Why Equestria can't be conquered
Prologue: War is declared and the invasion is on
Load Full StoryNext ChapterEmperor Zaku sat in the war room with with his top generals looking over the secret intelligence his spies, who were posing as goodwill ambassadors and tourists, had gathered on Equestria. The nation comprised almost entirely of the equine cousins was a bounteous land, ripe with fertile lands perfect for growing bumper crops of wheat, barley, oats, corn, and fruits of all kind, and strangely enough, minerals that grew like trees and shrubs from the ground. Its gem mines never seemed to run out, despite centuries of near-constant digging. The forests there grew mighty trees that always seemed to completely replenish within a couple of years of heavy logging. Its beautiful mares there outnumbered the stallions five-to-one, as opposed to Zebrica, where it was nearly an equal split between the sexes.
And best of all, Equestria, in all of its long and storied history, never had a standing military. The closest it had to a military was small units, no more than a few dozen individuals each, that served in ceremonial, exhibitionist, and sometimes law enforcement roles. Despite that, Equestria, in its long five thousand year history, had never been successfully invaded, though several of its neighbors had each tried. Griffonia, Saddle Arabia, The United Deer Holts, Neighpon, The Storm Isles, and Yakyakistan...all had tried, and all had failed. What was left of their armies, greatly depleted, had limped home in disgrace, and not long after, their countries fell into sharp decline.
This disturbed Emperor Zaku. He stroked his fingers through his long and curly black and white striped beard. He had read the surviving historical accounts of these nations. They spoke of entire armies vanishing, the few survivors, their minds broken with dread and trauma, babbled incoherently about horrible tides of flesh that would wash over the armies, dragging them away. Zaku flipped through the various intelligence reports, there was no mention of Equestria having anything that even vaguely resembled massive military bases, nor was their any reports of the hiring of mercenary armies. There were a few of the pony-kin being very randy.
A few weeks ago Zaku had sent envoys to the various city-states of Equestria carrying Zebrica's intent to invade, and demands for them to declare themselves neutral. In return for their neutrality, Zebrica promised that their city-states would be preserved, if they refused, then the Zebrican forces would raze them to the ground, put their citizens to the sword, and drag off the survivors into slavery.
Zaku immediately perked up at the announcement of a group of envoys that had returned. The emperor of Zebrica quickly ordered them into his throne room. He was shocked by their appearance and number, it was only two stallions, they had been stripped of their armor and their clothes hung in tatters from their bodies. Their fur, manes and tails were matted and messy. There were bruises visible through their fur. Most shockingly, the two stallions, which were both members of the elite force, The Tall Grass Runners, which had served as bodyguards for the envoys, both had a haunted and traumatized thousand yard stares in their eyes. They also appeared...dehydrated. One was holding a rolled up scroll tightly in his clenched left hand.
Emperor Zaku gestured for a page to retrieve the scroll from the zebra who was clenching it tightly. When the page reached for the scroll, the elite zebra warrior flinched away, almost as if the page had just thrust a live snake at him. After a few tries, the page managed to retrieve the scroll from the elite zebra warrior and brought it to the Emperor of Zebrica.
The page unrolled the scroll and began to read aloud.
Dearest Zaku, might emperor of the equally mighty Zebrica,
Zaku quirked up the corner of his mouth in a half-smile. Celestia was well known for her flowery and flattering language.
We, the most high, supreme, and royal princess of Equestria, are aware and have been aware for quite some time of your intentions to make war against our great nation and Our Little Ponies. We have also been aware of your spies disguised as goodwill ambassadors and tourists, and have been tracking them for quite a long while.
We, the most high, supreme, and royal princess of Equestria urge you to rethink your desire to make war against us and Our Little Ponies. As you know, Equestria has no need or desire for a standing military. That however, does not mean we are defenseless. If you would simply send envoys to our neighbors and ask why invading Equestria is a doomed endeavor.
We have no wish to harm your zebras, or any other creature, and thus we URGENTLY implore you to seek a peaceful resolution to this endeavor.
The most high, supreme, and royal princesses of Equestria, Celestia Golden Rays, Luna Silver Light, Twilight Velvet Sparkle LXXXVI, and Mi Amore "Cadance" Cadenza
Zaku clenched his fists and sneered.
