The Incredibly Bizarre Story of Vinyl the Vampire and Octavia the Werewolf and How They Learned to Stop Worrying and Love to Bite.

by Avenging-Hobbits

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Octavia, Comedy, Random, DJ P0N-3, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1588

Vinyl goes to a nightclub and gets turned into a vampire by accident while at the same time Octavia

After a night of hard-core-clubbing, Vinyl is picked up by a shady character and turned into a vampire. Octavia meanwhile gets bitten by a werewolf.

And yes. This is exactly what you think it is. A parody of the whole "Vampire Vinyl" concept. So yeah. Feel free to point out flaws, as long as it's constructive.

I'm writing this for kicks. So don't expect anything glorious. It's supposed to be stupid.

Published 2012-10-17 23:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-10-17 23:00:01 UTC

Clubbing Bites

Vinyl made her way through the darkly light nightclub, music drowning out almost all other sounds. She was on her way to bar to get a drink. DJ-ing was hard on the vocal chords. She sat at the bar.

“Hey.” Vinyl turned at the sound of the voice. Her eyes met a pair of blood red eyes, causing her to jump back in surprise. “Whoa! Don’t sneak up on me like that, dude!” the eyes belong to a rather tall, thin and incredibly pale Earth Pony. “So, what’s a pretty mare like you doing in a place like this?” Vinyl rolled her eyes at the terrible pick-up line. “Well, I’m getting a nice drink and my daily dose of mad beats to rock the streets.” The Earth Pony slipped closer, causing Vinyl to feel uneasy. “Really? So am I. What luck.”

Vinyl held up a hoof. “Dude. Back off. Your creeping me out.” The earth pony moved away. “So sorry. Didn't mean to frighten you. I’m a big fan of your work.”

This caught Vinyl attention. “Really? Awesome. What’s your name?”

“My name is Pyotr.” The earth pony said.

“What kind of a name is ‘Pyotr’? What is that, Germane?” Vinyl said. The earth pony rolled his eyes. “It’s the name my mother decided to give me. Do you have a problem with that?” he stared at Vinyl. Something about his eyes was freaking Vinyl out, but she couldn't peg what exactly. “Look colt.” She said, shifting on her hooves slightly. “You wanna drink? Cause it seems like you’re the drinking type.” Vinyl said, hoping that a few drinks would hopefully loosen up the situation.

“I’d love some.” He said, his voice now low. Is he trying to seduce me? Vinyl thought. “Well…” Vinyl said. “How about some cider.” She motioned to the bar tender, a grey colored earth pony with a martini shaker cutie mark. “Hey Shakes. Two cider’s for me and this colt.” The bar tender nodded and proceeded to whip a bottle of cider out from under the table and pour them both a glass. “Here you go.” He said, turning away. “Thanks Shakes!” Vinyl said. She drank the cider in one go. The strange earth pony didn't touch his drink, he simply stared at Vinyl. Vinyl now felt incredibly uncomfortable. She’d had her share to stalker fan boys, but something about this Lestat fellow seemed off.

“Look,” she said. The earth pony continued to stare at her. “I’ve gotta go to the bathroom, so I’ll be right back okay?” the earth pony nodded. “Of course my dear.”

“Haha” Vinyl said as she turned towards the bathroom. “Cute.” She quickened her pace. Okay, that is one creepy pony. She thought to herself.

///////////////////////////////

She stood in front of the bathroom mirror cleaning her hooves and muttering to herself. “Okay Vinyl, don’t freak out. He’s just a fan boy, you've dealt with those before. Nothing new.”

A fan boy that called me ‘my dear’. Vinyl thought. The thought made her shiver. “Okay, once you’re finished your going to go out there, tell him ‘Sorry, but your not my type’ and leave. Hopefully he won’t follow me home.” She said, looking in the mirror. Suddenly something in the mirror caught her eye. The bathroom stall door behind her opened. There was nopony inside. She jumped slightly and turned around, her horn ready to fling the nearest box of soap at any potential attackers.

Nothing. The bathroom was totally empty except for her. “Okay, chill Vinyl, it’s just your paranoia playing tricks on you.” She turned slowly back to the bathroom mirror. She finished drying her hooves and made her way out of the bathroom and into the nightclub.

She walked back to the bar, only to find that Lestat had left. “Hey, Shakes!” Vinyl said to the bartender. The bar tender turned. “Yeah, Scratch?” he said, cleaning a glass. “Where’d that weirdo go?” she asked.

