The Epic Story
The Epic Story
Load Full StoryChapter 1
Ponyville, Equestria
Twilight Sparkle happy strode out of her library and towards her mailbox, eager to see what Princess Celesta wrote to her, little did she know her life was about to change forever. She opened the mailbox, and using her magic removed the letter. It read: To my loyal apprentice Twilight Sparkle, Equestria is in great danger. A force for which we were not prepared, nor expected. My apprentice, the oracle presented me a prophecy today, I was unable to understand parts of it, however you and your friends are clearly involved. I wish only the best of luck to you and your Mare's. Sincerely Princess Celestia
As Twilight began to walk back towards the library, a small piece of paper fell off the back of the letter,
It read: Six mare's and three men shall defeat the Reds in Equestria's time of dread. Twilight, then dashed inside, Spike! Yes Twilight, the little dragon responded. What's a Red asked Twilight? I have no idea, maybe its a kind of food Spike eagerly replied. No, its a type of species of, well I don't know what species a Red is said Twilight. Spike, what are we going to do is your going to check all the book we have for any reference to a “Red”. Well what you gonna do? Asked Spike. I’m going to talk to Lance and see If he knows what a Red is. As Twilight headed towards the door, she heard Spike mumble under his breath, yeah go spend sometime with your ghost coltfriend. Twilight sighed as she headed out the door.
The leaf's crunched as Twilight approached the burial grounds. Hey! Beautiful, what shaking. Twilight jumped, and said Lance don't do that! I'm sorry its kinda hard Lance said. I know you're a ghost Twilight said. Don't remind me, Lance replied. So, what brings you to see me other than my gorgeous looks. I have a question, Twilight said. Shoot, said Lance. What's a Red. A Red? asked Lance.
Yeah, Princess Celestia sent me a prophecy, and its state's that me and the girls will have to work with three men, to defeat somethings called the Reds, Twilight said. You're sure about the letter saying men? asked Lance. Yeah, that what it said replied Twilight. Then it is as I feared, Humans have entered our realm. What a human? asked Twilight. Human's are creatures that are nothing like Equestrians, or any other creatures for that matter, they travel on two legs and have no fur. They are not magical, in fact they deny the existence of magic Lance said. Why have I not heard of them before, asked Twilight. Princess Celesta doesn't want Humans to be well know, for the fact that they are threatening to every aspect of our lifestyle. At least they were one thousand years ago. That’s right Twilight said, you have been a ghost that long. Quite so, Twilight. Yes. Will you do me a favor? asked Lance. Anything, she replied. Good, be cautious with an humans you encounter, there are some who are good natured
and will help you, but others will stop at nothing to destroy you. Thanks Lance, said Twilight. She then hopped up to him and tried to give him a kiss on the check, but went right through him. I hope one day I can give you a real kiss someday, Twilight said, and then she ran off back towards Ponyville. Me too said Lance as Twilight disappeared over the rise, me too.
Chapter 2
Moscow, Russian Federation
Vladimir Putin waved to the massive crowd gathering around the Kremlin. The people in the crowd began to yell “Happy Birthday President Putin”. Some girls tossed flower up to him, which he happily caught. Putin then raised his arm, a signal for the crowd to be quiet, then he began to speak. My fellow countrymen we are on the verge of a new era, an era free from the degradation of the West. An era in which any Russian will be able to afford luxuries such as new cars and plasma TV.'s. This great change which I speak of is coming, far sooner than you realize. You will soon be the envy of every westerner. But my friends, this will not be with out sacrifice. I assume many Russian soldiers will die in the upcoming battles. However, these battles will not be fought on Russian soil, but in a far off land. I wish I could tell you all more, but it is top secret. But soon enough my friends, you will be reaping the rewards of this great victory. Now, enjoy the fireworks. As soon as Putin finished speaking fireworks began exploding all across the sky. Putin then waved one last farewell, and entered the Kremlin, two Spentaz shut the door behind him. Putin then quickly headed to his office. He entered the Tzar bedroom, which he had set up to be his private office. He removed a bottle of Red Star vodka from his cabinet, and poured himself a shot. He quickly gulped down the shot, and began reaching for the bottle, when his buzzer went off. What is Lilly? Putin asked. Comrade Ptrankativich is here to see you she quickly replied. Good, send him in Putin said. Yes, Comrade President. Putin, quickly put away the vodka, and straightened his tie, and sat down at his desk. The door swung open and in stepped Ptrankativich. Ptrankativich almost seemed to slither along the floor as he approached Putin’s desk. Please, take a seat Comrade general Putin said in a kind, almost fatherly voice. With Pleasure Ptrankativich responded. Do you know why I have asked you to Moscow Ptrankativich? Putin asked.
I have no clue Ptrankativich said. You are our finest general, you have never lost a battle? is this correct Putin inquired. Dah, Comrade President. Please, do call me Putin. Dah Putin. Very good Putin said, and the reason I called you to Moscow, is because I want you to lead our attack on Equestria. Equestria? Comrade Putin, Ptrankativich nervously asked. What is wrong my general?Putin asked. No such place exists Ptrankativich inquired, I graduated Moscow university, top of my class, including geography. I do not recall such a nation called Equestria. That my general is because Equestria existence is not generally known Putin said. The nation of Equestria is located inside the Brazilian rainforest Putin continued, meanwhile pulling down a map showing Equestria. The country population is entirely composed of ponies. Ponies! Ptrankativich exclaimed. Yes my general, ponies Putin responded and continued his lecture. There are three types of ponies, earth ponies which have no magical abilities. Pegesi have wings and are able to fly, but they have no magical abilities. Unicorns are the same as earth ponies, which the exception of having a horn and being able to use magic. Pegasus have both wings and horns, and they can use magic. But how do they communicate? Ptrankativich asked. Why they speak perfect English, Putin replied. Amazing simply amazing Ptrankativich said, but what is the objective of this attack? Ptrankativich asked. You are to seize and hold the Sun temple, somewhere in this area, Putin said while in the midst of pointing to an area which appeared to be in the exact center of Equestria. Why is this sun temple so valuable? asked Ptrankativich. Inside there is forty billion in gold Putin responded. Forty billion, Ptrankativich repeated, almost as if he were stuck on the thought. Also my general according to Equestrian legend there is the body of an ancient Equestrian Prince there, and whoever reunites his ghost with his body shall receive limitless power, This is something I crave Putin said. You will capture the gold and Prince and bring both back to Russia! Putin ordered, almost screaming. Do not fail me Ptrankativich, he finished. But what will I lead, our motherland holds a broken sword Ptrankativich retorted. That is just the message I wanted to send, come let me show you what forces you shall lead. When Ptrankativich and Putin stepped out side the Kremlin, the crowd which had been there moments earlier, was gone. Follow me, general Putin said. Putin led Ptrankativich to the back of the Kremlin, the second they rounded the corner All Ptrankativich could see was Tanks. You will have two thousand five hundred thirty eight T-90C tanks under your command, Putin began. You will have one thousand nine hundred twenty one Hind and Hip helicopters. You will have six hundred and four heavy bear bombers. You will have eleven hundred seventy two MiG and Sukov fighter jets. You will have Eight hundred sixty nine artillery, field guns, and anti-tank guns. You will have three hundred and eighty nine BMP-1 armored personal carriers. Three thousand trucks, jeeps, and motor cycles, as well a half a million men, and four hundred eleven mortars. Will these forces be sufficient for the task? Putin asked. Yes, It can and will be done Ptrankativich said while saluting. Your ship leaves in four hours, don't miss it Putin said. Yes Comrade President Ptrankativich said. For the last time its just Putin, Putin said. For the first time in many years Ptrankativich felt that he was leading a true fighting force. He smiled and began to make his way to his office, where the planning would begin.
Chapter 3
46 kilometers outside of Kabul Afghanistan
Go! Go! Go! The Marine shouted as he slammed the door of the Humvee shut. Is that everyone? Frank asked. Yes sir, I was the last one out. Good, then lets get rolling! Frank exclaimed. Frank hand-braked hard as the Hummer skidded through a market, knocking over tables and crushing stands as it roared along. Hostiles roof top called the Marine in the left back seat. Hit em' with the 50.cal Frank cried. The Marine on the Hummer's 50.cal began firing at the Taliban insurgents as they ran across the roof tops.
RPG! The gunner cried out, but it was two late the RPG struck the ground a few feet away from the Humvee. While it did not destroy the Hummer, the gunner received a large piece of shrapnel to the front of his head. He fell into the Humvee screaming in pain. We have to make it across the river yelled the Marine in the passengers seat. I know Frank yelled back. Frank could hear dozens of pings as bullets impacted the Humvee. There's the bridge! said, a Marine. Thank Christ replied Frank. As the Humvee crossed the bridge into the U.S. Held safe zone Frank let out a sight of relief. Were home boys! he, said. All of the Marines even the wounded gunner let out a holler. Frank pulled the Humvee out front of the infirmary, from which two corpsmen ran out caring a stretcher, which they placed the wounded gunner on and carried him into the infirmary. As Frank began to turn around a Marine ran up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. What? Frank asked. General Rose wants to see you sir the Marine responded. Tell him I'll be there in a few Frank said. Yes sir, the Marine saluted and ran back towards the H.Q., Frank began heading in that same direction himself. Frank entered the H.Q. Building and walked to general Rose's office. Frank then knocked on the door. Come in Frank General Rose, said in a friendly voice. Frank, the general started, you my friend are being transferred. Transferred? To where sir? Frank asked. Brazil Rose responded. Why Brazil sir? Frank asked. Because the Brazilians want someone who know how to fight rebels, there having problems in the west, and we told them we'd sent them the best, Rose said. So naturally they send me. Said Frank. Yup, Your Plane leaves at 0900 hours Rose said. Sir that’s only seven minutes Frank said. I guess it is, you better get a move on them Frank, good luck buddy. Rose said. You too general. Said Frank. Frank then dashed out of Rose's office. He ran to the barracks grabbed this M-16A1, and his M-1911, for some reason Frank felt that he needed them now more than ever.
Chapter 4
New York City, New York State, United States of America
Church sat up in his bed, his head was throbbing, and he felt sick to his stomach. He stood up and walked towards his fridge, all the while stumbling around all clumsy. He then opened his fridge, he took a six pack of beer out removed one from the container, popped off the lid, and began to drink. The best cure for a hangover is to get drunk again Church thought. He had soon drank the whole six pack. As he lay drunkenly on his couch. He thought, I love Saturdays. Church them glanced at his clock, it read: 8:42 am Friday. Friday! Church exclaimed. I'm gonna be late for work! Church quickly grabbed a pair of jeans and another beer, and ran out the door. He hopped in his 1980's Toyota Camry and gunned it. He sped through Manhattan, while trying to dodge cars. Church knew he was drunk, but he couldn’t afford to miss work. As he pulled into the parking lot of clucking bell, he forgot to brake and he slammed parked a Chevy Escalade. Church then got out of his Camry and ran inside. He when put on his official clucking bell uniform and went to the cash register. Church then thorough, I made it! He then passed out due to the amount of alcohol in his blood stream. When he awoke he was in his bosses office. Do you know what your blood alcohol level was? Asked Churches boss. Point three? Guessed Church. No! You had a blood alcohol level of 1.2! yelled Churches boss. Is that a lot Church? asked.
Its enough to get you fired, now get out and don't ever come back here again! exclaimed Churches boss.