P.S. The envoys you sent to our city-states have all been arrested, charged and tried for the most-high crime in our nation, threatening harmony and friendship. They will be detained and punished until Our Little Ponies have received full satisfaction. We chose to release the two of your envoy's bodyguards, after several days of punishment, to return and give you this message.
Zaku gestured to the two elite zebra warriors. "What did those ponies do to you two?"
The first elite warrior simply curled up in a ball on the floor, hugging his knees, rocking back and forth, and humming a formless tune. The second warrior dropped to his knees and began bawling like a newborn foal. "It was horrible, you most high majesty! We thought things were going as normal when Zattan handed Princess Celestia the demands for Equestria's complete and total surrender. She simply said, 'I see.', then ejected us from the palace. As we walked towards the train station, there was suddenly this strange glow then enveloped the city, and suddenly every mare started looking at us like a pride of lions looks at a wounded gazelle. We decided to make double-quick time to the train station. That's when we were met by a mare wearing a powdered judge's wig and nothing else. She as flanked by dozens of naked mares! They were openly masturbating! The held up a long scroll, leveled a finger at us, and shouted in a loud voice that we were guilty of violating harmony and friendship, and said that our punishment was forced servitude! Then the whole city just erupted! Dozens, hundreds, maybe thousands of mares sprung on us from every angle! Hands gripping and tearing at our armor and clothes! Mouths nipping, biting, and licking our bodies! Groins and asses thrusting at our crotches, mouths, hands, and anywhere else the could fit them! Zardoz tried to run for the train, but only made it a couple of meters before he disappeared in a tidal wave of bodies! They force fed us apple mush and poured potions down our throats! They violated us in ways we never thought mares could! I won't go back!"
Zaku rose from the throne, his face a mask of anger, disgust, and rage. He raised his fist over his head and shouted, "Vile savages! Brutal barbarians! They brutally enslave, punish, and torture envoys that are protected under treaty! It's war! We will erase Equestria off the face of Quadrupedia! We will avenge our comrades and every nation they have brought to the brink of near-destruction!" He quickly gestured his hands to the court. "Send forth this message to all of my generals: No quarter is to be given! Burn their fields! Collapse their mines! At every city, village, and town, put every pony of military age to the sword and drag all their foals away in bondage! Equestria has just signed its death warrant!"
Zaku sat in the war room, surrounded by his generals. The war had officially been on for just a couple of weeks and the reports pouring in weren't good. Every squad of pathfinders that had been sent in to mark out paths of ingress for Zebrica's armies had all disappeared. The few lone scouts that specialized in concealed observment had reported back that there were bands of mares, from the various border villages and hamlets, roving the countryside, and had ambushed and dragged off every one of the pathfinder squads.
Zaku slammed his fists onto the war room table in anger and frustration. He quickly issued new orders. The pathfinders would be rolled into the various armies, and instead it would fall to the lone scouts to mark out routes of ingress.
Zarata quickly gobbled down his meager meal consisting of a hard, bland, cracker-like biscuit, made of ground savannah grass flour and shortening, that was compressed and baked into something that was easily carried. He quickly took a mouthful of water from his canteen, the hard, bland, cracker-like biscuit soaked up the water until it was mushy. After chewing up and swallowing the now mushy cracker-like biscuit, he took another mouthful of water to wash the taste out of his mouth. He then shoved a handful of dried dates in his mouth.
After finishing his meager meal, Zatara brushed the crumbs from his scout armor, which was made from three layers of iron grass woven together. Picking up the spear from where he had propped it on a nearby tree, pulled his dark green cloak about his body and set about continuing his job, marking out the narrow trail through the forest so the army just on the other side of the border could easily find and follow it. Pulling the hatchet from his knapsack, he chopped limbs from trees, fashioned them into stakes, and drove them into the ground. After driving a few stakes, he pulled a small pouch red of paint and a brush from his knapsack, and started painting the tops of the stakes. He also painted a few red X's on several of the trees.
Zatara knelt down on the edge of the trail, laid his spear on the ground, and pulled a folded piece of paper and a small pencil from under his cloak. He unfolded the paper, revealing a hand-drawn map, and began drawing out more of the map.