“Which weirdo? I get a lot of weirdos here, it is a nightclub after all.” He said, leaning on the bar counter. Vinyl rolled her eyes. “You know, that creepy pale earth pony with the blood red eyes. That weirdo.”

“Oh him? He left as soon as you went to go use the mares room.” The bar tender said. “Why? Ya didn't like him anyways.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just kinda weird that I’m gone for two seconds and he leaves. He seemed pretty fixated with me.” Vinyl said.

“Well, who knows. Maybe he actually has a life.” The bar tender said, picking up another glass.

Vinyl rolled her eyes again. “Haha very funny. Well,” she took a glance at her watch. “Since it’s 3 AM I’ve gotta go, or I’m gonna have a hell of a head ache in the morning. Bye Shakes.”

“Bye Scratch.” The bar tender said.

///////////////////////////////

Vinyl walked home, still somewhat uneasy about the events at the bar. First, a creepy-as-all-get-out pony had attempted to pick her up and bathroom doors where opening on their own.

She walked past the park, her legs aching by now. Of course she had to pick the one nightclub that was farthest from her apartment. Ugh. She sat on a park bench, giving her legs a rest.

Just then a sound came from the bush next to the bench. “Hello?” Vinyl said, once again preparing to hurl anything at whatever might be in the bush. “Who’s there?”

The sound continued as Vinyl levitated a rock, ready to strike down any potential threats. Out of the bush popped a little bunny. “Oh, thank Celestia.” Vinyl said, setting the rock back on the ground. Suddenly sounds came from the branches of the tree next to the bench. Vinyl looked up. Instead of a owl or a cat, she was greeted by a pair of fangs and a familiar pair of red eyes. She screamed and everything went black.

///////////////////////////////

Across the park, Octavia Philharmonica sat on a park bench as well. She was tired and exhausted, the concert not being her most well received performance. to be more precise the critics had bashed it senseless with all the grace of a baseball bat to the head. Feeling depressed she had spent the last four hours moping around town. "How was it, that I, Octavia Philharmonica, most well respected musician in Equestria could fail so miserably?" she said, taking another swing from the bottle of wine she had bought at the local liquor store. She looked up at the full moon above. "Well, at least Princess Luna did a good job on the moon tonight. Never seen it so full." she took another swing.

Unbeknownst to her however, a pair of green eyes watched her from a bush. The monster licked it's chops. Tonight it would eat well.

Octavia meanwhile continued to drink and bemoan her supposedly sad and pitiful life. Her cell phone beeped. She pulled it out and looked. "Oh, great. Pinkie." she said, rolling her eyes. She didn't hate her sister, by no means, but sometimes Pinkie Pie could be so, so random. Who else would call her at three in the morning?

She was just about to pick up the phone when she felt something hot on the back of her neck. She turned around to see the most terrifying thing she'd ever seen.

It was huge, black and hairy. It looked like an earth pony that hadn't shaved in a year. Except it had fangs. No, scratch that, not fangs, more like steak knives that grew out of it's jaws. And huge was an understatement. This thing was the size of a house. The monster growled at her.

Octavia did what any sensible pony would do when faced with such a sight. Turned tail and ran as fast as she could. The monster however leaped after her, easily matching her speed. It swiped a claw-endowed hoof at her, nicking her flank.

"OUCH!" she said, this only causing her to run faster. She ducked into a bush, ignoring the fact that the bush utterly destroyed her mane. "Okay, Octavia, get a grip." she said to herself, hyperventilating. "It's only a massive half-wolf-half-pony demon monster. Totally normal." She said, now rocking back and forth. "Just find your happy place, find your happy place."

She started to calm down. She peaked out of the bush. The coast seemed clear. "Good. I think it's gone now." she muttered to nopony in particular.

She walked as quietly as possible, hoping to Celestia that it wouldn't burst out of nowhere and rip her head off. Of course that's exactly what happened next. The monster jumped out of nowhere and lunged at Octavia once more, biting her left foreleg.

"OWWW!!!!!" she shrieked, kicking and bucking like mad. The monster let go, and Octavia whipped out her purse. She swung it around and landed a blow on the monsters head. The monster shook it's head, and then, after getting it's bearings attempted to bite her again. "Take this you overgrown mutt!" she whipped out a taser gun and tased the monster. The monster let out a roar and ran off, tail between it's legs.

Octavia sat down, exhausted. She took a look at her leg. For a giant monster, it actually hadn't caused that much damage. "I'd better get this bandaged." she said, as she got up and, making sure to keep the weight off her injured leg, walked in the general direction of Canterlot Hospital.

What's the worst that could happen? She thought.