But I needed this job! Church cried. Get out, If I have to ask you again I'm calling the police, Churches boss said. Yes sir! Church replied. Church then dispassionately walked out of his bosses office and out of clucking bell. As he walked towards his car, two men wearing biker jackets and gold chains approached him. Yo, you the cracker that banged up my ride? The one man, asked. Church then turned and saw his Camry crashed into the Escalade. Listen fellas, I'm really sorry, Church said. We outta cap you, the other man said. Wait, Church said, I can pay you for the damage, how much will it cost to fix it? asked Church. One of the men walked over to the Escalade and said twenty four grand. Really! Church exclaimed. What you didn’t notice Whitey, is that that rig is gold platted, the other man said. Church looked at the Escalade and saw that it really was gold platted. I’m a Fair man, you have two weeks to deliver the cash to this address, the one man said, while handing Church a piece of Paper, with an address scribbled on it. If you don't coff up the cash in two weeks, you will be six feet under my friend, the other man added. Okay, Church said. The two men entered the Escalade, and drove off. Well this is just great, church said. I have two weeks to get twenty four grand, where am I gonna get that kind of money? Church wondered. Just as the thought crossed his mind, as bus drove by, and on the left side of the bus was and ad which read in capital letters: COME EXPLORE THE BRAZLLIAN RAINFORREST, AND DISCOVER ANCIENT TREASURE WORTH MILLLONS! Millions thought Church, I could pay off those two clowns, and buy myself a house. That gives me an idea, Church thought. He hopped into his Camry, and drove to the First National Bank of Manhattan. Church walked up to the tellers window, and asked to remove his entire savings, which totaled up to four thousand thirty eight dollars and four cents. He took the money and returned to his car. Church then drove to the nearest gun store. Church walked into the store and placed the bag holding his life saving on the counter and asked, what can I get for this? The gunsmith looked Church straight in the eyes, and said if anyone asked you, you didn’t come here. Sure thing replied Church. The Gunsmith walked into a back room and returned with an AA-12 and a Barrett 50.cal. I like Church said I'll take them both. Five minutes later church walked back to the car caring the AA-12 And Barrett 50. He put them both in the trunk, thought the Barrett 50.barely fit. He then drove to JFK international airport. He pulled up to the security gate and asked, do you know any pilot who will take someone to Brazil no questions asked? Over there the security guard said pointing to an AH-64 Apache helicopter. Church then drove his car over to the helicopter the security guard had pointed to. Church got out of his car. And walked up to the canopy of the Apache. Can you take me to Brazil? Asked Church. How much money you got? the pilot asked. One and a half grand replied Church. Welcome aboard replied said the pilot while he shook Churches hand. I'm Jerry. Pleased to meet you Jerry replied Church. When do you wanna leave? Asked Jerry. Now would be great said Church. Then let’s go replied Jerry, while he climbed into the Apaches cockpit. Church loaded up his weapons into the Apaches co-pilot copilot then climbed in himself and closed the canopy window. Jerry started the Apaches engines, and the helicopter climbed into the sky. Church had a strange gut feeling that he would not see New York for some time.
Chapter 5
Rio Bravo Texas, United States of America
Easy girl, Cowboy said as he gently rubbed his hand over his horses mane. He was glad to be back, he'd spent to much time down in Mexico. He would finally get to see Jillian, his younger sister again. However, as he approached the farm he felt that something was not right. The animals were running berserk, and no lights were on. Cowboy dismounted his horse about seventy yards from the house. Cowboy took three steps forward when he heard, Stop right there mister! Suddenly, four huge spotlights glared to life and illuminated the farm. Cowboy could see hundreds of men with gun standing in front of the farm house facing him. Cowboy! Its been to long, a figure steeping out of the shadows said. Hutch? Cowboy asked. In the flesh Hutch replied. What are you doing on my farm! demanded Cowboy. Calm down Cowboy Hutch said, I nearly have a proposition to propose. What. Cowboy asked. You go down to Brazil, and hunt down Will, or we'll kill your sister, Hutch said. So, I do down to South America, do your dirty work, and you'll let Jillian live? Asked Cowboy. Not only will I let Jillian live, but I shall also return your farm as a token of goodwill, replied Hutch. Alright, Cowboy said, I'll go hunt down Will for you. He's held up at Sao' Querdin at the old Brazilian army fort, Hutch added. I won't be to long Cowboy said, mounting his horse. As he rode towards Mexico he formulated a plan, he would find Will, but instead of killing him, he would see if Will would help him free Jillian.
Sao' Querdia Brazilian/Equestrian border
Cowboy rode hard for almost two weeks and at the end of this time, he reached Sao' Querdia. As he crossed into Sao' Querdia, Cowboy saw dozens of signs tacked up of which somewhere in English rest Cowboy assumed were Portuguese and they read beware of Equestrians. Cowboy let out a quick laugh, these people are afraid of horses, I guess they have been in the sun to long he said. The fort loomed up ahead, and it seemed to grow in size as he slowly road up towards its main gate.
This is the coolest hiding place ever thought Apple Bloom and she watched the fort from a bush. The best part is Applejack will never find me! Apple Bloom what in tarnation are you doing? Asked Applejack. Quiet! Apple Bloom said, you'll scare off the creatures. Gesturing off in the direction of the fort. What creatures? Applejack asked. Those Apple Bloom said, pointing to the two Russian soldiers on top of the fort. What are they? Applejack asked. I have no idea sis Apple Bloom responded.
Will, Will Lufthansa, come out here right now! Cowboy yelled. Go away Cowboy! Will said, stepping on to the forts front wall. Listen, Will, Hutch has gone crazy. He has taken my ranch, and he's holding Jillian hostage Cowboy explained. Well that’s sad, but why bother telling me? Asked Will. I was hoping that you would come back to Texas with me and help me rescue Jillian said Cowboy. Well you thought wrong, said Will. I know the little game you and Hutch are playing, and you Cowboy ain’t leaving here alive. Will please, were on the same side! Cowboy protested. Too bad said Will, and with that he pulled out his Le Mat revolver and shot Cowboy through the side. Cowboy fell to the ground and passed out. Do you want us to finish him? Asked a Russian soldier. No, replied Will, leave him to the vultures.
We have to help him! cried Apple Bloom. Don't worry said Applejack we'll help him, but we gotta wait till them guards leave. As soon as Applejack finished speaking, the two Russian soldiers climbed off the wall. Come on lets go! said Applejack. Applejack using her teeth bit into Cowboy shirt and she began to pull him back towards her farm. Apple Bloom grabbed his hat with her teeth and began to follow Applejack back towards her Farm. When they reached the Farm Applejack put Cowboy on a bale of hay in the barn. She then went into the house and returned with bandages and a pair of pliers. She soon found the bullet and pulled it out. She rapped his wound with the bandage, put Apple Bloom to bed and then went to sleep herself.
Chapter 6
Republica de naudicva military airport Brazil.
Frank walked towards the Huey helicopter waiting on the tarmac. You must be Kernel Felipe Frank said, Frank Malone as Frank approached a group of Brazilian soldiers. Yes, my friend and you must be Frank Malone the great United States Marine replied Felipe. I wouldn’t say great, maybe good, but not great Frank said. You are too humble my friend Felipe complemented. Personalty, I am glad you are here, said Felipe. Well, that makes one of us said Frank. We will commence the attack on the rebels at 0800 hours declared Felipe. May I see a map of the Territory we're attacking asked Frank. Sure my friend, said Felipe. Felipe removed a map from his back pack and placed it on the Huey's floor. Here is where we shall attack said Felipe. No can do, said Frank as he scanned the map. What do you mean no can do? Asked Felipe. That's Equestrian Territory explained Frank. Come you don't really believe in those old legends? Do you? Asked Felipe. They are not legends, an Equestrian Shining Armor was a member of my squad back in 89' said Frank. So you are on their side? Asked Felipe. Without a doubt said Frank, Shining Armor was one of the most loyal people I’ve ever me, and Princess Celestia is a good and fair leader, I see no reason to attack Equestria. Very well arrest him cried, Felipe. Before Frank could react two Brazilian soldiers hand cuffed him. Load him
on to the chopper instructed Felipe, his knowledge of the area should prove valuable. I'll warn you one last time Felipe, the Equestrian's don't like to have their borders crossed, Frank warned. What are a bunch of Ponies going to do? Asked Felipe, shoot me with a squirt gun! I'm not afraid, cried Felipe as the Huey took to the air. Well that's mistake number one said Frank. As the Huey gained altitude, it was joined by two other Huey’s which flew alongside. Kernel, we have just crossed the border into Equestria, the pilot said. Good, replied Felipe, where are your big tough Equestrian friends now Frank? Felipe inquired. Their coming, said Frank. Fool mumbled Felipe. Then Felipe heard the boom of thunder. I thought the skies were supposed to be clear and sunny said Felipe. They were Kernel said the co-pilot. Them a blue and purple speck shot between the three Huey’s, from it a lightning bolt erupted and struck the left Huey in the tail rotor. We’re going down! the Left Huey pilot cried. A few seconds later the Huey hit the ground. If that thing returns shoot it! Felipe yelled. What is it? Asked a Brazilian soldier. Princess Luna replied Frank. What! Yelled Felipe. Princess Luna who rules Equestria, alongside her sister Princess Celesta wh-, but before Frank could Finish a Brazilian soldier cried her she comes! The door gunner began to fire at Luna with his twin M-60's. The right Huey spun around and began to fire its four 50.Cals at Luna, however all of the bullets went wide. But, Luna's lightning bolt was dead on. She hurled it at the Huey, and it impacted directly into the nose cone of the Huey and the helicopter exploded, and its remains tumbled to the ground. Keep shooting! Cried Felipe. The door gunner continued to fire but missed each time. Don't say I didn’t warn you said Frank. Just as Frank finish speaking Luna hurled another lightning bolt, which struck the Huey tail, blowing the helicopter in two. The front half began a death spiral. Frank vision went red and he blacked out.
27 kilometers from Ponyville, Equestria.
Oh, my head Frank thought as he pulled himself from the crash, from what he could tell everyone else had died in the crash. Frank heard shouting. There's one he heard a voice call. Frank stood up and saw two Equestrian Royal Guard rushing towards him. Wait! Frank yelled I’m on your side. The Royal guards didn’t appear to notice. Frank then realized that he was still hand cuffed. Frank stumbled and fell to the ground. As he hit the ground he saw one of the Royal guards reach him, the guard then took his hoof and hit Frank in the face. Frank was immediately knocked unconscious.
Ponyville, Equestria
Good morning sleepy head Frank heard, his head was stilling throbbing and now his ears were ringing. Where am I asked Frank. You’re in Ponyville, suqarcube corner to be exact. And you are? Asked Frank. I'm Pinkie Pie, the pony responded jumping up and down the whole time. Frank let out deep moan. I can't wait to show you off to all my friends! Pinkie Pie said. That's great Frank said. Frank stood up. You can walk Frank, that’s a good thing Frank thought. Come on! Pinkie Pie yelled, as she ran down the stairs. Hey! Pinkie Pie Frank called, yes she answered. What did you do with my guns? You mean the big black thing and the small silver thing? Asked Pinkie Pie. Yeah, that’s just what I meant Frank said. I gave them to Twilight she say's she going to take them apart. WHAT! Frank cried. Where does Twilight live? Asked Frank. Just up the street, said Pinkie Pie. Take me there said Frank. Sure thing said Pinkie Pie and she bounced along down the stairs and up the street. Frank sighted and began to follow Pinkie Pie to Twilight’s house.
Chapter 7
Sao' Pablo international airport, Brazil.
Church excitedly hopped out of Jerry’s Apache. He then unloaded his gear and began to hike into the jungle. Church decided that the best course of action would be to walk in a straight line from the airport, until he found the ancient Brazilian artifact. It would also prevent him from becoming lost. Church soon found out that it was impossible to walk in a straight line as the jungles foliage, and large rocks blocked his path. Church began to run around like a chicken with its head cut off. It soon started to become dark. He took off in a full sprint for the direction in which he believed the airport was in. Little did he know he was heading in the complete opposite direction. Just as the sun began to set, Church stumbled across a dirt road. There was a sign that read Ponyville 2 kilometers. That's strange thought Church. I thought that they spoke Mexican down here, guess I was wrong. Then Church began to walk in the direction of Ponyville.
Chapter 8
Applejack’s Farm ½ kilometer from Ponyville
Cowboy sat up his side hurt worse than anything he had ever experienced in his life. He realized that he was in a barn. Morrni'n sugarcube Applejack said. Cowboy spun around fast and reached for his gun. When his hand reached his holster he realized that his gun was gone. I took your weapon while you were sleeping, just in case Y’all tried anything stupid Applejack said. Am I dead? Asked Cowboy. No, Y'all ain't dead Applejack responded. But you, your a talking pony said Cowboy. Well you’re, shoot I don't even know what you are, said Applejack. I’m a man said, Cowboy. Well, I know that, what kind of creature are you? Applejack asked. I'm human, said Cowboy. Whats “human”? asked Applejack. My species, its difficult to explain Cowboy said. You got a name Mr.? Applejack asked. Yeah, James, James Riderland, but please do call me Cowboy. Do you misses have a name? Asked Cowboy. Yeah I'm Applejack, but I'm no Misses, just Miss. Ok miss Applejack. Replied, Cowboy. Why don't y’all tell me a little about yourself Applejack encouraged. Not much to say my parents died when I was young. I had to raise my younger sister on my own, its been real tough. Just last year a group of Cattle rustlers stole my whole herd Cowboy said. Sounds a whole lot like me, replied Applejack. My parents both died when I was only twelve and my younger sister Apple Bloom never got to even meet Ma and Pa. My older brother Big Macintosh has done his best to raise us. It has been hard especially for Apple Bloom. But who am I to complain. We've got a good farm with good land Applejack concluded. I wish I were so lucky to have such a temperament said Cowboy. Thanks said Applejack. Do you need any help? Asked Cowboy. Its only fair that I repay you for saving my life. I need to take a cart of Hay into Ponyville, I would appreciate any help said Applejack.. Sure, I'll help you Cowboy. We'd better leave now, said Applejack, its getting dark. How long was I out? asked Cowboy. Little over a day said Applejack, as she harnessed her self to the hay cart. Need help, offered Cowboy. Nah, Y’all can unload the hay when we arrive.
