Take Me Home

Applejack sat back on the train looking down at her satchel with some stuff she needed on the train, but the most important things were not the necessities. She pulled out the letter that started a long journey in her life. The first letter she'd gotten from Rarity after Twilight's coronation. When the six of them kind of started to drift. It was not so simple as they weren't friends anymore, because they still were. It was that they didn't have a unified schedule any longer. They didn't make their plans around seeing each other. Rainbow Dash devoted most of her time to the Wonderbolts, Fluttershy to her animals, Twilight to ruling and Rarity to her career. She, of course, devoted most of her time to the farm. Pinkie was still around constantly, but that was about it. Though Applejack smiled down at the letter in her hooves.

It marked an earlier time in her life, a more hopeful time. Not that she wasn't still hopeful, she was, but it had been tempered by life and its compromises. She mused faintly how one different decision might have changed her life. If she had answered this letter differently. If she had put her hoof down and told Rarity that she needed to come back to Ponyville instead, how might things be different now? But of course she hadn't, she couldn't have done that. It wasn't her place to tell Rarity what was best for her. That was up to Rarity alone.

Dear Applejack,

Please come to Bostail for the spring time! I have friends up here and all but it would be so lovely to see you. I know you have to work at the farm but couldn't you take a season off? I know you can't (but I can always hope...) I do miss seeing you and the others so, but you especially. My friends are introducing me to some very important people up here that will help me open up another boutique, and get me in with some very important ponies so I'm afraid I can't tear myself away at the moment. It's quite the boon to my career darling! I could take the entire coast by storm with a few connections and a few shows!

I really hope you don't hold it against me. I know you sprung that... Surprise on me right before I left so this is kind of your own fault! (I jest darling, I promise.) But I do really hope you won't be upset that I need to stay away longer than I had planned after you confessed your feelings. And I've not changed my answer at all! I do feel the same, but this is a major step in my future. Give me a few months, six at the outside and I'll be able to come home for a good long time! I do home that works for you but if not... Well, I'll understand of course, though be sad.

With love,
Rarity.

Applejack sighed as she put the letter down, and looked out the window, shaking her head. Again thinking on what might have been different if this trip was taking place after only that first letter. If she had gone to speak to Rarity in person. Not a letter encouraging Rarity to pursue her career, that they had plenty of time ahead of them. But she had sent that letter. The letter assuring Rarity that they could wait, they could do the long distance thing for a little then regroup in a while. They were long fast friends so it wouldn't be hard. For a moment longer she stared out the window, wishing that this was the past, a train to Bostail to go talk to Rarity, a true heart to heart. Whether it ended up with them on the same page, with Rarity coming home, or with them agreeing to part ways, romantically at least, it would have been for the better.

She bonked her head against the glass, letting out another, longer sigh as she accepted that this was not a train to Bostail. No, she was not so fortunate, or wise. She waited, and Rarity's next letter had been so much worse. A call for help, though it took Applejack a while, she didn't realize that at first. It was not just another letter of changing plans, but one of a changing life. Changing priorities, and a changing mind from what Applejack had expected from her fashionable friend.

Dear Applejack,

I am sorry darling! I read your letter, I promise. I've just been so busy up here! I've thrown myself into my work and had almost no spare time. But I have found a solution to that, and I think you've already found out! I have a new assistant, Brilliant Lotus. She's perfect! She has me meeting all kinds of new people! And I have been getting dress orders nearly constantly! It's so much to keep up with, but it's so good for business. As you probably figured out! Brilliant Lotus mentioned that whenever her previous employer, Photo Finish, had to break promises to his wife he'd send her a gift. (Photo Finish, can you believe it?)

Now, I know I promised that it'd only be about six months and it's been seven. But I must beg your patience, Brilliant Lotus has organized a massive gala. You're, of course, invited. I'd love to have you there! You can meet so many important ponies! But even if you can't I just need a little more time! Only a few months this time, I've already set up three boutiques here on the coast (in different cities, of course.) The gala's in Los Pegasus, and if you wanted to come I would make sure to make time for you! I'm almost buried in work but you're important Applejack. You really must visit! People keep asking to meet my marefriend and they'll start getting suspicious if they don't see you!

Love,
Rarity.

