I Can't Stand You Rainbow Dash

“Not gonna lie guys. Today has been a hell of a day for me.” I say trudging along behind Rainbow and Fluttershy.

“Jeez, why are you such a wuss?” Rainbow asks while snickering to herself. Fluttershy looks at Rainbow and hits her on the back of her head with a wing.

“None of that now, he’s tired and you promised no more fighting for a while.” Rainbow just groans and rolls her eyes.

“I’m not laying a hoof on him! I’m just poking fun is all.” Rainbow turns to me and sticks out her tongue which promptly gets her another hit with a wing. I chuckle at this while we walk.

“Looks like the mighty Rainbow can be stopped by some soft feathers.” I laugh but quickly shut myself up after seeing Fluttershy eye me. When I stop Fluttershy smiles.

“Thank you. Now then I want both of you to be on your best behavior when talking with Twilight. We need to all put our heads together to find out how to get Thomas home.” Rainbow looks back at me and nods her head.

“Yeah the sooner we get him home the better.” Fluttershy glares at Rainbow who winces.

“I meant because he wants to go home. Not because I want him gone.” Rainbow chuckles sheepishly.

“Well regardless, let’s hurry up to the castle and talk with Twilight then.” I say as we continue down the road until eventually reaching the crystal castle.

“Woah, Twilight lives here? It’s massive.” I say looking up and taking in the massive structure. Rainbow beams.

“Yup this is where my good friend Twilight the princess of friendship lives.” At this I stare at Rainbow dumbfounded and start to laugh.

“How is she the princess of a concept? That’s so ridiculous. Does that mean I have a chance to become the king of puns and get my own castle? Oh! Maybe it will be made to look like a cat! Get it? A cat-sle.” I laugh at my own dumb joke but Rainbow looks annoyed at me.

“How do you become a pain in my flank so easily?” Rainbow asked me while groaning.

“Call it talent but between you and me it takes years to get this good.” I wink at her and chuckle. As we get to the castle I open the door and look inside.

“Did Twilight forget to pay the electric bill? Why is it so dark?” I say to Rainbow and Fluttershy as we enter. They both get a knowing look on their faces and laugh. I freeze as the door closes behind us engulfing us in darkness. Suddenly the entrance is illuminated and I hear a large group shout.

“Surprise!” They all say and I look seeing a bunch of ponies smiling at me. I stare at them in shock.

“Uh what is going on?” I look around confused and see it. The demon from my nightmares. The Pinkie balloon staring me down. I scream a less than manly scream as I see it take up my vision. Rainbow dash falls over laughing at me as I try to recuperate. I cough and clear my throat.

“I wasn’t scared. I was simply startled.” I said glowering at Rainbow who was still on the ground laughing. She wiped a tear from her eye and got back up.

“Keep telling yourself that. Glad to know the dangerous monster is so scared of a widdle pink balloon pony.” A lot of ponies laugh at this comment and I just get angry, my cheeks flushed red from embarrassment. I step out the front entrance and just head in a random direction. I stop after a bit of walking on a nice hill with a clear view of the night sky. I decide to lay down in the cool grass and look at the stars to calm down.

“This is all just a dream, nothing about this makes sense. It can’t be real, none of this is real.” I keep chanting to myself as though hoping that saying it will cause me to wake up in my own bed. I hear soft hoofsteps approach as I keep chanting to myself.

“Hey you ok dude?” I hear the familiar scratchy voice of Rainbow approach.

“Look I’m sorry for laughing at you… even if it was really funny and you totally deserved it.” I sigh and sit up.

“It’s not just that Rainbow. It’s all of this, everything that’s happened here so far. It all feels so real but there is no way in hell this is real. I’m either sleeping, in a coma, slowly dying, or insane at this point. Any one of those options makes more sense than what’s happening now. I know I’ve been playing it cool all day but it’s been constantly eating away at me and I think this mess is finally hitting me.” I say slowly, my eyes not leaving the night sky.

“Well I don’t know about you but I feel pretty real, and I’m sure this-” Rainbow hits me on my side.

“Feels real too.” She says with a snarky smile on her face.

“Ow yeah that feels pretty real.” I say rubbing my arm and staring at her annoyed now.

“Exactly! So stop moping around and come join us back inside the castle for your party. Pinkie spent all day planning it for you. The least you could do is come and have some free food. Even if you don’t feel like talking to anypony that’s fine. But come enjoy the party my friend made for you..” She looks at me expectantly. I stand up and pop my back while stretching.

“Fine you win, I’ll go to the party.” I say and start heading back to the castle.

“Good I’m not going to have you mope around when there is such a fun party happening for you so close by.” Rainbow heads back alongside me. As we enter the castle again all the ponies stop what they were doing and stare. The awkward air is thick as I stare back unsure what to do or say when suddenly Rainbow steps up and speaks.