*snap*
Zatara quickly sprung to his hooves, spear in hand, and spun around. Standing a few steps from him was a lanky, yet muscular earth pony mare. She was wearing a pair of denim short-short cut-offs that left very little to the imagination. She also wore a very short-cut flannel shirt that equally left very little to the imagination. He had only been in the Zebrican army for a few months and had passed scouting school with flying colors. He had seen the films that said that Equestrian mares were very dangerous and bloodthirsty. This mare definitely had a thirsty look in her eyes, but he wasn't sure if it was for blood.
Zatara aggressively waved his spear. "Stay back!"
The earth pony mare ran her hand up her hips, her sides, and up to her chest. "There's no reason to be 'fraid of l'il ol' me." She unbuttoned the buttons on her short-cut flannel shirt, revealing, but not fully exposing her breasts. "Ya like what ya see?" Slightly slouching her shoulders, she shed the short-cut, leaving very little to the imagination flannel shirt, now leaving nothing at all to the imagination.
Zatara's eyes instinctively went to the mares fully bare breasts. Clearing his throat and forcing his eyes away from her naked breasts and back up to her eyes. He made a few thrusts with his spear. "I said stay back! I don't want to have to run you through!"
The mare giggled as she lowered her hands to the waistband of her denim, shortie-short daisy dukes. She unsnapped the button and pulled down the zipper. With a giggle and a couple of lewd thrusts of her groin, she pulled the two denim flaps aside, revealing her pubic mound. "Oh, but Ah do think ya wanna run me through. Or should Ah say, run through me?" She slipper her thumbs into the waistband of her unbuttoned and unsnapped denim shortie-short daisy dukes and wiggled her hips as she pulled them down.
Zatara was unsure what game this mare was playing. He was sure it was one that would use sexual enticement to lure him into a sense of ease, then stab him with a knife and drink his blood. At least that's what Propaganda Film Alpha-Two-Two-Niner-Omega said. Keeping the point of the spear pointed at the now fully naked mare, he backed away slowly. Suddenly there was a large shadow that loomed over him. Stopping dead in his tracks, he looked over his shoulder, he saw an absolute mountain of a mare. "Holy shi--GACK!" A pair of thick, muscular arms wrapped around his neck, cutting off the blood flow to his brain. He tried to shout for help, but only a strangled croak escaped his throat. For several seconds he kicked and flailed and clawed and scratched in a vain attempt to escape the chokehold. Darkness.
Consciousness returned to Zatara. In confusion he stared at something...he wasn't sure what it was. It suddenly dawned on him, he was looking at a broad, muscular back, a broad, round, and muscular ass, and a pair of broad, muscular thighs. He realized that he was being carried like a sack of potatoes.
"Ah think he's awake."
Zatara turned his head in the direction of the voice and saw the skinny, yet muscular earth pony mare that he had encountered an undetermined amount earlier. He got a few seconds to observe her in the dappled light of the forest, red fur with a green mane and tail. The marks on her hip he could see was of a large apple with a single bite taken out of it. He suddenly found himself unceremoniously dumped on the ground. As he sucked air back into his lungs, he stared up the the mountain of a mare. her fur was pink, and she had a green, white and pink-striped mane and tail. On her hips were marks depicting clusters of small pink apples. She reached for his groin with what could only accurately be described as a massive paw.
"What're ya doin', Fuji?", the skinny mare asked.
Fuji replied, "Gonna rip his pants off so Ah can see if it's true what Sparkle Press says, that all zebra stallions have cocks that slap their knees, nuts that are as big as grapefruits, and can shoot gallons of jizz so potent that every mare who fucks one will get knocked up. Then Ah'm gonna fuck the everloving shit outta him until he paints my cooter and baby cave with his nut milk."
The skinny mare stepped forward and tried to push Fuji aside. "No fair! Ah was the one who snuck on him and kept him distracted so ya could knock him out. So Ah get first go at him!"
Fuji roughly shoved the skinny mare away. "Nuh-uh, Red! Ah knocked him out, Ah carried him almost all the way home! So Ah get first plow!" She violently ripped Zarara's pants off. "Huh! Not very impressive." She poked a broad finger at his nethers. "Wassa matter? Ya don't like mares? Lemme see that there knee-knocker."
Red shouldered Fuji aside. "Ya ain't gonna get no stallion up by pokin' away at his junk with those there apple mushers. Let a real mare show ya how to do it." Red gently cradle the zebra's balls with one hand as she gently stroked at his sheath. "C'mon. Show l'il ol' Red Delicious what ya got hidin' there fer me. Ah promise Ah'll be nice'n gentle. Ya don't need ta worry none 'bout that there big'n mean Fuji."
