy tried his hand at Kerbal Space Program. He'd built a gigantic rocket in career mode, with Jebediah "Jeb" Kermin in the capsule as pilot.

"Are you sure the engines will be enough to lift it?" Luna asked. "It will need substantial lift in order to overcome the weight."

"Please, I've added over two dozen powerful engines to the first stage. It'll get into space without trouble."

"Well you be able to land on the Mun and get back?" Leon inquired.

"Yeah; once this baby's in space, it'll get there no problem, land, and takeoff again as I see fit. After that, getting back will be a cinch."

"Well, if you say so."

"I do say so. And now, for the launch!"

Nothing happened.

"Wait... hold on... it should..."

Several engines on one side of the bottom-most stage ignited. The rocket tipped over on the launch pad and exploded.

"What the...?"

Leon fell out the chair with laughter. Luna's hoof repeatedly banged against her desk as she too unleashed her mirth.

"Oh... my sides..."

"By the stars, I haven't seen anything as hilarious since the time all the Guards' paperwork fell out the window and was scattered throughout Canterlot!"

"Guys, really? Got anything better to say?"

'Yeah," Leon said, trying hard to recover. "RIP Jeb."*

"Not one my best rockets," Eddy admitted. "I've improved since, though."

"Anyway," the Lunar Princess said, trying to recover from the fit of laughter she'd undergone recounting the incident, "the game revolves around your economy. It's almost impossible to remain out of debt for the entire match, but it can happen. As long as you've built up plantations and ranches as early and as much as possible early on, you should be fine for money for a while; an agriculture-based economy will, in general, never run out of material."

"What about mines?" Shining asked.

"Those will eventually run out; unlike in Tropico 4, there is no Borehole Mine that would give you infinite material... yet. Same thing with lumber."

"What about the setting?"

"You start out in the Colonial Era," Leon explained, "and gradually work up into the succeeding eras, which will unlock more technologies and buildings. The Colonial Era is easiest, as you can't build stuff for healthcare, and so you really don't have to worry about it much, although people will occasionally die. The buildings are fairly cheap, except for mansions, and most people prefer to build country houses. Anyone living in a country house doesn't need to buy food, because they grow it in their backyards. You begin under the Crown, and have to fulfill a bunch of rather stupid and senseless missions for them, and gradually build up support to gain support for independence."

"Can you lose?"

'Yes, and the easiest way to lose is fail in a war of independence, which is one reason why many people don't bother with it and prefer to go into national debt to pay off the king. The other way to lose is to be dethroned by foreign invasion or from domestic rebellion. Of course, that counts for a sandbox game, not the campaign or multiplayer gameplay in general, where failing a crucial objective or being killed off by another player, respectively, are enough to kick you off the throne."

"Is it hard to stay in power?"

"It can be, especially when a faction with a substantial population is upset with you; I find the Environmentalists to be one of the most frustrating factions, and the Communists usually have a big fan base, so, practically, it's wise not to anger them."

"Now, as I understand it, you usually have to be elected, unless you issue Martial Law?"

"Correct. But if you do that, the people get angry at you for some reason, so it's best to only use that as a last resort."

"'For some reason?'"

"Okay, so that joke fell flat on it's face, big deal. But it's no joke to say that you have to balance gaining money and building what you want with the happiness and contentment of the people and the foreign powers."

"So instead of instantly losing the game, you can actually fight your way out?"

"Yes, but your military capacities aren't very good early on; you'll have to get to the World Wars Era first to have a viable army."

"Do you get a navy?"

"No... well, you get an aircraft carrier in the Cold War Era, but there's no naval combat. It's basically seaborne platform for two fighter-bombers, which is the closest you get to an air force."

"Not so sure about being a dictator..."

"You can choose to be an evil dictator, a good one, or something in between."

"Like in Fable?"

"Not exactly, but yeah, you can choose how harsh or how easy you are on your people. Considering that Tropico is a mock-up of Caribbean dictatorships, it's meant to be comical. No shooting Juanito here, though. No jailing people either*, which I find kind of odd, because all you can do with crooks is banish tem, kill them, bribe them, or... I forgot the fourth option, but it's there."

"It's Car-ib-be-an, mate," Eddy corrected him.

"Carib-be-an," Leon counter-corrected.

"Oh, not this kind of argument," Luna groaned.

"Oh, all right..."

"Anyway... here are the rules," the Princess stated. "No attacking one another for the first fifteen minutes; I will be keeping track of that. Anyone who breaks this rule will be banned. We'll play the game until there's only one of us left standing. If we have to adjourn, I'll save the game and keep it until the next time we play. We'll be playing on the hardest rules... Shining, if you run into trouble, just ask one of us for help. I won't be letting anyone declare war if you're under-developed."

"Okay."

"Alright, starting... now."

The screen changed.

"Blasted North Korean government," Leon said as fact about a North Korean dictator came up on the loading screen.

"Which brings me to some suspicions regarding what happened a few weeks ago," Eddy said slyly.

"Oh... alright, fine, I admit it," Luna said. "Equestria may have had a hoof in it. And with disabling their thousands of artillery leveled at Seoul. We may have sent in teams of unicorns to sabotage them in the night before the incident."

"Some secret service talk you got there, Luna."

"It's supposed to stay secret," Luna reasoned. "I'm glad to say that it's all part of the Republic of Korea now, that I can really admit."

"Good thing they never learned how to build rockets. They only knew how to build missiles... like too many KSP players."

"Yeah they... hey!" Eddy protested.

"Ah, here were are," Leon said quickly as the game started.

"Not a bad palace, all things considered," Shining noted.

Leon got a notice at once; Lord Oaksworth, the King's emissary for the region, asking him about the trading licence he would like to take. As much as three trade routes would be as opposed to one, he didn't see the benefit in paying $4,000 out of the $10,000 he was starting with; the other choice the Crown would accept called for half the price, but that was still two thousand bucks he preferred to spend on building stuff. He chose to buy a license from the Dutch for $500, and built a road to connect his city to the dock.

"What should I build first? After getting the license?"

"Build plantations," Leon advised, going to his own build menu and selecting a Cocoa plantation. "Ranches will also serve, and I'd put a number of cattle ranches next to your plantation, for the fertilizer bonus."

"Alright. What's with the years and days stuff over the minimap?"

"Oh, that's your mandate as governor. You have to gain independence before it runs out. Completing missions for the Crown will extend it, though why a Spanish colony was established by the British is beyond me."

"West India Trading company; we Brits are everywhere on the globe, and the sun never sets on our empire."

"Well, anyway, the Crown gives you some missions, usually for some stupid reason like building an underwater palace that they never complete and declaring war on the North and South poles. They'll also ask money from you sometimes, and certain action can decrease your mandate, like when the revolutionaries demand you insult the King."

"Sounds like fun.

"Oh, yes." Leon built a couple plantations on green ground, and building a Catholic Mission in a central place in his city. "Well, I'm already broke and in the negative," he added. "It'll be worth it."

"You're not good with money," Eddy was quick to say. "Spenders tend to have an addiction to spending money and allergies in regards to saving it."

"It'll pay off," Leon insisted. "Oh, apparently the stupid king wants to build a palace underwater, and he wants me to sell stuff to him so he can sell it for twice the profit in Europe. As if Britain never had a ton of money in this era."

"Gotta account for the fact that it's a fictional game, mate," Ed put in. "Could be that Europe is entirely united in the game, as opposed to the real world."

"Well, anyway, he wants me to sell cotton, and I've spent my money on Cocoa."

"You're still going to be rich; just make another plantation when a ship comes around."

"I guess, but I'll need better housing and all that stuff that helps the revolution, and more people to work my plantations and things."

"I just got a task to sell wool and cotton," Shining said. "Where do I get wo... oh, never mind, I just need to build a ranch."

"Got a quest to help him build a bonfire," Luna groaned. "So I'm supposed to send him wood just so he can watch it burn? That's pathetic."

"Got the same mission as Leon did," Edward noted. "As if an underwater palace is practical."

"He doesn't have to ask for practical stuff, as long as he's the king and can imprison or kill anyone who tells him different."

Leon waited for awhile, as the construction workers got to work. They went and finished the Mission first - it was the closest build site - and went on to start work on the plantations.

"I'm assuming the teamster's officer does the same job as it did in the previous game?" the pony prince asked.

"Yes, it does. However, you really have to make sure you have enough."

"Best not to have too many, either, as they take up a bunch of workers."

"I hear that. You really have to manage how many workers go into what job. I'd prefer to get upgrades that reduce the number of workers, which will naturally force some of them into other jobs. Best case scenario, they get funneled into the military."

"I'd rather they get into jobs that will help make more money, but to each his own. Um, what does the -30 relations with the crown mean?"

"It means they'll send you $3,000 less at the end of the year; you gain money each year from the Crown based on your relations; at 100 relations, you get $10,000 at the end of the year."

"So that kinda hurts you."

"Yes, but in the short term, you have more money to spend on your own buildings, with the idea being that you'll make up for the deficiency with domestic production."

"That might be worth if, if you can get your economy right. I'll got for the silver package, though. I'll net a thousand dollars out of the deal."

"To each his own."

"Ha ha ha!"

His plantations finished, Leon got enough money at the end of the year to build a Library, which was necessary to start research. While this was a little late to be building it, he wanted money more than tech at the moment. The number of educated people you started out with were few in number anyway, and they were needed for jobs like that.

"Can we trade with each other?"

"I don't think so, but I think you can choose to share teamsters and share resources like timber."

"Ah."

Leon queued up a cotton plantation on some favorable ground, along with a couple ranches. He also set up a trade route for cocoa with the Crown and queued up a couple country houses; he was going to need a place for new arrivals - and for some of his existing people - to stay. He also unlocked the tech to upgrade ranches and used some of those upgrades at once.

"I'd save up for mansions."

"Why, Ed? They're so freaking expensive to build, and the people in them have to go out and buy food! Why build them?"

"They look better and people will pay more to live in them."

"Well, yeah, but most people aren't going to have that kind of money... oh right," he said, adjusting the pay on his plantations. Yes, this would mean more money lost each month, but the workers there would work harder, and more money would be made in the long run. He did the same with his teamster's office and construction office. "There. They won't be rich, but they'll be happy, and maybe more likely to join the revolution."

"Oh, the king wants more wood, for an even larger bonfire," Luna said distastefully. "How big a fire do you need before you're satisfied?"

"More cotton, just to do the same thing again on a greater scale," Ed noted. "Greedy bast-"

"What's the point of the king trying to conquer the North and South poles again?" Shining asked quickly.

"There isn't one. Kings just like to do stupid things that also make them look cool."

"This game seems like it's deliberately trying to make fun of the monarchal system."

"It is. I mean, even in real life, the aristocracy did things that were wasteful, like having messages brought to them on trays, as though they were meals."

"I have to admit, that's wasteful," Luna agreed. "All the same though, not all monarchies are bad, stupid, or foolish."

"Agreed," Eddy said at once. "You think there'd be a tale of King Arthur if there weren't some out there that were decent?"

"A lot of the anti-monarchal sentiments are relics of the French and Russian revolutions," Leon said, "which occurred when the king, or Czar as might be the case, was corrupt, brutal, or both. I don't particularly care for the way the rebels dealt with the problem, though."

"What...?"

"Not going to give you the details," Leon said quickly. "Just try not to get into either subject if you want to remain an optimist."

"Ooooo-kaaaaaayyy..."

"Let's try and focus on the game," Eddy advised. "So the king is getting greedy and he's doing even more stupid stuff. How's your approval rating?"

"34," Leon answered.

"29," Luna said.

"25," Shining replied.

"And I have 30. So we're not close enough to popular support to rebel. And we can only revolt one at a time, as individual players, not as a united front."

"So we advance in eras alone?"

"Yes. Of course, getting declared war on by a player in a more advanced era isn't good, so it's best to try and keep up."

Leon continued to build up his town and economy. He got the Sickle technology, which unlocked upgrades for plantations, and proceeded to use those upgrades, after which he began researching the Trigger, which would unlock the Military Fort. He built a couple more plantations, and another ranch with them. He also built another dock and teamster's office. He kept watching as teamsters walked to his plantations, grabbed a sack-full of stuff, and dragged it all the way to the dock.

Wow, I actually feel sorry for those guys. When the truck is invented in the next era, they'll be happier.

"Why is building a Mission so important?" Shining asked. "Couldn't I wait until a church is unlocked?"

"Yes, but in the meantime, the Mission's the only religious building you have, and the only way to satisfy the need for religion. If you don't build it, people won't be as happy, and your approval rating will show it. And it's good in another way too, because when you reach the Cold War Era, you can finally start on tourism, and the Historic Inn requires Colonial buildings nearby to reach it's max potential." Of course, I could say that I'd think it was wrong NOT to build it...

"Will the Military Fort also do that? And what about plantations?"

"I don't know about plantations, but I think the fort does count, Stuff I think that might also count are docks, mines, and most buildings constructed in the Colonial Era."

"Getting pretty down on my mandate."

"Don't worry; the first time you get down to five months, you'll receive an extra year for free."

"That's convenient."

"Lord Oaksworth says he had nothing to do with it... or nothing they can prove, at any rate."

"That's kinda creepy."

"I know, right? But it's all part of the game." Suddenly, a message popped up for Leon. "Oh, apparently the revolutionaries want me to insult the king."

"Refuse."

"They'll riot if I don't, and although I'm building a military," he said, placing a Military Fort near the dock, and a Guard Tower with it, "I'm not sure if they'll help, and if they do, they'll kill rebels and make it harder to gain independence. So, I kinda have to." He chose to select the insult button. "Oh, it's the insulting gift option; let's see... I have the choice of sending him a pisspot, a bent sword, or pink undergarments."

"I know which one I'd send him," Eddy giggled.

"I'll send the bent sword; it sounds funny, and it's useless anyway as a weapon." He got a reply back pretty quick; "Looks like he's mad."

"Not having it would be a problem," Ed agreed.

"And I lose five thousand bucks," Leon said a moment later. "Gee thanks, ripping me off just because I sent you a gift."

"it was intended as an insult."

"Yeah, but still, the sentiment..."

"At least you're still in charge."

"I guess that's a plus." Leon sighed and built another Guard Tower; it was usually best to build them near the coast, to help delay invading forces. Guard towers were almost never enough to kill an enemy unit, and they usually required rebuilding after a battle. However, the point of their existence wasn't to win battles, but stall the enemy long enough for Tropican armies to arrive where they needed to. Of course, uprising and internal rebellions would not be easily halted by such a placement, considering that their target tended to be the palace, the one building a player absolutely had to have in order to stay in the game.

"Oh no, I have to insult the king too," Eddy said, amused. "Whatever shall we do? Now it's telling us to name an animal after the king."

"Go with the anteater."

"Okay. Whoa, he's pissed. Oaksworth just kept me from being tortured horribly in the castle dungeons."

"What, really?"

"Yep. And he's ripped five months off my mandate. Ouch. All for referencing his apparently ginormous nose."

"Considering that a few members of other species tease ponies over our supposedly long faces, I can sympathize," Shining said. "Not with the torture part, though."

"Hmm. And, I get an extra year because that brought me down to five months before they came and dragged me out of office."

"Can't you just fight with what you have if you run out?"

'Nope. Somehow, no matter how big your army is, the game just ignores that if you run out of time and just ends your rule; no chance to fight, no saying 'Oh, you're removing me from power? I declare independence!'"

"Isn't that unrealistic?"

"Well, that would make it too easy. You have to gain the support of your people in order to declare independence. Anyone can build an army, but it's harder to build up popular support, which is the main challenge."

"I can testify to that. Even though the Princesses are loved by most ponies, unfortunately other officials aren't always as popular. Had to step in to stop a mob from attacking Manehattan's mayor the other day; it seems that he was accused of stealing from the city's funds, although we've found nothing resembling proof that that actually happened, and it may have been misinformation leaked by one of his political rivals. Mind you, they came all too close to storming his mansion outside of town."

"You didn't have to arrest anyone, did you?"

"No, but like I said, it was close. Since they hadn't actually harmed anypony, we let them off and promised to investigate the matter, in cooperation with the city's own local police force. Nothing as of yet, but it shows that Equestria isn't always as tranquil as we wish it was."

"I hope there's no more trouble."

"Me too. You have no idea. How's everypony's army doing, by the way? Whatcha got?"

"I have a couple Forts and a bunch of Guard Towers everywhere, maybe about twenty, twenty five personnel in total," Leon said.

"I've got one Fort and a tower at each corner of the palace," Eddy replied.

"I have three Forts and a couple Guard towers," Luna said. "Better to build more forts than towers, if you want more units."

"I have two, and a lot of towers spread out over my city."

"I hope you have the money to pay for them," Leon said.

"Yep. Four plantations and five ranches."

"Nice."

Leon set down a grocery and a newspaper in his own town, and began construction on another plantation of his own, this one for making bananas, and another ranch to go with it. By now, he was making some pretty decent money off of imports, so the army wasn't as much a problem as it might have been.

"Mission to build a lighthouse; not bad," Eddy commented. "More trade routes."

"Oh, need to appoint a new general," Leon said as he too got a mission. "Revolutionary or royalist? I wonder which one I'll pick," he added sarcastically. After choosing to put a revolutionary in charge of the army, he built a final Guard Tower, this one in the center of the town, not far from the palace. Can't wait 'til I can upgrade them to machine guns.

"Aw great, getting invaded by pirates," Eddy said, irritated. "Great, now they'll probably wreck a plantation I put down. mental note; next time, build more forts... and more guard towers, in more places."

"Can't you stop them?"

"Nope, not unless they come near my palace and the towers there. I'm going to lose some buildings."

"At least they won't be able to kill you."

"Yeah, but... uh oh," the British player said as the in-game day turned dark.

That event heralded the arrival of three tornadoes, which spawned in the middle of the island and began to whirl their way toward the outer rim.

"Oh dear," Luna groaned as one of them swirled over a plantation of hers. "No no, please, don't... ugh," she muttered as the plantation collapsed under the force of the attack.

"No! My forts!" Shining cried out as one of them was destroyed.

"Ha ha ha, that's right, destroy my housing, like I care... NO! Not my plantations!" Eddy yelled.

"Oh great," Leon mumbled as two ranches were wiped out. "That's just great."

The tornadoes ripped through the land, tearing and destroying as they went. Two of them whipped right past one another, as though high-fiving, before they all disappeared.

"That was unexpected," Eddy grumbled. "Not to mention unwanted."

"Agreed," Luna said. "Perhaps this is the time to call our session to a close. I have some important business that I have to take care of, anyway."

"Good game tonight, chaps," Eddy said. "Hopefully the next session will be as good."

"I have a feeling it will," Leon replied. He got off the game, got out of his chair, and stretched. It was nice to have friends, even when you couldn't see their faces, for at least they were there.

Author's Note

I've seen several failed kerbal rockets on Youtube (and failed some myself in the demo I got), and I've struggled over whether laughing at an accident where a kerbal died (especially if they were afraid and part of the rocket exploded beforehand) is okay. Am I a bad person?

Edit; *Note, this was true at the time. Since then, the Supermax Prison was added, which DOES let you jail people. Jailing anyone other than criminals and rebel leaders still causes unrest, though.

R.U.S.E., Game 1; Rushin' front

"And... here we go," Leon whispered to himself as the others connected.

"All right! The Dash has arrived!"

"Humble as ever, Rainbow Dash," Luna said, but she sounded amused.

"What can I say, it's me."

"Leon, did you contact Edward?"

"Yeah, I did. He's out with the flu today. And his parents are strict when it comes to dealing with sickness."

"Curses. I would have enjoyed the Civilization; Beyond Earth bonanza we would livestreamed later."

"Me too." Leon sighed. Although an ocean away from the Briton, he felt quite close to him... and to Luna and others. "I hope he recovers, and soon. I've had the flu a few times, and it's not fun, to put it mildly. We still have this time to play, though, and don't think he'd like us to just sit here doing nothing while he recovers." He knew Eddy well enough to know that was true. The Englishman could be quite crude in regards to language (though now that he thought of it, Leon knew the same applied to him) and he might be easy to anger (another trait they had in common), he was a true blue friend.

"And just what are we playing?"

"R.U.S.E. A World War II strategy game," Leon answered. "It's pretty good, though sadly the follow up Wargame series never touched the Xbox, or any console. Which is... well, a gaming console is designed entirely for entertainment. Computers have to balance between programs for work, security, and play. They're missing out on a good sale, that's for sure."

"Thanks for the description, but I already know what it is. I've got it."

"Regardless of marketing, I think it's good enough as it is for us to play," Luna added. "I'll invite the party to a game."

Leon accepted the invite when it came. He arrived at the set up screen.

"Now, the Xbox edition of this game unfortunately does not have 3v3 battles, which is ridiculous. But we only have four players who will be here in the end, so that's fine. I'll invite... er, who would be a good candidate?"

"Shining Armor?" Leon suggested.

"No; sadly, he's out on assignment," Luna said regretfully.

"How about Twilight?" Rainbow asked. "She just got on."

"That would work. I'll do it."

After about thirty seconds, Twilight did, in fact, join. "Hi, everypony!" she said cheerfully.

"Good evening, Twilight Sparkle," Luna greeted her. "It is good to hear from you again."

"Sorry that I haven't sent any letters over the past few days," Twilight said, apologetically. "I've been busy with Nightmare Night preparations."

"Understandable." Luna giggled. "I can't wait to make my appearance this year. Anyway, we'll be playing on teams, not free for all. It's harder to beat up on one player that way, and makes it impossible to establish makeshift, disposable alliances. The question is, who is going to be on each team?"

"I'll play with Leon," Rainbow said. "I don't think we've played on a team much."

"And I'll be go with Princess Luna," Twilight confirmed.

"Right. That takes care of that issue. We'll play on the map Center of Gravity, if there are no objections. Now we have to decide which era to go for."

"We could go nuclear," Leon suggested.

"No," Luna said firmly. "I still remember the last game we played on that setting. I'm not eager to try it again."

"1939?"

"There's jack-all to play with," Rainbow protested. "I vote for 1945."

"I think that's best too," the Princess agreed. "And the game time..."

"I think sixty minutes would be okay," Twilight said.

"Alright. All that's left to do is pick our nations and start the game."

Leon chose France. France was very defensive, which was perfect considering his preference for defense. Their armor wasn't too bad, either, though Germany undoubtedly had the best. In 1939, the B1 Bis was superior to the Panzer III, as it's armor was generally sufficient to allow it to survive long enough to inflict massive damage. Of course, a German player could always throw Stukas at the problem...

He was surprised to see that Rainbow went for Italy. Italy stereotypically had the worst units in the game, although they were cheap to produce, and their upgrades weren't half bad. It wasn't the most optimal to build an air force; that fell to Germany and the United Kingdom, which was unlike Rainbow, as she loved to build air units.

Luna chose to play as the British; Twilight opted for Germany. That didn't surprise Leon; she loved to have the best units on the field. German units were very expensive, though, so a German player was vulnerable to running low on money if their economy was attacked. Luna's choice for Britain was solid enough, though British armor wasn't as good.

"Is everyone ready?" After receiving confirmation from everyone, Luna went on, "Then I'm starting the game."

Leon hit start, as did the other players; he also switched to game chat. The image switched to a loading screen for a moment, then he was watching as the camera went around the map a bit before focusing on his headquarters.

"Alright, Rainbow, what are you going to do?"

"Well, I'm kinda new to Italy, but I heard that there was this really great thing called the Italian tank rush."

Leon nodded. It was a good idea... when R.U.S.E. was new and in beta, when people were just discovering what was in the game. Italian M13s were garbage, but they were cheap, as were the tank they could be upgraded and replaced by, the M15, which was considerably better. It was easy to build a dozen of them at the beginning of the game, along with an Autoblenda, which was a recon unit. The more tank-constructing buildings you built, the faster they could be made. A Soviet player might have one KV-1 out by that time; it would wreck two, maybe three, M15s, but the rest would pound the tank into scrap metal. It would be the same thing with most nations; the USA could rush out a mess of Stuart tanks, and the Japanese could spam Ha-go tanks, but the latter were even worse that M13s; in fact, they were arguably the worst tanks in the game, which explained why the could be bought for only five dollars, as opposed to the M13 and M15's 15 dollars.

By now, though, people had figured out how to counter attacks like that... and were learning how to make better rushes. Infantry could be spammed into forests and towns to counter them, and anti-tank guns could be positioned in forests to pick off any tank that came too close. Even adding a recon unit to a rushing army couldn't make the offensive invincible, though at times they came pretty close. And, if the enemy so chose, they could hit the advancing tanks with dive bombers; it was one reason why Leon hated Stukas, unless, of course, they were on his side. Their attack was made all the more annoying by the fact that they would look as if they were going to crash into the ground, but almost never did, unless they were destroyed in the act of diving by anti-aircraft fire.

"Just be careful. Twilight knows you even better than I do, and she has Stukas," he said aloud as he placed some Supply Depots and an anti-tank factory.

"I can rely on you for air cover, can't I?"

Leon sighed through his nostrils. The French weren't the best off when it came to aircraft; they had a fighter, which could be upgraded, as well as a light level bomber and a moderately good dive bomber. Their firepower was mostly ground-based, particular in their anti-air/anti-tank bunker and their Maginot bunker, which were both strong against tanks.

Then again, acting out of character can surprise any enemy... "I can, but my air force isn't the best for ground support. I'd do better supporting from the ground myself."

"Don't either of us have one of those things like the Germans have? You know, one of those tank things with flak cannons."

"You mean Flakpanzers?"

"Whatever."

"Well, yeah, as a matter of fact I have a super tank that has anti-air guns, but they're too expensive for the early game."

"Rats. Well, can you build paratroopers?"

"Too risky without already having scouted them first. I'll build Somua 35s. They're part artillery."

"Okay."

Leon camouflaged his base, and saw that Rainbow had done the same. He set up a tank base of his own, and began researching the Somua 35, which was able to act like light artillery, as he'd said. Rainbow had built three supply depots as well as two tank bases. She was staking her chances on an early, winning blow.

"We went to a rodeo that came to town today," the blue pegasus said. "Applejack was competing in it, so we went to watch her."

"How did she do?"

"She won quite a few blue ribbons, but they were pretty close. After she won, she challenged the crowd, asking if any of us were willing to compete against her."

"Let me guess; you were the first to volunteer."

"Heck yeah! I couldn't let her think it was a one horse town. Unfortunately, I kinda forgot a few of the things that were required."

"Such as?"

"I had to wear horseshoes, as in the ones that have to be nailed on. Not that it hurt at all, but it don't like ponies touching my hooves. I also had to wear a saddle, which was so uncomfortable! I mean, I'm a pegasus! And that thing covered my wings. Do you know how it feels to basically have two of your limbs tied up?"

"I thought you'd done that before, though."

"Well, not like this. Actually, it was more that they were entirely covered than just tied up. Even with ropes around them, they could move a little; with this, I could hardly move them at all. Last, but not least... I had to wear a bridle. That felt... humiliating, or at least embarrassing."

"Guess it's not easy, considering you don't wear them much. And knowing you, you were a pretty good match for her anyway. All you would have needed were some reins, and you would have been going full tack."

"Yeah, and... hold on, I am no human's saddle horse. I will never sit there and ask kids if they want me to give them a ride on my back. Got that?"

"Okay okay!" Hoping he could divert her anger, he asked, "Why were you reluctant to agree to go with the horseshoes if they didn't hurt? I saw the episode where you cringed at the spa when a mare went to file your hooves."

"Well uh... Okay, I guess this had to come out sometime. But you have to promise not to tell anypony."

"I promise." Leon looked at her army. So far, four M15s had rolled off the assembly line. As Rainbow had initiated radio silence, the enemy wouldn't know what kind of units she was producing, though anyone could make a guess.

"This one time, I went down to the spa as a filly, before we all became friends and all that. I was still an... active child then, but I wanted to try it out."

"And?"

"Everything went fine, until they got to the hooficure part. They. Messed. It. Up. Big time! I was left with something resembling... I don't even know what, and I probably don't even want to know. I was so embarrassed, I went and bandaged my leg up and made up a story about how I'd broken my leg in a hoof fight."

"You basically tried to erase the whole thing from your mind."

"Yeah, but that day when my friends invited me to join them, it came rushing back. And, P.S.; if you ever tell this story to anyone, I'll find you."

"Wow. I didn't think you'd be willing to kill me for something like that."

"What? No! I wouldn't go that far! But you really wouldn't like what would happen. Trust me."

"Alright. FYI, you could have had me Pinkie Promise."

"And how am I supposed to know you're actually going through the motions? I can't even see you. And, in my opinion, it's just not the same as when somepony makes a Pinkie Promise in person."

"I can understand that." Leon began building his own tanks.

"Why don't you just build B1s? They have better armor."

"And they are slow. S, L, O, W, slow. If this were 1939, I'd build them anyway, because one B1 is worth several Panzer IIIs, but 1945 is just way too late. And even in 1939, they're vulnerable to Stukas."

"Yeah; I just love using those things."

"I have a different opinion. And air units require too much micro management for my taste."

"Yeah, I guess. But being on the ground is like having a giant bulls eye painted on you."

"If some of those bulls eyes are on Flakpanzers, you'll have your work cut out killing them."

"Heh. I hate having to go up against those things. Hmm, how many tanks do you think we'll need?"

"Twenty each, I'd say, but mine are more expensive."

"Okay, well, I'm halfway there. I can't wait to... wait, I can't see her face. Darn it! But still, I want to surprise her, real bad, at least once."

"And why her in particular?"

"Because she's so smart, and thinks she knows everything there is to know; she acts like a mastermind, you know what I mean?"

"You mean like someone who manipulates the enemy into doing what they want?"

"Yeah! For once, that's gonna be me."

"We'll see about that. At least you're making tanks fast, so that's something."

Rainbow giggled. "They're gonna be so shocked when I just plow through their one or two tanks and wreck their base!"

"Don't be surprised yourself if it doesn't go that way. By now a lot of players have figured out that Italy equals a rush."

"That won't help them if I throw more than they've got at them."

"Well, we'll see."

"Well Twilight Sparkle, what do you think our strategy should be?"

"Princess, you're the one in charge of running a country. Shouldn't you make the decision?"

Luna couldn't help smiling a little. "Your reasoning is flattering, but please do not consider me a Princess here; just think of me a friend. And besides, your brother married Cadence, which ties you into the royal family. You have as much right to make decisions in the game as I do."

"Umm, okay. Well, Rainbow usually loves to build air, and she's... well..."

"Aggressive?"

"Yes. Her first reaction to being attacked is to hit back. So we can count on her to attack, persistently if not blindly. I was surprised she chose Italy, considering their air force isn't as good as Germany or the UK."

"Tell me, Twilight, if you wanted to build a lot of cheap units very quickly, which nation would you chose?"

"Probably Italy. Or Japan, considering their armor isn't very good either and therefore comes cheaply as well. So I'd bet on a rush."

"That is what I was thinking. M13s, or perhaps M15s. And what of Leon?"

"I'm not so sure about him. He's not so obvious. He usually tries to do what his specific nation does best, but he can sometimes pull off a big surprise that catches us off guard. I'd advise caution, and build reconnaissance planes."

"Yes. The fact that they've already camouflaged their bases makes the job of finding out their plans rather infuriating, especially if they decide to put anti-air units and bunkers in positions to counter our reconnaissance."

"I'll start building anti-tank guns."

"I'd advise building Panzer IIIs as well. When you're in a cheap tank battle, every unit counts."

"I'll do that. But she'll be able to build as much as I can, if not more. And I know she'll probably go after me. I'm the town 'egghead' after all." That last was said with some irritation.

"Trust me, Twilight Sparkle, there is nothing wrong with being intelligent. We all have traits that are sometimes difficult to overcome when faced with certain traits of others, but you've done it time and again. Given your success recently in protecting Equestria, I'd say you've largely defeated that problem."

"I know, but it's so frustrating sometimes. Nopony wants to date somepony with brains."

"I know the feeling. It is a sad factor in life, but fate shall one day bring you success. Be confident, Twilight."

"Okay. Thanks, Princess."

"You are most welcome. Now, about the problem at hoof..."

"I'm going in," Rainbow reported. "Cover me."

"With pleasure. Remember to keep radio silence on the regions we cross."

"Please, Leon, I'm not as forgetful as you."

"Forgetful!?! Who do you think you're talking to?"

"Eh hem..."

Flashback

"This rocket will NOT fail to get into orbit at least," Leon said.

"It looks pretty well put together," Eddy admitted.

"That thing looks like a giant bundle of asparagus," Rainbow Dash said, giggling. "I'd eat it."

"Ha ha. Well, you can laugh out the other side of your mouth," Leon replied heatedly. "Jeb isn't going to die this time."

He activated the rocket, which did actually start to rise... without the outer three engines, which all took off in different directions. Rainbow laughed loudly as the four individual rockets raced into the atmosphere.

"You forgot the space tape, didn't you?" Rainbow said between breaths.

"So what? The contract says I just have to-" Leon stopped as the engines overheated and exploded, leaving him with no propulsion whatsoever.

"Uh oh," Eddy said.

"Come on, come on! Detach, detach, detach!" Leon mashed the spacebar desperately as the rocket began to lose altitude.

"You forgot the parachute," Luna noted.

"No, no, NO!" Leon started to panic as the rocket started to approach the ground. "Well, time for an EVA if ever there was one." He quickly had Jebidiah go out on an EVA, hoping he could save the pilot from being destroyed with his craft and relying on the Kerbal's jetpack to put him on the ground safely.

It didn't happen. The jetpack did nothing but slightly slow Jeb down. He crashed into the ground and exploded into a green puff.

Rainbow was now coughing from laughter. Luna was giggling, clearly trying to hold it in. Eddy had joined Rainbow and was guffawing loudly.

"Ha ha," Leon repeated. "Let's see you guys do any better."

End of flashback

"Okay, twice in a row in the space of a few minutes doesn't make someone, quote unquote, 'forgetful'. It's not like CKII, where people have traits posted on them like medals."

"No, but that was hilarious. Next time, remember the space tape!"

"Fine, fine. Now do you want me to support you, or not?"

"Yep. Just bring your tanks along with mine."

"I think it would be best if I tried to tackle her base from a different direction. That way, she'll have to break up her forces, and we'll crush her."

"Oh, come on, if we hit them with a big, united force, we'll crush them anyway! It's not like artillery can pick off tanks in this game."

"...fine. Just don't blame me if this doesn't work." With that, Leon sent his tanks to help Rainbow's.

Twilight carefully set up some Pak 36 anti-tank guns in the woods near her base. She was rather interested in the history of the units in the game, and was surprised to learn that the Germans had come to call that particular gun a "door knocker" in their language, and hoped they would be able to do some good here.

"So, has anything happened in Ponyville recently?" Luna asked.

"Oh, yeah! Today, there was a rodeo in town. Applejack competed in it, and she got quite a few blue ribbons."

"I imagine there were a few humans there?"

"Oh, yes. Some of them offered to be participants in the bronco buck." Twilight giggled. "Most of them were surprised to be dismounted so quickly."

"Hmm. I know that some ponies are nervous about humans, considering that horses in their world are used daily as riding animals and livestock, and fear that some of them might try to use us the same way."

"If any of them have, I haven't seen it or heard of it. Most of them were good sports about it; they were largely from the American state of Texas, and had a great deal of experience in their own rodeos. Like I said, I don't think it prepared them for a rodeo where the mounts in the bronco buck were as smart as they were."

"I hope any that were in the crowd were of similar make."

"They were; they were mostly the families of the Texans."

"Ah, good. For the most part, humans have given us the same level of respect as we give them, but sometimes, I worry, given their own horses and ponies."

"Well, again, they haven't done anything like that yet. And, moving on, if I may, Rainbow couldn't help going into the ring against Applejack. She wasn't impressed with all the required gear, but she went along with it."

"Ah. Which of them came out better?"

"The jury is still out on which of them is the better athlete; it was pretty much a draw, given the time available."

"I hope neither of them got hurt from their horseplay."

"No, but both of them got a lot of dirt on their fur. Rarity was careful not to get too close to them afterwards."

"And how is Fluttershy been recently? I haven't heard from her, and she isn't the most consistent gamer."

"She's been nursing a family of baby birds that lost their mother," Twilight said, her voice becoming somber. "She's been hit really hard by the mother's death, even though she did everything she knew how to do."

"Ohhhh," Luna hummed in sympathy. "Did you tell her that she has to stay strong for the young ones?"

"Yes. She did buck up a little after we told her that, but it was still a downer to see her so sad."

"Death is a sad subject. Believe me, I can sympathize." There was a sorrowful tone in Luna's voice. Something told Twilight it went beyond the birds' mother. "Yes, well... can you see any of their units?"

"Uh... No. If they built any, they must be using radio silence."

"That's worrisome. And since we don't know which sectors they activated Ruses in, we can't be sure just where their units will be."

Twilight suspected Luna had changed the subject due to some other reason than the game, but she wasn't going to argue with that. "I could send up a recon plane. Maybe they aren't going to- Oh," she said as an Italian tank came into view. three more tanks came after it, along with an Autoblenda. "Uh oh," she said, with some measure of worry as more tanks came into view; one of them was a Somua 35.

"Indeed," Luna said. "The attack has begun."

"Uh oh, they just detected the tanks," Leon said as their units stopped looking transparent.

"Big deal. They couldn't have built anything that can stop us."

"You sure?" Leon asked as several anti tank guns in the woods, now exposed by the Autoblenda, fired, destroying the forward-most tank.

"Aw, rats. Still, they'll be gone in a minute. We have enough to keep hittin' 'em. It would have nice if you'd gotten more than seven or eight tanks of your own."

"The French are better defenders than attackers. I didn't expect you to try rushing them, I thought you were going to harass the heck out of them with your air force, like you usually do. You love the units that are fastest."

"Yeah, well, I wanted to try something new. Don't judge me!"

Another tank exploded. Leon directed his own tanks at the enemy guns. The cannons of the French vehicles pounded the site. One of the anti tank guns blew up, followed by another.

"Planes!" Rainbow shouted in warning.

Leon quickly turned his camera. Luna had launched several twin engine planes... but they weren't bombers. Instead, they began dropping men in a town that ran through the forest.

"Aw, nuts," Leon groaned. Tanks couldn't drive through forests, though they could shoot into them. The tanks had no choice but to proceed through the town; as the view range of ground artillery was limited, the paratroopers Luna had dropped would have the first shot on the tanks, while Leon's own units wouldn't be able to fire on them until they were spotted. The only other option would be to take a detour, which would take time and allow Twilight and Luna to build more units and counter the attack. "Well played, Luna, well played," he added, half in frustration, half admiring.

"Yeah, but what do we do now?"

"Full speed ahead. I'd say delay would be even worse than the immediate losses we'd suffer. Every second we give them is one they can use to train more units, and we don't want that."

"Okay then, going for the town."

Of course, Leon hadn't been completely idle while the army they'd built went forward. He had set up an airbase, and was researching paratroopers of his own. It would take a minute or so, though. He also gave orders to set up an artillery and anti-air base, hoping to get some artillery out. It wouldn't come in time to help the current battle, though. Hopefully, the rush, regardless of whether it succeeded, would give him and Rainbow enough buffer time to build up a considerable economy and army.

Sure enough, the first of Rainbow's tanks to drive through the town square was vaporized by PIAT fire from British Paratroops. The second and third met similar fates. The fourth was able to fire once before being blasted as well. But by now, more tanks were coming into the square, and their combined fire, along with those of Leon's own tanks, wore down the morale of the British units, which finally began to die off. They died hard, but they died.

"Ugh, that was a bummer," the blue pony sighed. "Lost about one tank in every four before that was over."

"Well, we're through it now," Leon said. "Maybe they don't..."

A plane dropped out of the sky, releasing a bomb from it's swept back wing design. An M15 went up in smoke.

"What the...!"

"Twilight must have an airbase somewhere," Leon noted. "We have to hurry before flocks of these things start coming down on us!"

"Hurricane!"

"I know you played that part in the pageant, but I don't see h- oh," he finished deadpan as a British Hurricane fighter-bomber attacked the column with rockets, destroying one of his own tanks. "That kind of Hurricane."

"Yep. Come on!"

Pickett's Charge, re-enacted by tanks, Leon thought as they continued on.

"Oh no, this is bad," Twilight said in a panic. "I thought that would have delayed them longer than it did."

"Me too. I had my hopes that elite infantry in a town might stop their offensive."

"What do we do now?"

"Do not panic. We have fighter-bombers now. That will even the odds. And our own tanks will be ready to engage them."

"I hope you're right," the lavender unicorn said as Rainbow's tanks found one of her Supply Depots and destroyed it.

"All right! Got one!" Rainbow cheered.

"That's great, but don't forget... Uh oh."

"What? Oh," Rainbow said as she also spotted the oncoming force of Panzer IIIs. "Well, we can take 'em! Come on!"

The Panzer IIIs were good starting tanks, but against M15s, they weren't as good as they might have been. Three of them were taken out in quick succession. Still, there were a lot of them, and they began landing hits of their own before long. An orange flame lit above them; Twilight, or perhaps Luna, had activated the Fanaticism Ruse. The enemy tanks could still be destroyed, but they couldn't be routed. While individually no match for the M15s, there were enough of them to start inflicting casualties. A number of tanks on both sides blew up. In the meantime, Twilight and Luna sent fighter-bombers to attack while the two Tricolor nations were stuck in combat.

"They're using the tanks to distract us!" Leon cried out.

"Disengage your tanks; I'll keep them busy," Rainbow said. She too activated Fanaticism, and she sent her tanks into a full on, all out brawl.

Leon, with three tanks left, slipped around the battle. Perhaps the other team were too distracted by the main battle. Maybe they thought that three tanks weren't a threat. Whatever the reason, Leon succeeded in dodging the battle.

"Finally," he muttered as Twilight's base came into view. He smirked as he saw the airbase, with all the planes on it refueling and re-arming. This was going to be fun.

"What the?" Twilight exclaimed as she received notification that her planes were being destroyed. "How...? Oh, that sneaky little baaaaaaattle lover," she finished lamely.

"Thank you for refraining from using profane language," Luna said. "Although it was sneaky, I must admit."

"Never mind that! What do I do now?" Twilight asked in a panic as Leon's tanks destroyed her airbase completely.

"Hold on. I have Hurricanes heading your way. Just pay attention to the tank battle, and build some tanks and anti tank guns to counter Leon."

"Alright." Twilight forced down her panic. Come on, it's not like battling Changelings and magic-sucking monsters, it's a game.

Why do I feel so emotional about it then?

Leon targeted the anti-tank base. He chuckled as it went down.

One of his tanks got hit by a newly-built Panzer III. At the same time, one of them was destroyed by a Hurricane. He sent the remaining two to kill the Panzer III, which they did, but another tank was lost to air attack.

"Aw, crud," he said as his last tank exploded. "At least they had a good run."

"What, did you die?"

"Yep."

"Haven't seen any Stukas for a minute or so. I can't give you a thumbs up with hooves, but I could give you a thumbs up flag I guess."

"Unfortunately, I don't have anything at the front to help you. I'll try and bring in Paratroopers, but..."

"It's okay. I think I might be able to... blast, there's just too many of them, and Luna has her own tanks coming now!"

"Retreat. It's the best you can do at this point."

"Errrrmmm, well, alright, but I don't like it."

"There's nothing more we can accomplish here. We put a dent in their economy and wrecked their units, along with some of their buildings. I'd say that's a success."

"Yeah, but I wanted more."

"You can try to get more, but your army is going to die off fairly quickly."

Rainbow tried to withdraw. The main problem was that, even though Leon had produced a French fighter and had sent it to help, there were too many British fighter-bombers attacking, and some of them attacked the fighter, forcing it's withdrawal. The Panzer IIIs followed much too aggressively to allow Rainbow to disengage, and her last tank finally brewed up.

"That was a waste," she said. "I was hoping we could have wiped Twilight out of the game."

"Our tanks didn't get there fast enough, and we spent too much time setting up," Leon observed. "Next time we should build what we can in the first two or three minutes and then go."

"Yeah. Whoa, I have over four hundred bucks to spend."

"Didn't you just swear?"

"No. I don't know why you humans think that the word buck would be a swear word. I mean, yeah, it's one letter removed from one of your curse words, but our bad words are mostly the same."

"And you have mothers threatening to wash your mouths out with soap."

"Heh heh. Yep. My mother did that a couple of times."

"I thought one day for some stupid reason that my mother would find it funny if I swore in Breton. Apparently not; she didn't like it, even though it was a throwback to her birth country."

"Ha ha! Well, what do we do now with the money we have?"

"Prepare for the long run, I guess. We delayed their development, but unless we take advantage of it, it won't matter. I'm building some of my Fortified Position bunkers. Combined AA and AT."

"What about that really big French bunker?"

"It's only anti-tank and infantry; it'll do nothing against air power."

Leon went and built the bunkers, as well as a prototype base. Unfortunately, as he had been busy building his base when not focused on his units, he didn't have anywhere near as much money as Rainbow did. Of course, that meant her base wasn't as well developed, but she went to work, building a couple airbases and a couple bunkers of her own to protect them. She built Italian fighter-bombers (which were reasonably good) and sent fighters out to protect a forward base she was building around a Secondary Headquarters.

"Be careful that you're not overextending!"

"Oh, lighten up! It's in easy range of a couple Supply Depots, and I'm building these Italian bunkers all around it. We need a base close to them, and this is how you go about it. You're too defensive minded."

Leon opened his mouth, then shut it. She was probably right, he considered. Not that he was willing to admit that.

"Good, that's that out of the way," Luna said. "Now, for our own plans."

"What's your plan?" Twilight asked.

"I was expecting that you would have come up with something," Luna replied in a mildly surprised tone.

"But you're-"

"A fellow player," Luna interrupted. "Here, my rank isn't anywhere as important as the company I keep. You have a brilliant mind; I would like to see it in action."

"Well, okay. We're building up a lot of air power, so bombing and ground support are probably going to be decent to focus on."

"I wish we had more money to work with," Luna said. "Their rush, though it failed, required us to spend more money repelling it than I am comfortable with."

"Yeah. I don't have more than eighty dollars. Hmm."

Twilight decided to rebuild the Supply Depot that had been destroyed, as well as building a Secondary Headquarters beyond the forest that shielded her base; it would make a decent forward position.

"I am going to build toward the center of the map," Luna said. "Can you help protect it?"

"Oh, sure! I can do that."

"Good. We'll need to control the center if we're going to control the map and the battle."

Twilight sent out a recon plane to spy out what the other team were doing. "Oh, darn, it looks like Rainbow is thinking the same thing," she muttered as Rainbow's forward base came into view.

"Then we'll have to dislodge her quickly, before they build up a considerable position there."

"All we have are our air units and some of our starting tanks."

"Think of what they have left after their rush."

Twilight did, then nodded. "If that's the case, it might work. but they're building bunkers around that place."

"Hmm. Try to spy on her main base."

She did. The plane started taking fire from a ground position and was shot down before it could get out of range. The unicorn sighed, but the plane had revealed something important. "She isn't protecting her initial base very well."

"Then we'll strike there. Build another recon plane. I'll build air; you build whatever armor you can manage at this point, and we'll hit them with a real army, not the tin cans they sent at us."

Leon built several bunkers around his base, as well as three next to Rainbow's secondary base. He built several heavy artillery pieces, as well as numerous anti-aircraft guns to hold back any aerial assaults, which he was sure would come, considering the other side's superiority in aircraft.

Rainbow was doing her best to build up a massive air force of her own, She had three airbases, and well over a dozen aircraft of various types. She had all but forgotten her armor; having been thwarted once using tanks, she wasn't keen on using them again.

"Don't forget to send out recon!"

"Yeah yeah, mom, I got it," Rainbow replied. "Seriously, cool your jets."

"Interesting, considering neither of us chose a nation that uses jets."

"Whatever."

Leon sighed and kept building. He had built a Prototype factory and was building an FCM F1, the French mammoth tank he'd mentioned earlier. He had already produced an EBR, an advanced recon unit that could actually do some decent work against enemy tanks. It was currently guarding their left flank, but it was the only unit there. He'd asked Rainbow repeatedly to send a few of her own units there, but she kept saying she was too busy; she was too preoccupied in building up her air force.

His factory had just produced the monster tank when his EBR caught sight of an enemy ground unit; a Panther. And it wasn't alone; more Panthers and Flakpanzers followed it. An enemy recon plane started to approach that sector as the EBR fired, killing a Panzer III that was tagging along with them.

Eainbow Dash saw the danger and sent an upgraded fighter after it. That did no good; upon seeing the Italian plane coming, the recon plane skirted back behind the Flakpanzers, which quickly chewed the fighter up and destroyed it.

"Oh come on...! Well, have some of this!" With that, the cyan-coated pegasus sent an attack force of fighter-bombers and level bombers. The latter wouldn't do much damage, but they could influence the morale factor significantly.

The Flakpanzers, still moving forward, fired on the coming air units; they killed one before it could strike, but Rainbow had spaced them out so that most of their attacks would hit at the same time. Three of the anti-air vehicles went up in smoke; a battery of light artillery behind them got caught by the level bombers and were blasted to pieces.

"Ha! Easy-peasy." Rainbow stopped laughing when two of her fighter-bombers were caught by British fighters and shot down. "Okay, they really want to do this the hard way," she said as the recon plane came out again. It high-lighted the EBR, which was dispatched quickly by the Panthers.

"Shoot it down!"

"I can't! She'll just send it behind those anti-air tanks again, and there's more fighters coming to cover them!"

The recon plane came forward. Upon sighting the array of anti-air Rainbow had built up, it stopped, but from behind the line of tanks and Flakpanzers heavy artillery began to fire.

"Aw, crud," Leon muttered. "I hate that tactic. And every variant of it."

"What?"

"Using super tanks, anti air, recon planes, and artillery in that way. I know she's not using super tanks, but that's still pretty bad, and she's probably already building more at her base."

"What can we do about it, other than kick their teeth in?"

"it's designed to be an attack that'll counter everything you can throw at it. It's going to require that you throw away planes like crazy to beat it, especially with Luna's air cover."

"We'll see about that. Leave the air to me. I'm the only one on our team who actually has wings, after all."

Leon chose to let that remark slide. Instead, he moved his artillery more to the west. While the enemy units had disappeared after the EBR had been killed, he had a rough idea where they were. He was also sure what they were going to do, and why. It was too late to try to move ground forces to cover it; what he had was going to be slow, and Rainbow was mostly going air; Their few ground forces in the area would be no match for the army descending on them.

Leon sent up a recon plane of his own. After sighting the enemy force, his artillery opened fire. It would do no damage to the armor, but lightly-armored units accompanying them would be subject to their lethal shells. Rainbow attacked Luna's aerial units while her fighter-bombers hit the enemies on the ground. Three British fighters and a couple Panthers blew up, as did a Flakpanzer. However, she lost five planes doing this, and German artillery hit her base as the enemy recon plane returned.

Leon ambushed the enemy plane with two of his own. Luna sent three of her own fighters to kill his, but he did manage to destroy the thing before Twilight's artillery wrecked more than a couple buildings. He lost his own fighters in the exchange. Another British plane was shot down, by ground fire this time, but more were coming, including a British recon plane to make up for the one Twilight had lost. At least he got to see where the enemy cannon fire was coming from, and he had his artillery target theirs. Two of the enemy's own cannons died, but the rest refocused their fire on his own battery. A group of British level bombers blasted his remaining guns, reducing them to smoldering wreckage.

The battle was heating up quickly. Leon looked at the center of the map. He would have expected a secondary assault from that area, as the anti-air in that area would interdict the British planes, but except for a few planes that strayed slightly and were fired upon there was no action there. It wasn't what he'd expected after the rush had failed. He had planned for a slugging match in the center; his units, mostly anti-tank guns, infantry to guard them, and tank destroyers, were positioned there. He was reluctant to move the, for fear that the enemy would attack from that direction at some point, but he could see that he had no choice. They would be slow getting where they needed to, but if the other team's advance could be Stonewalled, maybe they could arrive in time to repulse the assault.

That would be a challenge. The lavender unicorns was sending replacements for units she lost. Luna was adding to the problem by dropping Paratroopers into the woods on that side of the map, which spelled doom for the few anti-tank guns there, which had no defense against anything other than armor. Those guns were chewed up by machine gun fire from the elite British troopers.

"That's a problem," Leon said, calmer than he felt.

"Don't worry, I've got it," Rainbow said. She didn't though; she was losing planes at a terrible rate, and she was going to have more and more trouble replacing them, as the enemy was attacking her Supply Depots. Bombers were starting to hit her base, aiming for her airbases. She had to split her remaining planes between attacking the enemy ground forces and stopping the bombers, and it was becoming clearer and clearer that it was impossible to pursue both objectives at once.

Not that she was struggling alone. Leon had a couple FCMs out, and sent them to try to guard the pegasus' base. His own planes, what few of them there were, helped protect Rainbow's airfields. However, he was not a player who focused on air power; most of his population points were occupied by buildings, including bunkers, as well as slow though potent ground units.

Leon knew the fight was lost when he saw an enemy Supply Depot construct on a build site on the right side of the map (from his point of view, anyway). The other side had enough resources to replace casualties, while his own side did not. Regardless of the circumstances, he smiled in a cocky way. The enemy would win, yes... but they would lose a lot of units doing it, and he and Rainbow would get a lot of experience points from this battle.

"We have them on the run!" Twilight said excitedly.

"We do," the Princess agreed. "That said, if this were a real battle..." She felt her mouth twitch as she regarded that thought. "Let's just be glad that this is only a game, nothing more."

"Yeah. How many more planes can you send? I've run into a couple Maginot bunkers and I'd like some help busting them."

"I can do that," Luna replied. "In fact," she added, smiling a little as she gave instruction to her bombers, "help is already on the way."

"Come on, come on," Rainbow said as she sent in another strike of fighter-bombers. The planes succeeded in killing a couple more tanks and a Flakpanzer, but were shot down themselves. "Darn it, those were my last fighter-bombers. All I have are fighters now. I need help!"

Leon decided it would not be the proper time to tease the pegasus about her pride. A Panther stumbled into range of the bunkers he had built, hastily, on that side of the map; the four combined 47mm guns inside those bunkers tore the tank to pieces. "If this were a real battle, I'd say it would be high time to retreat. But as we can't do that..."

"We fight harder."

That wasn't going to pull of a win here. However, they could still get a couple surprises in. Leon smiled as his FCMs killed two Panthers in quick succession. A hapless Flakpanzer wandered into range as well and was reduced to scrap in seconds.

More tanks continued to pour through, though. While several of them died, enough got through that the FCMs started to get worn down. Air strikes by British fighter-bombers finally finished them off after about sixty second of combat. Level bombers and artillery finished off the bunkers, paving the way for the ground assault.

Leon and Rainbow did what they could, but their lack of proper expansion and economic buildings left them with too little money to get resources very easily. Now that the enemy had reconnaissance on the ground and in the air, their base in the center of the map was being hit by artillery; it would be gone soon. Luna and Twilight kept up the pressure on the air and on the ground, with the latter deploying jet bombers to complement her forces. Buildings were destroyed one after another.

Leon sent a pair of light French bombers to Twilight's base as his own base was destroyed. As he hoped, she was too busy pounding his own forces into the ground to notice... until the bombers blew up one of her airbases, along with several Stukas that were clustered up on it. He enjoyed watching the grounded planes explode with their base. Luna sent a pair of fighters and shot down the bombers, which no longer had anywhere to land anyway, but the damage had been done.

The game was over in the next two minutes. All the other team had to do was hunt down the remaining units, which, with air units hunting them down and the total lack of any cover or Ruses whatsoever, wasn't hard.

The results weren't as bad as they could be. At least the battle was considered a minor defeat by the game, due to the fact that the enemy hadn't all that many more points than Leon and Rainbow.

"Aw, horsefeathers," Rainbow muttered. She and Leon switched to party chat.

"That wasn't a bad match, all things considered," Luna said.

"You're only sayin' that 'cuz you won," Rainbow said in a very low voice.

"Oh, don't sound so sour," Twilight anwered. "You did good. Just build more Administrative buildings next time."

"Got you good in that minute or two, Twi," Leon said.

"You did. But it was too little, too late."

"Yeah yeah, let's move on to the next game in the agenda, huh?"

The rest of the night went on quite well, as the four players won some and lost some.

Civilization; Beyond Earth, Game 1 (part 1); Indigenous lifeforms

Civilization; Beyond Earth, Game 1 (part 1); Indigenous lifeforms

"I'm glad to have this time with you tonight, my friends," Luna said as the others joined.

"So are we," Eddy agreed.

"Let's get started," Leon added.

All of them were playing the new game Civilization; Beyond Earth. It was their first time playing together, and none of them could wait to begin.

"So, it's Leon and Edward, me, Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity," Luna said, listing off the players. "This could be interesting."

"Fluttershy is still hesitant to get the game," Twilight said. "Mostly because of the whole 'killing aliens' thing."

"She'd think differently when Siege Worms and Krakens are trying their best to kill you off," Eddy mumbled.

"Yeah, the aliens are jerks early on," Rainbow said. "But I can't complain too much. After all, mid-late game is when they start losing out."

"Hmm. Speaking of aliens and another world, do you suppose that they'll have gems and other valuable minerals?" Rarity asked.

"I know they have Titanium and Gold," Luna said, "but gold doesn't give you money in this game, only culture."

"What? Really?"

"Yeah. In this game, energy is money," Leon said. "Kind of ridiculous. I mean, if I have to go out and buy something, what am I supposed to do? Carry a bunch of batteries in my wallet and exchange them for stuff? 'Sir, you gave me two double-As and a triple. It costs three double-As total.'"

Everyone snickered. "That would be rather strange and inconvenient at times," Rarity admitted, still giggling.

