The Life I Lead

Moonbeam took another swig from the bottle and closed the cap, taking in his surroundings.  He was near a small grove of trees along one of the many paths that cut through the park, seated on a bench.  The alcohol had made its way throughout his body, numbing the pain left over from Rarity's betrayal.  Yeah, he thought to himself, that is exactly what it was.  Betrayal.  Suddenly, the metal armrest of the bench slammed into the side of his skull as he tipped over to the side, prompting a colorful stream of Stallian curses as he struggled to pick himself back up.  His hoof slipped off the front of the bench, and the rest of his body followed suit.  The next thing he knew he was laying on his back, staring at the stars.  It was a clear night, and the stars were shining brightly.  Moonbeam realized that he couldn't remember the last time he took the time to look at the beauty of the stars, and his mood grew serene as he stared in wonder at the glittering diamonds that hung suspended in the sky.  He always felt most at home at night, enjoyed the silence and calm that came when Celestia lowered the sun and Luna raised the moon.  He closed his eyes for a few seconds, and drifted into an alcohol-induced slumber.

~~

He felt himself being shaken violently, and he awoke with a jolt as his mind finally realized somepony was trying to wake him up.  He covered his face, trying to escape back into limbo by blocking the intruder from seeing him.  It didn't take Moonbeam long to realize that he wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon, and with a grunt, he waved a hoof lazily to signify he was awake.  The shaking stopped, and he opened his eyes to see a cyan pegasus looking down at him sternly.  Moonbeam groaned.  Great, just who I wanted to see.  He sat up shakily, realized that it was still dark out, and that there were two Rainbows now.  He promptly fell over to the side as he realized he hadn't been out for long, and he still had an absurd amount of alcohol in his veins.  "Waddya want?"  He growled from his slumped position.  When the pegasus didn't respond, he tried to make eye contact, but he couldn't keep it for long.  He was able to discern that Rainbow was not happy with him just from the look on her face.  He propped himself up on the bench next to him, and groped under it in an attempt to locate the bottle of vodka.  After a couple seconds of muttering Stallian curses under his breath, he heard Rainbows voice behind him.

"Looking for this?"  He turned around, barely escaping falling over again, to see Rainbow holding the bottle in her hoof.

"Why, yes!  How did you know?"  He replied, struggling to convey sarcasm through his drunken slurring coupled with his accent.  He reached for the bottle, but Rainbow pulled it back before he could even get close.

Rainbows face hardened.  "No.  You're in no condition to be drinking any more, you're plastered enough as is.  Now come back to the Boutique, Rarity's worried sick."

Moonbeam's voice grew cold.  "If Rarity wants to talk to me, she can come get me herself."

At this, Rainbows face betrayed her anger, and she lunged forward, her face inches away from Moonbeam's.  "Look," she growled, "Rarity is a nervous wreck.  She thinks that you're going to hurt yourself, and I'm not convinced you won't either.  You need to come back."

Moonbeam did not move an inch, the alcohol coursing through his veins dulled whatever reaction he may have had to Rainbows sudden outburst.  He stared back at the pegasus with fire in his eyes.  "You do not understand! Rarity broke only promise I have ever asked her to keep.  Only pony that ever showed me any form of friendship betrayed me!"  His voice cracked as the fire in his eyes faded and was replaced by the lifeless look that usually occupied them.  "I don't think you realize how much that hurts."  He squeezed his eyes shut as tears began to form, and he wobbled slightly before he picked himself up and sat down heavily on the bench, burying his head in his hooves.

A pang of pity hit Rainbow as she looked at the miserable stallion in front of her.  No matter what he did, his demons had a way of catching up to him.  He came all the way from Fillydelphia to Ponyville for a fresh start, but he didn't get a fresh start.  He had his problems chase him down and tackle him from behind, and now he was turning to alcohol, which didn't seem to be working out too well either.  She sat down next to the stallion, who was now shaking as he choked back tears, and sighed.  "Moonbeam, I can't pretend to know exactly what that feels like, but I've got demons of my own."

Moonbeam sniffled and leaned back in the bench.  "Everyone has their problems.  Some are just worse off than others."  He shifted his gaze to the cyan mare, who looked back sadly.