Chapter 9
Ponyville, Equestria
Twilight Sparkle curiously removed the M-16s upper receiver, and placed it on her desk. What are you doing? Asked Rainbow Dash, who had just entered the library while bouncing a ball on her head. I'm dissembling one of the weapons which the human soldier was carrying explained Twilight. Sounds boring Rainbow Dash replied. Why are you bouncing a ball on your head? Asked Twilight. I'm going to set the Equestrian record for the most times a ball has been bounced on a ponies head, Rainbow Dash proudly boasted. The door to the library then flung open and Pinkie Pie hopped in. Pinkie, you almost made me loose my coordination! Gasped Rainbow Dash. Frank then entered the library. What are you doing to my rifle? Demanded Frank. Dissembling it replied Twilight. Frank walked over to the table and began to resemble the M-16 in less than a minute Frank had the M-16 competently resembled. Why did you attack Equestria? Twilight demanded. I didn’t attack Equestria, I was prisoner of the guy's who were attacking Equestria. Oh, Twilight said, her ears drooping as she realized this. Who found me? Asked Frank. Me said Pinkie Pie with a smile. Terrific said Frank, as he reattached the M-16 to the sling on his back.. Where's my .45? asked Frank. Here replied twilight, as she used magic to hand Frank the M1911 pistol. Frank put the pistol in its holster. Good said Frank, now I can get outta here. Wait, Twilight said. What is it Frank replied. There's a great prophecy about to unfold said Twilight, and I believe that you are a part of it. That’s real nice and all, but I have to get back to the Marine Corps and Civilization. Twli, Applejack called from outside. Come on, pleaded Twilight at least meet Applejack. Fine said Frank. As they walked outside the library Frank spotted an Orange pony with a cowboy hat, standing next to a man in a brown duster who was also wearing a cowboy hat. Who are you? Asked Frank. I'm Cowboy, this is Applejack, Cowboy replied. It's good to see another human being out here, said Cowboy. Likewise, replied Applejack, exclaimed Twilight, where did you find him. He was out by the old fort, Applejack explained. He got shot, and I'm nursing him back to health. I see said Twilight. What is with all these humans showing up? Asked Rainbow Dash. I have no clue replied Applejack. Its part of the prophecy, explained Twilight. What prophecy asked Rainbow Dash? Never mind replied Twilight. A sharp scream pierced the air followed by gunshots. Come on! Frank yelled, while cocking his M-16. The six of them rounded a corner to see a unicorn standing over Church. Rarity, what happened? asked Twilight. This creature came out of nowhere and startled me, so I did what any sensible girl would do. Ran away screaming? Asked Rainbow Dash. No, I roundhouse kicked him in the throat, while screaming. As he fell the thing he was carrying went boom! Rarity concluded. He had a gun Frank added. What are you creatures? Asked Rarity. Humans responded Frank, Twilight, and ,Cowboy at the same time. You aren’t going to harm us? asked Rarity. No said Frank. Well that’s a relief said Rarity. Look he's waking up said Pinkie Pie. Church rolled over and sat up. He took one glance around, upon seeing Rarity. He dove to the ground and grabbed her front left hove, yelling please, don't hurt me. Cowboy began to laugh at this sight. What's so funny? asked Church. You're scared of a pony said Cowboy. Well, do you have names? Asked Rarity, Yeah, I 'm Frank that's Cowboy, and I don't know who that is Frank said, pointing to Church. I'm Church, Church said as he stood up. I do believe its time we went and got Flutttershy, said Twilight. Why? asked Church. I want to take you all to Lance, maybe he can fill us in on the prophecy. What prophecy? Asked Church. Come with me and find out, said Twilight. Why asked Church, I wanna find riches. The location to which we must travel hold forty billion in gold. Forty billion? Asked Church.
Yep, replied Twilight. Wait fill us in on the whole thing said Frank. Wait, sorry I'm late said Flutttershy in a timid voice. It's okay Fluttershy, your right on time, said Twilight. Long ago there was a prince who justly ruled over the ponies of Ponyville. However, When Nightmare rose up to confront Princess Celesta, the Prince bravely fought her. He was defeated and Nightmare moon separated his body and soul. His body was locked away in a temple, deep within the Equestrian Jungle. Also Nightmare moon put her entire Treasury there. Which amounted to forty billion in gold bars. Who ever reunites the princes soul with his body shall receive the gold of the temple as payment. That's just what were going to do said Twilight. Now who's with me. Count me in called Rainbow Dash. Sure, said Pinkie Pie, Mine as well tag along said, Cowboy. I'll come, only for the gold though, said Church. Sure dear. Said Rarity. Ok Fluttershy added. Sounds like a good plan, said Applejack. How bout you Frank? No. Frank responded. Why? asked Twilight. Because, I have orders replied Frank. Speaking of which Frank said as he pushed on his comm and began to speak. Overlord, this is Zuni recon 211 standing by for orders over. He gone crazy said Rainbow Dash, talking to himself like that. Solid copy Zuni recon, you are deep in enemy Territory, what gave you the idea to cross into Russia over? Overlord asked. What do you mean, I'm in south america over Frank responded. Roger, that area you're in has been purchased by the Russian Federation from Brazil over. Overlord responded. As for you Frank, you are now K.I.A. We appreciated your service but, you should not of entered Russia, this is Overlord over and out. I don't believe this cried Frank. He ripped the earpiece out and threw it on the ground then stomped it with his boot. Then Frank realized that he could go and get the gold. He would return to the States as a millionaire. Twilight, he said, I changed my mind, I'm coming.
Chapter 10
4 kilometers outside of Ponyville, Equestria
These are your friends I take it? Asked Lance. Well, the girls are replied Twilight. The humans, their more like acquaintances, she continued. So, you're going to go save me?, asked Lance. Sure are, said Frank, only because we want the gold however he added. Yeah, we want the gold alright, added Church. You'll receive your gold as soon as you reunite my body with my soul. Sounds good said Church. So, what's the full story asked Rainbow Dash. Well, all of us are suppose to beat the “red”s said Twilight, what ever a red is. A red is a Commie, explained Frank. A what? asked Rarity. A Commie is a abbreviated term for a communist, however when referring to an individual red that means a Russian soldier. Whats a Russia? Asked Applejack. Russia it's a country, you know like in Soviet Russia President assassinate you! Exclaimed Church. I don’t understand it, Fluttershy said quietly. Frank pulled out a map from his backpack, and said this is Equestria here, Russia is over here. So that what a red is said Twilight. Sure is, replied Frank. Man, Russia is huge! Cried Rainbow Dash. That’s what she said Church. I also heard from command that Brazil sold Equestria to Russia, said Frank. How could Brazil sell Equestria? Asked Rarity. Technically Equestria isn’t a country Frank explained. Its considered part of Brazil officially. So what are these Russian like? asked Rainbow Dash. Well, they don't take prisoners to often, and Russia's military is one of the largest and best equipped armies in the world. So their good? Asked Rarity. One of the best replied Frank. They sound scary, said Fluttershy. I'm not afraid said Rainbow Dash. Well you should be, said Frank. They won't care who or what's in the way, the Russian army will do anything to achieve its goal. Question is what's their goal? Cowboy asked. What if the Russian are after the gold? asked Twilight. Then we have to beat them to it plane and simple, said Frank. Then Lance here can use his Princy magic to lick the Russians. I see only one flaw stated Cowboy. And what is that? Asked Frank. How do you plan to find the Temple Cowboy concluded. We can use Rarity, said Twilight. Me? Asked Rarity. Yes, Rarity's magic ability is she can find jewels, well on the front of the temple there’s a huge ten foot fall, five foot wide jewel Twilight explained. Rarity can lead us right to it. Good plan said Frank. Everyone got what they need? Asked Frank. Everyone replied yes. Well good lets move out, Frank said. Well, good luck then said Lance, as he faded away. Which way Rarity? Asked Twilight. Rarity's horn lit up, North Rarity replied. Lets move people Frank said, as the group set off into the jungle.
Chapter 11
New Moscow airport, Equestria
Ptrankativich's Hind-E helicopter came to a rest at the end of the runway. Ptrankativich opened the side door and stepped down onto the ground. You must be comrade Ptrankativich, said a man wearing the uniform of a red army Kernel. Yes, I'm Alexzanderniv Ptrankativich, Ptrankativich said. Good, I am Boris, the man replied. It is good to meet you, said Boris. I read your file, even the parts the KGB didn’t want me to see, said Ptrankativich. Listen, comrade general I did those thing a long time ago. Boris started. I was very impressed, interpreted Ptrankativich. Really? Asked Boris. Yes, few men have the pure will power you possess. Thank you Comrade general, but I am a mere foot soldier. Your humility is to be commended, comrade said Ptrankativich. Come Boris, I wish to review the men, said Ptrankativich. Have them assembled on the runway in five minutes, Ptrankativich added. Yes, comrade general replied Boris. A few minutes passed and Ptrankativich walked over to his ZiL, a car he had personally had imported from Russia. He sat in the left back seat, and instructed the driver to put the ZiL's rag top down. Boris soon approached, the men are ready for inspection, he told Ptrankavitich. Very good join me comrade offered Ptrankativich. Yes sir! Boris responded, while entering the ZiL's right back seat. Began! Commanded Ptrankativich. The driver started the car and rounded a corner onto the rear runway. Ptrankavitich began to smile, as he looked out onto the runway and all he could see were Russian soldiers. The driver pulled the Zil up to a podium. Ptrankavitich stepped out of the car and walked up to the podium. He then began to speak: Dear comrades of the Red army, do you know why we are here? No, comrade general no, the men shouted in unison. We are here for gold, more gold than you could ever imagine. The first one hundred soldiers who reach the temple containing this gold will be promoted, as well as revive a share of the gold Ptrankavitich continued. When do we attack comrade general? Called out a Russian soldier. Tomorrow at daybreak, replied Ptrankativich. All of the men cheered in joy. And as a personal gift from me all of you have the night to party! Said Ptrankavitich. A second cheer rose up from the crowd. But do not show up drunk tomorrow comrades said Ptrankavitich. Dismissed Ptrankativich finished.
Chapter 12
17 kilometers from Ponyville Equestria
Stop here, said Frank, we'll rest here for the night. I'm tired said Pinkie Pie, and then immediately fell over asleep. Frank took some sticks from the ground and placed them on a rock. He then found a piece of flint, and struck his knife across it creating a spark which ignited the sticks. The fire will keep bugs away Frank said. Goodnight everypony Applejack said and curled up by the fire. Everyone also began to fall asleep. Rainbow Dash, Frank said. Yeah, Rainbow Dash responded. Watch the fire, when everyone's asleep put it out, or Ivan will know where we are come morning. Ivan? Asked Rainbow Dash. It's a nickname for the Russians. Ok, Rainbow Dash said, and then yawned. Frank, will you come here, asked Twilight Sparkle. Sure, replied Frank. The two of them walked about fifty feet from the fire. Do you actually think we have a chance of beating the Russians at this point? Asked Twilight. Yeah, as long as we reach the temple before the Russians. What happens if the Russians make it to the temple before us? Twilight asked. Well for starters, the Russian will use the gold to buy more weapons, maybe take over the whole of Equestria, They may even reform the Soviet Union, said Frank. What's the Soviet Union, asked Twilight. Originally, the Russians controlled fifteen territories outside of Russia, well they ran out of money. So those fifteen territories each became their own nations. Long short of it the Russian wants them back, and Equestria with them. I wonder what they would do to Lance's body? Thought Twilight aloud. Hey, Get some sleep Frank said, heading back towards the fire. Good idea said Twilight.