Applejack rolled her eyes as she finished the letter. The "gift" had been a tractor. A freaking tractor! Not that they couldn't use it but spending that much money on an apology without even checking with the recipient was ridiculous. Though it had certainly told Applejack just how good the coast was being to Rarity. Applejack's shoulders slumped as she remembered her own justification. If she had been able to go off for a year and just buy her friend a tractor she'd have been mighty tempted to do so. So she had simply nodded, a little cross at Rarity for the radio silence but forgave her (after checking with Twilight after the first month to make sure Rarity was physically alright.) Tossing the letter back into her pack Applejack stared at the mountains, nowhere near Los Pegasus. Not on the way to a gala to spend time with her supposed marefriend, no, that would be too simple. To be able to go back and attend that gala, to have time to spend with Rarity. To let her know how much she, not her money meant would have been the best choice.

But she hadn't made that choice, she had simply written back that, while annoyed, she understood. She excused Rarity's poor behavior because of her feelings. Telling Rarity how she had been feeling taken for granted. She hoped that Rarity would read the letter and come to her senses, and reach out again. Applejack reached for the next letter.

Dear Applejack,

Oh darling I am sorry for not being more considerate to your feelings. That is truly a valid criticism of my recent actions. Though at least this time I did warn you I'd be busy and not able to write as many letters as you. Not that I'm complaining! Your letters are truly lovely, and a bright spot in my busy schedule whenever I get one! I will make sure to tell Brilliant Lotus to put aside some time so I can properly respond to your letters! I hope you liked what I sent you most recently. That is painted by THE Blue Brush, it was an honor for him to paint me, and the first pony I thought should have it was you, darling! I know I'm far away, but the painting isn't!

I've set down for a bit in Gallopado, I'm afraid that Brilliant Lotus just got me set up on making a bunch of designs for Photo Finshes' next fashion show! It's amazing! If you want to come visit I'd be happy to entertain you! I can even have Brilliant Lotus arrange your tickets for you! At my expense, of course. If you visit do please give me a little notice though, Brilliant Lotus will need to rearrange my schedule so we can have some truly quality couple time. I hope you can find time to come.

Love,
Rarity.

P.S. Give my love to the girls, I haven't had time to write them much either.

Applejack blew out her breath, ruffling the letter in her hooves before she put it aside. Rarity was still being rather selfish. She didn't see it, she had seen how the new people she was hanging around with did things, and was repeating it. Broken promises papered over by gifts. The little things dismissed as there was "important" things going on. Applejack had seen right through it, and hated it. She also hated seeing her friend change.

Applejack considered this to be the point of no return. Not, this moment, of course. She wasn't lucky enough for that moment to be this moment. That she had gotten off her keister and gotten on that train to Gallopado. Talked to Rarity, told her why the gifts weren't meaningful. A gift was great, but it wasn't a replacement for a marefriend. It wasn't just something she could be sent and then ignored like an upset customer. That's what she had started to feel like, a customer. A transactional recipient, like some kind of marriage of convenience. Someone who received things from Rarity, her payment was her time, waiting for Rarity to come back. And she had lashed out. She could say now that lashing out was not the best choice, but she had been angry, she had been emotional, she was losing her friend and her supposed love. She had sent such an angry letter, putting her hoof down one way, or the other. Applejack reached to pick up the next letter.

Dear Applejack,

I must take issue with your most recent letter darling! Really, I am out here working my butt off and you can't even take the time to write a kind letter! I have had Brilliant Lotus send you multiple gifts, and you barely thanked me for the last one before talking about yourself, and your needs. I do believe that sending you things for your farm is seeing to your needs. I'd be happy to pay for farmhands if you prefer! You needn't do anything and you can just come and live with me up here in Coltston! There's even some farms around here you could work on if you yearn for physical labor so much!

I must say this blaming me is quite unseemly. I was not the one who sprung this on the other right before she left on an important business trip! It's quite draining darling, even more than just my job. All this extra stress is making me very tired. Also I must say that I take issue with your implications about how much I mention Brilliant Lotus she is simply the most excellent personal assistant I've ever had, nothing more! The mere implication I would betray you so just means that YOU don't trust ME. I have included a first class ticket to Coltston. You should come up so we can talk this out in person dear, I'm sure that if we can sit down we'll be able to work this all out.

From,
Rarity.

