Bubbles

by GlidingZephyr

Because author notes should be funny

Previous Chapter

Hopefully. Alternate endings should make you laugh hopefully. I don't want anypony to kill me.


Ending 1-Serious Subversion

"So, Ditzy. You're a mailmare now, and we're all in the same place again, so why not. What really happened. I mean, hey, you never said what. Fluttershy and I want to know."

"...are you crazy?! Why would I kill anypony. You want to know?"

"Um, yeah, if you don't mind... I lose sleep over it all the time..."

"We had a regular contest. A fort war. But we swore to use harmless weaponry. Thus, me using the cloud projectile cannon, and I gave her one of the same structure.

"Of course, since she's a cheating bastard she used the rainbow cannon. I saw, and of course she left it plugged in when we took to the skies.

"She followed me, and I did a barrel roll to overtake her. But she was stupid and did an aileron. I had front row seats to see her crash into a fountain and fall to her death below."

"...So, you weren't fearing for her job, but yours."

"Yep. We had these fort-fights before, you know. I just kept beating her. Of course she'd cheat again."

"So, what happened to your eye?"

"That? Um, I accidentally blew something up in my face. Heheh... but if I want, I can realign my eyes. It's as simple as lifting my hoof. Nay, lowering it. This is it's natural position. The explosion allowed for me to do this, not force me."

"Wh- so why the hell don't you usually have a straight sight?!"

"Leaves more character development, lets me see behind me for anypony trying to ambush me."

"Um, what happened to your Wonderbolts job?"

"I lied. Got the job. You really think crashing into posts and doing a bad job as a mailmare will get you enough money for a house and a child?"


Ending 2-Serious Self-insert

"So, what really happened?"

"...you really wanna know? Fine.

"So a red and black alicorn fell out of a rift in the sky yelling something about finally arriving in Equestria, then flew after me claiming that I should immediately love him.

"When he saw Gilda, he said he hated her and liked you, Rainbow Dash, more and said something like 'Hadouke-Hamekame- ro dah' and managed to blast a rainbow beam out of his hooves into Gilda.

"He yelled 'B4! I sunk your battleship!' and then talked about how he always wanted to taste the rainbow then ran towards the dorm.

"Of course I knew something was up, so I crashed into my room but he was there, and was laying on the bed with bedroom gaze.

"I kicked him out of there and he flew towards the lake. Gilda was about to get out, then she saw the red and black alicorn flash a smile at her in midair, so she jumped into the lake and drowned herself."

Rainbow Dash was just sitting back. "...That almost sounds like a fate worse than having Gilda as a torturer."

"I know, right? However, due to authors' sense of time, he should be here any minute now."

"FUCK! Well, with the true power of friendship we can banish him to the moon along with Discord 2.0 and Chrysalisis and Nightmare Moon's reincarnated state."


Ending 3-Serious S- insert execution-related word that starts with S

"I hate you all! I now am Carnifex Major and can kill both you and Fluttershy! Ha! You're dead! Next!"


Ending 4-Serious ZSero Wing

"What happen?"

"Somepony set up us the Rainbow Cannon. We get rainbows."

"wHAT!!!111!"

"Main pump turn on."

"It's you!"

"How are you gentlecoltzs? All your escape are belong to us. You are on the flight to destruction."

"What you say!!"

"You have no chance to fly make your aileron barrel roll. Ha ha ha ha ...."

"Gilda!!"

"Pull off every 'Aileron'!!"

"I know what I doing."

"Move 'Aileron'."

"For great justice."

ZZZZoooooooommmmmmmm

Rainbow Wings

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Author notes-Serious Stupidity

Okay, this will be short. Because really I have only one main thing to say.

I was just writing... then I wanted an allusion to the classic "Love and Tolerance" with Ditzy saying "I used to be able to tolerate her, but now I find no more love for that."

Of course that line was terrible and I removed it, but its effects remained.

What it did, is it brought me a vision.

This whole fic may be a subliminal conceit for bronies versus haters.

WOOOOOOAAAAH. Deep bro. That's trippy.

Then I realized that would never work and slapped myself.

Well, maybe its a good idea. I mean, it could work. But hey, it might not. You know, with Ditzy maybe murdering Gilda. Iunno. For all I know, she didn't.

But hey, its just a theory. A game the- no, its not that.

Though I took out that conceit, I always remembered one thing.

Maybe Ditzy murdering Gilda did work with this metaphor.

Maybe Freud and Jung were right. Maybe I did want this to happen. I cannot tell.

All my fics have a sense of retribution, revenge, and Nemesis. I'd like to think that, wouldn't I.

I'm tired. Go learn the difference between an aileron and a barrel roll. Brought to you by the same brony (yes, he is one! :D) who made me say that reference up there.