“Alright everypony I brought back the moper. Now then let’s party!” She says, pumping her hoof in the air. Everyone cheers and goes back to doing what they were before we entered. Pinkie walks up to us with an apologetic look on her.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you upset. I just thought it would be funny if you saw another Pinkie balloon and thought it was alive.” She says with a glum look on her face. I kneel down and smile at her.

“Hey. It’s ok. I know you didn’t mean anything rude by it. Besides you aren’t the most annoying pony I’ve met. That honor goes to the blue wonder over here.” I say motioning to Rainbow who looks at me annoyed.

“Hey I dragged your mopey flank back in here for a fun time. Don’t make me regret it!” She huffs. I simply chuckle and ruffle her mane as she stares daggers into me.

“Yeah I know you did. So let’s wait until after the party to go back to fighting. Truce?” I say extending a hand. Rainbow looks at it as though it’s hiding a secret weapon to attack her with before looking into my eyes for any deception.

“Truce.” She finally says, shaking my hand with her hoof. After we do this pinkie cheers.

“Ooooh finally you two will be getting along! That makes me so super duper happy!” Pinkie smiles at both of us.

“Alright Thomas! Enjoy your party! I’m going to the dance floor to cut a rug!” Pinkie zooms off to the dance floor where I see her pull out a rug and a pair of scissors lost in deep concentration.

“Is she always like this?” I look to Rainbow with growing concern on my face. She just looks over at her friend and laughs.

“Yeah, that’s just Pinkie Pie. Like I said, don’t try to understand her. You’ll just get hurt.” As Rainbow explains this again I see Twilight approach us.

“Good evening you two! So Thomas, I figured by the time this party finishes it’ll be late so we can discuss the steps to get you home more tomorrow morning. In the meantime I hope you enjoy your party!” Twilight smile endearingly and heads back into the crowd of ponies to mingle.

“Well since this party is in full swing, what say you and I have some fun Rainbow?” She looks at me eyebrow raised.

“What did you have in mind?” She asks.

“Oh simple, I was thinking you and I play a little blackjack. I’m sure there’s a deck of cards here somewhere. If I win you have to wear that dress in full makeup and mane style all day. And you have to tell ponies who ask why it’s because you wanted to feel pretty.” I smile. Wicked grin at her. Rainbow looks at me with a determined look.

“Yeah well, when I win you have to admit I’m the best there is and do whatever I tell you all day tomorrow.“ Rainbow returns my grin.

“Ooh! And since I’m going to be dealer if I win, you both have to do the punishments!” Pinkie said dressed in dealer garb and shuffling a deck between her hooves. I look at her strangely for just a second but then shake my head, ignoring the thought.

“So Rainbow? You ready to do this?” I say with a confident smirk. She returns it and looks at me firmly.

“You know it! You’re so going down! Ok Pinkie! Deal is in!” Pinkie giggles and begins to deal.

“Hey Rainbow.” I say with a bit of uncertainty.

“What’s up?” She says, staring at her cards.

“Though I hate to say it. Thanks for bringing me back to the party. This is fun.” I smile as I grab my cards. She looks at me with a small smile.

“Of course, I’m not gonna see Pinkie sad after she did all this for you ya doof. Be glad I promised Fluttershy no fighting otherwise I really would have dragged you back. Hit me Pinkie.” A card is sent to Rainbow. I look at my cards and see I have twenty right now.

“You know, Rainbow. That’s how I ended up here to begin with. I was at a party before this all started. I’ll stay Pinkie.” Pinkie nods and looks at Rainbow.

“Hit me Pinkie.” Pinkie sends a card to Rainbow who looks at her hand and groans.

“So you were basically partying and ended up here? I can see why you don’t want to accept this all as real then. I’ll stay Pinkie.”

“Alright you two go ahead and show your cards!” Rainbow flips her cards over and I see she got 22 and busted over. I laughed and showed her my cards.

“Bam! Twenty! Read 'em and weep!” Pinkie shushes me And begins to show the dealer’s hand.

“Twenty-one! You both lose!” I stare at the cards in shock while Rainbow lets out a sigh of relief.

“At least I won’t be the only one embarrassed tomorrow.” Rainbow laughs.

“Well a deal is a deal. Alright tomorrow after I talk with twilight and you meet with Rarity. When we meet up I’ll do whatever the pretty pony princess desires.” I snicker a bit. Rainbow scowls for a bit before it changes into a devious smile.

“I look forward to it Thomas.” She says as she heads to the exit since the party is winding down.

“Wait, you seem very calm right now. What do you have planned?” I asked as she continued to walk to the door ignoring me.

“Pinkie, be honest with me. Will I survive tomorrow?” Pinkie giggles and bounces away while calling back.

“Silly Thomas, I can't see the future.” I look at her dumbstruck.

“Bullshit.” I say to myself as I yawn.

“Now to find the guest room here.” I say glancing around at the empty corridors. I sigh and start opening doors at random.