Chapter 13
New Moscow airbase, Equestria
All units report combat ready comrade general, Boris said. Good Ptrankativich said. Commence the attack. Yes, comrade general, Boris replied. Ptrankativich suddenly felt a wave of excitement rush through him, finally he was leading an army to war, just like he had dreamed of as a small boy. Ptrankativich climbed up onto his waiting T-55 command tank. He felt the tanks V-12 diesel motor rev up. The tank suddenly lurched forward. Ptrankativich stuck his head out of the commander’s hatch, and all he could see in every direction were Russian tanks and troop transports. He began to smile as he dropped back down inside of the tank. Ptrankativich removed a map from the wall, placed it on the commander's table, and began to plot a course. Comrade general, a voice crackled over the radio. What is it? Ptrankativich asked. Our lead tanks have spotted smoke from a fire up head. Is it in the route of our advance? Ptrankativich questioned. Yes, but it is only a campfire, the soldier reported. They must be Equestrian royal guard scouts, come to recon our forces, concluded Ptrankativich. They must be taken alive, Ptrankativich ordered. Yes comrade general, it will be done, the soldier said. Then he signed off the radio. Ptrankativich again smiled, as he closed the commander hatch. Victory felt certain, however, Ptrankativich was in for a rude awaking.
Chapter 14
17 kilometers from Ponyville, Equestria
Twilight no! Twilight heard Lance scream, as she turned around she saw a man approaching with a gun. He walked over to her, picked her up by her horn and said You die now, and then he shot her. Twilight then sat up, she realized she had just had a nightmare. She was breathing heavily. However, she heard a squeaking noise, it was loud and far off. However, it was getting louder by the second. What is that she thought. Frank will know she reasoned. She trotted over to Frank, and poked him with her horn. Wake up, come on Frank wake up, Twilight pleaded. Frank then sat up and asked calmly, What's the matter? Listen, Twilight said. Frank cupped his hands around his right ear and listened. Tank's he mumbled. What is it? Asked Twilight. Tanks! Frank cried. What's a tank? Asked Twilight. A tank is a type of heavy armored fighting vehicle, with a big gun. That doesn’t sound good said Twilight. Come on, we have to wake the others before those tanks get here! Yelled, Frank. Frank grabbed a pan from his backpack, and began to hit it against the butt of his M-16. Everyone, woke up immediately, except Rarity, who continued to snore. She wears ear plugs Rainbow Dash said. Frank walked over and pulled the ear plugs from Rarity ear's. Wake up buttercup, Frank said. I need my beauty sleep Rarity retorted and rolled over. Well, that’s obvious Church pointed out. I mean, just look at your face. Rarity promptly walked over to Church and punched him in the special place. Church fell to his knees gasping for air. Words hurt Rarity said, then walked away. By the way, does anyone else here that squeaking sound? Asked Rarity. I hear it said Fluttershy. Come on, we gotta get moving before those Russian tanks catch up with us, Frank said. What in the name of all things holey is that asked Applejack? That’s a tank replied Frank, As a Russian T-90C smashed through a small sapling. Run, cried Cowboy. They all began to run in the opposite direction of the T-90. How fast can that thing go? Asked Church. Eighty kilometers per hour Frank said. Aw, crap that like one hundred miles an hour Church said. No, its only forty two miles an hour Twilight said. You're going to die a nerd, Church replied. Hey, there another one of those things in front of us! Cried Applejack. Sure enough a second t-90C appeared in the woods ahead of them. Left, Yelled Frank. As they began to run left two T-90C's appeared in front of them. Go Backwards, They began to run to the right, until yet another T-90C emerged. We're surrounded cried Twilight. Not me said Rainbow dash as she flew up towards the sky. Just before she reached the top of the tree canopy, a Hind Helicopter flew over head. Rainbow Dash stopped, turned around and landed next to Twilight. The Ariel escape didn’t go according to plan I take it? Twilight said. Approximately, one hundred Russian soldiers surrounded them, along with the five tanks and the Hind, which shinned a bright spotlight on them. I hope you guys like prison, said Church. As long as they don't have soggy oats, said Applejack. I just hate that, said Cowboy, the oats get all mushy, and then they taste like crap. Shut up! both of you Frank said. Rarity removed a comb from her hair, which she then began to comb. What are you doing? Asked Frank. I can't die looking like this Rarity replied. Frank sighted. The Russians stopped at about a distance of twenty five feet. Then the Russian soldiers just stood there with their weapons raised. A Russian Sargent, stepped in front of the troops and said: we wait, Do not move, you move we shoot. Sounds like a plan said Church, oh what are we waiting for asked Church. Boss to arrive the Sargent said then stepped back in line with the rest of the Russian soldiers. A few minutes later a tank pulled up and a man stepped out. The man was wearing a dark blue Russian general uniform with a hat of the same color which had a red star buttoned on to it. The Man began to speak in Russian. He's speaking in fancy, Applejack said. I wish I could do that, said Cowboy.
Chapter 15
18 kilometers outside of Ponyville Equestria.
Why do they not answer me Boris? Ptrankativich asked. They cannot speak Russian, comrade general, Boris replied. Oh, Ptrankativich said. English yes, he asked. Yes, please said Twilight. Ok, Ptrankativich replied. Why are you here? Ptrankativich asked. We were just camping, replied Twilight. I thought we were going to. Pinkie Pie began, but Twilight stuffed her hoof in her mouth. The Woods can be dangerous place misses, er what is your name, Ptrankativich asked. Twilight Sparkle is my name, and I'm just a miss Twilight replied. I'm Alexzanderniv Ptrankativich, and as I was saying, the forest can be dangerous place. That's why I have my three guides said Twilight, while pointing to Frank, Church and Cowboy. Very good, said Ptrankativich. Now you wouldn’t happen to be on a mission to acquire, ancient Equestrian gold and Prince would you? Asked Ptrankativich, and I would tell the truth. You see I hate liars, Ptrankativich said, undoing the strap for his pistol's holster. We sure are. Pinkie Pie said. Twilight again put her hoof over Pinkie Pie’s mouth, and said not, we are not on a mission to acquire ancient Equestrian gold. Who am I kidding Ptrankativich reattaching the holster strap. You could not even find the gold let alone take it. Were using Rarity, said Pinkie Pie. Excuse me, said Ptrankavitich. Her said Pinkie Pie, she can find jewels with her horn, and there's a big one on the front of the temple, she finished, that's how we are going to find it. What are you doing, tell me truth, or she dies Ptrankativich said as he unholstered his Makarov pistol, and pointed it at Fluttershy. Ok, were on a mission from princess Celesta to save Equestria from the red army, Twilight said. Ptrankativich began to laugh. What's so funny asked Rainbow Dash. You, Ptrankativich said, you really believe that six ponies and three Americans can beat the red army? What a joke. We've beaten Nightmare Moon, and Discord, Twilight said reassuringly. Their not even in the same league as me sweetie. I kill people for fun, Ptrankativich said, you are noting more than an annoyance. He holstered his gun. Load them on to a truck he ordered. Dah, comrade general, two Russian soldiers said, as they began to run towards the motor pool. As soon as we near the temple, I will need your help to locate its exact location. Ptrankativich said to Rarity. I'll never help you, Rarity said definitely. That is why I'm bringing your friends, should you resist, I'll have them shot. You're a monster, Rarity said. No, I personally prefer the term Communist visionary. A ZiL truck pulled up and they were forced into the rear of the truck. A Russian soldier bound them all. Go! Ptrankativich ordered, and the ZiL began to move. Fluttershy began to cry. It's Ok, Rainbow Dash comforted Fluttershy. Don't worry Frank said as the Russian soldier sat down by the ZiL's tailgate. We'll get out of this Frank finished.
Chapter 16
36 kilometers outside of Ponyville Equestria
I can't believe we got captured! Church exclaimed. I can Frank said. Wait, Rainbow Dash, you did put out the fire last night, didn’t you? Asked Frank. Well, I kinda fell asleep, Rainbow Dash replied. That’s how the Russians found us! Frank yelled. You couldn’t do one simple task! Leave her alone, Applejack said, no ones perfect. You can say that again Church said, Frank. Yeah, Frank replied. You know the fortune tellers at fairs, Church began. What about them? Frank asked. I wanna go back to the lady that did mine four days, before I came here, and punch her in the gut. Why? Cowboy asked. Because, she said, that I would go out in search for riches, she didn’t say anything about being tied up in the back of a Russian army truck, man was I foolish to believe that I would actually receive any gold.. Shut up! The Russian soldier sitting next to the tailgate said. I was foolish, said Twilight. I believed that we would make it to the gold, and Lance and I would get married and have a family. Darling, I hate to crush your dreams, but Lance is an Equestrian prince and by law he can't marry you, said Rarity. Don't remind me said Twilight. I'm not going to ask you again, shut up! The Russian soldier repeated. Hey what's that? Frank asked. Where? Asked the Russian soldier as he stood up. Frank then kicked him in the butt, sending the Russian soldier flying out of the back of the truck. What are you doing? Demanded Rarity. Getting us back in the fight replied Frank. Frank then walked over to the Russian soldiers Ak-47. He flipped open the bayonet with his hand, which was still bound to his back, he then used the bayonet to cut the ropes holding his hand together. Who's next asked Frank. Frank walked around the back of the truck and cut everyone free. How, come the driver didn’t notice anything? Applejack asked. Frank then stepped towards the cab. As he approached he heard the soldiers arguing in Russian. I want to listen to Justin Bebier, Ivan demanded. No, we are listening to Anne Murray Chernov protested. Listen, I'm driving, which means I get to pick music Ivan said. I'm shotgun, which means picking music is my job, Chernov argued. Rarity then punched Ivan, knocking him from the ZiL. Applejack immediately, did the same to Chernov, with the same result. Frank hopped into the drivers seat, and Twilight jumped into the passengers seat. Meanwhile in the back, the rest of the group was looking through boxes in the back of the ZiL. Look what I found! Rainbow Dash exclaimed, as she removed an RPG from a large wooden box. What is it? asked Fluttershy. I have no idea, Rainbow Dash replied. Maybe, its one of those fancy hairdryers that Rarity uses, Fluttershy replied. Great thinking Fluttershy! Rainbow Dash said. Now how do I get it to turn on asked Rainbow Dash. Pull the trigger, Fluttershy said. Okay, Rainbow Dash said, as she pulled the RPG's trigger. The RPG fired its rocket through the canvas side of the ZiL's bed, and hit a T-90 in the engine, which exploded. I don't think its a hairdryer, Fluttershy to Rainbow Dash. Oh, sweet Jesus! Frank exclaimed as all the vehicles in the column began to fire at the ZiL. They know were here now, Church said. No, crap Frank replied as he steered the ZiL around an incoming Russian RPG rocket. Why are they shooting at us? Rarity asked. Well, we did shoot at them first, Frank replied. Point well made, replied Rarity. A amphibious Russian jeep pulled along side the ZiL and all of the Russian soldiers aboard unloaded their Ak's into the side of the ZiL. Take out that Duck! Cried Frank. Duck, were? Asked Fluttershy. The Jeep! Yelled Frank. Ok, boss man Rainbow dash said as she jumped onto the amphibious jeep. Rainbow Dash, hit a Russian soldier in the neck, and sent him spiraling off the back of the jeep. She kicked another Russian soldier in the face, and he too fell off the jeep. Applejack and Twilight then also jumped onto the jeep. Applejack cow kicked a Russian political officer in the chest, causing him to do a barrel roll off the back of the jeep. Twilight then shot a burst of magic dust into the Russian soldier eyes who was driving the jeep. He fell to the floor of the jeep in pain, and Rainbow dash pushed him off the jeep. There's one left cried,Twilight. Wait, Applejack said, he's the guy from the fort. Will! Cowboy cried out. Will went for his gun, but Cowboy was quicker. He picked up an Ak-47 off the floor of the ZiL, and threw it at Will, the butt of the Ak struck Will in the temple, and knocked him out. Applejack, you steer, Twilight instructed. I'll handle the acceleration, and braking, Rainbow Dash, you'll shift. Twilight hopped under the Jeep front seat, and Pushed her hoof onto the gas, and the jeep bolted forward. Applejack grabbed the wheel and tried to steer the jeep. Rainbow Dash hopped into the passengers seat. There Ptrankativich called out Applejack. Ptrankativich's jeep seemed to be heading straight for them. Frank, braked hard, and sent the ZiL flying down an ancient dirt road. Boris, drive me closer! Demanded Ptrankativich, as her raised his Ak-47. It is Ptrankativich alright said Rainbow Dash, as he began to fire. Rainbow Dash ducked down between the console and the seat. Don't worry sugarcube, Applejack said, he couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn door. Just as Applejack finished speaking Ptrankativich shot the drivers side mirror off. Ptrankativich then again raised the Ak-47 to fire, but when he pulled the trigger, all he heard was a sharp click. Out of ammo Boris said. Pull along side, ordered Ptrankativich. As Boris did so, Applejack jerked the wheel hard left. The Jeeps collided, sending Ptrankativich flying forwards, as he feel Ptrankativich desperately grabbed on to the DShK machine gun mounted on the front of Applejack’s jeep. The gun swung around, and Ptrankativich accidentally pulled the trigger. A storm of bullets flew over Applejacks head as she ducked. The DshK obliterated the windshield. Twilight stomped on the brake with her hoof. Ptrankativich flew off the Dshk and hit the ground hard. However, He stood up withdrew his Markarov pistol and fired at Applejack, Twilight and Rainbow Dash. Twilight again gunned it. Boris, pulled the jeep along side Ptrankativich. Are you alright comrade general? Asked Boris. I'm fine replied Ptrankativich as he climbed into the jeep. Maybe next time you'll wear your searbelt Boris said smiling. Ptrankativich shot Boris a dirty look, and Boris quit smiling and began to again pursue Applejack, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash.