"It fits in with the futuristic setting of the game, though," Luna put in. "And yes, the aliens can be quite infuriating. But let's get to playing, instead of merely talking about it."

"The Princess is right," Rainbow agreed. "Are we going to gossip all night, or are we going to play?"

"Alright; I'm Franco-Iberia," Leon said. "Bonjour and Hola, everyone!"

"Wait, what am I supposed to use, then?" Eddy demanded. "There's no Britain or England or equivalent in this game!"

"You can play Polystralia."

"Aussies aren't British!"

"They're half-British. And probably the closest you're going to get."

"Nah. I'll play Slavic Federation. I won't be the only Englishman upset over this, though."

"A lot of people won't be happy that their countries either weren't included or were counted as part of one of the factions," Leon pointed out. "I doubt people in the Baltic States are going to like being included in a new Soviet Union in the game."

"No, and I doubt the Vietnamese or Japanese will like being held in bondage with China, either," Eddy finished. "At least Hutama speaks English."

"If you're both finished, I'd like to make my choice," Rarity interrupted. "Hmm. The Kavithan Protectorate looks flashy."

"I'll go for the Pan Asian Cooperative," Twilight said.

"Mouthful, and the color matches your fur," Eddy said.

"If we were on camera, I'd give you such a look right now," the violet unicorn said with some slight indignation. "But yes, the name is a little long. Let's just call it the PAC."

"Yep. I'll go with the ARC, then," Rainbow confirmed.

"And I'll play as Brasilia." Luna added. "I think that's it for the factions. What kind of world do we want?"

"Whatever the replacement for continents," Leon suggested.

"DItto," Eddy agreed.

"Okay. Now for us all to customize our factions."

Leon chose to go with Engineers, as an Arsenal and Tectonic Scanning. It was a combination that he liked; he preferred to kick off war with the aliens aright away, and have an extra unit for exploring. Some would say that the free Soldier unit was the weakest choice. That ignored the fact that that Soldier would then have the chance to level up before any unit established by other factions, unless they also chose that customization. A free worker wouldn't do much good if it's work was interrupted, or, worse, if it was killed by aliens. Tectonic Scanning would reveal resources that would normally be hidden, though he would still need the technologies to work those resources. As for Engineers... production was always good to have.

He had picked Franco-Iberia because he liked it's passive bonus; it would gain a free technology for every ten virtues developed. That would require a bit to fully unlock, but the rewards could be great.

When the loading screen finally gave him the option to start, he took a close look at the landscape. The tiles were mostly golden-brown, so he guessed the world was one dominated by plains. One of the tiles he would be able to land on was next to the sea, and he could see an algae resource nearby. A resource each of Tubers, Fruit, and Gold were all close at hand and could be worked within the city's three tile working radius; it would be a very good and rich city site, so he chose that spot to start out. His spaceship came out of the sky and assembled his capital city there, the Grand Metropolis of Le Coeur.

"What the?" Eddy said. "They really misspelled the name of this Russian city. I'll fix it."

"What are you-"

"You'll see it when you find me."

Leon frowned; he wanted to know just what Eddy had renamed his capital, but that would have to wait. He ordered his city to build an Old Earth Relic, equivalent to a Monument in Civ 5. He also sent out his starting Explorer and Soldier units, having them explore the tiles around Le Coeur. At once, the Explorer found a Resource pod, and he gave it orders to check it out the next turn.

His Explorer quickly found an Alien nest to the northwest when he moved it one tile in that direction. He frowned again; Explorers were weak; even Scouts from Civ 5 were stronger. Yeah, a bunch of guys with sticks are stronger than a guy with a gun and a moon rover. The point being that if the Explorer was attacked, it would most likely die. Moreover, the nest was covered with miasma, which, unless one was going with the Harmony affinity, was bad news, as units that went into it would suffer damage and eventually die if they weren't extracted, while aliens would actually heal in it. He took the Resource pod, which contained 20 Culture. His soldier found another next to the southeast, though this one had no miasma around it. On the next turn, he took that one as well; this one contained some Energy.

"Apparently I just captured a battery," he said.

"Yeah. I got to that only had energy," Twilight said. "At least the Culture is useful at this stage of the game. The Energy... not so much."

"When units cost something like 200 bucks plus, yes, it's a little silly to only get 30 Energy."

"We'd say Quid where I come from," Eddy remarked.

"Which literally means 'what'," Leon replied.

"Uh huh."

Le Coeur finished building it's Old Earth Relic, upon which he got a quest decision; it was whether he would prefer all Old Earth Relics to have free maintenance or provide +1 additional Culture.

Um, I kind of expected to pay maintenance when I built this, so extra Culture. He was now making four Culture per turn; 1 from his Headquarters and 3 from the O.E.R. He started building on a Worker.

An Alien Wolf Beetle wandered into range of his city. He blasted it; the missiles took off about a third of the aliens' health. Although dissatisfied, he knew honestly that, without defensive buildings, he could expect no better. While the aliens literally could do nothing to harm him at this point, as they weren't strong enough to destroy his city and he hadn't built any tile improvements yet, he didn't like the thought of them wandering around inside his territory.

A few turns later, his Explorer found an Alien Skeleton, which would provide a free Alien unit for him when it was excavated. Even though he was a Purity player, having a free unit that could go through miasma without taking damage - indeed, healing in it - was a bonus. He quickly sent the Explorer there and began excavating the Skeleton.

"So," Rainbow said, "Me and Twi are kind of new to this game. What's changed between the last game and this one?"

"Um, we are all on another planet hundreds of years in the future fighting aliens and getting stomped by Siege Worms," Eddy said deadpan.

"Yeah, we know that," Rainbow replied, with a little exasperation. "What I mean is, what's changed gameplay-wise? I mean, I know about the aliens, but not about other stuff."

"Ah. Well, internal trade routes are a lot stronger, providing both food and production for your cities, and both cities profit from them. You can now excavate stuff and you can send various satellites into orbit for all sorts of benefits. And, as you no doubt have already discovered, the tech tree is now a tech web. Finally, the policy system has been reorganized into four virtue trees; one for military power, one for growth, one for Culture and Science, and one for production. Oh, and the affinities. That's there, too."

"Okay. Sounds cool!"

"It is," Leon agreed. "Would you believe that some people call it a mod of Civ 5?"

"It runs on the same engine," Twilight reasoned. "But it's honestly a different game altogether, especially with all the changes you mentioned. It feels enough like the previous game for players to feel comfortable, but at the same time it adds a lot of new stuff. And besides, Civilization 5 became super popular when DLC started coming out, so if people wait a bit, they'll start seeing big changes that will make the game better."

"Exactly. I'm honestly tired of all the complaints," Leon said.

"You think you've seen complaints? There's not a day that passes when somepony doesn't criticize how Equestria is run," Luna told him. "A few have valid arguments, which me and my sister look into. But a lot of it is just, well, rubbish. A disproportionate of it comes from the nobility; I can start to see why so many human countries have done away with it."

"Let me guess; they need more excessively expensive bubble bath for their Olympic-sized bathtubs?"

Luna giggled. "I swear, I got one very similar to that a few weeks ago. Yes, most of them are that ridiculous, if not more so. I will never put into law a motion for 'peasant scum' to be put into their 'place'. I went straight to that noble's house and gave him quite a talking to."

"How come most of them feel that way?" Eddy asked. "I would have thought that even they would be able to tell which way the wind is blowing."

"You'd think so, but you'd be wrong," Twilight put in. "You forget, I lived in Canterlot most of my life; I've run into ponies like that all too often. Most of Equestria's nobility live there. Even at school, there were groups of foals from noble families. Some were okay; not all nobles are snobs. But more than a few of them formed... I don't want to say school gangs, but there's no other way to put it. Fortunately for me, they knew to stay away, as I was Celestia's student, but other kids weren't so lucky, and got picked on daily because of their low birth."

"Didn't Celestia try to stop it?"

'Of course she did! She still does, and with Luna helping, the school is becoming a better place. But she had, and still has, an entire country to run. She has to try to do that, which includes revising laws, being present at court, checking the economy, making royal visits to various towns and cities, as well as find time for the school. I'm not surprised that she enjoys the time off from her job that she gets."

"We're all trying to run a country at the moment," Eddy put in.

"This isn't the same, and you know it. The poor Princesses have to put up with this kind of stuff everyday, as do the ponies of lesser wealth, who obviously have it much worse, because they don't have the royal influence to repel transgression."

"Don't you count as part of the nobility now? Seeing as your brother married a Princess and all that."

"...I wish I could say with one hundred percent certainty that I did, but, well, Shining hasn't received the best reception from all the nobility. Prince Blueblood and the rest of his cronies like to talk about my brother as though he didn't deserve to marry Cadence, which he DID; they love one another, and the services they've done for Equestria more than qualify them to be together. I just wish that spoiled brats who never had to work a day in their lives would realize that."

"Kinda why we split from England," Leon said.

"Oh, don't start," Luna interrupted. You and Edward would never get done arguing over that."

"Sorry."

"Are you sorry as in really sorry, or sorry as in, "I'm sorry I can't continue with my antics?'"

"...I choose to skip my turn."

"Uh huh. I thought so." In spite of her serious tone of voice, Leon could detect a sense of amusement from her.

On screen, meanwhile, he received an alien Raptor Bug for free upon excavating the skeleton. His Explorer, without any further modules, would have to be sent back to the capital in order to excavate anything else. He began sending it on a roundabout route, so it could continue revealing the map. His Soldier found an alien nest, which was occupied by a Manticore, a ranged alien unit.

Better not get too close. Who knows how many other aliens are nearby?

A much worse problem came next turn. A Siege Worm crawled into shooting range of his city.

No! He blasted it with the city's defenses. It barely scratched the monster, which nonetheless went off in another direction once the turn went by. Those things could take a pounding, and massacre any early units they chose to move through. Which was more or less what it did; the Siege Worm didn't seem to care what was in it's way, so long as it reached whatever destination it had decided upon. It wasn't so much deliberately attacking units and cities as bulling it's way through them to reach it's chosen destination. Only Krakens did more damage than Siege Worms, at least among the alien units.

I so can't wait to go full Purity.

The next few turns weren't all that interesting. His Worker finished building; he sent it to improve the fruit.

"Oh, come on!" Rainbow moaned.

"What-"

"I was about to kill this alien nest, and all of a sudden all these stinking aliens come and surround my soldier! Now I'm gonna lose it for sure."

"We could restart."

"No way! I'm not letting this stop me. It's just so annoying."

"Hint," Leon said, "aliens will become aggro if you're within two space of a nest."

"Great. Could have used that info sooner, but at least I have a better idea of what to do later."

Leon didn't try to argue. He kept his own Soldier from going within two tiles of the nest as he edged around it. His Raptor Bug, able to move three spaces in total, found a yellow border in the south. "Eddy, I think I've found your northern border."

"Oh, yep. I see you. You want open borders?"

"Yeah. What do you want for it?"

"Friendship pact. Or cooperative, whatever."

Leon considered. He had no intention of going to war with anyone (well, maybe the aliens, but they didn't have cities or improved resources to capture) at the moment. Of course, Eddy would be free to build cities in his direction, which would benefit him and leave Leon with less space to expand. But he decided that the risk was worth the exploration. "Okay."

Eddy sent the request (which included open borders for both of them), which Leon accepted. On the next turn, he moved his unit into the territory of the Slavic Federation. "Meet the Russians," he said to himself.

"And Poles. And Latvians. And Siberians, and Ukrainians and... hell, I'm not going to list all of them. Come in and see for yourself."

Leon did.

"Well, what do you think? Did I correct the spelling for this town?"

Leon snorted in laughter. The capital of the Federation, formerly Khrabrost, was now titled Crab Roast. "Just make sure you have crabs, or whatever counts for crabs on this planet, to roast."

"Oh, believe me, Leo my boy, I will. In the meantime, we'll roast aliens instead. Already cooked a couple Wolf Beetles that got too close."

"You two don't seem to realize that there are other ways of dealing with the aliens than just killing them," Twilight interjected. "If what I've read on the forums is true, if you get an alien nest inside your borders without destroying it, the aliens will turn friendly, and whatever Xenomass the nest is on will be given to you, same as if you'd built the proper improvement."

"Tell that to Siege Worms and Krakens. Their favorite thing to do is kill workers and munch military units."

"A good Supersonic Fence can counter both problems, in addition to taking the choice to make your trade units invulnerable to aliens."

"Where's the fun in the game without fighting?"

"How can you get anything done if all you do is build units instead of buildings and wonders to go with them?"

"The aliens go out of their way to make trouble!"

"They wouldn't do that as much if you didn't attack them all the time!"

While Twilight and Eddy argued, Leon kept moving. With the fruit connected, he went after the gold. The fact that it was worthless except for culture still puzzled him. I seriously hope we don't try and blow our own planet to pieces, or whatever happened that made the people in the game have to move to another planet. I mean, what happened afterwards to society? Energy replacing gold as currency? Seriously?

Suddenly, a wild Kraken appeared just outside his capital.

No no no no NO! Get out of here! He blasted the beast with the city's defenses. Luckily, it moved away next turn, but he was getting annoyed - and very worried - with all the high strength aliens roaming around his city.

Le Coeur finished building a Colonist - a Settler - which he sent east. Assuming this planet has an 'east'. I have no idea how things we take for granted would be rocked on another world. It was unprotected at the moment, but he would receive a free Soldier when the Colonist founded an Outpost. He was also sending his Explorer up to provide some form of protection.

He promptly got a quest decision the next turn; whether to contain an outbreak of Earth plants (Harmony) or to let it spread (Purity and Supremacy). He chose the latter, aiming for a level of Purity soon.

"...could see it as survival of the fittest; they can't survive, their tough luck."

"That's the most biased form of 'survival of the fittest' I've ever heard! It's hardly survival when you're using guns and advanced technology to kill them all!"

"Are you two going to argue this point the rest of the night?" Luna asked. "Unfortunately, I do not have unlimited free time, and none of you do either. If you want to waste the time I have with you, that falls on your heads, not mine."

Ed and Twilight abruptly fell silent.

"That's better."

The next few turns played out fairly well. Leon's Colonist was left alone by the aliens. He set it on a hill tile in the east that bordered water in the east and a mountain to the west. When he hit the button, the outpost started to grow. Unlike in Civilization 5, the Colonist did not instantly transform into a city, complete with six border tiles. Instead, it gradually grew into a city, absorbing one tile at a time. Only after all six surrounding tiles were absorbed did the Outpost turn into a city. He did get a free Soldier unit, as he'd hoped for. That was useful for scouting, as well as for fending off the aliens.

As though thinking of them conjured them up, an alien Wolf Beetle walked to within two tiles of his newly founded Outpost. Frustrated, he sent his soldier to block it. The turn after, he attacked the alien. The combat results weren't very much in his favor - 33 damage suffered, compared to 40 inflicted - but it was to be expected from early game units. Combat Rovers did even worse, as they were effectively glass cannons; high attack power, low defense. Naval units were even worse in that respect. High affinity ships could kill one another in one shot, sometimes two. Krakens usually found ways to survive into the endgame as well, attacking ships whenever they saw fit to do so. Gunboats, the starting naval units - assuming one immediately went for the tech that allowed for naval transport - were infamously weak and vulnerable to all sorts of catastrophes. In fact, Leon had come up with an apt name for them; Kraken Food.

The alien counterattacked on it's turn, though it's only achievement was to beat up on his Soldier some more and suffer even more damage itself. The icon on it's head was still green, so he supposed he hadn't warranted the aliens' aggression quite yet.

He finally got the decision to take a level of Purity or Supremacy, in regards to his choice to allow the Earth plants to grow free. He chose the Purity decision, which immediately made his Explorer units invulnerable to aliens and gave an upgrade for his Soldier units, which now became Marines. He gave them a bonus to combat strength, as opposed to plus five health healed per turn.

"Ugh, can't wait to get rid of all this miasma," Rainbow said suddenly. "It's really uncool how many tiles near me have that stuff."

"If you go Harmony," Twilight answered, "you'll eventually end up healing in miasma, instead of taking damage from it."

"Yeah... I don't think so. Why would I replace my hoof with a crab claw, or my tail for some sort of vine-thing?"

"It's just a game."

"And I don't want my people in the game to be some sort of nature mutants. Buuuuuuut thanks for the offer."

"Fine."

"Supremacy is where it's at," Eddy put in. "If you don't want to become a native lifeform, there's always becoming a cyborg."

"Half robot. No thanks; I'd prefer not to be enslaved to a central city computer."

"But it's so much fun! Your mind is kept constantly in video-game and telly land while your body is doing all the hard work."

That actually started a giggle from the blue pegasus. "I guess that wouldn't be that bad. But I'm leaving my options open."

With a Marine instead of a soldier, Leon felt that he now had a significant advantage over the alien that had come near the outpost. Although the Marine hadn't healed, it was still stronger. The alien unit died under the weight of the assault.

The next few turns went well. He succeeded in building a Trade Depot, so he could immediately build some trade units. However, considering that they would be subject to alien attack without having built a Supersonic Fence first, he started on that instead. He also queued up a Ranger, which was the first ranged unit of the game, similar to an Archer from Civ 5.

He continued moving is other Marine through Ed's territory. The Englishman was having alien problems as well. However, he'd been more liberal in building units than Leon had; he sported a couple of Marines and a Ranger already, and Leon knew he all too likely had other units hanging around somewhere.

"Supremacy already?"

"Aye. You got Purity already?"

"Yep."

"Going to be hard to keep up with your tea time if you're half-robot."

"Actually, no; there's a mandatory hour when we just stop what we're doing have tea. Then everyone goes back to doing whatever they were doing beforehand."

"Sounds kind of like that Asterix comic where Asterix goes to Britain."

"You mean the one where Caesar makes it policy for his legions to attack the British only at five o' clock and on Sundays?"

"Right on."

"Yeah, kind of. I'm surprised you know about it; I wasn't aware they sold across the pond."

"They do, but you usually have to look in a dedicated comic store."

"Ah."

"Ugh, these aliens are going out of their way to cause trouble," Rarity said. "I've been hard pressed by this nest that spawned outside my borders, and aliens keep emerging from it, and I can't go and destroy it because there's just too many of them. I was barely able to get a Colonist out; the Soldier guarding it was nearly killed."

"Build more units," Eddy suggested.

"And miss out on building up my city?"

"If you can't get the most out of your tiles, your faction is going to stagnate," Twilight reasoned. "Although I'm in favor of Harmony... How many tiles is it away from your Capital?"

"Three, and I doubt I'll have the money to buy it any time soon."

"Well, build what you have to kick them out. Supersonic Fence is a must."

"Thank you, Twilight dear."

Eddy spent the next turn firing on aliens; two Wolf beetles were killed by his units. A Raptor Bug was left critically injured, and Leon's Marine happened to be right next to it, so he did Eddy the favor of clearing out the bug.

"Hey! Who's been killing aliens?" Twilight demanded.

"Why should we care?" Eddy asked.

"Because their icons all just turned orange."

"Oh. Yeah, that could be a problem."

"Ok, I say that until the next five turns have passed, nopony attack aliens," Rainbow suggested.

"Oh, bother," Rarity murmured. "I'd hoped to clear them out. I suppose their turning orange means they'll be more aggressive?"

"Yes," Twilight answered, not amused.

"...That could be troublesome," the white unicorn said worriedly.

Leon watched as more aliens began to show up, both in his territory and in Ed's. The next several turns were tenuous. The aliens pillaged the tile of fruit; in a moment of rage he blasted the alien responsible.

The turn after that was somewhat better; his Supersonic Fence finished, and the aliens were forced to leave. The Gold mine finished, he sent his Worker to repair the Fruit.

"Bother," Luna muttered, "they destroyed my algae improvement. Leon, Edward, next time, can you wait until we are all ready before you start blasting the aliens?"

"Sorry Princess. Won't happen again," Eddy said quickly.

"...Yes," Leon said after a second longer.

"You too, Rainbow Dash."

"Hey!"

"I know you too well. You love being competitive, and you enjoy combat in these kinds of games, do you not?"

"...Maybe..."

Three turns later, the alien icons turned green once more. Leon heard several sighs of relief, one of them coming from his own mouth.

"Let that be a warning to you guys," Twilight said.

Leon chose not to say anything in response to that. Deep down, he knew she was right. Instead, he kept an eye on what he was doing at present. The Ranger finished, which was good, seeing as he didn't want to lag any more behind the Slavic Federation - behind Ed - than he had to, if at all.

He heard a faint voice coming from his headset. "Oh, is it that time already?" he heard Luna say. "What... past!? Oh my!"

"What's going on?" Rainbow asked.

"I am terribly sorry, my friends, but I am five minutes late already to raise the moon!"

"Whoa, really?"

"I was wondering why the moon wasn't up yet," Twilight mused. "I kept checking my clock and I was wondering if it was wrong."

"One reason I must leave, and quickly put this to rights."

"Are you coming back?"

"With genuine regret in her voice, Luna said, "No. I must attend court tonight, and my schedule is really busy. However, I'll save the game; that way, we'll be able to come back some other time."

"'Night, Princess!' Eddy said, trying to sound cheerful.

"Good night, my friends. To another night of friendship and pleasure!"

Leon got of the game, stood up, and stretched.

To another night, hanging out with my friends.

Author's Note

I know that there has been some controversy over this game; as many people seem to hate it as like it. I am one of the latter. It brings new stuff to an older game engine, and if it's not perfect... well, nothing made by mere human beings is.

Axis and Allies (1998 version), game 1 (part 1); Russia besieged

Axis and Allies (1998 version), game 1 (part 1); Russia besieged

Leon leaned back in his chair as he waited for the others to join. They weren't long in coming.

"Glad I was able to make it," Rainbow said as she connected. "I thought I'd never get done cloud busting today."

"At least you didn't have to respond to yet another series of false Changeling reports," Shining said, sounding annoyed. "All of them, false. No Changelings or any evidence of them."

"Practical joke?" Leon asked.

"If it is and I find them, I'm throwing them in prison and charging them with deliberate misuse of public services. Actually, since the Royal Guard is essentially the military, that would be too lenient."

"And if it's just panicked ponies?" Rainbow inquired.

"In that case... I don't know. Ever since the attack on Canterlot, sightings of Changelings have been coming in. More often than not, no truth to any of them; most of the time, it's just a pony whose silhouette was mistaken, or a cat or dog out at dusk."

"I am sorry to hear of your troubles," Luna commented. "I intend to enforce the laws that are already in place regarding claims that mislead the military, as well as of public services. Unfortunately, I have uncovered that a pranking spree has been going around all around Equestria, and it has to stop. Last week, there were three calls to the Manehattan fire department, each one claiming that there was a fire when there wasn't. And, for another... well, a poor colt in Ponyville had the police come to his home, having received a call claiming he was holding somepony hostage. Sadly, we did not catch the culprit of that last incident - of any of those incidents, actually - and no doubt these urchins have been laughing behind their hooves while the authorities run around trying to catch them."

"Sounds like a bad day," Eddy said.

"Try a week. I'm sick of having to deal with this particular kind of lawbreaker. The last incident is especially infuriating... what do you humans call it?"

"Swatting," Leon supplied. "SWAT teams being basically heavily armed police, intended to deal with hostage situations and crooks armed with automatic weapons." Sighing, he went on, "It's only a matter of time before someone is shot by mistake, the way things are going."

"Exactly. The Royal Guard is still on alert for trouble. Hopefully, this mess can be solved soon."

"Are all Changelings bad?"

"Oh, no. Not all. In fact... no, I can't risk talking about... oh, heck with it. This is private. We have Changeling agents working for us."

"That's new."

"And controversial," Shining added.

"And controversial," Luna echoed. "Captain Armor isn't popular with the idea. However, as a loyal soldier of the Crown, he'll put up with it."

"The things I put up with for Equestria," Shining mumbled. Leon thought he could hear a note of amusement. "So, what's the set-up for this game?"

"Second World War, somewhere in spring, 1942," Leon said. "Axis vs. the Allies, Germany and Japan against the USSR, Britain, and the USA. Each nation takes its turn. You'll see what it's like."

"Okay. Am I correct in assuming each of us gets a country?"

"Yes."

"Good luck getting any one to play Germany," Rainbow said. "I read about what that maniac Hitler did, and..."

"Yeah... it was terrible, to say the least," Leon agreed. "More so than any of us can appreciate. However, the game almost never plays out exactly like it did historically. And since history, and the country, are under your control, you could make it so that Hitler was assassinated by one of his generals, the way he was in the novel, For the Fatherland. I think a lot of people have moral qualms about playing Germany in this kind of game."

"Well, if you put it that way, I guess I could put up with it. I assume Leon is playing America and Eddy is being Britain."

"How did you...?"

"I'm not entirely ignorant of where you guys live, you know," the cyan pegasus said. "Figures you'd both play as your own countries, same as I'd play Equestria, if this game were set in our own world."

"That leaves us with Japan, Germany, and the USSR," Shining said. "What does USSR stand for?"

"Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, which is the official name of the state translated into English. It's real abbreviation is SSSR, but I can't pronounce the name it stands for."

"I see. Assuming Rainbow sticks with Germany, who is playing as the other two nations?"

"I might be willing to play as Japan," Luna answered. "I'm not the biggest fan of either the Soviet Union or Communism, in spite of the fandom's opinions to the contrary."

"You sure?" Leon inquired. "They worship the sun there, not the moon."

"I and my sister are not deities, as I've told you before; nor are Discord or Tirek. And neither of them are demons, as is the alternate belief."

"Then why has Equestria worshipped the both of you in the past?"

"Our long lives and magical powers might have lead to the misconception. As my sister ruled Equestria for over a thousand years, many such misconceptions have formed. I must admit, its flattering," Luna added, sounding blushful. "But it gets annoying when I keep getting letters asking why I haven't answered their prayers, despite having answered endless times in other letters that I cannot hear them. Anyway, its the only country left free to have a monarchy; the alternative is to chose a nation that both murdered their royal family and killed more of their own people than fell in World War I."

"Ok, than means I'm playing the Soviets then," Shining said. "Can I do the same thing with them as Leon suggested for Rainbow regarding Germany?"

"Yep," Leon said.

"Good."

"Ok, so we're all ready to play?" Luna asked. After receiving an affirmative answer from the others, she went on, "In that case, I'm starting the game. I'd advise everypony and everyone to switch to a team-based chat. Here we go."

Leon made sure to adjust the chat channel he was on. In the meantime, a large sign with a Russian soldier - standing next to an equally large USSR spelling - appeared for a couple seconds as the Soviet theme began to play, before the sign disappeared and was replaced by a poster asking the current player whether or not they were going to spend IPCs on Weapons Development.

"Russians have the best music in the game," Leon remarked.

"What should I do?" Shining asked.

"Skip it," Eddy said. "You almost never roll a six and even when you get one, you don't get the tech you really want for yourself."

"Okay. Now it's asking me what units to buy."

"Go full infantry," Leon said. "Russia, early on, is the tank in this game."

"By tank, do you mean like a pulverizing steamroller, or as in I take a ton of damage?"

"The... second one might be... slightly more accurate?" Leon said shyly.

"That sucks."

"Yeah. There used to be a rule in the older editions of the game, called USSR Restricted; it kept Russia from attacking at all on it's first turn."

"I'm assuming that isn't the case here?"

"It isn't."

Shining purchased the units, then the game went on to the combat move phase. "Okay, what should I do? Looks like I have a lot of options here."

"Best idea is to attack Finland-Norway," Eddy suggested. "It'll give me direct access to you via transport, and I won't even have to move them to another sea space. Of course, you could attack Eastern Europe or the Ukraine, but both are easy to lose when the Germans come knocking, and they take their turn right after you do."

"Right. How much force should I use?"

"Take a couple tanks, your fighters, and three infantry from Karelia."

Shining did so. "What about attacking Manchuria?"

"Not a good idea. Infantry are weak on offense, and you'll likely lose Manchuria when the Japanese start kicking."

"I see. What about my submarine?"

"Wait until the non-combat phase to move it, and the transport in the Baltic. The Soviet navy plays next to no role in this game, except to help keep German ships and planes off England proper."

"Right. So that's my only combat for this turn?"

"Basically. Don't worry, the game heats up fast."

The game moved on to the combat phase. Shining clicked on Finland-Norway. The screen switched to one displaying the forces of the two sides, each on an opposite end of the board. Numbers up to four were displayed, with the units each aligned under one. The three Russian infantry were on the one tab, their tanks and fighters on the three. The Germans were lined up accordingly with differences being made for their defensive role. Tanks were better at attacking than defending, and infantry and fighters were stronger on defense than on offense. For example, infantry only inflicted damage on offense when the attacker rolled a one on a die; they did damage on a two or less on defense.

The first roll for the Soviets was less than optimal; only a couple hits, both from tanks and fighters. However, the Axis didn't have much in the first place, and they only scored one hit in return, which Shining put on one of his infantry. The casualties of both sides exploded, ending the round. The second round saw the annihilation of the German forces entirely.

The scene flipped back to the world map. The Finland-Norway territory had turned reddish-brown, the color of the Soviet Union.

"That was only the first round," Rainbow typed in the chat. "I'll get you next time!"

"I'm assuming that it's now the non combat phase?" Shining asked.

"Yes," Eddy answered. "Oh, you can't keep planes on a territory you just captured; those will have to go back somewhere; best place is probably Karelia."

"Right." Shining moved his planes, and put most of the units on the Russia territory - his capital - in Karelia. He also moved two of the infantry to the east into one where three of his other infantry units had been positioned, northwest of Manchuria. "Anything else?"

"Not much; Just move your sub and transport to the tile surrounding my homeland. Just skip to the place units phases... oh, and leave at least one or two units in your capital, or the Germans may be able to capture it with a parachute drop, and then you'd be in a world of hurt."

The white unicorn placed his units on the board - six infantry in Karelia, two in Russia - then received 26 IPCs as income.

"Germany's turn," Leon noted. "I wonder what Rainbow Dash will do?"

"Okay, my turn," Rainbow said to herself. She bought three tanks and some infantry before skipping to the combat move phase.

"I'd highly advise destroying the British fleet," Luna suggested. "That will keep them from invading you, and give you time to smash the USSR. As for the Soviets, move most of your armor and available infantry to take Karelia."

"I might be able to take it, but they'll take it back unless I get really good rolls of the dice."

"But you're crippling them, and you have more IPCs to start out with. Move your naval units to take out the British fleet in the Mediterranean, and invade Egypt."

"Not much to invade with; we're even in Africa. But still..." Rainbow moved her units according to how Luna had suggested. "Might cost me a lot of the air force.. what was it the Germans called theirs? The luftwaffle?"

"Luftwaffe; it literally means 'air weapons.'"

"Yeah. They say things weird."

"They'd say the same thing about us and Equestrian, or English, as humans call it."

"No way! But anyway, which battle should I click on first?"

"The one just off the British Isles."

Rainbow did so. The battle was mostly against a number of transports, as well as a Soviet submarine. The first German rolls knocked out a couple British transports. The British, in turn, scored a hit as well, which she reluctantly put on a submarine of her own. The second round wiped out most of the units; however, the enemy submarine submerged, which took it out of the fight while preserving it for later use. The blue pony smiled. It always - or at least usually - felt good to win, and this was no exception. The remaining naval battles went her way, although she suffered a hit on her battleship.

In Anglo Egypt-Sudan, however, the British were able to take out her infantry, and since she hadn't taken out either their tank or infantry in turn, she had to retreat. She growled when she saw Eddy type, "Better luck next time," in chat.

Finally, she clicked on the Karelia. Although she was outnumbered, her tanks gave her better firepower than the Russians. Several Soviet units were taken out of the battle in the first couple rounds, but the Russians got a couple hits of their own in each one, wiping out four German Infantry units. The third round saw another two German casualties, with most of the remaining Soviet resistance destroyed. The fourth round finally wiped out the enemy entirely, although another German infantry became a casualty.

Karelia switched to a German gray. Rainbow sighed. She hadn't had many infantry left after that battle. If it had lasted longer, or if Shining had gotten luckier with his die rolls, her tanks would have been taking the hits.

She moved more of her ground units toward the USSR, and she moved her planes back into German territory before collecting a decent income. She smiled again. The turn hadn't been everything she'd wanted it to be, but it turned out pretty good, all things considered.

"Right, navy taken out, and severe damage done to Russia," Eddy murmured on his turn. "'Least we don't have to worry about a Nazi Africa."

"Good thing, too; I'm so frustrated with the rolls I got just now," Shining said irritably.

"Well now, let's see..." Eddy brought three more transports, a tank, and an infantry. "That'll do for starters. Now, on to the insanity."

Eddy immediately attacked Libya with the tank and infantry in Anglo Egypt-Sudan. He followed up by using his bomber to attack Germany itself in order to bomb its IPCs. He sent his fighter in India to attack a Japanese transport in its range.

"Hopefully this will suffice."

"Hopefully," Leon echoed.

"Hey, cheer up; its me."

The Englishman switched to the combat phase itself. The bombing run against Germany paid off; he rolled a six, meaning Germany had just lost six IPCs, enough to by a single tank or two infantry, while Rainbow's anti-aircraft fire from the anti-aircraft gun on that territory.

"Nice one!" Shining said approvingly.

"Ought to help you a little, I think."

The battle for Libya was not so quickly successful. "Oh come on," Ed shouted in frustration after three turns had passed without anybody hitting anything. "How about one of you dipsticks hit something?"

"Could use some of 'The Few' right now, couldn't you?" Leon joked.

"Yeah I could. Finally," he said, as his tank finally scored on the lone German tank facing him. The enemy failed to hit him in return, and Libya's gray color switched to British tan. "Miserable little gits."

"They got the job done in the end."

"Yeah. Still, that could have been better."

Eddy switched to the battle between the fighter and the transport. Eddy managed to hit it on the first round, although the enemy unit rolled a two, which was close enough to a one to make him feel uneasy. It was always embarrassing when a transport was able to kill a fighter, or any powerful unit, especially if the transport didn't die in the process.

"That ought to delay them a bit," he said.

In the non combat phase, he fumed at the fact that he wasn't able to send a large number of reinforcements to Russia. He was able to ferry a tank from Eastern Canada to Finland-Norway; Rainbow hadn't sent any units to kill the transport in the sea zone next to the eastern side of the Dominion. The fighters weren't going to be of the greatest use in England, not unless the Germans were to invade, and they didn't have any transports nearby, and even though they had a bomber, it could only transport a single Infantry unit at a time, and Rainbow wasn't foolhardy enough to send a single unit to attack Britain. Moreover, they would take as many moves to attack Western Europe from the Scandinavian land as from Britain itself. He moved them accordingly.

He didn't have much navy left to move. A transport was sitting in the sea zone next to India. He moved it to a zone next to Australia. It could still be attacked, but it was better than just leaving near India to die anyway, and it would give him additional options in regards to the two infantry on the island continent.

He placed his units on and around Britain; he had no industrial sites anywhere else. That was the trouble with Britain in this edition of the game; it was too stretched out, and the only place reinforcements could be placed, at least initially, was the British Isles. Other industrial sides could be set up - India was usually the ideal place - but it cost eighteen IPCs that could be used to purchase units, crippling British production on the turn it was built. India was also at very heavy risk of being captured by the Japanese, hence one reason some people playing the United Kingdom didn't bother building one... and no other territory initially controlled by Britain was suitable.

He collected his income, and hoped Leon was ready for the blow coming his way.

"Hmm, a low amount of production compared to everyone else, save the Soviets, and a large military," Luna thought out loud. "I think it's obvious what the game designers had in mind."

"Attack everypony in sight," Rainbow stated.

"Basically. However, there's so much to do." With her starting money, Luna purchased a transport, a tank, and three infantry, leaving one IPC for the next round. With that, she began looking earnest at her options.

The main problems were the British in India - the fighter there had just killed one of her transports - as well as the American fleet off Hawaii. American units were also positioned in China - to represent the Chinese who were still battling the Japanese - and the Soviets had five infantry, on two separate spaces, that could be brought to attack Manchuria, with two more coming to reinforce them. Although she had a large military, she had the problem of being made vulnerable from one direction if she attacked in another. Of course, the Soviets were already in big trouble, and they'd have to put most of their units on the line in the west to correct the situation. And the British could hardly mount an attack of their own. Even assuming their attack was successful, they'd almost certainly lose the units when she counterattacked, and then they'd lose India anyway.

The British, then, could wait. The territories of China and Sinkiang, however, could be munched up within the next two turns easily enough. And the Soviet Far East was looking rather ripe for the plucking.

Sorry, Shining, she thought as she moved numerous units - including her sole bomber - to attack the territory next the Soviet Far East one. I'll Invite you to dinner tonight after I raise the moon, I promise. For China, she used her fighters and moved in her infantry. Finally, she moved two battleships, a carrier and fighter, and a submarine to assault the waters off Hawaii.

When she was satisfied, she clicked on the battle for Hawaii first. Leon's force consisted of a single submarine, a carrier, and a fighter. Her own force scored two hits. However, rather disconcertingly, every last shot of the American force struck its target. She took the hit on her submarine and then had the bad choice of having to put a hit on each of her battleships or else face losing her fighter or carrier. She decided to put the hits on her battleships, which took two hits to sink in the game. Leon ticked off his carrier and submarine. When Luna attacked again, she hit the fighter, which this time failed to score a return hit.

Satisfied with the results, she clicked on China. The two American infantry and fighter were outnumbered badly. They were wiped out in the first round, though they got two hits of their own, which she placed on her infantry.

Finally, and somewhat reluctantly, seeing how the poor Royal Guard Captain was already in deep trouble, she clicked on the Russian territory she was attacking. The Russians didn't stand much of a chance. They got picked off, and, with what seemed to be the usual Soviet bad luck in the game, got only one hit in return, on a Japanese Infantry.

With the combat decided, she began moving her forces as needed. She took the tank on Japan and placed it in Manchuria. She also took a couple infantry - one each from Okinawa and the Philippines - and moved them onto Papua New Guinea in preparation for an assault on Australia next turn.

With that, she placed her units on or around Japan and collected her income, which was pleasingly higher than what she'd started out with.

Not a bad start for me. If we can keep this up, Rainbow and I could very well win.

Okay, well, kinda expected that to happen, Leon thought, thinking of the battle off Hawaii. Now show what America can do.

He skipped weapons development - despite having the highest income of any player currently in the game - and went on to purchase a couple submarines, a transport, and two tanks.

He sent his entire air force, as well as the battleship and transport off the coast of the Western USA, to crush the Japanese fleet off the shores of Hawaii. He also loaded up a tank in a transport of the shores of the Eastern USA and sent it off to the shores of Algeria, where he off-loaded it.

"Prepare to die," he typed before clicking on Hawaii.

The first round saw his fighters score a hit, and the battleship and bomber scored a hit each. The Japanese returned fire, scoring two hits. One of these he put on the transport, which was unable to fire offensively anyway, the other on his battleship. Luna took the hits on her fighter and carrier. The second round saw the elimination of the Japanese force, which knocked down one of Leon's fighters in return.

"Never waken a sleeping giant," he couldn't help but type in chat.

"The wrath of the Rising Sun awaits you," Luna typed back.

The battle in Algeria went well. After two rounds of misses, his tank scored on the German infantry, which did not hit him back.

"Operation Torch has proceeded on schedule," he typed.

"Can't say that I liked the idea of Jerry in Africa," Ed replied. "Don't have to worry much about them being there for now."

Leon, now in the non-combat phase, looked long and hard at China. Sinkiang was going to fall, of that there was little doubt. However... he shifted one of his two men there to India. That would ensure the Japanese were slowed in Sinkiang, and India would be better fortified, and perhaps withstand an assault. He shifted his planes back to the Western USA. He placed his units - all of them - in the East, moving the infantry in the west eastward; the faster Germany went down, the better. The Japanese mostly relied on their planes and infantry, and infantry were weak compared to any other unit in the game, save transports, while planes had to move back to a previously occupied space once a territory was captured, leaving the new conquest open for a counterattack. However, Germany's best units were its tanks; until the armor factory known as Germany was put out of commission, the USSR would be under siege.

This is why the game is called Axis and Allies, he thought. The Allies have to work together in order to win. The Axis need to rush early on, or they get swamped by the Allies' superior industrial capacity. he noted, in his mind, that Germany and Japan had hardly cooperated at all; the Pearl Harbor attack had induced Hitler, against his will, to declare war on the United States. Japan would probably have attacked the US even without a Nazi-driven Germany to distract the western powers.

Leon collected his income, after which the screen switched to view a newspaper and a graph that allowed the players to see how they had done. The USSR - unsurprisingly - had gone down a considerable peg. Britain had risen slightly, and the US had fallen a little. Germany and Japan, on the other hand, had both gone up, Japan more than Germany, which had lost three territories to the Allies and any chance of taking over Africa any time soon. Japan was the only country to have not lost any land at all.

"That was a fun round," Luna said via chat. "But sadly, the next one will have to wait. I've got to raise the moon and see to court tonight."

"That's okay, Princess," Shining said, switching to their original channel to speak directly to her. "Duty comes first."

"I'm glad you understand that. Thanks for the game, Leon and Edward; it was great!"

"You're welcome."

"See you around, Princess. Enjoy the night!"

"I will. And it's all thanks to you, my friends. Good night, all of you."

Author's Note

Note; I don't know if there's any way to really download this game and make it available for online multiplayer, so this chapter is kind of speculative. But I just had to do this sometime; it used to be one of my favorite games.

Unfortunately, I've also forgotten some of the precise locations of units at the start. If you notice any errors, please forgive me for that.

Shogun 2; Total War, Game 1; What the heck is a Donderbuss!?

"Glad you were all able to make it tonight," Edward said as they all came into the session.

"Honestly, I was afraid I might not be able to come," Luna replied. "Court has been busy this week, and there have been a multitude of cases coming up, almost as if from nowhere."

"What kind of cases?" Twilight asked.

"Many of them were the regular, including nobles wanting 'old rights' which they had never had in the first place and business ponies wanting some sort of leeway to do something morally questionable. Admittedly some were valid, like one where a family was facing homelessness because they had fallen into debt. As it turns out, they had been goaded - bullied is perhaps a more accurate term - into taking loans, which those offering them knew they couldn't afford to repay. Needless to say, the whole thing didn't turn out pleasant for the loan sharks, most of whom are now in prison for conspiracy against the citizenry and the rest being slapped with community service and required to give out much of their money to charity groups and to the state. It's cases like this last one where I can sometimes tell myself that the job is worth doing."

"Wow. Hopefully not every case you face is as infuriating as that."

"Most aren't. Its quite common actually for a misinterpretation or a mistake to have been made concerning the law, which I am always happy to correct. However, other cases have turned up which are not so easily resolved. Bullying, especially that occurring in school rather than in a work or home environment, is one such problem. It just feels like such a tangle because the victim can be accused - sometimes with merit - of being the real culprit, and the parents of a bully usually do not know what their child gets up to when they are not in the house. And, naturally, there is cyber-bullying, which is even harder to determine than normal bullying because of internet anonymity."

"Do you ever wish..?" Leon began.

"No. I do not regret bringing human technology into our world. I do sometimes detest the uses to which it is put, but that is the fault of the user, not the technology itself. And, recently, the tide of battle seems to be turning," the blue alicorn said, sounding more confident.

"Let me guess; you took a page out of Curt Schilling's book, didn't you?"

"Indeed I did. We, meaning I and my royal officials, sought out the information we needed. Unfortunately, some of them are human and were therefore out of our immediate grasp, but most were ponies, who are within the borders of the country and who were able to bring to justice. Several lost college and high school memberships, a number lost jobs, and we sent a couple to special schools that deal with this kind of problem in individuals."

"Wow," Eddy said in a voice different than that of Leon's a few moments ago. "Nice coup, that."

"I suppose, though I doubt it will stop the problem entirely," Luna said ruefully. "Hopefully it will teach youths to think before they act, and thus suppress the issue most of the time. But enough of my troubles. How did the day go for each of you?"

"Oh, my day was great!" Twilight said excitedly. "I studied the legends of King Arthur this morning, then I went to the spa with Rarity and had dinner with the rest of the gang."

"Normal sixth-form college day," Ed answered. "Rather normal, except for an accident in carpentry, where one poor sod was taken out of school to the hospital. Hope the poor bloke gets through okay. They said he cut his arm by mistake, but that it wasn't going to be permanent, and if they tell the truth, he'll be fine, but I can help being a little anxious about class down there tomorrow."

"Usual day in high school," Leon said after a moment. "No accidents, but math was... math."

"Which is to say it went badly."

"Well... yes..."

Leon made sure to check the units in his army. During all the talking, he had made a force of a squadron of Donderbuss Cavalry, along with four Yari Cavalry. A bow hero, two bow monks, and a couple Bow Samurai formed most of his ranged attack force, with a squad of Hand Mortars providing artillery support. The rest of his army was made up of Katana Samurai and a couple No-Dachi Samurai, with a tetsubo hero set in with them. All his units were veterans with some upgrades. His avatar, who he had named Firestar, was clothed in armor and garments of dark blue, as were all of Leon's units. The symbol on the flag on the back of his men was also dark blue, with a cross in the middle of a circle at the top.

"Unfortunately, the school in Ponyville has been underequipped lately," Twilight said regretfully. "They've had to retire a lot of the old material, since it was obsolete, and they don't have the money to buy newer, up to date textbooks."

"I shall see to that as soon as I can," Luna promised. "Education is a priority, especially considering the enemies and situations Equestria has faced in the past few years."

"Anyway, I think the teams are going to be me and Edward against you and Leon?" Twilight asked.

"Yes, the old guard against the new."

"You sure of that? Me and Twilight have Franco-Prussian war tech against your swords, spears, and bows," Eddy queried.

"Just because you have modern weapons does not mean you will win," Luna warned. "The old guard has more than a few useful tricks up its sleeve."

"Yeah, well, good luck," Eddy said in an amused voice, before he and Twilight switched to a different channel.

"Well, he's confident," the Lunar Princess remarked.

"No matter. They'll soon learn the strength and courage of the samurai."

"Indeed." Then, in a more serious tone, she asked, "Do you have access to any DLC?"

"Yes. The Otomo pack as well as the Saints and Heroes pack, as well as one or two others."

"I see. Sounds like Japan had a lot of religious tensions in the... what was the name of the era again?"

"The Sengoku Jidai, or Age of the Country at War. And yes, thought to be one hundred percent honest, I didn't know about the Ikko Ikki until this game came out."

"Neither did I. So it was largely an issue between Christians and Buddhists?"

"It was, though there wasn't a major conflict between the two faiths until the Shimabara Rebellion took hold some forty years into the Tokugawa Shogunate. Christians, sadly, were persecuted much of the time, due to the suspicions of the Japanese leaders."

"But why? Christian missionaries, along with those of other faiths, have moved to Equestria, and while they haven't had a big following, they have caused little, if any, trouble at all. I found some of them very uplifting and pleasant to talk to."

"Because the Japanese believed that the Christian Japanese would support an invasion by the Spanish or Portuguese; you know, supporting their co-religionists. After the Shimabara Rebellion was crushed, the Tokugawa Shogunate went gung-ho in wiping them out, though a few survived and carried on the faith in hiding. The invasion never happened, but it didn't stop the persecution."

"So they.. did what they did because they thought, and only thought, that Christians were traitors?"

"Yes. And, unfortunately, not all the westerners were nice and polite; some were pretty nasty, which reinforced Japanese suspicions. In the campaign, you get options regarding western intervention, usually in Fall of the Samurai. If you favor your own people over the foreigners, you usually get the shaft, and your economy suffers for it."

"I see. It does not excuse the persecution, though."

"No, it doesn't. After the Sengoku Jidai was over, the Japanese slowly gave up on guns; by the time Admiral Perry came in 1854, they were making swords and spears, while the guns were mostly in storage. About the only time in history when the clock has been turned back."

"Why?"

"Tradition, and because the idea that a mere peasant could kill a samurai more easily than a samurai could kill the peasant was shocking to them. War didn't have the same feeling for them with guns. By and large, guns weren't really needed in the isolationist Japan that emerged, with the exception of a few revolts."

"Hmmm. Let me see your army." After a few seconds, she said, "It looks decently balanced, but there's no real specialization."

"Yeah, well, if you try to specialize, you end up getting stabbed in the side from some other quarter. Better to be able to respond to any threat that comes my way."

"Jack of all trades and master of none. I suppose I cannot argue overly much with that. But trying to keep all angles covered isn't always the best way to deal with something."

"No spoony bard could spin a finer tale."

"Ha ha! That was actually funny."

"Look, if I focus on..."

Just then, Eddy and Twilight came back to their channel. "Princess, can we have a team change?" Twilight asked.

"Why, what happened?"

"Well..."

"Short, sweet, and to the point, we had some arguments about our two countries' monarchies and how useful they are in their current stations" Eddy said, sounding as though he were still mildly frustrated. "And no, I am not going to tell anyone what we said, I just think I need a different teammate right now."

"I... see. Sort of," Luna mumbled. "I'll be your teammate, in that case. Leon, you can be teamed up with Twilight."

"Um, okay."

"I know you were looking forward to playing with me on your side," Luna said in sympathy. "But it might be the best idea for now."

"Right." Leon hadn't had much experience playing with Twilight as an ally, and felt more comfortable playing with someone he knew better. "Shikata ga nai," he muttered in response. The Japanese phrase was particularly fatalistic; it literally meant Nothing can be done about it or It can't be helped. It wasn't that he disliked the purple unicorn; on the contrary, he did like her, and often had positive things to say to her older brother. However, he knew how Luna would operate, and knowing what an ally could and would do had been instrumental in winning battles before; he had no idea what Twilight would do. She also liked to ask questions, and Leon usually wasn't in the mood to answer them.

"Don't worry," Twilight said confidently. "We'll have decent mix of old and modern units. I suspect we'll do fine."

Leon switched chat to one with Twilight as the only other recipient. "Hopefully. Going up against guns isn't always what its cranked up to be."

Before the unicorn could respond, the timer began to tick down, and the screen switched to one depicting Samurai fighting - and dying - in the background. In the foreground was a map of the battlefield the two sides would fight on, along with their respective starting positions. "Okay," Leon said, "what's the real reason Eddy wanted to switch teammates?"

"Oh, that... well..." Twilight sounded reluctant to respond. "I guess it was pretty stupid. We were talking about the Princesses, and then I said that I wished the British King and Queen had achieved what Princess Celestia had."

"You said... that.?"

"...Yes. It was a really stupid mistake, and as soon as it was out, I tried to apologize, but he started cutting through me, shouting about how important the King and Queen were; I think he was upset because he thought I implied that they weren't as important or as useful as the Princesses were, and that I was talking about how they'd basically been figureheads for quite a long time now."

"Yeah. Sounds just like him. He may not be the typical, tea-drinking Briton people stereotypically expect, but he loves England, and implying those kinds of things, even by accident, would be enough to set him off."

"Sadly, yes. And, though I'm not happy to admit it, when he said something rather... uncomplimentary about our own government system, I got angry too, and lashed back."

"Good thing you guys decided to split up. If this were real, your armies would probably kill one another off and leave me and Luna with just a clean up job."

"Yeah. Anyway, looks like the battle's about to start."

Leon looked up and saw that the screen had flipped to black; seconds later, it flipped to a position just above his army. "Oh, right." He began setting up his army; he put his cavalry on the flanks of his force, with his melee units behind the ranged ones; he set the ranged units in loose formation, which would make it harder for enemy missiles to hit them. He set his hand mortars with his other ranged units.

He looked at Twilight's deployment. Her army had one unit each of United States Marines, Royal Marines, and Infanterie de Marine, as well as four units of Tosa Riflemen, several Imperial Guards, a unit of Kyoto Police, and a battery of Armstrong artillery, in addition to four units of Yari Ki, which were spear cavalry in Fall of the Samurai.

Over all, their armies weren't bad, but Leon knew he had a bit of a bad habit of relying too much on elite DLC units, like the Tesubos and Seigen Swordmasters, which were expensive to put in an army and had considerably fewer soldiers in a unit than generic Katana Samurai. Not that these units were bad; in fact, they were awesome. But to throw them at an army without some ordinary Japanese Joes to back them up, they best they could do was usually slaughter a lot of enemies before getting wiped out. Luckily, he was trying to break that habit, but it still kept coming up every now and again.

Leon hit the button that signified that he was ready and waited for the battle to begin in earnest.

As soon as the timer wound down and the fight started, Leon got a good look at the other side. Luna had a main force of Katana Samurai with three archer units and six cavalry (four Yari and two Katana), as well as a Long Yari Ashigaru and a couple normal Yari Ashigaru. The cavalry was what held Leon's attention. He wondered why ponies liked to use cavalry units; although Applejack, Rainbow, and other ponies had allowed humans on their backs in a previous rodeo, he doubted they liked the idea of a horse being forced to do what a rider wanted them to, especially if it were war-oriented.

Eddy had a large force of regular Imperial Infantry and some Carbine and Yari Ki to bolster them, along with a battery of Armstrong guns, as well as a few Sharpshooters. A potent force, if used properly. The trick with an old army was getting close enough to use melee weapons, which wasn't generally easy. Leon pondered what to do.

"Hmm, not a bad army," Twilight noted. "I've got the Princess to deal with. Hopefully I can beat her quickly. Hold on until then."

"Just make sure to watch for cav. They'll butcher us if we let them."

"Oh don't worry; I have a talent for micro-management."

"Well, you're not the one under artillery fire," Leon said as shells began to land around - and, unfortunately, in - one of his frontline Katana Samurai units. Blue-clad armored men started flying.

"We'll have to send our cavalry to deal with them, but only after we've beaten theirs."

If we can beat theirs, Leon thought. Rifle-armed cavalry were goners if they were hit from the side, but try approaching from the front and they'd make you pay.

Already, Eddy and Luna were advancing, though Ed was only moving his cavalry; everything else was staying put. Luna no doubt knew that her army wasn't going to do well if it stayed under fire, and likely she was trying to force the issue. Most of her army was moving to attack Twilight, but she was sending her Ashigaru toward Leon.

Leon responded by sending all of his Yari Cavalry to flank Ed, while sending his Donderbuss unit to set itself next on the left side of the unicorn's army to help guard it. And, little as he liked it, he knew that his army was going to be hammered; if he moved it back, that would increase the time it would need to come back forward, and it would leave Twilight largely on her own for a few minutes, and that would be all the time the other side would need to inflict decisive damage.

Reluctantly, he decided to advance as well. Twilight was already moving forward, and Ed could flank her if he sat still. Yeah, better I don't let that happen.

All the while, Eddy's guns were landing rounds in and around his army. Luckily, Armstrong Guns tended to run out of ammo quickly due to how fast they fired, but they could do damage more quickly than Parrot Guns, which had the same amount of ammunition but fired more slowly. So far, only twelve rounds had landed; each of the Englishman's cannons still had seventeen shots left to fire.

Yeah, I'm not letting you just sit there and kill me at will. Sorry, ain't happening.

He continued to move forward, all the while trying to keep an eye on the enemy cavalry. Ed had sent his Carbine Cavalry to attack Twilight's cavalry, but his Yari Ki were all to eager for a fight with Leon. Two of them raced out to face Leon's Yari Cavalry, with a third unit bringing up the rear.

Leon could see a delaying tactic when he saw it. Three units of cavalry weren't going to stop four, but they could delay them and inflict casualties. Large numbers of warriors from both sides toppled from the saddle, and horses screamed and fell with their riders.

Leon had sent three cavalry, one for each enemy unit, to match the enemy, while a third crept up from the side and hit one of the enemy cavalry. Men and horses continued to fall, but more of them were the red-clad warriors Eddy favored.

Finally, after about a minute of battle, the flags on the enemy units began flashing white, indicating that they were about to rout. They did so a few seconds later. Only a handful of the enemy cavalrymen had survived, but they had delayed Leon's units and inflicted moderate casualties; out of about 45 men that had started out in each unit, he was down to 22, 18, 23, and 39. The losses weren't bad...

Until, of course, Eddy turned his guns on the bunched up survivors. Several shells reduced their number before Leon could scatter them; one routed. Leon let his fist fall on his desk. His cavalry was badly weakened, both from the fight and the volley, and now it wouldn't have the strength to do damage that it would have been able to do otherwise.

By this time, Leon's Hand Mortars were close enough to enemy lines to fire on the enemy line. He targeted a unit of Imperial Infantry; the mortars would be unlikely to kill many of the enemy gun crews.

Eat this!

The small shells landed around and in the enemy unit. While not as spectacular as cannon shells, the mortar shells were more in number, and soldiers in orange - the color Eddy used for his infantry - were thrown for yards around.

Leon's plan was for his archers engage the enemy riflemen while his other infantry came from either side of the enemy, outflanking them and forcing them to divide their attention. His cavalry would sneak in from behind and hit them where they were weakest. It was a good plan... or it would be, if it worked.

Twilight wasn't sure whether Leon's attack would work, but it would keep the heat off her.

Princess Luna was continuing her advance. Her archer units were in front, and her cavalry were moving off to either side; the ones to Twilight's left were aided by Edward's own cavalry units, which were armed with guns.

She moved her Kyoto police to her army's right flank, to help guard against cavalry attack there. It was all she could do other than keep some of the riflemen on that side facing the enemy cavalry. She sent her own cavalry to intercept the cavalry coming up on her left.

She wished she had gotten cavalry with guns. Her cavalry took numerous losses before they actually struck. Of course, once they got into melee range, they inflicted heavy casualties, but the damage done to them showed. And it wasn't as if the enemy weren't doing damage of their own.

Luckily, she had copied Leon's trick, and sent a unit in from the side. It caught a unit of Carbine Cavalry by surprise, and knocked large numbers of them out in seconds. However, the units that had already engaged had taken a great deal of damage from rifle fire, and Luna's own Yari Cavalry, being armed with spears, did enough damage to counter that she had inflicted. After about thirty seconds, her cavalry began to rout one after the other. Twilight would have been more upset if she had expected more. She disengaged the unit that had launched the flank attack and managed to withdraw it.

