Author's Note
Requested several months ago, I can't say if requests will be a regular thing or not. I'll make chapters for Chrysalis, Nightmare Moon, and Sunset stories.
Mikey vs. Rarity
Glad I was able to avoid being murdered, though Pinkie did have a good point about sleep potions. I was on my way back from my weekly visit to Zecora's. Then I saw a chicken's head pop out a bush and I jumped back in fear, worrying it was a cockatrice. I landed in Poison Joke but didn't care, all that mattered was getting away from the petrifying monster. Then it walked out the bush followed by Fluttershy. Oh, it was just one of her chickens that had ran off, and was still running. Well good luck with that, Flutters. I wanted to get the cure for Poison Joke, but night was approaching and figured I could take care of it tomorrow. Considering I past by Rarity's place on my way home, I left a note on her door asking for help incase whatever the effects were rendered me immobile. The next day I woke up and quickly checked myself and-
"MOTHERFUCKER!!!" I yelled.
I thought I'd be prepared for whatever the consequences would be. Maybe being turned into an Equestrian creature, or getting my arms and legs swapped, or whatever. But I wasn't expecting this, getting gender swapped. What made it especially bad was the fact Rarity was the one I asked for help, of course it was then I heard a KNOCK KNOCK at the door.
"Mikey, Darling! I was told you might need assistance due to the effects of Poison Joke? I hope it wasn't anything too dreadful," Rarity said.
Doing my best impression of a male voice to hide what happened.
“Hey! Turns out I can still move, so no need to worry!” I yelled.
“Can I come in to check that everything’s ok?” Rarity asked.
“Not necessary! You wouldn’t want anyone seeing you as Hairity, now would you?” I said.
“Fair point, I’ll be on my way,” Rarity said as she left.
“Good. She’s gone, now to go to Zecora for a cure. But first, better layer up so no one can see my feminine figure,” I said before doing exactly that.
I speedran through Ponyville, and almost made it to the edge of the Everfree, but Sweetie Belle crashed into me while carrying scissors and I lost my layers. Good thing it was only those. Rarity came out ready to scold her.
“Sweetie Belle! What have I told you-Mikey? Is that you?” Rarity asked.
“Uhhhhh…..no?” I said.
The mare squealed and she ran towards me.
“Darling! You must let me design dresses for you! This is my only chance to make clothing for human females!” Rarity yelled.
I really didn’t want to, but figured I could potentially twist this to my advantage.
“One. That’s it, one. I really don’t wanna do this, so you owe me. You’ll have to pay for something I want at a future date, or do something for me for free. I dunno,” I said.
“Of course! Of course! You won’t regret this!” Rarity yelled.
And that’s where the problems started. Rarity was able to make the one dress no problem, but she was so excited she didn’t want me to leave.
“I said this was a one and done situation. I’m done. Please let me go,” I said.
“Just a few more hours, please? I promise I’ll make it up to you! I’ll owe you more favors! Just please stay!” Rarity begged.
I decided she was going crazy and made a run for it, but she magically tossed a dress onto me.
“Hey!” I yelled.
I tore it off and tried running again but Rarity threw makeup at me, by this world's logic it was applied perfectly even though she threw it. These shenanigans continued and she even managed to get a few pictures, though this was only after I got tired out. I looked like some chick from a fashion magazine and I hated it. I didn’t want to resort to violence, but she was pissing me off. I punched her and tried running again, but tripped due to the heels she gave me.
“Now. That wasn’t very lady-like, Mikayla,” Rarity said.
“Sleep with one eye open Rarity,” I threatened.
“Now, now. Don’t be like that, think of what this could mean! The fashion shows! Starring Equestria’s first human model!” Rarity yelled.
“NO!” I yelled.
Just then Twilight came in.
“Hi Rarity! I-uhhhh, what’s going on here?” Twilight asked.
“I’m simply trying to convince Mikayla here to be a fashion star! She’d make a most wonderful model!” Rarity said.
“Please just give me a cure for Poison Joke,” I said.
“Rarity, please just let him go,” Twilight said.
“NO!!!” Rarity yelled before picking me up with magic and running.
“Rarity! Get back here!” Twilight yelled as she ran after.
A week later, me and Crystal Shine went on a second date in Canterlot. We talked a bit about our personal lives.
“So what was your life back home?” Crystal asked.
“I was just a normal citizen, worked some fast food before moving to retail. Also lived with my parents and siblings. Not much to say, what about you?” I said.
“I’m in charge of a group that collects resources for the poor and unfortunate. We’re unfortunately not very well known, so we haven’t had much success,” she said.
“You’re a pony that likes to help others? Nice, you’re a real sweetheart,” I complimented.
Crystal chuckled.
“Well what can I say, it’s something I enjoy. What about personal hobbies?” she said.
“Video games, tv, and browsing the internet, man do I miss the internet,” I said.
“Curious, what is it?” Crystal asked.
“Basically like a network of information and entertainment with a large variety of said material. It’d be easier to show you if I could show you my memories,” I said.
She nodded.
“I see, I see. Me personally I love acting, putting on a performance is something I find to be absolutely wonderful! I’m also an expert at making costumes,” Crystal said.
The third date finally cemented our relationship. We just had dinner at my house, but it was still nice.
“Maybe I could help with your business? You said you’re not very well known, and if the world's only human gives you attention, that might help,” I offered.
“That sounds wonderful! Perhaps we could arrange something for tomorrow?” Crystal asked.
We agreed to meet in a private location. On my way there, I heard a faint buzzing the whole time. When I finally arrived I realized I must’ve been early since I was alone. I whistled to myself, then began speaking out loud.
“Looks like I might be out for a bit, good thing I left a note in case any of the ponies start to worry,” I said.
Just then the buzzing got louder and something tackled me, I got back up and counterattacked. My attackers were 2 changeling drones.
“Bring it, bugs! I have enough energy to beat up a whole swarm!” I yelled.
I could see the surprise on their faces.
“How!? You should be either drained of energy or under the queen’s control!” one yelled.
“Magic is unpredictable around me, I literally told her this when we went on our first date,” I said.
Then a familiar feminine voice spoke.
“What!?! You knew it was me this whole time?!!” ‘Crystal’ yelled as she emerged from hiding.
“Mhm, I sure did. From the first date. You should have remembered what I said, how unpredictable magic is towards me. The first time I got dizzy, second time no effect, third I got a boost of energy. You doing it right now gave me an even bigger boost! So I’m ready to fight all your minions,” I said.
“Wait. During our dates, I could tell the love you were radiating was genuine. And now you’re telling me you knew it was me the whole time?” she asked, blushing.
“Is that really so hard to believe? Also between the 4 of us, I kinda have a thing for bad girls,” I said flirtatiously.
“You dare talk to me this way?! The Queen Chrysalis!!?” she yelled defensively.
“Oh, nice to finally learn your real name,” I said.
“Should we continue with the plan?” one of the drones asked.
“I-let us just retreat for now. I need time to contemplate things,” Chrysalis said.
“Ok. When will we meet again? I was thinking instead of a dinner date, we could go out and do something fun like bowling or a movie?” I asked.
Chrysalis was frustrated and confused and flew away without responding. I shrugged and walked back home, she knows where I live so she can just visit me whenever she’s ready.
Author's Note
Me: I genuinely love you!
Chrysalis: (Has an existential crisis)
Two Drones: We're here too I guess.
Next is Nightmare Moon, will make another Chrysalis chapter that is not compliant with these events at some point