Chapter 17
43 kilometers outside of Ponyville Equestria
Applejack swung the jeep down the same road, Frank had driven the ZiL. Applejack noticed a cliff, which Frank had pulled the ZiL up to. Meanwhile at the cliff, Frank had began to repel towards the bottom which, a river ran through. Come on, Frank called. Okay dokey, Pinkie Pie said and jumped off the cliff into the water. Is she Ok? Frank asked. Yes, Pinkie always does things like that Rarity replied. Well, get repelling Frank said. We'll have to cross the river if we wanna beat the Russians to the temple.
That looks really scary Fluttershy said. Yeah, Church said in agreement, I could fall to my death. Listen, Frank said, either you repel down or, I'll push you off. Take your hoof off the gas! Applejack yelled to Twilight. Its stuck! Cried Twilight. Oh, crap are they gonna hit us? Church asked dumbfounded. The jeep then plowed into the ZiL, knocking them both off the cliff into the water. Is everyone alright? Frank asked. Were just dandy, said Cowboy. Eventually everyoneemerged from the wreckage unharmed. That was awesome! Said Rainbow Dash, lets do it again! How about lets not, suggested Church as he unwrinkled his tee shirt. I had this shirt signed by 50 Cent, you better pray to god, that its not ruined. You alright Will? Asked Cowboy. No thanks to you, Will replied bitterly. You shot me! Cried Cowboy, you better thank God it wasn’t the other way around or you'd be dead. Listen Cowboy, I had to shoot you. Will began. I needed to earn the trust of the Russians, so that I would receive a portion of the gold. And that was more important to you than my trust? Asked Cowboy. You didn’t have any gold Will replied. The only reason were bring you Cowboy said, is so that you don't tell Ptrankativich which way were going Cowboy said. Come on people, Frank said lets get moving, We need to put as much distance between us and the Russians as possible. Which way Rarity? asked Twilight. Northwest, replied Rarity. The group set off in that direction, with Will following them. Come on Will pick up the Pace called Cowboy. Will stopped for a moment, threw a beacon into the ground, and then ran to catch up with the others.
Chapter 18
44 kilometers outside of Ponyville Equestria
Both vehicles appear to be total right offs comrade general, a technical sergeant said glaring off the cliff. Yes, good work you may return to your unit Ptrankativich said. The sergeant saluted and walked off towards the column. Ptrankativich gaised at the wreaked jeep and ZiL below, he began to wonder if any of them had survived the crash. Comrade general! A private cried as he ran up to Ptrankativich. What is it boy? Ptrankativich asked. A tracking beacon was just placed on the other side of the river, the private said. Very good Ptrankativich said, and so our spy is in place. We will follow the beacons, until we reach the temple. Have a bridge construed across this river at once! Ordered Ptrankativich. Yes, comrade general, the private replied, and walked off. Ptrankativich pulled out his binoculars, and gaised across the river. So they had survived the crash, pity Ptrankativich thought. Well, now the games begin Ptrankativich thought as he watched the T-55 bridge layer begin to unfold its bridge.
Chapter 19
49 kilometers outside of Ponyville, Equestria
Hey, Cowboy, would you mind explaining something to dim witted farm gal like myself, asked Applejack. Sure, and you ain't dim witted Cowboy replied. Why does that gun of yours have two triggers? Applejack asked. Well you see, the back trigger sets the rifle said Cowboy, then all you have to do is breath on the front trigger, and she’ll fire. What kind of gun is it? asked Applejack. Don't get him started, groaned Will. My rifle is a Shiloh Sharps 1874 heavy barrel buffalo rifle, Cowboy said. She's chambered for the 45.-70 government, and she'll kill a buffalo at two hundred yards with a single shot. I'm just happy that Ptrankativich put my rifle in the same truck, otherwise I would have had to go through that Russian column until I found her. Well my Barrett’s far more powerful, scoffed Church. That thing belongs in a museum. Have you even fired that there rifle? Asked Cowboy. Yes, said Church. Applejack and Cowboy both glanced at Church. Ok, I’ve never shot it, but what difference does it make? Asked Church. Lotta difference said Frank, Cowboy knows his way around that rifle, just like I know my way around mine. Hey guys, Rarity called. What up? Asked Frank. Were getting close to the temple, I can feel it, Rarity said. Good Twilight said. Twilight, said Rarity. Yes, responded Twilight. I'm sorry about what I said about you and Lance back in the truck, I really do hope its works out for the two of you darling. I appreciate that Rarity, but what you said is true, Lance is a prince, he can never marry me. That’s sad and all, but we have bigger fish to fry said Frank. Frank, do you even have a heart asked Fluttershy. Yeah, doctor said I had to keep it to pump blood, or I'd would have had it surgically removed Frank joked. Church let out a quick chuckle. Hey, hate to break up the parade but were here Rainbow Dash said. How do you know? Asked Frank. The big jewel was a dead giveaway, said Rainbow Dash. Sure enough directly ahead of them a massive temple loomed, with a massive blue ruby on the front. How do we get in? asked Frank. I have no idea Twilight said. Then a giant blue light shot out from the diamond and appeared to shoot through each of the ponies. Then the light shut off, and the front of the temple lifted up, revealing the gold. That temple's massive, whined Rainbow Dash, It gonna take forever to Find Lances body in there. Alright all you freeze said Will. As they all turned around, they saw Will had with drawn his LeMat revolver and was leveling it at them. I'm calling Ptrankativich said Will, I'm gonna be rich he said pushing a large red button on the radio he was carrying. Cowboy with drew his Cattleman revolver and shot the radio out of Will's right hand, and the LeMat out of his left. Stay, Cowboy said to Will. Everyone get inside, said Cowboy. They all ran inside, immediately the front of the temple slid close. Cowboy then holstered his gun. I doubt Will or even Ptrankativich for that matter will be able to get through this Cowboy said rapping on the hard stone of the temple. The temple was lit by paper lanterns. How big is this place? asked Church. Its five hundred meters wide by one thousand meters long. How big is that in English. Asked Church. Very big said Twilight. Aw, crap said Church. Wait, how are we gonna get the gold outta here? Asked Applejack. Now that I do know said Twilight, Lance will use his magic to sent each persons share of gold to their homes. Sweet! said Church. Now all we have to do is Find Lance's body, said Frank. Split up, said twilight yell if you find Lance.
Chapter 20
46 miles outside of Ponyville Equestria
Comrade general, a beacon showing the location of the temple was just placed, aRussian radio operator said to Ptrankativich. Good, how far away is it? Asked Ptrankativich. Five kilometers the radio operator said. Ptrankativich, again climbed out of the commander's hatch of his T-55. Ptrankativich removed his binoculars from his belt, and began to look for the temple, as he panned to the right, he noticed an enormous brick structure. There’s the temple Ptrankativich said, as he moved back into the tank. Send this message to Moscow, Ptrankativich began. We have reached primary objective enemy resistance, nonexistent. Sent it now Ptrankativich finished. Yes, comrade general the radio operator said, as he began to send the message. Also tell the Spentaz to board their helicopters and meet us at the temple, ordered Ptrankativich. Victory is near, I can feel it in my veins, Ptrankativich said. Are you sure it’s not your blood pressure comrade general? The Radio operator asked. Ptrankativich shot him a dirty look, and he went back to sending the message.
Chapter 21
Moscow, Russian Federation
Putin, paced back and forth nervously, he had not had contact with Ptrankativich, since Ptrankativich had launched his offensive. Comrade President, a KGB officer called from down the hall. What is it? Asked Putin. Message from general Ptrankativich, his troops have reached their primary objective, he also reports that resistance from the enemy was been almost nonexistent the KGB officer said. Very good, Putin replied. Tell, Ptrankativich that he can expect a promotion when he returns home Putin said. Very, well comrade President, the KGB officer said, walking off towards the commutations office. Putin walked into his office, shut the door and began to drink a shot of vodka, its seemed that his confidence in Ptrankativich was well placed. I wonder what I should buy with my gold Putin began to think.
Chapter 22
Inside the sun temple, Equestria
Twilight continued to search for Lances body, she saw no signs of it. She rounded a mound of gold bars, and in front of her stood Lances body. Hey, everypony I found Lance, cried Twilight. Good Frank said while he ran up, now wake him up and let’s get outta dodge. I don't know how said Twilight. Allow me, said Frank. Rise and shine maggot! He yelled at Lances body. Lance had no reaction. Huh said Frank, well I'm all outta ideas he said. Well we have to reunite his soul with his body, said Twilight. How do we do that? Asked Frank. Again, I have no clue, said Twilight. Frank slapped Lances body, but still no response. This is crazy, but I think it might work said Twilight. What? Asked Frank. Twilight then leaned out and kissed Lances body. Lances eyes suddenly shot open, as everyone else arrived. You have no idea how good it feels to be back in your body after two thousand years, Lance said. Twilight hugged Lance. Come on, Frank said. We gotta get outta here before the Russians show up.
Chapter 23
Outside of the sun temple, Equestria
Ptrankativich's command T-55 pulled up to the outside of the temple, and Ptrankativich exited the tank.
Comrade General! A private called. What is it now? Ptrankativich demanded. We found him here sir, the private said. Ptrankativich looked past the private, and saw two more privates holding Will prisoner. What shall we do with him? Asked the private. Release him immediately demanded Ptrankativich, he is the one who lead us to this temple. Yes, comrade general. The Two Privates walked away from Will. Have my men harmed you in any way? Ptrankativich asked. No, said Will. Good, replied Ptrankativich. Please come with me to my personal tent, we will have a drink, Ptrankativich added. Sounds good to me, said Will. As Ptrankativich and Will approached Ptrankativich's command tent, they could see the Russian soldiers hammering in the stakes to hold the tent down. Ptrankativich held open the tent flap for Will. Thank you, Will said. Please sit, said Ptrankativich. Will sat down at the small wooden table which was serving as Ptrankativich's desk. Ptrankativich reached into a cabinet sitting on the floor, and removed a bottle of vodka from it. Ptrankativich sat down across the table from Will. I believe that I have earned a raise, said Will. Is that so? Ptrankativich said. First let me ask you a question, are you pure at heart? Ptrankativich asked. What kind of a stupid question is that? Retorted Will. Let me spell it out for you said Ptrankativich, are you good or evil? Well, I'm obviously good said Will. Let’s find out, said Ptrankativich. You take a test to see if you are good or evil, Ptrankativich said, you pass as good, and you will get your raise. Fail as evil, and well you'll get less than a raise, and I can pay you your original price, and you can walk out of here right now. I'll take the test, said Will. I'm as good a person as one can be. Is that so, Ptrankativich said removing a small container from the cabinet. Ptrankativich then removed a spider from the container and placed it on Will's shoulder. Wait, I thought I was gonna take a test said Will. You are, that is an Equestrian soul spider. If you are pure and good at heart, the spider will not bite you. However, if you are evil, and corrupt, the spider will bite you. Also you do not want to be bitten, for a single bite from this spider will kill a fully grown elephant in minutes, and there is no anti venom, Ptrankativich stated. What do I have to worry said Will smiling. Just as Will finished speaking, the spider bit into his elbow. Will cried out in pain, He then squished the spider with his hand. You, knew it would bite me, said Will. This is true, for you are truly evil like me, I could see it in your eyes when we first met. I'll kill you Will said, as beads of sweat rolled down his face. Will pulled out his LeMat revolver, and tried to aim it at Ptrankativich, however he had become so weak from the spiders bite, he dropped the LeMat. Will then fell to the floor dead. Ptrankativich smiled, I guess I’m not going to have to pay you after all Ptrankativich said. Ptrankativich called for two Russian soldiers. Two privates ran in and saluted. Dispose of his corpse, we cannot have it stinking up the place Ptrankativich ordered. One of the privates grabbed Wills feet, and the other grabbed Will's head. Together they carried Will's body out of the tent. Ptrankativich followed them out of the tent. A political officer ran up to Ptrankativich. We cannot get inside the temple, the Political officer said. Then use a tank Ptrankativich said, ram your way through. Yes Comrade general the Political officer said. Then the Russian soldiers began to pick the temples entrance apart, brick by brick, while engineers used a T-55 fitted with a bulldozer blade to smash apart the entrance. We're through! cried a Private. Good said Ptrankativich, find the prince and bring him to he me. Ptrankativich ordered, as he boarded his Hind helicopter, which had landed only moments earlier. What if we run into the Americans and the Ponies, asked a sergeant. Kill them, ordered Ptrankativich.