She had at least heavily damaged the enemy cavalry contingent; apparently, Eddy and Luna had been hoping that a successful cavalry strike would cripple her army, leaving them to take down Leon. She couldn't help a confident smile. That wasn't going to happen now. And for such an attack to work, it would be better to use an entire army of cavalry rather than mixing unit types.

Luna still had undamaged cavalry units, though, and she used them to strike Twilight's right side. Two units of Imperial Guards and a unit of Tosa Riflemen had been hit. She sent her Kyoto Police forward, along with her last cavalry unit, as well as sending a unit to open fire from the side. It was likely that she might hit some of her own troops, but she needed to stop those cavalry from wrecking her army.

The Kyoto Police - an elite spear unit - immediately went to work. After a few moments, her last Yari Ki arrived as well, hitting one of the attacking units from the side. It took another minute for the enemy to be driven off, and by then she'd lost the Riflemen who had been attacked and suffered heavy damage to the Imperial Guard units. A unit of Yari Cavalry survived and withdrew, no doubt to trouble her again later.

Still, the enemy cavalry force had been virtually destroyed, and the surviving units wouldn't be able to inflict the kind of chaos a luckier force might have been able to pull off. Now it was a matter largely of infantry vs. infantry.

She looked over at Leon's army as he began to engage. Leon's general was close to the action, which was good for morale if he lived, but bad if he was killed. His archers were inflicting losses on Edward's infantry, which were moving forward and were about to fire. Leon's melee infantry were already being shot at and suffering losses. However, they continued to advance. Twilight wasn't sure if Leon's plan would work, but it was probably not the worst idea ever. If she could defeat Luna quickly enough, she might be able to come help him.

Luna wasn't discouraged by the loss of her cavalry. It was true that she had hoped for more, but Twilight was very intelligent, and Leon wasn't a fool, even though he did make mistakes.

She sent her Yari Ashigaru after Leon's only intact cavalry unit, which was just sitting there doing nothing. Apparently, he'd forgotten about it. She was going to make him pay for that.

Her first ashigaru approached. She grinned....

...a grin that turned to shock as almost half of the unit was shot down in seconds.

"What the -" She just barely managed to keep from cussing... barely. "What in the name of the stars!?"

She quickly zoomed in on the unit in question. All of them were armed with muskets, with the barrels having a cone-like end.

"Oh," she said to herself. "I probably should have looked up what 'donderbuss' meant before the battle started."

She ordered a retreat at once. The unit that had taken the initial blasts had been routed, shattered. It wasn't coming back, not when only fifty men out of 120 were still alive. And as she pulled back, Leon sent the unit forward, where it continued to inflict a horrendous number of losses on the retreating units.

That wasn't forgetfulness; he deliberately waited for that to happen. Luna felt a sense of reluctant admiration. It had been a good tactic against someone who had no idea what the unit could do. Just because she admired the move didn't mean that she intended to let it happen again, though.

She had her archers target the incoming cavalry, which disengaged and fell back; in fact, Leon moved it to the other side of his army, ostensibly for use against Edward.

"Well played," she murmured under her breath. "Well played."

"Hmm, what was that?" Eddy asked.

"Never mind. How are you faring?"

"Fine, but he's going to hurt me before I crush him. You might want to be worried about you; that's Twilight you're facing."

"Indeed. Trust that I will not underestimate her."

Leon continued to advance despite loss; a traditional army usually suffered heavy losses against a modern one. And the flanking maneuver had kind of worked; Eddy couldn't concentrate his fire against any particular unit, because he was forced to turn them to face the units Leon sent at him.

Still, Leon felt his heart sink a little at the casualties he was taking. His men did manage to reach the enemy lines, where they began doing some pounding of their own. His cavalry, although in tatters, came in from behind to hit the enemy general. If the general could be taken out, perhaps the losses he'd taken would be worth it.

On the front line, men hacked, bashed, and stabbed at one another. Swords slashed and jabbed; blue and orange soldiers fell, with yells of pain. Most of the losses were orange; in general, units dedicated to melee, like the tetsubo hero and Katana Samurai, were naturally better at melee combat than most gun-armed units. There were exceptions; the Portuguese Tercios, wither their heavy swords and armor, would defend castle walls extremely well. But naturally, Eddy didn't have access to those, not with a modern army.

Even so, the orange soldiers had more men remaining. Leon activated the Gunbatte and Rally abilities from his general to keep his men in the fight, as well as activating the Banzai ability on the No-dachi Samurai, which made it impossible to rout them for a time. However, these were measures that could only buy time. His units at the front could be overwhelmed by sheer numbers.

"Come on, come on... No!" he hissed angrily as his cavalry began to rout, one after the other. In frustration, he ordered his Hand Mortars to fire on Eddy's general. Moments later, he got the message that the enemy commander had been killed. He breathed a sigh of relief; that had been lucky.

And the effects showed. Eddy's soldiers immediately knew that their commander had fallen, and two banners, both representing units that had been hit hard by the melee attack, began to flicker. Leon grinned.

Eddy's guns had gone silent during the melee. Now, one of the gun crews opened fire; the shell landed in the middle of a group of struggling soldiers; men from both sides were thrown around like broken toys.

He took personal control over that gun. Apparently, he doesn't want me to win that easy. The one gun probably wasn't going to turn the tide. In fact, many of the soldiers who were killed by the gun were Eddy's own.

Leon prepared to send his Donderbuss Cavalry to finish the job, but it wasn't necessary; other units began to flicker and rout. Soon enough, the enemy artillerymen were falling to swords and heavy, spiked clubs.

Leon watched as the enemy army began to disintegrate. He sent the cavalry in anyway; he wanted more veterancy for it, and killing routing units was the easiest way to get it.

Leon sighed. His units, though victorious, had suffered massive casualties; his Tetsubo unit had only ten men out of an original thirty standing. His other units were little better. Two were so badly demoralized at the loss of men that they routed even though the fight had been won. One Katana Samurai unit had about thirty six men, another forty nine, with a No-Dachi unit left with twenty five. His bow units had ben shredded; most were gone, routed, with the one unit of Bow Monks reduced to twenty men. His cavalry had been all but destroyed, with the Donderbuss troops being about the only unit he still had that had suffered almost no losses. His general was still alive, but only five other men remained in the unit with him.

He looked to the left. Twilight had engaged Luna in combat. Luna was using her ashigaru to shield her main line units. It was a ruthless tactic, and he doubted that she'd use it in a real conflict, but it had the effect of allowing the real combat units to advance without being shot up too badly. The bow units kept up brisk fire on Twilight's Guard units, inflicting casualties and reducing the number of riflemen who were shooting at the incoming troops.

Leon moved to outflank Luna. His badly reduced army would ordinarily be no match for her army, but considering that the Princess was engaged already, he would probably be able to do something good.

Luna watched as her soldiers finally reached Twilight's lines and began cutting into the violet-clad infantry. Her own men, wearing blue that was even darker than that of Leon's warriors, who were forming up to her right. That wasn't good; she had engaged Twilight with almost her entire force, with only her general free. Only a unit of No-Dachi were free to fight the newcomers.

She sent them. Leon's army outnumbered her lone unit, but not substantially. She activated the Banzai ability as they closed. With that matter taken care of, or at least dealt with for now, she turned back to the fight with Twilight.

The purple unicorn was trying to hold off her army. The Imperial Guard units were better at melee combat than Imperial Infantry, and were holding their own. She switched her archers to fire at Twilight's artillery. Purple and blue soldiers fell, swords flashed, and warriors shouted battle cries.

In spite of everything Twilight could do, Luna's units were still better at melee combat than hers, and they were starting to really bring the pressure on her. Twilight's troops were losing the battle. The unicorn was attempting to disengage some of her frontline units, but that wouldn't do any good for the units still engaged. Luna could see Twilight's remaining gunners start to pack up their guns in an effort to get them out of danger.

Ha! Which army is the best now?

On the bad side, her No-Dachi were getting overrun; Leon had surrounded the unit and engaged it on all sides. Leon's general and Bow Monks had ignored the fight completely and were now shooting at the flank of the Katana Samurai on the rightmost of the melee.

"Hmm." Luna had her general activate his Gunbatte and Rally abilities, hoping to push the fight with Twilight to it's conclusion.

Hopefully, we can get this done in time. Not that he has much, but a flank attack now would be bad. At least I have a cavalry unit coming behind my general in order to... wait, we have no cavalry left...

The unit that had caught her attention suddenly stopped just behind her general and mowed him and his guard down with shotgun blasts.

Oh, blast and botheration! it's Leon's stinking cavalry!

"Oooh, that sucked," Eddy commented.

"You think!?"

Leon didn't stop there. His unit, after routing her general, moved up behind her frontline units to attack them. To top off the disaster, her No-Dachi had finally been overwhelmed, and the three men left were running.

Luna sighed. She had no choice. She began to withdraw her units from the battle; she left a few as a sacrificial rear guard, to prevent Twilight from coming after her immediately.

I have one more surprise waiting; I hope it's enough to turn the fight around.

Leon felt a surge of happiness as Luna began to retreat. They had the enemy on the ropes, and he had his doubts that the other side could turn things around. He began his pursuit; Twilight was still dealing with leftover units.

"We whipped them!" he said out loud. "We whipped 'em, and now they'll pay the price!"

"We did, but be careful. Oh, and please don't mention the idea of whipping to a pony. I know what you meant, but..."

"Oh. We licked 'em, then."

"Better. but I don't think the licking's over. Luna's still going to put up a fight."

"Not enough of one. We got her."

Leon watched as his troops approached a small stand of trees. His cavalry was shooting down the enemy as they fled, and his melee troops weren't far behind.

Suddenly, bombs began falling into the midst of his infantry; they exploded, throwing warriors in all directions.

"What the...?"

Leon looked at the trees; a band of ninjas had thrown the bombs, and were now advancing. He mentally cursed when he saw that one of those three units was Hanzo's Shadows, no doubt one of the best of the DLC units. He watched in surprise as they quickly routed his foot soldiers who had survived the bombing. He was just quick enough to prevent his Donderbuss Cavalry from falling prey to the trap.

"Next time I urge caution, could you please listen to me?"

"Yeah, especially after seeing that."

Leon withdrew his bowmen, which, along with his cavalry and his general, were his only remaining units. Twilight, in the meantime, had routed the units that Luna had left as a rear guard and was now advancing her entire force. While she had suffered heavy losses, her force was still numerous, and she still had three cannons out of four in action. Leon stopped his retreat and turned his exhausted units around.

Twilight's infantry approached the little group of trees. Some stopped, facing the trees, while others continued. Leon nodded. The unicorn was going to surround the position before directly engaging it.

Apparently, Luna saw this, and moved to counter it. Her other units began to attack the units on the flank. For about thirty seconds, things went okay for them, but Twilight brought up reinforcements, which blasted the attackers with rifle fire. All too soon, counterattack became retreat.

With that threat taken care of, Twilight finished surrounding the woods, then advanced a troops of Guards forward. More bombs were thrown their ways, but the enemy ninjas were revealed, and Twilight turned her artillery on them. Shells exploded in their midst, and the ninjas, likely to die to no good purpose if they simply remained where they were, launched a savage attack against the Guard unit they had bombed. Before Twilight could bring up her other units, they had succeeded in routing it.

It did them no good. Twilight's men shot them down. After another half minute of firing, the battle was over as the few surviving ninjas fled.

"Costly victory," Leon said, reading the message that came up. "Well, yeah."

"I suppose congratulations are in order," Luna said as she and Eddy came back on their channel.

"That was close," Twilight said. "You almost had us."

"We might have done better, if not for that forsaken unit of cavalry Leon had," Luna grumbled.

"Hey, next time, buy the DLC before coming to battle, and you'll have them to play with too."

"Oh, I'll make sure of that," Luna said. She chuckled unexpectedly. "I suppose I can hardly complain. But next time, we'll win. Count on it."

Author's Note

Please do not turn this into a debate over religion. I think Luna had a valid question, which a lot of people who play the game may also have had, and I merely sought to explain it. I do not wish to attack anyone, merely explain history. I will delete the passage if people want me to.

Interplanetary, game 1; Myths, misconceptions, questions, and lasers

"Is this working?" Luna asked. She blew into he headset, as if to clear it.

"I think so," Leon answered.

"I don't think there's any reason to think it isn't," Celestia said.

"Oh, yep," Edward said quickly. "Someone just made a comment; it's definitely working."

"Alright." Princess Luna cleared her throat. "Welcome, viewers, to our Interplanetary Livestream!" she said in a happy voice.

"Where we'll be seeing who can blow everyone else off the face of the universe," Eddy broke in.

"Indeed," the Princess agreed. "Even so, this is not the only benefit our viewers will be experiencing. We - more to the point, I - will be answering questions regarding Equestria, as well as addressing misconceptions and myths about our fair land."

"That 'our' in the royal sense?" Leon asked, jokingly.

"Let the viewers make of it as they may," Luna replied, sounding slightly amused herself, and Celestia chuckled quietly. "Hopefully, the answers were able to provide will be able to satisfy those who wish to know more about our world."

"In any case, let's get going," Eddy said.

Leon watched as the image onscreen - that of an orange and blue planet, with a list of his, Eddy's, Celestia's and Luna's Steam names - switched to a loading screen, then switched to a solar system.

Leon saw that the planet under his control has a blue line tracing its orbit around the sun. It was also the furthest inhabited planet away from that same sun.

"Right, people might not understand what this game is about," Eddy commented. "Care to explain, Leo?"

"Oh me?"

"Yeah, you; I don't know anyone else I call Leo."

"Oh, well then..." Leon cleared his throat. "Ahem... basically, each player controls a planet, and for whatever reason - insults, mining rights, or just outright warmongering, everyone wants to destroy the civilizations on the other planets in their solar system. You end up building up an economy to fund the giant guns, lasers, and missiles that you shoot at those other planets."

"Think of Defcon, only focused on multiple planets with even more destructive weaponry," Eddy added.

"Yeah. And it's not just a point of aiming and firing; you have to take into account how gravity and planetary rotation and orbit will affect your shots. Note that some planets orbit the sun clockwise and others counterclockwise, which is unrealistic but adds a bit more challenge and unpredictability to the game."

"It still catches me off guard when humans say that worlds orbit suns and not the other way around," Luna mentioned.

"I can understand why," Celestia commented. "It was a little unsettling for me when I understood, but since then I've accepted that our world is but a special case."

"Not that I do not enjoy astronomy, mind you," Luna went on. "I love borrowing books on the subject, as well as going to the Canterlot Observatory to view the stars and planets for myself, but being used to living on a planet where the rulers of one country control the sun and moon makes this a little..."

"Uncomfortable?" Leon asked.

"Not quite. Somewhere between that and fascinating."

"Oh, I almost forgot," Leon added. "You cannot destroy the sun in the game."

"That's rather obvious, wouldn't you say?" Celestia said. "That would kill everyone. The very thought makes me shiver."

"Yeah, I know. Just putting something in in case people think its possible."

"Might as well start playing," Eddy suggested.

Leon didn't need to be told twice. He set up a solar plant and a mine off one of his five cities; every player had five cities they had to try to protect, which trying to destroy the five cities of the other players; the last player who had any cities left won the game. Every facility had to be connected to a power source or else it would cease to function. He didn't set up any railguns, which were the only weapons available to him; few players set up a weapon on their first turn, especially seeing that they wouldn't run without power. He set up one more mine, then was out of resources to place. He looked at the blue circle in the upper left corner of the display. That displayed how much material his planet had; the game was one where material could run out, although a player could theoretically continue the game on power alone, which was renewable; one didn't need to have operational mines in order to fire existing weapons, although it was necessary to build additional ones. He also began his research.

He examined his planet; it was mostly white, indicating a snowy climate, which wasn't surprising, considering how far it was from the sun. Eddy's planet was approximately middle way between Leon and the sun, while Celestia's was closest to the sun, which amused hi mto no end. Luna was somewhere between him and Ed.

"So, Leo, what do your people look like?" Eddy asked.

"They're basically human, only blue," he answered. Of course, he had no way of really knowing; there was no race or species in the game per se, so players often made them up. "They make their homes underground, and built up over-ground cities slowly and painstakingly over millennia, with big domes to protect them from the freezing, below zero temperature."

"Not for long, if I have anything to say about it."

"Well what do your people look like?"

"They're basically wolves who stand on two legs, and they're all clones."

"My people are camel people, and lived in tents for thousands of years before building their magnificent desert cities," Celestia said without prompting.

"Mine are giant bats who love the nighttime and sleep during the day," Luna noted.

Each of them ended their turn, and waited and watched as the planets in the system - including some that were uninhabited, placed as further obstacles that could block laser and railgun shots.

"Alright," Luna said," Misconception number one; because ponies are not shown wearing nail-on horseshoes in the show means they don't use them for that purpose. This is inherently false; ponies have been wearing horseshoes nailed to their hooves for thousands of years. They still wear them today. For some reason, the show's animators haven't depicted ponies as wearing them; in one episode in season five, for example, the ponies in the rodeo, as well as Trouble Shoes and some other ponies, were wearing horseshoes in that manner; how else would you account for the horseshoe print in the ground that Trouble left at the beginning of the episode? Which leads us to a second misconception; that pony hooves are made of marshmellow or flesh or something of the sort. Again, false. Pony hooves are made entirely out of keratin, a material without nerves, and cannot bend or feel. Our hooves actually differ from those of earth horses in that there is no frog or fleshy parts; it's all keratin, all through and on every surface. Our hooves are hard, unfeeling, and, despite what a few scenes depict, unbending."

"Then what's the use of wearing horseshoes in the first place?" Eddy asked.

"Applejack and other farmers use them while doing tasks such as pulling plows and carts to increase their ability to get a good footing on the ground. Other times, it's better for nail-on horseshoes to be used for gripping the ground than to rely on boots that can get stuck and slip off."

"Can't the horseshoe just be held on by the pony in question?"

"No. It's true we can hold things, but the diameter of the effect where we can hold things with our hooves is activated in the fetlock and is only about an inch in diameter at the bottom center of the hoof. It does not extend to the outer wall of the hoof, so the horseshoe would have to be nailed on to stay. It's not a painful procedure by any means," Luna was quick to add. "Without nerves in our hooves, we cannot feel the nails per se, though we can definitely feel the vibration in our legs as the nails go in. And we're careful to make nails for the purpose short, so they don't stick too far upward. And we've attempted to use spells to hold them in place instead of nails, but that interferes with out ability to pick things up."

"Right, that consumed about a minute in which we could have been playing the game," Leon said.

"Oh, is it our turn to play again?" Luna asked, a little surprised. "Right then."

Leon built another solar plant, and then added a railgun to the network, as well as another mine. He didn't have enough energy to fire his new weapon on this turn, but on the next he would be able to get in a good shot at someone.

"'What's better to have, lasers or cannons?'" Eddy read off one comment. "Well, railguns can do a lot of damage, but they're very inaccurate. Lasers are more precise, but require an un interrupted shot between your planet and that of your enemy. Asteroid Diversions and Solar Lasers work in the same way as railguns and lasers respectively, but they're bigger versions of those weapons and require a lot of power. Oh, and you have to mind what side you have your weapons on, seeing as your planet rotates every turn, so you have to build so that at least some of your weapons can face a target at any time. On some planets its harder to do, especially if your cities are all on one side or if you have oceans completely covering one side."

"Ugh," Leon said, having been in that kind of scenario more than once. "Only advantage there is that sometimes your cities will be safe from enemy weapons simply because they can't get at them to shoot them."

"Yeah. And I think none of us have any reason no to go to the next turn already." Leon hit the end turn button accordingly.

"On to the next misconception," Luna said. "Number three; my sister only eats cake, and nothing else."

"Obviously false," Celestia said. "Don't get me wrong, I love cake as much as the next pony, but my diet consists of fruits and vegetables, just like everypony else. I wouldn't be so thin if I ate as much cake as the fanbase thinks."

"Misconception number four," Luna went on. "My sister and I regularly engage in practical jokes and like 'trolling,' as it were."

"I like a good laugh," Celestia commented. "But I don't put others down just to get a kick out of things. My ponies deserve better than that."

"Right, and-" Luna stopped talking. A shot had gone out. "Who fired?"

"Not sure," Leon said, "But it's going right toward Celestia..."

"Oh dear," the white alicorn in question murmured.

The railgun projectile flew, closing in... then veered away, curved around the planet, struck the sun and exploded.

"And missed," Leon said.

"Who fired?" Luna asked again.

"I did," Ed claimed. "Thought I could get an early nick in. I can tell that gravity is a little weird in this game."

"That happens a lot," Leon said. "It's not just you. If the shot is heading directly at the planet, it will generally hit, but if it's a little off, it will usually slingshot around."

"Can't wait for lasers, then."

The time came for the players to further develop their worlds... and take shots at other planets. Leon added two more solar plants and another railgun, all three on the other side of the planet from the other gun and installations. That left him with barely enough energy to fire his existing railgun. He began to aim it. Aiming railguns wasn't just a job of saying "shoot here" and letting it fire. The red line that went out from his planet showed the arcing line the projectile would take showed that it wasn't going to be anywhere near straight.

Leon aimed carefully at Eddy's planet. It would be approaching his own world, as the two were going in opposite directions around the sun (Leon's counterclockwise, Eddy's clockwise), so it wouldn't be a particularly difficult shot. He lined it up soon enough, but had to adjust his aim several times before he was satisfied.

"Okay, end turn." He clicked the button,

As they waited, Luna cleared her throat again. "Ahem. Now, misconception number five. Equestria and the world its in is free from war, crime, and all forms of evil that are in the human world." A sound came through the headset; it sounded like she had tapped her hoof on her desk. "This is one of the most common beliefs held about Equestria. And, sadly, it's utterly wrong. There are wars, if somewhat fewer than on human Earth, perhaps because there are fewer nations and ethnicities. There is also crime; Manehattan is well known for it, and for the various gangs there are. Luckily, magic helps, as do the police and Royal Guard, but it still exists."

"I think we should start answering questions," Celestia said. "Our viewers can ask questions in the livestream chat. However," she added, with her voice hardening, "all inappropriate questions will be deleted unanswered, and questions that are otherwise offensive or for means of flaming and trolling will be deleted."

"Oh, here we go," Eddy said as the game finally got to simulating the turn. Eddy again shot at Celestia. This time, his shot outright missed, went around the sun, then looped back and hit Luna.

"Bother," the Lunar Princess groaned.

Leon's shot went straight where it was supposed to go. It was less him hitting the enemy world and more of the planet running into the shot.

"Oh, bother," Eddy said quietly.

The next turn began.

Leon heard Eddy laugh. "Ya hit me, yeah, but you didn't hit anything, just empty land."

"Ugh. Next one is going to do some damage." Leon set up another two solar planets as well as a third railgun.

"'Is the Royal Guard militarily deficient?'" Luna read, sounding offended. "No. No, no, and no again!"

"This seems to be a common question," Celestia noted. "No, the Guard are not deficient or just there for show. They engage in up-to-date training, and, with the portal between our worlds, have gained access to modern tactics and weaponry. They still carry spears most of the time, but don't be fooled; they're now just as good with guns are they are with spears."

"The problem is, whenever the Guard have been depicted, they're made to appear powerless before enemies like her, Tirek, and the Changeling Queen," Luna muttered. "Which can all be answered. Rest assured that military against military, the Guard is quite potent, and can fight with the best of them."

"How widespread are modern arms in Equestria?" Leon asked.

"They're only in use among the Royal Guard; civilians are forbidden to own them as is, and there are only a few hundred in use, which is enough for the Guard, seeing as their numbers aren't enormous. Equestria has an emergency draft law, in case of an emergency."

"Couldn't ya just use the Elements or some big magical attack to stop an enemy army?" Eddy asked. "Or better yet, melt them to nothing with the sun?"

"The Elements now reside - permanently - in the Tree of Harmony," Celestia said. "The Elements were best used against a single, very powerful opponent; they weren't well designed for defeating an army. And as for the sun, I can only use my magic to move it. I would never use it in such a way even if I had that power. There are limits to what magic can do, on the field of battle as well as in every day life." She paused. "Just because one has power does not mean that it has to be used. I think this game somewhat illustrates that point."

Meanwhile, the next barrage began; Leon had aimed two railguns at Eddy, who shot once back at him and a third time at Celestia. Luna shot one shot each at Leon and Eddy. Celestia shot at Ed as well. Eddy finally scored a hit; Leon groaned as his own planet was hit, through he took satisfaction that both his shots had connected. Luna and Celestia both hit their targets.

This time, damage had been done. Leon winced as he noted that one of his cities had been hit, though it was still standing. One of his mines had been damaged, as had one of his solar plants. He set both to repair. He couldn't do much for the city, other than wait for the population to grow to replace that which had been lost. He took satisfaction that the messages on the right side of the screen listed buildings that had been damaged on other planets. He had apparently damaged two enemy mines, as well as getting a hit on a city; railgun projectiles seemed to split once they hit an atmosphere, acting like shotgun pellets... assuming the pellets were the size of asteroids.

He set up another two mines, as well as a solar plant and a telescope, which would help him to gain intelligence on enemy planets, as well as building another railgun. He set his three existing guns to fire again, one at Eddy and the other two at Luna before hitting the end turn button.

"Here's another one," Luna said as they waited for the turn to be simulated. "'Are ponies the same size as they are in the show?'"

"I'd have to say no," Celestia answered. "Twilight, for example, is almost as tall as an average human, perhaps a few inches shorter. I'm close to the size of a regular earth-sized horse, and Luna, while somewhat shorter, still stands at a significant height. Most ponies are shorter than ponies in the human world, but don't be deceived; the show exaggerates numerous things, size being included."

"Which leads to misconception number six," Luna added. "'Ponies are invincible.' Untrue. Most viewers think this because of scenes like the one in the first season where Twilight gets hit in the head by an anvil; that didn't really happen, or she wouldn't be here now. I think the object was a flowerpot or something, but the show's developers spruced up the scene. They did that other times, like when they made it seem that Applejack threw herself off the platform, designed to launch Rainbow Dash into the air, and became flatter than a pancake when she missed. That's impossible. There are other examples, and I'm sure you can find them if you look hard enough. Its true that Pinkie seems to break some of the rules we know about, but I'm sure that there's an explanation of sorts. All we need to do is find it."

The turn began to play out. Leon's three shots all missed their intended targets, but one (which had been shot at Luna) looped around the sun and hit Celestia instead. Celestia shot Leon, Luna shot Leon and Eddy, and Eddy shot Leon and Luna.

"Oh, that's gonna leave a mark," Leon said. Two mines and a couple solar plants had been damaged, with one of the latter having suffered such damage as to have almost been destroyed. He set them to repair, set up another mine and a couple more telescopes, and added a kinetic defense to protect some of his stuff. The kinetic defense could shoot down railgun shells, but it required him to leave some power over for the turn, otherwise it would be inoperative and wouldn't work.

"Ouch, three mines and a plant knocked out. Hope I can buff out the dents for next turn," Eddy said quietly.

"Yeah." Leon clicked on the Briton's planet. "I see you," he said in a mischievous voice.

He really could, too, or at least a little. The telescopes had given him a 34% view of the enemy planet, meaning that he could see about 34% of the structures, including cities, on it.

"Oh, can you, ya blighted bugger?"

"Yep. Nice mine near your northern-most city."

"Yeah, its been hit twice already."

"Which one, the city or the mine?"

"Both."

Leon laughed, as did Ed.

"Well, all of you missed hitting anything on my world," Celestia broke in, "but all the craters from your guns have made something looking like a smiley face."

Leon looked at her planet as well. Sure enough, there were two craters that seemed to be eyes, one for a nose, and five in what did, if you really stretched your imagination, look something like a crooked smile. "Oh yeah," he said, chuckling. "That city just above the eyes looks like a crown, too."

"So there's some beauty in the middle of a solar system-wide apocalypse," Eddy commented, chuckling a little as well.

"Hmph. Nothing like that on my planet," Luna huffed. "Two cities hit in one turn, and two mines damaged."

"You'll get used to it. we already have."

"Very funny... Not."

"'Are you both - that is to say... are either or both of you... divine?'" Celestia read from the comments. "Quite a shy one there."

"Hold on," Luna interrupted. "I know that account, it's Fl-" She stopped when Celestia coughed. "Oh, right."

"A common belief, held by many ponies," Celestia said, addressing the question. "But common knowledge also lays this idea to rest. Neither I nor my sister were around when the sun and moon were controlled by the unicorn tribe in pre-unification days. My great-grandmother was the founder of our dynasty. Even today, I'm not sure just how the alicorn race began; it's a mystery that's been lost to time, and my great forebear never left any volumes on the subject. However, we were, in the eyes of most ponies in that era, the perfect symbol of unification for all three former tribes, considering that we share traits from all three. Considering that we spend most of our time in Canterlot, our earth pony abilities - which is to say, superior strength and a talent for farming the soil - are usually not shown off."

"Wait, so you're as strong as, say, Applejack?" Leon asked.

"Well, not quite, but the other day I ended up breaking a stone table in two by accident. Although it would have helped if the ambassadors from Iran hadn't been... Ahem," she said catching herself. "To answer the original question directly, no, neither Luna, I, nor any other alicorn are gods. We are born, live, have the same experiences as other ponies, and, eventually, die."

"Not that saying so will convince anypony," Luna muttered. "They'll just claim we're lying for divine purposes, as if that's not a contradiction in terms."

"Ah, here is another one.... 'why do you hang around with these two lowlife human dimwits?'" Celestia quoted, sounding unpleasantly surprised.

"WHAT!?!" Luna bellowed in anger. "Who said that!?!"

"I'm not going to bother answering that one; the only reason I read it was because I initially skipped over it too fast. However, if that doesn't prove that ponies aren't perfect, I don't know what ever will. I can only assume that the writer of the question is one of my own subjects who harbors racism toward humans, and possibly other races as well. Or it could be a griffon or minotaur with the same problem. It may even be a human pretending." She sighed. "Regardless, that comment has been deleted, and the account, I'm sorry to say, has been banned from the livestream."

"I will answer," Luna said in her turn. "They are my friends, that's why. And no ruler has ever had such a pair of friends in the history of two worlds. They aren't perfect, but then nopony is."

"Thanks, Princess," Leon said, touched.

"Yeah, sorry for being morons so much of the time," Eddy added."

"That's alright. Plus, that just means I get to beat the two of you more easily," Luna teased.

"Oy!"

"Another question, and this one isn't offensive," Celestia said. "'Did the events in Equestria Girls and its sequel ever happen?'"

"No," Luna answered. "The idea was purely fictional. It never occurred. There is no mirror like that depicted in the movie, and, as far as any of us are aware, no other universe resembling that supposedly in the film."

Leon set up a couple more solar plants, a couple more telescopes, and another kinetic defense. "Well, Equestria Girls does exist, after a fashion."

'How?"

"In that song they used back in... was it 2012? It was basically a ponified version of the song 'California Girls.'"

"Oh, yes," Celestia answered. "I remember that one. Pinkie loved to sing it. But that's the only truth about that phrase; the events in the movie, as my sister just said, did not happen."

Leon clicked the end turn button. So far, his planet hadn't been damaged that badly. Hopefully things would continue down that route.

"'Where do the concepts for bridles and saddles come from, if they are never used in the fashion that they were designed for?'" Luna read off one comment. "'Reins, too.'"

"Better not ask a question like that in Equestria proper," Celestia commented. "I will not tolerate my subjects being treated in the same manner as Earth horses. Anyone I find doing so will be locked in jail and prosecuted under Equestrian law. However, to answer your question, they were all ideas somepony thought up at some point or another. The idea of reins came originally from earth pony farmers who worked together on farms, especially when more than one pony was needed to do a job, to coordinate pulling and controlling. Carriages still use them today, but in today's society, except in places like Appleloosa and other towns of similar make, the use is falling away, not least because ponies prefer to be free to make their own decisions. Hundreds of years ago, it was a different story, one of survival."

"The bridle is still traditional in events like rodeos," Luna said. "But other than that - and the occasional, bejeweled objects some ponies wear purely for fashion - they are generally not used. As for saddles, they were indeed designed for riding, but usually it would be a younger member of the family, one who could not be expected to travel long distances, who would be sitting on it. For example, a father or mother might wear a saddle, even today, to carry their children if they are travelling long distances on hoof. However, as my sister warned, do not misunderstand. Unless a pony willingly consents to bear another being on their back, it is considered bullying or harassment and carries the same penalty. That warning is applied to humans, griffons, minotaurs, diamond dogs, and even other ponies, along with any other self-aware being. Do not take this for an idle threat; we will prosecute violators of personal privacy and dignity. " Luna paused, waiting for herself to calm down a little. "Today, saddles are usually worn simply because they're considered fashionable, and not for any practical purposes."

Leon watched as the events of the turn played out. Celestia's planet lashed out with lasers at Eddy, as well as sending a single railgun projectile each at Leon and Luna, both of which fortunately missed. All other rounds launched that turn missed their intended targets are well; everyone was relatively distant from one another due to their orbits.

"Might have figured the one who controls the sun would be the first to use a light-based weapon," Leon muttered.

"Oh, what ever gave you that idea?" Celestia asked, before breaking out in laughter.

"Ugh, you blew up two of my telescopes," Eddy complained. "Don't you know that you need eyes to see?"

"If I just let you view my planet without taking precautions, you'd do the same."

"Well... maybe..."

"'Is English the main language used in Equestria?" Luna quoted off a comment. "Yes, it is, though its commonly referred to as Equestrian. French is the second most common, followed by Italian, German, and here and there some Spanish, along with Swahili spoken by our few zebra immigrants."

"A lot of our audience are probably surprised that so many of the languages of our worlds match," Celestia noted. "Much of it is that our two worlds have had some rare contact, and here and there languages and words were traded. A few of our ideas came from human things, although until recently most have forgotten."

"'Are there native humans in Equestria?' No," Luna answered off the bat. "No. I know that there are a few fan-made stories that are based off of Gulliver's Travels, but those are, as Equestria Girls is, purely fictional. Not that I can't understand the idea," she added. "Ponies are sometimes hesitant to go into the human world, considering the domestication of horses and ponies there. Eventually most get over it and realize that equines on Earth are not the same as those in Equestria, but the worry still lingers."

"Most pony-human interactions are the same as between most people," Celestia observed. "That's why a recent film made in Equestria called The Truth about Humanity is so galling, as it plays on the fears you just mentioned, dear sister. It's nothing but pure, biased foolishness, based on false ideas of human Earth. It reminds me of the awful and hateful films the Nazis made as propaganda in World War II." She paused for a moment. "It might be the reason our little friend asked the offensive question a few minutes ago, or at least a factor."

"I've never heard of it," Leon noted.

"That's because its never been released outside Equestria. I'm hoping there's nothing like that on Earth about us?"

"Well..." Leon sighed and scratched his head. "I don't like it, but there was this one film - not one made by an actual company, you understand - that said ponies are hypnotizing us using their magic and are trying to get us to accept pony domination over our world."

"What? Who could possibly buy into that?" Luna demanded, shocked.

"Luckily, about the same small percentage as buy into that movie Celestia was talking about."

"Oh, good. I must confess that it's oddly comforting to know that the bad feelings aren't just ours."

"Pretty lousy thing to take comfort over," Ed broke in.

"You're right, of course," Luna answered him. "It is. So let's start talking about the opposite; the positive relations between humanity and ponies, to say nothing of the other races."

"'Why did you choose to contact us after hearing about all the wars and stuff?'" Celestia read. "As I've said before, our world isn't immune to conflicts, plagues, and other terrible things. I'm quite aware of the threats we potentially face from the human world. Rest assured that nobody passes into Equestria without thorough examination, which includes having them made to sleep and having my sister check what is in their minds. It may be a violation of privacy, but it ensures that terrorists and criminals don't get through. We've caught several people who had bad intentions to say the least. There have been complaints, but unless we find something more effective, this practice will remain active policy."

"All that is true, but it doesn't answer the question that was asked," Luna observed.

"Oh right. Well, some ponies were put off when they learned about this world's troubles, but I know that there is good in all peoples; ponies, griffons, minotaurs, diamond dogs - yes, diamond dogs - Americans, French, British, Japanese. All have great numbers of people with good hearts and good intentions."

"And the reason for this are purely altruistic?" Eddy asked.

"Admittedly, trade opportunities and the hope that we could trade medicine and knowledge of disease were big factors in making the decision. And a lot of ponies and other people from our world have adventurous hearts and wanted to explore and study a different world. But them mutual aid we could offer one another was our chief reason."

Leon build a couple data complexes, which were designed to counter enemy intelligence, making it harder for foes to be able to see his planet. He also set up another mine, a solar plant, and another gun. He set all four of his guns that could bear to fire at Luna and Celestia, who were the only targets he could hit at present.

"'Why can sheep and cows talk, but are treated as livestock?'" Luna read. "All of you must understand, cattle tend to like nothing better than standing around, eating grass all day. They tend not to be as energetic as ponies when it comes to things like politics, government, and anything outside of their places of residence. Sheep are very shy creatures who want some measure of protection. They also aren't very expressive when it comes to 'important matters', as it were."

"Which isn't to say that they don't have equal rights," Celestia broke in. "They do. They can run for office as much as any other citizen of Equestria. Indeed, we've had a few take one office or another. But most - indeed, the vast majority - don't bother to exercise that right. They prefer the protection of living on farms, as well as the certainty of food there. In millennia past, they were hunted by timberwolves and all sorts of carnivorous creatures, which still affects their thinking. Even though they've been relatively safe for hundreds of years, memories of that still run through them like wildfire. So it's not an issue of maltreatment or oppression, but one of voluntary symbiosis and mutual benefit, as well as a lack of energy for politics."

The turn once more began to play out. All but one of Leon's shots missed; the one that hit struck Celestia. Celestia blasted her sister's planet with lasers, and Ed lashed out at both of them with lasers of his own. Leon got hit by a railgun shot from Ed.

"Ugh," he groaned as he examined the damage. "You hit one of my telescopes. Thanks."

"All in a day's work," Eddy said in a cheeky voice.

"Speaking of a day's work, we're almost out of time," Celestia remarked. "Sorry that it's so short, but sadly, my sister and I have royal duties to perform and crises to solve." She chuckled. "I suppose that ruling has its downsides. We have time for another... two or three questions, and one more turn."

"'Do equine diseases on Earth affect ponies?'" Luna quoted. "To some extent, yes. Our bodies and organs are not exactly like our counterparts on Earth, but they carry enough similarities for some plagues to affect both. Some are common on both worlds. Colic, for instance," she said, with a shudder in her voice. "That terrible scourge..."

"Perhaps we should move onto a different topic.," Celestia suggested. "'Is Equestria the only pony nation in existence?' No. There are wild pony tribes, as well as a small duchy here and there. However, Equestria is undoubtedly the nation where the vast majority of ponies reside.."

"'Do democratic and republican ideals exist in the pony world?'" Luna read. "Hmmm. Nowhere close to the extent that it does in, say, the United States. The current ruling body of most major nations are absolute monarchs. However, it has taken hold in a smaller way. For example, in Equestria, mayors are elected, and aren't just local nobles the way they used to be. Clubs and businesses also take votes. So, while not a factor in the ruling bodies of most countries in our world, democratic principles have taken effect."

"Hmm. And now we take our last turn," Celestia said quietly.

Leon built a laser of his own. "Are we saving this game for future play?" he asked.

"Oh, definitely," Luna replied. In fact, we're planning another livestream with this game."

"Ah. Good. So what I build here won't be for nothing."

"Indeed."

Knowing that, Leon added another solar plant and a second laser.

The turn was very eventful. A laser beamed from the direction of the sun, striking Eddy full blast.

"And solar laser, of course, built first by Celestia," Leon muttered.

"Can't help using sun-based weaponry, can I, considering I control it?" Celestia chuckled.

Ed wasn't the only target. Leon got hit by lasers as well. His railguns struck both Princesses. Someone - Leon wasn't sure who - must have set up an asteroid diversion weapon, for a comet and some surrounding asteroids came flying from outside the solar system and hit Celestia hard.

"Huzzah!" Luna cheered.

"Nice shot, little sister."

Eddy, meanwhile, managed to get everyone with multiple railgun projectiles. One looped around the sun and hit Luna in the face... assuming planets could be said to have faces.

"Feel my wrath," the Briton said, in a mock-evil voice. "Muhhahahahaha!"

"Just wait till the turn is over," Celestia said teasingly. "I don't think you'll like what I ended up doing."

Sure enough... "Bloody hell, I lost a city and two mines, all destroyed."

"I've lost a city of my own, Celestia admitted, "and most of the infrastructure around it. Half my energy-production gone."

"And I got hit by Leon and Edward both," Luna grumbled. "Two cities almost dead, and most of my buildings damaged,"

"Lost another mine damaged, along with three solar plants and a telescope," Leon said reluctantly.

"And that brings this livestream to an end," Celestia announced. "Good-bye to all our viewers, and I hope we can come together again sometime soon!"

"Is it off?" Luna asked, after a few seconds of silence.

"Yes."

"Okay, good. Sorry for the short session tonight, Leon and Edward, but sadly, there's a meeting of national leaders scheduled, and we cannot afford to put it off for the sake of a game."

"We understand," Leon said.

"Yeah. Hope you guys can play again sometime," Edward added.

"Thank you both," Luna said gratefully. "May we meet again soon."

After both Princesses had logged out, Eddy was quick to say, "Hey Leo, want to play a game of our own?"

"You bet!"

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 4); Prusso-French War

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 4); Prusso-French War

Leon made sure he was comfortable as the game began. "Stinking sunburn," he muttered, twitching a little.

"Well, next time remember to use sun lotion," Ed advised.

"Thanks, but its a little late now."

"If you went out at night as opposed to during the daytime, you wouldn't get sunburned," Luna quipped. "The moon can't exactly burn people, can it?"

"Feh." Leon shrugged, not that the others could see it. "Let's just play."

"You brought it up," Eddy reminded him, but adding nothing further.

Leon waited as the other players logged in and the game started. He saw that he was still at war with Mexico from the previous session, though he was currently winning and taking land in Sonora. he intended to annex that state, partly to teach Mexico a lesson and partly to keep the US from declaring a restore order war on him. Mexico, he could beat. The United States, he could not.

Luna, as China, and Shining Armor, as Japan, were still at war with Britain. The war was reaching a stalemate, but Britain still had men to throw into the battle. Fluttershy, as Hawaii, was currently in danger of being annexed by the United States, although Luna, Leon and Shining were expending a lot of influence to save her from being kicked from the game. Leon had discovered that he'd been wrong on a previous occasion when he'd told her that she wouldn't be annexed if the US added her to its sphere. That had been a unpleasant wake up call for both of them.

"About to set the game in motion," Luna announced. "Three, two, one, go!"

"Ugh," Shining groaned. "Another British fleet. That will make things harder. No doubt they have more troops."

"At least they have to invade you by sea. They're sending units by way of Punjab into my western provinces, which have terrible life support."

"Blast it," Eddy muttered. "Prussia sent me their terms, which is to join their sphere, and I really can't refuse them, I'm already going toward the red from their occupation."

"So? At least they didn't eat you."

"No," Ed said dejectedly as he accepted the peace offer, "but... oh, there they go, they just became the North German Confederation."

"Which means France is next," Leon observed.

"Yeah," Eddy agreed.

"Who's England allied which?"

"Neither one. They're allied with Sweden, though. I can tell you that much."

"I see. So they won't be taking part in any European war that doesn't involve them."

"I don't see anything that gives the lie to that. Russia's friendly with France, but you know how that always turns out for the Ruskies."

"Yep," Leon said. Russia usually got whipped by Germany, largely because she was so far behind the times in military technology. Where Germany had, say, seventeen or eighteen military techs, Russia would have maybe eight, maybe ten, twelve if they were lucky. So while they could potentially outnumber the Germans, the Germans had better troops, morale, and all-round technology.

Leon kept having to face Mexican counteroffensives as he took Sonora one piece at a time. He had no idea where the enemy were getting their numbers; most of the mobilized units had been savaged already. "They don't quit, the Mexicans," he observed. "Given the Hispanic fire they spring from, that's not surprising."

"The Spanish gave old Nappy a bite in the arse in the Napoleonic Wars," Eddy agreed again. "So did we."

"Not going to save them from losing Sonora, though," Leon added. He clicked on a Mexican-held territory and checked to see if they were ready for peace. They were, with a very high amount of war exhaustion. He sent his terms on their way, and moments later, Sonora changed from green to cyan.

"Got it."

"Nice, though Chihuahua has gold," Luna observed.

"Yeah, but if I took that without Sonora, Texas would look... er, ugly."

"Why? It would... oh, I see your point," the Princess admitted. "That would look obscene indeed."

With Mexico settled, Leon considered attacking some other country, but decided against it. His units needed to recover, and his immediate territorial hunger was at bay, if not satisfied. He checked his economy briefly, noted that it was fine, then ordered an expansion to the naval base in Sonora that the Mexicans had originally built.

Luna and Shining had managed to beat the British a couple of times, though they'd worn out their own armies doing it. "Don't know how much more of this I can take," Shining said, sounding worried. "My war exhaustion is getting high."

"I'm up to fifty percent exhaustion," Luna said. "I'll be having problems soon if this war continues much longer."

"Might as well check to se what conditions they'll take."

Luna was quiet for a moment. "Oh, they'll take peace," she said, surprised. "They'll even accept being humiliated."

"Good. Russia's long gone in the mean time. Let's just end this, before we both become rebellion central."

A message came up, stating that the British Empire had accepted being humiliated by China. "Best I could do," Luna said, obviously not feeling satisfied. "I wish I'd been able to take something, but my navy is non-existent and the only other way to get at them was being guarded by British armies. Defeating them was difficult. I suppose I'll have to dedicate my attention to military technology for the time being."

"Better than getting wrecked," Leon observed.

"Oh, certainly. But I'd prefer to be making more money."

"Survival before profit."

"True, true."

"Hey," Eddy said, cutting into the conversation. "France just declared war on Germany."

"Wait, what?" Leon said in surprise. "It's usually Germany, or rather the NGF, declaring war on France."

"Not this time. France says they want the Ruhr or something."

"Um, okaaaaaayyy. France acting weird, then." After a moment, he added, "Gonna get stomped.

"Oh yeah," Eddy agreed without hesitation. "Of course, it sort of depend on who the Germans kick first, them or Russia."

"Russia joined?"

"Yep. We both know what's going to happen to them, though."

"England?"

"Still neutral to them both."

Leon watched as provinces began to flip from one color to the other. Russia's face was getting beat in, just as everyone had predicted.

"Hmm, Russia in trouble, eh?" Shining hummed, sounding thoughtful. "Might be a good time to hit 'em."

"Please be careful, and don't call me in right away," Luna advised. "I still have a ridiculous amount of war exhaustion."

"Alright. Hopefully, I don't get caught with the casus belli."

"How have things gone since we last met?" Leon asked.

"Are you referring to the game," Luna asked, "or Equestria?"

"Equestria."

"Ah. Well, we had a breakthrough finding the Changeling hive. We've mustered our forces and are ready for the fight ahead." Luna sounded quiet, much more so than usual.

"That means we'll have Guards fighting," Shining explained. "And... likely... well... we're facing our first war in a very long time."

"Oh." Now Leon understood why the Princess had sounded so unhappy. "Which means dying... on both sides."

"Yes. Of course, we'll try negotiating first. We'd like to settle this peacefully, without bloodshed."

"Couldn't you ask other nations for aid?"

"We are. But some kingdoms think ponies are too... 'soft' is the word they use when they want to be a little more polite. 'Weak' is more common."

"Can you beat the enemy?"

"I think we can. Celestia drafted a large army, so its not just the Guard, and we've imported a lot of modern weaponry. But we have no idea if the Changelings haven't engaged in trafficking weapons, and none of us know their Queen well enough to know exactly what she'll do."

"Is it a war of conquest? To annex the Changelings?"

"No, no, no. It's more of a... well, more of a cut down to size motive. Remove the Queen if she insists on fighting, put someone less warlike in her place, and try to keep an eye on them from now on. If we tried annexing them... we have no experience in dealing with what you call guerilla warfare or urban rebellion."

"And you'd have a hard time keeping your soldiers from... mistreating the Changeling populace, is that right?"

The ponies were silent for a moment. "Think you might have broken them, mate," Ed murmured.

"That would be unfortunate," Leon replied. "I'd have Equestrian police teleporting into my room and dragging me away to suffer whatever punishment they have for people who-"

"Oh, stop your yammering," Luna interrupted. "That's not going to happen. You just touched a nerve, that's all. And your charge has more than a little truth behind it. Many ponies haven't forgiven the Changelings for their invasion. A couple letters... er... called for a 'war to the knife,' which I've interpreted as a call for extermination of the whole Changeling race."

"...I see... I think."

"Luckily, those were the only two letters I've gotten that espouse that view. Most urge a peaceful solution, though the writers tend to be resigned to the use of force if it proves necessary."

"Why haven't I heard of this?" Fluttershy asked.

"We only just released the news a day ago. You know what happens; news in Canterlot can take a few days to reach Ponyville, and in any case, you've been busy helping your animal friends, or so Twilight has written in her letters."

"Hmm. Hopefully the enterprise goes well," Eddy said.

"Is there anything else that's happened?"

"Oh, yes indeed," Luna said, sounding relieved to change the subject. "We received a big petition, signed by thousands of parents, for more of the national budget to be devoted to increased quality of education, and to build bigger schools that could house more students."

"Nice. What's come of it?" Eddy asked.

"Not much, yet. My sister and I, as well as our ministers, are discussing it. Personally, I'm for it, even though it might mean that we'll have to shuffle the national budget a bit, or more than a bit."

"Ugh."

"Exactly. Also, a classroom in one of Canterlot's primary schools were here today on a field trip."

"History related?" Leon asked.

"Yes. At the end of it, they got to see me and my sister. It was a, er, nice experience," the Princess finished, sounding embarrassed.

"Uh, are you sure that's all that happened?" Leon inquired.

"Nope," Shining said, sounding amused. "she's conveniently forgotten that a young colt came up and hugged her around her neck so tightly that he almost choked her, and then she got mobbed by them all embracing her." He laughed. "They actually swept her off her hooves and onto her side, that was how intense it was."

"Shining! I thought I told you not to tell anyone!"

"I didn't know you meant them!"

"I said anyone," Luna insisted, though the slight rise in anger had leveled off. "Although I suppose it had to come out sooner or later."

Leon checked his economy, which had gone down a little. He checked his list of factories for the problem, and sure enough, a new one had been built independently by capitalist investors, who apparently hadn't decided to check whether the market was ripe for an influx of luxury clothing. He would have deleted it, but his current party in power didn't allow that. He rolled his eyes.

In real life, even a corruption-ridden democracy is better than having someone like Stalin or Kin Jong Un in charge, he reminded himself. In Victoria 2, democracy could be hard for the player to utilize effectively, and an absolutist government could be easier to manage, although more progressive rebels plagued monarchies in the mind to late game.

Having beaten both the Confederates and the Mexicans, Leon decided that his position was decent enough. The only place that really had any chance of a revolt was Louisiana, which was natural, considering that Dixie culture wasn't an accepted culture. Mexican culture was accepted by Texas, which meant that the Mexican population wasn't as likely to rebel.

"Huh," Eddy said in amusement. "The big blue blob is actually winning."

"What, France?"

"Yeah."

"How is that possible?"

"I don't know. I can't see over there, and sometimes the outcomes in the game are really weird."

"I hear you on that. I'm assuming that means Russia is getting their teeth kicked in."

"Well, kind of, let me see... hmm, they've lost some provinces to German occupation, but they've taken some as well, so I can't really say for sure if their army is getting the crap kicked out of it. I'd assume so, seeing as it's 1871 and they've only got seven military techs, but results speak louder than statistics."

"Did Germany call you in?"

"No. They didn't bother trying to ally me, seeing as they have cores on my land and I'm a little ticked off about that."

In the meantime, Leon saw that Japan had declared war on Oman. "What's that all about?"

"Oil, or future oil," Shining answered.

'Do ponies use oil for fuel?"

"Well, not for engines, not much, not yet. We haven't really caught up to you guys yet in every day technology. And, without any offense meant, we don't have to hurry, not when magic can serve quite well."

"But you guys have computers," Leon objected. "Modern technology. Otherwise, you couldn't play this game."

"Well, I didn't say we weren't upgrading whatsoever."

Shining's war with Oman didn't last long. The little Arab county, still un-westernized, was no match for the most military-minded nation of the East. In a few minutes, Oman changed from a blue-gray to pink.

Leon began to search for targets of aggression for himself. Haiti had recently had a revolution, which meant that it was no longer in the US' sphere of influence. There were no other unsphered targets in Latin or South America... well, except Uruguay and Paraguay, but both of the countries had revolutions so often that it was more trouble than it was worth to try sphering them, and they were too far away to get too quickly. With his mind made up, he began to justify a war of conquest on Haiti.

"Still hanging in there, Fluttershy?"

"Oh yes," the yellow pegasus replied contentedly. "I didn't get annexed, and I'm now protected by Shining, so I shouldn't have any more problems."

"Hopefully it stays that way. How are you able to stay afloat?"

"Well, I've had some immigrants come in unexpectedly, and I have just enough people for one factory. Its making about thirty seven pounds every day."

"You able to colonize at all?"

"Nope, the USA took everything nearby before I could start."

"Ah. Only thing I can colonize is Borneo," Leon said. "And, if I take Haiti, maybe a sliver of Africa as well. Pity, I'd like to go with more, but colonial range and all that."

"Just be glad you have a chance," Luna reminded him. "I'm probably not going to be able to colonize. Conquer, definitely, but not colonize. My research is dreadfully slow."

'That's what happens when 80% of your people are agrarian peasants who don't have time to learn how to read," Leon said.

"Oh, is that how it is in real life?"

"Yep."

"And... do they really have a one child only policy?"

"Yep again. It's not illegal to have more than one kid, but the government fines you for every kid you have after your first one. They tend to mind that policy more in the big cities, though. They relax it in the countryside; farmers need children to help work their farms, after all."

"Hmm, if I'd known that... well, how did they become a cornerstone of culture here in the Eastern world if that's true?"

"That culture tends to be concentrated in the cities, I think, and much of it has faded since... well, since Mao and the communists took over. They tried to kill off 'old culture' in the so-called 'Cultural Revolution,'" he snorted. "Cultural apocalypse is more like it."

"Please don't remind me," Luna said, making a discontented noise. "I've read a bit about it, and the little I know sickens me."

Leon loaded an army onto his transport fleet in preparation to take over Haiti. "Yeah. Well, luckily the communist party doesn't have the power it used to. In fact, if anything, its fading. Anyway, I think its high time that Haiti stopped giving people sphere trouble." With that, he declared war on Haiti and began his invasion.

Haiti had no defense. In a very short time, it was part of the world-domineering Texan empire.

"Well, that was easy," Leon said out loud.

"It was country constantly having revolutions," Luna noted. "What did you expect?"

"Yeah, but at least the US wasn't able to increase their relations fast enough to intervene."

"Well, there's that."

Leon watched as France and Germany continued to beat on each other. Of course, he could see practically nothing of what was going on, but the changes in city ownership could be tracked easily enough.

The NGF was definitely losing. He didn't know how or why; Germany (well, currently the North German Confederation) had a massive military focus that France rarely, if ever, rivaled, and that Russia never did. Nonetheless, the truth was there to see. For once, France was beating the German forces. He checked the warscore in the diplomacy tab. The NGF was losing, with 50 warscore in favor of the French. Russia has added a war goal of their own, demanding Ostprussen and Schlessen from them. And, given how much the war was in their favor, the two powerful allies would likely get what they wanted. The NGF had no allies that had joined the war with it, so no salvation would come from an friendly power on their own side.

It wasn't the only war currently being waged. Chile, having ripped its cores away from Bolivia and Peru in a previous war, had gone on the offensive against the latter, which had been joined by Bolivia again. However, Bolivia had been severely reduced; it was down to a single state, and when Leon checked, he saw that it had no brigades standing, even though it had mobilized. Not only that, but it had been completely occupied by Chile, which was now turning its attention to Peru and beating the stuffing out of it. In the Middle East, The Ottoman Empire was once more at war with Egypt; it had taken all its cores away from the uncivilized state, but now it was fighting to make the unstable sultanate a puppet. And Britain was busy annexing Orissa in India, which had thrown off their rule via a revolution.

These wars were abruptly joined by one featuring Japan and China vs. Russia. "What the...?"

"Hmm?"

"You guys just went to war with Russia."

"Well, they're already engaged in a life and death struggle with Germany," Shining reasoned, "so why not? It's not like they need their eastern provinces. As far as I've heard, there's nothing there but furs and wood."

"Maybe, but if its that worthless, why go after it?"

"Might as well. I don't have many other expansion choices."

"You could attack Spain."

"Yeah, I could," the white stallion said, in a voice that said he hadn't seriously considered it. "I got distracted by the big green blob to the north."

"Understandable, given how strong they are."

"Not so strong any more. They've got maybe eighty-eight brigades to stretch between us and the Germans, and not much of a navy; not enough to take seriously, anyway."

"Their only major ally is Austria- no, that's not true any more," Luna said. "They must have called them in, and Austria refused. They do have Bavaria and Siam, but they aren't powerful enough to worry about. In fact, I'll try to puppet Siam."

"Aren't they in the British sphere?"

"Yes, but they didn't join them. A pity for them."