Zatara did everything he could to avoid arousal. He repeated the Zebrican Flag Oath over and over in his head. He sang the Zebrican national anthem in his head. He imagined cold showers and his grandmother naked. It was all for not as his body's automatic reactions betrayed him.
"That's a very nice cock." Red Delicious licked her lips as she stroked the length of pulsing, hardening stallionhood. Gripping the length of jet black meat in her hand, she stood up and prepared to line up her nether lips with its blunt head.
Zatara took in a deep breath and swallowed hard as he centered his thoughts. He quickly snapped his hoof upwards, colliding with Red's groin. Her eyes went crossed as her knees almost immediately snapped together and a painted groan escaped her lips. As she doubled over, he kicked upwards, connecting with her face, sending her reeling backwards onto the ground.
Without a second to spare, Zatara sprung to his hooves and ran as fast as they could carry him. Heavy hoof-falls thundered behind him. Without bothering to look behind him, he plowed forward through the underbrush, occasionally wincing in pain as small branches collided with his exposed nethers. He zigged and zagged, pressed through briar patches, and leapt over fallen logs, but to no avail, the massive mare thundered through the undergrowth after him completely undeterred.
Through a gap in the trees Zatara saw the trail he had been marking and mapping out. He made a mad dash for it. A figure sprung out from the undergrowth to his left and he immediately cut to his right to avoid it, still heading to the trail. Another figure sprung from the undergrowth, this time to his right, forcing him to cut to the left. A length of twine close to the ground snagged on his hoof. In the corner of his vision he saw a log descend from the trees attached to a length of rope. Before he could react, a loop of rope tightened around his hoof.
"Whoop!" Zatara found himself hanging upside down by his hoof. He kicked and flailed, trying to get free. A heavyset mare, with a greenish-tan coat, and a main and tail of wispy white hair, wearing nothing but a thin night gown, came walking up.
"Hah-ha! Lookie here! Lookie here at what we done caught!"
An older, also heavyset, stallion walked up. "Looks like we done caught a good breeder fer our gals, Crabby Apple. Cider! Sauce! Y'all done did good."
Two other younger mares walked up, eyed the dangling zebra like wolves eyes up a lamb that got stranded from its herd.
Fuji thundered up with Red close on her heels. "No fair!", Fuji shouted. "Me'n Red had'em caught."
Crabby rounded on Red and Fuji. "So why was he runnin' through the underbrush like an a'feared jackrabbit?"
Red Delicious turned her head to the side and gave an embarrassed murmer.
Crabby put a hand to her ear. "Ah'm an ol' mare, so mah hearin' ain't what it used to be. Would ya mind speakin' up so's Ah can hear ya right proper."
Red cleared her throat and gave an embarrassed cough. "Ah said he kicked me in the cooter and then the eye." She gestured to her swollen eye that was starting to bruise.
Crabby clicked her tongue and shook her head. "Serves ya right fer not stickin' to the plan. Ah bet you an' Fuji were gonna try'n steal a couple'a plows 'fore yer sisters got there. That's what bein' greedy gets ya." She looked Red over. "You done went and got yo'self a right proper shiner. Apple Root, what do ya think? Cause Ah think that b'cause of Red and Fuji bein' all greedy, y'all done went and lost yer first to rounds with our new breedin' slave."
Apple Root gave a curt nod. "That sound fair, darlin'."
Fuji and Red stamped a hoof, snorted, and threw up their arms.
Apple Root shook a finger at the two mares. "Now don't you be givin' me and yer ma no hisy fits, or y'all can go carve yo'selves a couple's wooden peckers and get yer pokin' in fer the whole month."
Fuji and Red hung their heads and said at the same time, "Sorry, ma. Sorry, pa."
"Please, just let me go!" Zatara felt real fear run through his body. "I promise you'll never see me again."
Crabby Apple walked over to the zebra and gave him a sharp kick to the stomach. "Shut up! Breddin' slaves don't get no rights ta talk outta turn."