Chapter 24
Inside the sun temple, Equestria
I think the temple has been compromised, Rarity said. What makes you say that? Asked Frank. I'm guessing it’s has something to do with the mob of Russian soldiers coming straight for us! Rainbow Dash cried. Well, it looks like where going to plan B said Frank. Which is? Asked, Church. We fight our way out Frank said. Finally, said Rainbow Dash. I’ve been wanting to teach these commie losers a lesson in manners. That's barbaric said Rarity. Got a better plan? asked Cowboy. The Russian soldiers stopped, and lowered their Ak's. There not actually going to-, Rarity began, but before she could finish all of the Russian soldiers opened fire. Cowboy removed his buffalo rifle from his sling and shot a Russian soldier in the head, another Russian soldier ran at Cowboy with his Ak's bayonet shining under the temples light. Cowboy ejected the buffalo rifles cartridge, which hit the Russian soldier in the eye. Cowboy then hit the Russian soldier in the sack, with the butt of the buffalo rifle. As the Russian soldier collapsed, Cowboy delivered a final blow to his neck, again with the Buffalo rifle's butt stock. Rainbow Dash, flew up to a Russian political officer, and punched him in the gut with her right front hoof, he crumpled to the ground. Rarity ran up and karate kicked a Russian soldier in the face. He fell to the ground unconscious. Release the dogs, commanded a sergeant. Dogs! Frank cried, as Russian attack dogs burst into the temple. All of the dogs went after Fluttershy, who then flew to a passage way filled with gold bars. Applejack cow kicked a technical Sargent in the chest, and he went flying. Tank! Cowboy yelled as a T-90C burst through the front of the temple. I've got this said Lance, as he jumped at the tank, and cut the barrel clean off with his horn. The tank commander then began to fire the tanks Dshsk machine gun at Lance. Lance climbed up the front of the tank, and stabbed the tank commander through the head with his horn. Lance then pulled a grenade off the dead tank commander, pulled the pin with his teeth, and threw it into the tank. Twilight shot a beam of magic at an approaching Russian soldier, and he fell to the ground covering his face, screaming in pain. Frank came up behind him removed his knife from its scabbard and slit the Russian soldiers throat. Frank! That gross! Rarity yelled. Fun fact, Frank replied, it takes one hundred forty three mussels to frown, One hundred and seventeen to smile, and only one hundred and thirteen, to slice some ones throat. Where on earth did you learn that? asked Rarity. The internet, replied Frank. What's that? asked Rarity. I'll explain later Frank said, dodging an incoming Russian soldier. Frank then grabbed the Russian soldier AK-47, and hit the Russian soldier in the face knocking him out. Twilight ducked as an RPG whizzed over her head. Are you alright? Asked Lance. I'm fine said Twilight, not paying attention behind her, as a Russian soldier armed with a knife ran at her. Lance ran over to Twilight, picked up an AK-47 off a dead Russian soldier, broke off the bayonet, and threw it at the charging Russian soldier, hitting him right between the eyes. God your beautiful Lance said to Twilight. Your not so bad looking yourself Twilight said. Lance put his arm around Twilight, we don't have time for this right now she said. We'll make time said Lance. Twilight and Lance then began to kiss. Yet another Russian Soldier began to charge at them, Lance with his other arm, picked up the AK-47 and unloaded half of the magazine in the Russian soldier. Oh, get a room! Yelled, Church. Lance and Twilight immediately pulled away and returned to fighting Russians. Church unloaded his AA-12s magazine into a group of twelve Russian soldiers. Every single one dropped. That was awesome! Church cried.
Chapter 25
Outside the sun temple Equestria
Comrade General, President Putin wishes to congratulate you and tell you that you shall receive a promotion upon your return to Moscow Boris announced. Very good Ptrankativich said as he heard another burst of gunfire from inside the temple. Putin also wishes for you to return to the airfield, he wishes to brief you on the next phase of our operations Boris said. Very well Ptrankativich said, as he began to walk towards his Mi-8 Hip helicopter. Oh, comrade Boris, Ptrankativich said. Yes, comrade general? Replied Boris. If these ponies and Americans are not defeated in five minutes, send in the Spentaz. Yes, comrade general Boris said, as he saluted. Ptrankativich then boarded the Hip, which then took off. He had a strange gut feeling that he had just cheated death.
Chapter 26
Inside the Sun temple Equestria
How many of these guys are there? Asked Lance. Five hundred thousand, replied Frank. Crap, Church said, that like a million. No, that’s only half a million, corrected Twilight. This is so uncivilized Rarity commented as she punched a Russian soldier in the side of the head. Man, we are just kicking these guys butts said Rainbow Dash, as she slapped a Russian soldier in the face with her wings, and then dropped him with a punch to the gut. Frank shot two Russian soldiers with his M-16, then pulled out his 1911 pistol and fired three rounds into a Russian soldier, who crumpled to the ground. Look what I got! Pinkie Pie said excitedly. Oh, sweat Jesus, Church said. It’s a party cannon, Pinkie Pie said. A Party Cannon? Frank asked. Yeah, watch Pinkie Pie said, as she clutched the cannons firing string in her mouth and pulled. A massive amount of confetti, shot out of the cannon, and nailed a squad of Russian soldiers heading for them. The confetti knocked the Russians out cold. Well, I'll be said Applejack. It does work stated Cowboy, as He lowered his Buffalo rifle and shot a Russian Lieutenant in the head. Rainbow Dash, Punched a Russian soldier in the side of the head, and he fell to the ground. Where's Fluttershy? asked Twilight.
Inside the deepest bowels of the temple Fluttershy was surrounded by Russian attack dogs. Just as an attack prepared to lung. Fluttershy flew over to the dog, and began to scratch, its stomach. The dog, instantly became docile. Oh, your paw said Fluttershy, as she flew over and pulled a thorn out of another dog’s foot. They never give you love? Do they, said Fluttershy as she began to pet and scratch each of the dogs. Soon enough all of the dogs were licking Fluttershy and playing like puppies. Then a Russian political officer, and two Russian soldiers entered the hallway. Look what we have here Yuri, The Political officer said, as Fluttershy backed into the corner of the hall. She is so cute! Said the other Russian soldier. Both the political officer and the soldier shot the other soldier dirty glances. She will make a fine example, the political officer said, he picked up Fluttershy by her coat. She squealed in pain and fear. The attack dogs suddenly became irritate. What is up with these hounds? Asked the political officer. As soon as he had finished speaking, the dogs attacked both of the Russian soldiers, and the political officer, who in shock, dropped Fluttershy. Before she could hit the ground, a dog caught her, then proceeded to lick her. Fluttershy laughed, and said, I have to get back to my friends, but thanks for your help. The dog again licked Fluttershy, then ran over to the political officer and bite his throat, killing him. The other dogs killed the two Russian soldiers. Fluttershy then began to fly down the corridor back towards the temples main room. Where were you sugarcube, we were worried sick! Applejack’s said. I was just making some new friends Fluttershy responded. Hey, what’s that noise? Lance asked, as he stabbed a Russian soldier in the chest with his horn. Choppers! Frank cried, as the whole roof of the temple exploded. Eleven Hind helicopters were hovering overhead. Then ropes fell out of the Hinds, and Spentaz slid down. These aren’t average Russian troopers, look how fancy their uniforms are, Rarity said. There Spentaz, watch out Frank said, these guys don't react to pain. Everyone reacts to pain, Rainbow Dash said, as she charged at the Spentaz, She punched a Spentaz in the face and gave him a bloody nose. The Spentaz operator, merely smiled, and responded by drop kicking Rainbow Dash across the room. You have to do it like this darling, Rarity said, as she ran up and punched a Spentaz in the jimmy. He did not react at all, he merely, glanced at Rarity. No way, are you a real man? Rarity asked. The Spentaz operator, reached down and grabbed Rarity by her left ear, and lifted her off the ground, with his other hand, her removed his Makarov pistol from its holster, held it to Rarity’s head, and said: You die. After you friend Cowboy said as he shot the Spentaz operator, in the head with his buffalo rifle. Rarity fell to the ground. My hair! She cried, these monster have messed up my hair, they shall die! Rarity declare, as she punched a Spentaz officer in the neck, shattering his spine. She then picked up His AK-74U and fire a full magazine into the Spentaz. She karate kicked another Spentaz in the face. Run comrades! Yelled a Russian soldier. No, one shall escape said Rarity, as she picked up an AK-47 unfolded the bayonet, removed the magazine, and threw the AK, like a spear. The AK, hit a Russian soldier in the back, and he collapsed to the ground. Rainbow Dash roundhouse kicked a Russian soldier, knocking him out. I'm outta ammo, Church cried! Frank fired his M-16 into a mob of Russian soldiers, and Spentaz charging at them. They all fell to the ground dead. Frank dropped his M-16s magazine and reached into his backpack, for another, however he found out that he was out of ammo. He then withdrew his 1911, and fired four rounds, but then his pistol too was out of ammo. Cowboy loaded his buffalo rifle and fired hitting a Russian soldier in the shoulder. We'll never be able to fight all these guys! Cried Twilight. Here come more of em! Yelled Applejack, as she punched a Russian soldier in the back, then she kicked a Spentaz operator in the face. Twilight, called Lance. What is it? Asked Twilight. Teleport
you and all of your friends to high ground! Lance said, as he stabbed yet another Russian soldier with his horn. What about you? Asked Twilight. I'm going to finish this once and for all. Lance replied. Ok, said Twilight, and one last thing Twilight said. What? Asked Lance. I love you said Twilight, as she kissed Lance, then teleported away. Die you freaking commies Frank, cried. Then he went to stab a Russian sergeant, but just before the knife hit the sergeant, Frank, and the others were teleported away.
Chapter 27
one kilometer outside the sun temple Equestria
Where are we? Asked Rainbow Dash. Just outside the temple informed Twilight. That was so much fun! Exclaimed Pinkie Pie! Lets do it again! How bout lets not, suggested Applejack. Where's Lance? asked Cowboy. He said, he was going to finish this Twilight said. Well, whatever he's doing, he'd better do it fast Frank said.
Chapter 28
New Moscow airbase, Equestria
Comrade General, our forces are reporting heavy losses, a private informed Ptrankativich. Ptrankativich sighed. How is it possible that the Russian army is being beaten by Ponies! Ptrankativich exclaimed. I do not know said the Private. I want three Hinds combat ready and off the ground in five minutes! Ordered Ptrankativich. Yes, Comrade General the private saluted, and walked towards the command center. As my mentor Andropov used to say, If you want something done do it yourself said Ptrankativich to himself, as he walked towards the Hinds waiting on the airstrip.