Texas was getting quite powerful in the industrial field, Leon thought to himself as he checked the economy again. With California, New Mexico, Arizona, Sonora, Haiti and Brunei under his control, his existing factories had enough material to at least make more money than they were losing. His army was powerful as well, with over 120,000 men in 40 brigades in Texas proper, and 40 more brigades elsewhere in what otherwise would have been the southwestern United States. He had three more in Brunei and three more in Haiti, for a total of eighty-six in total, with four more brigades on the way, which, when they were complete, would bring the total up to ninety. He also had a small navy, split into two fleets of twenty steamer transports each. Not particularly strong compared to other great powers, but more than enough to maintain a hold on the existing empire and to conquer any small or uncivilized nations out there. Unfortunately, the colonization race in Africa was well under way, and he doubted that he would be able to join in on that any time soon.

Leon was pleased that he'd gotten this far in the game, but he wished he had been able to expand more into the western United States. Unfortunately, the strength of the USA was too great for him to take on in a war without taking bigger risks than he was comfortable taking. He had already taken a big bite out of Mexico, which had a strong dislike for him now.

Yeah, negative 200 relations, and presumably a lot of revanchism. Yeah, they'll want their stuff back, not that they'll get it.

Mexico was even weaker than he was now when it came to a military. They had only a handful of ships, and their army was down to thirty-five brigades. It was in the US's sphere, however, so attacking them was out of the question. That was a pity, but even so, Mexico was unlikely to do something stupid anytime soon.

What Mexico would have done was soon rendered irrelevant. They promptly fell into bankruptcy, and Britain took the opportunity to declare war on them within a few days of the fact. The USA joined, not wanting it's sphere messed with, while Britain was joined by Sweden and Austria, which it had allied with.

"Whoa, big war in North America," Leon muttered.

"You going to join the bash?" Eddy asked.

"Maybe, if the US starts losing. Until then, I'm just going to sit here."

"Fair enough. Oooooh, France just made Germany quit, and their terms weren't soft."

Leon checked out the terms. The North German Confederation had lost, badly; Russia had gained the territory she'd wanted, which included all pieces of German-held Poland. France had seized the province she'd wanted, and had enforced a humiliation on them as well. "Ooh," he said when he went to see for himself what the territorial changes had looked like. "Yeah, they got the bad end of the stick."

"Ow," Luna said when she looked as well. "That could have gone better for the Germans."

"Yeah, well, what the end of that war means that the Russians can concentrate what they have left against us."

"True, but they still don't have enough to stop us."

Luna's assessment was absolutely correct. Having spent their manpower fighting the NGF, Russia could not halt the Chinese and Japanese armies that were ripping through her. At best, she could only slow them down, and not very much at that.

"Kind of ironic," Eddy noted, "they gained stuff in the west, but they're gonna lose big time in the east."

"It's probably a good trade off, though," Luna said. "None of these Siberian states are likely to have any industry, and those in Germany probably will."

Leon kept a close eye on the war being waged on the American continent. Britain was gaining ground in Mexico, but they were losing land in Canada to the United States. He wasn't sure what course he should take; Britain was going to crush Mexico, but If they lost Canada, and the US added casus bellis on land there, they would gain warscore and starting winning big time. He didn't want the US getting even more powerful by seizing Canada. The US generally won wars against the British, given how the latter was spread out over the globe and how the US could concentrate their resources on one continent.

Hmm. I might not get a chance like this again. Might as well. I can try white peace-ing out of the war if it starts to go south. He began to justify a war to claim a state; specifically, he wanted Nevada-Utah. It wouldn't be much, but his current infamy level wouldn't let him take much in any case.

In other world news, Chile had won the war in South America; Bolivia was now a puppet, and Peru had lost a state. Chile wasn't, and probably wouldn't be, as powerful as Brazil, but it had more than enough to beat up Peru and Bolivia, the latter of which would be tied to Chile's wishes from now on. Columba had declared war on Venezuela and was busy beating them down while Britain was distracted fighting the United States. Brazil was fighting to annex Uruguay, and Ethiopia and Egypt were busy killing each other. Seeing as Egypt was getting crushed by the Ottomans, that was a war the Ethiopians were winning, and winning handily.

Leon watched as China and Japan - Luna and Shining - beat on Russia. China was doing most of the work, having greater strength than Japan at least quantity-wise. Russian armies would come in every so often, but it was clear that the Russians had a long way to go before they recovered from the war with the NGF; their armies came with their numbers drastically depleted, to the point where the Chinese, having the least number of military techs, had no trouble with them at all.

"This is easier than I thought it would be," the Lunar Princess remarked.

"Yeah," Shining replied. "This is almost too easy, and would be if Russia had a back-up plan or any allies to speak of."

"Indeed. Well, we know how far to trust the Austrians. After all, wasn't it one of their politicians who once said, 'We shall astonish the world at our ingratitude?'"

"It was," Leon confirmed. "The Russians had helped the Austrian monarchy in their time of need, but the Austrian Emperor didn't return the favor. I think they refused to help the Russian in the Crimean War against the French and British."

"Wow professor," Eddy said mockingly, "anything else you might want to tell us?"

"Oh, there would be plenty," Leon replied as his war justification finished. "But I have a war with the United States on my hands." He immediately declared war. and ordered his armies to invade Nevada-Utah.

"Whoa, are you sure that's a good idea?" Shining asked.

"Well, considering they're fighting their third war with Britain in their history, I think it makes sense."

"I guess. We're almost finished with Russia; we're at 64% warscore, so they'll be giving up pretty soon. I'll join your war if you call me in."

Leon did so, and Shining joined moments later.

"Hopefully, I can get my armies over there before the US has time to give you too much grief," the Guard stallion said.

"I'm not so sure I can do much, as my fleet is pathetic," Luna commented. "I might be able to land a couple stacks of twenty-one thousand at a time, but my full strength won't be getting into that fight any time soon."

The war started off well. The initial invasion was opposed only by twenty one-thousand soldiers; this force was set upon by two forces of thirty-thousand and sent retreating into the next state. A follow-up attack destroyed the enemy stack, and after that, most of Nevada- Utah was gobbled up with ease.

The three-way conflict was having an effect. Although Canada was being eaten by the US, Mexico was being swallowed by Britain, with most of its territory having been occupied. Leon offered the British military access, which they accepted. Furthermore, when Leon checked the war between the US and Britain, he saw that the US had been blockaded, and most of its navy had been wrecked. The British would be able to send more troops without being hindered.

Meanwhile, Russia was forced to make peace. Shining had taken the eastern-most pieces of Siberia, while Luna had taken Tomsk and another state just to her north, as well as enforcing humiliation on the Russians. Brazil had eaten Uruguay, removing it from the map entirely, and Columbia had left Venezuela with one tiny piece of land in northern South America. Egypt had lost both her wars and looked badly moth-eaten. The world was a very different place in 1874 than it had in 1836.

"Oh, bother," Luna said suddenly. "It's time to raise the moon. Sorry, but royal duties call. I have cut this session where it is."

"Oh man," Leon drawled. "I was just starting to have fun."

He would have bet Luna smiled before she continued, "Sadly, all good things must come to an end. Or at least that's what they say. Cheer up; we'll see each other again soon."

"I guess, but its still a let down to leave off here," Eddy mumbled.

""I'll be able to play Minecraft tomorrow," Fluttershy said. Leon practically jumped; he'd forgotten she was present, since she was silent most of the time. "And I'll be free to play Offworld Trading Company in a couple days."

"Thanks, Flutters."

"A good night to all of you, and may you all have the sweetest of dreams," Luna said as she saved the game. "Farewell, and as I said, we'll see each other again soon."

Leon got off the game, stretched, and went over to the bed to read. It had been an interesting session, to say the least. He was looking forward to another one.

Supreme Commander 2, Game 1; Nuclear winter

Supreme Commander 2, Game 1; Nuclear winter

"Hello, viewers, and welcome to another livestream with Princess Luna, Edward, Leon, and company," Luna said into her headset.

Leon gave a grunt in affirmation. "Hey."

"I'm world famous," Eddy said.

"Yeah, nice try," Rainbow replied, giggling.

"We're here playing Supreme Commander 2 for the first time on a livestream," Luna went on. "It may be a few years old, but seeing as there is no third game in the series yet, and as some viewers have asked specifically for it, we've decided to play this game for your enjoyment."

"Rule one," Leon said, "Infinite mass glitch is illegal. No one uses it under any circumstances."

"Aw nuts," Eddy muttered, then laughed. "Kidding. I hate that one."

"Actually, that's the only rule," Luna added, "other than not using any other glitches that are common."

"Yeah. The game's almost unplayable for people who either don't know how to use it or don't care, one way or the other, to use it," Leon said ruefully. "Not quite as bad as World at War, but not that far off. People go to play a game, they get swamped in the first few minutes by a massive army."

"Indeed. Now, lets get down to business. Players must choose who they'll be paired up with and what factions they'll be playing."

"I'm UEF," Leon said. "Dark blue."

"UEF as well," Rainbow said. "Light blue."

"Cybran," Eddy said. "Red."

"Illuminate, green," Luna said. "Twilight?"

"Illuminate, and I'll be purple."

"UEF," Shining Armor said, "and orange."

"I'm surprised," Leon said. "I thought you'd be Illuminate, having an interest in science, however small, yourself."

"I was thinking about it, but ultimately the UEF feels more... military."

"They're all military," Eddy pointed out.

"Yes, but UEF feels more like the disciplined kind of army that I'm used to."

"Most, if not all, units on the battlefield are robots," Leon pointed out. "In fact, I think that only your ACU has a living pilot."

"Still..." Shining paused, as if to clear his thoughts. "We've chosen our factions. Who's going to be on which team?"

"Me and Leo are together," Eddy said at once.

"I call Princess Luna," Rainbow said loudly.

"I guess I'll go with them," Twilight decided.

"And that leaves me to go with Leon and Edward," Shining said. "Hope you've got your game on today, little sister."

"You're on, BBBFF," the purple unicorn replied. Brother and sister giggled for a moment.

"That's settled," Luna confirmed. "Now, which style of gameplay shall we use? Supremacy or assassination?"

"Supremacy," Leon, Eddy, Shining, and Rainbow said, almost at once, while Twilight said, "Assassination."

"And finally, I'll choose a map... done. If everyone is ready...?"

Affirmative answers came back.

"Right, we'll start then."

Leon waited as the loading screen came up, which eventually gave way to a battlefield.

It was the Iskellian Coast map. Land and air units were definitely useful here, but the map had more water than usable land. Naval units were practically a given. Leon smiled. He loved naval battles in games, although he was fond of UEF land units too, in particular the Rockhead tank. He was the southern-most player, with Shining in the middle and Eddy to the north.

He set his engineers to build Mass Extractors nearby, and his ACU to build a naval factory. After these were finished, he constructed a couple generators to gather energy.

"Any ideas for our course of action?" Shining asked.

"I'll start harassing them with air," Eddy answered. "I'll build a bunch of fighter-bombers for that. I assume Leo is going to focus on building a fleet of battleships?"

"Yep," Leon answered. "Going for naval upgrades first, then structural. If I can, I'll build some long range artillery."

"Not a bad idea. I'll build some land units to attack and harass them," Shining offered.

"Good. Why aren't you trying to lead the team, seeing as you're a military officer? I thought you were currently engaged in a war with Changelings right now as well?"

"Actually, it didn't come to war."

"What?" Leon asked, interested, as his ACU was set to building a land factory. "How did you...?"

"Chrysalis saw that she was outnumbered right away. We'd have beaten her in open battle; they had a few modern firearms, but most of them carried spears and swords, and most of those were rusty. So she decided to negotiate. In exchange for their continued independence, and our allowing their harvesters to continue a peaceful means of gathering emotional energy, she agreed to sign a nonaggression pact between our nations. She also had to agree to pay for the damage her invasion caused and renounce war and aggressive actions as a means to gather energy."

"You forbade them to have an army?"

"What? No, no, no. She agreed simply not to use aggression to get what her hive needs. About a tenth of the reparations have already been paid, mostly by manner of having Changeling workers build in construction jobs. And no, they aren't slaves or unpaid servants, either; they get emotional energy to, er, eat, I guess the proper word for it is, and they get the same monetary wages from the boss on the site as a pony would... though what they'd do with money is beyond me."

"So, crisis averted?" Eddy asked.

"Crisis averted. It was close, though. She was quite resistant to our demands. She'd never expected her invasion to fail, nor for an army as well-equipped as ours was to come upon her doorstep, both of which were the game breakers in our favor. They still get to go through their own domestic affairs - again, I'm not sure just how their society is oriented. Our intelligence isn't clear on that, considering that we have no practical way for an agent to sneak in, as a disguised pony would be detected right away. They can't take energy from one another, or at least the normal drones can't, but they can take it from any civilized being, which allows them to keep infiltration of their home from happening."

"I see."

"As for the first question... It's true I'm a member of the Equestrian military, but there are other commanders out there better than me. And I'm not playing with members of the Royal Guard; I'm playing with you guys, civilians. And I'm not on duty at the moment, so..."

"Okay. Well, in any case, we really need to get cracking," Leon said. He ordered his engineers to build a couple research labs to speed up the rate he got research points. He wanted to research the Poseidon class battleship very quickly. His ACU he set to work building a second naval factory to speed up production.

Of course, there were problems with producing enough material. Mass gathered much, much more slowly than energy did, and mass extractors could only be constructed at certain points. Neither produced enough in the early game to satisfy him, but other sites outside the areas that players spawned were seriously at risk of enemy attack.

The next three minutes were further spent on developing his base and researching technologies.

Ed's base was made up of two air factories and the usual number of energy generators and mass extractors. Two anti-air towers stood at the edge of the northernmost factory. Shining had built three land factories, the typical number of mass extractors, and numerous energy generators. No one had a very big military yet. Ed had about five fighter-bombers flying around, and Shining had seven Rockheads and three Titan bots. Leon was in the process of building his first battleship, which came out a couple minutes later.

"Anyone going to build unit cannons?" Eddy asked.

"I'll definitely build one," Shining said. "Its good for launching raids, and that will help destabilize them."

"Maybe later," Leon answered. "I want to get my navy rolling first."

"And what do you consider "rolling" in this case?"

"Ten battleships at the very least."

"That'll take a while," Eddy answered, and unfortunately this was true. The problem wasn't the lack of facilities or technology, it was the fact that resources, mass in particular, didn't presently allow him to build more than one battleship at a time, as they were expensive.

On the other hand, they were very powerful. The ship he had constructed was already a good unit, great for bombarding bases and armies; other techs in the naval branch would give it even greater defensive and offensive capabilities.

"I sure hope the other side doesn't rush nukes," Leon muttered.

"I don't think that will happen," Shining reasoned. "Luna is livestreaming this; she'll want a conflict of at least moderate length for the pleasure of the viewers."

"Right. Well, there's always some way to do that that leaves us SOL."

"I hear that. Get the upgrade to your ACU that prevents it from going nuclear if it gets destroyed as soon as you can."

Yeah, I'll do that. I'm hoping it'll survive, though. They can become pretty useful."

"I'm going to try building the Proto-Brain as soon as possible," Eddy put in. "Research king coming through."

"Robot man coming through, you mean," Leon joked.

"Eh, save it. I'll be the most scientifically advanced player in the game."

"You realize that if you know that, they will too, right?"

"Yeah, but what can they do about it? I'll be too busy bombing their base."

"They'll have built shields by then."

"Not enough. Not enough."

Leon decided to let it go at that. But another concern gripped him. "And what if they decide to nuke us before we're ready?"

"Oh, I wouldn't want to try that if I were them," Eddy said with amusement.

'Going to nuke them back?"

"Well, in a way. You'll see."

Leon watch as two more battleships came off the assembly line. He sighed at the thought of the mass they'd cost to build, but they were worth it. He'd gotten the tech that gave them an extra row of guns, and soon he'd research the anti-missile upgrade as well. He also went and built five Mastodon cruisers, which, though poor at long range bombardment, were better at killing air units.

By now, all three of them had built up a decent proto-military; Leon with his navy, Shining with his army, and Eddy with about twenty fighter bombers. Leon's biggest worry was that someone on the other team - Twilight, mostly - would discover their intentions and counter them. He had no doubt that the purple unicorn had built a ton of research centers already, and as the Illuminate didn't have to worry about naval technologies, she'd have better air or land technology than him and Shining already.

Of course, the Cybran Proto-Brain gave them twenty points of research per second without having to excessively build research centers. Eddy would probably be able to keep up with her.

Eddy began his raid a couple minutes later. "Tally ho, chaps!" he said as he sent his force on its way.

By now, his base consisted of three air factories and a land factory, as well was a number of research stations. Shining's base was just the opposite; three land factories and one for air, as well as a single sea factory. Leon had three naval factories an a couple land ones.

"I'll start my ground raid," Shining said.

"Hold up, my battleships will support you," Leon said.

"Fine," Ed grumbled. "But your units are too slow."

Apparently, Leon wasn't the only one to think Twilight the biggest threat. Eddy concentrated his fire on two of her research stations and quickly destroyed them. He took anti-air fire from the ground, but not enough to induce him to stop his attack.

Shining's attack took longer to arrive. But his own assault met with success. His army of twenty tanks, about the same number of assault bots, and artillery quickly wrecked a shield generator and then destroyed a land factory. Some purple units attack them as they did so - Leon noted that they already had shields. But these weren't enough to halt the attack. Shining's army suffered a beating, but in the end the enemy force was obliterated. A moment later, Leon's ships began blasting away at one of Luna's research stations, largely as a distraction, though he wasn't against killing an enemy's ability to research.

The response came quickly. Luna didn't have many research stations up, but she had units. She had a wing of fighter-bombers, which attacked the bombarding battleships. Leon's cruisers shot down several, but not before one of his ships was down to red health and two others were in the yellow.

While the battle between sea and air units was ongoing, two of Luna's research stations and an air factory had been destroyed, along with a mass extractor. A luckless engineer that had tried to fix the latter had been squashed like a bug by the shells sent downrange.

The attackers were suffering significant losses, though. In spite of the damage that had been done, the surviving factories pumped out enough cheap units to halt the land and ground attacks. Leon lost two of his battle ships and three cruisers before he decided that it was best to withdraw. "I'm pulling back," he stated.

"Yeah, I'm down to eight planes," Eddy agreed.

"I'm down to three tanks and two bots. I think retreat would be best."

All three of them withdrew. They'd left a decent amount of destruction in their wake; The enemy's unit production would be lower, and during the raid, when all three attacking players had been focused on the battle, they found that their mass and energy had been allowed to stockpile, giving them decent resources with which to build their bases and armies. However, the downside was that their own armies had been battered in the fighting. The surviving units had gotten some veterancy, which made them stronger, but the destroyed units would have to be replaced.

Leon set to work building three more battle ships and four more cruisers. He also upgraded his factories, so that they had shields, anti-air defenses, radar, and missiles, as well as constructing a number of shield generators, as well as heavy anti-air and ground defenses.

Leon finished most of his naval research and began to work on his buildings. In particular, he wanted to get heavy artillery in order to bombard the enemy bases with without having to close with an army. Of course, shields in sufficient number could block this sort of attack, but it would be an annoyance for the enemy, and the mass and energy necessary to build shield generators were resources that could not be used to build factories or units... or anything else useful.

All three of them began focusing on building more turrets to counter enemy attacks. Personally, Leon didn't want to suffer the sort of attack they'd just subjected their enemy to.

But, except for a few skirmishes between small groups of units sent to reconnoiter, the attack didn't come the way they'd expected it to. "Strategic launch detected."

"Oh great, here we go," Leon muttered. "Nuke fest."

Leon zoomed out. The missile had been launched from Rainbow's base, and was heading right for Shining's base. He watched the radiation symbol that indicated a nuclear missile make its way diagonally across the map.

It came closer and closer...

And suddenly, it changed direction.

"What the..."

Eddy began laughing.

"...You got the DLC pack, didn't you?" Shining asked.

'Yep."

"And that's why you kept having engineers build near my base," Leon noted.

"Yep. Nuke redirectors."

"What the hay!?!" Rainbow said loudly as the missile streaked toward her own base.

"I warned you that might happen," Twilight said in an annoyed sort of way, and the pegasus could easily imagine her rolling her eyes.

The missile came right down on top of the silo she'd launched it from - where she had two more queued up - and vaporized it, along with a go third of her base.

"Oh for... Rrrrrrrr!"

"I suppose this makes our future plans of attack more simple," Luna observed. "We'll hit them the usual way; with units and artillery."

"Illuminate launchers won't reach them," Twilight noted solemnly.

"Yes, but they will prevent the other side from setting up buildings too close to us. In the meantime, I think we should each build anti-nukes, to prevent them from trying the same trick on us."

"Agreed," Twilight replied, as Rainbow stared at the ruins of a good-sized portion of her base.

"Well, that escalated quickly," Leon noted as the missile blew up part of Rainbow's base.

"Yep. But I don't think they'll just sit there and let us nuke them back," Shining said, thinking out loud. "They'll build anti-nukes just as fast as they can research and build them."

"And that will take up a lot of their resources," Leon noted. "On the other hand, maybe they'll position more nukes in remote locations and attempt to bomb us from there. If I read the wiki right, those nuke redirectors can be overwhelmed."

"Sadly true," Eddy said. "Had that happen in my last game. The other guy lost five of his launchers, but three more got through and wrecked me."

"Better be careful, then. But still, there's only so much land on this map."

"Yeah."

Leon built more battleships, bringing his total up to eleven, along with twenty cruisers. He also had a small land army, but he'd mainly dealt with the threat of land and air attacks by building numerous shield generators, as well as dozens of common turrets and a few small artillery turrets. At sea, he was determined to be unbeatable.

He started work on an Atlantis II Experimental Carrier, a submersible with great attack power against land and sea units and buildings, though it had no anti-air capabilities. It could produce air units as well, making it a mobile factory. He hoped to build a couple of these, though he intended for battleships to be his main force, as the Atlantis had less than half the range a battleship did.

"Any progress on your prison?" Leon asked in conversational tones as he continued to build up.

"On Prison Architect? Oh yeah," Eddy answered. "Probably not the kind I wanted. I had to reload and start part of it over again."

"What happened?" Shining asked.

"Well, we - that is to say, I - received this legendary prisoner, Kevin something or other, the kind of guy that breaks down his cell door every morning, kills five guards for a work out, survives being shot and does it all over again the next day. You know who I mean?"

"Yeah..."

"I had so much trouble with him that I decided to get rid of him. Problem was, he was taking shotgun rounds as if they were only tasers; the bloke would only get wounded. So I asked myself, what could I do to get him out of the way? And I decided to set up a metal detector next to the showers and remove one of the drains while he was there."

"Uh oh," Leon murmured.

"Oh indeed. Got rid of him, alright, but ended up electrocuting about twenty five other prisoners to death with him, as well as the workman who took out the drain. I got removed from power and thrown in my own prison."

"You deserved it," Shining quipped.

"Maybe. What would you have done?"

"Chain and ball, all four limbs. Have armed guards bring him food and whatever medicine he needed. If he tries to attack, stun him and knock him unconscious."

"Yeah, the problem being this is one of those guys who regularly break down steel doors, smash walls, and set their own cell on fire. Also, chaining someone up isn't possible in the current alpha... yet."

"As a pony who values law and order, I can't say I approve of your way of dealing with the situation."

"Oh come on, you guys deal with crooks every day, how can you take their side?"

"I'm not, not in the sense that I approve of their actions either, at least not those that got them sent to prison. But electrocuting half your prison to death just to get rid of one guy is just excessive, especially seeing how twenty six people who were innocent in the matter died."

"All but one of them were convicted felons."

"And how much trouble did you get from them? Or from that member of your staff?"

"...The guy got what he deserved."

"And so did you, apparently. And you don't have to deal with magic when your prisoners try to escape."

Leon saw a shell come toward his base from up north. Rainbow had recovered enough to set up a long range artillery building, which was slowly but steadily pumping out shells. The rounds didn't get through the many shields the southern team had over their bases, but you didn't need to use mass and energy to fire one of those big guns. If you got twenty of them together, they could do some damage, which, considering the weight of the barrage, would be difficult to repair. They weren't as destructive - or accurate - as nukes, but a shell couldn't be redirected, only blocked. And enough artillery could get through any shield.

Of course, Rainbow was the only one with artillery that was really dangerous. Twilight and Luna were playing as the Illuminate, who had no real long range weapons. Their missile launcher - which Leon liked to refer to as a SCUD, seeing as it fired energy missiles rather than shells - had short range. The Illuminate also had no navy, though their land units could hover over the ocean. While this allowed them to concentrate research and production on land and sea units, it kept them from striking back in any meaningful way until they got right on top of their enemy. Illuminate units - including their ACU - could teleport, and that was definitely annoying to have to deal with.

The only Illuminate Experimental Leon usually had any respect - and fear - for was the Loyalty Gun, which reprogramed opposing land and naval buildings and units to join the side that had made the gun. Luckily, this was a building that couldn't move, but the speed with which the gun could convert opposing units was devastating. Leon had encountered players who used the Loyalty Gun offensively, building it close enough to their enemies' bases so it could reprogram turrets to shoot the very side that had made them, unhinging a defense and turning the game upside down. No doubt Twilight would have some idea of how to use such a weapon. He hoped his battleships would see - and, more to the point, blast - any attempt to utilize the building in such an offensive manner.

Well, anyway, two can play that game. He began building heavy artillery of his own, as well as building more research stations. He also built more shield generators, and got the techs that gave some, though not all, his normal buildings turrets of their own.

Leon wasn't the only one on his team to build heavy artillery. Eddy built some of his own, and after a few minutes, both sides were hammering each other, though the southern team definitely had an edge.

"Anyone going to build land Experimentals?" Ed asked.

'I will," Shining said. "Actually, I've already got a couple of Fatboys."

"Excellent. I'll build some Soul Rippers to go with that."

Leon looked at the enemy base. He could see the buildings that had been there during the raid, but large numbers of unidentified signatures - some in motion - were unknown. He could only guess what they were. Of course, their team had radar, as well as sonar, but those only revealed the existence of buildings and units, not their identity.

"Got a fleet of ships moving in from the north," Eddy announced suddenly.

"Ships, or Illluminate units?"

"Ships, I think. Signatures are too far apart to be tanks and anti-air."

"Rainbow built her own navy, then," Shining deduced. "And of course she built it on the other side."

"Not to worry; she's not the only one who can build ships."

A small Cybran fleet engaged the hostile UEF fleet. While it wasn't enough to halt the enemy advance, it did well enough to hold them up until Ed's fleet of fighter bombers began their attack. Several of Rainbow's ships went to the bottom.

"Uh oh," Leon said, looking at the new radar signatures coming from the north. "Definitely Illuminate units."

"Yeah. Little do they know, I've got LEGS."

With that, Eddy's battleships and destroyers - those that had survived the engagement - went straight for land. Once there, three pairs of legs on each ship unfolded, allowing them to scramble up from the sea and onto the land, still firing their guns.

"Nice to have a navy that can do that," Leon observed. "I think we left them alone too long, though."

"Indeed. I'll build a few Krakens and some more of... well, some more of everything. And nukes, too, can't forget them."

"I'll be building some, too," Leon answered.

'They'll be sure to have built anti-nukes by now," Shining warned.

"But those defenses can be overrun," Leon argued. "And because none of them are Cybran, they can't redirect nukes. The worst that happens is that we waste mass and energy for no results, and our bases remain intact. At best, we kill them their entire team off."

"Sounds... extreme."

"It's not like we're electrocuting prisoners," Leon pointed out. "And Rainbow tried to do us in not long before."

"I guess it makes sense. But they'll shoot down quite a few of them."

"We'll try and take their attention off the nukes, then," Leon offered. "We'll fight them conventionally, take out their anti-nukes now and then, and wreck their factories."

"If they don't do the same to us."

The battle in the north continued. Although the individual Illuminate tanks were no match for battleships, and had a short range to boot, there were a lot of them. Shining's army - including his Fatboys - moved up to engage them. Both Twilight and Luna were pouring in their armies. Every time a unit was destroyed, another came up to take its place. Here and there, groups of units teleported around the battlefield. Rainbow's remaining ships pitched in as well.

For whatever reason, they hadn't attempted to attack Leon. Some of his ships were close enough to bombard the enemy, but even so, they couldn't exactly walk on land like Cybran ships could. Leon looked at the map, wondering whether an attack on the enemy bases was a good move, or whether it would leave his own base and those of his allies open to attack.

That question was answered quickly. A large land army began moving in. It had to be Rainbow's ground forces. They were backed up by a considerable number of air units, most of which were fighters, though some bombers and gunships had been tossed in as well. She was going to try to attack while the others were engaged.

"Strategic launch detected."

Leon watched as another nuke - this one coming from Twilight's base - rose and started making its way southward... toward his fleet.

"That's not going to happen," he said firmly, and gave orders for his fleet to move.

The nuke did come down... but not on top of his fleet directly. The nuke did vaporize a few ships, the ones either too slow or too blocked by other warships to escape in time, but the vast majority escaped in time.

The enemy land army approached the southern bases. It was of a fairly decent size, and it also had Experimentals of its own; several Illuminate Urchinow Assault Blocks and a couple Fatboys.

He set his ships to fire at once, but several of them were out of range and needed to maneuver back into position.

So that was her plan... force my ships to move, so they'd be out of range when they made their main attack.

However, the enemy force - except for the Assault Blocks - was coming directly south, toward his own base. Either the other side perceived his weakness on land or thought he wasn't willing to fire near his own buildings.

"Yeah... problem with that thinking is..." He went over to a nuke silo he'd constructed, clicked on it, targeted the area where the enemy force was about to go, and hit the button.

"Strategic launch detected."

A nuke rose up out of the silo, flew a relatively short distance, and dropped right on top of the enemy force. The explosion instantly killed most of the units that had been approaching - including both the enemy Fatboys and an Assault Block - as well as several of Leon's own buildings and one of the redirectors Eddy had built for him.

"I'm not going to lose just because a couple of my own buildings get in the way. Hope that sends a message."

Twilight stared at the nuclear explosion that had just claimed most of Rainbow's army. "Did he seriously use a nuke to stop us? Even with his own buildings at risk?"

"Yeah," Rainbow said, sounding surprised.

"But he did succeed in stopping our offensive," Luna put in. "Which makes it an effective tactic. He's already rebuilding, and I think I spied an energy converter, so he'll have plenty of mass to rebuild with."

"And now my Assault Blocks are getting blown to bits by naval firepower," Twilight sighed. "I'm probably going to lose the rest of them."

"I think we should withdraw for now," the Princess advised, "before we lose the rest of our armies... and before either Edward or Shining Armor get the same idea Leon did."

"Or before Leon just takes it upon himself to blow us up himself," Rainbow muttered.

The last Assault Block exploded under the rain of shells. At the same time, what remained of the enemy army began to fall back.

"We got 'em!" Eddy shouted triumphantly.

"For now," Shining said. "I think we owe our survival partly to Leon. Although you might want to check before blasting half your own base into oblivion next time."

"It wasn't anywhere near half, and I'm not letting them just do what they want just because they're near my base," Leon responded.

Leon went on, rebuilding his navy and building up a moderately-sized land force, as well as rebuilding the stuff he'd wrecked with his own nuke. His army would be tough, but not invincible.

"Going to town and building a ton of nukes," Eddy announced. "Leo, I assume you have some?"

"Yeah. About five. I'm not launching until I have like twenty or more. Preferably more."

"That'd take forever," Shining noted.

"It's the easiest way to crush tem. Besides, if their base is resistant to an attack by our armies, it might not be such a bad idea. I've played the campaign and a number of multiplayer battles. If you get enough shields up, the base become practically invulnerable, even with Experimentals attacking it. What I'm worried about is Twilight, Luna, and their ability to build Loyalty Guns."

"Ooooooooh, right. Yeah, I'd forgotten about that. I hate those things."

"Don't we all. You do have that unit cannon up, right?"

"Oh yeah. It's at the back of the base. I'm just not sure where to fire it, or whether to build more, so I can land an army instead of a platoon."

"Another reason to delay our main attack. I guess you could launch small numbers of units to attack them at certain points. That might reveal whether they have a Loyalty gun or not."

"They'd know I've got a unit cannons once I started doing that, though. I want it to be a surprise."

"I've got a idea on how to go about that. Go ahead and build a few more of them. I think we can give them a surprise."

Leon continued to build. His navy soon grew to thirty battleships and sixty cruisers. He also built twenty submarines, to counter any underwater threat the enemy might have established. He had researched the entire naval tree, most of the structural tree, and was now working on land.

"Could send our ACUs up there," Eddy suggested. "They can't be converted."

"Nah, we'd lose them," Shining objected.

"In the middle of the enemy base, which is kind of the point."

"Not the best idea ever," Leon said. "Your ACU provides a lot of energy, and a little mass too, if I remember right. You'd lose those advantages if the ACU blew up."

"Not if I ejected from it first."

"Big problem with that line of thinking, though," Leon replied. "First, you'd have to eject before the ACU blew up, which means wither launching too early - and the enemy would see what you're doing stop shooting the ACU - or you'd leave it too late and the pod would get vaporized when your ACU went nuclear. And the enemy would try to target the escape pod in any case."

"I guess it would be difficult to eject at just the right moment. Still want to try it, though, if we find ourselves with no other choice."

The team continued to build. Eddy's air force grew massively. Shining built three more unit cannons, and built units inside them, ready for launch. Leon expanded his navy to fifty battleships and eighty cruiser, as well as a hundred land units and Experimental Fatboys; a King Kriptor he'd built towered over everything.

"You think we're ready?" Leon asked.

"I'm not sure," Eddy answered. "Maybe a few more nukes..."

"I think we might be able to go in without them," Shining replied. "But I'd better check real fast whether or not they have Loyalty Guns."

The stallion's units began launching, each unit cannon firing toward a different part of the enemy base. The began firing as soon as they hit the ground. Almost immediately, some of them were hit by white beams.

"Yep, just as we figured," Ed said tonelessly.

"And those things outrange my ships," Leon muttered. "Figures."

"And our artillery fire is doing jack all against their shields," the Briton went on. "That leaves us with few options. I mean, I could use my air units, but they'd take a long time to get through those shields, and Twilight's not stupid. She's likely built anti-air guns everywhere. Scratch that; they probably all have turrets everywhere. My air force is going to get wiped without leaving a dent."

"I hate fighting Illuminate," Leon groaned. "All because of that stupid conversion ray. It's overpowered."

"Which means that nukes are our best option of doing anything."

"Guess it can't hurt to try," Shining replied.

"How about this; we all select our launchers at the same time, fire at the same time, and each of us blows something off the face of the earth. Not every anti-nuke will hit something; I think I've seen them miss when you use them in the campaign."

"Right," Leon said, selecting all his nuke launchers. "Key turned, hand on the button-" here he put his cursor over the enemy base, near where one of the Loyalty Guns was supposed to be - "ready to launch."

"Three, two, one..."

Leon clicked.

A row of nukes arose from the launchers, rising up in the sky.

'"Oh wow, Leo, did you serious set up yours to spell 'LOL'?"

"Yep. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you... the LOL nuke." Leon watched the nukes fly through the sky, in rough formation of an L, then an O, then a second and final L. "I can't wait to see what this looks like in the livestream."

"Yeah, mine are just a giant, yellow and black ball. Might as well launch our next waves."

Leon kept clicking on parts of the enemy base until he had no more nukes left - and he'd built a lot, as had Eddy and Shining.

"Counterstrike incoming," Shining warned. "Enemy nukes coming our way."

And indeed, a several waves of nuclear missiles was headed for their base. Some would doubtless be thrown back by the nuke redirectors. Others would definitely find targets.

"Good thing our armies are on their way already, or we might not have much left," Leon noted.

"Probably won't have much left, but it doesn't matter much if they don't have anything left at all."

Since Leon agreed with that, he didn't reply. Their first wave of nukes were above their targets. Almost all were hit by anti-nukes and destroyed. Only two that he saw actually detonated. Those two still did massive damage, though. One of the Loyalty Guns, and the shields that had been built all around it, had been obliterated, as had the anti-nuke launchers that had protected it and any remaining missiles those silos had held. The second wave - with far less resistance than the first - struck. Leon watched as large portions of the enemy bases went up in mushroom clouds. Succeeding waves of missiles began to close in.

He winced, though, as he went back to his own base. The enemy nukes had obliterated most of his factories, almost his entire mass production, and much of his energy. Shining and Eddy had fared no better. Flashes of light and corresponding mushroom clouds went up, one after another. Leon quickly had his ACU hunker in order to protect it from the assault.

Their own nukes, however, had ripped the enemy base apart, killed off the majority of their units, and damaged their ACUs. Best of all, the Loyalty Guns were now nothing more than smoldering pieces of slagged metal.

"Go, go, go, go, go!" Eddy urged.

Leon didn't have to be told twice. As their fourth and fifth wave of nukes hit, his battleships closed in, pounding away at the small number of isolated installations that were left. Eddy's air force closed in on Twiight's ACU, and Shining's land army was closing in for the kill.

With a roar and yet another flash of light, Rainbow's ACU exploded, destroying the small number of units she'd had clustered around and above it, along with Eddy's fighter bombers and gunships that had inflicted the fatal damage. Twilight's fell over as it died, but the commander's pod rose into the sky in an effort to escape. Fighter bombers quickly downed it before it could get anywhere. Luna, apparently deciding that enough was enough, walked her ACU into the middle of Shining's Army, where it blew up as well, destroying the majority of the force that had been attacking it. Enemy nukes that had been redirected began to fall in the middle of the base, further weakening the attackers but also wiping out some of the few buildings that had survived the bombardment.

The game ended moments later as Leon went back to the allied bases. The other side hadn't left much; just about everything, other than a collective handful of buildings, was destroyed. Only ruined husks and burned out engineers marked where working bases had been, along with severely damaged ACUs.

"That was fun," Eddy said quietly.

"If this was a real planet, I think it'd be safe to say that it would be uninhabitable now," Leon answered. "What was that, a hundred nukes going off? I think the game almost crashed a couple times."

"I'm glad it wasn't a real planet. I don't think I could be so nuke happy otherwise," Shining said. "I'm glad we won, though."

"Just got an invitation to join Luna and the others," Eddy said. "I'm going to see what they have to say about it."

"Probably nothing good," Leon murmured, but answered the invitation when it came.

"Did you really have to use so many nuclear missiles to destroy our base?" Twilight asked as soon as they had arrived. "The first two waves would have been enough."

"Like you didn't try to use overkill on us."

"That was to overcome Edward's nuke redirectors!"

"What are you complaining about?" Leon asked. "You had Loyalty Guns set up, never mind superfluous shields to protect from air attack, which is their only weakness."

"Yeah... but..."

"Admit it, little sis, we got you good," Shining said with amusement.

Twilight didn't respond for a moment. Then, finally, she gave a small giggle. "I guess you did, BBBFF."

"I have to admit, it was kind of cool to get nuked by missiles spelling out LOL," Rainbow said. "I still don't like that you beat us, though."

Everyone chuckled at that. It had been a great game, and they were all looking forward to more in the future.

Crusader Kings 2, game 1 (part 2); Restart

"I suppose having all the lords of England rise up at once and utterly crush your dynasty out of existence inspires a need to restart," Eddy murmured as Crusader Kings 2 started.

"Yeah," Leon agreed. "For my part, I'm not the invincible king of France I thought I was."

"At least there will be more in the game this time," Luna put in. "Sorry that happened, but you really need to keep your anger in check. Executing people without cause is grounds for being dethroned, having your titles revoked, and then being killed yourself, as happened."

"I managed to catch and execute three of the rebelling dukes before I went down."

"But that didn't change the result. You were defeated, had the kingship taken, and then, when you escaped and launched a faction revolt - without an heir - the one who took over as king killed you, incurring some small tyranny himself, but making you lose the game."

"Oh well. Fresh start. Who are you going to be, Leon?"

"Venice. More money, more mercs."

"Yeah, but you're not going to be in charge all the time."

"What do I care? And if you get enough trade posts and build enough cities, you can take in so much money that your dynasty can be perpetual rulers anyway."

"I guess. Me, I'm going to go for Scotland this time. We're doing the 700's start this time, right?"

"Yes," Luna answered. "More challenge, especially for non-pagans."

"Who else is joining?"

"Shining Armor and Rainbow Dash."

"Any special rules you want everyone to follow?" Eddy asked.

"Hmm. What rules would you put in yourselves?"

"Everyone else had to be my vassal," Ed answered.

"Unacceptable. You knew I wouldn't accept that."

"It was a nice try, though.

"What about ruler ranks?" Leon asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, shouldn't we be prohibited from being the Byzantine Emperor or something? Because that would be kind of easy."

"Oh, indeed. I'll think about it, but you're right."

"Sorry I'm late," Shining said, joining them. "What did I miss?"

"Nothing all that important. We were discussing how this restart should be set up."

"Right, who's here and when do we begin?" Rainbow asked, coming onto the channel.

"That's everyone," Luna said. "Good."

"Any rules?" Shining asked.

"We were just discussing a few. I might forbid anyone to start with an Empire-rank title, for instance, on the basis that's that would just be giving them victory on a platter."

"Yep," Rainbow said.

"Leon and Edward had their own... rules," Luna said carefully. "But enough. We need to select, or create, characters."

"I say we each make our own, as a rule," Rainbow suggested.

"Not a bad notion, but it will take some time."

The pegasus thought about it, then replied, "I can handle it."

"Good. Everyone select a character to redesign. Anyone king on downwards is acceptable."

Leon selected the Venetian Doge and began remodeling him.

"Name; Luigi. Dynasty... Di Lecce. Culture; Italian. Religion; Catholic."

It took a bit longer to redesign the dynasty flag, but in the end he set up something with a green stripe down the left side, a white down the middle, and a red one on the right.

"Italy before Italians," he whispered to himself. And it was partly true; the Kingdom of Italy started out as the Kingdom of Lombardy, with the dominant culture being the Lombards. But not entirely, for Italian culture did exist, most eminently in Venice itself.

Leon chose Midas Touched for his education, then selected a number of traits. Negative ones took years away from his character's age, while positive ones added on. He took Wounded, Deceitful, Lisp, Legitimized Bastard, and Harelip. In exchange, he put in Kind, Just, and Temperate.

"Married; yes. Sons; one."

He sighed as he finished and waited for the others to be done as well.

"Done," Luna said. "Ruler of West Francia."

"Me too," Eddy said. "King of Pictland, warrior extraordinaire."

"Count of Gotland," Rainbow replied.

"Khan of Magyar," Shining answered.

"Me too," Leon said. "Doge Luigi, of Venice."

"I'd say we're all ready to start. I'd like to add a couple more rules before we start though."

"Yes?"

"One; no scheming to kill anyone that isn't an adult."

"Yeah, okay," Leon said, nodding."

"Two; no executing another player's character if you capture them."

"Aw, blast," Eddy mumbled.

"Three; no taking another player's last holding on the map. You can reduce them to the rank of count, but that's all."

Rainbow's hooves clunked together loudly. "Okay, but then I get to force them to be my vassal."

"That is allowed. Four; using cheats is absolutely forbidden, and anyone caught using them will be banned from Minecraft for a week and be kicked out of our group for the same amount of time."

"Why would you need to add that, anyway?" Leon asked. "Like we'd actually cheat."

"I'm just throwing it out there, in case anyone is tempted. And five; if by some reason you become part of the Byzantine Empire you will not blind or otherwise harm prisoners in your care, with the exception of execution."

"Can we execute adventurers?" Leon asked.

"Yes, though that counts as tyrannical."

"Yeah, I have a hard time liking them, them and people who declare invasions on you. I got reduced from hard-won king of Ireland to count of Ulster because of the fricking king of Norway; I don't know why you can't just execute them without incurring tyranny, the way you can with rebels."

"I see. Well, those are the rules."

"Oh, if any of us are Germanic, can we be forbidden to raid certain groups?" Leon asked.

"No. That's not going to be a rule."

"Man..."

"In any case, I think we should start. Are we all ready?"

"Yep."

"Uh huh."

"Right on!"

"Ready."

"Starting..." A blue bar began to fill at the top of the screen; presently, Leon found himself staring down at the lone province of Venice, a Duchy-rank territory.

"I'll keep the game paused for a few minutes to let you all get comfortable, choose your council members, and all that," Luna said.

Leon sorted out his Cabinet and set the various characters to work. He selected his son as his designated heir. He tried to be careful. As it was, his current character, in his forties, could probably be expected to last twenty more years; he wasn't sure why but while tribal - and some feudal - lords didn't seem to last long past fifty, republican leaders tended to live much longer. He wasn't sure if that was something to do with the game or whether it was just him, but he liked it.

"I'm starting the game up now," Luna said. "Triple speed, in three... two... one... and we're on."

Leon set his Chancellor to get a claim in Segna, a province in Slavic Croatia. He wasn't thrilled with having to pay for a claim, but he couldn't stay a one province minor forever. He intended to get he Duchy of Croatia for himself and elevate his Duchy-rank Republic up to King level. His Court Chaplain was in Rome to improve relations with the Pope.

"Raiding people in this game is a lot of fun," Eddy said. "I'm landing in Orkney, and the bloke there's already like, 'You've raided my lands, I hate you!' Nothing you can do about it, though, ha ha!"

"You can raid as a Christian character?" Luna asked, sounding puzzled.

"You can, as a tribal character," Leon explained. "Tribal and nomadic governments can raid neighbors, though they can't raid people further away, with the exception of the Vikings. Feudal governments, Iqtas, and Merchant Republics cannot raid, with the same exception as before."

"Oh. So all those lords in Ireland..."

"Yep. They can raid their neighbors, and basically raise enmity with each other. So far, I've almost never seen Ireland formed by the Irish; it's usually someone else, like the king of England or Scotland, that actually create that title."

"Probably because they don't get Primogeniture," Luna noted. "It takes awhile before they can get the technology for it, and as they start out as counts anyway, with the exception of maybe one, they can't usually get it."

'Yeah, that sets them back. Oh, hold on, this random courtier is trying to kill my wife." Leon hit the option to jail the aforementioned courtier. "There," he said, as prison bars overlaid the offending character's picture. "That gets you out of the picture."

"Speaking of Primogeniture, most people don't get it even when they have the technology," Shining put in. "I've seen kings lose a second king title when they died because they didn't change the succession laws."

"I saw the King of Hungary lose Poland because of that the other day," Leon agreed. "I think the main problem is in getting all your vassals to have a positive opinion about you. There's too many wars to lower tribal organization and crown authority for everyone to like a ruler easily."

"Heh, tell me about it."

"So, what's your plan, Leo?" Ed asked.

"Upgrade my family palace up to level four," Leon replied. "More tax, and more levies. Then I'll upgrade hidden passageways up to max too. And maybe swipe stuff from Croatia."

"Just don't try to claim any of my stuff," Shining warned.

"Why would you think I'd do that?" Leon asked innocently. "Just stay out of Croatia and Carinthia and we'll be fine."

He heard a faint chuckle in response. "The duchy or the kingdom?"

"Both."

"I'm going to go to war for a claim myself," Luna said. "A claim for Middle Francia."

"Oh good. Time for House Karling to go down. I get sick of having them constantly infighting," Eddy said. "Even when the West Francian King wins the war with his brother, he loses the second title because he can't get Primogeniture."

"Even Ultimogeniture is better, and you can get that right off the bat," Leon agreed. "If everyone likes you enough."

"I've never heard of a real life situation where the youngest person was always the heir to the throne."

"Neither have I, though it might have happened here and there. My knowledge of history doesn't cover that topic."

"Wow, Mr. History Man actually admits he doesn't know everything."

"Don't push it. I could plan to kill your character."

"As if."

"Oh really?' Leon said, clicking on Ed's character and initiating a plan to kill him, auto allowing planners to join the scheme. "Just don't get too big for your britches."

"They don't wear britches up here. We wear kilts instead. That's why we're technologically superior to you Italians. But have it your way."

"Hmph."

"Ugh, how am I supposed to get any money from raiding when this big army comes to fight me?" Rainbow asked in frustration. "Every time I go to raid Germany, they always have some army form in a few days to kill me."

"You could raid other Vikings."

"Wait a minute, you can really do that?"

"Yeah. Be careful, because they have their own armies. But I'd advise upgrading your current holding first."

"That'll take awhile."

"You can use prestige for some upgrades instead of money," Ed pointed out.

"Oh, right. And you get prestige from raiding. Okay, thanks for the tip, Ed."

"Doing my job."

"After that, try launching an invasion against a Lithuanian duchy," Leon suggested. "Like me, you need to expand soon."

"Thanks. Why Lithuania, though?"

"It's close. Easier to reinforce quickly than in some county in Ireland. Or you could wait until one of them forms a kingdom, and invade that."

"Okay. That won't help me form Scandinavia, though, not directly. I'd rather invade somebody in Sweden or Norway."

"You could, but right now, they're a lot stronger than you are."

"Good point, I guess."

Leon watched as the days in the game passed. He got some increased relations with the Pope, as well as a tithe from his Steward, with which he started building a trading post in Venezia.

"Do we have Sunset Invasion going?" Ed asked.

"Yes; we all had to have the same DLC," Luna replied. "Be prepared in the long run."

"Really long run, when it's 773."

"Then you should have plenty of time to get prepared."

"Aztecs will be absolutely brutal when they come," Leon said. "Never mind their armies; it's the disease that's to be afraid of. I've read it takes your health down by 8.50."

"What?! Are you serious?"

"Yep."

"So I survive pneumonia and tuberculosis only to die from a fictional disease."

"Yeah, that's about it."

"But that's only if they win and get a territory, right?"

"No, I think the disease begins soon after the invasion. How long it spreads and how much damage it does, I'm not sure, and I haven't been invaded by them because I haven't got to that point in the game yet."

"Yikes. Better throw them back at the beaches then, or the closest place to them."

"Leon, it's not going to kill you if I subjugate Bulgaria right now, is it?" Shining asked, a tone of humor in his voice.

"Nah, just stay out of Croatia and don't invade me."

"Shouldn't be too hard."

"Alright. I have to admit, it's kind of weird playing as people who depend so much on horses."

"And that bothers you, why?" Ed asked. "You're a pony, and a civilized one at that, not an animal."

"No, but the resemblance is... striking."

"I told you guys a little while back that we invited some humans to ride on our backs during the Ponyville rodeo," Rainbow said. "Ponies are used to that kind of stuff, but knowing about horses and ponies in your world and knowing about the style of riding makes some ponies in Equestria nervous about humans coming here."

"Hence the, er..." Leon tried to find a reasonably respectful word.

"Stupid and idiotic film about humans invading and conquering Equestria," Rainbow said for him. "Yeah, I saw it. It's garbage, as far as I'm concerned, but some ponies take it seriously."

"Not the majority, by any means," Luna injected. "Most are willing to give humans a chance. It's usually a surprise to our people to find that humans don't think of themselves as a species so much as groups of different cultures, religions, and ethnicities."

"I usually don't think of the word 'human' unless I'm talking to a pony, for example," Leon said. "I usually see myself as Catholic, American, Breton-descended, that sort of thing. Faith, country, ethnicity, in other words, like you just said."

"Indeed. There are other pony nations in our world other than Equestria, but nonetheless, the majority of ponies live here, hence the idea of species over nation. Of course, some would label themselves pegasi, earth ponies, or unicorns over just ponies, but less so than a person from your world would consider themselves German, British, or Arab."

Leon nodded, though of course no one was able to see it. 'Ah, got a claim on Segna," he murmured.

"Get mercs before you invade?" Eddy suggested. "Your starting levies won't cut it."

"Roger that. I'll wait until I have enough money."

"Just don't die before you get a chance to claim it. Oh, and it might not be a good idea to get Byzantium angry with you, seeing as they regard you as their lawful prey."

"Yeah, thanks."

"Wish I had money," Shining muttered. "I'm getting less than one gold per month."

"You should get more once you subjugate Bulgaria and institute feudal taxes. That works wonders. Just beware the independence factions."

"Oh, yeah. I'll keep an eye out for 'em, don't worry."

"Negative thirty relations due to government," Leon said sympathetically. "Luckily, your horde should be able to beat them. Of course, you also have to keep the other clans happy..."

"That's what really concerns me."

"What...?" Luna said, surprised. "I... Karloman seems to have died mysteriously, and the war's over, with me as the one sole ruler of both kingdoms."

"Did your mother talk to you a short time beforehand?"

"Ohhhh. Is that what did it?"

"Yeah. She has him assassinated or something. Just form the Empire of Francia before you die and lose your other kingdom."

"I will. The AI almost never does that, and then the Karlings are always infighting over kingdom titles, which they keep losing again due to gavelkind succession."

"And right now, Primogeniture is a long way off."

"I'm actually jealous in this game of other government types," Luna admitted. "You don't have to worry about succession so much as a republic."

"No, but either I have to be elected as an old, old man, which means I don't get very long to rule, or spend a bunch of gold getting to the top, with or without assassinating the current Doge, you understand."

"I kind of have a Primogeniture setup," Shining said. "Kind of. One son inherits all titles. Only real difference is, the one with the most prestige gets them all, not necessarily the oldest. I still prefer it to Gavelkind, though."

"Only thing you can do as Gavelkind is get a higher title than you've got currently, because a king can't be vassal to another king, or a duke to another duke," Leon added. "That, or go and disinherit the other sons by giving them bishop titles, which I would prefer not to do. I mean, I don't mind if that's the career they want, but I don't want to force it on them."

"Hmm."

Leon watched as Shining annexed Bulgaria in short order. Hordes were made entirely of cavalry units, giving massive hitting power. The trade off was that the units had to be replenished either with money or prestige; nomadic rulers, at least early in the game, had difficulty maintaining any lasting prestige, due to the fact that so much counted on it; even laws had to be changed using prestige. The result; a hard-hitting, mobile army, but one that required plenty of upkeep. And, of course, as Leon had said earlier, the people who were subjugated tended not to like it very much, and formed independence factions.

In the meantime, Leon declared war, hired mercenaries and raised his meager levies, and used ships to transport the army to Segna, after which he simply disbanded the vessels. It would take a while for them to be rebuilt, but it was better than paying the outrageous price for their upkeep.

The Slavic Duke of Croatia had no forces to match the professional mercenaries, who crushed his army in short order. Unfortunately, what he and other pagans did have was a very, very low supply limit. Leon was glad that his army wasn't too big, or he'd have lost most of his forces by now. Still, if the war lasted into the winter, he was going to lose men, though not enough to cancel the siege. It was just one of those things. And the negative net balance he was getting due to the mercenaries wasn't helping either.

He checked out the rest of the world as the siege continued. Ed had already expanded, annexing nearby Pictish counts and dukes. Rainbow hadn't expanded, but he noticed that her character had over four hundred gold, so she was busy raiding. Luna was busy subduing nearby lands as well.

He did manage to siege down the province he wanted, even though he suffered some attrition, and forced his opponent to make peace. He immediately set his Court Chaplain to convert the county before dismissing the mercenaries and his own forces.

Right, one province down, two more to go. He was irritated that he'd have to conquer the rest of the duchy before being able to usurp the title, and thereby have the ability to make the Kingdom of Venice, or rather, the Most Serene Republic of Venice, but he was more pleased than not. Having a duchy of his own, as opposed to the other patrician families having only their trade posts and mansions, would give him a leg up in the game. The one big problem, he mused, would be in keeping the Byzantine Emperor happy until he had power to rival theirs, which would be another few hundred years. Of course he'd have problems with the other families, but those were issues he could potentially take care of.

Looking around the world, he noted that the Abbasid Empire was currently engaged in a civil war regarding some person's claim to the throne. It wasn't a very big revolt, though, and it would likely get crushed. He checked the character currently holding the imperial title, and found that he was currently engaged fighting Orthodox rebels, as well as Orthodox heretics. He looked and saw that the guy's decadence was up to 69% already, meaning that a revolt concerning that decadence couldn't be far away.

The more the Muslim states are split up, the better.

The Umayyid Sultanate, the other major Islamic state, located in Spain, was attacking Asturias, a small Catholic kingdom in the north of the Iberian Peninsula. It commonly formed the Empire of Hispania after taking enough of the remaining pieces of Spain. It wasn't initially as strong as the Abbasids were, but it could, if given a chance, take bites out of southern France, or rather, the Kingdom of Aquitaine. It generally was a major target in Catholic crusades, though Jerusalem was considered a higher priority by the Pope.

"Oh, question," Eddy said.

"Say on," Luna answered.

"Can we make it a rule that we have to gang up on the Aztecs when they come?"

"You mean, as in join the person who gets attacked?"

"Yeah, assuming its one of us that gets it."

"I'll take that into consideration. Since they start with well over a hundred thousand troops, it's an idea with merit. How about this; we're only required to defend each other from the Aztecs, but it will be optional to aid AI nations?"

"I guess that's fine, thank you."

"But that happy day is a long way off," Luna continued. "We'll have plenty of time to expand before then."

Leon returned to his business. He didn't look forward to having to conquer the rest of the Duchy of Croatia ten in-game years from now, but luckily, he didn't have to- the Duke of Dioclea, a Slavic Serbian Duke, declared a war of subjugation on the Croatian duke. The war was won within a couple of years, and Leon couldn't help but smile at his good fortune. The only casus belli he had, though, was for a holy war, so other Slavics might choose the join of their own volition. He wasn't about to let that stop him, though.

After collecting about four hundred gold, he hired a couple mercenary bands, of 1,500 men each, declared war, transported his armies to Segna quickly, and set about beginning the work of conquest. After a couple of weeks besieging a province, an enemy army showed up, about half the size of his, and began trying to take Segna. Leon threw his army against them, and destroyed the enemy force totally.

"Bad move, Serbia," Leon said quietly. "Very bad move."

A message suddenly came before him, telling of the Empire of Francia being formed. "Nice one, Luna," he commented.

"Thank you," the Lunar Princess answered. "I'm just glad that my realm will not split into a bunch of separate states forever when my current character dies. How are you doing, Edward?"