Applejack tossed the letter back into her pack. That was the hardest letter for her to read. It was the moment that she felt like the truly lost her old friend and found someone else in her place. Applejack was a simple straight forward pony but even she could see the twisted logic, and possibly downright manipulation that Rarity had been trying to pull there. It wasn't ok, no matter what stress she had been under. Though, a part of Applejack had to defend Rarity, she had heard through Pinkie Pie that she had to cancel two shows she was a part of because she was so overworked. That didn't excuse anything, of course, but it did earn a modicum of sympathy, despite the bad behavior.

Applejack had made her final decision a week after receiving the letter. She was not going to get on a train to Coltston, she was not going to talk to Rarity. If Rarity thought of her as a burden she would relieve Rarity of that burden. She would allow Rarity to make whatever connections and new relationships she wanted. At that point Applejack was so fed up she no longer cared if Rarity even answered her letter. Looking back on it that was a bit too far, even for the situation. But her personal feelings were personal feelings, you couldn't control how you felt, and she had felt hurt on so many levels. Applejack reached to her pack for the next letter.

Dear Miss Jack,

Very well Applejack. I agree. We are no longer a couple! Not that you can say that we ever really were. You chose the worst time to confess your feelings to me, right before my big business trip! If I didn't know better I would have guessed you were purposely timing it to sabotage me! Though as much as I am upset with you now I'm confident that you wouldn't have done that on purpose. So it simply was such a poor planning that you nearly ruined my career on accident than actually ruining it through malice.

While you may not be so thoughtful I want to show you I hold no malice. I've had Brilliant Lotus include two first class round trip tickets to anywhere except the city of Maneport, you obviously have no interest in seeing me. You can go by yourself, take one of your precious family members, or maybe a brand new marefriend. Since you seem so needy I bet you already have a new one. I hope whoever it is is close by and give you all the constant attention you demand from your marefriends. Don't worry, I won't warn her how clingy you are. Maybe she will make you happy where I didn't. Well, no hard feelings, darling. I certainly have a bright future ahead of me! Now without this stress I'll be able to double the amount of shows I do!

Farewell,
Rarity.

Written by Brilliant Lotus, dictated, not read.

Applejack cringed at the letter, it was the worst one. Not the hardest one on a personal level, just the worst on a vitriol level. It was a hurt pony hurting ponies, it was something that was all too common in the world. She had been a little mean in her own letter, though being as fair as she could she would say it wasn't anywhere near that vitriolic. It had started a long time of silence between the two of them. And while unfortunate, that was fine by her. Applejack knew that not all things were meant to come to pass. She had moved on, Rarity had moved on. Applejack had been through a few marefriends. And while none kindled quite the same spark that Rarity had all that time ago, she was quite happy now. They were engaged, and they had already organized the ceremony for the coming spring.

Though that wasn't the last letter, that wasn't the reason she was on this train. There was another letter waiting for her to go over, it was the only one that wasn't, at least in part, from Rarity. At least, that's what the letter said. And she believed it. That cursed new mare in Rarity's life, Brilliant Lotus. The creature that was always there in the background of every one of Rarity's letters. Likely a large contributor to this new life of Rarity's. Applejack sighed and reached down to her pack, fishing out the next letter in the pack.

To Applejack

Rarity would like to apologize for being unable to return to Ponyville for the harvest of the zap apples as originally planned. We have just moved into Neighvana and are making many connections. Though not often thought of as fashionable, even the worlds leading doctors need to have their needs looked after. And they are very good customers, truly valuing Rarity's talents for all they are.

She would also like to ask none of you to visit her, she is very busy and sadly cannot spare the time. She is constantly in the highest demand for personal consolations, designs, and fittings. She knows this will disappoint any of you that bothered to come visit but it's for the best. She isn't in a state where she could properly entertain, and would simply not be fit for a visit. She is spending most her time looking after the doctors and their needs, after all.

She knows this will come as a disappointment, after all, and has instructed me to send along a generous donation of bits to the town and it's facilities. So that while you aren't going to be together you can all celebrate her success with her, even though you are apart. If you have an desire for new dresses she offers you any thing from her catalogs free of charge. I've included all the current catalogs in case you don't have access to them. She also wished me to tell you "kisses."