Chapter 29
The sun temple Equestria
Lance used his magic to rise fifty feet in the air, then he began to speak in perfect Russian, soldiers of the Red army, you have fought gallantly, but you are fighting for an evil, and corrupt government. The Russian soldier raised their rifles to fire. I wouldn’t recommend that course of action Lance said. Shoot that Fascist dog, he spreads lies about our motherland ordered, a political officer. Very well, said Lance have it your way. The ground began to shake, and the Russian soldiers saw a massive forty five foot tall wall of water rushing their way. Run Comrades! Cried a Russian sergeant. The entire Russian army began to run, but the water was coming too fast, the water wiped out the temple, destroyed the Hip helicopter which was taking off, and completely destroyed the fleeing Russian troops. The wave, destroyed tanks, like they were made of paper, and destroyed every Russian soldier or machine, with in a one kilometer radius of the temple. Lance then teleported over to Twilight and the others. What about the gold? Asked Church. I'm sorry Lance said, but some sacrifices had to be made. Well this is just great, now how am I gonna pay those Crisps asked Church. It’s gonna be alright said Applejack. We did win said Frank, as the door of a ZiL truck floated by. Not yet said Rainbow Dash, as the familiar sound of helicopter blades filled the air. No problem said Cowboy, Lance can just use his unicorn magic on them. No I can't said Lance. Why no? Asked Frank. Doing spells is exhausting replied Lance, and if a unicorn performs magic for two long, it will kill them said Lance. Well you do realize that we all out of bullets, Cowboy said. Then three Hind-E helicopters crested over hill. The Hind flew up to them and landed. About thirty armed Spentaz and Ptrankativich stepped out of the Hinds. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH PAIN YOU ARE ABOUT TO SUFFER! Cried Ptrankativich. You may kill us, but you've already lost, the golds gone. Said Frank. Silly capitalist dog, you think this was about the gold, it was not. It’s was about him Ptrankativich said, pointing to Lance. What? Asked Lance. You see, we have been able to decipher Equestrian enough to know that Lance has great power, my motherland wishes to be the owner of that power. As for the rest of you, you shall be shot. Ptrankativich said. Wait, Lance said, I'll go without a fight as long as they aren’t harmed. Very well Ptrankativich said. The Spentaz started back towards theirs Hinds. However two Spentaz ran up to Twilight, put a burlap sack over her head, and threw her onto Ptrankativich's Hind. She is protection , Ptrankativich explained, if you follow us, she dies. Ptrankativich climbed into
his Hind. Two Spentaz hand cuffed Lance, and threw him next to Twilight. Ao Cbnaahna Ptrankativich said as his hind departed. NO! Cried Applejack. I was wrong Frank said, we lost.
Chapter 30
One kilometer outside of the sun temple Equestria
We need to go after them, cried Rainbow Dash, as she began to take off. Applejack grabbed Rainbow Dashes tail, and pulled her to the ground. We can't just go after them Ptrankativich will kill Twilight, we need to come up with a plan said Applejack. I'm going home said Church. We can't give up now, we've come so far, said Rarity. Didn’t ask for any of this, all I wanted to do was get some gold to pay the crisps, not get chased by the Russian army through the freaking jungle, Church said. I'm not some great fighter, like Frank. I work at a fast food restaurant for Christ’s sake. Listen, Sugarcube, everything gonna be alright, Applejack comforted. No, it’s not said Church, These gang bangers are gonna kill me when I get back to the states, that is if I even make it back to the states. At least stick with us till we finish this thing said Rainbow Dash. But we don't even know where they took Twilight, how are we supposed to rescue her? Asked Rarity. Let me make a phone call said Frank, as he pulled out his I Phone.
Chapter 31
CIA headquarters Langley Virginia, United States of America
Hello, Gary said as he picked up his phone. Gary, this is Frank, Frank said. Oh, hey Frank, how are you doing buddy, Afghanistan treating you well? Gary Asked. Well Gary, I'm not in Afghanistan anymore replied Frank, I'm in Equestria. Oh, well what can I do you for? Asked, Gary. I need a list of all Russian ships in the Atlantic, that are heading back to Russia. Ok Gary said, just give me a minute. Gary rolled his chair to his computer, and began to type. The results soon popped up. Ok Frank, I got two ships, ones a Russian tanker which left Key West two days ago, and a, freighter which left port from Rio De Santa ten minutes ago, Gary said. What’s the name of the freighter asked Frank. The Moldova, Gary replied. What’s her heading asked Frank. She is going straight, at course 30, 72 Remus. Ok said Frank. Thanks for the info Gary, I owe you one. No problemo said Gary.
Chapter 32
Norfolk naval base Norfolk Virginia, United States of America
Hello, Admiral Chairwood speaking. Hey Chairwood, it’s Frank, Frank said. How you doing devil dog? Chairwood asked, with a hint of laughter in his voice. I wish I were calling for fun, but this is a matter of national security, Frank said. Lay it on me Chairwood said, his voice now completely serious. We have a Russian freighter, heading for Murmansk, caring a VIP. So, how is this matter of National security? Asked Chairwood. The VIP, is an Equestria prince who has enormous magic powers, the Russian wanna use his power, to wipe the U.S. Off the map, explained Frank. Good god, said Chairwood, I thought Equestria was just an old spook story. Oh, it’s real said Frank, I've got the scars to prove it. What do you want me to do? Asked Chairwood. I want you to send the Navy, and send that boat to the bottom, once, we’ve rescued the prince. Rodger, we actually have a navel task force, in the region, Chairwood said. The naval task force, will intercept the freighter at 1200 hours, that give you two hours to rescue the prince, If you don't have the prince in two hours, we'll he’s going down with the ship, said Chairwood. Thanks, said Frank. Hopefully the next time we talk, we'll be able to shoot the breeze a little said Chairwood. Me too, said Frank, as he hung up. Frank sure is a character, Chairwood thought, as he glanced out his window and onto the navy yard.
Chapter 33
Russian freighter Moldova, 50 kilometers of the coast of Brazil
Lance, are you alright, asked Twilight. I'm fine he replied, they didn’t hurt you did they? asked Lance. They gave me a pretty good bruise, when they threw me into this cage. Yeah, me too, replied Lance, as he glanced at his right back legs huge bruise. Do you think we’re going to get outta this alive? Asked Twilight. Don’t know said Lance, as he stroked Twilight’s mane. A Russian soldier walked by, as he did, Twilight heard his keys jingling in his pocket. She used her magic, and slowly removed they keys from the soldiers pocket. Then using her magic she pushed the right key into the lock, and unlocked the cage. The door swung open. Come on, Lance whispered, and together, they walked out of the cage, and down the center of the ship.
Chapter 34
Sao' Pablo international airport Brazil
Jerry went over his pre-flight check list again. He was ecstatic that a Brazilian pilot had traded his Apache, for a Huey. Jerry looked over the Huey's Twin left side M-60 machine guns. As he approached the tail of the Huey, He noticed Church, was walking towards him, along with two other men, and what appeared to be six ponies. Jerry, were going to go make an attack on a Russian freighter, said Church, you wanna come? That's piracy, which is against the law don’t ya know, said Jerry. Fine, Church said, and then I guess, you don't wanna save an Equestrian princeand get rewarded a lot of money for doing so. I'm suddenly enthralled don’t ya know. Jerry said. Ok, Frank said, you Ferry us to this ship the Moldova, Frank said pointing to the map he had. And when we save the Equestrian prince, you will be reward with riches beyond your wildest dreams Frank concluded. For the riches I'm in Jerry said. Cowboy hopped up into the Huey. Applejack followed him. This helicopter doesn’t look sanitary Rarity said, as she climbed into the Huey. Did that pony just talk? Asked, Jerry. Oh, yeah that’s another thing Cowboy said, there are talking ponies living in the jungle. Far out, said Jerry. This is going to be so much fun Pinkie Pie exclaimed as she hopped up into the Huey. I've got the left side M-60's said Frank. I'll take the left side said Cowboy as he climbed into the gunner's seat. Rainbow Dash, are you coming? Fluttershy quietly asked. I'm flying Rainbow Dash responded, as she unfolded her wings. I'll race you said Jerry. You're on said Rainbow Dash. Jerry took the Huey above the tree tops, then gunned as they shot over the coast and hit the ocean. We’re commin, Twi said Applejack.
Chapter 35
Russian Freighter Moldova, sixty one kilometers off the cost of Brazil
Boris, where are my field glasses, asked Ptrankativich. There underwater in Equestria, comrade general Boris replied. I'm just happy that you made it out alive, Ptrankativich said. As am I comrade Boris said. Well Boris, there is this dot on the horizon, and in my old age, I cannot make out what it is Ptrankativich said. Perfectly ok, Boris, said, as he removed a pair of binoculars from the wall of the ship's bridge, and handed the binoculars to Ptrankativich. It’s a helicopter Ptrankativich said. One of our? Asked Boris. Not unless we have stated using the +++American flag, said Ptrankativich. It's them said Ptrankativich. How can you be so certain, Boris asked? Look for yourself, Ptrankativich said. Boris took the binoculars from Ptrankativich, and saw Rainbow Dash, flying straight towards them. Yep, it’s them alright, Boris remarked. Ptrankativich picked up a radio, bring Twilight Sparkle to the bridge, Ptrankativich instructed. Comrade General a soldier's voice came over the radio, both Twilight Sparkle and the Prince are gone! Gone, gone were? Asked Ptrankativich dumbfounded. Find them Ptrankativich ordered. They can't have gone far. Yes, Comrade General the soldier replied. Ptrankativich walked over to a gun rack on the wall, and removed his gold plated SKS rifle which he loaded. Come Boris, we have some Capitalists to kill Ptrankativich said.
Chapter 36
Huey helicopter approaching Russian freighter Moldova off the coast of Brazil
How do y’all know that this is where Twilight and Lance are? Asked Applejack. Ptrankativich has to get them, and his army back to Russia, explained Frank, Ptrankativich simply doesn’t have enough planes to move his whole army that way. Then, a burst of flak exploded twenty feet to the right of the Huey. They were expecting us Frank said. I'm bringing her around, said Jerry. Try to take out those ZSUs on the deck. Rodger Frank replied. Frank swung the Twin M-60s around and sprayed bullets into a ZSU anti-aicraft gun on the deck. The ZSU exploded. Bring us around! Frank cried. I'm trying, don't ya know! Jerry replied. A lone Spentaz operator climbed on top of the Moldova's superstructure and fired off an RPG at the Huey. RPG! Frank yelled. Jerry jerked the stick hard to the left, and the Huey, immediately responded. The hard left caused Rarity to loss her balance and she fell to the deck of the Moldova. Rarity! Fluttershy cried. Come one we gotta get down there! Applejack said. Applejack grabbed a rope and slid down to the deck of the Moldova. Jerry turned the Huey. The Huey was now facing the Moldova, and fired a burst of 50.cal machine gun bullets into the upper deck, killing multiple Spentaz. You alright sugarcube? Applejack asked Rarity. I'm fine, Rarity replied. Let's do this. Rainbow said, as she lept from the Huey, and spread her wings. She then flew down to the deck, and roundhouse kicked a Russian soldier in the side of the head, knocking him over the rail, and into the ocean. Come on Fluttershy! Frank called as he grabbed the rope. Oh, but it’s such a long way down Fluttershy said. You'll be fine Frank said. Okay, Fluttershy said, as she spread her wings and flew down to the deck. Glad you could join the party Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash said as she punched a Russian soldier in the gut, dropping him to the deck of the Moldova. We need to find Twilight! Rarity called over the commotion. We'd better do it fast, Frank added, in less than five minites the U.S. Navy is gonna send this rust bucket to the bottem. This way, Applejack said opening a door to the lower decks of the Moldova. Which the rest soon dashed through.
Chapter 37
Inside the freighter Moldova, off the cost of Brazil
Do you know were we are? Twilight nerviously asked. I bet we're somewhere near the engine room, hear the roaring sound? Replied Lance. What are we going to do? Asked Twilight. Well, I figure, we head up to the top deck and commander a life boat, before Ptrankativich realizes were gone. Lance responded. Sounds like a plan Twilight said. Twilights and Lance rounded a corner, which when they turned came face to face with an armed pair of Russian soldiers. The Russian soldier on the left immedatly dropped the ciggerate he was smoking, and began to raise his AK-47 to fire, just as he had shoudered the AK, Frank shot him in the back of the neck, killing him instantly. The second Russian soldier wipped around to face Frank and the others, as he did so Lance charged him and stabbed him throught the back with his horn. A look of confusion shot across the Russian soldier's face, as he died. Hey, we're here to rescue you guys! Pinkie Pie exclaimed. Twilight and Lance both began to smile. Come on, let’s get off this ship Frank said. Sounds like an amazing idea Applejack said. One question, how in God’s name do you plan to get off the ship? Cause I know for a fact that Jerry's long gone, Church asked. Well, Frank said we're gonna have to swim for about three minutes until the U.S. Navy arrives. Shoot, that ain't nothing we can do that easy Cowboy said. We sure can! Said Pinkie Pie. Remember guys you have to think postive thoughts, Pinkie Pie Added. Oh no, I just thought a negative one! Frank sighted. COME ON! Church cried. The Navy is on its way, and I do not wanna be on this ship when it gets here.
Chapter 38
USS. Ronald Reagan
Sir, target is eight klicks to the south moving at fifteen and a half knots sir! A seamen reported. Very good, I want every gun in this fleet raining down hell on that commie S.O.B. Adimiral Chairwood said. Yes, sir The seaman said. Oh, and one more thing, after that ship has been destroyed, sent out choppers and dingey's to search for surrivors Chairwood added. Yes Sir! The seaman agin replied.