"I'm doing fine," the British player answered. "Going to unify Scotland and completely take the Duchy of Orkney, and then I'm going to conquer Ireland to get more troops. I'll also convert to feudalism as soon as I can, but not before upgrading my market places in my holdings to their fullest extent."

"Good. Better still, upgrade everything to their fullest extent."

"Going to try, but that's unlikely. Better to go feudalism as soon as possible and get better troops and taxes."

"I agree, but you could also set up a republic."

"Hmm. More money, but troops aren't as good. I think I'd prefer to stay a kingdom, but that's not a bad idea. Maybe if I play Pictland in single player, I'll do it."

Leon managed to beat another enemy force, but other Slavics had joined. He still had more men, but the advantage wasn't very large. If they got him to attack them where they had favorable ground, the result could be bad indeed.

Fortunately, he managed to capture a province before beating another two enemy armies, which brought his war score up to 100% and allowed him to first take the two provinces he wanted and then usurp the duchy title.

"Just one short monetary step to being Serene Doge," he said contentedly, dismissing his levies and the mercenaries.

"Not a bad start at all," Luna said approvingly. "Granted, the AI helped you a bit."

"Ah well. People make mistakes, we can't expect the machines we make to be flawless."

"True; very true."

"Ah, good, Segna has converted to Catholicism," Leon murmured. "Send Chaplain to Veglia and do the same; there, he's working."

As he began accumulating money, Leon once more checked up on the state of the world. The Abbasids had won their war against the rebels and, as he checked, they declared a jihad for Armenia against the Byzantines. The Umayyids had managed to take enough of Spain to create the Empire of Hispania, changing their color on the map from green to yellow, and were trying to expand into Mala. England was still split up by multiple dukes and petty kings. Luna's Francia controlled most of France save for Brittany, as well as most of Germany. Shining was at war with the Khazarid hordes from more nomadic provinces. Eddy had united Pictland and was annexing the last Norse-controlled province of the Duchy of Orkney. Rainbow was still a one province minor, but was likely to change soon; she had declared a war of subjugation on a duke in northern Lithuania. Russia was split between various Slavic and Suomenusko warlords, as was Finland. Svipjod was in the process of uniting Sweden. India was a mess of kings, dukes, and counts, as usual.

A dinging noise came up, and Leon realized that he could create the title he desired. He immediately declared the foundation of the Most Serene Republic of Venice, a King-level title.

"Nice," Eddy said.

"Thanks. Now I get to keep my new duchy even if I lose the election." Leon immediately started a vote on low crown authority and got it. It was the highest level of crown authority a republic could get to, unfortunately, but it was reasonable in Leon's eyes; the idea of having a government that allowed people to vote was to limit the power of the government. Ultimately, republics didn't have many civil wars that were caused by people wanting less crown authority, but vassals could declare war on one another, which could be problematic in itself, although, if one was a vassal and not the doge - or Serene Doge, now - there were opportunities that could be had in such an arrangement.

Leon checked his balance, as well as his chances for his heir - who was relatively young, and therefore wouldn't have much of an age bonus - to gain the liege-ship when his current character died. The odds, unfortunately, were none too good, at least right now. He'd have to dump money into the campaign fund to have much of a chance. Of course, it wasn't likely he'd die just yet. He probably had some time left. Before he had to hand over the reins to his son, he wanted to upgrade his mansion at least once, preferable twice, thrice if he could manage it; that would raise his trade post limit, allowing him to build more trade posts on prosperous land.

"I'll try taking over Brittany now," Luna announced. "Do you have any problem with that, Edward?"

"Nah. I want all England, Wales, and Scotland. Leave them alone and you're good."

"Alright. Too bad it will require crushing individual counts; this will take more time than I'd like," the Princess grumbled. "I suppose I can create and give the duchy title to one of the two Breton counts I already have, therefore requiring less money to be spent on claims, but that's still bothersome, especially with the re-raising of levies that is required."

Leon watched as Ed finally conquered the remaining island in the Duchy of Orkney. "All that effort for one island?"

"Yeah. Better we get it than the Norse guys. It's closer to us anyway."

"Next target?"

"Iceland, then I'll start working on Ireland for real. Or maybe the other way around, depending on where I'm able to get claims more easily."

The world continued to change. Leon sent his chancellor to Slavonia, his next intended target, though only after relations with the Byzantine Emperor were at +100.

"Ah. I'm sorry, friends," Luna said suddenly, "but once again, I must end the session, raise the moon, and take care of business in another busy night."

"Ugh," Leon groaned discontentedly.

"And I was just about to take out this Irish bloke."

"I don't like it any more than you do, Luna replied, "but I will not neglect my duties to Equestria."

"And I have some reports to complete," Shining added."

"Worry not, dear friends," Luna said calmly. "We will meet again soon enough. Until then, peace be with you."

Dynasty Warriors 8, game 1; Wu Zhang Plains

Leon turned on his Xbox 360 and waited for the others. Before long, Luna invited him to a party, which he joined.

"Greetings, Leon."

"Hey."

"Glad to join you guys," Shining said, joining in.

"Oy, blokes, what's up?" Eddy asked.

"Nothing much, yet," Leon answered. "Just waiting for the game to start."

"Are you sure we all have this one?" Luna asked.

"DW8?" Leon replied. "Yeah, I think we do."

"Yep," Ed said.

"Me too," Shining joined in.

"Alright. Let's get going."

Leon skipped the title sequence and waited until Luna invited him to an online game, which he also accepted.

"Are we doing the campaign or just free battle?"

"Campaign," Luna replied. "Specifically, the final battle of the historical Shu Campaign."

"Oh yes," Leon said. "The Wu Zhang Plains."

"Indeed. I've wanted to try the campaign multiplayer before, but I wanted to try getting all the stars for the historical route first. Unfortunately, I failed on this one, and I was of a mind to ask you to aid me."

"That's fine," Leon answered. "Although I'm not sure what effect that will have on the single-player mode. FYI, all you have to really do is play as Wei Yan, kill the messenger on the right ,and then rush to the other side. If you do it fast enough, the second messenger will just be at the gates of that building on top of the cliff as you reach him."

"Oh, really?"

"Or you could play Ma Dai, he goes the same way Wei Yan does. But the same strategy applies."

"Ah. Well, for once, maybe we could go after such an objective together?"

"Yeah, that would be fine," Eddy answered.

The game began explaining the story leading up to the battle.

"Boring."

"Edward!" Luna said angrily as, halfway through, the story cut and went to character selection.

"Whoops. Oh well. I can listen to the backstory on my own time."

"Rrrr. It's only thirty seconds or so. Okay, fine. Let's make this work. But for that, Leon gets the first choice of character."

Leon chose Jiang Wei immediately. "I can't dislike this guy, even in the Jin campaign when I'm fighting him," he said. "I just love his commitment to Zhuge Liang and Shu's policy of a land of benevolence."

"Meh. It's all just blown up out of proportion," Eddy said.

"I don't care."

"That will be enough," Luna warned. "I'll pick Xingcai."

"Ma Dai," Shining said.

"Wei Yan, seeing as I really have no choice," Eddy said. "Though I do like him, he's a beast."

"I suppose. Is everyone ready?' Luna asked. Everyone answered in the affirmative. "Right, starting."

Leon watched as the intro for the level began to play, but it got skipped and the battle began.

"Blast it, Edward!"

As they began arguing, Leon turned down his mic volume and concentrated on the level. The level's music began playing.

"We shall seize control of the Wu Zhang Plains, no matter what the cost," Zhuge Liang - the Shu strategist - said.

Leon moved forward, bashing several Wei soldiers down with Jiang Wei's double-bladed triton, a rather interesting version of spear. He made his way toward an enemy officer, smacking aside the regular infantrymen.

"Ugh, ballistae," Ed groaned, as the siege engines began firing from a cliff on his side of the plain. "I hate these stupid things."

"And this other guy activated archers," Leon replied, as his character stopped moving for a moment as he got hit by an arrow.

"Archers are nothing," Luna stated. "The ballistae, on the other hoof... an enemy officer is taking cover well within their range."

"Lure him into attacking you," Shining advised. "And then get out of range of the ballistae."

"Yeah, kind of a problem at the moment," Eddy muttered as he got shot up again.

Leon killed one of the officers they were supposed to take out and headed for another. "Let's do this quick. Ed, get on your horse and hit that guy; that'll draw his attention sure as anything, and they won't be able to stop you, even with the stinking ballistae."

"I'll do what I can, I suppose."

Leon killed a small horde of regular enemy infantry while the others took down their targets. While he wasn't as good with Jiang Wei as he was with Zhao Yun, he was still knocking large numbers of enemies out of the fight. It gave him a measure of satisfaction to see the enemies getting destroyed by powerful attacks. The infantry were no match individually for any of their characters.

Three of the officers in the center of the map were killed off relatively quickly, but the fourth wasn't as easy. Ed had to lure him out from under the umbrella of fire provided by the enemy ballistae on the cliff in order to get at him. However, it wasn't hard to take him out once that had happened.

"Ok, I'll go left, like they want me to," Leon said.

"I'll come with you," Luna said. "Edward and Shining Armor, you go right, as we're supposed to."

"Copy that."

"Will do."

Leon scrambled over to the left, where ladders had appeared - the enemy soldiers who had been running away had put them there for their own retreat. It was hard not to think idiots, but Leon managed. Barely. He climbed one of them and began smashing the enemy soldiers who met him, many of whom were archers, who were very annoying to deal with, considering their ranged attack, though they were rarely lethal unless the player was low on health, and Leon wasn't. The archers and their usual peasant protectors went down. Luna helped as she too scrambled up a different ladder.

"Argh!" Luna yelped in surprise as her character was blasted off the cliff. "I'd forgotten about the Arbelests."

"I'll get them." Leon tore into the giant, pre-medieval shotguns, ripping the wooden constructs to pieces. "There, try again."

"Much obliged." Luna climbed up again and began smashing her way through the enemies.

Leon took out an officer, then bashed the gatekeeper until he too was slain.

"Door's open," Luna said. "Here comes that self-obsessed buffoon."

"Zhong Hui, yeah," Leon said. "But I guess he's loved by someone."

"I agree, but still, I think he could use a lesson in humility."

"Right." Leon began smashing through the regular enemies while Luna made her way to the offending officer. She slashed her way through them and anyone standing nearby.

"I got him, I got him!" Leon said as he hit the flying enemy officer.

"No! He's mine!" Luna shouted, getting the killing blow.

"You have blemished my record as well as my pride," Zhong Hui said as he vanished from the display

"Especially the last one," Leon said, to which Luna chuckled. "Chill out, guy."

"Let's keep going. Not too far now..."

Leon and Luna kept going, slapping down any soldier that stood in their way... actually, since all the enemies moved to engage, that meant all of the enemies.

"This is almost too easy," Luna commented.

"I don't know, I like being a battlefield titan," Leon answered.

"I'm not so sure if its worth it if the enemies are all so easy to take down, though."

"I can see your point, but if they're too hard to take down, then where's the... Oh, there's the last door in our way to Sima Yi's fortress."

Both of them moved to engage this officer. Leon ended up getting the killing blow this time, though Luna took out most of the other foes.

"Come out, SIma Yi!" Jiang Wei shouted, as the mission script had him do. "Or are you afraid to face the might of our forces?"

"How dare you speak ill of our commander?" an enemy officer returned. "That's it; I'm going to shut you up for good!"

"Oh boy, here he comes," Leon said, in a deadpan voice. "Just like the other six or seven we've wiped already."

"More experience," Luna replied. "And it's not like the game's getting boring."

"I guess not. You'd think they'd learn, though..."

Both of them mowed down the spearmen and swordsmen who attacked them; Luna again killed the opposing officer.

"You two doing alright?" Eddy asked. "Me and Shiny got to our side of their fortress."

"Sima Yi... Coward... Wei Forces... Weak..." Wei Yan shouted.

"How rude to insult Master Sima Yi like that!" an elderly enemy officer countered. "I owe him greatly. I refuse to forgive your insolent behavior!"

"Yep, we're in position."

"Enough!" Sima Yi shouted. "I will stand this no longer! Open the gates! I will punish these imbeciles myself!"

"My Lord, you know that the enemy is just trying to provoke you," his wife, Zhang Chunhua, replied. "They are hoping that you act rashly."

"Sima Yi refuses to move?" Zhuge Liang said. "Very well. All units, fall back to the main camp. We will make the enemy think I am dead and our forces retreating. Jiang Wei, I leave the rest to you."

Immediately, the allied AI officers began to pull back.

"Oh dear, we seem to be in a position," Luna said. "Shall I head off the messenger, or shall you?"

"I'll do it. Protect the rest of the army; I'll intercept the guys that will follow us. Just make sure that Wu Ban guy gets back safely, or we'll lose the mission."

"Understood."

"Huh? The Shu troops have begun retreating? Send out a pursuit unit; I wish to see what they are up to," Sima Yi ordered.

Luna began to fall back. Leon ran forward, attacking the enemy officers who came out of the gate in front of him.
"Ed, get the guys on your side."

"I'll get 'em; Shiny's going to kick the messenger in the teeth, because, hey, that's what horses do best."

"Hey!"

"Oh stifle it; I got kicked the face by a horse when I was eight years old, almost lost a couple of teeth myself, so I should know."

"You can't hold me responsible for that!"

"They've seen our pursuit unit, yet continue to fall back..." Sima Yi mused. "Could it be... Could it be that Zhuge Liang is dead? Ha ha ha ha! Send out the messenger!"

"Get serious, people, here they come," Luna urged.

Leon had half-killed the officer sent out to pursue the Shu forces when the messengers on either side of the map activated, along with numerous peons. "I'm on it, I'm on it," he said, bashing the officer in the face with his weapon until he died. He began dashing for the messenger, who hadn't gone far.

It was easy. All he had to do was slap the X button once, and the messenger was history.

"Got the other guy," Shining said.

"So, assuming we've won..."

"We'll have unlocked that alternate ending after the battle," Shining confirmed. "We've done it, Princess."

"Not quite; we still have to take down Sima Yi."

At that moment, Sima Yi said, "I have no interest in facing Shu with Zhuge Liang gone. Shi, Zhao, finish them."

"Everyone to the center!" Leon said loudly.

"I'm still fighting the officer who is trying to ambush Wu Ban," Luna said. "I'll be right there when I'm finished with him, though."

Leon called his horse, then rode to the center of the map, bashing a few enemies along the way as he did so. When he got there, at least four enemy officers were approaching the Shu base.

"The enemy is approaching our main camp," Jiang Wei said worriedly. "Prepare to give them a warm welcome with our weaponry!"

Arbelests appeared out of nowhere and began shooting the Wei troops.

"Ugh! We can't get any closer to their camp with those things around!" a random Wei soldier cried.

"Let's get 'em!" Eddy yelled, wading into the enemy forces.

"I've got Sima Zhao," Shining said.

"I'll take on Sima Shi," Leon replied. He disliked the Jin campaign in the game, feeling like he was doing the work of the bad guys whenever he played it. At least in the other campaigns there was some common camaraderie between the characters that overcame any such feelings. The Sima family claimed they wanted the land to be ruled by "talent," but while Leon wasn't against the idea of people getting a position because they worked hard for it and had talent for it, it didn't mean he agreed with the way they applied that belief.

"Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?" Sima Zhao asked. "That's right; you used to fight for Wei, didn't you?"

"I realized that my true destiny lay with Shu," Jiang Wei replied. "I have nothing to be ashamed of."

Leon continued fighting. Now reunited, there was nothing currently on the battlefield capable of stopping the four friends as they crushed officer after officer and knocked down every common soldier in sight.

"Our path is almost clear," Shining said. "There isn't much stopping us from getting inside their main camp. In fact, there's nothing stopping us."

The last of the enemy officers in the center of the map was felled. "Then why don't we invite ourselves inside?" Eddy asked.

All four friends began to rush inside the enemy main camp, battering down anyone that stood in their way.

"I count five or six of them left," Eddy said.

"We'll get them," Leon promised. "No way they can stop us now."

Leon made his way toward the remaining cluster of foes guarding the door to Sima Yi's chamber. "You want to kill the guys of to either side, or just finish them?" he asked.

"I'll take the one to the right," Shining said.

"I've got the left," Eddy said.

"Leon and I will just straight up attack the cluster around the doorway, then," Luna said. "I must say, there's part of me that's eager and ready to go."

"In pilot's terms, I think the appropriate phrase is, 'Fangs out,'" Leon replied.

"Oh yes, I know that one," Luna replied as she and Leon went to work. "My thestral guards took a liking to it, and have adopted it for themselves."

"Hopefully they haven't had to use it for real," Leon said as his weapon sent three enemies flying.

"Not yet, but they, and most of the pegasi in the guard, have taken a liking to human air force terms."

"Going after Zhang Chunhua," Leon said, attacking to woman who was Sima Yi's wife (and who was armed and attempting to fight back).

"Not like she's a challenge," Eddy answered. "Every one knows women can't fight."

There was a silence.

"You realize," Luna began, "that in saying that you've just insulted every mare in Equestria, not to mention myself, my sister, and Princess Cadence, and every female human in the military, right?"

"Oops. I meant-"

"I know what you meant. Considering the trouble Twilight and her friends have been put through, I'd say that remark is incredibly inaccurate. Even if that was a joke, I hope to never hear it again."

"Sorry, Princess."

"Apology accepted, but please watch what you're saying next time."

Leon and Luna struck down most of the regular enemy soldiers, and both went after Chunhua. Luna ended up being the one to take her down.

"Nice!"

"Thanks! But there's still Sima Yi to deal with. And the evil man with the axes."

"Yep."

"Got my man," Ed noted.

"Me too," Shining added. "We're on our way."

"They seem to be giving a fair amount of trouble," Sima Yi mused. "Very well. I will deal with them myself."

"Understatement of the year right there," Eddy said. "His army's gone."

"Let's finish it, then," Luna urged.

"You really think you beat me?" Sima Yi said, as if in answer. "Your stupidity amuses me."

Leon smashed him in the face with his weapon. "Try this on for size then," he answered.

All four began laying blows on the recalcitrant enemy commander.

"Gotcha!" Eddy yelled, getting the killing blow.

"Of course," Luna moaned, just before the scene they'd fought to unlock began. "I swear that I'll take away your admin rights on that server in Minecraft if you skip this, Edward."

Luckily, there was no interruption, and they managed to watch the scene unhindered.

(Scene in particular begins at about 15:05 min.)

"I love the emotions displayed in these scenes," Luna said as the scene ended. "It really feels like the characters are determined in their efforts and care about the fate of the land."

"Well, they did in real life, although as Ed said earlier, they blew things way out of proportion in these games," Leon replied.

"Yeah, and I'm not so sure an extra thirty seconds or so of material is worth it," Ed said.

"I'm glad you took my threat seriously," Luna said firmly. "I meant it."

"I know."

"Is there anything else you require, or do you want to play something else?" Shining asked.

"I apologize, but I have a meeting in half an hour with ambassadors from the Buffalo tribes. We'll have another crisis on our hooves if we don't settle with them over their rights to the lands."

"Oh," Shining answered, a little disappointed.

"Don't worry, I shall be available for another gaming session tomorrow night," Luna said. "I wish a good night to all of you, and a fond farewell."

"Crisis, crisis, crisis; isn't it always, Luna?" Leon asked.

Luna chuckled lightly. "Don't worry, I can take care of this. Adieu."

Leon got out of the battle, took off his headset, and turned off his Xbox. Yawning, he stretched, walked to his bookshelf, and looked silently at a picture Luna had sent him. It showed her and Celestia sitting in front of a guard post at the Equestrian foreign ministries office, waving happily toward the camera.

It was entitled, To my dear friends in far away places...

Author's Note

Not sure if it's possible to play historical/hypothetical campaign missions in multiplayer like you would in singleplayer, but hey, this was worth a shot.

Some people might not get the character names and references unless they have played this game/series, and especially if they have not played this level of the game.

Sorry this took so long. Writer's block + life + procrastination :twilightblush:

Oh, and neither video is mine; as well as showing the final scene at the end, they display the level played, as well as the epic OST for it. I just wanted to show the level, as well as test the ability to put videos in the story, so that people can see the game for itself and what its like, to ease the potential confusion.

Civilization; Beyond Earth, Game 2; Rising Tide

"Hopefully this goes better than our previous endeavor," Twilight said as the game began to start.

"You mean with the aliens overrunning a bunch of things and destroying them? Yeah," Leon said. "Let's try not to destroy our own civilizations."

"Oh, come on," Eddy said, having connected. "If we're not killing aliens, we'll be killing each other. Better to deal with the threat to everyone than with each other."

"That assumes that no state of peace can exist," Luna said. "And I seriously doubt that will be the case."

"At least we get to start with the new Rising Tide DLC," Rainbow added. "This is going to be epic!"

"Indeed. I'll be the host," Luna said. "We'll choose our factions and all that once you've all joined."

Leon joined quickly. He chose Franco-Iberia again, along with engineers, an extra population, and the ability to see advanced resources off the bat. Luna had chosen a map with the usual continents, so there would be water and land civilizations. Naval combat had been remodeled. Instead of just carriers and dreadnaughts, there were now submarines and smaller patrol boats that were, in essence, melee units. Cities could be built on water now, and the diplomacy had been almost completely reworked, so it wasn't a copy of Civ 5 diplomacy anymore. There were also new factions, along with a diplomatic currency that could be expended to aid in diplomatic matters or to build units and upgrade the faction.

"I'll take the North Sea Alliance," Eddy said. "Britons at last."

"Actually, I think they're Scandinavian," Leon said.

"Oh what, really? Well, closer, I guess."

"I'll be INTEGR," Twilight said.

"Brasilia," Rainbow said simply. "Going to pound me some aliens... and any of you that decide to get in my way."

"I'll be the Kavithan Protectorate," Luna answered.

"Franco-Iberia," Leon finished.

"Frenchie going French again."

"I swear, Ed, if you twit me about that again-"

"That will be quite enough of that," Luna warned. "I'll not start this off by having you both shouting your heads off at each other. This game is going to remain civil, or I'll boot both of you out - with an iron shod hoof, I may add. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Princess," Leon and Eddy both mumbled.

"Good. Now, to actually get the game rolling."

"Any special rules this time?" Eddy asked.

"Yes. No attacking another player until 100 turns have passed. This excludes the AI, aliens, and stations. Also, no cursing or bad sportsman - and pony - ship."

"And no arrow to the knee jokes," Leon put in. "That's a paddling."

Luna laughed. "Just for fun, I'll leave that up there," she said. "Other than that, you may play as you like. I'm starting the game now."

Leon waited - impatiently - as the loading screen came up. Although the screens didn't just display random galaxies, stars, and planets anymore, it was still boring. When the green button finally showed up, he hit it without hesitation.

His starting location wasn't all that bad; an a ocean tile with algae, with some Chitin and Tubers. He decided he was satisfied, and landed. His city set up immediately, and he chose to start work on an Old Earth Relic; culture was extremely valuable, and necessary to get more virtues. He sent his scout to look around.

"Kinda sucks that the scouts never get upgrades, or even experience," Eddy said sadly.

"It makes sense, though," Luna replied. "They're really only useful in the first two hundred turns or so. After that, they're just fancy toothpicks. And in this game, the only thing they could upgrade into is a stronger scout, which would still be weaker than the average infantry unit of the same Affinity level."

"They'd still be stronger against the aliens."

"True. Still, the aliens become less of an issue later on, though, unlike Civ 5 barbarians, they remain in the game until the end."

"I've seen barbarians survive until the end of the game," Leon objected. "Usually on ice tiles that you can't invade or settle on, so you can't kill the camp outright, though you can blow up the units on top of them."

"Oh, of course. But except for arctic holdouts like them, barbarians fade out. And I wonder what would happen if you nuked the camp. I've never bothered to waste a nuclear weapon on such a camp, but I'm mildly curious to find out what would happen."

Leon managed to get a couple of resource pods and finish the OER. He started on a Clinic right away.

"Got a couple nests not far from me," Rainbow said. "Can't wait to get started on them." Her hooves made a loud clunk! as they collided.

"Please don't kill so many that they turn orange this time," Twilight asked. "Or red."

"Hey, no worries."

"I always worry when it comes to you in Civillization games."

"Excuse me, could anyone tell me what the... er, dickens these ocean plant things are?" Eddy asked.

"The Hydrocoral. Um, I think they just block you," Leon answered. "But they won't damage your units except in self defense.

"Oh, so just naval range firing range targets?"

"Uh, sure. Just don't melee them."

"Ah, got it."

Leon saw a bit of Hydrocoral not far away from his own capital. Unlike Eddy, though, it wouldn't be a big problem. A couple factions, especially the North Sea Alliance, specifically excelled at naval settlement. Leon could have chosen to settle on water if he wanted to, but in this case, with ample land resources in sight, he wasn't going to make it a priority, though it would be an option he could pursue later if necessary, or if he decided to. Naval exploration would be higher on the list of priorities, but not settlement.

He discovered another resource pod, completing a quest and gaining some energy, culture, and science. The bonus was small, but it would still help.

"Hold on, why can't we negotiate with each other?" Luna asked, sounding confused.

"It's part of the DLC," Leon replied. "Have to physically see each other before being able to communicate, like older Civs."

"Oh. That's unexpected, but I suppose it might be more balanced, or at least add challenge to the game. Hoping to see how the new diplomacy works."

"There's a new diplomatic currency as well," Twilight noted. "You get it - and can lose it - in diplomatic deals, as well as from certain buildings."

"Ah. That will be interesting."

"You can use it to improve your own civilization, as well as add certain perks and upgrade them."

"Oh, that's very nice. Would you mind showing me how to do it? I'm not yet used to Rising Tide."

While Twilight ran Luna through the motions, Leon produced a soldier unit and attacked a Wolf Beetle that had wandered near his capital. The alien unit was reduced to 21 HP with the combination of the unit attack and city bombardment. The alien countered on its own turn by attacking, only to be destroyed.

"Interesting. Diplomatic capital. And you say it can improve my faction's unique ability?" Luna asked, still in conversation with Twilight.

"Yes. And the diplomacy has received a complete overhaul. Some of the bonus that you choose, which can be domestic, military, and productive in origin, influence the treaties you can make with other factions. You can also sped diplomatic capital to increase or decrease your relationship with them. The lowest you can go is war, the highest is an alliance."

"So if I decided to go to, say, Edward or Leon's picture and raise our relationship to 'cooperative', that means..."

"You would have increased the options available in the diplomatic process. If you raised the relationship to allied, if you got attacked by anyone, your ally would automatically join you. Of course, the same goes for you."

"Hmm. Being forced to fight when it's not my decision to is rather repugnant to me."

"I feel that way too. When I'm playing with the AI, I get stuck in some stupid war that I can't get out of. I'm hoping that anyone we choose to ally ourselves with is willing to take that into consideration," Twilight answered, putting emphasis on the last few words.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you say something?" Eddy asked.

"Urgh!"

Leon found an alien nest with his scout, presumably the one where the Wolf Beetle had come from. He wasn't overjoyed by its existence; a Harmony player might be, but Leon was not a Harmony player. His scout got attacked by the unit defending the nest as well, which did nothing to change his opinion. Sullenly, he withdrew. I'll be back, and next time, you are going down.

"Aaah! Siege worm next to my capital!" Twilight cried out.

"Ha ha!" Eddy laughed. "Next time build on water!"

"That's not funny, Ed," Leon said.

"Why no- oh, bugger, Kraken!"

"That's why."

"Maybe next time you'll think before you start shooting off your mouth," Luna advised. "So, Twilight," she continued, "do the faction leaders have any sort of personality now?"

"Oh, yes," the unicorn answered. "INTEGR's leader is impressed with people who have high levels of technology and science, and there's one - Barre or Hutama or somebody - whose respect increases if you're getting a lot of gold per turn."

"Hang on, respect?"

"Oh, of course, you wouldn't know. There's another side to diplomacy; fear and respect. Respect increases or decreases if you're doing something another faction likes, while fear increases or decreases depending on your military might. Nations with low respect and fear for you will eventually degrade their relationship with you. On the other hoof, or hand, if you guys are listening, someone who has a high level of respect of you will increase, or be more willing to accept an increase, in your relationship. Someone with a high fear of you is more likely not to attack you, and will be more willing to give in to... well, imperialistic or tyrannical demands."

"I see," Luna said. "A lot has been added."

"Including more alien species," Rainbow put in. I've got these... whatever you call 'ems snooping around my capital."

"Scarabs. They're even weaker than the Wolf Beetles," Leon said.

"Whatever they are, Rainbow Dash is gonna deal with 'em."

"Yeah, you go ahead and do that."

A Kavithan unit passed by Le Coeur, Leon's capital. "Hello, Leon," Luna said cheerfully.

"Hey."

"Good for horses, better for cows," Luna chucked. "And delicious for ponies."

"Heh, though considering I've never seen you or Celestia eat it, how would you know?"

"The show doesn't display every aspect of our lives. For example, it rarely shows ponies with horseshoes nailed to their hooves, but those are more common than you've been lead to believe. Likewise, the Equestrian royalty does eat hay, though probably less than the general citizenry, and admittedly we do have access to better food, or at least more varieties of it. In the meantime, would you like to sign a cooperative agreement?"

"I think that would be agreeable to both of us."

Leon signed the agreement that came up, and then searched for sources of titanium nearby; not really for the resource itself, but for the extra production it would provide. He found one, but it had no other resources within the circle of territory the settlement would initially produce. There were more further away, but there were also a couple alien nests in close proximity. To build a city in that location, while somewhat desirable, would yield a lot of short-range frustration, though potential long-range fruit. He decided to skip that spot for now, and looked elsewhere.

"Any developments in Canterlot lately?" Eddy asked. "Or in Equestria as a whole?"

"Ah, yes. Well, as you know there was a crisis regarding the Changelings and their Queen recently."

"Yeah, I remember talking about that."

"We've managed to expand on the diplomatic deal we made. A number of ponies and changelings will be, shall we say, trading spaces? Its a sort of cultural exchange program. We see how their society works, they see how ours works."

"Isn't that kind of ripping them off? Obviously, they've had access to Equestria before, possibly years or even decades, if not centuries."

"It's rather hard to argue that point when Equestria's finest was recently knocking on your front door, guns drawn and ready."

"Well, how will you know that the party you send will be safe?" Leon asked.

"Oh, we'll have Guards accompany them, and they're to send messages by magic every few hours to make sure they're safe. The changeling party will also have its own escort. And, as I've said, we've recently made a pretty big show of force to Chrysalis, so, while no doubt she'll have some treachery in mind, its unlikely that she'll carry it out."

"Yeah, but can't the changelings fake the letters?"

"That's the genius of it; the letters will have a secret, invisible stamp on them that will reveal whether or not they were sent by the appropriate party. If they do take the observers prisoner and attempt to fake the letters, we'll know immediately what they've done. Only the Guards know about it, and they wouldn't tell anypony, or anyone, for that matter, even if their lives were at stake. We'll have our army march on them, and this time it will come to war, with a much higher penalty than we imposed initially, with occupation and the removal of Chrysalis, however that might be accomplished, from power."

"Okay. But still, that's allowing them to have more access to higher-end technology, like the computers we're currently using."

"We - that is to say, Celestia, Cadence and I - have discussed this and other potential, foreseeable troubles. Even though they'll indeed have greater access to technology now, we've have had it and understood it longer than they have, which will leave us with a significant lead. And, might I add, we'll have numbers on our side and remain alert. The Royal Guard isn't going to be caught napping again."

"Hmm."

"I know, its a controversial deal, and its not popular. But we want to create a lasting peace, and that means both sides have to give a little. And we're not going to wipe out a whole species just to have that peace; that would turn us into the very monsters we were fighting, or even worse."

"Twilight, you've been rather quiet during all this; did you know about it?" Ed asked

"I did," the unicorn answered. "I wasn't thrilled. But I trust my friends, regardless of how high or low they are in power. I'm not going to protest about it further than I already have unless the changelings go back on their word."

Leon didn't answer. He wasn't sure whether this was a good idea, but then, he hadn't been asked. He decided to just keep playing. Another alien chose to come up toward his city; it got blasted by the defenses, and then was rushed by the soldiers near the city.

"How long do you think it'll be until they unleash another DLC for the game?" Eddy asked.

"I don't know," Leon answered. "The reception of this game was less positive than Civ 5, so its anyone's guess whether or not they're going for another DLC on the level of Rising Tide or if they're working on Civ 6."

"Not sure what they could do to make it better than Civ 5. I'd say that game's going to be the favorite for Civ players for a long time."

"Of course, when it comes to video games, a game only stays 'cool' for maybe a couple years. Then its on to something new, which is kinda frustrating. I mean, instead of unleashing all these new consoles on the world, why not just release more DLC for games that already exist, and add more gameplay and aspects of gameplay to stuff that's already out there? I want to get Toy Soldiers; War Chest, but means getting an Xbox One, when I have a perfectly good Xbox 360 that could either be upgraded or updated or something."

"You could sell the 360."

"With all the stuff I've got on it? Nope. I doubt they'll be able to move all the downloaded stuff from my XBL file onto the new console, and even then, how many of the games that I've got are actually going to be able to play on the XB One, backwards compatibility considered?"

"Heh, good point. And yeah, it's kind of rubbish to pay a price that high when you've already got a 'Box that works right."

"And they waste all that energy making new games when they could just expand the old. I mean, how many Halo games are out there now? They could have just unleashed more DLC for one to expand for half a decade or more, instead of just ditching a good game after a year or two. I'm still ticked that because of the mentality of the video game companies that the whole hacker problem for Call of Duty games is un-dealt with, just because the games in question are a few years old."

"Oh boy, don't get me started on them. Played COD 5 the other day, and these guys all came flying, shooting their fingers off and half-way buried in the ground. Seriously, they need to take responsibility for any game people still play, even if its years old. But you're not going to change minds alone, Leo. Game companies tend to be about the money, not the quality or playability of older games."

"Hold on, another alien." After zapping it with soldier units, Leon went on, "I guess that's true. Still, I get ticked when I see a perfectly nice game for the Xbox One that I can't get simply because I don't have the right console."

"Ah, money, money, money. Always needed, and yet somehow always lacking when needed."

"I hope the recession isn't hurting you guys that bad."

"...Well, personally my family and I are still well off, but I've seen some poor homeless buggers on the streets, and you know that's a bad sign anywhere."

"Yeah. I've seen some too; poor guys. I know that some people out there are faking it, but there are plenty who aren't. The world has plenty of food and money to eliminate or at least severely limit poverty, if only people used it properly. I guess I shouldn't be talking; I mean, if any of us knew how to use money right, then what are we doing here?"

"Having a good time as friends," Luna injected. "Though I concede the point. And it's not just your world that struggles."

"Don't tell me the recession has spread to you guys?"

"No, not really. But Equestria isn't a perfect country either, regardless of how its depicted in the show. I'm glad some of the more recent episodes have picked up on that; as in your lands, there are people and ponies who are homeless and poor, and ponies that are rich and just don't care. Prince Blueblood... I'm almost ashamed to consider him my nephew. Don't get me wrong; I still love him, and he's family, after all, but his concern is for his own status in life, not for those who really need aid. I have hopes that my sister and I can reform him, but it will be a slow and perhaps painful process. In the meantime, we're doing what we can to help, but we cannot be everywhere at once, and we do face opposition; not on the surface perhaps, but rather... oh, how do I put this...?"

"Underground?" Leon suggested.

"Criminal underworld?" Eddy said.

"Sub-surface?" Twilight replied.

"All of the above explain it a bit, but without the literal underground that they all suggest. Ponies paint one face, nodding with us on the one hoof, while under that mask they reject our reforms."

"Ah, I get it."

"The fact is, in this life, we'll always have people who refuse to share their plentiful wealth and resources that could be used to help the world's problems."

Leon's hand made its way to the cross hanging around his neck. In this life...

"Even so, there are those willing to share what little they have so that others might know some measure of abundance, however little that is."

"Rarity gave a sizable amount of bits to an orphanage yesterday," Twilight said. "Not everypony who has money is stingy with it."

"No indeed, and I'm grateful to her. But my heart would rest easier if there were more out there like her."

Leon got his first colonist unit out, and began moving it to the desired location, guarded by a soldier. "How's her business holding up, anyway?"

"Well, its expanded slightly since our first - or at least, first official - contact meeting with humanity," Twilight said. "She's made dresses for human women as well as mares, which has increased profits, albeit not as much as she had hoped."

"I see."

"Is there any truth to the idea that Equestria is a feminist society?" Eddy asked.

"Whoa, Ed, where did that come from?" Leon asked, surprised and a little shocked.

"Hey, I've seen females in charge of just about everything, and a couple friends told me to ask, and since we're talking about Rarity only making things for women-."

"Certainly not," Luna said, shocked. "The fact that I, my sister, and Princess Cadence are mares is because, for whatever reason, we were born that way. Equestria is not, never was, and I dearly hope never becomes a society as such. There are plenty of stallions in charge of cities and businesses, and if either Celestia or I had been born as one, we would have had equal rights. Naturally, since the show was intended by Hasbro to reach an audience of young girls and early teenage girls, Equestria seems that way. Please rest assured it is not."

"Might want to remember that answer in our next livestream," Leon advised. "I think that's a big question people have, or else a misconception we can dispel."

"I'll consider it. I suppose its inevitable."

Leon chewed up a few more aliens, then collected a couple more resource pods. "Oh, got an artifact," he said with surprise.

"A what?"

"Oh right, another new thing. Well, if you get three of them and combine them together, it will invent a building that you can then build in your cities. Not sure if what you get is random or not. There are three types; Human, alien and Progenitor. You usually stumble upon human relics in resource pods or get them as a result of a quest, I think. Alien and Progenitor artifacts are found by exterminating nests and searching ruins, respectively."

"Oh, so there's a reason to kill alien nests now than for just securing your borders. That's interesting," Luna replied, clearly deep in thought.

"Yes, but don't go hog-wild killing aliens," Twilight broke in. "We don't want them to turn orange, or worse, red."

"Who cares how ticked the aliens get?" Eddy asked. "More experience! Well, if you have fences in every city, that is."

"Not going to answer that. Go ahead with that, if you want to," Twilight answered, clearly a little annoyed. "Just don't get angry at us if we decline to trade with you or anything."

"Ah, I don't need anyone else to win! I can go it alone!"

"Aha aha, right. Try telling yourself that later."

Leon watched the alien nest near the potential city location carefully with his Explorer. "Still say these guys would lose against Civ 5 scouts," he said.

"The Explorers?" Luna answered. "In terms of the game mechanics... possibly. But in real life I doubt it. They have guns; scouts have sticks."

"But at least they could deal with barbarians and be upgraded," Leon argued. "These guys just move, sit around, and die; no upgrades."

"I believe we've talked about this before. It probably won't change."

"Alright. Still, it's so infuriating when you're trying to excavate something and aliens just decide to murder you just because an alien nest is nearby."

"It is, but my point holds."

Leon killed another Scarab unit that was blocking the way, then placed the colonist in its location and hit the button. Now all it was going to take was time... and patience, which was rarely in good supply for Leon.

"Another alien nest pulverized," Rainbow announced.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Rainbow," Twilight warned. "Do you want to be swarming with aliens?"

"Relax, egghead; I've got one of those fence things up; they can't touch me."

"They have other ways of doing damage. Until you get the event for your trade convoys, they'll be in danger, and they be in even greater danger if..." Twilight stopped. "Wait, you didn't go for the +1 range on the fence already, did you?"

The silence said it all.

"Ugh... Never, ever, ever, ever go with that decision! All it does is keep aliens out of your city's range of tiles that it can use, and your military can do that! now your trade units will be vulnerable forever!"

"Ok, so maybe I goofed up... once. It won't happen again."

"How many times have we heard that?"

While Twilight and Rainbow began to argue, Leon eyed the nearby nest. It was two tiles away from the outpost he'd just founded, and he knew the aliens weren't going to sit around, regardless of his intentions toward them. fortunately, he had a Ranger coming up, though it was a couple turns away, which would help bombard aliens that were actually in range, but until then, the two soldiers - soon to upgrade to marines, once he completed a task that involved an affinity reward - were on their own.

Lacking any other real action, Leon looked at the Kavithan side of the map. Luna was doing well; her unique ability allowed her to gobble up tiles faster than other civilizations, and she had already founded an outpost. While there were alien nests nearby, he was confident that she would either clear them out or handle - hoofle? That sounded weird - the attacks.

When it was his turn again, he moved his Ranger closer to the outpost, then formed a barrier with the soldiers he had. It wasn't impressive, but it would do. It would have to, considering that a couple Wolf Beetle units had moved into attacking positions. On their turn, they attacked, doing damage to each of the defending units, but the line held out. Leon had both his units heal, which would also place them into a defensive stance.

As he fought off the alien attacks, he heard Luna speaking. "Our relations with the buffalo have always been shaky, but the recent meeting has dropped the chances of trouble."

"You mean they're not going to stampede all the way to Canterlot and flatten the town?"

"Ha ha, Edward. No, they will not try that. But we have to give them some leeway, even if our armies now possess modern weaponry. They have some valid concerns about their land, and our settlements in the south and west. The Crown's control is not as solid there as it is in most of Equestria, and for the simple reasons that those settlements are on the frontier, as far away as the pioneers could settle and still technically be under Equestrian rule."

"I'm assuming there are reasons for that," Leon put in, fighting off the aliens again. "They probably don't want to pay taxes, and in frontier towns..."

"Well, yes, that's one of the reasons; as I said, our control of those areas isn't solid and grounded as it is in, say, Canterlot, Ponyville, and Manehattan. Another is that the settlers often didn't, and often still don't, check with the local buffalo tribes to make sure the land they plan to settle on isn't a traditional burial ground or stampeding trail."

"And you're trying to reassert control over the frontier towns."

"That's one of the things we're trying to do, as well as redirect settlement. Unfortunately, some ponies think that if land isn't settled, then it isn't claimed or used right, and they then believe that they have the right to settle where they please. Luckily, I've assured the buffalo that their tribe's land will not be settled, and that if our will in this is disobeyed, we shall force the settlers to move. I may respect their independent spirit, but that doesn't mean I will tolerate direct disobedience."

Leon managed to kill off the two aliens attacking his troops, but more would be coming. Another enemy unit spawned in the nest. On the bright side, the ranger managed to get inside the outpost and fire, knocking the aliens' health down.

"At least there's some sort of nomadic structure in the game now," Eddy said. "I can move my city wherever I want to."

"Just be careful," Twilight advised. "There are a lot of water-borne aliens. As for being nomadic, I'm afraid that the Civilization game engine just isn't made for that. Native American civilization were mostly nomadic, but in the games they have to settle just like every other faction."

"Rise of Nations does a bit better," Leon said. "The Lakota can build things on any land that isn't already claimed."

"That's still inaccurate, considering that nomads have no permanent structures. Crusader Kings 2 comes closest out of any game I can readily think of for anything close to true nomadic lifestyle."

Leon battered the alien guarding the nest with the Ranger again, then crushed it with his soldiers and pillaged the nest. "Finally, a little safety for my outpost."

"At the cost of the aliens. Weren't we just talking about the buffalo and Native Americans?"

"Native Americans could barter. The aliens can't, and don't. Neither do Barbarians in Civ 5."

"It's kind of weird, don't you think, that we come to their planet and call them the aliens?"

"I've had that idea before," Luna injected. "Considering that the original word 'alien' means something strange or foreign, I think it fits, though more so if the aliens use the word against us, assuming they have some form of language."

"Obviously, they have some form of communication, because they all get mad at the same time if you kill too many of them," Twilight said.

"I think it's more the concept of a hive mind, so to speak, as opposed to verbal communication," Luna answered. "Somewhat like the changelings, though the latter can and do use verbal language, including one of their own."

"The original game was a lot more hectic," Leon said. "Alpha Centauri, I mean. The aliens were really terrifying then, both in description and in how many would come at you, as well as how powerful they got. Eventually they'd actually grow to be a match for your most advanced military units. The ones in this game are just glorified Barbarians, even if they do cooperate and some of them are powerful. They don't grow as a threat in scale to your military; eventually, your level of alignment just turns them into target practice."

"I've played the original game once," Eddy said. "Leo's right; they're scary there. And the random events that happened effected the game more."

"How so?" Twilight asked as Leon began building a trade convoy.

"There was one where something screwed up communications so you couldn't negotiate with other factions. Another made the aliens reproduce at an insane rate."

"Oh, yikes."

"Yeah. And that's without all the stuff the other factions got up to. Space China hated everyone."

Leon continued to explore, knocking out aliens and recovering resource pods.

"How is everyone holding up?" Luna asked.

"I'm fine," Rainbow said. "Just have to get more production; my capital is a little bare when it comes to hammers."

"I'm doing okay," Twilight replied. "Although I have a lot of miasma to work through, and a lot of forested hills to pass."

"Got a few ocean-going aliens, but other than that I'm doing fine," Eddy said. "My navy is up to the task."

"Meh, got some aliens to BBQ, but I'm going to be alright," Leon replied.

"Ah, very good. I wouldn't get excited yet, though; there are AI factions to meet."

"Who cares?" Eddy asked. "I love stomping the computer."

"They have been set to a high difficulty standard," Luna warned. "They'll be able to out-produce you even if they can't out-fight you."

"More experience. And you only get so much for killing aliens."

Leon sent his convoy out to a new settlement that Luna had established. There were no alien nests in the vicinity of the trade route, but he knew they could be roaming around anywhere. He got started on building a hypersonic fence.

A faint knock came over the headset. "Yes, what is it?" Luna said, her voice muffled; she'd taken her headset off. A voice answered, too faint for Leon to make out, which went on for some time. There was a faint groan, and then, "Yes, tell my sister I'll be there soon. No, I don't know exactly, just tell her I'm coming."

"Oh great," Leon moaned.

"I'm afraid so," Luna said, putting her headset back on. "It seems that there has been some trouble in Cloudsdale; a gang of pegasi criminals have been caught and brought to Canterlot for trial; it is my duty, as well as my sister's to oversee and judge the case."

"Just deport them and skip the case," Eddy suggested.

Luna snorted. "I'm afraid I can't do that. Ours may be an absolute monarchy, but we have laws to follow, and it would be hypocritical for us to ignore laws that we've passed just for the sake of our own convenience."

"Why not leave it up to the civil authorities?" Leon asked.

"Because this captured gang, or some of its members, anyway, are believed to be responsible for assault and battery against a group of ambassadors, thereby making the case one of national importance."

"Oh," Leon replied. "That changes things a bit."

"Oh, just a little," Luna answered sarcastically. "Nonetheless, I must go, even though I'd rather stay here and continue playing. I'll save the game, though, so that we can continue at a later date. No promises as to when we'll meet again; it all depends on how this case goes. A fond farewell and good night to you all."

Victoria 2, Game 2; 1861 Balkans

"Are you guys sure we're ready for this?" Shining asked.

"I think so," Luna replied. "We've been playing our first game for some time, and I think that, for our livestream, we should be starting something new."

"This focus is kind of quirky, though," Eddy said. "I mean, we're relying on crises and on our sphere overlords to get any real gains, at least at first."

"I guess the uncertainty is what makes the entire thing worth it," Leon answered.

"We're just waiting for our last person," Luna said. "I think we'll have to start soon, though, if she doesn't show up."

"Well, just to recap, we're all playing Balkan nations, right?" Leon asked.

"Correct, or other nations that can otherwise trigger crises in order to gain land. And we'll be starting in the Civil War era; that means Italy is formed, and the USA and the CSA are at war."

"Greece, Romania, Serbia... Montenegro is an option, but they would clash with the possibility of Serbia forming Yugoslavia," Leon mused.

"Someone can also play as the Ottoman Empire," Luna added. "Montenegro is out for the reason you stated, Leon, but the Ottomans are acceptable. The biggest rule is that players are not allowed to eliminate other players, and Serbia and Montenegro would be fighting each other to form Yugoslavia, since one or the other would have to go in order to form it. Other rules include no cursing, of course, and insulting other people is out."

"Just to clarify, we're not giving up on our first game just because we're playing this, right?" Shining asked.

"Oh, no. That we'll finish, have no fear. But for the sake of a livestream we'll be doing this."

"Any other rules?"

"No 'permanent' occupation, which means not occupying someone else, in a permanent state of war, just to force them to accept a peace treaty that goes above 100% war score."

"Oh come on," Eddy objected. "That's the best way to force obstinate people and trolls into line in this game."

"No permanent occupations, period. End of discussion."

"Does everything else apply?" Leon asked. "Like, we're allowed sphere each other, go to war, cut down to size, et cetera?"

"Yes. Other than the things I've mentioned, we can all play how we like."

"I call Romania," Leon said.

"Oh wow, I thought you'd say Greece. Guess I'll be Greek, then."

"I'll be Egypt," Shining said.

"Right. That will leave myself and our guest to choose," Luna said. "I'll probably go with Serbia, in the hopes of creating Yugoslavia."

"Which will likely leave someone else up to our guest, who you haven't really introduced us to," Eddy noted. "is it Flutters?"

"No."

"Rainy?"

"Leon, you can't call Rainbow Dash that! And no again!"

"She doesn't have to know."

"Twily?"

"Stop guessing! She'll be here any-"

Another player joined the game. Leon looked at the name; Metamorphia.

"Who's that?"

"Oh, hello," a young female voice said quietly. "I hope I'm in the right place...? I'm sort of new to this whole computer thing."

"Gentlemen and Gentlecolt, meet Metamorphia, one of the Changelings that have been included in the cultural exchange."

Several seconds passed in silence.

"I know it's unexpected," Luna continued, "but I've decided to really kickstart the exchange by giving one of the foreign student, such as they are, a chance in one of our livestreams. I think it's a good idea, and will help break the ice."

"Are you sure-"

"Yes, I am sure that I'm not mind controlled or replaced, Shining Armor," Luna said with a hint of impatience, as though they'd gone through this before. "We have Guards checking everypony who enters the palace. I've had Guards check me, and I've had them check Metamorphia before we started playing. What else would you have me do?"

"Sorry, Your Highness," Shining replied, sounding a little now sheepish. "It's my-"

"I know," Luna answered, more calmly than before. "Now, without any further ado, I'd like to introduce Metamorphia. She's travelled a long way to be here, and has studied computer technology intensely in order to be part of this livestream, which I'll be starting in a few minutes."

"Hi," Leon said.

"Heya," Eddy said.

"Oh, hello." The changeling sounded like a normal Equestrian mare, without any accent or hissing that could give her away. "I'm glad to be here."

"We're glad you're here as well," Luna replied. "Do you understand how to play the game?"

"Yes. I mean, I've watched your livestreams and other videos, some made by ponies and others, rather more, by humans. I think I have a general idea of what to do."

"Brilliant! Now, to avoid insults and abuse in the comments, I'll refrain from actively identifying you as a changeling, though your name might give it away. I advise you all to simply not answer any such questions."

"Oh, alright. I hope the ideas they get from the fandom don't influence their opinion of me, or of my race in particular."

"I can't make promises," Luna said ruefully. "I can't control people who live in another world, and I can't force ponies and others in our own to believe anything they absolutely refuse to believe. However, I promise to protect your identity as much as possible. As for the livestream..." Luna was quiet for a moment; her hoof clopped as it struck something, followed by some muffled muttering. "Alright, we are live in three, two, one... Greetings, esteemed viewers. I am Princess Luna, playing Victoria 2 again with Leon, Edward, Shining Armor, and a new guest player, Metamorphia."

"'Ey, blokes," Eddy said in greeting.

"In this series, we'll be playing as nations that have stakes in crisis situations; Greece, Romania, and others of their ilk. The goal is simple; take as many of our cores from the AI, either through war or by initiating crises. Edward is Greece, Leon is Romania, Shining is Egypt, I am Serbia, and Metamorphia... actually, Meta, if I may call you that, I don't think you've chosen a country yet."

"I'll be... Mexico?"

"Eh, technically, they can get a crisis going," Shining said, "But the USA accepts Mexican culture, so its difficult."

"Perhaps Italy," Luna suggested. "True, they're a great power, but our guest has no experience with actually playing the game, and she may as well play as a country that's not going to be as easy to beat up."

"Thank you, Princess, I'll do that."

"Alright, I think with that settled, we can get started with the game itself."

The game switched to a loading screen briefly, then Leon found himself looking at the infant nation of Romania. It was basically Wallachia and Moldavia combined into a single nation. It began in the Russian sphere of influence, and he sent them an alliance offer immediately, while raising taxes and starting research designed to get more research points. There were plenty of locations where the population were soldiers, and he began recruiting units. The Ottomans would want a slice of his territory - incidentally the only piece touching the ocean - and he wasn't about to let them do that.

"Okay, I think we should all ally each other," Eddy said. "And cooperate as much as possible. This is the bloody Ottoman Empire we'll be up against."

"My war plan is basically to immediately take the rest of my only ocean province away from the Ottoman, mostly with the help of the Russians," Leon replied. "I don't see any harm in that. In fact, it might actually help us."

"So, this is murder-the-Ottoman-Empire mode?" Meta asked.

"Well, they can still exist," Eddy countered. "They're just not allowed to exist within our rightful territory."

"Right. That sounds like we're going to be abusing one country."

"Oh well. Sick man of Europe and all that."

"What if the Russians decide to take stuff that you think belongs to you, Leon?" Luna asked.

"I doubt it. The Russians normally steal Kars and other northern Ottoman states, so they probably won't be taking territory that belongs to me in particular. All that said, I do have a province with one of their cores, so a war with them eventually is almost certain, But I think they'll be more than happy to Rickroll the Ottomans for now. They hate each other."

"I can't fault your logic there, but I'd advise caution. The Russians have more men than the Ottomans, so making them more powerful may be troublesome in the long run."

"It's a risk I'm willing to take. Plus, they usually don't seem to focus on military technology. If I have gas attack and they don't, it's too bad for them."

"Hmm... Well, if we're all ready, I'm going to unpause the game."

No one objected.

"Right. Here we go..."

The time in the game began to move forward. Leon quickly formed an alliance with Russia, which was all too happy - for the moment - to accept. He also switched to a reactionary government. "Not really happy that my reactionary government is anti-military, and I don't think its historical, given how much Romanian land remains outside their current borders."

"Well, what are the other options?" Luna asked.

"I have a pacifist conservative party, and a pro-military liberal party that's also secular - and yeah, I am a most decidedly anti-secular person, so that party is never going to get into power, not if I can help it."

"You realize that a lot of our viewers aren't exactly going to like you for that statement, right?"

"Oh well. I don't have to care about their opinion whatsoever. And if the ACLU want to sue me, this livestream has been started by someone in Equestria and I haven't revealed my last name to anyone out there, so it's not like they can find out who I am."

"Noted, but please remember that this livestream is for fun, not for political messaging."

"RIght." That said, Leon clicked on the Ottoman Empire and checked. While his military was starting to produce units, he knew that the bulk of the war was going to be fought between them and Russia, and that the latter power would be the deciding factor. Britain wasn't yet friendly with the Empire, nor were they allied with them, so it would be safe for the immediate future to declare war. "That said, I'm going to wreck the Ottomans, so if anyone wants in on that..."

"I'm in," Eddy said immediately.

"Alright," Luna replied. "My Serbia is small, and I'll have to grow if I'm going to get any chance of forming Yugoslavia."

"I'm in too," Shining said. "They have a lot of my land, and I want it all back."

"What about me?" Meta asked.

"Er, well, a lot of the stuff you'd want to take from them is stuff we'd want," Eddy said, sounding as if he were scratching his head. "Might be willing to help you against Austria later if you either stay out or just help the war without adding a wargoal."

"Hmmm..."

"I can help you out against Austria, definitely," Leon said. "They have a lot of my cores that aren't also yours."

"I guess its not a totally stupid idea. I'll go for it. So, everyone allies each other and Romania in particular?"

"Yes." A moment later, Leon got several alliance offers, all of which he accepted. A few moments after that, having checked to see if the Russians would follow him - they would - he declared war on the Ottoman Empire, and everyone else joined.

Leon immediately invaded the province right next to him; Luna attacked Southern Serbia, Shining invaded Palestine, Eddy waltzed into Thessalia, and Metamorphia began to attack Crete.

"'What do you guys think of World War Bee?'" Luna quoted from the comments in the livestream. "I'm afraid that, since I do not play EVE Online, I cannot in good conscience render an opinion, even though I have kept up on the events."

"Basically, from what I hear, Goonswarm are getting their backsides handed to them," Leon said. "I don't really play either, but I've tried really hard to understand the mechanics of the game and the wars involved. Apparently, the immediate cause of war was that the Cluster-eff Coalition, or Imperium, led by the Goonswarm Federation corporation, attacked people's assets in lowsec, and a bunch of players and groups banded together and, to everyone's surprise, started to beat them back. Now, five months or so later, the Imperium is mostly down to a small slice of Goonswarm territory, and the Money Badger Coalition has them on the ropes. About time, a lot of people are thinking, for EVE's self-proclaimed bad guys to get what they deserve, though it'll be difficult to wipe them out as an entity, seeing as they were founded off-site. I'm not fond of Goonswarm's hate-filled counter response to the MBC, to be honest."

"I play it," Eddy said. "Not a Goon now but I used to be, ultimately I liked TEST better. Fought with them in the Fountain War and I lost most of my stuff when 6VDT fell. TEST's been conquering stuff from the Goons recently and they're back on the board. I don't play very often, but I've been on a couple times in the past few weeks and I've taken part - a small part, mostly raids - in the war."

"Ultimately, whatever side wins, EVE is going to have - has had - the political balance shift," Luna said. "As will the political balance after this war. If we can each take a province - or most of us - the Ottoman Empire will be weaker and we'll be stronger, though I have my doubts as to whether we'll be able to do this again, as the Ottomans will end up being in someone's - read, 'The British Empire's' - sphere of influence by the time the truce wears off."

