Presence of Mind, Absence of Body

Twilight stares at the album. It’s more like a five volume encyclopedia anyways. It would take hours to go through properly. She knows it as she does that occasionally. She’s not going through it for fun right now, though. She has seventeen moons left. It’s been well over a year. Each night documented in excruciatingly beautiful detail.

She wonders if she’s fallen in love with herself. She loves looking at her face, tracing the lines of her smiles and her frowns. She loves they way her body has become more and more blackened by his ink. The debauched corruption of her mind and her smile visibly reflected in the dark, erotic lines that seem to grow with each turn of the page.

There’s power in her tattoos. He hasn’t been inking her solely for fun, but she only recently realized. What a clever application of magic. It was like cutie mark magic, but far more pointed. She laughed when she finally realized it. He was still trying to break her.

It was almost cute.

She hadn’t told him that she’s pretty sure that she’s immune to his tattoo magic. After all, she might not actually be. But she knows it’s not working like he wants. Nothing does when it comes to her. He keeps trying to bend her or make her perfectly loyal. And she’s not. Not by a long shot.

Not that there hasn’t been some effect from all this; although she’s increasingly of the opinion that it’s not magical in nature. She’s become an absolute sexual degenerate and she’s eagerly indulging her desires with him. She’s actually happy when she gets to indulge his desires. That’s what friends do, after all.

He doesn’t think they are friends. Not like she does. But that’s okay. She can feel something from him lately that’s not just his cold desire to control her or his limitless sexual hunger.

She smiles as she traces the newest tattoo, a strangely looking flame just over her belly. It’s a heart. She didn’t ask for a heart. He simply chose one. That fact makes her feel warm and tingly. He cares about her in some strange alien way, and he’s trying to show her.

Even if the heart was intended to manipulate her, the goal would be to make her love him. She’s tried to explain love to him. Intellectually, he understands. But emotionally, he doesn’t. Regardless, she can tell he’s lonely. And she’s the only friend he’s ever had.

She scans the pages, finding the one she wanted. It was a shot of her back. There they were. Her friends.

Twilight’s hands softly caress the picture, wishing she could feel them. It’s the best shot of her back in the book, the highest detail picture she can get of their cutie marks. She’d convinced Sombra to tattoo them on her, and now she had a little section on her lower back with balloons, diamonds, lightning bolts, butterflies, and apples. None of them are properly colored, but even in the black ink, they are there.

It’s as close as she can get to her friends anymore.

Tears well up in her eyes as she swallows them back down. Normally this is one of the thoughts she doesn’t entertain. Another book hidden away in her library of thoughts she shouldn’t have. But right now she is lonely.

So she pulls the book off the shelf in her mind, and opens it wide. Today is a day where she will cry.

Is Rainbow performing right now? Has her season gone well? Has she finally asked Applejack out in a meaningful way? Is Fluttershy taking car of her animals? Is Discord with her? Is Pinkie throwing a “We miss Twilight” party? Or has she moved on? Has Rarity’s business done well in Manehattan this year? Has she considered expanding again?

Who’s been running her country?

A pang of guilt shoots through her. She can only assume that Celestia and Luna have come out of retirement to cover her absence. Or perhaps it’s Cadance?

She wonders how much Flurry heart has grown. Is the little filly speaking properly yet? Does she miss her aunty?

Or has she forgotten? A year is a long time for a small filly.

Twilight sniffles, her eyes wet. She wants to give Flurry a hug. The poor dear probably doesn’t understand.

None of them probably understand. She just disappeared one day.

Twilight curses herself. She’d been such an idiot. All she had to do was tell somepony where she planned on being. Instead, she’d figured to be in and out in a few hours. A simple trip across the barrier to check on an odd magical fluctuation in the journals and a brief visit with Sunset. She’d brought Spike with her. He'd been eager to join her.

A sad smile worms its way across her face. Spike always likes visiting the human realm because of how much he’s doted on as a puppy.

The thought gives her pause. Is he still a puppy? Dogs grow quickly. Has Spike grown like a dog in the human world, or a dragon in Equestria? Her stomach turns. If anybody needs to go back, it’s him. It’s one thing to be a dog for a few days, but if he’s been a dog for a year…

She shivers, feeling guilty. Her heart aches as she traces her finger along the picture of her back. It’s all she has left of them.

In that moment, she’d give anything just to reassure Spike. He probably misses her as much as she does him. They’ve never been apart for this long before. Hopefully Sunset and this realm’s Twilight are treating him well.

Her eyes are wet and heavy as she hangs her head. It hurts to look, but she has to. She has to remember them.

And they have to remember her.