Rainbow began to recount her memories, a melancholy look on her face.  "When I first got into flight school, the other foals thought my mane was an oddity, and teased me for it."  Seeing Moonbeams slightly confused look, she clarified.  "It's natural." She stated flatly, prompting a nod of understanding from the stallion.  "At first it was pretty innocent, just playful jokes."  She let out a long sigh.  "Then we got older.  Everypony became was convinced that between my mane and tomboyish attitude that I was a fillyfooler."  She turned her head straight, and leaned back in the bench as well, a distant look in her eyes.  "But I'm not.  For six years I was taunted every day in school, always reminded that I was an abomination.  I started to resent everypony and everything for being normal and happy.  I only had one friend over that time, a griffon named Gilda who shared my attitude.  Of course, that only convinced the others of my... preferences, and the teasing got worse.  I was trapped in this hell of a life with no way out and not enough allies."  She looked at Moonbeam, her face blank but her eyes moist.  "After a while you just kinda-"

"Stop feeling.  Go numb to everything around you."  The stallion cut her off mid-sentence, and she nodded.  The two locked eyes, and Rainbow thought she could see Moonbeams very soul through his crimson eyes.  The veil of lifelessness seemed to lift, and she could see a fiery determination to live fighting desperately against the biting cold of solitude.  After a long pause, Rainbow finally spoke.

"Yeah.  Exactly."  Neither pony looked away from the other, both caught up in the realization that they weren't alone.

After another long pause, Moonbeam looked up to the sky, gazing at the moon and stars.  "Is that why you started stunt flying, to get away from insults?"

"Yeah, It gave me something to focus on, to look forward to.  Plus, the adrenaline kinda drowned out the hurt."  Rainbow looked inquisitively at the stallion, trying to gauge his thoughts.  Failing that, she opted to break the silence surrounding the pair.  "Is it just me, or is your accent thicker when you're drunk?"

"It is difficult to speak Equestrian properly when I am sober, let alone drunk."  Moonbeam mumbled softly, still staring at the stars.  A long silence followed, which allowed him to think about the situation.  Now Rainbow knew about his troubled past, but he also knew about hers.  It was a tradeoff, with Rainbow telling him her secrets as a form of collateral, or at least that's how Moonbeam perceived it.

Finally, Rainbow spoke.  "You gonna come back now?"

The stallion sighed, defeated.  "Da."

~~

When the pair ambled through the door to the Boutique, Moonbeam leaning heavily on Rainbow in an effort to stay upright, Rarity shot towards the drunken stallion, nearly tackling him in a hug and babbling incoherently about how sorry she was.  By the time Rainbow got the marshmallow mare off of Moonbeam, she had calmed down enough to notice how drunk he was.

"Moonbeam!" She cried in a scolding voice only Rarity could pull off, "you're drunk!"

"And what gave that away, fact that I can't walk straight or fact that Rainbow has half bottle of vodka?"

Raritys face grew stern.  "Don't speak to me in that way!  You could've hurt yourself!"

"Rarity, I do not want to talk right now.  We will talk in morning, when I can speak proper Equestrian."

And with that, the stallion hobbled over to the stairs and stumbled his way up, assisted by Rainbow, who had to practically carry him up the stairs.  When Rainbow came back downstairs, she found Rarity sitting at her kitchen table, her head buried in her hooves.  Rainbow sat down and wrapped an arm around her comfortingly.  "He's not very happy with you, but he's not going to leave.  We had a long talk once I found him."

Rarity looked up at Rainbow, a concerned expression on her face.  "What did you talk about?"

Rainbow looked away.  "That's between Moonbeam and myself."

A mournful look took over Raritys demeanor.  "I see.  Well, I'm sorry to have got you caught up in all this, and thank you for finding Moonbeam."

Rainbow scoffed.  "Rarity, it's not as if what we talked about was anything you don't know.  And as for getting me involved, I was the one who agreed to help him at Weather Patrol.  Besides, you know I'm always happy to help."

"Thank you, Rainbow."

The cyan mare took her arm from around Rarity and stood up.  "Anytime, Rarity."  She trotted towards the door.  "And tell Moonbeam it's his day off tomorrow."  And with that, she left the Boutique and shot off towards her cloud home, a rainbow trailing behind her.