"Unless they really don't like them," Leon replied. "If the British vote for one of us in a crisis, their relationship will sour - fast. And if Eddy can get them into the war right now..."

"Hmm? Oh, right, I'm already in their sphere, derp. If they accept my offer of alliance, I might be able to get them in. Of course, since I'm already at war, that might be hard." There was a moment of silence, then an announcement of a Greek-British alliance, followed by the British joining the war. "Fantastic. Blighty said yes."

"Good," Leon replied. "That'll help us, and drive a wedge between Britain and the Empire."

"It might not last, if the British want them in their sphere," Luna said. "If they want them badly enough, they'll get the Ottomans in their sphere; even the Russians might be able to sphere them if they don't end up at war with them constantly."

"We'll take what we can get," Shining answered. "To victory!"

Leon watched as his forces began to capture territory. The enemy's first response wasn't a very smart one; they sent six thousand men to counter invade, which he was easily able to beat.

"Desteapta-te Romane,

din somnul cel de moarte

in care te-adancira

barbarii de tiranii

barbarii de tiranii!"

"Nice, where's that from?" Shining asked.

"Romanian national anthem," Leon answered. "'Awaken Thee, Romanian/ from the deathly sleep/into which you've been sunk/by barbaric tyrants!'"

"Sounds... rebellious."

"Yep. From what I've heard, it's inspired by Romania's history of angry peasant revolts, and when the Romanian dictatorship was being overthrown in 1989, people were singing it as they battled government forces in the streets. Not that the army remained loyal to the government for long..." Leon continued to watch as the war continued, and his forces won more ground, along with his allies.

"'What are some current events in Equestria?'" Luna read. "You'd think people didn't know how to buy a newspaper anymore. Or how to look up things on the internet, which spans both worlds these days." She said this without heat, and in a joking sort of manner.

"it's not every day that people get the news directly from a princess, either," Leon pointed out. "Or get their news straight from the horse's mouth, pun intended."

"I suppose not," Luna replied, chuckling. "We've had some trouble with a bandit group in the south that has been harassing the railroads and roads there. Appleloosa and Dodge Junction have been suffering because of it. Fortunately, we're sending an army to wipe out the bandits, through any means necessary, though we're hoping to talk them into surrender rather than have to fight them. Changeling scares are also on the rise, and there are a number of ponies who think that my sister and I are mind controlled simply because we're trying for a peaceful approach and cooperation over military fiat." Luna breathed heavily. "Two changelings who were unmasked in Manehattan were savaged yesterday, by ponies unknown, and nopony is coming forward with information regarding the attackers."

"That's... That's monstrous!" Meta said angrily.

"It is," Luna replied, with a hint, or more than a hint, of fury in her voice. "The police were notified, and took the changelings into custody as well, instead of looking for the attackers. It took a doctor who happened to see them to convince the police that they needed treatment in order for them to receive it. Celestia and I at once sent an order that they be released and that the attackers be caught, detained, and punished under the law."

"Were they doing anything suspicious?" Leon asked.

"The changelings? No; as far as we're aware, they were just performing usual, non-threatening operations. Somehow, they ended up being caught and beaten by a mob. If you humans think that Equestria is a perfect place and that we're without flaw or sin, this is the proof otherwise."

Leon kept an eye on the Ottomans as his army continued to capture territory. "I hope you get the justice you intend. That can't just be allowed to go on."

"it won't. We will capture all of those responsible, and we won't stop searching until all of them are behind bars and ready for a trial... which probably won't last long, considering the evidence we've got."

The various armies invading the Ottomans continued their march. While the enemy was starting to throw greater forces into the fight, the Russians were crushing the Empire in the north, while the British invaded from southern directions. The momentum was building.

"Hey, Leon!" Shining said.

"What?"

"You're the historian of the group. Is it true that the guy who inspired the whole vampire thing and Dracula was based in Romania?"

"Yes. Yes, he was. The man known to history as Vlad the Impaler."

"Ugh. I'd heard about the whole thing, and just wanted to know."

"Which provides me a chance to explain something. To the world at large, and especially Hungarians and Turks, Vlad, or Dracula, was a villain. To Romanians, however, he's a hero who defended them from the Ottomans and the Hungarians. It depends on your point of view. Personally, I am just as disgusted by impaling as the next person, but Romanians have a different opinion on the villain, whom they consider a hero."

"It's something worth considering," Luna admitted. "Both sides in a conflict have their heroes, whom the other side will, whether or not it's true, will consider villains."

Leon continued to keep his eye on the war. A large Ottoman stack, for whatever reason, had decided to go west rather than fight the Russians. "Guys, look out, big stack coming here."

"Oh, I see it," Eddy confirmed. "Thirty six thousand. Ouch. Why couldn't this one go up against the Russians, die horribly, and just let us win the war?"

"Because empires tend to not give up power easily, and Ottomans hate losing land."

"But we're just trying to make the Sick Man of Europe well again," Eddy protested. "They got too big from eating so many countries, so we're trying to correct the balance before they get to a critical condition."

Leon laughed. "Yeah. I guess. But their immune system is trying to boot us out."

"Well, then, we'll just have to turn their immune system off until we're done."

Leon stayed on an occupied province until he realize that the enemy army was heading westward. "Luna, it's coming your way."

"Wait, what? I thought they'd head for the state you're trying to capture!"

"Well, technically, since you added a wargoal, that means that if you're occupying at least 75% of it, it adds to the ticking warscore, so either is a valid target," Eddy said.

"Oh. Right, this isn't Crusader Kings 2 or Europa. What's the plan, then?"

"Everyone surround and bum rush him while he's trying to retake things," Leon said. "And get your best generals. I didn't roll well with mine."

"I can't make up there in time," Shining said. "I'm busy trying to capture things."

"I'm still some distance away," Meta said. "I'll do what I can, but the battle's going to be over before I get there."

He watched as the Serbian, Romanian, and Greek armies got into position. His army was the biggest of the three. at 21,000 men in 7 brigades; Luna had managed to scrape up 3 brigades of 9,000, Eddy 6 of 18,000, to total 48,000 in all. Even though they had 12,000 more men than the enemy, Leon wasn't sure which way the fight was going to go.

"He's retaking too fast," Luna said. "He might begin moving away before we can attack."

"I'll catch him," Leon said. "My general is terrible at combat, but he's got ten percent higher speed."

"Okay then," Luna said. "Let's go."

Leon sent his army to attack the enemy stack; Luna and Eddy sent their armies as well, and the battle began in earnest. To Leon's relief, the Ottomans didn't do too well once the battle began, and when he checked he realized that it was due to a low level of military technology. Still, there were a lot of them, and it took several days for them to retreat. The enemy force was knocked down to about half the strength it had been.

"Follow them!" Luna commanded. "Let's crush that army out of existence!"

The allied armies followed. The enemy army was hit again, and suffered even more damage; it was down to about seven thousand men out of the original thirty six thousand.

"Again!"

They followed the enemy again, and this time, the enemy stack was wiped out.

"Yes!" Eddy almost shouted. "He's done for."

"Hopefully, the major powers will end the war soon," Luna said. "My economy is doing quite poorly at the moment, and my army is having trouble reinforcing."

"Mine too," Eddy agreed. "On the other hand, we have 70% warscore by now. Wish this game had achievements; something like 'Dismantle the Ottoman Empire' would be nice."

"I like getting achievements too," Luna said, "but they're not as important as you'd believe."

"But they show people that I'm better than them!"

"You got half of your Steam achievements with our help, and even more on Xbox; how are you better than anyone else!?" Leon asked.

"Because I have those achievements and they don't?"

Leon rolled his eyes as Luna said, "That'll be enough. Let's just focus on winning the war."

"Um... we've won already, Luna."

"Wait, what?"

"They gave up while we were talking."

It was true. The British, the war leaders, had made an offer that the Ottomans had accepted. Leon had gotten his state, as had Eddy and Shining. Luna got Southern Serbia.

"Looks like they threw the Russians under the bus in order to take Kuwait, or whatever it's called," Shining noted.

"Yeah, they did. I don't think they'd be happy if this were real life."

"Either way, I think we might have busted the idea of a British-Ottoman alliance," Meta said. "We won't have to worry too much about that. And now for Austria..."

"I'll join in on that," Leon replied. "But my army suffered a lot of casualties and I have to concentrate on getting more soldier pops to refill the gaps and get more units."

"I think that's the problem for most of us, Meta," Luna added. "Small nations have this problem."

"Oh, okay. Maybe in a couple years?"

"Yes, I think we can meet that timeline," Luna said. "Keep careful watch on the alliances, though. Austria will definitely ally somebody. Since they usually get into a ton of wars against Prussia, and, later, the North German Confederation, I think we should wait until they're fighting against them before we hit the Austrians."

"Ought to build up a bit of gold in our coffers and factories in our lands before we go to war again," Ed advised.

"Indeed. We have much to do and get started on. As good as the recent war went, we need to actually use what we've taken."

"Railroads," Leon deadpanned.

"Well, that's just one thing we have to do. Factories, research, handling revolt risk-"

"What handling? Rebels are overpowered after 1900."

"Well, I can't deny that. The Communists in particular are bothersome," Luna admitted, and Leon could almost see her rolling her eyes. "And its annoying that rebels in colonies are political rather than nationalist in nature. Still there are ways to help keep rebellion risk down, at least for a while. One is to not take decisions that anger the lower class, because they're always the majority population."

"But how do we get them to be more conservative and less socialist?" Eddy asked.

"I'm not sure. You can tilt the way the voting works by encouraging party loyalty in an area, but not the ideology. There's probably a way, but if there is, I haven't heard of it yet."

"I wish there was away to ban parties that participate in a rebellion," Leon said. "If Communists rebelled, you ought be able to ban the Communist party, at least for a set number of years, once all the rebels are dead."

"Unfortunately, that hasn't happened yet, and I doubt it will. This game is considered old, and it only has two major DLC packs, compared to Crusader Kings 2 and Europa Universalis IV."

Leon grunted unhappily.

"And I must add that banning a political party does not generally get rid of it," Luna added. "They just go underground."

"Yeah, but I ought to be able to do something to keep rebels from spawning every half-year other than giving in to them."

"I understand. Believe me, there are some political factions that I would love to ban if they only gave us the chance."

Leon found himself interested. "Oh?"

"Equestria does have a number of political... maybe not parties, the way you Americans and Britons know it, but there are supremacists of each three kind of pony, and there are groups that believe that Equestria should be for ponies, and ponies only. In other words, donkeys, griffons, and other species should be kicked out."

"I bet that doesn't make headlines," Eddy said.

"We try to ignore them; if people don't know about them, it makes it harder for any actions they may take to have any hold on the country. And, even though they exist, these extremists are of a very small number. They don't have the numbers to be particularly dangerous, not politically. And before anyone asks, yes, we have security keeping tabs on them just in case."

"You bet we do," Shining put in. "We've arrested a few ponies for subversive activities... which included robbery and extortion aimed at gaining money for their factions."

"'What do ponies use to travel when on Earth?'" Luna read off the comments. "Our own hooves, of course, some bare-hooved, others with horseshoes - yes, nailed on - as well as normal commercial transport, to include airlines, trains, and buses, and, for pegasi and the few alicorns that exist, our wings. We have trouble fitting into cars considering our size and the shape of our bodies, but it's not impossible. And another comment deleted," Luna added, much drier this time. "Do not ask whether we will ride in horse trailers or any similar question designed to insult. We wouldn't ask humans whether they'd like to stay in cages, or to live in a barn."

"Except for Applejack, whose barn is a house," Leon said.

"Well... yes, but in any case, comment deleted. Do not ask things with the intent to be insulting."

Leon watched and waited as railroads began to build, little by little. His army wasn't that badly off, though the soldier pops they'd come from were mostly red or yellow. "One good thing playing Romania, you don't have to go to war with the Middle East to get oil."

"What makes you say that?" Shining asked.

"Romania was Germany's primary source of oil for World War II," Leon responded. "And I know because oil pops up here later in the game. I'm going to try to milk that for all its worth."

"In the meantime...?"

"In the meantime, I get ready for the next war."

"Um-hmm."

"We'll have to wrap this up in a few minutes, sadly," Luna said. "I have to raise the moon, and then there will be Night Court to deal with."

"Ain't that always the way?" Eddy asked.

"I'm hardly enamored with the situation," the Lunar Princess replied. "But I do have responsibilities to take care of."

"And Cadence needs me to watch over Flurry Heart," Shining put in. "She's going to negotiate with the Yak ambassador and she needs somepony to take care of our child."

"Alright," Leon said, though reluctantly. "You guys should really tell us these things before the session, though."

"I will next time, I promise," Luna said.

"Good."

Factories and railroads continued to build. Leon didn't build many forts, but he did place one in his capital, just to make that in particular more difficult to besiege. It was always annoying when your capital was taken. As he waited, he took a good look at the world. "CSA is dead, as usual," Leon noted.

"They're dead because they can't get anyone on their side," Eddy pointed out. "They usually only win in the 1836 start if you made all your new states slave states and fill your military with Dixie units, and of course if you choose to play as them."

"Which I never will," Leon said. "I'm a Unionist, thank you very much."

"And China's own civil war is long since over," Luna said. "Do the Heavenly Kingdom ever win?"

"They can, if you're playing them. But even if they win, they don't get cores on everything like the Chinese Empire does, and the Chinese substates don't give them their allegiance. They have to deal with massive infamy penalties in order to conquer all of China to make it remotely feasible to unite them. If the Chinese Empire gets a revolution and loses its substates, on the other hand, it can just declare war at any time and eat them."

"I see."

"Oh, the NGF just declared war on France!" Eddy yelled. "Here we go!"

"I can take the Papal States now, right?" Meta asked.

"You will next time," Luna said. "For now, it's time to go."

"Awwww!"

"Don't worry, we'll continue another time. May everyone here have a good night!"

With that, the game for the night ended. Leon leaned back in his seat, remembering the more juicy bits of the evening...

Battlefield 1, game 1; Operations (part 1)

Leon turned on his Xbox One, a relatively new console for him (he had only had it for a couple of months) and waited for it to start up.

Why does it feel that they based the main screen for this off of Windows 8 or 10? I feel like they tried to combine the PC with a console. Not to mention they actually have games like Kerbal Space Program and Xcom 2 on here as well, formerly PC only releases. Feels weird, even two months later. Not that I'm complaining or anything, I'm just not used to it...

Leon decided to check out his base in Battle Ages while he waited to get invited. When the game loaded, he checked his Medieval settlement out. He was ready to upgrade, more or less, to the Renaissance Era, though that would take a couple days; upgrades for buildings took longer and got more expensive as the game went on. At the least it was a well defended base, with walls protecting turrets, which protected other buildings that did not have walls but were placed in close proximity to the defenses.

Why would so many people not build walls? I know it might take a while and a lot of money to upgrade them, but it's worth it, because if a unit is wasting time attacking a wall, that's more time for defenses to kill them. And even if they get through, the survivors won't number as many as they would otherwise and they'll do less damage less quickly, and they'll be easy pickings for other defenses they come into range of later.

As he looked at his walls and wondered what improvements he could make to his village, the invite, from Luna, came in. he accepted.

"Greetings, Leon," Luna said when he'd joined.

"Hi," Leon replied. "You guys ready for this?"

"I think so. I hope the new console is working for you?"

"Eh, a few things I'm still not used to yet, and not every Xbox 360 game is compatible, so no more Civ Rev**** or Dynasty Warriors 8 - vanilla, that is, they do have an Empires version of it out - but overall, it's pretty decent."

"That was my impression to. A pity some of the older games aren't compatible with the Xbox One, at least not yet, but overall it seems alright."

"Hopefully the mods on this version of Roblox don't ban everyone in sight for the slightest of infractions, if any," Eddy said. "Also hope KSP works faster on here, like World of Tanks does."

"I am concerned by the fact that the games have to effectively download," Leon said. "I have to limit the number of games I can play just to have room on storage, instead of just being able to pop the disk in and not have to worry about storage much, if at all. Halo 5, Xcom 2, World of Tanks, Battlefield 1, and a couple others take up most of my storage space. I know I can just go out and buy some attachment that gives me more memory, but I'm not sure how well the storage spaces will link up or how the data will be stored."

"I'm sure you don't need to worry that badly, Leon," Luna reassured him. "Regardless of the possible problems, I think this experience will go quite well, if we keep our heads."

"Okay, I'll try to stop worrying," Leon said, attempting to do just that. He was mostly successful, but not entirely. "So, Iron Walls operation, or what?"

"Yes, I think that would be a good match up. 64 player game?"

"Yep. More people, more opportunity for kills."

"That applies to us as well, you know."

"Yeah, well... anyway, hopefully we end up on the Austro-Hungarian side; I'm hoping to get into one of the fortress guns."

"Assuming someone doesn't decide that if they can't have it, no one can and stands in front of the guns to make you blow yourself up."*

"Ugh," Eddy said, and Leon could almost feel him roll his eyes. "The entitlement mentality that makes people think they have a right to something even though someone else got to it first, fair and square. Makes me wish that teamkilling was possible. Those fort guns can survive more than one shot triggered from a 'friendly' player. One shot and they'd go flying down the mountainside."

"And you'd be the one being reported for unsporting play," Luna noted. "I detest such bad sportsponyship, but I don't see what we can do other than report the players responsible and then move on."

"I want to do more. I want these self-entitled guys banned."

"Edward, I understand and share your concerns and anger, but it's happened, and reporting and blocking them is the best we can hope for, aside from writing Xbox.com a detailed report of the incident, but I doubt it would accomplish much. In any case, we have a new game to play and a new experience. I ask that you focus on the here and now."

Eddy sighed. "Alright."

As the screen changed and the game began ticking off the "looking for a game" and "matching your skill" points, Luna went on, "I do have a question about the campaign. During the Gallipoli campaign, Bishop makes a reference to Kiwis in one cutscene. I'm not sure what that means."

"You mean where Bishop asks Foster, 'Not a Kiwi, are you'?" Leon asked.

"Yes, exactly."

"That's a slang term for a New Zealander. If i understand it right, it's not considered derogatory and is more or less an example of ribbing between Australia and their smaller brother off to the southeast."

"Ah, so it's just a joke without offensive intent."

"Yeah. It's kind of like how "Aussie" is used to refer to Australians. It's also not harmful. And even New Zealanders refer to themselves as Kiwis."

"Speaking of which, where did the term originate, anyway?"

"Until I looked it up, I thought it was a fruit," Eddy said. "Turns out, it's some sort of flightless bird native to New Zealand."

"Well it does refer to a fruit," Leon replied. "Kiwifruit, to be exact. But I think the fruit can grow places other than New Zealand, so the bird would probably be more a New Zealand thing than the fruit."

"Oh, hold on," Luna said as the count down stopped. "Rarity is joining the party, along with one of my own Lunar Guard, Blazing Star... oh, and Rainbow Dash."

"Rarity? Really?" Leon said, surprised.

"I know. I was surprised as well. Apparently she has other interests than fabrics and mystery novels."

"And the Lunar Guard is a bat pony, I expect?" Eddy asked.

"We prefer the term thestrals," said a new voice. Leon checked real fast; a player called "Night's Glory" had joined the party.

"Greetings, Blazing Star," Luna said. "Welcome to tonight's session of Battlefield 1."

"Thank you, your Royal Highness. It is good to be here."

"I'm assuming you are using a modified controller for pony hooves?" Leon asked.

"He is," Luna confirmed, "as does every other pony, except those unicorns who feel their magic is ample enough to be able to wield human controllers with their magic. They're bigger than the standard controller, but usable without requiring any changes, magical or otherwise, to our bodies."

"Hopefully, they're more durable; pony hooves are as hard as rock."

"They are, don't worry about that."

"Hiya," Rainbow said as she joined. "Here to kick some tail!"

"Greetings, all," Rarity said, joining the party. "Sorry I'm late, had to finish an order for a customer."

"Understandable," Luna said politely. "Don't fear, we haven't been waiting long."

"Although some of us have been wondering why the fashionista who loves clothes and everything fashion suddenly has interest in a mud and blood first person shooter," Eddy injected.

"Even though I love the aforementioned things, I do have some measure of interest in other fields. While the show might not reveal it, some of the mystery novels I read do feature dark and sometimes violent themes. While our world might seem peaceful at an outside glance, we do have our tussles and political and military problems."

"Well, alright."

"Just so you know," the white unicorn went on, "I've played this for about a month, and have reached level five as a scout, and level three and four in other classes, so don't expect me to be surprised by much."

Okay, so this isn't just a drop in and see how things goes kind of deal, Leon thought. Okay...

"Anyway," Luna said, "we're playing operations on Iron Walls. I will set up a private squad for us when we get to the map. Is anyone going to make a dash for a vehicle?"

"I might go for a tank," Eddy said. "If not, I'll probably spawn in as an Assault class."

"Same here. I might make a run for the fortress gun if we spawn in as Austrians and we lose the San Rocco Church early on," Leon said.

"Just be ready in case a troll comes up and tries to make you destroy yourself with your own cannons," Luna warned. "We're going into a public match, and I won't have control of the server, so I won't be able to ban anyone."

"I might try for an airplane," Blazing Star said. "I like flying."

"Me too," Rainbow stated. "I want an attack plane; kills stuff in the air or on the ground."

"Just be careful; the planes in this game will crash and burn if they even brush against anything," Leon warned.

"Oh, believe me, I've learned that in this game... painfully learned," Blazing Star said.

"I'll probably pass," Rarity said. "Only the Light Tank might catch my eye, and I want my Martini-Henry."

As the game began to load, Leon asked, "So, Blazing-"

"Oh, please, call me Blaze, or Star."

"Ok, Blaze, what's it like being a, thestral? I heard from some of Luna's other Guards that you guys sleep all day."

"Well, most of us do. For us, the night is like the day. We can see very well at night, whereas it's harder for us to see in bright sunlight. But a few of us are kept active to keep Her Royal Highness safe, even during daylight hours. We stay in the shadows even so, keeping out of sight but still keeping her well defended."

"Yes, we are on the Austrian side!" Leon cheered.

"Shhh, I want to listen to the German speech," Luna said.

After the German voiceover for the map ceased, Eddy asked, "Do you understand German?"

"Yes. Also French and Italian, with some Spanish. Anyways, we have a minute before this all kicks off, so please continue to explain what thestral life is like, Blaze."

"Yes, Your Highness."

"Do you guys eat anything other than veggies?" Eddy asked.

"Well... our diet is largely vegetarian."

"Does largely mean, 'yes', or..."

"A little."

"So a McDonald's Whopper or Wendy's burger wouldn't be out of the question for you?" Leon asked.

"Oh, please don't start," Blaze groaned. "You'll just start me salivating. I love those things. I mean, uhhh..."

"My Guards do not eat other species that are sentient, or sapient, as some might say," Luna put in. "They do have a mild taste for meat, but as Blaze said, thestrals are largely vegetarian; most of their diet is made of fruits and vegetables. In recent years, as such non-sentient meat has become available, they have increased their intake of meat products, and they are somewhat more commonly seen at fast food restaurants at night, particularly restaurants that originated on Earth, where they don't feel discriminated against by the store employees and managers. Sadly, thestrals suffer from myths told about them, such as being able to turn other ponies into them with their bites and eating other ponies, which further drives them away from many of their fellow Equestrians, the different waking hours not withstanding. Interestingly enough, they usually get along well with visiting humans, many of whom like staying up late at night and have not gone through a lifetime of lies told about thestrals. In fact, many of them consider thestrals to be cute, especially the foals."

"I had to stop one visitor from picking up and hugging my daughter," Blaze said. "Apparently, a human girl thought she was adorable, which is insulting to a people who have long been loyal and strong warriors of the night."

Leon sniggered. Eddy and Rainbow guffawed. Even Luna chuckled for a moment. Rarity giggled.

"What?"

"Never mind, Blaze," Luna answered. "And I think the game is starting, so let's focus on that."

Leon immediately joined Butter Squad, which Luna had created, and then choose the Assault class, armed with an M1918 Automatico Storm, AT Rocket Gun, Incendiary grenade, and Shovel, as well as a Howdah Pistol (which Leon had nicknamed "The Howdy Pistol", with a southern/western accent being part of the name) as a secondary firearm. He selected to spawn in the Church that was the initial sector objective. Rarity, Rainbow, and Blaze had joined Charlie Squad, which Rainbow had started.

"Right, so is there a plan?"

"Considering that we're in a random game where at least some people aren't interested in acting as a team, I'd say any plan between us would necessarily have limited effect on the battlefield," Leon murmured. "I'll try and hold the Church."

"I'll hold back and try to pick off the other team with my carbine," Rarity proposed.

"I managed to snag an Attack Plane; I can cover you guys from the air," Blaze responded.

"Me too," Rainbow said. "I'll watch your backs."

"Which leaves me and Edward," Luna said. "I think I'll spawn in as a Support class and cover the Church with my mortar. Please try to keep the enemy off me."

"And I'm with Leo," Eddy said. "Right, that's settled."

"Assuming we don't get overrun in minutes," Leon said, "we might be able to hold back the first battalion they send, but I think the airship they'd get as a result would kick us out."

"I've played this map before, the Church usually gets rushed and captured early on," Eddy said. "Hopefully, we can hold here for a while and knock out their number of spawns, but I'd recommend being ready to fall back by the time they're down to 200 lives in their first battalion."

The timer began to countdown. Leon went from an overhead view of the battlefield - and, presumably, so did everyone else - to a first person view.

4... 3... 2... 1...

The battle began.

Rainbow turned her plane slightly to the left as the fighting began and her friends on the ground began making for San Rocco Church. "Okay guys, any options?"

"Yeah," Eddy said. "Interdict their reinforcements. Bomb the area west of the church, and the western wall; a bunch of them will probably be trying to hug the wall there."

"Copy. Making my run."

The attack plane flew in as low as Rainbow could make it do so without crashing into the church steeple. She unleashed her bombs just after the plane passed it. A very satisfying clunking noise, followed by hundreds of points and two kills, followed.

"Aw yeah, nice!"

"Fangs out!" Blaze said. A moment later, he added, "Yes, got two of them cowering in that trench just east of the church!"

"Heh heh!"

"Look out!"

Rainbow bit back a curse as an enemy attack plane dived in from the rear and poured a hail of fire in to her plane, doing 34 points of damage and disabling it. "Dang it; cover me while I repair, Blaze!"

"Got it. He's in my sights. Get out and repair while you can, Dash."

Leon shot down two Italian soldiers trying to enter the church from the front with the Automatico. "Easy so far."

"Not for long it isn't," Eddy warned. "Artillery truck incoming."

"Uh oh. Anything else we should know about?"

"Yep; Landship coming with it."

"Drat. I'm coming out, assuming I don't get shot."

"I'll try and set a trap with good old TNT, maybe I can blow up or disable the landship, that's the priority."

"Got it."

"Hey, Dash, Blaze, that artillery truck is the AA variant; get out of here until we take it out!"

"Oh, crud!"

It was too late. The artillery truck fired, pelting Rainbow's plane with flak shells.

"Urgh, bailing out!"

"Sorry, Rainbow; didn't have time," Leon apologized.

"Just let me get my hooves on that truck! It's going down!"

"Oh yeah, c96 carbine and maybe repair tool vs. AA artillery truck that can kill infantry as well."

"Hey, it's me! you're talkin' to!"

"Just don't die too early. You're fortunate you were able to bail out over a section of land that's not off limits. And we're going to need everyone to help here, we're getting pushed."

It was true. Leon, even lying prone, was being shot at, and enemy soldiers were coming up toward the church in relatively large numbers.

"One... Two... Three," Rarity said, as three corresponding enemy players dropped. "The SMLE Carbine is doing wonders for me so far."

"Watch out for any vengeful players who decide to sneak up and backstab you," Luna cautioned. "Someone tends to try."

"Which is why I've set up a couple of incendiary traps, Princess. Even if they don't kill, by giving me points they'll warn me of hostile activity near my location."

"Well, if you are so determined..."

Leon took out the AT Rocket Gun, aimed at the artillery truck - which was now blasting the church - and fired. The miniature cannon proved it's worth, hitting the enemy vehicle and damaging it. The driver wasn't stupid, and backed behind a rock in order to repair.

"Urgh. He's hiding."

The enemy landship fired it's main guns; each targeted a different area of the church.

"The artillery truck can wait, the landship will tear the building apart."

"I'll do after it with dynamite, Leo, if you keep them off me while I do it."

"I'll cover you. Just go in and blow it up."

Leon pulled out his AT Rocket Gun and shot at the landship. While it failed to destroy the tank, it did damage, and meanwhile gave nearby enemies a flash and a powerful weapon to focus fire on, and hopefully draw their attention away from Ed.

The closest cannon on the landship turned toward him. By that time, Leon had picked himself up and was running. The explosion from the shot that followed did damage, but didn't succeed in killing him. He did have to put on his gas mask; the church was under constant bombardment from gas grenades.

There was a big explosion from outside, followed by a cheer from Eddy. "Got the sucker!"

"Good job!"

"Yep, and... aw, bloody... some guy with a shovel killed me."

"Happens. A lot. Especially in 64 player games. Just spawn back in. There's going to be more where they came from."

Suddenly, an airplane crashed into the church, blowing up as it struck. Fortunately it did no damage, but it did momentarily distract Leon, who was killed by an incendiary grenade.

"Argh."

"Don't mess with the guardians of the night," Blaze said. "Got that bomber that was flying around."

Leon chose not to mention the part that action had played in his recent demise. "Nice. Keep a watch for more agile planes."

"Already on it."

Leon spawned in again, this time as a Scout class with a Gewehr 95 Carbine, similar, indeed almost identical, in function to Rarity's SMLE. He caught to her, went prone, and began shooting. Two enemy soldiers went down quickly.

"Ah, good to have company," Rarity commented.

Leon blasted another Italian trooper. "Yeah, well, let's just keep them off the church if we can."

"I know, darling." Bang! "Got one."

Both continued sniping enemy players, trying to keep the enemy from entering the church and capturing the flag.

Blaze watched as another enemy bomber began to approach the church. The flags naturally drew players from both sides, so a bombing run against a flag could bring big results.

Not if I can help it. He approached the bomber, firing away with the attack plane's cannon.

This bomber, as it turned out, had a rear gunner, who shot back. Bullets began to hit, and the plane took damage. However, he hadn't found the range in time; the bomber pilot bailed out, leaving the plane without a guiding hand. Apparently, the gunner didn't notice, because when the bomber blew up and began to fall out of the sky, Blaze had picked up a kill on top of nailing the bomber.

Still, more infantry attacked, and they would be key to taking the flag. Blaze turned his plane around and shot up a couple of infantry making their way toward the church.

Some of the enemy infantry didn't take kindly to that. They didn't take kindly to it at all. Some of them began shooting at him. Blaze was inclined to scoff... until the plane's symbol suddenly turned red, and the vehicle became that much harder to control.

"Go n-ithe an tochas thú!"** Blaze snarled in Gaelic. Now he would have to pull out of combat in order to repair.

Unfortunately, an enemy pilot wasn't willing to give him that respite. A fighter came in from the rear - where else did attacking aircraft come from? - and began shooting at once. The plane took additional damage, and it all began to rack up fast.

"Blast it!" Blaze did the prudent thing and bailed out... moment's before the plane exploded. The enemy fighter tried to ram him while he was in his parachute, but failed, and Blaze made it safely to the ground.

"Right, so now just-"

He got no further. An enemy scout who had been rather quick for the matter had gotten a headshot on him, and his ccharacter dropped to the ground.

"Ugh, drat!"

"Well, that sucked," Rainbow commented.

"At least there's a tank available. I'm taking it. Anyone coming?"

"Yeah, hold on." Rainbow shot down an over eager enemy Assault. "Alright, let's go."

At this point, the flag counter began to run down from friendly blue, and it was doing so quickly.

"Oh, bother," Rarity remarked. "It appears some of the blackguards actually got past us."

"We're losing the flag," Eddy warned.

"I see it," Leon replied. "It's falling fast, and I don't think we'll be able to stop it, so I'm going for the fortress gun."

"Fine. Just make sure to hit their tanks if you can."

"It's not exactly like aiming and firing a Dreadnought's cannons or a mortar, but I'll try."

Leon was able to make it to the gun without being shot at, at least not to his knowledge. Unless his team lost the two flags in the valley below, the enemy wouldn't be able get inside the bunker, as it was, for the attacking team's infantry and for the moment, out of bounds. Anyone who tried to follow him, besides members of his own team, would be killed for "deserting."

Of course, there were still planes, tanks, and artillery trucks...

So I deal with them before they can deal with me.

Leon descended into the bunker and entered the fortress gun, just as one would enter a vehicle or mount a horse. As he'd said to Ed, it wasn't like operating the Dreadnought or a mortar at all; the minimap provided no help regarding where the shells would land, and given the shell drop, sometimes he'd have to raise his view above the target, such as a tank, in order for the guns to have a chance to hit it.

A group of infantry were closing in on the flag closest to the gun. Out of range of most retaliation - for the moment, anyway - he quickly aimed, guessed roughly where the shells would land, and pulled the trigger.

The twin guns roared, the shells flew... and blew up three enemy infantry who had had the misfortune to be running close together, plus doing damage to others who weren't killed, and getting a couple of kill assists a moment later.

"Chalk up three."

"Not bad," Luna said. "I'd advise everyone to stay somewhere near the flag closest to the mountains, which is a bit easier for Leon to defend."

"That's not difficult, I'm already there," Rarity answered.

"Currently rampaging around in an FT-17, be right there," Blaze replied. "I'm hoping I can get the sniper that killed me."

"Probably not going to happen," Luna deadpanned. "He's probably out of your reach. Sink your fangs, and shells, into people that are trying to capture our flags."

"Yes, Princess."

Leon saw an enemy landship moving on the flag. The metal monsters were tough, and could be manned by several players; as a result, the driver could repair the thing while the moving fortress continued to spit fire in every direction.

"Not this time," Leon muttered, putting two giant shells into the beast. That wasn't quite enough to put it out of action, but did succeed in disabling it, leaving it momentarily unable to move and killing someone who had gotten out a moment earlier. Two shells fired by players armed with At Rocket Guns finished the monster off.

"Boom!"

"Don't let it go to your head, Leon. Someone is going to get the idea to come after you eventually."

"Well, they can kiss my Wookie***... I mean, fortress guns. And then explode because of the shells."

"What about when they start bombing you?"

"I'll get them too. I've bagged airplanes in this thing before."

"Ever do it on purpose?"

"...Okay, maybe a few risks here and there."

"Hmm. Rainbow Dash, it's best if you get into another planes as early as possible."

"What do you think I want to do? I'm stuck trying to protect myself here and picking up kits just to survive right now."

"Well, if you die and find an aircraft available, use it. We're going to need the air cover."

"I'll try, but everyone wants a plane."

Leon fired again, this time missing and only getting seven points for damage. "Ugh, come on," he muttered. The next pair of shells succeeded in hitting an artillery truck and blowing it sky high; he wasn't quite sure that it was the same artillery truck that had shot down Rainbow and become a nuisance, but...

"Got an artillery truck. Hopefully that clears the airways a bit."

"Not terrible, I guess."

The next few minutes were sheer mayhem. Leon succeeded in killing an A7V, a second land ship, and another artillery truck, along with numerous infantry. It wasn't even fair; most of the enemy were busy trying to capture the flags, and with Austrian tanks and infantry - along with some planes as well - they had enough to think about as it was, and the big guns were blasting big holes in the landscape.

"Leon, dear, I appreciate the help, but you've destroyed both buildings with your shell fire," Rarity warned.

"At least they can't hide in them."

"No, but neither can we."

"They wouldn't have lasted long anyhow," Luna stated. "Grenades, tanks, and mortars would have turned them into firewood regardless."

"Got another attack plane, finally." Rainbow Dash said. "Gonna bomb everyone into oblivion!"

"There's only fifty of them left," Eddy stated. "Well, forty-nine, now. You'll have to hurry."

"Trust me, I'll get some of them before we're through with this wave."

Leon was momentarily distracted by an enemy bomber that unloaded nearby, missing the fortress gun, but still inflicting some damage. "Might want to get on that. They have a bomber roving around."

"I see him; he's mine!"

Leon continued firing, knocking over a few more infantry trying to capture the flag. "Keep the pressure up! They'll be desperate to take this sector before going down!"

"More tanks!" Eddy yelled.

More vehicles were indeed coming, along with a couple cavalrymen on horseback. Leon watched Luna shoot one of them out of the saddle, while leaving the horse more or less intact. "I probably should have spawned as an Assault, but I'll do what i can can with my mortar," the princess answered. "Leon, we'll need the covering fire."

"Already on it." Leon fired at an A7V, missed, muttered angrily as the guns reloaded, fired again, and this time hit his intended target, disabling it and killing someone in a turret that had been destroyed outright by the blast. Another shot smashed the tank like a sledgehammer, and killed almost everyone who had tried to escape the burning wreck.

It was all well and good, but someone must not have liked being shelled that much, because an artillery truck opened fire, quickly skirting behind the church to take cover. The shot hit the mountain below the turret, but the next struck the fortress gun directly, severely reducing it's health.

"Ungh! Freaking..."

"What's going on?"

"Artillery truck. Taking cover behind the church World of Tanks style and sniping me."

"An interesting choice of action," Luna noted quietly. "Not sure I can do much to take him out, though."

"I'll get him," Rainbow told them. "It's a regular artillery truck, right?"

"Yep," Leon said. "Uh oh-"

CLANG!

"Yeah, not going to be able to hold on here long..."

"I'm on it!"

Rainbow came in, her main guns blazing. The artillery truck would have been difficult to hit with the fortress gun, but for the plane, it was almost a sitting duck. It was disabled and blown up in short order.

"Just seven- no, sixteen left, now," Luna said. "This wave is almost through."

Leon fired yet again, this time only getting one enemy. "At least they didn't get more than the first objective. That makes the rest of the match a lot easier for us."

"It's not over yet, Leon. Even if they fail to capture a flag now, it doesn't mean they can't advance in the next round. Indeed, they can still win not only this map, but the operation as well."

"I know, but it means they have to work harder to achieve the same goal."

"Oh, they'll have to, or else attempt to blitz each objective, which they might do."

The rest of the enemy team's lives were used up pretty quickly. Before long they were at three, then two, then one...

"Got a headshot on that one," Rarity remarked as the camera lifted up and Austrian general began a short speech.

"Just be ready, they'll be coming again, and I don't think you'll be able to pull off the same trick with the fortress gun again, Leon."

"Why... Aw, nuts," Leon muttered as the game informed him that "The enemy is being reinforced with an airship."

Author's Note

* This happened to me :twilightangry2: Some guy (I won't say the gamertag, for fear of people waging retribution against this guy and because of possible banning here for naming and shaming someone off-site) either wanted me to leave the gun so he could have it, or he was trying to make me kill myself. Either way, he was standing in from of the gun and kept shifting so that at least one shell would blow up against his body, not harming him at all (:rainbowhuh:) while doing some twenty points of damage to the turret. Suffice it to say I was enraged. While I was reporting him (and messaging him, ordering him to cease the activity), I ended up dying from enemy actions :flutterrage:

** "May you be eaten by an awful itch!" I decided that a warrior culture in MLP, say the Thestrals, might have their own language, and decided to roll the dice here, especially since the Gallic Wars of Caesar (and the Celtic culture as well) have taken my fancy somewhat lately regarding history. Romanian might be more appropriate, and I might change it to that effect later on, but for now my interest is in the Gallic Wars and Rome.

***Star Wars reference, from the novel The Courtship of Princess Leia, where Han says this to an Imperial Admiral... twice. As always, no sexual jokes allowed.

****Civilization Revolution is actually available now as a backwards compatible game, though it wasn't when I first started typing this chapter.

This will be a three-part chapter for the three waves in Operations that the attackers get. I felt that anyone who likes this story has been waiting long enough, and I want to feel more active here.

The fighting over the church is NOT intended to be an insult to religion. Unfortunately, it's where the first objective is located on the actual map. :ajsleepy: Otherwise, this is my favorite Operations map, though Oil of Empires is decent, too.

I apologize for the time taken to get this out. Video games (including Rome 2 and Total War; Warhammer), along with writer's block, procrastination, and simply working on another story got in the way.

I also apologize to any New Zealanders and Australians if I'm wrong about the Kiwi thing. I thought it was interesting and wanted to point it out to anyone who didn't get it (though it confused me too, come to that).

May God go with you all :twilightsmile:

Battlefield 1, Game 1 (part 2); Pushed back

"Right, second wave incoming," Leon murmured. "Okay, anyone have plans to use an airplane that does not involve crashing into the airship?"

"Har har," Rainbow deadpanned. "We'll wing it."

Leon switched to an attack plane. "We'll see how this goes, I guess," he said.

"I've got one of the other planes," Rainbow stated.

"Hey, where does that leave me?" Blazing Star asked. "Someone else took the last plane."

"I suppose you'll have to go on hoof - er, I mean foot," Luna answered. "I don't think there are any tanks... no, there aren't."

Blaze sighed. "I'll go out there as an Assault class, then. It would somewhat fit with the Lunar Guard's style, though I'd prefer a rogue class better."

"Well, there isn't," Leon told him. "This is a war game, and stealth isn't really available, at least not in the kind you're talking about. No knives or shinobi here."

"Drat." There was a stomp on the other end.

"Whoa, calm down, buddy. It's not that big a deal," Eddy reasoned.

"No, it wasn't that. One of the nails in the horseshoes I was wearing was coming out, so I stomped on it to get it back in there. I'm going to have a word with my farrier; her shoes seem to come with loose nails for some reason."

"I'm betting one of ours could do better," Leon joked. "I think they'd like dealing with customers who know how to say more words than "neigh" or "whinny."

"Actually, there are a number of human farriers in Equestria," Luna put in. "And most of them do seem to do well at fixing and nailing on horseshoes, along with fulfilling other duties that a blacksmith would otherwise provide. As for the quality of conversation, I cannot say, but if you're thinking of switching, Blaze, I could recommend you to one or two good ones."

"Thanks, Prin- uh, Luna."

"Anytime," she responded.

The timer for the beginning of the new round ran out, and the game began. Leon took control of the plane he was using and began looking for areas of the airship to target. "Might want to bomb the machine guns on the roof," he suggested.

"Yeah, but don't forget the guns underneath," Rainbow returned. "Those are the ones hurting our guys on the ground, and giving their own team time to capture a sector or two. Let's try to make sure that doesn't happen."

"Copy, Red Leader," Leon answered, trying to pronounce the words as they were in the Battle of Yavin in Star Wars 4.

Rainbow laughed. "Not much of a leader, with just one plane taking my orders. I'll see what I can do with you, though. Aim for the control room."

"Understood." Leon did so. The gunners in the airship were firing at the flag near the fortress gun he'd been using the previous round and weren't paying attention to the sky, which was a mistake; his cannons tore the control room to shreds. One of the gun positions was destroyed, along with the gunner who had been manning it.

"One gun down."

"Got one on top," the blue pegasus said. "I think we might be in trouble, if those enemy planes I see are coming after us."

"Yeah, that might not be pleasant." Leon flew under the airship's tail and out into the open air. Without warning, and enemy fighter came down from above and strafed him, passing by just underneath him.

"Ugh!" The enemy pilot had succeeded in disabling the attack plane. Although Leon was still flying, it was not without trouble. "Got disabled."

"Roger. I'll try to keep you covered while you repair."

"Thanks."

It was a difficult task; the controls for steering the plane didn't work while the vehicle was repairing, and that meant that the plane was a sitting duck during the repair period. On the other hand, if he didn't repair, the plane would remain as hard to steer as it was now, not to mention it would still be easy for any enemy pilot or AA gunner to KO.

"One down," Rainbow said. "Might have been the one to shoot ya, but I'm not sure."

"As long as he's not still shooting at me," Leon replied, still trying to fix the attack plane and hoping the enemy would be too distracted by Rainbow to do anything about it.

Luna aimed carefully at the enemy soldier in the green uniform of La Regno d'Italia and used her magic to pull the trigger button. The soldier fell down.

"One down," she murmured.

"Watch out for the medic-" Rarity burst out.

BAM! "Got him," the princess said. "Make that two."

"Bother, I was about to get him," Rarity pouted.

"You'll get your chance soon enough, I dare say," Luna replied. "and besides, he would have revived the first casualty if I hadn't shot him right then."

"I suppose." Rarity's rifle also cracked. "Another one suddenly taking a nap," she observed.

"Indeed. Incoming aircraft."

"Oh, for the love of... better move."

They were able to evacuate their comfortable sniping spot just as an enemy plane dropped it's bombs. Luna was reduced to 65% health, but the bombs had failed to kill her character, nor had they done in Rarity.

"Hopefully Rainbow and the others can cover us," the white unicorn hoped.

"Repaired, no longer disabled, 81% health," Leon stated. "Back in the fight."

The battle continued to swirl around them. Italy continued it's forward momentum, and Luna knew that the current positions weren't going to hold. "Edward, you might want to pull out of that bunker."

"Hey, getting quite few kills as morons keep running down here."

"You'll end up dying if you remain there after they capture both flags, as they are about to do."

"Oh, fine. But it'll be hard- DIE! One of the buggers out of the way at least."

"Get out of there!" Leon said. "Big scary balloon with a ton of firepower overhead, in case you've forgotten!"

"So what? They'll blast me if I leave either way. Better to die fighting and then respawn."

"Whatever. Fine. Don't blame us when the map kills you because the area got taken."

"Worry about the stuff in the air, flyboy."

"If you rage after this, don't say I didn't warn you."

Luna chuckled under her breath, before sighting another target and firing at them. She missed, and reloaded her rifle.

"About our schedule this coming week," Leon began, "I noticed that you're going to be missing for about five days, Luna. What's going on, if I might ask?"

"Oh, I'm sorry for not having cleared that up," Luna said, remembering. "I'm going on a diplomatic visit to Israel."

"That's going to hot news," Leon noted. "Sparks are going to fly."

"Yes, but in any case, I've decided to go myself and see what is going on with my own eyes. I'd had enough of the political wrangling and various biases in the media. We'll see how it goes."

Leon grunted in a very contented way. Not a big surprise, given that he's a staunch conservative, Luna thought. He'd be pro-Israel. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I do worry that he can get too political, though. Politics can be... rather polarizing. I should know, having centuries of experience on the subject.

"Artillery truck!" Rarity said urgently.

"Where?" Leon inquired.

"Right between... ugh, never mind, I'll just use a little magic of my own to knock that thing out."

"What kind of magic?" Luna asked.

"It's called K-bullets."

The white pony proceeded to repeatedly shoot the AT. "Finally," she said, chambering another round. "Got one of the crew."

Just then, Leon flew over the truck, bombing it out of existence.

"Hey!" Rarity shouted. "I was about to finish him off! And where were you when we needed you a minute ago?"

"Trying to not die. A couple of these guys in the giant flying potato have it in for me."

"Given the strafing you gave them initially, I'm not that surprised," Rainbow cut in. "But that thing needs to go. We're getting creamed on the ground."

That was true. The enemy had captured both flags and most of the Austro-Hungarian players who hadn't been killed outright were retreating to the next zone.

"Hmm, that brings them closer to us," Luna noted. "We might want to shift our positions, seeing as they can actually enter our current zone now."

"I suppose," Rarity said reluctantly. "I-"

She was a little too late to move. An Italian sniper had spotted her and gotten a headshot. Luna noticed the position of the enemy sniper and returned the favor, but this was a little late on the draw.

"Ugh," Rarity said, the sound of a hoof striking her head coming through the mic. "I'm going to spawn on your location."

"I'd advise against it, I'm moving and in the open," Luna said. "It might be a good idea to remain split up for a few minutes."

"Well, alright..."

"That's right, keep coming down the stairs, morons," Eddy said, still in the bunker. "I'll kill you all and- Uh oh, out of ammo."

The result was all too predictable.

"Well..."

"Don't. Please, just don't."

Leon watched as a bomber passed by above him. He turned the attack plane upward and began shooting it with the main gun of the aircraft. The heavy shells struck the bomber, which tried to turn so that Leon would miss. The second player in the bomber, who had been manning the forward gun, switched to the back and shot at Leon with the rear machine gun.

The attempts failed. Leon got the kill after some effort, though he was aided by an allied AA gun on the ground, which inflicted some measure of damage on the bomber before it went down.

"Sayonara, buddy," Leon murmured as the bomber fell out of the sky, burning all the way.

"The blimp is down!" Rainbow yelled. "I repeat, the blimp is down!"

Technically speaking, a dirigible was not a blimp; the first had a structure underneath, while the other had only a giant balloon on top of a control cab and engines. Nonetheless, Leon turned. "Oh, it's going to come down right on top of 'em," he said in juicy anticipation.

He felt amused. Several enemy players were too caught up in the combat to look up and were simply crushed from out of nowhere by the falling, burning zeppelin.

Eddy laughed. "Probably the best thing I've seen all day."

Luna laughed too. "I'll admit, it's funny when that happens... to the enemy, anyway."

"And those guns are gone too," Leon went on. "Now we can move a bit more freely, at least on the ground. I'll continue to provide support up here."

"Please do," Luna said. "We'll need it. They got through our first flags and they've taken two of the three flags here already."

"The bunker should hold; it's underground part is close enough to the flag that the guys hiding there can control the flag, and it's not easy at all to dig them out of there," Leon noted. "Of course, it's no picnic in the bunker, either, considering the constant barrage of gas and incendiary grenades they get."

"Believe me, I've experienced it," Rarity noted, sounding distasteful. "I have no idea how the real soldiers in the actual war dealt with it."

"Well, take away 95% of the hand-held automatic weapons, replace them with regular, unmodified bolt action rifles, add more artillery, especially big guns, and more dogfighting and less ground support among the aircraft - oh, and lots and lots of mud and craters - and you've got something not far from the real thing," Leon replied.

"And a ton of dirt everywhere, not to mention barbed wire and nutjob officers telling ya to go over the the top all the time," Eddy added.

"And, from what I hear, constant life in a dirt and mud-filled trench," Luna put in. "Extending from horizon to horizon, with any buildings and trees long since reduced to rubble and ruin."

"Okay, okay, I get the point," Rarity muttered. "What I asked is how they dealt with it."

"You might want to go back in time and ask them," Leon suggested, "because I think only they could tell you." A he said this, he aimed for the flag on top of the hilltop bunker that both sides were struggling for, then thought better of it and turned toward the door that the Italians were pouring grenades into. A number of them were bunched up and apparently had forgotten that they could be bombed from the air. Five of them paid for that mistake, with more points coming in for Leon due to damage inflicted.

"Nice bombing run," Eddy noted.

"Thanks. This bunker, man... It's a chokepoint, just because the guys underground can hold the flag, and even if the flag is temporarily taken, they basically take it right back when the attackers leave. We need to hold it, no matter what."

"No arguments here," Luna agreed. "It might be overpowered, but you're right."

"I'll go," Blaze said. "I'm fine with the conditions in that bunker, and we need to keep it as long as possible."

"Alright then," Luna answered. "Keep it under our control."

"I will."

Blaze shot down two Italians who were trying to enter the bunker via the lower, southern entrance and went in himself. A friendly player fired a couple of shots into him before realizing that he was on their side. These bullets did no damage, but even so, it was irritating. "Fool. I'm on your side. I thought that would be obvious."

"He can't hear you," Luna said. "And what did you expect? It gets crazy in the fortress defenses on Iron Walls, along with the bunkers. People are inclined to shoot first and ask questions, if they have any, later. Besides, friendly fire is off."

"I know, but this is really unprofessional."

"It's a video game. Many of those playing aren't trying to be professional. Most people aren't Lunar Guards, whatever your standards - and, as your Princess, I know them very well - might be. If you're going in the bunker, just defend it as well as you can."

"I will do so to the utmost of my abilities." Blaze ran up the stairs and, once at the top, turned around, made his character lie down and pulled out the AT Rocket Gun. The first Italian through the door he'd just come in through would get a very nasty surprise.

It wasn't long in coming. Someone threw a gas grenade in, but Blaze already had his gas mask on, so it had zero effect. It was followed by an overeager enemy soldier running in, and immediately receiving a rocket to the face, which naturally resulted in an instant kill. In addition, another player who had been coming in behind the first has suffered some damage. Blaze switched from the rocket gun to the MP18 and mowed him down before he could do much.

After that, the enemy wasn't so courageous. Instead of rushing in, they began throwing in grenades, or else using crossbow to try and bounce various grenades up the stairs. The gas grenades basically did nothing, but there were a number of incendiary and impact grenades, and Blaze decided, after suffering 11% damage, to pull back a bit until the barrage stopped.

On the other side of the bunker, it was the same deal; gas and fire were coming in. here and there, an impatient enemy soldier would come running in, only to be gunned down. Occasionally, a defender would be killed, but considering that squadmates kept spawning in, that wasn't too much of a problem yet.

Blaze threw a grenade of his own down the stairs. It caught someone outside and did some damage, though it failed to kill anyone. Another player tried to get in, but was hosed down pretty quickly, though not before hitting Blaze a couple of times.

In spite of the failure of the enemy to get in and stay in, they were keeping the bunker under siege. While the players in the bunker were holding the flag, they weren't able to do much else. The enemy were, however, losing lives in the process. their second battalion was down to 125 lives, and every one they threw away against this bunker was one they wouldn't have further down the line. During the fighting, Blaze moved back and forth between covering each entrance, trying to avoid damage while keeping the enemy out.

Eventually, an enemy player got his hands on a sentry kit, and a massive, heavily armed Arditi came in, clutching a big machine gun. While definitely not invincible, he shot two of the defenders down quickly and wound up shooting a third before switching to his submachine gun, which could be said to be even more powerful, as the same guy sliced down two more defending players. Blaze finally got in a headshot, and brought him down, but now the enemy were swarming the flag from above as other continued to besiege the defenders.

"Leon, we'll need more bombing runs here."

"I've been trying. They're getting creative."

"What do you mean, 'creative'?"

"As in, they brought in a couple AA artillery trucks."

"Oh. That might explain it."

"Yeah, it's a problem."

"Can anyone or any pony else blow them up?"

"Sorry, darling," Rarity answered. "We're also in a spot of bother. They're closing in on us, and it's all I and Luna can do to keep them from doing us in."

"Do you think you can still hold the bunker?" Luna asked.

"I'll try, but they just got a sentry in here killed something like five guys. There might be problems, there's me and maybe four, correction, five, other people still here. If they really rush us, they could take us out and capture the flag for good."

"Hmm. Edward, can you-"

"I'M IN A TANK!"

"All I was going to say was-"

"IN A TANK! Not doing it."

"You're not even the driver," Leon complained. "Basically you're just sitting in a gun position hoping people will obligingly come and get shot down."

"In. A. Tank. Shut up."

"...You really need to learn how to take advice."

"Muted."

"Ugh."

"Just leave him," Luna said, sighing furiously. "Blaze, hold your ground and keep the bunker under our control for as long as possible. Should you die, we'll discuss what to do next."

"Understood. I'll hold the bunker until the end."

"Be sure you do. We need to keep it. Very badly."

Blaze shot down another enemy trooper, but he was starting to run low on ammunition. Looking around, he saw a shotgun lying around. While picking up someone else's kit would likely leave him with some less familiar equipment, it was this or inevitably die. He picked up the other person's kit, which gave him a Model 10 shotgun with a medium supply of ammunition for it. Blaze grunted. It would have to do. besides, there were other dead players to pick guns off of.

Another three Italians came through the door. Blaze shot one of them and wounded the other so that someone else picked them off, but the third killed another defender before tossing an incendiary grenade at Blaze. the grenade was right on target, and the flames enveloped him. He ran immediately out of his cover, throwing a grenade of his own. The enemy soldier went down, but Blaze was down to 20% of his health. Another Austrian soldier shot the third attacker dead, but there were more coming. The enemy could sense that the defense was weakening.

Another barrage of grenades came in, followed by five more trying to breach the doorway. Blaze shot two of them, but was finally killed by the third, who did not live long enough to enjoy his victory, as he himself was gunned down. Even on the death screen, though, Blaze knew it wasn't anywhere near enough. The Austrians had lost the bunker.

"We lost it, Princess, I'm sorry."

"It's alright. I know you did what you could. I suppose it was too much to hope for..."

"They're down to 75 lives," Leon commented. "I think we can halt them in the next sector."

"Perhaps, but then again, they might push us back to the fortress itself. I'd prefer to try to end this here, if at all possible."

"And the enemy want to push us into the second map," Leon countered. "They'll have a chance of winning there."

"So they will. If they get there. And we'll be doing out best to not let that happen."

"Uh oh, we've been pushed back again."

And so it was. The sector had been lost, and now the Austro-Hungarians were scrambling to retreat to the next one. In the process of the retreat, the tank Eddy was in was first disabled, then blown up. The rage of the Englishman led to each of them temporarily muting him.

Leon realized that the fun he'd had in the attack plane had been too good to last. He'd finally been shot down by an enemy pilot who was good at his job. He wasn't the best dogfighter himself; aside from picking away at the dirigible and blowing up bombers, he preferred to bomb enemy ground positions. That lead to a lot of points and kills, but less of a chance to defend himself while in the air.

"Drat," he muttered as the plane fell from the sky. "Oh well. Got some work done in that thing. More than I expected."

"You down?" Rainbow asked.

"I'm down," he confirmed. "Somebody got behind me and shot me all to pieces."

"Well, ya get used to it. On the other hoof, it gives Blaze a chance to get a plane."

Leon grunted. He wasn't too thrilled about being knocked out of the sky, but he selected the assault class he'd used previously and deployed to one of the new flags. He ran to one of the cannons sitting nearby. It was nothing compared to the fortress gun he'd been using earlier, but it could still hurt tanks and definitely kill any players unfortunate enough to be in the blast radius of its shell.

