She Makes Me Laugh

Luna knocked as gently as she dared at the door to Twilight’s study. It was a small mercy that, as a princess, Twilight got a whole wing to herself. Facing her daughter was hard enough. Facing all the rest of the Element Bearers would be impossible. They’d learn, in their own time, what was going on.

This made it quite a surprise when she found that Twilight was not the only pony in her bedroom. Her daughter sat at the foot of her bed, being lightly cuddled by a puffy pink pony.

“Miss Pie? I had not expected you to be here.”

“I’m here as the Official Royal Support Hug Specialist, Your Highness!” Pinkie beamed. “By request. Even though I just made the title up now. Speaking of which…” She pulled Twilight in for another hug, nuzzling her. “It’s a very important job. Lot of demand for an ORSHS right now.”

“I see, and… is it working?”

“Well, she’s not crying anymore!” Pinkie cringed. “Sorry.”

“Are you two going to sit around pretending I don’t exist, or are we going to get to it?” said Twilight finally, turning to face the other alicorn before freezing up.

Both stared at each other. Pinkie coughed.

“Twilight,” said Luna eventually.

“Luna…” Twilight paused again. “Sorry, I’m sure you want me to call you ‘mother’ or something or—”

“No. No, it's quite alright. It’s a title that I know I have to… earn,” Luna shifted from hoof to hoof. “I’m happy for the chance all the same. So let’s start with… questions! Yes? You’ve got a lot of questions, beyond the obvious. We can bond over questions.”

Twilight took a deep breath. She looked over to Pinkie, who gave a little wave of encouragement, then back to Luna, before opening her mouth and letting it all spill out.

“Who’s my father? Was he still alive when you became Nightmare Moon? Was my ascension something I’m genetically predisposed to because you’re an alicorn or is that something that merely gave me a talent for magic to begin with? Speaking of genetics, are there any preexisting conditions or allergies that you have that might be an issue for me? I know both Celestia and I are allergic to cauliflower, do you have that? Can I learn to dreamwalk? Would you teach me to enter a pony's dreams? Is there some sort of royal line of succession, and if so am I technically part of it? Speaking of which if Cadance is legally Celestia’s niece too doesn’t that make her and Shining Armor being married a little odd or—”

“Twilight,” Luna put a hoof on her shoulder, and Twilight finally stopped, blushing and looking down. “Perhaps one question at a time would be best?”

“Yes, right. One at a time,” Twilight nodded. “Um. It’s alright that Pinkie is here? She’s… She’s being a big help with all this.”

“Of course, my little star. I would have invited Celestia to join us but…”

“Yeah, um. No. Maybe we talk to her later? I’ve got a list of questions for her too. A lot of questions.”

“I imagine,” Luna looked around. It was amazing to her how easy a pony could bumble into an awkward situation. “Shall we head out then? You’re welcome to join us, Pinkie.”

“I’m here until Twilight’s paychecks don’t clear,” Pinkie Pie giggled. “What’s the plan, Lulu? Where we headed?”

“To visit Twilight’s father,” she looked at their shocked expressions. “That was the first question on your list, was it not?”

In the past, the Royal Court had been attended by a similarly Royal Fool: a professional entertainer and confidant for the princess. But there hadn't been a Royal Fool in ages, despite petitioners from the related Royal College. Really, there were a lot of royal and foolish things all around, all contributing now only to this: a deserted hallway in a well traveled wing of the castle, full of clownly portraits and artifacts most humorous.

The Corridor of Fools.

A place that, evidently, the mare next to her treated as some sort of earthly Elysium.

“I can’t believe it! I can’t believe it! The Corridor of Fools! I’ve been trying to break into here since the Grand Galloping Gala but there’s always guards here and the guards will be like ‘No Ms. Pie, you can’t enter here we’re afraid you’ll lick the portraits or destroy the multitudes of priceless artifacts inside’. Pssshhhhhhhhhhh!”, Pinkie whispered before she stuck out her tongue and blew a frustrated raspberry. In here, that was probably something close to a prayer.

“Like I’d lick the portraits!” Pinkie paused and glanced conspiratorially at Twilight. “Just between besties though, do the portraits do something when licked?”

Twilight thought for a moment. “I think the later ones are magically enchanted to taste like something important to the Fool in question but— Pinkie, no! Pinkie, get back here!”

Luna watched as her daughter struggled to pull away her companion away from a painting of Paddles the Infinitely Jestevious to give her a lecture on showing proper respect towards Fools Past, which then turned into a debate over whether or not silly behavior counted as being respectful given the professional involved, and finally a compromise where Pinkie could freely explore by royal Princess of Friendship decree, so long as that exploration did not involve one’s mouth.

She smiled to herself, wondering if anyone else had picked up on the clues between the two. The looks, the comfortable matching of wits, the blushes at accidental contact (at least on Twilight’s side). It wasn’t precisely the same, yet as a wise pony once said: history didn’t repeat, but it did rhyme.