Chapter 39
Freighter Moldova off the coast of Brazil
What in the hay is ,that? Applejack asked. Oh crap, It’s the Stout Frank said. Which is what? Asked Twilight. She's a guided missle destroyer, Frank replied. That sounds really scary, Fluttershy added. So, it gonna send this ship to the bottom correct? Asked Lance. Yeah, it is Frank said. Then a white cloud of smoke appeared on the front deck of the Stout, followed by a small explosion on the super structure of the Moldova. That’s it? Rainbow Dash said puzzled. That’s the best your U.S. can do? No, that was only a ranging shot, Frank explainded. It tells the gunners how far away their target is. Well, let’s get off this rig, Church said. As he leaped from
the deck of the Moldova into the Alantic ocean. My turn, My turn, Pinkie Pie cried, as she too jumped from the ship into the water. One by one they jumped into the water, until only Twilight and Lance remained on the deck of the Moldova. Ladies first, Lance said. Twilight smiled and began to walk towards the railing, to dive off, then a gun shot rang out. Twilight fell to the deck, a bullet had hit her in the flank, just above her left rear leg. No! Lance cried. He whipped around to face he shooter, and came face to face with Ptrankativich. Hello Capitalist dog! Ptrankativich said. I'm gonna kill you Lance said. We shall see, Ptrankativich. said as he raised his SKS to fire. Lance lowered his horn and charged at Ptrankativich. Ptrankankativich pulled the SKS's trigger, and instead of a bang, the weapon went click. Ptrankankativich immedatly removed the SKS magzine and inserted a new one. He cocked the SKS, but before he could fire, Lance drove his horn, straight throught Ptrankanktivich's chest. Ptrankanktivich crumbled to the deck, and passed out. Lance pulled his horn from Ptrankanktivich's chest, and ran over to Twilight. Twilight are you alright? He asked. I'm not feeling so good, she replied. Come let’s get off this ship Lance said. Then Twilight blacked out.
Chapter 40
Rubber raider dinghy, off the coast of Brazil
Twilight eyes fluttered open, and she sat up .Steady there a seaman said, gripping Twilights front right hoof. You will be alright, he added. Major, she's okay. We thought we lost you for a moment there Frank said, as he walked over to Twilight. Lance also walked over to Twilight. Did we win? Twilight asked. Look for yourself, Lance said. As he helped Twilight up. As Twilight began to glance around, all she could see was a massive wall of U.S. Navy ships. The all too familiar sound of jets and helicopters dround out any other sound. Twilight noticed U.S. Navy divers jumping into the water, to recover the remains of the Moldova. Suddenly a Seahawk helicopter flew up to and hovered next to the dinghy. I can't send you anywhere without you starting world war three? Can I Frank General Rose shouted from aboard the Seahawk. I guess not sir, Frank responded, as he climbed aboard the Seahawk, followed by Cowboy, Church, and the ponies. The Seahawk, took off heading for the Ronald Reagan. You've done a great debt, General Rose said. How can we ever repay you? Well, a ton of cash would be nice, Church said. Rarity poked Church with her horn. What? Church asked. No payment is necessary general, we do are service free of charge, Twilight said. Well, they do their service free of charge, but I charge ten grand by the hour Church said. General Rose let out a quick laugh. The Seahawk then touched down on the deck of the Ronald Reagan. If you would be as so kind to follow me, General Rose said. The ponies and men followed General Rose into the Ronald Reagans bridge. You must be Twilight Sparkle Admiral Chairwood said. In the flesh, Twilight said. Oh, sweat Jesus, you've been shot Chairwood said, pointing to Twilights bandged wound. Yeah, it hurts pretty bad, Twilight responded. Enginsn! Chairwood cried. Yes sir, a salier reported. Get misses Twilight Sparkle to the sick right this instant. Yes sir. The sailer replied. Ma'am if you'll be as so kind to follow me, I can lead you to sick bay. Wait, Twilight said. What is it? Asked Chairwood. What happens now that Ptrankativich has been defeated. Well, once you come out of surgey, you and your ponies will be flown by helicopter back to Ponyville. Applejack, Cowboy said. What is it Sugarcube? Applejack replied. I was hoping to stay with you, you see some men in Texas are holding my sister and Ranch hostage, if I go back, they'll kill her. So I was hoping to stay at sweet apple achers until I can figure out a plan to take my ranch back. Sugarcube, there will always be a place on my farm for you Applejack replied. I can't thank you enought, Cowboy said. I'm gonna stay in Equestria too, Church said. Well, you go ahead, Frank said. Oh, Frank you been reinstated at your former rank of Major, general Rose said . Thank you sir, Frank replied. I thought I'd say it sir, but I'm actually ready to go back to Afganstan, Frank said. Well, your not, General Rose said. Excuse me sir? Frank said. Well, now that everyone and his buddy knows about Equestria we need you to stay in Ponyville, to insure the safety of the town. Yes sir, Frank replied as he started to cry. Look at that, Frank's so happy to stay, he's crying, Pinkie Pie said. Ain't that a sight Applejack said.
Chapter 41
Moscow, Russian Federation
Comrade President, the Moldova has been sunk off the coast of Brazil, an aid informed Putin. Is Ptrankativich alright, Putin asked. No, we have reason to believe that Comrade Ptrankativich is dead. Putin stood up and pushed his chair in. Then these little ponies have left me no other option, we stall unleash our nuclear missles against Equestria, Putin said. Comrade President, are you sure you wish to take this course of action? Putin's Aid asked. Of course! These imperial dogs shall not live to see the light of another day! Yes, comrade President, the aid said, as he turned and walked out the door. The aid, opened the door to Putin's office, walked out and shut the door behind him. Comrade Docotivich, Putin is going to nuke Equestria. Do not send the order, Docotvich said. I'll reason with the President. Yes Comrade Docotivich, the aid said as he walked away. Docotivich sided, put on his hat, and walked into Putin's office. Comrade Docotivich! Putin greated warmly. Comrade President, I have heard some very unnerving news, Doctovich coldely said. What might this news be? Putin asked. I hear that you plan to create a nuclear war with Equestria, is this true? Docotivich asked. Yes, it is true Putin responded. I strongly recommend that you rethink that course of action. No, Putin replied. Well, then you leave me with no option, Docotivich said. What are you going to do? Putin asked. Eat lunch with you, Doctovich replied. Sounds like a fair punishsment, Putin said laughing. Two aids approched Putin and Docotivich and put a silver platter with roasted goose in front of each of them. An aid began to pour a glass of wine, but Docotivich interuped. I have brought vodka to keep us warm in the cold. Very good! Putin said, please pour me a glass. Of course comrade President, Doctovich said as he poured Putin and himself a glass. Putin immedatly drank his vodka. Docotivich reached for his glass and pretended to accidently knock over the glass. Clumsy, me he said as he picked up a towl and cleaned up the spilt vodka. So why do you want me to call off the nuclear strike off? Putin questioned. Well comrade president, I would perfer to tell only you alone, Doctovich said. Of course my friend Putin responded, please leave us. The aids all left the room. So why? Because, Doctovich said many years ago I made a promise to an Eqestrian named Shinging Armor, I promised him that I would not allow Equestria to fall. Well clearly, you will have broke your promise Putin said. It is hot in here? Yes, Putin said for he was sweating heavly. Putin then removed his shirt. No, Docotivich said you must die to prevent Equstria's demise, so I poisned your Vodka. You are now going into cardiac arrest. You will soon be dead. You...are...a....traitor. Putin stammered, as he staggered up againist his desk. Do not worry, I will reform the Soviet Union, I promise, Docotvich said. Putin then fell to the ground dead. Docotivich ran to the door and opened it. Comrades come quick! Docotivich cried. What is wrong? An aid asked. Putin is having a heart attack! Docotivich said. Oh, sweet Stalin! An aid cried. Call a doctor. Docotivich began to walk down the hall, when an aid ran up to him. Comrade Docotivich! The aid called. What is it? Docotivich asked. Princess Celestia is here to meet with Putin. What? Docotivich said, well who's next in line? You are, replied the aid. Docotivich walked back to the office. As he sat down in his new desk, he saw a group of aids putting Putins body in a black body bag. An aid walked over to his desk and asked, what is our first order of buisness Comrade President? We are no longer the Russian Federation, we are agin the Soviet Union. Yes Comrade Premier, the aid responded. He soon returned caring a hammer and sickle flag, which he used to replace the Russian Federation flag behind Docotivich's desk. Then the aid held open the door to the office. Princess Celestia, of Equestria, the aid announced, then walked out. Docotivich where's Putin! Celestia demanded. He's dead, he was going to launch a nuclear strike on Equestria, I had to prevent him from doing so. So your still on our side? Celestia said. Of course, Doctovich. All Soviet troops will pull off of Equestria to the region we purchased from Brazil, Doctovich said. Very well Docotovich. I wish for you to annouance Equestria's Exzistance to the world. Okay Celestia said, but from where shall I broadcast from, this very office, Docotivich said. Thirty minutes later Docotovich's office was all ready to transmit. Please sit at my desk Docotovich said. Thank you Celestia said. She then proceded to sit down and the cameras began to roll. To all of the people of the world, I wish to extend an offer of peace. I am Princess Celestia, Co-ruler of Equestria. My ponies only wish the well being of you and your loved ones, and to be treated as equals. We have long hid from the prying eyes of humanity, but no longer. I do applojise, but I was hiding my subjects from the rest of the world for their safety. For we believed that humanity was a brutal war like race. However, I have discovered that this could not be more false. The acts of kindness and genrosity, I have witnessed have amazed me. I have also seen act of evil and injustice, however the extent of your love has far outweight these act, I hope to build a long lasting relationship with humanity, and for my subjects to be excepted by your culture, thank you. Celestia bowed, and the crew finished filming. Now we see what the world does, Celestia said. I hope they do not fear us. Oh, no you shall be excepted, I know this for a fact, Docotovich said smiling.Chapter 41
Ponyville, Equestria
Welcome to my, err our home Twilight said. Man, I've never seen so many books before Lance said. Well, I'am the libarian for Ponyville. Sweet, Lance said. Oh, and I'd like you to meet someone, Twilight said. Spike! Get down here. Yes Twilight, Spike said as he ran down the stairs. This is Lance, he's my Coltfriend. Oh, great Spike thought. Twilight get out here! Frank called. Be right back, Twilight said. Twilight walked out the door. If you mess with Twilight I'll kill you, Spike said. Listen, squirt I love Twilight, and no pint sized dragon is gonna stop me from seeing her. Hey Lance come check this out! Twilight called. Lance trotted over to Twilight and the other ponies as well as Cowboy, Frank, and Church. Okay, Frank why did you bring us out here to look at a truck. In front of the group stood a Duce and a half U.S. army truck. In the Back the cargo was covered with a tarp. Hey there's a note Cowboy said. Twilight used her magic to remove the note from the grill of the truck, she then began to read the note. To my most loyal apperantice Twilight Sparkle and her friends, I have never been more proud of you, you came together to form a team, and even thought you were faced with certain defeat, you pressed on to defeat our most dangerous advasiry, I feel that this "scrap metal" should be enought payment.
P.S. The Truck is for Frank, I appolijise for wreaking in back in 96".
Yours Truly Princess Celestia
Scrap metal, why in tarnation, would Celestia give us scrap metal? Applejack wondered. Well, maybe she wanted us to make pretty sculptures, Fluttershy suggested. Well, this bites, thanks for lousey gift Celestia, Rainbow Dash said. Then she flew over and kicked the tire of the duce and a half. The tarp fell off revealing the truck bed was full of gold ingots. Were rich! Cried Church. Oh, I'll be able to design a thousand dresses with this much gold Rarity said. I'm gonna buy me a new boat, Cowboy said. I'm just happy to have my truck back Frank said. Hey, let’s take a photo Spike suggested. That sounds like a great idea. Fluttershy said. Everyone gathered in around Franks truck. Say cheese! Spike called. He then snapped the picture.
Chapter 42
Near the wreck of the Moldova, off the coast of Brazil
Do you see anyone? Boris asked. Not yet comrade, the Mi-8 HiP helicopter pilot shouted back over the deep thumping sound of the helicopters rotors. Down there! Boris called pointing to a floating timber. It’s Ptrankativich! Called the co-pilot. The pilot brought the helicopter down to ten feet above Ptrankativich. Then a rescue diver jumped into the water, he put Ptrankativich onto a folding strecher then the helicopter co-pilot dropped the cable for the rescue crane. The diver hooked up both himself and Ptrankativich to the cable. The co-pilot then whinched them both into the helicopter. Is he alive Boris asked.
Yes, the Co-pilot responded.