He loaded the gun and aimed at an incoming artillery truck that had gotten careless and was focusing on an anti-aircraft gun. The truck was badly armored to begin with; a few AT rockets could bring it down. The stationary artillery was even more powerful; the truck just exploded. It might have been damaged already, for all Leon knew, but it still brought exhilaration.

Unfortunately, the stationary gun was, well, stationary. It couldn't move, unless one counted turning the thing while aiming it as moving. An AT rocket streaked just over the gun as Leon reloaded, and a stream of machine gun bullets battered the bullet shield as he raised the barrel.

Despite the gunfire, Leon found another target; an A7V was chugging along, flames bursting from its side as the gunners inside used their flamethrowers. This second shot also hit, a solid strike that disabled the vehicle and destroyed one of the weapons that had been spewing fire at his side.

"Giving you covering fire, Leon," Rarity announced. "As much as I can, at any rate."

"As am I," Luna added. "Please note, though, they are coming in numbers- Hold on." After a moment of silence, in which Leon supposed she had shot an exposed Italian, Luna went on, "They're coming. A lot of them. Two snipers aren't going to be enough."

"We have the rest of the team," Blaze said.

"We do, but we don't have direct communications with them, so we can't coordinate as well as we ought to. Maybe it's for the best, at least for this game; thirty or so players shouting through their headsets is probably not the healthiest thing for our ears."

"We're on our own, then," Leon stated flatly.

"We all technically are," Luna replied. "This isn't real soldiering, any more than the rest of you are royalty outside of Crusader Kings II. Many people in this game, if not most, choose to go their own way, and simply fight as one amidst others who are also fighting their own battles. They might not be 'alone' alone, but they aren't squadmates or friends or comrades. We're just a group that decided to try fighting together instead of apart. If World Of Tanks didn't teach you that lesson, I'm not sure what will."

"Perhaps." Leon fired again; flames burst from seams in the metal as the travelling fortress exploded, earning Leon two kills. Most of the crew had managed to get out, but at least that tank wouldn't be bothering anyone anymore. He allowed himself a small smile.

A whistling from the air announced - too late - that a bomber had taken aim at his position. The corpse of Leon's avatar flew as the gun he had been manning blew up under the barrage of bombs.

"Aaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhh......"

"At least you knocked out a few of them and gave us time to fight," Luna said, trying to soothe his anger. "In the meantime, cheer up. There will be more vehicles and emplacements to use."

"Going in as an assault again. I'm going to try to hold that bunker at the top of the field."

"The one shaped like a weird T, the one with an opening toward the flag? You realize that the Italians can just run in from there and outflank the locked steel doors, right?"

"Yeah. Still, they have to worry about snipers if the try going at it entirely above ground, and my Automatico has its best chance in enclosed spaces like that."

"True. Still, it might be more prudent to choose another class and adapt to the battlefield."

"I could say that about you guys too. The other side has snipers as well, and some of them will be looking for enemy snipers."

"Rarity and I do try to keep that in mind," Luna said. "After that happened a few times in previous engagements, I've tried to learn."

"By the way, that's one counter sniper out for the count," Rarity mentioned. "More will be coming, though."

As Leon respawned, Rainbow's plane flew by overhead and shot down the bomber that had killed him the last time. "Yaaaaaaahooooooo!" the blue pegasus shouted. "That's another one down!"

"That's all well and good," Luna said, "but both of our flags are falling."

"Me and Leon will take care of it," Blazing Star said. "I'll go to that bunker with ya."

"It's too late; the captures are happening too fast."

"I started near the bridge; I hit that one by mistake when I was choosing where to respawn," Leon said, heading for that particular flag. "I'll see what I can do."

The answer quickly became obvious; not much. There were too many green-coated soldiers by the flag to have any real hope of gunning them all down.

Instead of trying that, Leon pulled the pin on an anti-tank grenade and threw it, along with an incendiary grenade a moment later, into the capture area. A few seconds later, two kills popped up on his screen, along with a third who burned to death because of the incendiary grenade. A ton of points due to damage alone came up as well.

Unfortunately, a couple of the Italian players weren't happy about that; they surged up toward his position. He was able to shoot one of them down, but the second shot him dead before Leon could finish him.

"Aw rats. Sorry, guys."

"At least you tried," Luna reassured him. "We will all fall back to the fortress and make our stand there. We've managed to whittle them down fairly well."

"Even if we beat them here, we'll probably get pushed out by the Zeppelin," Eddy worried.

"We'll... we'll deal with that when that comes. In the meantime, retreat."

"I'll try and make sure all the doors down below are shut," Leon said. "The attackers win on this map if they aren't defended well enough."

"They'll be able to blow them up with grenades and anti-tank rockets. Still, you're right; that area needs defending."

"But Prin- Luna, what good will we snipers be in that situation?" Rarity asked anxiously.

"You can still snipe the attackers that try to enter from above ground; there should be a ledge leading of, just behind the fortress where you can- Oh, I am dead," Luna noted in a normal voice. "I was ironically killed by an enemy sniper."

"It's what happens to snipers. You snipe people, you get sniped," Leon said. "It's one of the reasons I have trouble with being one; I try sniping people, and half the time an enemy sniper puts a bullet through my head, or through my rifle scope and then into my head."

Luna whinnied. "It's the life of a sniper. Or scout, as they are called in this game."

Leon respawned in the fortress. He quickly jumped down into the basement and made his way toward the side entrance - the double set of steel doors that would be off to the left if one were an Italian player heading toward the fortress. No one had come through yet, but he did have to shoot down one enemy soldier who go there as he was shutting the outer door.

"If anyone has mines and wants to contribute, the door's locked now."

"I'm coming," Luna said. "I have incendiary mines. I'm honestly not sure just how good they will be, though, given that the other side usually just blows up these doors, and the mines blow up with them."

"Well, they are basically artillery shells that have been re-purposed. We'll need them-" Leon took a moment to stick his gun through the narrow window and shot down an enemy soldier. "-somewhere, and behind a door is about as good a place as any. Better than just leaving them out in the open."

"You won't get any argument from me there. And I suppose there has to be a counter to everything, otherwise everyone would do this all the time."

Leon continued to maintain his position; some of the enemies began throwing gas grenades, which wasn't the worst idea in the world as it forced him to don a gas mask, but some just threw incendiaries, which did not do enough damage to blow open the door.

"Just a couple guys left, we got this," Eddy said.

"Oh. I suppose my explosive knowledge won't be required then," Luna stated.

"Yeah, they haven't even breached the first-"

The door suddenly burst its hinges explosively, slamming into and killing Leon just as the round ended.

"-door," he finished, a few seconds late.

"What happened?" Eddy asked.

"Someone must have thrown a bunch of dynamite and set it off, because the door just blew open and killed me," Leon replied. "I don't know what else could have happened."

Rainbow laughed. The others either followed suit, Leon among them.

"Well, we won another round," Luna noted.

"We lost a lot of ground though," Rainbow observed. "We'll just have to give it our all."

"I think we might be able to hold this," Blazing Star commented.

"3, 2, 1..." Ed counted down.

"The enemy is being reinforced with an airship."

Equestria at War, Game 1 (part 1)

"...annnnnnnnnd we're back," Luna announced to the stream.

"Let's hope we don't crash, like the Battlefield 1 server last week," Leon grumbled.

"I doubt that will happen," Luna replied. "As for our audience, welcome to our playthrough of the Equestria at War mod for Hearts of Iron 4. Our - my - friend Leon will be playing as New Mareland. Edward shall be playing as the Kingdom of Wittenland. I shall be playing Equestria, and our niece Cadence shall be playing as the Crystal Empire, with her husband Shining Armor playing as Aquileia."

"Hi!" Cadence's voice rang out. "Glad to be here!"

"In addition, our friend Meta will be playing as the Changeling Lands."

"Greetings," the changeling said.

"What about the historical focus?" Leon asked.

"It's being turned off," Luna said. "The game gets too predictable otherwise."

"I hope New Mareland doesn't get stuck in infinite civil wars this time," Leon said. "I had that happen once when I was playing Greneclyf."

"I don't think it will, if you're the one playing it. Are we ready?"

"Yep."

"Yes!"

"Definitely!" Shining said.

"Edward?" Luna asked after a few seconds of silence.

"Huh? Oh, sorry. Just checking something. What's going on?"

"We're ready to start. Are you?"

"Oh, yeah. Er... let's go!"

The game began. Leon skipped past the history of new Mareland (not without regret) and began to organize what he had for an army.

"Are you going to declare independence, Leon?" Luna asked, with the game still on pause.

"I want to, but I know that Wingbardy will be able to do whatever they want to me if I do, plus I don't know how to stay in the United Ponies faction. I wish this mod would let you join alliances outside events."

"That would probably make things a bit too easy. But since this is a non-historical playthrough - not that this map has much resemblance to the real Equestria - maybe you can get away with it. Although I am a bit displeased - purely in-game, of course - to know that you desire independence."

"We're on an entirely different continent; why would we want to continue to be ruled by a distant autocracy?"

"Hey! We're not absolute autocrats; the law is above even a ruling alicorn."

"I'm remaining a vassal," Cadence said, "so long as my aunt promises not to annex me."

"I make this promise, and willingly so."

"Great!"

"Come now, honey," Shining's voice came out, "you know we ought to be able to stand up for ourselves."

"...Annnnnnd what if I decide I should stand up to you first?"

"..."

"Eddy, you ready?" Leon asked.

"Yeah. Get the lovebirds to agree on something and I'm ready."

"Hey!" came the dual voices of Shining and Cadence.

"Right; setting it to speed four, unless someone or somepony says to stop."

Leon immediately choose Patriation as a national focus, which would lead to independence. He wasn't too keen on leaving the alliance, but he didn't want an overlord telling him what to do. He had his divisions defend the border regions and set about building some civilian factories.

"So, any plans, Meta?" Luna asked.

"If you're looking for a promise from me not to invade you, the answer is no," the changeling answered. "I'll choose Mother Chrysalis or Thorax as I see fit."

"That in itself is telling."

"Try and stop me."

"Come on! There's no reason for us to have to fight! Maybe we could be allies?"

"Thanks Princess Cadence, but no. We do things our own way up here."

"Drat."

"I just hope I'm the one who wins the race to turn this Coalition into a country," Eddy said anxiously. "I know these other idiots are going to try."

"Be faster than them," Leon replied. "In my experience, they usually do something like one or two normal focuses, then one unification focus."

"Ah, alright. What are you going to do?"

"Wait for someone to declare war, beat them back, then eat their territory."

"Ah, the good old suckering in."

"Yeah. Mainly looking at Wingbardy."

"Oh, dear," Luna said, sounding faux-disappointed. "Meta, you've stomped on Thorax."

"Yes. And...?"

"So we're going to be fighting each other. I see."

"I'm not required to treat well - in a video game - a changeling that I and most of my people consider nearly a traitor."

"If it wasn't for him, we probably wouldn't have bothered with diplomacy with your hive at all," Shining cut in.

"Besides, why are you immediately worried? I'll be killing Olenia first. Not that you'll get the focus fast enough to ally with them."

"Grrr," Luna said, again in faux anger. "I suppose we'll be getting ready for your actual invasion of us then."

"Wait, Shining, why are you going the revolutionary route?" Leon asked. "You're a monarch yourself."

"Yeah, but I don't really like this king all that much, given the alternative. Like Luna said, we should be under the law, not dictating it."

"You're aware that the king gets his head chopped off and a war with all those baronies breaks out, right?"

"Yep. Don't worry; I've played this before. Good for gaining a strategic mindset in case of a real war. Although I agree that it's not entirely realistic."

"Okay, fine."

"By the way, who's winning the election?" the stallion asked.

"Oh, my elections? After independence? Kingfisher or Glad Mane."

"Really? I thought..."

"I don't want an aristocratic... um... guy... in... charge," Leon said, not sure how to say what he wanted politely.

"Aristocratic pain in the backside?" Eddy asked.

"Basically."

"Not all of the Canterlot nobility are snobs," Luna remarked, though continuing reluctantly, "Though, tragically I admit, a recent Gallop Poll has shown that about 54% of them more or less are."

"So my point stands. No aristocrats in charge."

"That hurts, Leon."

"Well, I mean-"

"Learn to take a joke, Leon," Luna replied, chuckling. "I get it. My sister and I hate that snobbery too. But we can't force them to give up their views via force; harmony can only be realized by a willing heart."

"Said while playing a game where you can literally raid and ban all other parties until only yours is left."

"I mean in real life, you vulgar peasant," Luna answered, laughing even harder.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND that's why we're leaving," Leon said as the focus for Independence passed. "Bye."

"Bah."

"Thanks for making it marginally easier to beat Equestria if I do end up at war with them," Meta said, cheekiness in her voice.

"I can still send volunteers."

"With Wingbardy to deal with, you'll have your hands full, so I doubt it."

"Yeah, um... What the?"

"Oh?"

"Wingbardy ditched Beakolini," Eddy announced, in response to the pop-up they'd all gotten. "They're communist now."

"Okay, that's probably better for me..."

"Not if they choose to break you, mate, they have a focus for that."

"Whatever. Communists, Fascists, I can deal with them either way. Maybe."

"Such confidence."

"Shouldn't you be trying to unite your federation?"

"Doing it, mate. Oh, revolution in Aquileia."

"Finally, got rid of that stupid king," Shining said. "And here come all the puppets."

"Kill Pridea first," Leon suggested.

"Yeah, I'm on it."

"Oh, good, the thestral issue," Luna said. "Um, which one...?"

"The one where you and Celestia work together. It costs a ton of political power, but it leads to thestrals having equality," Leon answered.

"Ah, thank you."

"So no civil war this time around?" Meta said, sounding faintly disappointed.

"No," Luna said. "I detest my former alter-ego, and I'm not giving you a chance to strike while Equestria is divided."

"I... see."

"I'll wager that you do indeed."

Immediately afterwards, Meta invaded Olenia.

"Ugh."

"Oh come on! It's not like they're useful to you. I'll have them as happy members of Mother's empire quite quickly.

"I'm issuing a diplomatic insult," Eddy said.

"Oh no, angry notes! And, why should I care again?"

"Because if you invade Equestria, you're going to get smashed," Luna warned.

"But Leon left your coalition, so..."

"Yes, he and about eight divisions," Luna replied. "I have far more factories, divisions, and ponypower than you or Leon, even combined. I am confident I can handle you... without having to become Daybreaker."

"Huh? Oh!" Shining said, surprised. "That Highhill guy just took over Nova Griffonia."

"Welp, there goes democracy in the old world," Leon said.

"As if a bumbling bureaucracy would manage to be an effective government," Luna replied.

"We're better off without it," Meta added. "No one cares about some stupid weak democracy. or a republic, for that matter."

"I care about the latter; it's why New Mareland is leaving Equestria."

"I hope we don't have to restart due to your secession; you'll be weak on your own."

"I don't care. It'll be our future, not that of a puppet master."

"Assuming Wingbardy doesn't kill you."

"I'll find some way to stop them, I think by joining the Republican Pact or Entente."

"Sure. Tell us if you live through it."

"I will, I will." Provided the AI cooperates...

"Uh-oh," Cadence said.

"What?" Luna asked.

"King Sombra. There's a pop-up, what-do-I-do, what-do-I-do?

"Say no to going to the meeting," Luna replied.

"Okay."

"Finally, down go the dukes," Shining said. "I thought I might not make it there for a sec."

"Are you going to kill the king?" Leon asked.

"I don't really have a choice, do I?"

"Woah, full-blown revolutionary here."

"I just want to tell the stream that I am not anti-monarchy in real life," Shining insisted. "This is in a video game only, it does not reflect my actual views. And that king was a real tyrant."

"Please accept me into your factions when you get there."

"I will if the focus is there, man."

"Bye Olenia," Eddy said as the pop-up showed up.

"Yep, they're now contented Changeling subjects," Meta said cheerfully. "Of course, they have to pay a love tax."

"Don't even think of coming after me," Luna warned again. "I have plenty of divisions and a large fleet and air force."

"The Changeling Lands are a sovereign power, don't tell me what to do!"

"I can warn you, and I have."

"Uh, uh, uh," Eddy said nervously.

"What's going on?"

"White Star was just challenged to a magic duel by this fascist leader."

"Choose the conservative magic options," Luna said. "You'll beat her easily so long as you don't use up a lot of magic."

"So it's a race to see who runs out of magic last?"

"Yes."

"Okay, I think I've got this."

"Let us know if you win," Leon said.

"Um, um, um.... YES! SHE'S DOWN! I WON!"

"RIP headphone users," Shining deadpanned.

"Sorry, sorry. But the fascist leader is dead, so now what?"

"You'll get challenged later by the stallion noble behind it," Luna answered. "Be ready for that, though I think it'll go easier."

"Right. Bye nobles, I'm going to strip you of everything."

"...and that's why you were challenged in the first place."

"Hey, why is Stalliongrad invading the griffons?" Cadence asked.

"Oh, that's bad," Luna said, sounding disappointed. "They'll end up puppeting them, and, well..."

"Great," Meta jumped in, "so, theoretically, if I invaded you right now-"

"Do not do that. Do your units not have reconnaissance?"

"Oh, I see that giant army on my border. Question is, if Stalliongrad invades you while I'm fighting you, how many of them are you going to have to siphon off?"

"I think I can manage well enough."

"Onhooves divisions won't be cutting it against my tanks."

"We'll see about that."

"Huh, the Griffonian Empire just went to war with this pact of three of it's southern neighbors," Shining noted.

"What the... the penguins just joined in the attack on Nova Griffonia!" Cadence exclaimed.

"Oh, well, maybe they'll seize enough territory to weaken them before they become a Stalliongrad puppet," Luna said hopefully. "Leon, are you ever going to have that election, or is Jet Set going to remain your ruler? I thought you were going to elect somepony else."

"I will! I just want to make sure my army and industry are up to the task, that's all."

"Sounds like you haven't made your choice," Meta said.

"So what? I'll get to it... eventually."

"Better sooner than later," Luna said. "You get better bonuses once you select someone."

"Fine, fine. Both of these guys are hardly the ones I want, but it's down to Kingfisher or Gladmane at this point. I don't know who to pick."

"A financial genius and manipulator, or a popular racist," Luna said. "Neither seem very good. If you want to ally with Shining, I think you'll have to stick with Jet Set, if you haven't bypassed him already."

"Ugh, fine. But I'll personally smack down any aristocratic nonsense."

"At least it's not MARESOC," Luna said. "Ugghghhgh, I get the shivers just thinking about a 1984 pony faction."

"I hate that book; the bad guys win."

"Me too, though I understand the message against authoritarianism and propaganda."

"Speaking of authoritarianism, keep an eye on your perforated neighbor."

"Hey!"

"Calm down, Meta," Luna replied. "We're all friends here."

"Hmph."

Leon finally selected Jet Set as the winner of the election. "Fine, pretty boy stays."

"You know you can role play him to not be a jerk, right?" Shining asked.

"I guess. Hey Cadence, are you remaining a puppet?"

"I'm not a puppet!" the pink alicorn said loudly. "And yes, unlike you, I'm going to remain a vassal to Equestria. We're at least grateful for the help they've provided us."

"Choosing a foreign master over freedom, huh?"

Instead of getting faux-angry, as Leon had expected, Cadence just laughed. "Hardly foreign. The Crystal Ponies have many of the same traditions and a similar culture as Equestria. Some of it is different, yes, but not to the point where they want independence at the moment in real life."

"I wonder..."

"Oh, push off, Leo. I'm Equestrian myself, and anyway, I know that independence would be dangerous, given the two warmongers to either side."

"So a foreign dynasty upon a native throne?"

Cadence chuckled again. "My subjects don't complain about it, so I don't think it matters. At least I've rationally made a decision, unlike you, jumping off a cliff with no plan and making it up as you go along."

"Hey! I didn't see Equestria help us in the Cockatrice War!"

"Ah, the Emu War reference," Luna said, laughing a little. "Although I must admit that cockatrices would be a much tougher enemy than flightless birds. There actually is a real life conservation project in Equestria regarding the Everfree Forest; after Twilight was turned to stone for a mercifully short time, my sister ordered that teams hunt down the beasts and capture them."

"How? Use a mirror to turn their powers against themselves?"

"We've tried that; the mirror turned to stone instead. No, we use teams of unicorns utilizing a spell that delays the stoning process, during which the cockatrice is knocked out and put in a metal box - with holes in it - and bring it to a facility that mimics its native environment."

"Too dangerous for the wild?"

"Indeed. Or at least in those areas of the Everfree that are near settlements."

"Wow, these smaller states really melt to Aquileia," Shining noted.

"Don't expect the Empire or Republic to be that easy," Luna warned. "They'll be much harder."

"I know. I just love winning so fast."

"Enjoy it while it lasts."

"Ugh, stupid River Republic," Eddy muttered.

"Are they outpacing you?" Leon asked.

"Not really, but doing all these stupid focuses on building the River Nation or whatever is costing me time for better stuff."

"You want to eat the Barron Magocracy, right?"

"Yeah. But you can hardly expand as Harmony, except as a Griffon republic."

"Because Harmony means making war on others to force them to become part of your emp-" Luna began, then paused. "Meta, you'd better halt that focus."

"What focus?"

"You know what focus; Plan Alicorn Sunset."

"Oh, that one. Sorry, but it's been five days and undoing that would waste time."

"No, it wouldn't; it you have ten days to change it initially, and so you still have five... four days now. I will destroy you if you invade me."

"What invasion?"

"...Prepare to be destroyed."

"...Bring it, moon granny."

"Oh boy, you're starting the Great War already?" Shining asked.

"Only if Luna resists."

"I will. And I've warned you."

"Well, that's happening," Eddy noted.

"Yeah, should be interesting," Leon said. "Second Changeling War initiated."

"Huh? Leon, what's this?" Shining asked.

"My alliance focus with you."

"Oh, okay. I accept."

"Bam! In the Entente. Eat it, Wingbardy!"

"Glad you're happy," Luna said. "Though being allied with me would have been just as effective."

"You say because you're losing," Meta twitted.

"Ha, hardly. I expected to lose some ground momentarily. How exactly are those submarines of yours faring against my destroyers and anti-submarine aircraft?"

"That's irrelevant."

"We shall see."

"Man, this national deputation or whatever sucks," Shining said. "I have to spend political power just so I don't lose deputies, and I can't finish focuses unless I have the support of enough of them. Plus, decisions to make my country better mean I have to spend more political power. How they expect you to have enough for continuing your main focus and for building your country..."

"Yeah, you have to use a lot of political power now," Leon noted. "It takes a little while, but it is worth it. They're trying to mirror how politics would actually work in Aquileia under a successful revolution."

"Well, it's painful."

"Would you rather have brought in the Reign of Terror instead?"

"No." Shining sighed. "I do wish this was a bit less tedious."

"Me too."

"Oh," Luna said with some mild surprise. "The penguins have invaded Nova Griffonia. Wonder how that will turn out."

"Let me be the first to say that the penguins in this game are clowns," Eddy said.

"Perhaps, though they do influence world events. No, Meta, that naval invasion isn't going to work."

"Blast it."

"Huh, Tarrin just declared independence," Shining said. "What do you think, Leon? Do I support them?"

"Yes, because you can later annex them peacefully."

"That's only if they remain harmonic, right?"

"I... don't know. You have the option, and I think you can invade them anyway if they say no."

"Alright."

"Oh dear, a paradrop," Luna remarked. "I suppose my air force was a little weak over that area. But it changes little, Meta. I'll crush it quickly."

"With what? Take units off the front line, and I advance. Dump a bunch of rookies in off the deployment line, and my paratroopers will smash them."

"I don't need to do either. Cadence, could you please send some of your excess units to clean up that spot?"

"No problem, auntie."

"Ugh," the changeling groaned. "Whatever, this is nothing but a temporary setback. My troops will do what they will while they can. Enjoy your troops loosing ammunition."

"I built a redundant rail network just in case something like this happened. Did you really think I didn't try to foresee any strategy or tactic you might try?"

"Oh really? Foresee this."

"Ah, you figured out my encryption. Of course. Regardless, I still have the advantage on the front line." There was a pause. "Sorry, friends; it is time to raise the moon and perform Night Court."

"Aw nuts," Eddy said unhappily.

"Don't worry, we'll meet again soon. To all our viewers, thank you so much for watching, and have a great night. Au revoir."

Author's Note

Sorry for not updating this in forever. Felt the BF1 chapter was going nowhere, which is why I ended it this way. I apologize to anyone who liked that thread.

Minecraft admin, Game 3; advertising

"Nice to finally have a server of our own," Leon remarked as he continued building a castle made of obsidian.

"It's not quite finished yet, but yes, it is," Luna replied happily.

"At least the people who play on this server seem happy," Ed mentioned.

"Indeed. While the castle is far from complete, there are plenty of people, and despite a few incidents of X-ray, so far things have been decent." Luna hummed for a moment. "What do you think we should rename our server once we're done? 'Lunaville' seems rather..."

"Not epic?"

"Not how I'd put it, but yes. A bit too boring for my tastes, and no doubt yours' as well."

"How many players do we have?" Eddy asked. "I've been too busy."

Leon checked. "Uh... seventy, seventy-five, ish? About that."

"On right now, or...?"

"On now."

"Remind me again, why did we put the server up before the castle was complete?"

"Because," Luna said, "we had the town, i.e. the spawn, set up and this is a survival PVP server; the players thus already have what they need, we're just adding something extra."

"For what? Night Court sessions?"

"Please be respectful. It is my server and of course it will have some night-flavored events."

"'Night flavored,'" Leon repeated. "What's that taste like?"

"Ha ha."

Adaccount1 has joined the server!

"Huh, odd name for a Minecraft player," Luna remarked. In chat she said, "Greetings, new subject! What is thy pleasure?"

Leon teleported to the new player, who was literally just a Steve skin.

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

PrincessLuna; Um, hello?"

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Leonhart1863; stop spamming chat

PrincessLuna; Please stop. Thou hast been warned.

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Fluttershee815; please stop

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

EdEddnEddy1997; shut up or get banned

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Rainb0w D4sh; shut up or I'll come over and give you a sword to the face!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1 was kicked by PrincessLuna; Spamming chat and advertising; read the rules upon rejoining.

"Ugh, that was annoying," Ed said. "What an idiot."

"Let's not be too harsh," Luna scolded lightly. "He might have learned his lesson.

Adaccount1 has joined the server!

"He's back already?"

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount1 was muted by PrincessLuna; Advertising and spamming

"Apparently he didn't learn his lesson," Leon said, disappointed.

"He's still saying it in a PM to me now," Luna said. "Okay, fully muting him."

Adaccount1 has left the server!

"Well, that didn't last too long."

"Did you ban him?"

"Of course not! The chat would have said that I did, and would have given the reason."

Adaccount2 has joined the server!

"He's back!" Leon said loudly.

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Appletnt; knock that off an just play, would ya?

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount2 was banned by PrincessLuna; Spamming chat and advertising are against our rules.

"Ugh, I hate having to do that," Luna said, sighing.

Adaccount3 has joined the server!

"Oh no..."

Adaccount3; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount3; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount3; Come join Skyworld! Free ranks to anyone who joins within ten minutes!

Adaccount3 was ipbanned by PrincessLuna; Spamming and advertising.

"Blast it," Luna said quietly. "I wish I hadn't had to do that; it was clearly one person on multiple accounts.

"Yeah, we figured."

Rainb0w D4sh; what's up Princess?"

PrincessLuna; Just someone trying to advertise their server. We wonder why.

Appletnt; I hate advertising in general; why waste your time doing it on Minecraft of all places?

Rarity980; I agree, darlings, utterly foolish. Tell your friends in person or through PMs about your server, don't go and try to actively take players away from that of somepony else.

"I guess our friends agree with us," Eddy said.

"I suppose they've started their own server, and want people to join," Luna said. "Advertising like that, however? No."

Houseman has joined the server!

Houseman328; Why have you ipbanned my admin from your server!?!

"Oh dear," Luna said aloud.

"Want me to put him in lava?" Eddy asked... practically begged, really.

"No. Let me handle this."

PrincessLuna; Adaccounts 1, 2, and 3 I presume?

Houseman 328; Ya. He was telling people about our server and you banned him!

PrincessLuna; Read rule 8. It specifically says that advertising other servers is not allowed. Also read rule 3, which forbids spamming chat.

Houseman328; I don't care about your rules, I need people and staff for my server!

Houseman328 was kicked by PrincessLuna; Read the rules and follow them, or leave.

Houseman328 has joined the server!

Houseman328; WHY DI DYOU KICK ME?

PrincessLuna; I gave the reason when I kicked you. Read our rules and follow them, or leave.

Houseman328; I need people for my server! This is the easiest way!

PrincessLuna; And how would McDonalds reply if you went over there and called for everyone to follow you to Burger King or Wendy's? They'd kick you out. Make blogs online, talk to friends in PMs or in real life; don't go spamming chat with your server with possibly fake claims of free ranks.

Houseman328; I will report this abuse to Mojang or whoever is in charge; your server will be taken down for violating freedom of speech and banning people for no reason!

PrincessLuna; Freedom of Speech does not apply for private entities or player-made servers on internet games. We can make whatever non-abusive rules we please. Your admin was not abused, he was warned and, when he insisted on rudely ignoring us and spamming your server in chat, he was banned. I also doubt that Mojang or MCBans will be upset with us, given we have the logs of this entire encounter.

EdEddnEddy1993 set Houseman328's name to DumbServerOwner14!

"Edward! Undo that at once!" Luna demanded.

"Fine," Eddy said in a reluctant tone.

EdEddnEddy1997 removed Houseman328's nickname.

Houseman328; I will bring more admins here to advertise; unban my admin on all his accounts RIGHT NOW, and let my admins advertise, or I will take this server down!

Houseman328 was banned by PrincessLuna; Threats. We will not unban your admin or allow any of your admins to advertise. You can appeal your ban on our website.

"Let's hope that's the last of it," Luna said, sighing again.

Houseman329 has joined the server!

Houseman329; UNBAN US OR BE SUED!

Houseman329; UNBAN US OR BE SUED!

Houseman329; UNBAN US OR BE SUED!

Houseman329; UNBAN US OR BE SUED!

Houseman329 was ipbanned by PrincessLuna; Spamming.

"I hope he doesn't go and send a million accounts to our server to spam in chat," Leon said.

"If he does, we'll ipban him and all his 'friends,'" Luna replied. "Let them make of that what they will."

"What if they actually do sue us?" Ed asked.

"Then I'll counter-sue... or more likely, just let their complaint die; when a judge sees it, I have my doubts it will even be entertained, much less served."

"Back to it, then," Eddy said.

"Indeed, there's much work still to do. And we still need a better name."

"Nightville, maybe?"

"A bit dull, what else do you have?"

Author's Note

*Note; I do not know if Skyworld is a legitimate Minecraft Server; I just made up the name for the sake of this chapter.

Chapter inspired by this video;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cODjs2aBRwk

One caveat I have to give this; I am against advertising that is obnoxious and offensive, as in this chapter, not necessarily against all advertisement (~~even though sometimes I wish I could delete YouTube ads from the entire internet, those things give me the rage~~). Furthermore, this chapter is purely about this kind of advertisement within Minecraft; it is not about religious preaching.

World of Tanks, game 1; Loltractor meets angry teammate

Leon yawned. It had been a hard day at school, with tests in history and math (ugh, that evil math!). Now he was at home, and ready to relax.

He walked into his room and turned on his computer. Now, the fun begins, he thought. Leon had agreed to play World of Tanks that day after school, and one of his friends on the game was already waiting for him. He picked up his head set, plugged it in, and turned it on.

"Oy, mate, I've been waitin' for fifteen minutes for you, where have you been?" a British-accented voice said into Leon's ears.

"Sorry," Leon replied. "I just got off the bus. We ran into traffic."

"Alright, I suppose that happens on either side of the pond eh?"

"Yeah, Eddy, it does. Now, where is..."

Another voice came in, a feminine one; "Sorry I'm late gentlemen, the court ran long today, and I had a lot of royal work to do."

Princess Luna. Leon whistled. It had been six months ago that a magical portal had opened in the Midwestern United States. and guess who had come through it? Princesses Celestia and Luna, along with the six Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. As it turned out, the MLP;FIM universe was real; and the ponies in that world had wanted to come meet ours. The two universes had managed to get along peacefully so far. The ponies provided magic to help humans in many ways; in return, humans provided advanced technologies.

One of the inventions the two species had come up with as an interuniversal internet.

Of course, there were some rules that came with this; the Princesses had agreed to allow the usage of the IUN (Inter-Universal-Network) provided that most things obscene were toned down heavily. The governments of Earth had largely agreed (with the notable, or perhaps not so notable, exceptions of North Korea and Iran, whom the Equestrians had been taken aback by).

In any event, Princess Luna had become fascinated with gaming and the internet. Leon had found her one day in World of Tanks by accident; of course he hadn't known it was really her; so many people used the name "Luna", most of them obviously bronies. It was only after the battle that Leon, who had been utterly defeated, found out just who he had played against. Oddly enough, they had become firm online friends ever since.

Eddy came from Britain; he too had been a fan of the show, and had been estatic to meet Princess Luna, although that had only been after Leon and Luna teamed up to kill his KV-1 with lower tier tanks; He hadn't liked that (Leon found he could still get himself to chuckle when he remembered Eddy's furious chat bombardment), but his anger had evaporated when he found that he had had the honor of losing to a pony, and a Princess come to that.

"Thats ok", Leon replied. "Let just platoon up and see how many noobs we nail today, shall we?"

"Agreed."

"Agreed."

All three players formed into a platoon, led by Eddy, who had decided to use a VK3601H for this battle; Leon was using a Panzer IV (One of the best tanks in the game in Leon's opinion), while Luna, newer to the game, was using the mutilated tank destroyer called the M3 Lee; it was necessary to get the M4 Sherman unfortunately.

"Alright, I'm hitting the start button guys."

"Good."

"Let us begin!"

However, seconds later...

"Oh for fuck's sake, some idiot platooned with a stinking Loltractor!" Eddy shouted over the headset.

Leon jumped, then looked at the screen; indeed, another VK3601H on their team had platooned with a Leichtractor, more commonly known as a Loltractor or Loltraktor. The issue at hand was that the tanks in the game were arrainged by tier; tier 1 was the lowest, with tanks that could quite accurately be described as tin cans, to say the least, while tier 10 had the real, heavy monsters than could crush most enemy opposition.

The Loltractor was a tier 1 tank; almost useless against the tier 4s, 5s, and 6s that they were up against. the only way to bring one against higher tier tanks was to have one platoon with you, or for you to platoon with a higher tier player, depending on whether you were the higher player or the tier 1. People did this kind of thing with other tier 1 tanks, most notably the t1 Cunningham and the MS-1, but the Loltractor was the classic of the bunch.

"Please, Edward, do not shout or swear over the headset," came Luna's upset voice.

"*sigh* sorry, Luna. It's just... I don't even..."

"I know."

Finally the game loaded and the players could see their tanks. Already some of their teammates were making comments about the "moron platoon", as Leon usually called them. Some were berating the two players for bringing a useless tank onto their team, while others made fun of the situation, using the chat to say things like 'FEAR OUR MIGHTY LOLTRAKTOR!" and other stupid statements like that. One opposing player typed "Oh no were screwed!"

If only I could teamkill both these idiots to teach them a lesson. Leon tried not to teamkill, at least in World of Tanks; for one thing, in an FPS like Halo, you could be teamkilled and respawn seconds later. World of tanks had yet to install a respawn system; once you died, you were dead until the battle ended. For another, you could be punished by the auto tk system for doing it; after two teamkills, a player's icon would turn blue, and anyone on either team could kill them without penalty; however, teamkilling a teamkiller before they turned blue would lead to the vigilante player being punished.

In any event, the timer went down, second by second, as Malinovka (known to many as "Campinovka" due to the WWI fortifications and the amount of defense/camping both sides generally went with) came into focus. Leon, an impatient Mainer, felt like it was almost an eternity before the game started.

At last, the timer counted down completely and said "GO!"

Leon darted forward, hoping to find a good spot to snipe from; he had read in a magazine somewhere that it was good for that, and He had managed to take out some KV-1s with it, mostly from the side.

Suddenly a gun roared, and there was the sound of a tank exploding. Leon looked around and saw that a BDR G1B had blasted the Leichtractor into scrap metal, and it wasn't even ten seconds into the game.

The Leichtractor player typed "WTF!?"

The BDR replied "Don't bring useless tanks idiot."

While this was going on, the VK the L-tractor had platooned with swung his gun around and blasted the BDR, which turned and tried to fight back, but ultimately died.

BDR; "What the f*** you damn trolls Ima report you f***wads for unfair play."

VK; "Wasn't trollin dude, was bringing my kid brother to play the game." After a pause, the VK went on, "And that's fine, I'll report you for teamkilling."

Other players joined in, while another enemy player said, over the "All chat," "Wow nice shooting :P"

Leon facepalmed. "Come on guys, let just get to playing."

Eddy was laughing. "He deserved it, I was going to kill him myself, but the French bloke killed him before I was ready."

Leon tried to ignore this; he found the situation funny as well, and if he dwelled on it, he wouldn't be able to play effectively. "Come on," he said, "Two players down is bad enough. We don't need any further distractions."

Luna said nothing in response to all this, though Leon would have bet she had been inches away from using the Royal Canterlot Voice; he did NOT need that blasting his ears.

Leon took up a position in facing the main field, waiting for someone to cross the field, hopefully a noob who didn't yet know how to play the map. However, the only vehicle he saw at first was a Pz 38 that dashed across the field; Leon and another player fired at it, but missed, allowing the enemy scout tank to escape into the marsh near the lake.

"I don't think anyone's defending the right," said Luna; Sure enough, the area to the right (they had started on the southern end of the map) had no one rally defending it.

"Ok, I'm coming." Eddy's tank raced just behind Leon's as he went to help Luna.

Leon was too busy to pay much attention to his platoon-mates after that; an enemy KV-1 was emerging from the left side of the field, possibly to try to flank their team.

Yeah, thats not going to happen. Leon pressed the shift button, zooming in on the enemy vehicle. He aimed for the tracks; a tank that couldn't move was a sitting duck. He fired. "Penetration!" shouted the in-game voice as the KV-1 stopped moving.

Yes! Leon pumped shot after shot into the enemy tank; though some of his rounds ricocheted, he did a substantial amount of damage, plus two of his teammates had joined in. Finally, the KV exploded after someone caused a fire that killed off the enemy.

Leon glanced at the scoreboard; aside from the two teamkills, their team had lost two other tanks and had killed three. as he watched, it went up to four enemy vehicles destroyed as Luna got in a good shot on the Pz 38 that Leon had missed earlier. three other enemy tanks were under fire in the middle of the field; apparently they had thought that they were going to get an easy win after two of their enemies had been destroyed before they had even fired a shot. Leon and the others were doing their best to prove them wrong.

One of the enemies in the field died as an artillery shot slammed into it. Leon didn't especially like artillery in the game, but bitching about it, both ingame and on the forums, had only gotten him negative responses, to say the very least. And he was grateful for the help here in any case.

Leon took aim at a B1 that had dared to cross open ground; the opposing vehicle was taken down to two-thirds of it's health in one shot as he fired. Another couple of shots and the B1 was almost dead... then another player finished it off.

D'oh! That was frustrating. He mumbled rude words under his breath as he spun his gun towards the last enemy on open ground, fired, and saw it explode.

Now the score was seven enemies destroyed to five; however, Eddy was taking damage from an opposing Sherman variant (That was what Leon called E8s and E2s).

"Hey guys, I'm taking heat over here, could someone..." Before he could finish, an enemy arty blew him to shreds. "Aw, dammit!"

Leon took a look at the battlefield; it looked like the other allies watching no-man's land could hold their own, so he drove his tank to the right. Luna was still trying to fire at an opposing VK3601H that was hunting for their team. He stopped and shot at it's tracks; he hit, and the VK stopped moving. However, it was turning it's turret in his direction.

Uh oh. He shot furiously at it, but did little damage. Fortunately, the VK's first shot missed, so he got in a few more shots before it did hit him. The Panzer IV lost almost half it's health from one hit. Leon kept shooting. Another shot broke his right track. In the meantime Luna kept shooting, but had little success, although she did manage to continually track the enemy.

He was hit again; he was now down to a few dozen hitpoints. The next shot would almost certainly kill him. As he stood there, waiting for his gunner to reload for one last hopeless shot, two artillery shots in close succession slammed into the VK, reducing it's health to 4%. He also thought it's gun had been knocked out, because although it continued to look at him, it didn't fire.

Leon and Luna fired almost simultaneously; the VK exploded, crediting the kill to Leon.

He let out a sigh of relief as Luna thanked him for the help. That was a bit too close. Looking at the scoreboard, he saw that only four enemies, two of them artilllery players, were still alive. None of the enemies had anything above tier five.

"You know, you could have come a bit sooner and I might still be, oh, I don't know, alive?" Eddy sounded a little ticked off.

"I thought it was arty that got you."

"Yeah, but that damn VK did most of the damage."

Whatever. You're dead. get over it. Leon didn't say it out loud, but Eddy tended to get very upset whenever he died in the game. That got annoying. Glancing at Luna's M3 Lee, he saw she was still at 75%, still good to go in other words. His own tank had 35 hitpoints left. Still good enough to get in a few licks of my own before going down.

Leon and Luna pushed forward, ignoring Eddy as he began rambling on how unfair his death had been and how his teammates should have helped him, although Leon briefly considered teasing him about it. Another B1 got in their way and died quickly; although it was a tier four tank, it's 47mm gun was rarely enough to do much damage to a Lee, let alone a Panzer IV. Leon was little worried when it hit him twice in close succession, but the rounds bounced off, and Luna got the killing shot on the B1. Looking at the minimap, he could see that his three other teammates were pressing ahead. Before he and Luna could reach the enmy base, the remaining enemies were killed. The victory tune began to play.

Leon found himself back in the garage, although still platooned with Eddy and Luna.

"Well that was fun." Eddy sounded like he had gotten over his death. "Up for another round?"

"Sure," Leon and Luna said at the same time.

Ok, here's the first chapter of this sucker, hope you like it. This story will have no definitive end, as I'll add more chapters as I find more themes and ideas for it.

Halo Wars, Game 1

Leon sat down in his easy chair in front of his Xbox 360, turned it and his T.V. on, and waited as the game system loaded.

In moments he heard a dinging sort of sound, along with a pop-up saying, "Nightstar211 would like you to join a party." He hit the X in the center of the controller and hit the affirmative option.

There was another dinging sound, and he was in the party. "Good evening, Leon," Luna said over the headset, "or should I call you Firestar?"

"Whatever is pleasing to you, Nightstar."

"I can't believe I'm named after a minor male character in an obscure series about cats!"

"It's not obscure," Leon said, chuckling, "they say 'Best seller' on the cover-"

"You fell for it again."

"Darn. Still, Nightstar isn't exactly a minor character if he's a leader of a Clan, considering the revolution he ends up leading in the first book and the battle he leads in Forest of Secrets."

"I still say it was ThunderClan's business who they chose to keep prisoner and who they didn't."

Ding! "Hey chaps."

"Hey Ed, what's new?"

"Is that some sort of crack?"

"Uh," Leon said cautiously, "Nooooo."

"Good. Then lets play the damn game."

Leon put the game Halo Wars in the game console and skipped to the start screen. After accepting a request to join a 3v3 game from Luna, he sat back in the chair, relaxing after the day he'd had, which had, which had involved a math test which he was sure he'd done pretty mediocre at.

The map Luna had chosen was Fort Deen, their favorite map to play on. Luna had chosen to play as the Prophet of Regret.

"Oh, nice choice, Luna; laze them all with the Death Star, that's original."

"Oh, shut up, Edward. I see you chose Forge again, with his terrible Grizzly canister and carpet bomb."

"Grizzlies are awesome. 'Nuff said. Leon went for Professor Anders again, discount on tech that doesn't matter once everything's been researched; at least I can save a hundred resources every time I have to build or rebuild a supply pad... oops, I mean a heavy supply pad..."

"Hey," Leon protested, "Anders can have a fully teched-up army of Scorpions or Warthogs out there twice as fast as anyone else. If you have the better units faster, then you don't need the economy in order to win; you just blow up the enemy's bases."

"Alright, alright," Luna said, "are you both ready to start?" The answers were both yes. They all hit the start button.

The game proceeded to a generic loading screen portraying a part of the map and it's description, as well as the teams that were matched against one another. On the other teams' gamertags were X_Silverfish_X, LOLMAN824, and AWESOMENESS101.

"That last is Rainbow Dash's own account," Luna mentioned. "Be careful, she's probably good."

The game began as Leon's base came into view. He quickly set up; Supply Pad, Reactor, Supply Pad, Supply Pad. In the meantime, with the spare money (yes, technically it was 'resources," but "money" was faster to say), he added a Warthog to the queue. It was good to have some of those for an early force, especially once he researched the gunner tech for them. He set the one he started out with to collect a pile of crates next to his base.

There wasn't much else to do, so he moved over to Luna's base. She had already queued up two Warehouses and a Temple, getting ready to throw her leader out into the world.

As if she knew he was watching her, she took that moment to say, "Don't kill any of the Rebel bases on our side of the map. I'll need those to get stars for the Prophet."

"Wasn't going to, but you might want to start out with the jerks covering the teleporter."

"I might, but bases are easier."

"Oy!" Eddy shouted. In order to get the others to pay attention, he pinged the area of the map he wanted them to look at. "RD's building an Air Pad, probably gonna go for early Hawks." Sure enough, having been scouted by Eddy's Warthog, the green UNSC base was now visible, and an air pad was currently being built on one of the pads.

"That could be problematic for the tank army I intend to build," Leon remarked.

"Me too. I was gonna build a million Grizzlies and swamp them."

"Well, we'll have build a few Wolverines then," Leon said; the UNSC's anti aircraft vehicle was a missile-spewing monster. When fully upgraded, it only took a few of them to menace even a full army of air units. They cost two population, while tanks cost three. The UNSC started with thirty population, which could be upgraded to forty. The Covenant started with forty and ended up with fifty. It was unwise to go full wolverines, but seeing as the Covenant's vehicles were terrible compared with their UNSC counterparts - especially the Scorpion, which made mincemeat out of the Wraith - they often tried to go with full Banshee armies. The only other tangible choices were combinations of Hunters, Jackals, and Vampires, which were the Covenant's own anti-air unit. These choices meant slower movement. Hunters cost 250 resources vs. the Banshee's 200, and the Banshees could move a heck of a lot faster. Luckily they were vulnerable to anti-air, but that didn't stop players from throwing them into combat, losing them, and instantly queuing up more where they had come from.

"Ah," Eddy went on, "Orange went straight for a Barracks, I can already see Marines."

"ODSTs then. This guy must like Russian Steamroller tactics."

"Yeah, bad idea." Eddy's Warthog kept driving on, until an enemy Arbiter went into rage mode and destroyed it. Eddy clucked. "Well, that was good while it lasted."

"Did you see anything of Red's?"

"Nope. He's got a couple bars on his rank, Captain, probably going to try building a Scarab."

"That's not good for us," Luna noted. "We aren't exactly equipped to destroy one."

"You mean none of us went Cutter, so we don't have a MAC cannon to immediately blast it to scrap metal," Leon quipped. "Rainbow's probably going to be the real pain, the other two seem like new guys."

"Says the guy with three Warthogs. You rushing, Leo?" Eddy asked.

"Not unless I can mess up Rainbow's base, and I'm not sure I can." Leon gave it some thought. Wrecking the air pad or blowing up a supply pad would force Rainbow to rebuild it, using credits desperately needed in the early game. "If I can get five Warthogs out quickly, I might go for it."

'By the way, what is our plan if this draws out?" Eddy said to both Leon and Luna.

"I say Super Turtle," Leon suggested.

"Pffft. You're only saying that because of all those online videos you watch."

"I'd suggest taking the war to them as soon as possible," Luna advised. "With somepony like Rainbow Dash on their side, the other team, new or not, will become a pain in our necks."

"Alright, but now that I've got all five Warthogs, I'm going in," Leon announced.

"You sure five 'Hogs are gonna do anything?" Eddy inquired.

"I'm going to add more in as the whole thing goes on. And I'm not going to just sit there as my 'Hogs get wrecked, My goal here is to wreck buildings and do damage, not take someone out of the game. You want to take people out at the start of the match, use a leader rush or a MAC rush."

"How many MAC rushes have you seen work?" Eddy asked as Leon moved his Warthogs to attack Rainbow's base in the center of the enemy position (it was on the concrete side, whereas their own team was on the grassy side).

"Not many," Leon admitted. To be sure, the MAC rush - everyone playing as Cutter, driving a Warthog up to an opponent's base and hitting it with a single MAC from each player, destroying it - was more for laughs than for serious play, in fact he'd never heard of anyone using it for real.

"Good luck, anyway."

Leon knew he couldn't rely on his teammates to help him with the rush; Luna had sent her Prophet to kill a rebel base and the units guarding it, while Eddy was too busy focusing on his economy to do much of anything.

His Warthogs crossed most of the map without facing anything more than a few pot shots from towers on rebel bases. unfortunately, LOLMAN824, who was the orange UNSC player, had a Marine on the ramp he drove up on, which probably tipped off everyone on the other team to the attack.

Regardless, Leon ordered his units to attack a Supply Pad Rainbow Dash had built on her base. Pieces of the building chipped off as five machine guns tore it up. Another Warthog came up and added it's own firepower to the mix. The Supply Pad blew up as it's health bar was depleted.

"Got a Supply pad, going for the Air Pad."

"Uh look out, mate, you got a bunch of Marines coming for you."

Sure enough, a group of eight or nine orange Marines were charging forward, obviously trying to wreck the attacking force.

"That's fine, they'll never catch up with me." When Leon ordered his Warthogs to go around to another part of the base, the Marines were left behind.

"Careful, you might get caught out from there."

"I know what I'm doing," Leon replied, shooting up Rainbow's Reactor a little as his Warthogs quickly darted out of the danger zone, which was the space between the base and a cliff, where many a tank or Scarab or what-have-you had indeed been trapped by hostile ground forces.

He started to giggle. "I can see Rainbow now, yelling at her teammates for not helping."

"Speakin' 'o which, you got an Arbiter coming to rage you," said Eddy.

"Uh oh, that could be a problem." Red's Arbiter was running up in Rage Mode, and began a series of jumping attacks on Leon's Warthogs. Luckily, he hadn't been upgraded much, so all he did was kill two Warthogs and damage another. The damage could be easily repaired. As his units began the rush, he'd upgraded his Reactor and build a Factory, allowing him to build tanks, so at least he would be able to repair the damage.

"Yes! Got my first star," Luna remarked excitedly.

"Good, can you clear out the teleporter?"

"I can, in fact I'm already on my way there."

"Ok, thanks." As this exchange ended, Leon's first tank rolled out of his base, and he ordered another base to be constructed on one of the base sites Luna had cleared out. So far, things were going alright.

The next few minutes were quiet. Luna kept blowing up Rebel bases and taking out scattered Rebel infantry with her Prophet, who got his second star very quickly after smashing the Rebels guarding the teleporter, who, since they had experience at the start of the game, were worth more to someone going for experience, especially on a Covenant leader.

Then Leon noticed a red icon on the minimap; on closer inspection, it was the symbol for the Arbiter, who was headed for Eddy's base.

"Hey, Ed, you have an Arbiter coming to your base."

"Aw, what's he gonna do?" Eddy asked contemptuously.

What the Arbiter was going to do was made clear; as he neared the base, Suicide Grunts began teleporting in en masse around him.

"Oh, bugger!" the British player shouted.

"I see it," Luna said quietly. "Coming."

Leon ordered his tanks to intercept the suicide army, then Cryo-bombed the enemy army, freezing much of it in place for a few seconds. He hadn't upgraded it, so it didn't last long, but at least the Arbiter and most of his grunt army had been stalled.

Seconds after the enemy had been frozen, Eddy dropped a Disruption bomb (commonly known as the "D-bomb" or "EMP bomb") on top of the Arbiter, preventing him from teleporting away or calling for more reinforcements. The best thing of all was that the Arbiter couldn't rage until either the bomb's effects wore out or he walked out of it's area of effect, so he was more or less helpless. Leon's tanks as well as a few of Eddy's tore at the enemy, while the Prophet, still grounded but upgraded to have a pair of sentinels guarding him, was slicing at the suicide units with the Cleansing Beam; within thirty seconds, half of the Suicide Grunts were dead, and the Arbiter was down to half-health.

At the same time, a few Grunts had managed to reach Eddy's base, and started to explode, destroying two Heavy Supply Pads and doing damage to the main structure. Luckily they didn't manage to do any more before the rest were wiped out completely; the Arbiter bugged out, walking to a point beyond the range of the d-bomb and warping away.

"Phew. Thanks, guys."

"Anytime." Leon built a Reactor on his second base; the canister shell was perhaps the best upgrade in the game, and he needed tech level 3 to get it. He also queued up a Barracks in order to train Spartans to put in his tanks.

"Uh oh," Luna spoke up, sounding a little worried. "Orange has sent in an entire army of Marines against my expansion base."

"Really? They aren't even ODSTs?"

"No, but there's a full army of them. And they'll have a MAC."

"Yeah, that's the big issue," Eddy remarked. "Better drop a d-bomb."

"I don't have one; only UNSC leaders, like yourselves, can use one."

"Leo, you get to do it this time; mine's still recharging."

"Fine." Leon centered his camera on the threatened base and d-bombed it; if Orange researched ODSTs in the middle of this fight, he didn't want him to start dropping them in. He also sent his army of tanks to intercept the enemy force.

The Marines began shooting at a Summit on the base; luckily, since the base had a Shield Generator on it, it was protected from damage... until three MAC slugs fell out of the sky on top of an area of the base unprotected by the d-bomb, killing the shield and doing some damage to the base. Almost as soon as that happened, the Marines mass-volleyed rockets into the central base structure; the health bar dropped to a point where it's color had turned red.

"Uh, help?" the Princess asked with a wavering voice

However, in doing using both unit and leader powers, Orange now had nothing to defend himself against the army of Scorpions that crashed into his flank, or from the Banshees that began plunking away at them with plasma fire. Eddy sent in a Carpet Bomb; the effect was devastating. Leon ordered his tanks to use canister shells. Marines dropped like flies before everything thrown at them.

A group of green Hornets flew in from the center of the map and started firing missiles at Leon's tanks. He wondered why they had been thrown in this late in the battle; if they had been committed at the start, the base might have collapsed. As it was, the Hornets began falling back as soon as the Marines had been finished off.

"Well, that went well," Eddy remarked.

"I agree, although my base took significant damage."

"Here, have a heal." Eddy used the healing power that was available to al UNSC commanders to heal the base. The health bar for the main structure slowly climbed back toward the right side of the bar.

"Thank you."

"I'm going to go wreck Orange's base." Leon announced. "He probably doesn't have much after we destroyed his army." As he said this, he sent his army toward one of the Orange player's expansion bases.

"Not sure that's a good idea, mate; Rainbow has Hornets, and she's probably researching Hawks as we speak."

"Well, if we knock out Orange, that's 30-40 population worth of units permanently out of the fight. If he's as stubborn as you would expect, he's just going to throw ODSTs into the field till he's wiped out."

"Please be careful," Luna advised.

"I will."

Leon's tanks crossed the field without incident. Just behind the shield wall, the enemy base was completely undefended. He ordered his tanks to destroy a barracks on one of the pads. It went down quickly, as did two other structures, a Supply Pad and a Field Armory. Then he gave the order for his tanks to canister the central building of the Fortress. The damage was extensive, to say the least.

He expected Green Hornets to show up at any time, but they were surprisingly late to the party. It wasn't until the Orange base was down to red health that Rainbow committed her aerial units into the battle.

Leon was ready. He dropped a Cryo bomb on top of the attacking units, destroying a few and freezing the rest. His two wolverines, though not upgraded, fired volleys of missiles into the stonewalled Hornets, while his tanks kept pounding the base.

Luna sent a few Vampires into the fight; the Covenant anti-air unit was itself a flying unit and vulnerable to anti-air. Red sent in his own army as well, a large group of his own Vampires. These started taking fire as the Orange base finally exploded and Leon's tanks were looking for more targets. The Red Arbiter made an appearance as well; a brief appearance, as it turned out, as he was d-bombed again by Eddy and Leon's tanks' canister shells obliterated him.

"Oh ho, yes!" Eddy cheered, even though his units hadn't done the actual killing.

By now though, the Hornets had done enough damage to Leon's army that he had to withdraw. His Wolverines had been overwhelmed by the sheer number of enemy air units, and he'd lost five of his tanks already.

"Pulling back," he announced.

"Okay, I'm sending the rest of my Banshees and Vampires to cover you," Luna answered. Purple Vampires did indeed cover Leon's retreat, and the Hornets withdrew before taking any excessive damage.

"Thanks."

"Anytime."

The game was quiet for the next little while. Eddy got a third base, as did Luna, and all three of them built up their economies and researched technologies.

"So Luna," Leon said after several minutes of silence, "what happened today in court?"

"On, nothing new," the Princess answered. "Blueblood wanted a massive allowance when he does nothing; that got shot down instantly. Some of the nobles came, saying we should lower taxes on them so, in their words, 'the more important ponies could get things done.' Needless to say, the answer to that was a big no as well. Some dignitaries from the Zebra Tribes came; it's always a pleasure to speak to them, they're surprisingly cultured for a people that live primarily in huts and tents. Ah yes, and I permanently banned a Griffon ambassador from Equestria."

"Why? What did he do?"

"Oh, nothing. If you count cheating honest merchants, and yes, those do exist, of their hard-earned money, causing an uproar from public drinking, and making lecherous faces at everypony, especially at my sister, as nothing."

"Wow." Leon scratched his head. "How can people be that stupid?"