Professionally yours,
Brilliant Lotus

Applejack scowled at the letter, unable to prevent herself from having bad thoughts towards this mare she'd never met. But she quickly let go of the anger, it wasn't the assistants fault that Rarity had made those choices. Applejack looked up, at the empty cabin, alone with her thoughts and her memories. Many memories of a pretty young unicorn panicking over some dirty. Of an old friend helping her out, despite it getting her "all gross." Of that young unicorn growing up a bit, finding her hooves and growing into her own. The beautiful lady that Applejack had developed feeling for. But every memory had a tiny, almost imperceptible bitter aftertaste, poisoned oh so slightly but what had happened between them. It didn't make her dislike the memories, but it did make her melancholy whenever she thought of them. They could be so perfect, but now, now they weren't, and she had to live with that.

Their past wasn't the only source of the melancholy that now hung around her. Ironic that now, when she was finally going to see Rarity. Much to her own surprise, she hadn't expected to ever end up on a train to see Rarity after their break up. But when she had gotten the most recent letter she hadn't had much of a choice. She reached down, and with a trembling hoof pulled out the most recent letter. One that had changed so much, so much for a pony she hadn't spoken to in years.

Dear Applejack,

In concordance with the wishes of Rarity you are receiving this letter because her condition has taken a turn for the worse. While for the public her tiredness was downplayed as stress and her being exclusive Rarity has been sick for a long time now. She didn't wish to burden her friends with her condition that was discovered a few years ago. So she's been undergoing treatments privately with only a few knowing of her condition.

As per her request she asked me to send out a letter informing all her old friends of her current status, and asks you with all haste to come to Hooflywood with all haste so that she can see you before she passes. Tickets have been included with this letter so that you may make the journey no matter what your current situation. She hopes that any issues she has had with you in the past can be set aside in the wake of this new news.

From,
Brilliant Lotus

P.S. Darling, this is Rarity. I want to say how sorry I am that I've not been in contact these years. I was so caught up in the glitz and glam, but there is no excuse for my behavior. I can only hope that you forgive me for everything. And for not warning you about this ahead of time. I just couldn't face what I'd done to my life. I'll never be able to make up for my selfishness. I am sorry.

Applejack looked around as she got off the train. Seeing a pony that had been described to her a few times, Brilliant Lotus, Rarity's personal assistant. Applejack walked over and nodded to her. "How do. You're mighty loyal to come meet all of Rarity's friends."

Brilliant Lotus bowed her head slightly. "No, not all. Only you." Applejack blinked in confusion but Brilliant Lotus continued. "I think that this letter will explain the situation." Brilliant Lotus gave a letter to Applejack. "And these," she pulled out a large envelop, obviously full of papers. "Will be all you need, if you agree to the letter, of course. If not, I will do my last job as Rarity's personal assistant.

Applejack hesitated for more than a moment. What in the world could the letter be, did Rarity change her mind? Did she remember their fight so bitterly that she didn't want to meet anymore? Applejack steeled her resolve, she would read the last letter, either way. And from how Brilliant Lotus was talking it sounded more like a personal request, than a rejection anyway.

Applejack looked over the letter. Having to stop a few times, tears welling in her eyes as she faltered after only the first sentence. Then, finally, when she finished the short letter, she gave a single nod. With a single nod and a single tear she dismissed Brilliant Lotus, the tear reflected in Brilliant Lotus' own eye. Applejack turned, taking Rarity's last task, for herself. As an old friend.

Dear Applejack,

I'm sorry that I've deceived you again, one last time. You're here and I'm already gone. Brilliant Lotus has made all the arrangements, taken care of all the paperwork, you don't need to worry about any of that. I just couldn't face you, or any of you. I couldn't look you all in the eyes and see the life that I burned behind me in pursuit of success. I wasn't strong enough and I am a coward. I am so sorry, Applejack.

I know this doesn't change anything, but if I could go back I would do so much differently. We would have been together, not apart. I would have put you, my friends, and my family above my work. Money is nice, but it never brought me joy like you and the girls. I couldn't see through all the bright lights of the parties, until I couldn't go to the parties any more. Then, it was too late, I was already lost.

My last request for you is to bring me home. None of the cities I've been to have been home, none have felt like it. I want you to take me back to Ponyville, even if I can't be there any more in life, I can be there in spirit. My last request is to take me home, to my friends and family. The place I never should have left.

Please, Applejack. Take me home.

With all my love, from here, and into eternity,
Rarity.