As Pinkie explored a small section dedicated to those brave and selfless Battle Clowns that had given their lives in service to Princess and Country, Twilight finally moved to where Luna had been waiting, patiently.

“Pinkie Pie seems to be enjoying herself immensely,” smiled Luna.

“I’m uncertain if Pinkie is religious,” Twilight admitted, blushing slightly. “But if she is, this is effectively a temple for her.”

“I’m glad that she’s happy.”

“Yeah…”

Both of them sat there in silence. A somewhat distant “Oooooooooh!!!!!” from a somewhat distant Pinkie Pie highlighted their own lack of conversation, before Luna finally coughed.

“You… wished to know your father, I believe this would be a suitable introduction,” she motioned to one of the very last portraits in the gallery, all the way at the beginning. Twilight followed her hoof to gaze up at the large painting.

Twilight had never given the Corridor of Fools much thought. After all, the position of Royal Fool had been retired long ago, and most of them to begin with hadn’t been unicorns, their various contributions to the world of comedy something she had found to be one of those rare things that she had little interest in. Still, she supposed if she had bothered to look through the gallery of past clowns now passed, the subject of the painting would have looked all too familiar.

The earth pony on the canvas before her had a lavender blue coat. He didn’t look very strapping or tall, but his face was youthful and handsome, and the painter had given his eyes a sparkle that implied a mischievous wisdom far beyond his years. Eyes that were the exact same color as hers.

The dates below the portrait didn’t span a very long timespan.

“This is…” Twilight swallowed down her nerves. This was harder than she thought. “That’s him?”

“It is an uncanny likeness,” Luna confirmed. “I was there when it was painted. He claimed that he had received ancient mime training that let him sit still for extended periods of time.”

“Mime training?”

“He was sincere about that,” Luna sighed wistfully. “The most sincere Fool I’ve ever known. Though I am unsure if the mime training was ancient, or if the mimes that trained him were, themselves, ancient.”

“Huh.”

“Mmmhmm.”

More awkward silence. At this point Twilight heavily suspected it was genetic. There was a distant crash and a whispered “Whoops, sorry…” from down the corridor.

“Pinkie, over here!” shouted Twilight.

“Coming!” The pink pony down the hall beamed, moving away from the collapsed suit of advanced jesterial armor, and trotting down the aisles with her eyes closed, singing all the while.

“I finally got to go to the Corridor of Fools and there’s no guards to kick me out because we’re going to meet Luna’s foalpapa~”

“Pinkie, a little respect?”

“Believe me,” Luna flashed a small smile. “He’d have loved the irreverence.”

“Sounds like my kinda pony. Nice to meet you Daddy Spark—” Pinkie opened her eyes, which immediately bulged out of her sockets as she gazed up at the painting.

“Puh—Peri…” She looked over to Twilight, then over to Luna, then back over to Twilight, then back up at the painting.

“Peritwinkle? The Peritwinkle? You’re Peritwinkle’s daughter?”

“I am?” Twilight looked to Luna, who nodded enthusiastically. “I am, apparently.”

“Twilight’s dad is Peritwinkle! Your dad is Peritwinkle! I’m best friends with Peritwinkle’s daughter!” Pinkie began to bounce around the room, giggling with mad glee.

“I’m sorry Pinkie, but I'm not really read up on, uh… Clown stuff? I take it he was important?”

Pinkie stopped mid bounce, rotating in midair before falling in front of Twilight and grabbing her face with her forelegs, pulling her close.

“Twilight, he wasn’t just important. He’s not just a clown. He’s The Clown. His comedic theories are the backbone of all modern prop comedy and established pranking. He set and put forth more standards than even the great Happyface Custardpants.”

Twilight tried not to blush at the thought that Pinkie’s face was this close to hers. And here she thought she had gotten used to Pinkie’s tendency to be a personal space invader. Pinkie just took her blank stare for something else and sighed.

“Twily…” She said carefully. “Peritwinkle is to parties and fools what Prancing Bacon is to empirical scientific study.”

“Oh. Oh. OH,” Twilight blinked, a mix of awe and shock coming on as she finally looked back over to Luna. “R-really?”

Luna shrugged, a sad smile on her face, evidently recalling distant memories. “He was quite the prolific writer. Celestia published his manuscripts,” the smile became a frown. “Posthumously.”

Three ponies sat in a hall of dead clowns, reflecting on what that actually meant. Especially for the Princess of the Night.

“Luna— Um, I mean,” Twilight hesitated. She still wasn’t sure if she was ready to break out the ‘M’ word. Frankly everything still felt surreal. “I don’t know how recent all this is for you, if it’s hard to talk about it we can—”

“No,” Luna sat up, moving closer to Twilight and wrapping a wing around her daughter. “His loss hurts but… it will always hurt. I would not deprive my daughter of her father.”

The princess took a deep breath, steadying herself. Pinkie Pie, rapt with anticipation, scooched in closer and brought out a bucket of popcorn from some unknown space.

“It all began when he threw two pies in my face.”

“Aww!” Cooed Pinkie. “How romantic!”