"I know. Still, he won't be back, not unless both me and my sister die before he does, which is highly unlikely, considering the relative peace Equestria lives in. Anyway, after he was unceremoniously thrown out the front gate by my Guards, a group of farmers requested and received a permit to build an orange plantation in the southern regions of the country. After that, court was over, and I went to the spa for a hooficure."

"Your hooves wouldn't be able to feel the change, let alone any dirt or grit that got on them."

"Perhaps, but we like them to at least look good, which was the point, and I was able to relax for the first time today."

"Uh, glad you guys have had time for such a lovely little chat, but there's a massive army coming to destroy my base, if you hadn't noticed," Eddy cut in.

Leon took a quick look at the minimap and saw a myriad of green, red, and orange blips heading straight for the British player's base.

"Oops, sorry Ed," he apologized as he sent his tanks and Wolverines over to help.

This enemy army was much stronger for the fact that at last all three opposing players were cooperating. An entire army of ODSTs was coming in behind a full army of Suicide Grunts. Green Hawks flew in and out of view; clearly Rainbow was hoping to join the battle after her teammates had engaged.

Leon Cryo-bombed the Suicide Grunts; though he could have saved it for the Hawks, he knew the Grunts were more dangerous if they got to the base. Eddy agreed, for he used a Carpet bomb against them. It was fully upgraded, so the casualties came from both the Orange and Red armies.

"Do you want my help?" Luna asked them.

"No. In fact it might be more prudent if you attacked one of their bases," Leon replied, still waiting for his tanks to show up. "We have tanks and Wolverines, so we should be able to get something done here."

"Alright."

Leon didn't bother looking at the minimap to see where her units were going. As it was, the enemy Arbiter was back, fully upgraded, and he was raging down some of Eddy's Grizzlies. The canister from the Grizzlies did little, either against him or the army of Suicide Grunts. Leon's Scorpions were another matter, and tore into the hostile force.

Partly thanks to the leader powers they'd used, the Red army was mostly dead. That didn't stop the survivors from trying desperately to blow themselves up against the base. Only three of them got close enough to pull it off. A Heavy Supply Pad blew up, but the rest of the base was undamaged.

The Orange army, undeterred, kept on walking toward the base. Clearly they intended to use their rocket power on the main base structure in the hopes of bringing it down. That fact was underscored by four MAC slugs that fell from the sky onto the base, lowering it's health well past the halfway mark.

At this point the Hawks joined the fray, all of them concentrating on the base itself and ignoring the ground units. A Cryo bomb fell on Leon's Wolverines, immobilizing most of them and temporarily disabling many Scorpions as well.

For every ODST they managed to kill, more simply dropped out of the sky to join their brothers. Both Leon and Eddy used their D-bombs (one of which fell on the Arbiter, the other off to the side in an effort to keep the OSDTs from flanking the base), but there were too many free places for OSDTs to drop in. Some of them inevitably got close enough to use their rockets against the base.

It was too much. The base exploded, all the buildings on it going up one by one like firecrackers before the main structure broke up.

"Aw, those mother-"

Leon tuned out Eddy's river of obscenities and tried to focus on exterminating the remaining enemy units. While the composition of the enemy force was good for killing bases, it wasn't so good at fighting a mechanized army. Scorpions and Grizzlies tore up the ODSTs; no matter how many you were able to throw in, there was a limit as to how many could be dropped at once, and in this case the damage done outweighed the reinforcements. Meanwhile the Hawks were blasted out of the sky by Wolverine missiles. The Arbiter didn't last long either; without any experience, he was almost helpless under the rain of canister shells that once more blew him away.

"Calm down, Ed," Leon said somewhat forcefully after listening to fifteen seconds of rage by Eddy. "You can rebuild the damn thing. And you have two other bases, which aren't damaged, I might add."

Eddy told him to do something that was... impossible. Leon tuned that out as well; it was just typical Eddy, being, well, Eddy.

The remaining Hawks withdrew, escaping the devastation that had claimed most of their number. Orange either never got the idea to pull back or he just decided his army was dead in any event. The last ODSTs finally died off, smashed by tank shells and machine gun rounds.

"Well that was fun," Leon remarked. "How are you doing, Luna?"

He got no response.

"Luna?"

He checked the chat status of the party. Just as he'd thought, the Princess had switched to game chat, which was completely separate from normal chat.

"Luna, you still here?" he asked after switching to the same chat mode.

"Oh, hey Leon. Is it over?"

"Yeah, Eddy wore himself out. He'll get over it."

"I hope so. I may be learning about modern methods of speech, but I still hate bad language."

"A lot of us do, but..."

"I know. Well, let's get back to the game."

They both switched back to party chat.

"As I was saying, how far did you get on that attack of yours, Luna?" Leon inquired again.

"Fairly well, as a matter of fact. Look for yourself."

Leon did. Luna had, by herself, managed to completely destroy two bases, one Red and one from Orange, and the only reason she hadn't gone farther was that Orange had realized that keeping his bases was more important than attacking, and he kept throwing ODSTs into the fight. While they were terrible against tanks, ODSTs were harder for aircraft to kill. Red still had a few Vampires, which contributed little due to the fact that most of them had been stasis-beamed by Luna's own Vampires.

Now was the time to attack, to wipe the enemy team out one by one while they were weakened by Luna's attack and from their own failed assault. "You guys up for crushing them?" Leon asked.

"I am crushing them, Luna said in reply, "but some assistance would be nice."

"Yeah, my Grizzlies need more food," Eddy agreed. "Going to wreck this base." A cream-colored ping displayed the base (a green one) Eddy had targeted for destruction.

"Then I'll knock out this one," Leon announced, pinging one of the orange bases.

"Okay."

Leon gave the command, and his army rolled out. In the center of the map, Orange had had the presence of mind to place ODSTs in the shield wall, which would have been a good idea if there had been something like Cobras or Scarabs to help them. There weren't, so a few canister shells later the Scorpions and Wolverines passed by the remains of the infantry who had tried to hold them. Leon was worried that Orange would try to re-man the wall by dropping in more ODSTs; that would likely slice several of his units in half instantly.

Orange did nothing about it. After several seconds of ODSTs not dropping in to retake the wall, he stopped worrying. When he looked over at the battle Luna was currently fighting, his questions were answered. The Orange player had decided it was better to defend his base directly rather than try retaking the shield wall. Well, he was going to pay for it.

He did so in short order. An undefended base was hammered by canister shells and missiles from Wolverine volleys. The base stood no chance. Without a proper army to defend it, there was nothing to stop the mechanized army from wrecking it. Three buildings, all Supply Pads, were obliterated before he concentrated on the main structure. The fortress didn't last long before it broke, all four remaining buildings gone. The only damage Leon had suffered was superficial, inflicted by base turrets, which hadn't been upgraded.

At last, though, a Red army came down the concrete ramp leading to the main bases of the enemy players. This time, Red had gone with a full army of Hunters, which were fully upgraded and began ripping into Leon's Scorpions with their assault beams.

"Aw nuts, guys, Red has Hunters."

"Oh really?" Eddy said incredulously. "I wondered whether they had the brains to get off what they were doing."

Leon dropped a Cryo bomb on the enemy, but got an unpleasant surprise when Rainbow did the same to him, so the majority of both armies were frozen in place. Leon ordered what tanks he still did have to canister the Hunters, which did knock out a couple of them.

Both sides began shooting at one another as soon as the freezing effects died off. Leon lost a couple tanks due to the fact that his units were still frozen for a few seconds after the effect had vanished from the Hunters. He swiftly withdrew from the action. One of his Wolverines was picked off as he fell back.

"Well, I can't go any further without my army being horrendously destroyed," he deadpanned.

"No problem, mate, I have a Carpet bomb ready to go, just go back and I'll blast them."

"Okay, Ed, we'll see how it works out."

Leon sent his units back to re-engage the Hunters. Eddy dropped the Carpet bomb as he'd promised, and several Hunters dropped beneath the barrage of bombs and tanks.

None of that prevented four more MAC slugs from blasting numerous blue tanks apart. Orange had seen and had targeted his army.

Looking at the Hunter army and what was left of his own, Leon decided against continuing the attack. He could win, but most of his army would be dead and of little further value. After healing up and rebuilding he would come back.

Elsewhere, the offensive was going well. Red's entire army had come to fight Leon, and Eddy's Grizzlies were ripping into their base on the other side of the map. The base was doomed; it only took a cursory glance at it to know that. As for Luna, her banshees were blasting away at Rainbow's main base with their fuel rod cannons. The base turrets that had any chance of hitting them had been destroyed, and a Reactor was being brutally chewed up.

Red made his decision. As soon as his expansion base was destroyed, the message "X_Silverfish_X resigned" flashed across the screen, followed by distant explosions as his remaining base blew up and his units instantly died. Orange went down even faster; as his remaining base was attacked, he resigned as well, all seven buildings on his base detonating one by one.

That just left Rainbow Dash. She struggled on as well as she could, but Leon had healed his remaining tanks by now and sent them back in, all the while rebuilding his army.

The game only lasted two more minutes. The end was inevitable.

"Well, that was fun," Eddy said as the green UNSC base blew up and the last of Rainbow's units died.

The word "Victory!" came up on the screen. The game was over.

"Hold on, I'll invite Rainbow Dash," Luna said.

After a minute, the valiant pegasus did actually join. "Ugh," she groaned, "I'm so mad right now."

"What happened?" Leon asked.

"Leon? Is that you? Oh thank heavens. Someone rational. Those two idiots wouldn't listen to a word I said."

"Yeah, especially considering that terrible first attack," Eddy said with amusement.

"I told them not to do that. But did they listen? Nope! Had to threaten to cryo one of their armies just to get them to cooperate. Nearly destroyed my controller with my hooves because I was so frustrated."

"Wow."

"Yeah, wow."

"Why did you party up with them then?" Leon asked.

"They were friends of someone I knew, and they were the only people I could find. It would have been better to wait."

That was something rarely heard from the impatient pegasus pony. "Well, we'll play something where you can join on our side," Luna announced.

"Thanks, Princess."

"Anyone for Battlestations Pacific?" Leon asked. The answer told him all he needed to know. He smiled. It was going to be a good night.

Victoria 2, Game 1 (part 2); Political problems

"Okay, is everyone here?" Leon asked.

"'Ere," Eddy said in a bored tone.

"We are present," Luna stated in an imperious voice.

"Standing at attention!" Shining Armor said enthusiastically.

"...I'm here," Fluttershy mumbled, almost inaudibly.

"Alright," Leon said. Luna, as the host for the game, you have the privilege of starting it."

"It's the one we were on last week, correct?"

"Yes," Eddy confirmed. "It was me playin' Denmark - and getting threatened with war because one of our number can't take criticism properly."

Leon laughed.

"Hmm. Shining was playing as Japan, Luna was playing as China and ripping East Asia apart, and Leo miraculously won a war against Mexico and showed off his leet skills by threatening me.

Leon chuckled again.

"Um, aren't you...?"

"Hmm? Oh, yes, and Flutters was taking an extended vacation in Hawaii."

"Okay, that's everyone. Starting the game... now."

The screen changed to a dynamic loading screen, with flashing paintings presumably from the Victorian Era becoming momentarily visible before the map finally loaded.

Now, Leon thought, Where was I? Ah, yes, the casus belli on Mexico. He checked up on that, and it was still a few weeks away, in-game time, but that would come pretty quick.

"Is everyone ready? I'm going to start time now," Luna announced.

"Ready!"

The dates in the game began moving, and now things could get truly underway. It wasn't long before Leon got his casus belli, and promptly declared war on Mexico.

"Oh, another war, Leon?" Luna asked, sounding interested. "You're being very aggressive for such a small country."

"It's because I'm small that I need to be aggressive," Leon said. "And playing as a major power is boring anyway, because you just steam roll everyone."

"True."

"I'll join if you ask," Shining offered.

"I will, but I don't think you westernized yet, so I doubt you'll be able to reach me."

"Actually I can. I got the reform that allows me to build transports."

"Oh really? What about your army?"

"I have infantry, and plenty of it. It'll be a while before I can get to you, though," the Guard stallion warned, "Clippers are slow."

"You sure you don't need them...?"

"I have enough to annex Dai Viet."

"Alright then, but Mexico is civilized, and their units will be better than yours."

"It'll be a chance to play smarter, in that case."

As the Japanese forces set sail, Leon sent his army - now reinforced to seven brigades, or about twenty-one thousand men, including five infantry brigades, along with one cavalry and one artillery - into Mexico. Sam Houston was still alive, so he was still in charge of the army. A Mexican army tried a counterattack, but Houston's defensive bonus was too much, and the Mexicans fell back in utter disarray.

Suddenly a message rolled up on the screen, accompanied by a sigh of disgust by Luna;

"Russia has declared WAR on The Chinese Empire."

"Oh dear," the Princess moaned. "And I still haven't fully westernized yet."

"You did get the reform allowing infantry, right?" Eddy asked.

"Yes, but I can't build anything else. Ugh, this is going to be a slugging match."

"Why are you complaining?" Leon asked, "There's no limit to your manpower, which is what you have to rely on right now. You could easily throw three hundred brigades, plus hundreds more if you decided to mobilize."

"The manpower isn't the problem; the fact is that they have cavalry and artillery, not to mention an actual navy. I am going to lose an awful amount of money because they'll blockade everything."

"Ah, cutting into your ability to build factories and other industry when you do westernize," Eddy realized.

"Already their armies are starting to occupy Mongolia, and there is a stack of 21 that I am not eager to engage."

"You can call me into the war," Shining offered.

"I'll take it, but can you spare the troops?"

"I have loads," the stallion boasted.

"Well..."

Another message quickly claimed, "Japan has declared WAR on Russia."

"Well this could go badly," Leon muttered.

His own war was going okay, but the U.S. had joined the war on his side. This was a big problem, because when they did, they became the war leader, allowing them to either make or accept peace offers... which Texas would have to abide by. So far, the Mexican armies had been beaten three times trying to attack his army, and the only thing they succeeded in doing was to increase the Texan war score. They had lost one of their provinces to Texan occupation, and another was on the way. New Mexico was going to fall, with Arizona, Nevada-Utah, and California being invaded by the U.S.

Leon began to check up on all the wars. So far, besides the war between him, the U.S., and Mexico, not to mention the massive Asian war that was unfolding, the main conflicts were Britain beating up small Indian substates, the Netherlands going to war against Brunei, France conquering Algeria, and Argentina and Chile going at it hammer and tongs. So far, there hadn't been a major world war yet.

"Japan has declared WAR on Dai Viet."

'Uh, you sure that's wise, Shiny?" Eddy inquired.

"Hey! Only Twilight and Cadence can call me that!" the Guard Captain protested. "And I'm confident that I have more than enough troops to spare in order to beat an uncivilized nation."

"Just saying mate; you have a lot on you plate just now."

"How are you doing, Ed?" Leon asked.

"Who, me? I'm pretty well," the British player said very confidently. "My reforms are coming along nicely, and my tech's growing at a steady rate; I might be able to colonize when Machine Guns becomes available. A Danish Africa would be... Oh, reactionary rebels just popped up in my capital."

"Do you think you can deal with them?"

"Oh yeah, there's just a few of 'em, nothing to worry abou..."

There was a sudden silence. Then...

"Oh, shit."

Over Fluttershy's shocked gasp and Luna's outraged shout, Leon asked, "What happened?"

"They just spawned everywhere! The army's getting destroyed, there's nothing I can do!"

Leon checked his own war. So far, New Mexico had fallen, and Arizona wasn't far behind. The Mexican army was reeling from it's defeats from Texan and U.S. hands; now was the time to take as much territory as possible, before they recovered and the U.S. made a peace deal with Mexico that he didn't want. After several minutes, the war was going well enough so that he could take his eyes off of it.

Most of the red-tinged provinces of Denmark had black lines across them; when he clicked on one of them, it said, "Occupied by Danish Reactionaries."

Aaaaaaaaaaannnnnnd... this is why I'm Conservative. While it was difficult to gain reforms as a Conservative government, it wasn't impossible, and he preferred the Conservative style of government over the Liberal. Reactionaries sought a return to "the good old days," and would stop at nothing to undo reforms and return to a less enlightened type of government, usually absolute monarchy but occasionally something else. Leon chose not to think about his thoughts on politics in real life and focused on the game.

"I'm trying to rebuild the army, but there's too many of them!"

Leon watched as the last few territories of Denmark were taken by black lines.

"No! No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

A message spawned stating that Denmark had switched to an absolute monarchy.

Eddy made several noises; it sounded as if he'd shorted out. Leon could sense that a huge loss of temper was about to happen.

"Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu..."

"Edward, if you swear again, I'll kick you out of the game and I will not let you come back," Luna warned.

The funny noises cut off; Eddy must have turned off his headset.

"Wow, I've never seen him blow up like this," Leon said, deliberately forgetting the fact that he had never seen Ed in real life. "He must have worked pretty hard to get those reforms passed in so short a time."

"Still doesn't excuse the profanity," the Princess said unapologetically. "I meant it when I said I'd kick him."

"You just worry about your war; he'll be back, and he'll have calmed down." Under his breath, Leon added, "Maybe."

He was proven correct. After a minute or two, Eddy came back. He sounded out of breath, as though he'd shouted himself hoarse. Leon suspected he had, and hoped no one else had been in his house - or, preferably, in the neighborhood - when that had happened.

"They reset... every... single... reform... I made since the start of the game," Eddy said weakly. "Everything. Even slavery is legal now."

"Ouch."

"And I have no army now, it all got wiped out by the rebels. If Prussia - if anybody - declares war on me now, I'm dead."

"Try to ally with them."

"I can't; it says, "impossible."

"Well, then, you're... in trouble," Leon finished lamely, remembering Luna's warning. He began to check on the war he'd begun. So far, the Mexican army was avoiding battle, having taken horrendous losses when it had tried to engage. To make matters worse for the enemy, Shining's troops had finally arrived. He hadn't westernized yet, and didn't have the military techs that would have changed the soldier icon for his troops, so a samurai was currently standing on San Francisco.

"Ha, a Japanese invasion of the West Coast; they would have given anything to have done that in World War II," Leon said, finding the situation somewhat ironic.

"How far did they get?" Shining asked.

"In real life? As far as Hawaii when they raided it, but as far as territory captured, they didn't get farther than the Battles of the Coral Sea and Midway."

"Sounded interesting. Maybe we should talk more about history sometime."

"Yeah, but let's focus on the here and now."

"Good idea."

"How's the other war going?"

"Which one?"

"The one with Russia."

Shining sounded a little desperate as he answered, "not all that well. The Russians have artillery and cavalry all over the place, and their navy is blockading just about everything; I couldn't bring reinforcements to the mainland to save my life. The Princess is holding up a little better, but only because she has the numbers on land."

"Ugh, I have lost so many units already," Luna groaned. "Most of my irregulars have been wiped out, and even my best armies struggle against their stacks. Not to mention my people are ungrateful whelps who would put to death the knowledge that would save them."

"I take it your reforms aren't popular?"

"Are you kidding? They're resisting every little thing I do! I can't improve either the military or the economy without some hidebound traditionalists causing trouble. Fortunately I haven't had a big rebellion yet, only small stacks that I can crush easily even in this war, but there are a lot of these small rebellions, and it's going to hurt me badly if I can't put them all down."

"I'm assuming you're broke."

"Not quite, but almost, with the Russians blockading every little piece of shoreline, as Shining Armor said."

"I hope no one else is thinking of joining? On Russia's side, at least?"

"Well, as Japan is an enemy of both the Vietnamese and Russia, I'd say they'll probably form some sort of an alliance eventually. If you're talking about Britain, well, I've been checking up on their relations, and they don't seem to particularly like one another right now. Hopefully something like the Crimean War breaks out so that the Russians have to split their forces."

"Yeah, just about everything important for them is in Europe," Leon noted. "If they lose that, they're dead."

"That's why we're not getting much war score from taking their stuff over here," Shining said, a note of finally understanding something in his voice.

"Uh-huh. Take their capital and they'll holler, but until then they won't care what they lose over there."

"I don't think that's in the cards. Their units are all over here. It's all we can do just to keep them from advancing."

Leon began managing his own war. The war score was good enough that he could add a war goal. He choose to take Arizona in addition to New Mexico.

He began to advance into Mexico proper, knocking out the singular brigades currently in the region, and began taking provinces.

Wait. Didn't I just tell Luna and Shining that taking the capital matters? Nuts to this, I'm going for Mexico City. He switched course and headed for the big red dot on Mexico. He reached it without trouble, but he noticed that the Mexicans had built a fort in the territory, meaning that Mexico City was going to take a long time to fall. He hadn't gotten the research for engineers yet, and frankly didn't use them all too often.

A stack of forty-two thousand came up from southern Mexico, led by Santa Anna, heading straight for him.

"Guys, wish me luck; Santa's coming to town, and he's bringing an entire army with him."

"Huh?" Shining must have been searching on the map, because he was quiet for a few seconds. "Oh, Santa Anna. Yeah, good luck dealing with that. I'll bring my own troops in; it might be a long fight."

"Thanks. You certainly secured San Francisco, at any rate."

The Mexican army collided with his own. Immediately, Sam Houston's soldiers began inflicting heavy casualties. However, there were a lot of Mexican troops, and more scattered brigades were coming in, as if the A.I. had figured out that this was the battle that would decide the fate of the war. Gradually, the tide of battle slowly turned away from the Texans, who nevertheless kept fighting.

The battle lasted for well over a week with the numbers involved. Superior Mexican numbers began to tell, wearing down the Texan forces.

Suddenly, Shining's Japanese troops arrived. With their addition to the Texan forces, the Mexican forces no longer had a telling superiority, and all the while Houston's defense bonus kept hurting them. The battle meter slid more and more to the right, towards victory.

Finally, a post-battle screen came up. The battle was a great victory; over thirty thousand Mexican casualties for somewhat over five thousand allied losses.

"If we didn't put Santa Anna into disgrace with this battle, I don't know what would." Leon said, sighing with relief.

"Considering what he did in real life, he would have deserved it." Shining Armor might not have been as addicted to books and knowledge as his sister, but that didn't mean that he didn't like reading.

"I'm chasing him," Leon said, ordering his army to do just that.

"I don't think that's wise. Sam might be a good defender, but I don't think he's a good leader for attacking."

Leon thought about it, then reluctantly conceded the point. "I guess," he said, cancelling the move. "Can you move your troops to a different province? We're suffering attrition standing on the same tile."

"Oops!" Shining said in surprise. "Sorry." The Japanese troops moved into the region just west of Mexico City. "It's not easy trying to juggle three wars at once," the Guard stallion went on. "I'm never doing that again."

"How's Dai Viet coming along?"

"It's going okay, but it would be going much faster if I was able to bring in more soldiers."

"I wish I could return the favor, but I don't have a navy whatsoever."

"I don't blame you. You have a lot of land to worry about and only a small area of land actually touching the sea. But I appreciate the sentiment," Shining added helpfully.

Leon was about to reply, but before he could, a message came up on the screen; "Mexico has accepted the generous peace terms of The U.S.A."

Leon felt like reaching through the screen and hitting whoever was in charge of the U.S. until he saw what the terms actually said; "Mexico will cede New Mexico and Arizona to Texas. Mexico will cede Nevada-Utah and California to the U.S."

"Well, that didn't go so badly for you," Shining noted.

Leon nodded, even though the pony couldn't see him do so. All things considered, it could have been a lot worse. He'd wanted to get California for access to the sea, but this wasn't so bad either. Another war five years down the road could give him access to the Pacific, and he was willing to wait. His economy was in bad shape as it was; if he didn't fix it soon, he'd go bankrupt.

Just after he'd dismissed the message, the Breech-loading Rifles technology finished.

"Wow, the tech I needed for the war finishes just after it's done."

"What was it?" Luna asked.

"Breech-loading Rifles."

"Ah, yes, that would have helped immensely. I could use it right now," she added wistfully.

Eddy hadn't said anything at all for a while. Leon knew he was still pretty upset about the revolution he'd suffered and probably didn't trust himself to say anything completely clean.

"Hey Fluttershy, how are you doing?" he asked.

"Oh! Um... I guess I'm okay," the shy mare said quietly. "I'm getting economic reforms done, and my people seem to like me."

"Better than mine do," Luna muttered, not quite inaudibly.

Fluttershy stopped talking for a moment, then continued. "I do wish the U.S. and Britain would stop fighting over the whole sphere of influence thing; it kind of makes me nervous."

"As long as they don't drag you into a war of something like that, you're going to be fine," Leon reassured her. "Just be careful, continue you efforts to westernize, and keep an eye on your revolt risk; that should be your only problem."

"Okay. Thanks, Leon."

"Da netra," he answered in Breton; you're welcome.

"Hey Leo, speak something that the rest of us can understand, why don't ya? Instead of speaking French in random places."

Leon answered something foul in Breton.

"You're welcome."

Leon put a lid on his frustration. Remember, he's just got over that damn revolution. It was still hard to take when his heritage was insulted; he had a lot of pride being Breton - who were incidentally Celtic - descended.

"Hey Shining," he asked, "want to call me into the war?"

"I don't think you'll be able to do much, Leon. Even if you started building a navy now, you'd have to travel across half the world just to get to us, and by then the war would probably be over."

"You'd have moral support."

"Well, that would be nice, but I don't think even you could stop their invasion, and I'd hate to see you get invaded by them for our trouble."

"Not to mention that we've lost most of Mongolia to them," Luna added. "We're fighting just to slow them down."

Leon set his research to getting more tax efficiency, then moved his camera to their part of the world. Northern Mongolia was covered with green lines, and Russian armies seemed to be everywhere. They were much smaller in number to their Asian counterparts - or at least smaller than the Chinese - but there were a lot of them.

"I see the problem," he said. He could also see that the Chinese armies far outnumbered the Russians; Luna had at least two stacks of about a hundred thousand soldiers each, with several smaller stacks of fifty thousand roaming around. Shining Armor had two stacks of twenty-one thousand, both taking positions to defend Port Arthur; much of Manchuria had fallen as well.

"If you were able to concentrate your armies," Leon said slowly, thinking out loud, "You could smash the Russians one at a time."

"And what of the attrition?" Luna asked. "We have trouble even with the stacks we are using."

"And how bad will it be if you lose the war? What exactly are they hoping to accomplish?"

"Well," Shining began, we... aw, rats."

"What?"

"Korean nationalists just rose up in..." He stopped as he realized what he had just said. "No, don't any of you say it...!"

"Kekekekeke."

"Darn it, Leon!"

Everyone laughed, even Shining Armor.

"Hopefully, this stupid war will be over soon; I have to get to my nighttime duties very shortly," Luna said.

Leon checked his economy. After the war, he'd managed to straighten things out, and it was now in the positive. He was soon able to pay off the debts he owed, and gave orders to build a couple factories in Texas proper. They were going to be long-term projects, true, but the benefits he could reap from them could be well worth the wait. Cement factories were usually good to start with; other stuff could come later. And, now that capitalists were finally moving in in acceptable numbers, he was probably going to have factories and railroads going up on their own pretty soon.

"Sorry, everyone," Luna apologized a few minutes later. "It's time."

"Well, good game so far," Shining said encouragingly.

"Not for me, I had Reactionaries reverse everything I was workin' for," Eddy said in an annoyed tone.

"I suppose same time next week?" Leon asked.

Again, the answers were affirmative. After everyone exited the game, he got up and stretched. It was good to have friends, and a common interest to enjoy with them.

Crusader Kings 2, Game 3; Republican traditions

"Hey, is this working right?" Starlight asked over her headset.

"Yeah, we can all hear you," Leon replied.

"I'm about to start," Luna said. "So please get yourselves together. Starlight, just be yourself and don't worry. We'll be fine. Have you all created your dynasties and characters?"

"Got mine," Eddy replied. "Alexander Madman ready to go."

"Mario de Lecce, ready," Leon said.

"Glimmering Star, reporting in," Starlight answered.

"Leonardo da Vinci, here," Twilight said.

"And I have Giuseppe Romano," Luna finished. "We're all set. I do find your dynasty flag to be ahead of time, though, Leon."

"It's the Italian flag. And Twilight went and blatantly named her character after a historical figure."

"Hey, am I not allowed to admire a mind who was ahead of his time?" Twilight asked in a teasing sort of manner.

"I'm allowing it," Luna said with finality. "Beginning livestream in three, two, one... and we are live! Greetings, guests. I am Princess Luna of Equestria, and today I have my friends Edward, Leon, Twilight, and, for the first time ever, Starlight Glimmer."

"Cheerio."

"Evening."

"Hello!"

"Um... hi?"

"As you might have noticed, we are playing as Venice... and when I say 'we', I do not - as I so often do - mean it in a royal plural; we're all playing as Republican Patricians. There aren't too many rules, except for not killing the last male member of a dynasty who is able to inherit, and the usual no perpetual occupation of your enemy at 100% war score just to be a troll; otherwise, we can do to each other whatever we please within the game's rules. This is on Ironman, so there is no going back from a decision and achievements can be unlocked."

"So yeah, this playthrough is going to basically be us murdering each other, stealing trade posts, and starting huge feuds for no apparent reason," Eddy said in a cheeky way.

"It will if you choose to play that way," Luna said. "I can't answer for the rest of the group, but I think that some of what you've mentioned my occur. Now, since we're playing in the 700s start, that means the republic's levies are rather weak in numbers. Can I count on you to produce your own house levies and link them to whoever is ruling?"

"Which would be you right now," Leon pointed out."

"Indeed, but I won't necessarily be holding the title long. Unfortunately, we also start as a duchy-level state, and we begin in the Byzantine Empire's de-jure lands. We'll need to survive and hold them off somehow, hopefully without a war. I'd say we'd better get started making money, which is what republics do well."

"Leo's already stolen Venice itself," Eddy complained.

"Oh, what? Ah. I see you've begun building a trade post in our capital before I've even unpaused the game, Leon. What did you do, immediately take a loan and build it as soon as the livestream started?"

"Uh, maybe. That illegal?"

"No, but it was rather quick."

"Well, now I can kickstart my economy a little... once the thing actually finishes building."

"Yes, and in the meantime, I'd say we'd better start the game itself. Speed three, going... now."

Leon clicked on the Republic button in the top left of the screen - a button not normally there unless the player was part of a republic. He'd started with a character in his early forties and a couple of sons to ensure that if one died or was otherwise incapacitated that a capable heir could succeed him. Mario de Lecce was married and had a succession of positive traits, though, in order to make him good as well as younger than fifty, Leon had had to compromise with a number of negative traits - he was a legitimized illegitimate son, he had a lisp, and had other negative traits that somewhat made him less powerful than Leon would have liked Nonetheless, he had good stewardship and diplomacy, and Leon was counting on his councilors to make up for any deficiencies. He also set his wife as the designated regent and the Court Chaplain as Physician.

He was rather pleased that he had been able to take Venice for his first trading post, but the others were already establishing theirs nearby, and the completion for the Adriatic trade posts would be fierce. What Leon really wanted was to establish a city in the county of Venezia itself, which would give him money and some levies and give him a base in case he had trouble conquering counties on the mainland. That would take a lot of money to start, though, not to mention the upgrades later. That meant more trade posts, but he could only build the one, so he'd have to spend money to upgrade his Patrician Palace, which cost upwards of 500 gold. He sighed quietly; had to spend money to make money.

"Are we agreed on where we want to start our conquests?" Luna asked.

"Croatia," Leon and Eddy said at the same time.

"Yeah, I agree," Twilight said.

"Um, I'm not so fluent in human geography; where's Croatia?" Starlight asked.

"That coastal strip of land controlled by the Slavic guy just to the right of us," Leon answered. "We'll have to fabricate claims. Get your councilors ready."

"I agree, Croatia will be our easiest conquest, and perhaps our easiest way to gain the Kingdom level title for Venice, after which anyone possessing a duchy should be able to keep it, though perhaps with the exception of Venice itself. Better to get coastal holdings if possible, for obvious reasons."

"Hopefully the Muslims and the nomads will keep the Byzantines occupied too often to bother with us," Leon pointed out.

"Not to mention all those civil wars they have over succession laws," Eddy agreed. "Yeah, I'd say the ruling player should try to keep the Byzantine Emperor happy... and that we try to stoke the flames inside them, if you get me."

"I can agree, though I won't make it a rule," Luna answered. "I'll have my councilor establish relations with them and try to boost their opinion of us, or at least of me, since I'm the ruler and it's the ruler to ruler relation that generally counts when it comes to international relationships in this game, not of one ruler vs. another's vassal."

"And meanwhile, we conquer the Balkan pagans."

"Indeed. Once we conquer one county, we'll be able to get the rest. Also, I'm going to introduce Limited Crown Authority for more levies, and I'd like you to support it so that I can squeeze some troops out of those mayors and barons we have. It won't affect any of you yet as far as I'm aware, since none of you hold a city at the moment."

"Yeah, I'll go for it," Leon said. "We'll need those men. But we'll either need mercs or we'll need everyone to pitch in with their palace levies, since the ruler cannot control those personally."

"Yes, we'll need them. It's also the highest crown authority can get under a republican system."

"I'll sign it once it comes my way," Leon replied. "Now, any tax on city vassal, on the other hand..."

"...I see. Well, in any case, we all have a trading post, so we should have decent money flowing in, and we'll be able to finance future results."

Leon clicked on the option to approve the Low Crown Authority law. "Anybody got a claim yet?"

"No," Twilight answered. "It's way too soon to expect them to come up with something. We'll just have to be patient."

"And keep Italy happy, otherwise they might embargo us."

"Well, yeah, that might be trouble. We can declare war for cities where we have trading posts, but I think Luna would prefer to just gain the county, if not the duchy, in one fell swoop."

"Indeed," Luna replied. "I'd rather not have to wage three different wars; one for the city, one for the county, then another for the duchy, all taking place some ten years apart from each other due to peace treaties."

"We could each wage war individually," Leon suggested, "using loans and mercenaries, as well as our being under the protection of Venice, to take what we please."

"That's so, but in any case we need a solid start, and the claiming of the Most Serene Republic of Venice. At least we can on to that if we decide that swearing fealty to the Byzantine Emperor is better than extinction."

"Yeah, but that's going to mess everything up," Leon said. "I'd vote for that only under the most extreme circumstances."

"Which is why we'd better start our conquests right now, or as soon as possible, so that we have options."

Leon watched as the game began to unfold. He set the Kings of West Francia and Lombardy as interesting characters, along with the Byzantine Emperor and the Pope. And... "Oh hey, the Abbasids just declared war on the Byzantines."

"That's interesting," Luna replied. "Hopefully, that will keep them out of our hair for as long as the war lasts."

"I'm going to try to assassinate the Emperor," Eddy said. "If we kill him, maybe things will get really messed up."

"I doubt you'll get far, and if you get discovered and become Doge... I'd prefer if you didn't do something so foolish."

"What can you do? It's not like you can arrest me for it."

"Not yet, anyway..."

"Probably not a good time, Ed," Leon advised. "Even if they're losing to someone else, the AI will spare some troops for us if we end up going to war, see if they don't."

"Ahhhh, you guys are no fun."

"You can have 'fun' with the Byzantines later, after we get some land other than a lonely island that for some reason is a de jure part of the Byzantine Empire instead of Italia," Leon answered. "Anyway, even in the meantime, we just build trade posts everywhere and get the money we need to expand, hire mercenaries, and gradually blow away the competition."

"Errrgh, fine."

Leon zoomed out and began scanning the world for events and characters of interest. The king of Middle Francia had mysteriously died early, as seemed to always happen, and Charles had taken his kingdom for his own. The French Renaissance hadn't yet begun, but it likely would soon. Britain, as was usual in early starts, was fractured and would probably be so for the rest of the game, as were the states that, in real world history, would become Russia.

"Oh, watch out in case the Vikings decide to raid us," Leon said. "I don't think they'll resist a rich target like us forever."

"I don't think they'll be bothering us too much, not if they have affairs of their own back home," Eddy replied.

"Maybe not, but if we're busy and they get an army onto our island, we're going to have problems."

"I don't think it'll be a very big problem, at least not at first," Luna said. "I think Edward is correct on this one; with a possible Francia in the mix, and infighting amongst themselves and other groups, and I think they'll be very busy. Unfortunately, Vikings aren't the only people who can raid overseas now."

"Yeah, Berber cultures in Northern Africa can raid now too," Twilight spoke up. "They might, in fact, be more problematic than the Vikings, given the geography and how close and how far each culture group is from us respectively."

"Yeah," Leon agreed. "I'd forgotten about them. I hope the Pope calls for a crusade against the south."

"He's going to go for the Kingdom of Jerusalem first," Luna stated. " He usually does. Unless the Muslims invade Italy itself and take Rome, or become a significant threat "

"I hope that first doesn't happen; invasion of Rome, that is," Leon said. "That would be bad for everyone involved in our republic."

"Indeed. That's why I think it would be best if we join Lombardy, or Italy if that renaissance happens, if the Muslims do invade. They might not, but we ought to be prepared."

"Best way to do that is get money and build up our palaces," Ed replied.

"Couldn't have put it better myself. And hopefully, we can get a claim in Croatia soon."

"Trying, but my guy is just standing there, doing nothing," Leon said. "Other than looking around and stuff."

"Oh, by the way, how did that job interview go, Leon?" Luna asked.

"It didn't. I went down to the local burger joint, but there were already five guys working there, so the all the job slots were full up."

"Oh, dear. I'm so sorry to hear that."

"Oh well. Wasn't a total loss. I got to buy lunch there, and man are their burgers good."

Leon continued looking for events to monitor after repaying the debt he owed to the Jewish moneylenders. West Francia was at war with Saxony, and, to Leon's joy, soon captured and burned the Germanic holy site that Saxony held. Meanwhile the war between the Abbasids and the Byzantines had largely stalemated; although the attackers had five percent war score from capturing a holding, when Leon went to check the levies each ruler had at their disposal, the balance slightly favored the Byzantines, by a margin of about 1,900 - 2,200.

Of more concern was the invasion of Bavaria by the pagan Bohemians. That was an action close enough to easily affect the republic very soon, and while having nearby powers weakened would be to Venice's benefit, Leon wasn't pleased with this. Meanwhile, Asturias in Spain was in the process of being eaten by the Umayyids, who ruled virtually all of the Iberian peninsula. Leon wasn't pleased at the prospect of France being invaded in the near future, especially from the south, but at least that was relatively far away. Relatively.

"Oh! Got a claim!" Eddy said loudly.

"Oh really?" Luna replied, excited. "Where?"

"On that little province just in the middle of the de jure Croatian duchy."

"Ah. I think that might be a decent first target. We'll have to fight another war sometime after that, but it shouldn't provide us with much of a problem."

"We could just try to assassinate the guy in charge after this war is over, and then declare holy war on his successor," Leon suggested. "Truces in this game are only between rulers, not countries."

"I suppose we could try, but I doubt that we'll find anyone in Croatia willing to join us."

"Right, raise your levies and ships and ferry them over to the province in question once we declare war," Luna said. "Best to start conquering as soon as possible, while the Empire is off fighting in the east. Hopefully they remain busy for a while."

Leon waited until Luna declared war, then raised his own levies and ferried them over to Croatia, on the province Luna had wanted. "I hope their buddies in the Balkans don't join them..."

"A little too late for that," Luna sighed. "A couple of other chiefs have joined already. This might be harder than we thought. Any mercenaries we can raise would be nice."

"Got some," Eddy said. "Cheapest I could find."

"Even a mere 1,500 men would help immensely right now," Luna responded. "Send them over. Oh, and everyone please have their armies set to auto-follow mine."

Leon did so. "How have things been going in Equestria since we last visited?"

"Oh, they have been going splendidly! The air show was a fantastic success, with the funds from it going directly into a children's hospital, which the money has helped very nicely. In fact, the Wonderbolts will be going on tour in similar events in the near future, given how the first was received. In other news, the Equestrian navy launched it's first modern cruiser a couple of days ago, with three more expected to finish in three months. And my sister and I were able to go out together for a hooficure and a nice dinner last night, which was a decent break from our regular duties."

"Ah, good."

"Unfortunately, I had to explain to some African diplomats that hiring pegasi to control their weather would not work, as clouds in your world are... Well, I've tried making clouds, and they just don't... stick right, I'm not sure how to explain it to non-pegasi. Our hooves more or less just go right through them."

"Huh," Leon grunted. "I didn't really think about that as a possibility. The idea of hiring pegasi to control weather in our world, I mean."

"Well, now you know why it's not a feasible idea. That isn't to say that I refused to offer some measure of assistance; I did offer financial aid as a means of compensation. As well, Saddle Arabian and Saudi Arabian diplomats have been arguing; I caught some of their diplomats shouting at each other in the palace, and though I cannot speak Arabian, it was clear they were at odds, given how loud they were shouting."

"Did they tell you what they were arguing about?"

"The Saudi ambassadors claimed that the Saddles offered them... well, pig meat," Luna said, clearly discomforted.

"Oh, that wouldn't go over well."

"It didn't. The Saudis blew up over the event, accusing the Saddles of deliberately offering them unclean food. The Saddles, in their turn, were insulted that their hard work to appease the human ambassadors and insisted it was a misunderstanding. At least, that's what the translators were able to make out over the shouting. Eventually, I had to put my hoof down and threaten to declare the members of both parties persona non grata in order to get the two sides to stop. Still, the bad feelings have endured. I hope to put an end to this squabble soon."

"Yeah, the Muslim world really doesn't like pigs," Leon said, as the combined Venetian armies managed to overcome a group of enemy armies that had attacked them. "In fact, part of one episode was censored in Arabic-speaking countries because it featured a pig licking Sweetie Belle's leg and hoof."

"Wait, really?"

"I can confirm that," Eddy answered. "I've got a buddy in the military who watches the show who is currently overseas. He speaks Arabic, and he told me that piece of the episode is flat out gone. Not very much of the episode, mind you, so you wouldn't be missing much, but it's out."

"Muslims consider pigs unclean, as in, spiritually unclean," Leon continued. "They're not supposed to eat or even touch them, one of the few things they agree about with Jewish people. I think the idea was that the censors believed that Sweetie being licked by the pig would have made her unclean, so it was cut."

"Ah. I'll make a note to be very careful on that matter in the future. And speaking of unclean, is pork or ham unclean to you, Leon? Never heard of you touching it."

"Nope," Leon replied. "Christians know that all foods have been deemed clean. I just don't like the taste. I prefer beef. But anyway, I think it might be a good idea to stop horrifying a good number of our audience by ceasing this particular conversation."

"Hmmm? Oh, yes," Luna said, remembering. "A good deal of our audience is made up of ponies, and perhaps other species that might not take too kindly to the idea of... well, anyway..."

Leon was pleased that the way the war was going. Even though Eddy would be the one empowered by this, he also had claims going, and it wouldn't be long before he had counties of his own.

"How is the technology front going, Luna?" Twilight asked.

"I'll tell you once I have enough points for something beyond the basics. In the meantime, please be patient. And we all have a war to finish, I might add."

"Oh, right."

"And don't worry about Edward getting a county; I'm going to play this fairly so long as I am Doge."

"Which may or may not last long, I might put in," Starlight said, speaking up for the first time in a while. "These two knuckleheads," she added affectionately, referring to Leon and Ed, "might kill you in order to seize the throne, or whatever Republics use instead of one."

"Why would you think that?" Leon asked innocently, who in fact had thought briefly about it and was currently plotting to kill Eddy's character, who was more likely to become Doge after Luna's character died.

"Yeah, who do you think you are?" Eddy asked in a similar tone.

"Settle down," Luna replied, though clearly amused. "besides, I think we all know who would be the winner for such a struggle."

"Yep," Ed said confidently.

"...And it is not Edward!"

"What the...? Why have I been jailed?"

"My spymaster found out what you were up to," Luna answered, giggling. "While the rules we set may allow for us to plan to kill each other, they don't prevent the ruler from jailing you for trying."

"Let me out! Please!"

"Maybe later. For now, I have a war to finish for your claim. Leon, do you have any ambitions in Croatia?"

"Well, I wanted to, but if Ed's going to get Croatia, I want Carinthia."

"Which is controlled by Italy and Bavaria," Luna answered, sounding concerned. Are you sure...?"

"Look, if me and Ed try to split Croatia between us and maybe someone else, that will lead to war between us at some point, even if Ed denies it. I'd rather have clearly defined borders, even if I have to take fewer coastal provinces and a couple castles as opposed to cities."

"Oh, I see. You think that Duchies and Kingdoms should largely be made up of their de jure borders?"

"Yeah, pretty much. It makes me crazy how there's no button to force vassals to accept their de jure borders."

"You realize that if that option was available to the player, it could be used by the AI, as well? And it could be abused. All too easily."

"I guess so. I just don't like irregular borders."

"I can relate. But that's the nature of this game; lords and kings get claims and then press them. These things happen."

"And meanwhile, I'm rotting in jail and angry."

"Well, Edward if you'd like the oubliette better, I'm sure I could provide..."

Ed was noticeably silent.

"I thought so. just be glad that republican leaders need a reason to jail people, unlike monarchs, who can imprison whoever they want, albeit with a tyranny penalty. Otherwise, I might feel tempted to imprison every character you became to prevent attempts on my life."

"Is there a way to continue our expansion without incurring the wrath of the Byzantine Emperor?" Starlight asked.

"Not much. The only way we're going to get out from being a de jure part of the Empire is to form our own, or become part of another. The former would take in game centuries in our condition to accomplish."

Leon looked away from the war as it began to fall into it's ending stages, watching as West Francia concluded it's war with the Saxons, utterly annexing them. It would be a difficult, uphill struggle for Venice, which did not come with the military assets that West Francia now had, much less the Byzantines. Money only went so far, and while retinues could solve some problems, they cost money, and lots of it, to reinforce, along with a small but still annoying amount for upkeep. It was easy to fall into debt if one's retinues suffered severe losses in a war.

An event suddenly flashed in front of him. "Oh, West Francia suddenly becomes Francia," Leon noted.

"Indeed," Luna said. "It might have been better for us if they remained divided, but the Umayyids will face a stronger resistance."

"Of course, this new empire will suffer from gavelkind succession for a long time," Leon stated. "That'll mean trouble each time one of their rulers dies."

"Oh naturally. I dislike Gavelkind myself, considering it splits one's holdings between one's offspring upon death. I prefer primogeniture as well, although being able to pick and choose one's heir in the republican system certainly has it's perks."

"Yeah, it does... assuming you manage to have kids who survive until you die," Leon replied. "I'd suggest getting a hospital up as soon as possible to allow that to happen."

"That will help as long as your houses remain in Venice itself," Luna answered. "But once you get holdings outside of our little island, I think you will need to build your own."

"That goes for you as well," Leon said. "You're not remaining in control of the Republic forever."

"I'm fully aware of that, though the hospital aspect of that didn't catch up with me until you reminded us. Ah, finally,100% war score."

The county they'd been fighting for switched to Venetian cyan. Leon checked it; it was entirely under Ed's control, though the Briton quickly gave away the castle and church to vassals.

"Yes! Score one to the Madman!"

"Who is still imprisoned, I might add," Luna put in, amused.

"Well, if you'd let me go..."

"I might... assuming you paid your debt to society..."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, in market jargon, 'pay up, sucker'."

Leon laughed.

"Se what happens to you when I'm out," Eddy muttered. "Fine, I'll pay the money once I get it. In the meantime, you have me stuck with a -1 health penalty, so-"

"No, I'm not letting you get out from under me via house arrest. We're all aware of the availability of escape that warrants."

"Rrrrrr... Okay, sending you the offer... now... What? HOW ON EARTH DID I JUST DIE?"

Leon had to try immensely hard not to laugh; his plan to assassinate Alexander Madman had gone through before the request for release in exchange for gold had been agreed to by Luna, and now the somewhat decent character had been replaced by a 10 year old child, setting him back at least six years, and most likely much more, toward gaining the throne. And the best part was that Leon's part in the other's demise had gone undetected.

"Well, I wasn't expecting that," Starlight admitted.

"YOU EXECUTED ME!"

"No, Edward, I did not!" Luna insisted angrily. "If you hover your mouse over the skull next to your deceased patron, you'd realize that someone planned to kill you and succeeded."

There was a pause.

"Yeah, you're right, somebody bumped me off and left me with a kid as and heir. Great. When I find out who did this, their days of soft living are OVER for the rest of the game."

"Remember the rules?" Luna cautioned.

"Oh, I will. That won't stop me, though."

Leon decided not to comment on the situation he'd caused. "I've got a claim on Istria."

"Well, even if we did decide to go after that, Leon, you would most likely get a castle as opposed to a city, unless it gets taken over by pagans at some point."

"Well, that could happen. Bohemia is currently at war with Bavaria, and they are currently winning."

"Where is Francia at?" Twilight asked. "I thought they would help their fellow Catholics in Bavaria."

"Rebellion," Starlight replied. "Some Widukind guy or something is at war with Charlemagne."

"Oh, right, I'd forgotten about him," Twilight admitted. "Saxon rebellion for independence, with Widukind becoming ruler if he wins, and a prisoner if he doesn't."

"I'm hoping he gets the shaft," Leon said. "The Germanic religion will suffer a significant weakness if they lose it permanently to Francia, which means the Vikings remain disunited due to gavelkind, a situation they would only be able to change by reforming their religion."

"Well, it might go either way," the purple unicorn stated. "All of Widukind's troops are event spawned, meaning once they die, they're gone forever."

"Whether or not he wins, it doesn't have much to do immediately with us," Luna said. "We need to continue our efforts to expand, building up our capital city and our commercial empires, along with small retinues; a single unit of 250 each ought to do to start off with."

"We don't have that much money to start off with," Leon reminded her. "We're going to have to build more trade posts and upgrade our palaces to get some decent gold."

"We'll probably be able to acquire Croatia - the kingdom, as well as the duchy - and it's surrounding lands relatively easily," Twilight noted. "I'd advise taking some stuff that aren't de jure pieces of the Byzantine Empire; if there are rebellions in Italy, we should make grabs for counties there."

Leon again began to look for action elsewhere. Not much had changed, though the Saxon war was still ongoing. The fight between the Byzantines and the Abbasids was 50% in the former eastern Roman Empire's favor. The Kingdom of Asturias in northern Spain had been reduced to it's namesake duchy of two small counties, and it probably wouldn't last much longer. And, while there was some measure of chaos in Russia, the Kingdom of Rus had been founded, so it wasn't hard to imagine them possibly becoming powerful later on.

More trade posts were completing, a couple of them being Leon's own. Unfortunately, they were all he could build at the moment, but at least the money he'd get from them would make it easier to upgrade his palace. In the meantime, each trade post gave it's owner a claim to a city in the county they'd been built in, creating potential targets for the Republic.

"I hope these trade posts are worth it," Starlight said. "A good city - even a good castle - would probably get more gold than them, for now, at least."

"Good castles are hard to come by at the moment," Luna answered. "And while one trade post might not be enough, a bunch of them are worth it, in spite of the cost. Let's focus on the positives; our claims and what we can do with our treasuries."

"Another war for Croatia might be good."

"For you, perhaps, Edward. But the rest of us would like duchies that are mostly coastal as well."

"Duchy. One. You get Venice every time you get elected, and if you have two when you're elected everyone as -10 relations for having too many duchies."

"Oh, you know, I really didn't think of that. Of course, I could just delete the Venice duchy title once we're big enough, but that's probably a long way in the future."

"We're going to need to expand in the de jure Kingdom of Croatia anyway," Leon pointed out. "Unless someone wants to wait for in game centuries to pass, we're going to have to take some territory even if we give it away to random people anyway."

"I concur," Starlight added. "I'll take Bosnia, if we get it some time soon."

"Alright, but we're not going after Serbia yet," Luna said. "I want a barrier between us and Rome- I mean the Byzantines, to keep the heat off of us."

"They're going to expand northeast," Leon said. "Unlike most settled nations, they can just strongarm most of the nomads prior to the Mongols, and by the time the Mongols show up they'll have the levies to at least inflict some significant measure of damage to their event-spawned units. They might expand slightly into the Middle East, but the easiest pickings will be the nomads."

"That's been my experience as well," Twilight noted. "Of course, they'll have problems in keeping that land, as they'll need to build cities and castles just to keep it, but the AI usually finds a way to do it. Let's try and make our own kingdom and hopefully empire in the western Balkans."

"How do we determine who get's what, though?" Luna asked. "Even if the landlocked duchies we can get are captured, how do we decide?"

"Just send the biggest bribe," Eddy offered.

"No. I think the poorest Patrician family - the one with the fewest trade posts - will receive priority."

"Which would be me at the moment," Starlight noted. "I don't have that much, and I'm not very experienced with republics; in fact, this is my first time playing as one. I've been more of an autocrat, really."

Huh, the pony closest to being her world's first communist is pro-autocracy. Surprising- Leon shoved the thought aside violently, imagining it shattering off-screen in his mind as he did so. It was unfair, and, more to the point, unforgiving. Starlight had tried her heart out redeeming herself, and the fact that she could just sit down and play games with people she hadn't met very long ago was part of the proof. Leon felt somewhat ashamed of his former opinions about her, and hoped others would change their opinions as well. "Understandable," he said in reply. "I don't think most of us make good puppets for councils anyway."

"I hear that; I never bought the Conclave DLC," Twilight said.

"I don't think any of us have, or will unless it is modified," Luna replied. "It's broken. 'Faction to empower the council,' 'war to empower the council,' 'demand for council to be empowered,' it's disgusting. I'm the ruler, not some figurehead, and my vassals aren't getting one. I'm fine with giving them money and titles, but they aren't going to restrict or control me."

"A poor mentality for a republican ruler," Leon quipped.

"Yes, well, it's more of a republican dictatorship, and it's not a democracy in the sense of the common people really doing much. In fact, it's about how much prestige you have, how old you are, and how much money you pour into the campaign fund, not the will of the people or even your fellow Patricians."

"Yeah, but your powers are still limited. You can't imprison people without 'cause'. As if being in a faction about to fire isn't reason enough even in a monarchy."

"I can understand that, though unfortunately it counts as tyranny if you arrest them. Ugh. And besides, you agree with me. You said you like having power in this game too."

"Pretty much."

"Hey, I'm gonna throw a party for everyone to come carousing, does anyone want invitations?" Starlight asked.

"Can't go," Eddy replied. "I'm still a kid."

"Sure," Twilight said eagerly.

"No problem," Leon answered.

"I've love too," Luna said.

"Alright. Sending the invitations."

Leon received his, and a couple in game months later - which amount to perhaps fifteen to twenty seconds of real time - he was a guest at Starlight's private party, along with the other players sans Ed, and a number of AIs.

"I hope I can get the Game Master trait from this," Leon stated. "It's kinda something I'd like to get; I'm hoping to be able to play the tabletop strategy game Dystopian Legions with a local group in real life."

"Nerd," Eddy said in a searing way.

Leon's wish wasn't granted; instead, an event came up that said that he got in a fight with Luna.

"Oh dear. Well, rather than get craven, I'm going to fight this one out, Leon."

"Me too. Bring it!"

A moment later, Leon checked his character; the attribute "beaten up" appeared.

"Drat, we were both beaten up," Luna said discontentedly. "That won't do well for our relations."

"Ooooh, sorry, you two. I got into a game with Starlight, though she won," Twilight said, "and... Oops, that event came up a little too fast... did you really just imprison me, Starlight?"

"Sorry," the pink unicorn apologized, "but you slit a servant's throat and I wanted the Just trait."

"That was an accident! I clicked on that without meaning to!"

"Well, looks like you're in jail for now. Not like I can just let a murderer to be on the loose," Starlight answered.

"You could offer to ransom me."

"I could," Starlight mused, in an interested voice. "On the other hoof..."

"...What?"

"Hold on, you'll see in a moment..."

"Hey, what are you...?"

"Here we go!"

"What!? No, no, no, no, I am not just giving you my trade post. I'll fight your plan."

"Hmm. Sad. You'll likely end up paying a lot more to resist it, and, looking at your profile, you only have enough money to resist for a while, after which you'll either end up in debt, probably for a very long time, or you'll simply give up. On the other hoof, give it over without resistance, and I'll release you without even requiring you to pay a cent."

"That was an accidental click! This would be totally legit if I had made that decision on purpose, which I didn't!"

"And how can I tell? You're in front of a computer monitor, not face to face with me. How do I know the death of that servant was an accident?"

"Because we know each other in real life, and you know that the real me would never do that!"

"But how do I know that your in game character wouldn't?"

"Because... well, I... Okay, yeah, I doubt my character in this game would be an exact copy of me... even if I could play as a female Patrician, which is sadly impossible in this game. Fine. But Don't think I won't take it back sometime."

"Oh, I never doubted you'd try. It's a deal, then."

"It is. But only for now."

Leon chuckled quietly. He had designs on some of Starlight's own posts, and when he was able to upgrade his palace more - he had managed to upgrade it by one level by now - he would have a chance to strike.

"Hmmm," Luna hummed to herself. "The time has passed rather quickly, as it seems to do."

"Aw nuts," Eddy said. "Don't tell me-"

"I'm afraid so. It's nearing dinnertime in Equestria, and I will have to raise the moon, after which I have duties to take care of such as Night Court."

"Aw, blast it!"

"Don't worry, I'll be available for another game tomorrow. Sorry to have brought that bit of bad news upon everyone so suddenly."

"it's alright," Twilight answered. "I had fun. And we all have stuff to do as well."

"Yeah, Twilight's told me about a spell that lets you literally go into a book," Starlight said. "I want to at least try that once."

"I guess it's about time," Leon agreed reluctantly. "And I do have a history report that's due in a few days."

"Bah, I guess I'll sleep, since it's hours after dinner for me," Eddy said. "Or I'll look up let's plays on Youtube. Whichever takes my fancy."

"Okay then. I'm saving the game," Luna added. "We'll be able to return. And now to our viewers, I bid you all a good night."