Apple Root held up a letter. "This here's a writ of breedin's slavery. It says that since yer emp'rah violated the laws of harmony and friendship by first seekin' out war and then declarin' all ponies to be slaughters, any zebra within the borders of Equestria are to be declared free breedin' property fer the ones who capture'em first. Now Ah'm gonna cut ya down. Ya be a good bit of fuckmeat and lay there why my daughters get their plowin' in, or else Imma hafta chop yer hooves off. If ya play nice and please my daughters like a good piece of fuckmeat, Ah'll get ya a nice big pegasus down pillow ta lay on while my daughters gimme and Crabby here plenty o' gran-babies ta fuss over and spoil."
Apple Root folded up the letter and stuck it in his pocket. He then pulled a knife from his belt and cut the rope that was suspending the zebra.
The air rushed out of Zatara's lungs when he hit the ground. Fuji immediately pounced, pinning his upper body to the ground. "Please, just let me go! Don't do this."
A meaty hand struck him across the side of his face and Fuji snarled, "Shut up, fuckmeat!"
"My name isn't fuckmea--AH!"
Another meaty slap struck the side of his face and Fuji balled up a big fist. "Ah said shut it, fuckmeat! Next time ya speak outta turn, Ah'll break yer jaw."
Zatara went to speak again, but Fuji rearing his fist back made him quickly rethink it.
Cinder Apple and Sauce Apple played three quick tosses rock-paper-scissors for the first round. Sauce spat soft curses as she lost.
Apple Root grabbed the zebra's legs, pinning them in place. "Ah got his legs, baby girl. Ya can go 'head and straddle'em without'em kicking too much."
Crabby Apple jerked off the zebra. "Ah'll get'em nice'n hard fer ya. Ya just lower yo'self on down'n Ah'll angle'em fer ya'n then ya can do the rest. Don't worry, he ain't all that big, so it won't hurt, seein' as this is yer first time."
Zatara sobbed softly as the mare force herself on him while he lay pinned to the ground. He squeezed his eyes shut. and tried to put himself miles away. He did everything to deny himself any physical reactions in a vain attempt to deny his captors , but automatic reactions being that they are...a sense of shame and disgust washed over him as his body defied his mind.
For the next few hours he lay there, quietly sobbing as all four of the young mares took their turns forcing them selves on him. Each time his body betrayed his conscious efforts to stop automatic reactions, a little piece of his will broke. After the first hour, his metaphorical tank was dry, and he silently hoped that they would be through. It was not so. Crabby Apple produced a small bottle of sparkling blue potion and pressed it to his lips. At first he resisted, clamping his jaw shut. That bit of defiance got him a sharp kick to his side, and then Fuji pried his mouth open and pinched his nostrils open, while the old mare shoved shove the shout of the bottle in his mouth and stroked his throat, forcing him to swallow. After a couple of minutes, the potion's magic got to work. He became fully erect again and he felt energized. He quickly discovered another effect of the potion, any thoughts of resistance caused a feeling of foggy lethargy to roll across his brain as other thoughts, that were first obtrusive, but with each administration of the potion, became more and more front a center...'Submit.
Once the ordeal was over, Zatara was exhausted. His groin ached and he swore his pelvis had been shifted out of place. The edges of his mind felt ragged, like his very sense of self was just starting to unravel. This small branch of the Apple clan unceremoniously dumped him into the back of a wagon and Fuji hitched herself up to its tongue. The remaining members of the little branch of the Apple clan all piled into the wagon. The zebra lay in the bed of the wagon like a dead fish, partially out of fear, and partially because of the potion-induced thought commanding him to submit.
Red Delicious rubbed a hand across her belly. "Ma, do ya think fuckmeat will make our bellies big'n fat'n round with gran-babies fer you and pa?"
Crabby Apple took her daughter's hand. "B'tween the super-heat spell Princess Celestia cast on all Equestria and the breedin' potions that we keep feeding fuckmeat, all four of y'all'll be a'squeezin' out gran-babies a'fore the summer or fall heat next year."
Zatara sat slumped against the wall of the small shack that he had been locked in, quietly sobbing. He had tried a few times to escape, by attempting to force the door, or prying some of the boards away, but every time he attempted, his thoughts would become foggy, lethargic, and disorganized. The word submit had become louder. It dawned on him that this was why Equestria had never been conquered. He began to weep bitterly, for his fate and the fate of his homeland he'll never see again.
Author's Note
After reading several stories about the zebras conquering Equestria, and through forced breeding regimens and rape, they breed the ponies out, and decided to do a slight inversion of that trope.
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