Somewhere, out there in the cosmos, there is a tiny, nameless planet upon which exists the small nation of Equestria. Populated mainly by colorful bipedal horses, who knew little of suffering and even less of darkness, this was a land of harmony. Watched over by their princesses, the people who called this place home were generally sunny, cheerful and cared not for the more grim aspects of life.
But far away from civilization, at the edge of a forest deep and terrible, lay an exception to this generality. Here, surrounded by strange creatures, was a witch’s cottage, and within those four walls was the sorceress herself, Fluttershy. The tall, stick-thin woman looked from a distance, to be an old crone, but upon closer inspection, it was revealed that not only was she young, she was also beautiful.
Though it didn't help matters that she looked like she ate children, owned only rags, and smelled like a mixture of wolf piss, and swamp fumes. So with that in mind, you perhaps wouldn't be surprised to discover that she was in the middle of a spell. Dark, forbidden magics, coupled with blood freely given upon a crimson six-pointed star dominated the center of her small abode.
“Thoir dhomh bràmair a tha gu math teth, feuch, mas e do thoil e!” She chanted, throwing her arms into the air while crying out the final word of her incantation.
The crimson circle flashed, and the blood burned away, leaving behind an acrid stench. And then there was nothing, with the only sound being Fluttershy’s faint breathing. For several long seconds, she stood motionless, wondering silently what she had done wrong.
And then there was a flash of green and a puff of red smoke that filled the center of the room. From sulferous smog strode a tall, creature that seemed to be made up of a dozen different strange and fantastical beasts. He had one leg of a dragon, another of a goat, and the arm of a lion, while its twin resembled the talons of a bird of prey. His tail was that of a lizard, while his torso had a leather texture and above it all rose the neck and head that were distinctly horse-like. Even his pupils were different sizes, while his maw was filled with various kinds of teeth, all taken from predators both land dwelling and ocean born. Only the twin appendages atop his head were the same, though the curling ram’s horns pointed off in different directions.
“Did someone call for the doctor of destruction?” He exclaimed, stepping forward with a wide smirk. “Perhaps you are looking for the prince of persuasion? Or maybe it was the king of chaos you were calling? The baron of bastards? The grand puba of the tuba?”
“Y-yes! I was calling you!” Fluttershy blurted out.
“Oh good, then I didn't take a wrong turn at Albuquerque again,” the demon proclaimed, ducking into a bow. “Discord is this demon’s name, what manner of evil do you have on your mind?”
Fluttershy opened her mouth, only for a pawed hand to force it close.
“No, wait let me guess,” Discord interrupted. “Let me see here…”
He turned slowly in a circle, ducking low and then standing as tall as his strange legs would allow him.
“You reak of poverty but I don't think it is riches you seek, this seems to be a choice on your part,” Discord murmured. “The dark aesthetic lends itself to thoughts of murder. Maybe revenge? Ah, that's it! You wish for me to kill off some former bully or perhaps a partner that spurned your advances? Well, you need only give me a name and they will be deader than disco!”
“N-no, that's not it,” Fluttershy replied.
“Hmm alright then let me try again,” Discord muttered, his face contorting. “I don't see any signs of a partner. No pictures on the wall, your bed is tiny, and your only company seems to be an inordinate amount of cats as well as other woodland creatures…”
“Aha!” Discord exclaimed, snapping his fingers. “You wish for me to beguile someone for you! Some large-chinned Chad no doubt. Wait, what would the Equestrian equivalent be? Football Mc Largeshoulders? Whatever.”
“I don't want that either,” Fluttershy replied.
“Then… what do you want?” Discord muttered in confusion.
“I want you,” Fluttershy declared.
“You…” Discord blinked and looked around, only now aware of the large sign above the doorway that had the words ‘Proud Monster Fucker’ printed on it in bold font. “How did I miss that?”
Discord leaped to the side, narrowly avoiding Fluttershy’s attempt to grab him around the waist.
“Now I am not against a little cavorting with mortals but my spawn lord always told me two things. Never invest in crypto, and never put your various genitalia in crazy,” Discord declared.
“Then does that mean I can put it in you then?” Fluttershy asked while creeping toward the demon.
“Wait you have a-? Nope, doesn't matter, no means no,” Discord retorted.
The demon followed up his rebuttal with a fireball that detonated with enough force to blow out one of the walls of Fluttershy’s cottage. The woman herself briefly disappeared, buried under the shattered and partially scorched remains of her home.
“Well this has been fun but I think I’m going to go back to starting psyops on Twitter. The free money glitch trend earned me a promotion. See ya around, toots!” Discord exclaimed.
The demon was about to walk back over to the circle when he noticed movement within the smoking timber and burnt planks. From amidst the devastation rose a familiar shape. The woman sat up stiffly, the motion oddly unnatural, almost robotic. Then her head turned, and her gaze locked onto Discord. The moment their eyes met, the creature of sulfur and sin felt a rare moment of fear.
“Oh crap,” he murmured.
Without thinking, the demon turned and ran, sprinting off into the woods at speeds few mortals could replicate. Weaving through the woods at a breakneck pace he dodged the various obstacles with an uncanny dexterity. Over a creek, then a chasm, and finally he slowed down at the edge of a deep ravine, only stopping after he was certain he was alone.
“Haven't had to run like that in a while. I really shouldn't skip leg day,” Discord murmured, grinning to himself. “Now to circle back, and disrupt the ritual so I can go back to… what in the hell?”
Fluttershy strode through the woods with an unnaturally deliberate pace. Though she was barely moving faster than a brisk walk she had somehow kept pace with the demon’s supernatural alacrity. Her arms bolt straight at her sides, she strode toward him, her eyes flashing with dark intention.
“Okay now that is just plain spooky,” Discord declared. “Freaky walk or not, nothing beats magic.”
With a snap of his claws, Discord was back in the cottage where he had first entered this world.
“Well that was weird,” he muttered to himself.
He turned around and was about to take a step forward when he noticed that he was not alone. Standing only a few short feet away was his summoner, the witch, Fluttershy.
“How in the hell did you do that?” Discord exclaimed, throwing up his arms.
“Are you going to keep making this difficult?” Fluttershy asked, walking towards him. “Or are you going to be a good pet, and do as mommy asked?”
“Normally I’d be down for the whole mommy thing but it's just not a good time right now ya know?” Discord exclaimed, chuckling nervously and backing up. “I just got a lot going on and I was making a cake before you summoned me and I don't wanna burn that.”
“Someone is being naughty,” Fluttershy interrupted. “Does mommy have to get out her collar and leash?”
“I…” Discord began, only to pause and shrug. “Eh, who am I kidding? I’m doing nothing today anyway. Come on Mommy, show this disrespectful kitten what you got.”
Author's Note
This is part of the countdown to christmas, head over here to keep track of all the cool stuff coming down the pipes. If you want to ensure I can afford to keep doing stuff like this, consider backing me over on Subscribestar or Patreon.
